1 00:00:00,671 --> 00:00:02,109 Previously on... 2 00:00:02,133 --> 00:00:04,351 Orson's secret came out. 3 00:00:04,375 --> 00:00:07,684 So you don't know that your husband tried to kill Mike? 4 00:00:07,708 --> 00:00:11,358 And Bree couldn't forgive him. 5 00:00:11,382 --> 00:00:13,120 Lynette's stepdaughter Kayla... 6 00:00:13,144 --> 00:00:17,024 Never adjusted to being part of their family... 7 00:00:17,048 --> 00:00:20,127 But I'm never gonna love her, and you can't make me. 8 00:00:20,151 --> 00:00:23,500 And Dylan reconnected with her real father. 9 00:00:23,524 --> 00:00:25,507 I'd like to have a relationship with you, 10 00:00:25,531 --> 00:00:27,334 but if your mom is still scared of me, 11 00:00:27,358 --> 00:00:29,436 I don't wanna upset her again. 12 00:00:29,460 --> 00:00:31,360 I don't have to tell her. 13 00:00:37,568 --> 00:00:40,247 It happens in every marriage. 14 00:00:40,271 --> 00:00:44,551 Couples accumulate lovely things... 15 00:00:44,575 --> 00:00:49,196 Things that make a house a home. 16 00:00:49,220 --> 00:00:54,030 But when the home is broken, these things must be divided. 17 00:00:54,054 --> 00:00:56,503 The most dignified way to do this 18 00:00:56,527 --> 00:00:58,205 is for each spouse 19 00:00:58,229 --> 00:01:02,109 to keep what is most important to them. 20 00:01:02,133 --> 00:01:05,812 And Bree and Orson Hodge were nothing... 21 00:01:05,836 --> 00:01:08,145 If not dignified. 22 00:01:08,169 --> 00:01:10,647 I assume you'll want the pewter cat. 23 00:01:10,671 --> 00:01:12,619 That was my gift to you. 24 00:01:12,643 --> 00:01:14,621 You adored it, as I recall. 25 00:01:14,645 --> 00:01:17,205 That's why I'm giving you the choice. 26 00:01:19,410 --> 00:01:22,559 And what about that hummel from your aunt? 27 00:01:22,583 --> 00:01:24,060 It's ugly as sin, 28 00:01:24,084 --> 00:01:26,493 but she insists that it's valuable. 29 00:01:26,517 --> 00:01:29,096 You keep it. Keep everything. 30 00:01:29,120 --> 00:01:31,398 There's only one thing in this house that I want. 31 00:01:31,422 --> 00:01:33,770 I know, but I'm the one thing you can't have. 32 00:01:33,794 --> 00:01:36,173 Please, you have to forgive me. 33 00:01:36,197 --> 00:01:38,175 Orson, every wife understands 34 00:01:38,199 --> 00:01:40,407 that her husband will make a few mistakes... 35 00:01:40,431 --> 00:01:43,110 A forgotten anniversary, the occasional harsh word, 36 00:01:43,134 --> 00:01:45,417 but we all have to draw the line somewhere, 37 00:01:45,441 --> 00:01:47,584 and I'm drawing mine at the attempted murder 38 00:01:47,608 --> 00:01:49,586 of my best friend's husband. 39 00:01:49,610 --> 00:01:51,588 Bree, if I could open up my heart 40 00:01:51,612 --> 00:01:55,362 and show you how sorry I am, I would, but I can't. 41 00:01:55,386 --> 00:01:58,146 There must be something else I could do. 42 00:02:01,722 --> 00:02:03,770 There is one thing. 43 00:02:03,794 --> 00:02:05,832 Name it. 44 00:02:05,856 --> 00:02:07,874 Turn yourself in to the police. 45 00:02:07,898 --> 00:02:10,807 But the statute of limitations hasn't run out. 46 00:02:10,831 --> 00:02:12,609 They would arrest me. 47 00:02:12,633 --> 00:02:16,247 And you'd probably go to prison. Yes, I could go away for years. 48 00:02:16,271 --> 00:02:19,246 Exactly, and if you could muster that kind of moral courage, 49 00:02:19,270 --> 00:02:22,249 I think I could forgive you. 50 00:02:22,273 --> 00:02:24,691 Oh, come on. 51 00:02:24,715 --> 00:02:27,375 I promise I'll wait for you. 52 00:02:29,280 --> 00:02:31,298 Bree... 53 00:02:31,322 --> 00:02:33,922 I can't go to prison. 54 00:02:36,627 --> 00:02:39,187 Very well. 55 00:02:42,663 --> 00:02:45,141 So do you want the cat or not? 56 00:02:45,165 --> 00:02:48,275 In any separation, it's only fair 57 00:02:48,299 --> 00:02:52,539 that each spouse get to keep what is most important to them. 58 00:02:55,276 --> 00:03:00,287 That's how Bree Hodge got to keep her pewter cat... 59 00:03:00,311 --> 00:03:04,191 And Orson Hodge got to hold on to... 60 00:03:04,215 --> 00:03:06,855 His freedom. 61 00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:22,209 The suburbs are flush with a certain kind of fool. 62 00:03:22,233 --> 00:03:24,411 You know the type... 63 00:03:24,435 --> 00:03:27,584 The man who opens his door to total strangers... 64 00:03:27,608 --> 00:03:32,659 The woman who never uses her latch. 65 00:03:32,683 --> 00:03:34,961 It never occurs to them 66 00:03:34,985 --> 00:03:37,894 that letting someone into their home... 67 00:03:37,918 --> 00:03:42,369 Means letting them into their lives. 68 00:03:42,393 --> 00:03:45,280 Hi. I'm Ellie. I understand you got a room to rent. 69 00:03:45,304 --> 00:03:47,374 Yeah, come on in. 70 00:03:47,398 --> 00:03:49,205 So because of my husband's disability, 71 00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:51,538 our financial situation has changed, 72 00:03:51,562 --> 00:03:53,610 and we have this big house. 73 00:03:53,634 --> 00:03:56,618 Well, it's an amazing place, and I love the room. 74 00:03:56,642 --> 00:03:58,685 I can't believe it's still available. 75 00:03:58,709 --> 00:04:02,319 Well, you know... anyhow, uh, you have a great credit score. 76 00:04:02,343 --> 00:04:04,530 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, what was that? 77 00:04:04,554 --> 00:04:06,523 What was what? 78 00:04:06,547 --> 00:04:09,956 Ellie, did she just give me a dirty look? 79 00:04:09,980 --> 00:04:11,358 Uh... 80 00:04:11,382 --> 00:04:14,331 Yeah, I thought so. 81 00:04:14,355 --> 00:04:15,632 I'm sorry, Ellie. 82 00:04:15,656 --> 00:04:18,465 There's been some tension between my husband and me. 83 00:04:18,489 --> 00:04:21,468 See, the truth is, we could've had the room rented by now 84 00:04:21,492 --> 00:04:23,710 if my husband wasn't so paranoid. 85 00:04:23,734 --> 00:04:27,718 Why, because I wouldn't let the Swedish bodybuilder move in? You're as blind as a fruit bat. 86 00:04:27,742 --> 00:04:29,616 How would you know if he's a bodybuilder? 87 00:04:29,640 --> 00:04:33,420 I brushed up against him. I felt his bicep. It was huge. 88 00:04:33,444 --> 00:04:34,731 That wasn't his bicep. 89 00:04:34,755 --> 00:04:37,954 Why do you think he rushed out of here? 90 00:04:37,978 --> 00:04:41,728 Okay, I normally dig this sort of interpersonal stuff, 91 00:04:41,752 --> 00:04:44,831 but I have a class in 20, so back to me? 92 00:04:44,855 --> 00:04:46,333 You're right, Ellie. 93 00:04:46,357 --> 00:04:49,496 My husband was totally inappropriate. 94 00:04:49,520 --> 00:04:52,499 So a class? Are you a teacher? Actually, I'm an art student. 95 00:04:52,523 --> 00:04:55,810 My life was working pretty well, and so I decided to junk it 96 00:04:55,834 --> 00:04:59,876 and learn how to paint fruit. It's, uh, stupid, right? 97 00:04:59,900 --> 00:05:02,349 No, it's gutsy. 98 00:05:02,373 --> 00:05:04,781 Well, we like you, Ellie, 99 00:05:04,805 --> 00:05:07,283 and if you have first and last months' rent, 100 00:05:07,307 --> 00:05:09,916 we'd like you even more. Fantastic. 101 00:05:09,940 --> 00:05:13,590 I just hit the bank, so do you mind cash? 102 00:05:13,614 --> 00:05:16,663 Oh, no, I love cash. Cash and I go way back. 103 00:05:16,687 --> 00:05:18,895 So are you okay with this, 104 00:05:18,919 --> 00:05:21,598 or do you need to grope her, too? 105 00:05:21,622 --> 00:05:24,371 So that really wasn't the guy's arm? 106 00:05:24,395 --> 00:05:26,395 It had an elbow. 107 00:05:29,360 --> 00:05:32,078 Is this the clean pile? 108 00:05:32,102 --> 00:05:33,810 'Cause I'm not seeing it! 109 00:05:33,834 --> 00:05:36,413 You know what? Do 'em all again. 110 00:05:36,437 --> 00:05:39,816 This time, use a little elbow grease. 111 00:05:39,840 --> 00:05:41,317 How are they doing? 112 00:05:41,341 --> 00:05:44,020 They are not suffering enough for my taste. 113 00:05:44,044 --> 00:05:47,398 Are you sure that washing dishes is the right punishment? 114 00:05:47,422 --> 00:05:49,696 Well, gee, I'm kind of at a loss here, Tom. 115 00:05:49,720 --> 00:05:52,859 Dr. Spock didn't have a chapter on how to punish your kids 116 00:05:52,883 --> 00:05:56,507 for burning down a building. I just don't feel like we're handling this right. 117 00:05:56,531 --> 00:05:58,805 Maybe we should take 'em to therapy. 118 00:05:58,829 --> 00:06:00,807 Tom, they're not serial killers. 119 00:06:00,831 --> 00:06:02,338 They're two little boys 120 00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:05,372 who were afraid their parents were breaking up. 121 00:06:05,396 --> 00:06:06,543 But still... 122 00:06:06,567 --> 00:06:08,545 No. We can handle this in-house. 123 00:06:08,569 --> 00:06:11,718 We can make sure they never do anything like this again. 124 00:06:11,742 --> 00:06:14,781 Fine. We'll try it your way. 125 00:06:14,805 --> 00:06:16,523 But this next month 126 00:06:16,547 --> 00:06:19,486 is gonna be like boot camp for these guys. 127 00:06:19,510 --> 00:06:22,058 They are going to be cleaning out the gutters, 128 00:06:22,082 --> 00:06:24,090 taking out the trash, mowing the lawns. 129 00:06:24,114 --> 00:06:26,101 Wait a second. Those are your chores. 130 00:06:26,125 --> 00:06:29,035 No time to talk. Dinner shift's starting. 131 00:06:30,961 --> 00:06:33,400 Okay, this is the place. 132 00:06:33,424 --> 00:06:35,751 Oh, here, let me throw that away for you. 133 00:06:35,775 --> 00:06:38,445 No, I'm not finished with it. 134 00:06:38,469 --> 00:06:39,946 It's a lamaze class. 135 00:06:39,970 --> 00:06:42,949 I guarantee you I will not be the only woman in there 136 00:06:42,973 --> 00:06:44,820 holding a Chimichanga. 137 00:06:44,844 --> 00:06:47,153 Wow. It's all couples. 138 00:06:47,177 --> 00:06:50,557 I wish Mike didn't have that rehab thing tonight. 139 00:06:50,581 --> 00:06:52,489 Do you want me to stay? I can skip the movie. 140 00:06:52,513 --> 00:06:55,562 Oh, no, that's okay. I'll be fine. 141 00:06:55,586 --> 00:06:57,586 Okay. Have fun. 142 00:07:10,901 --> 00:07:13,131 Quit eyeing it. I ain't sharing. 143 00:07:15,035 --> 00:07:17,544 Okay, don't talk. Just listen. 144 00:07:17,568 --> 00:07:19,546 Remember last year when I brought up 145 00:07:19,570 --> 00:07:22,519 dad's new girlfriend, and you said you never wanted 146 00:07:22,543 --> 00:07:25,430 to hear another word about one of his skanks again? Yeah. 147 00:07:25,454 --> 00:07:28,525 Okay, well, I just spotted them in the hallway, 148 00:07:28,549 --> 00:07:31,157 and there's something you should know. 149 00:07:31,181 --> 00:07:34,100 Oh... my god. 150 00:07:34,124 --> 00:07:37,538 Okay, you're all caught up. He got his skank pregnant, and you didn't tell me? 151 00:07:37,562 --> 00:07:40,537 I tried, remember? I said, "dad and Marisa are about to..." 152 00:07:40,561 --> 00:07:42,509 And then you stopped me, and then you said, 153 00:07:42,533 --> 00:07:46,573 "talk to the hand," and I said, "no one says that anymore"... okay, I get it. 154 00:07:46,597 --> 00:07:48,014 One more thing. They're married. See ya. 155 00:07:48,038 --> 00:07:51,578 Susie Q.! What a small world! 156 00:07:51,602 --> 00:07:53,449 Look how fat you are. 157 00:07:53,473 --> 00:07:55,922 Hello, Karl. 158 00:07:55,946 --> 00:07:58,985 Marisa, this is Susan, my ex-wife. 159 00:07:59,009 --> 00:08:03,760 Hello. It's so nice to finally meet... you. 160 00:08:03,784 --> 00:08:06,901 Honey, i-I'm gonna go sign us in and get us a couple mats. 161 00:08:06,925 --> 00:08:09,636 Okay. 162 00:08:09,660 --> 00:08:11,638 Can you believe this? 163 00:08:11,662 --> 00:08:14,509 What are the chances we'd end up having more kids, huh? 164 00:08:14,533 --> 00:08:17,043 Especially you. What does that mean? 165 00:08:17,067 --> 00:08:19,776 I'm just saying, most eggs your age don't take. 166 00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:21,477 Power to you. 167 00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:23,780 Okay, clearly, this is not going to work. 168 00:08:23,804 --> 00:08:26,021 So why don't you take your child bride 169 00:08:26,045 --> 00:08:28,014 and find another class? 170 00:08:28,038 --> 00:08:31,017 I know. She's young. Makes you wanna have work done, huh? 171 00:08:31,041 --> 00:08:34,691 Or should I say, more work done? The only work I've had done 172 00:08:34,715 --> 00:08:37,724 was getting 185 pounds of ugly fat sucked out of my house. 173 00:08:37,748 --> 00:08:39,726 You're jealous. I get it. 174 00:08:39,750 --> 00:08:42,028 She's gorgeous, funny, a law professor. 175 00:08:42,052 --> 00:08:46,533 Oh, no, no, no, th-those are not the legs of a law professor. 176 00:08:46,557 --> 00:08:48,535 Not that she needs to work. 177 00:08:48,559 --> 00:08:50,537 I just made partner at my firm. Thanks. 178 00:08:50,561 --> 00:08:52,879 I keep telling her, "slow down." 179 00:08:52,903 --> 00:08:55,241 "If you need something to do, 180 00:08:55,265 --> 00:08:58,815 why not oversee the remodel of our new ski chalet?" 181 00:08:58,839 --> 00:09:02,048 Well, I better get back to Marisa. 182 00:09:02,072 --> 00:09:04,782 And by the way, you're dripping. 183 00:09:16,657 --> 00:09:18,164 Bye, mom. I'm leaving. 184 00:09:18,188 --> 00:09:20,006 Be home by 10:00. 185 00:09:20,030 --> 00:09:22,008 10:00? But it's almost 8:00 now. 186 00:09:22,032 --> 00:09:25,311 Yes, and it's also a school night. 187 00:09:25,335 --> 00:09:27,313 Fine. Introduce me to this boy, 188 00:09:27,337 --> 00:09:30,947 and we'll talk about making your curfew later. 189 00:09:30,971 --> 00:09:32,949 Yeah, maybe some other night. 190 00:09:32,973 --> 00:09:35,922 Sweetie, I'm gonna have to meet him eventually. 191 00:09:35,946 --> 00:09:39,085 It's just... I don't even know if I like him yet. 192 00:09:39,109 --> 00:09:42,158 When I do, you can meet him. 193 00:09:42,182 --> 00:09:44,290 I'll be home by 10:00. 194 00:09:47,618 --> 00:09:49,996 Hey, dad. 195 00:09:50,020 --> 00:09:51,297 Hey, Princess. 196 00:09:51,321 --> 00:09:53,021 Let's go. I'm starving. 197 00:09:56,627 --> 00:09:59,906 Honey, I can't find my nail file. Have you seen it? 198 00:09:59,930 --> 00:10:01,978 Is that some kind of joke? 199 00:10:02,002 --> 00:10:05,351 Oh, right. I keep forgetting you're useless. 200 00:10:05,375 --> 00:10:08,135 I'm gonna see if Ellie has one. 201 00:10:11,211 --> 00:10:13,189 Hey, Ellie, you got a sec? 202 00:10:13,213 --> 00:10:14,691 Be right there. 203 00:10:16,216 --> 00:10:18,194 Hey, what's up? 204 00:10:18,218 --> 00:10:20,967 Hey, um... Oh, I'm sorry. 205 00:10:20,991 --> 00:10:22,991 I didn't know you were... entertaining. 206 00:10:24,655 --> 00:10:26,703 Hi. I'm Gaby Solis. 207 00:10:26,727 --> 00:10:28,174 Hey. 208 00:10:28,198 --> 00:10:30,176 Um, so what do you need? 209 00:10:30,200 --> 00:10:32,178 Oh, you know what? It can wait. 210 00:10:32,202 --> 00:10:34,302 I'll see you in the morning. 211 00:10:40,270 --> 00:10:42,248 Okay, that was weird. 212 00:10:42,272 --> 00:10:43,820 What? 213 00:10:43,844 --> 00:10:47,824 Earlier tonight, I saw a guy coming out of Ellie's room, 214 00:10:47,848 --> 00:10:49,826 so I assumed it was her boyfriend, 215 00:10:49,850 --> 00:10:52,659 but just now I caught her in there with another guy. 216 00:10:52,683 --> 00:10:55,702 Okay. So we have two tramps living in our house. 217 00:10:55,726 --> 00:10:58,304 That was for the "useless" comment, wasn't it? 218 00:10:58,328 --> 00:11:02,238 Mm-hmm. And it felt good. 219 00:11:04,134 --> 00:11:06,813 Oh, it sounds like he's leaving. 220 00:11:06,837 --> 00:11:08,815 I hope it's not 'cause of me. 221 00:11:08,839 --> 00:11:09,816 Mm. 222 00:11:09,840 --> 00:11:12,140 Maybe I should go apologize. 223 00:11:26,917 --> 00:11:29,195 Okay, there may be two tramps in this house, 224 00:11:29,219 --> 00:11:31,919 but only one of 'em is getting paid. 225 00:11:35,704 --> 00:11:37,343 Hey, Lynette. 226 00:11:37,367 --> 00:11:39,806 Ida's cat got out again. You haven't seen him, have ya? 227 00:11:39,830 --> 00:11:42,108 No, sorry. I hope you find him. 228 00:11:42,132 --> 00:11:45,116 Well, if he's anything like Ida, he'll wander into my house drunk 229 00:11:45,140 --> 00:11:47,353 the next time "guiding light" is on. 230 00:11:49,079 --> 00:11:52,179 Wait. Hold on. I have to fix this. 231 00:11:54,845 --> 00:11:57,323 This is so unfair. 232 00:11:57,347 --> 00:11:59,195 Yeah, I know. I hate her. 233 00:11:59,219 --> 00:12:01,267 How come she's not in trouble? 234 00:12:01,291 --> 00:12:04,270 Because we started the fire, you idiot, 235 00:12:04,294 --> 00:12:06,272 so now we have to be punished. 236 00:12:06,296 --> 00:12:09,496 I know, but it was her idea! Boys? 237 00:12:11,231 --> 00:12:13,201 Who are you talking about? 238 00:12:18,839 --> 00:12:20,316 Kayla? 239 00:12:20,340 --> 00:12:22,218 Can I speak to you for a second? 240 00:12:22,242 --> 00:12:24,190 I guess. 241 00:12:24,214 --> 00:12:26,192 I need to ask you something, 242 00:12:26,216 --> 00:12:30,456 and I want you to tell me the truth, okay? 243 00:12:30,480 --> 00:12:32,458 Did you have anything to do 244 00:12:32,482 --> 00:12:35,161 with the fire at Rick's restaurant? 245 00:12:35,185 --> 00:12:37,363 Did someone say I did? 246 00:12:37,387 --> 00:12:40,227 I'm looking for a "yes" or "no" answer here. 247 00:12:41,892 --> 00:12:44,240 I didn't start the fire. 248 00:12:44,264 --> 00:12:47,774 No, the twins did, but they say it was your idea. 249 00:12:47,798 --> 00:12:49,776 It was a joke. 250 00:12:49,800 --> 00:12:52,278 I didn't think they'd actually do it. 251 00:12:52,302 --> 00:12:54,851 Kayla... 252 00:12:54,875 --> 00:12:58,124 Why would you even joke about something like that? 253 00:12:58,148 --> 00:13:00,126 We heard you and daddy talking 254 00:13:00,150 --> 00:13:02,859 about how Rick wanted to take you away. 255 00:13:02,883 --> 00:13:05,370 Porter was so mad. He wanted to blow Rick up. 256 00:13:05,394 --> 00:13:07,994 Preston told him he could use dynamite. 257 00:13:08,018 --> 00:13:09,996 I told them that was stupid. 258 00:13:10,020 --> 00:13:12,098 No one has dynamite in their house. 259 00:13:12,122 --> 00:13:16,002 But everyone has matches. 260 00:13:16,026 --> 00:13:18,304 Do you have any idea what you've done? 261 00:13:18,328 --> 00:13:20,847 Someone could have been killed. 262 00:13:20,871 --> 00:13:22,278 But they weren't. 263 00:13:22,302 --> 00:13:24,050 But it doesn't matter! 264 00:13:24,074 --> 00:13:28,815 Intentionally setting a fire is a very serious crime. 265 00:13:28,839 --> 00:13:31,057 Don't you get that? 266 00:13:31,081 --> 00:13:32,388 I do. 267 00:13:32,412 --> 00:13:35,429 That's why I think it's good you're punishing the twins. 268 00:13:35,453 --> 00:13:37,393 They're really bad kids, 269 00:13:37,417 --> 00:13:40,347 and they need to learn. 270 00:13:58,608 --> 00:14:00,917 I told you we'd be overdressed. 271 00:14:00,941 --> 00:14:02,919 There's nothing wrong with that. 272 00:14:02,943 --> 00:14:04,926 It shows our respect for lamaze, 273 00:14:04,950 --> 00:14:07,615 and, you know, the whole birthing process. 274 00:14:08,949 --> 00:14:11,597 Orit's that your ex-husband's here. 275 00:14:11,621 --> 00:14:14,100 Karl? Is he here? Oh, what a freakish... 276 00:14:14,124 --> 00:14:16,607 Don't even bother. Why didn't you just tell me? 277 00:14:16,631 --> 00:14:19,405 'Cause I knew you'd make us switch to another class. 278 00:14:19,429 --> 00:14:21,407 Last time I was here, 279 00:14:21,431 --> 00:14:23,910 Karl kept throwing his perfect life in my face, 280 00:14:23,934 --> 00:14:25,917 and I just wanted to come back here 281 00:14:25,941 --> 00:14:28,975 and show him that we were doing well, too. Hence the sport coat. 282 00:14:28,999 --> 00:14:30,276 "Hence." that's classy. 283 00:14:30,300 --> 00:14:32,548 Say a lot of "hence" when we see him. 284 00:14:32,572 --> 00:14:35,421 Susan, I'm not gonna lie about who I am. 285 00:14:35,445 --> 00:14:38,084 I'm not asking you to lie. I'm just saying spin. 286 00:14:38,108 --> 00:14:40,086 Why won't you spin? I don't know. 287 00:14:40,110 --> 00:14:43,450 Hey, plumber! Somebody clog a toilet? 288 00:14:45,055 --> 00:14:46,963 I'm in. 289 00:14:46,987 --> 00:14:48,264 Hey, guys. 290 00:14:48,288 --> 00:14:49,936 Mike, you remember Karl? 291 00:14:49,960 --> 00:14:53,299 And this is Karl's wife Marisa. Hello. 292 00:14:53,323 --> 00:14:55,071 So how's things going? 293 00:14:55,095 --> 00:14:57,373 You still spending most of your time 294 00:14:57,397 --> 00:14:59,375 with your head under a sink? 295 00:14:59,399 --> 00:15:01,377 Actually, I hired a couple of guys, 296 00:15:01,401 --> 00:15:03,379 and they do all the work. 297 00:15:03,403 --> 00:15:06,082 I just sit back and cash the checks, 298 00:15:06,106 --> 00:15:07,553 hence the sport coat. 299 00:15:07,577 --> 00:15:10,356 Yeah, you guys look fantastic. I feel like such a slob. 300 00:15:10,380 --> 00:15:12,358 Kind of overdressed, aren't you? 301 00:15:12,382 --> 00:15:15,491 Well, after this, we have a big party to go to. 302 00:15:15,515 --> 00:15:18,024 Yeah, our social life is just crazy these days. 303 00:15:18,048 --> 00:15:21,067 Seems like every night we have some fancy party. Just bananas. 304 00:15:21,091 --> 00:15:23,099 Why don't you ever take me out? 305 00:15:23,123 --> 00:15:25,201 Hey, at least I didn't ditch you 306 00:15:25,225 --> 00:15:28,134 on the first day of lamaze class. 307 00:15:28,158 --> 00:15:31,337 I didn't ditch Susan. I was getting my 30-day chip. 308 00:15:31,361 --> 00:15:34,280 What, you're like an alkie? 309 00:15:34,304 --> 00:15:36,682 Drugs, actually. Prescription drugs. 310 00:15:36,706 --> 00:15:38,684 But I went through rehab, 311 00:15:38,708 --> 00:15:41,347 and I'm clean now. 312 00:15:41,371 --> 00:15:43,519 Wow. Congratulations. 313 00:15:43,543 --> 00:15:46,953 Okay, people, time to get started. Take your seats. 314 00:15:49,119 --> 00:15:51,597 So your hubby's been in rehab? 315 00:15:51,621 --> 00:15:53,421 That's just bananas. 316 00:15:57,157 --> 00:15:59,105 Wow. 317 00:15:59,129 --> 00:16:00,436 I know. 318 00:16:00,460 --> 00:16:03,439 Turns out the whole thing was Kayla's idea. 319 00:16:03,463 --> 00:16:05,450 Well, I guess Porter and Preston have 320 00:16:05,474 --> 00:16:07,443 a new dishwashing buddy, huh? 321 00:16:07,467 --> 00:16:09,175 Mm, no. 322 00:16:09,199 --> 00:16:11,477 I think it goes a little further than that. 323 00:16:11,501 --> 00:16:13,179 I think we have 324 00:16:13,203 --> 00:16:16,152 a seriously troubled young girl. 325 00:16:16,176 --> 00:16:20,456 She needs... Professional help. 326 00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:21,988 Like therapy? 327 00:16:22,012 --> 00:16:24,060 You brought it up before, and in this case, 328 00:16:24,084 --> 00:16:26,467 I really don't think we have a choice. 329 00:16:26,491 --> 00:16:28,464 Interesting. So the boys, who actually 330 00:16:28,488 --> 00:16:31,037 physically set the fire... They don't need therapy, 331 00:16:31,061 --> 00:16:33,339 but Kayla, who only talked about it... she does? 332 00:16:33,363 --> 00:16:35,746 You didn't see her. She just sat there, 333 00:16:35,770 --> 00:16:38,744 playing with her doll with this kind of eerie calm. 334 00:16:38,768 --> 00:16:42,548 Oh, she was calm. Yeah, better nip that in the bud. 335 00:16:42,572 --> 00:16:45,081 No, you're missing my point. 336 00:16:45,105 --> 00:16:47,083 No, I get your point. 337 00:16:47,107 --> 00:16:49,085 There are different rules for my kid 338 00:16:49,109 --> 00:16:51,087 than there are for yours. 339 00:16:51,111 --> 00:16:53,219 Well... yeah. 340 00:16:53,243 --> 00:16:56,100 Think of what that poor girl has been through. 341 00:16:56,124 --> 00:16:59,395 And on top of that... 342 00:16:59,419 --> 00:17:02,128 Her mom was kind of a psycho. 343 00:17:02,152 --> 00:17:06,632 Okay, you are saying that Kayla is a psycho now. 344 00:17:06,656 --> 00:17:11,607 I am just saying, apple... tree. 345 00:17:11,631 --> 00:17:13,609 Maybe not so far. 346 00:17:13,633 --> 00:17:16,582 And I'm just saying, my daughter is fine. 347 00:17:16,606 --> 00:17:18,406 No therapy. 348 00:17:32,722 --> 00:17:35,030 Orson, what are you doing here? 349 00:17:35,054 --> 00:17:38,138 Bree, it's so good to see you. I have been doing some thinking. 350 00:17:38,162 --> 00:17:40,436 Yes, I can smell the thinking on your breath. 351 00:17:40,460 --> 00:17:43,038 Are you insane, driving in this condition? 352 00:17:43,062 --> 00:17:45,349 No, I didn't. I arrived sober, and I drank while I waited. 353 00:17:45,373 --> 00:17:47,273 I am a law-abiding man. 354 00:17:47,297 --> 00:17:50,176 Except for the occasional hit-and-run. 355 00:17:50,200 --> 00:17:53,119 Ah, the incident. That's what I'm here to talk about. 356 00:17:53,143 --> 00:17:55,781 I am prepared to meet your condition 357 00:17:55,805 --> 00:17:57,783 and go to the police. 358 00:17:57,807 --> 00:18:00,186 You are? 359 00:18:00,210 --> 00:18:02,688 Yes, I have it all figured out. 360 00:18:02,712 --> 00:18:05,199 The key is the sleepwalking. Susan saw it. 361 00:18:05,223 --> 00:18:07,633 We'll find a psychiatrist to testify 362 00:18:07,657 --> 00:18:11,167 that I was sleepwalking when I drove the car. 363 00:18:11,191 --> 00:18:13,369 It's brilliant! No, it's a pathetic fantasy 364 00:18:13,393 --> 00:18:16,142 fueled by cowardice and amaretto sours. 365 00:18:16,166 --> 00:18:19,105 You committed a crime, Orson. Face it. 366 00:18:19,129 --> 00:18:22,399 Bree, I just want to come home. Please! 367 00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:27,313 Hey! I'm glad you two are patching things up, 368 00:18:27,337 --> 00:18:29,785 but take the makeup sex inside. 369 00:18:29,809 --> 00:18:31,787 Edie, would you do me a favor 370 00:18:31,811 --> 00:18:33,789 and take Orson back to his apartment? 371 00:18:33,813 --> 00:18:37,623 I have to let my sitter go home. Uh, all right. Hop in. 372 00:18:37,647 --> 00:18:40,796 Oh, no, please. Don't make me go back there. 373 00:18:40,820 --> 00:18:44,630 The other divorced men are trying to start a book club. 374 00:18:44,654 --> 00:18:46,332 Oh, for god sakes. 375 00:18:46,356 --> 00:18:48,604 You can sleep it off on my couch tonight. 376 00:18:48,628 --> 00:18:51,607 Now hitch up your skirt and get in. 377 00:18:51,631 --> 00:18:54,361 Yeah. Yeah. 378 00:18:56,366 --> 00:18:58,644 There have been men coming out of her room 379 00:18:58,668 --> 00:19:00,646 at all hours of the night, 380 00:19:00,670 --> 00:19:02,648 and I saw her counting a wad of cash. 381 00:19:02,672 --> 00:19:04,350 So long story short, 382 00:19:04,374 --> 00:19:07,361 I need your help to get that hooker out of my house. 383 00:19:07,385 --> 00:19:09,355 What do you want us to do? 384 00:19:09,379 --> 00:19:11,357 Well, I've got no solid evidence, 385 00:19:11,381 --> 00:19:13,128 and she's got a lease. 386 00:19:13,152 --> 00:19:16,139 So, Bob, I was hoping you could "solicit" her services. 387 00:19:16,163 --> 00:19:18,133 That way I'll have proof. 388 00:19:18,157 --> 00:19:21,237 You do know I'm gay, right? 389 00:19:21,261 --> 00:19:23,539 Exactly. You people are theatrical, and I need 390 00:19:23,563 --> 00:19:26,680 someone I can count on to give a decent performance. 391 00:19:26,704 --> 00:19:29,366 I don't know. I'll do it. 392 00:19:31,601 --> 00:19:33,279 What? 393 00:19:33,303 --> 00:19:34,580 Well, no offense. 394 00:19:34,604 --> 00:19:37,691 I just think Bob has a better shot at pulling it off. 395 00:19:37,715 --> 00:19:39,555 He's a little more... 396 00:19:39,579 --> 00:19:42,228 Butch. I know. 397 00:19:42,252 --> 00:19:43,589 You hear that, honey? 398 00:19:43,613 --> 00:19:46,597 Please, the only way you'd be convincing as a straight guy 399 00:19:46,621 --> 00:19:49,335 is if you died and came back as a straight guy. 400 00:19:49,359 --> 00:19:53,239 I'm sorry. Who went to their senior prom with a girl? 401 00:19:53,263 --> 00:19:55,371 Yeah, Suzy sellers, gay maker. 402 00:19:55,395 --> 00:19:57,703 If you're looking for butch, you should know 403 00:19:57,727 --> 00:20:00,376 that I played Tony in "West Side story" 404 00:20:00,400 --> 00:20:01,877 to rave reviews. 405 00:20:01,901 --> 00:20:03,879 He also made out with officer Krupke 406 00:20:03,903 --> 00:20:05,951 during intermission. 407 00:20:05,975 --> 00:20:09,785 Well, I really don't care who does it. 408 00:20:09,809 --> 00:20:11,887 Just get it done. 409 00:20:11,911 --> 00:20:15,351 And... don't wear that. 410 00:20:19,619 --> 00:20:21,927 Ugh. Never watch a c-section film 411 00:20:21,951 --> 00:20:24,851 if you had a calzone for lunch. 412 00:20:27,657 --> 00:20:29,457 Everything okay? 413 00:20:30,730 --> 00:20:33,409 Did you have to tell Karl about rehab? 414 00:20:33,433 --> 00:20:36,417 You said I didn't have to lie. Yeah, but that doesn't mean 415 00:20:36,441 --> 00:20:39,445 you have to go blurting all our deepest, darkest secrets. 416 00:20:39,469 --> 00:20:41,447 It's not dark. It's part of who I am. 417 00:20:41,471 --> 00:20:44,450 Plus one of the first things they teach you in the program is 418 00:20:44,474 --> 00:20:47,301 it's not healthy to keep secrets. Hence, the honesty. 419 00:20:47,325 --> 00:20:49,855 Oh, enough with the "hence." 420 00:20:49,879 --> 00:20:52,358 I'm just saying that some things are private, 421 00:20:52,382 --> 00:20:54,430 and I think that you can be honest 422 00:20:54,454 --> 00:20:55,937 without being inappropriate. 423 00:20:55,961 --> 00:20:58,564 When I said it, his wife congratulated me. 424 00:20:58,588 --> 00:21:00,266 Did you notice that? 425 00:21:00,290 --> 00:21:02,308 And Karl made his happy monkey face. 426 00:21:02,332 --> 00:21:03,609 Did you notice that? 427 00:21:03,633 --> 00:21:05,311 You know what, Susan? 428 00:21:05,335 --> 00:21:07,443 This reminds me of the battle I have to fight 429 00:21:07,467 --> 00:21:09,945 every day for the rest of my life. 430 00:21:09,969 --> 00:21:12,518 That's what's important to me. 431 00:21:12,542 --> 00:21:16,512 I don't give a rat's ass what your ex-husband thinks. 432 00:21:25,855 --> 00:21:27,833 This isn't Dr. Kagen's office. 433 00:21:27,857 --> 00:21:30,336 Well, actually, this is a different kind of doctor. 434 00:21:30,360 --> 00:21:33,469 You know, the kind you can talk to? 435 00:21:33,493 --> 00:21:36,477 You brought me to a shrink? Well, I thought you might like 436 00:21:36,501 --> 00:21:39,475 to have a safe place where you could share your feelings. 437 00:21:39,499 --> 00:21:41,276 You know? 438 00:21:41,300 --> 00:21:43,809 With your mom's death and moving in with us, 439 00:21:43,833 --> 00:21:45,811 you've been through a lot. 440 00:21:45,835 --> 00:21:48,514 That was a long time ago. I'm fine. 441 00:21:48,538 --> 00:21:49,815 Well, good, 442 00:21:49,839 --> 00:21:53,859 but sometimes when you go through hard things, 443 00:21:53,883 --> 00:21:55,891 it changes the way you think. 444 00:21:55,915 --> 00:21:58,794 Maybe we have trouble telling the difference 445 00:21:58,818 --> 00:22:02,368 between what's right and what's wrong. 446 00:22:02,392 --> 00:22:05,000 I don't have any trouble with that. 447 00:22:05,024 --> 00:22:07,307 Actually, you do. That's why you're here. 448 00:22:07,331 --> 00:22:10,326 So let's just wait and talk to the doctor, okay? 449 00:22:16,906 --> 00:22:19,785 You know what, Lynette? Hmm? 450 00:22:19,809 --> 00:22:21,787 Maybe i should talk to the doctor 451 00:22:21,811 --> 00:22:23,489 about right and wrong. 452 00:22:23,513 --> 00:22:25,391 Good. 453 00:22:25,415 --> 00:22:27,993 Then maybe I should talk to the police. 454 00:22:28,017 --> 00:22:32,097 What? No. Sweetie, we don't need to do that. 455 00:22:32,121 --> 00:22:34,430 Really? 'Cause what the twins did is a crime. 456 00:22:34,454 --> 00:22:37,833 I mean, like you said, someone could've been killed. 457 00:22:37,857 --> 00:22:41,407 So if we don't go to the police, wouldn't that be wrong? 458 00:22:41,431 --> 00:22:43,909 You don't understand. 459 00:22:43,933 --> 00:22:45,571 No, I do. 460 00:22:45,595 --> 00:22:49,745 If i have to talk to the shrink, i have to talk to the cops. 461 00:22:51,701 --> 00:22:56,051 Hi. You must be Kayla. I'm all ready for you. 462 00:22:56,075 --> 00:22:58,584 Actually, I think we're okay. 463 00:22:58,608 --> 00:23:01,657 We... resolved our problems 464 00:23:01,681 --> 00:23:03,659 just sitting in your waiting room. 465 00:23:03,683 --> 00:23:06,392 Boy, you're good. 466 00:23:06,416 --> 00:23:09,656 Ahem. 'Kay. So we're gonna go. 467 00:23:16,466 --> 00:23:19,004 Target in place. We're a go. 468 00:23:19,028 --> 00:23:20,598 He's coming out. 469 00:23:25,605 --> 00:23:28,454 What is he wearing? 470 00:23:28,478 --> 00:23:32,157 He looks like the lost member of wham! 471 00:23:32,181 --> 00:23:34,660 He thinks the outfit makes him look straight. 472 00:23:34,684 --> 00:23:37,871 Just be thankful I got the toothpick out of his mouth. 473 00:23:40,850 --> 00:23:43,529 Must he put his hand on his hip like that? 474 00:23:43,553 --> 00:23:45,531 Butch up, for god sakes! 475 00:23:45,555 --> 00:23:47,633 What?! What do you think I am? 476 00:23:47,657 --> 00:23:48,974 Uh-oh. 477 00:23:48,998 --> 00:23:50,836 What?! Ohh! 478 00:23:50,860 --> 00:23:54,079 Oh, crap! Abort! Abort! 479 00:23:54,103 --> 00:23:57,550 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. You are a pig, and I'm gonna kick your ass. 480 00:23:57,574 --> 00:23:59,645 Ohh! Ellie, what are you doing? 481 00:23:59,669 --> 00:24:01,647 Your creepy neighbor... He came over here 482 00:24:01,671 --> 00:24:05,728 and offered me money to sleep with him. Gaby, tell her. 483 00:24:05,752 --> 00:24:07,893 Tell me what? 484 00:24:07,917 --> 00:24:10,496 Uh, he did the same thing to me. 485 00:24:10,520 --> 00:24:12,157 Perv! Ohh! 486 00:24:12,181 --> 00:24:16,462 Hey, that's enough. Gaby, tell her, or I will. 487 00:24:16,486 --> 00:24:18,003 What's going on? 488 00:24:18,027 --> 00:24:21,667 Here's the thing. 489 00:24:21,691 --> 00:24:23,709 I thought you were a hooker. 490 00:24:23,733 --> 00:24:28,674 So I had Lee proposition you so I could catch you in the act. 491 00:24:28,698 --> 00:24:30,976 But guess what? You passed the test. Yay! 492 00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:33,970 Everybody inside for margaritas. 493 00:24:38,878 --> 00:24:41,126 Ellie, wait. I made a mistake. 494 00:24:41,150 --> 00:24:43,989 Can we please talk about this? 495 00:24:44,013 --> 00:24:47,533 Dude, you just told your neighbors that I'm a whore. 496 00:24:47,557 --> 00:24:49,535 Look at it from my point of view. 497 00:24:49,559 --> 00:24:52,538 You're an attractive woman. Guys are coming and going. 498 00:24:52,562 --> 00:24:55,501 I saw you take money from one of 'em. 499 00:24:55,525 --> 00:24:57,903 What am I supposed to think? 500 00:24:57,927 --> 00:25:02,827 All right. You might as well know. 501 00:25:04,534 --> 00:25:06,652 I do tattoos. 502 00:25:06,676 --> 00:25:08,213 You do what? 503 00:25:08,237 --> 00:25:09,585 See, I've been working downtown, 504 00:25:09,609 --> 00:25:14,760 and I have this jerk of a boss who takes 70% of my money. 505 00:25:14,784 --> 00:25:17,563 So I'm trying to earn enough cash 506 00:25:17,587 --> 00:25:19,565 to finally open my own shop. 507 00:25:19,589 --> 00:25:23,128 You've been running a tattoo parlor out of my house? 508 00:25:23,152 --> 00:25:26,632 I know. I'm sorry I lied. 509 00:25:26,656 --> 00:25:28,634 I'll be gone in the morning. 510 00:25:28,658 --> 00:25:30,806 Okay, Ellie, wait. 511 00:25:30,830 --> 00:25:32,708 You don't have to go. Are you sure? 512 00:25:32,732 --> 00:25:35,789 Because I have to keep doing my work to pay for school. 513 00:25:35,813 --> 00:25:39,615 Well, I suppose I could look the other way for a few months. 514 00:25:39,639 --> 00:25:42,918 It's the least I could do for thinking you're a whore. 515 00:25:42,942 --> 00:25:45,651 Forgive me? 516 00:25:45,675 --> 00:25:47,245 Of course. 517 00:26:10,840 --> 00:26:12,578 Oh, hi. 518 00:26:12,602 --> 00:26:15,586 Hi, Edie. Thanks again for helping me out last night. 519 00:26:15,610 --> 00:26:16,722 Oh, no problem. 520 00:26:16,746 --> 00:26:18,724 Orson's car is still parked at my house. 521 00:26:18,748 --> 00:26:21,627 Um, did he mention when he'd be coming back to pick it up? 522 00:26:21,651 --> 00:26:25,891 Well, why don't you ask him yourself? He's in the shower. 523 00:26:25,915 --> 00:26:27,893 He spent the night here? 524 00:26:27,917 --> 00:26:30,666 Apparently, he's not a big fan of Fairview towers, 525 00:26:30,690 --> 00:26:33,869 and he was so drunk and whiny, I just let him ride my couch. 526 00:26:33,893 --> 00:26:37,803 Well, um, just so you know, in the future, 527 00:26:37,827 --> 00:26:41,947 I'm not comfortable with that. This can't happen again. 528 00:26:41,971 --> 00:26:43,578 Bree... 529 00:26:43,602 --> 00:26:45,580 What are you getting at? 530 00:26:45,604 --> 00:26:47,161 Oh, I-I-I think you know. 531 00:26:47,185 --> 00:26:49,154 Tell me anyway, 532 00:26:49,178 --> 00:26:52,087 just in case you're not saying I'm a big slut. 533 00:26:52,111 --> 00:26:54,089 Oh, come on, Edie. 534 00:26:54,113 --> 00:26:56,161 You know, Carlos, Mike, Karl... 535 00:26:56,185 --> 00:26:59,164 You do have a way at picking at other women's leftovers. 536 00:26:59,188 --> 00:27:01,867 First of all, I am not attracted to Orson. 537 00:27:01,891 --> 00:27:04,770 I mean, that would be like having sex with PBS. 538 00:27:04,794 --> 00:27:07,681 And second, just because I don't like your attitude, 539 00:27:07,705 --> 00:27:11,006 I'm gonna let him stay as long as he wants. Edie! 540 00:27:11,030 --> 00:27:14,139 Days, weeks... might even let him hang my Christmas lights. 541 00:27:14,163 --> 00:27:16,873 Come on, Edie. Think of our friendship. 542 00:27:26,315 --> 00:27:28,293 How'd you expect me to react, Lynette? 543 00:27:28,317 --> 00:27:30,996 You took her to therapy behind my back. 544 00:27:31,020 --> 00:27:33,298 And I wouldn't have done that unless I thought 545 00:27:33,322 --> 00:27:36,236 we had a serious problem, which we do. Why, because she threatened you? 546 00:27:36,260 --> 00:27:38,734 Of course she did. You ambushed her. Tom, it is one thing 547 00:27:38,758 --> 00:27:41,366 not to want to admit something's wrong with your kid. 548 00:27:41,390 --> 00:27:44,069 It's another to just Bury your head in the sand. 549 00:27:44,093 --> 00:27:46,380 Who's burying their head in the sand? You are. There are opportunities that you can see that... 550 00:27:46,404 --> 00:27:50,015 No, no, no, no, you're distorting reality. I'm not! What would be my agenda? 551 00:27:50,039 --> 00:27:52,939 You can't pull the crap like this. 552 00:28:03,252 --> 00:28:05,660 Whoa! 553 00:28:05,684 --> 00:28:07,292 What are you doing? 554 00:28:07,316 --> 00:28:09,695 I jumped off the roof. It was awesome. 555 00:28:09,719 --> 00:28:11,136 No way. 556 00:28:11,160 --> 00:28:14,870 Yeah. It was just like a parachute. You wanna try it? 557 00:28:14,894 --> 00:28:17,302 But maybe it won't work. 558 00:28:17,326 --> 00:28:19,304 It will. I just did it. 559 00:28:19,328 --> 00:28:22,407 If you want, I can show you. 560 00:28:22,431 --> 00:28:25,280 Oh, wait. You're in trouble. 561 00:28:25,304 --> 00:28:27,014 You can't. 562 00:28:28,707 --> 00:28:30,407 Never mind. 563 00:28:38,387 --> 00:28:41,066 Your head in the sand. No. You're burying your head in the sand. 564 00:28:41,090 --> 00:28:44,369 It is different. No, because you're distorting reality. There are so many opportunities that you could look and see 565 00:28:44,393 --> 00:28:47,008 what's going on. I am not! But you can't pull crap like this, Lynette. 566 00:28:47,032 --> 00:28:49,304 Either you treat Kayla like she's your own kid... come on. I do. 567 00:28:49,328 --> 00:28:51,376 Aah! 568 00:28:51,400 --> 00:28:53,378 Mom! 569 00:28:53,402 --> 00:28:54,880 Ow! Ow, ow, ow, ow! 570 00:28:54,904 --> 00:28:57,382 Oh, my god! Oh, my god! What happened? 571 00:28:57,406 --> 00:28:59,144 Is he okay? 572 00:28:59,168 --> 00:29:02,387 Porter, get down off that roof! Get up. Up. 573 00:29:02,411 --> 00:29:04,419 Ow! It hurts. Oh, we gotta take him to the hospital. 574 00:29:04,443 --> 00:29:07,427 Okay, you stay here. You take care of the kids. Okay. 575 00:29:07,451 --> 00:29:10,055 I will take him to the hospital. All right. 576 00:29:10,079 --> 00:29:12,758 No, you... you both go. I got the kids. Go, go, go, go. Thanks, Karen. Come here, buddy. 577 00:29:12,782 --> 00:29:15,460 There. It's okay, sweetie. You're gonna be just fine. 578 00:29:16,986 --> 00:29:18,486 There. 579 00:29:34,773 --> 00:29:36,321 Hey, Susie. 580 00:29:36,345 --> 00:29:38,153 Where's the plumber? 581 00:29:38,177 --> 00:29:41,426 Fishing a wedding ring out of some housewife's grease trap? 582 00:29:41,450 --> 00:29:43,758 He's not feeling well. 583 00:29:43,782 --> 00:29:46,091 I see Marisa isn't here either. 584 00:29:46,115 --> 00:29:48,794 Yeah, she got stuck at her book signing. 585 00:29:48,818 --> 00:29:50,796 She writes books, like you, 586 00:29:50,820 --> 00:29:54,199 only hers are for grown-ups and they sell. 587 00:29:54,223 --> 00:29:57,172 Okay, Karl, you win. You happy? 588 00:29:57,196 --> 00:30:00,505 Whoa. What's this about? 589 00:30:00,529 --> 00:30:03,408 Just drop the act. You are so loving this. 590 00:30:03,432 --> 00:30:05,110 You ended up 591 00:30:05,134 --> 00:30:07,457 with the miss America with a law degree, 592 00:30:07,481 --> 00:30:10,085 and I ended up with the pillhead plumber. 593 00:30:10,109 --> 00:30:11,286 Bravo. 594 00:30:11,310 --> 00:30:14,319 Oh! Damn it! Why won't this unroll? 595 00:30:14,343 --> 00:30:19,064 You know, Marisa's not perfect. 596 00:30:19,088 --> 00:30:21,496 We have our problems like anyone else. 597 00:30:21,520 --> 00:30:23,498 Oh, really? 598 00:30:23,522 --> 00:30:26,371 You guys live one day at a time? 599 00:30:26,395 --> 00:30:28,373 Is your first thought when she's late 600 00:30:28,397 --> 00:30:32,097 that maybe she's out using again or maybe she's dead? 601 00:30:34,433 --> 00:30:37,490 It just seems like everything is so fragile right now, 602 00:30:37,514 --> 00:30:40,485 which is not the way you want it to be 603 00:30:40,509 --> 00:30:43,009 when you're about to have a baby. 604 00:30:47,176 --> 00:30:49,424 Ugh. 605 00:30:49,448 --> 00:30:52,127 So you're worried you might be having a kid 606 00:30:52,151 --> 00:30:54,459 with an unreliable guy. 607 00:30:54,483 --> 00:30:57,002 I get it. You did that once before. 608 00:30:57,026 --> 00:30:59,604 Uh, yeah. That guy was the worst. 609 00:30:59,628 --> 00:31:01,907 Wasn't I, though? 610 00:31:01,931 --> 00:31:04,269 I cheated, drank too much. 611 00:31:04,293 --> 00:31:07,172 I made that play for your cousin. 612 00:31:07,196 --> 00:31:09,474 Oh, right, you didn't know about that. 613 00:31:09,498 --> 00:31:11,576 That never happened. 614 00:31:11,600 --> 00:31:14,279 Anyway, I lied about every bit of it. 615 00:31:14,303 --> 00:31:16,590 At least Mike's trying to be honest. 616 00:31:16,614 --> 00:31:18,323 I know. 617 00:31:18,347 --> 00:31:21,126 I just wish I could fast-forward through my life 618 00:31:21,150 --> 00:31:23,428 and see that everything ends up okay. 619 00:31:23,452 --> 00:31:26,431 Hey, don't tell the plumber this, 620 00:31:26,455 --> 00:31:28,433 but, uh... He's a good guy. 621 00:31:28,457 --> 00:31:31,136 I think he's gonna be there for you 622 00:31:31,160 --> 00:31:33,168 in a way that I never was. 623 00:31:33,192 --> 00:31:35,292 Thank you. 624 00:31:37,296 --> 00:31:40,145 Which cousin? 625 00:31:40,169 --> 00:31:42,899 Oh, look, a model of the uterus. 626 00:31:46,075 --> 00:31:48,583 He's a big, gray cat, so if you could just keep an eye out? 627 00:31:48,607 --> 00:31:52,017 Of course. Actually, Karen, when I'm done here, 628 00:31:52,041 --> 00:31:55,020 I could go try to find Toby for you. Thanks, Bree. I appreciate that. 629 00:31:55,044 --> 00:31:57,671 Oh, if you do find him, don't look him in the eye. 630 00:31:57,695 --> 00:32:00,025 It angries him up. 631 00:32:00,049 --> 00:32:03,568 That's very nice of you to help her, 632 00:32:03,592 --> 00:32:06,579 and it'll take your mind off of everything with Orson, too. 633 00:32:06,603 --> 00:32:09,604 I hope so. Truth is, I miss him. 634 00:32:09,628 --> 00:32:12,307 And I'll probably let him come home eventually. 635 00:32:12,331 --> 00:32:14,539 I just need to know he understands 636 00:32:14,563 --> 00:32:16,641 the gravity of what he did. 637 00:32:16,665 --> 00:32:19,614 Well, I don't know what he did, but be careful. 638 00:32:19,638 --> 00:32:22,147 Some men say they're going to change, 639 00:32:22,171 --> 00:32:23,618 and they can't. 640 00:32:23,642 --> 00:32:27,592 Oh, hello, Dylan. You look lovely. 641 00:32:27,616 --> 00:32:30,956 She has a date with a boy I haven't met yet. 642 00:32:30,980 --> 00:32:33,458 It's just a movie. It's no big deal. 643 00:32:33,482 --> 00:32:35,961 Be that as it may, it's the, what, 644 00:32:35,985 --> 00:32:39,664 third time you've gone out? I don't even know his name. 645 00:32:39,688 --> 00:32:42,667 Mom, I told you. I'm not ready for you to meet him. 646 00:32:42,691 --> 00:32:46,118 When I am, you'll know. Good night, Mrs. Hodge. Good night. 647 00:32:46,142 --> 00:32:49,644 Okay, back to business. 648 00:32:49,668 --> 00:32:51,716 How do you feel about Parker house rolls? 649 00:32:51,740 --> 00:32:54,449 I mean, personally, I think they're played out. 650 00:32:54,473 --> 00:32:57,722 Actually, Bree, can we pick this up again tomorrow? 651 00:32:57,746 --> 00:33:01,556 Well, of course. Is everything all right? 652 00:33:01,580 --> 00:33:04,689 Oh, yes. I just need to go spy on my daughter. 653 00:33:04,713 --> 00:33:06,631 Ah, the key is to keep one car 654 00:33:06,655 --> 00:33:10,515 between yours and hers at all times. Have fun. 655 00:33:13,662 --> 00:33:16,601 Oh, we should probably get the check. 656 00:33:16,625 --> 00:33:18,603 I have to be back by 10:00. 657 00:33:18,627 --> 00:33:21,506 We still have time for coffee? 658 00:33:21,530 --> 00:33:24,549 I don't wanna push it. Mom was all over me tonight. 659 00:33:24,573 --> 00:33:27,412 I'm sorry about that. 660 00:33:27,436 --> 00:33:29,584 Whatever. It's fine. 661 00:33:29,608 --> 00:33:34,719 No. It's not. I can see how hard this whole thing is on you. 662 00:33:34,743 --> 00:33:38,693 It makes me wish we could just... 663 00:33:38,717 --> 00:33:40,565 Tell her the truth. 664 00:33:40,589 --> 00:33:43,068 I don't know. 665 00:33:43,092 --> 00:33:45,130 Well... 666 00:33:45,154 --> 00:33:48,233 It's your choice. And you're probably right. 667 00:33:48,257 --> 00:33:51,257 We got a good thing going here. I don't wanna ruin it. 668 00:33:53,332 --> 00:33:58,683 But I'll tell you something. If it was only up to me... 669 00:33:58,707 --> 00:34:00,645 I'd come clean. 670 00:34:00,669 --> 00:34:02,517 You would? 671 00:34:02,541 --> 00:34:04,289 Absolutely. 672 00:34:04,313 --> 00:34:08,193 That way I could tell your mom how sorry I am. 673 00:34:08,217 --> 00:34:10,795 I-I wouldn't expect her to forgive me, 674 00:34:10,819 --> 00:34:12,797 but I could hope 675 00:34:12,821 --> 00:34:15,600 she could at least... 676 00:34:15,624 --> 00:34:19,094 See I've changed. 677 00:34:21,590 --> 00:34:25,530 But whatever you wanna do is okay by me. 678 00:34:55,824 --> 00:34:58,503 Okay, thank you. 679 00:34:58,527 --> 00:35:01,476 Well, I've got a room at a hotel in mt. Pleasant. 680 00:35:01,500 --> 00:35:03,478 I guess I'll get going. 681 00:35:03,502 --> 00:35:07,312 Oh, it's late. Why not just go tomorrow? 682 00:35:07,336 --> 00:35:09,414 Well, I feel like I'm imposing. 683 00:35:09,438 --> 00:35:11,356 You are. 684 00:35:11,380 --> 00:35:13,358 But you make a decent Martini, 685 00:35:13,382 --> 00:35:15,360 so what the hell. 686 00:35:15,384 --> 00:35:17,292 So... 687 00:35:17,316 --> 00:35:19,294 You like the Hodge formula, huh? 688 00:35:19,318 --> 00:35:21,296 You see, the secret... 689 00:35:21,320 --> 00:35:23,850 I don't hear shaking. 690 00:35:26,425 --> 00:35:29,634 By the way, did you see Bree when you were coming home? 691 00:35:29,658 --> 00:35:31,536 Oh. 692 00:35:31,560 --> 00:35:33,838 No, I didn't. 693 00:35:33,862 --> 00:35:36,311 I keep thinking she's gonna call me. 694 00:35:36,335 --> 00:35:39,314 Look, you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to, 695 00:35:39,338 --> 00:35:41,316 but... what the heck happened 696 00:35:41,340 --> 00:35:43,518 over at Ken and Barbie's dream house? 697 00:35:43,542 --> 00:35:46,326 I made a mistake, and Bree won't forgive me. 698 00:35:46,350 --> 00:35:49,594 You see, that's the problem with the Brees of this world. 699 00:35:49,618 --> 00:35:52,157 They're too damn perfect. 700 00:35:52,181 --> 00:35:54,529 I mean, they don't understand 701 00:35:54,553 --> 00:35:57,707 that people like you and me... Well, that we screw up. 702 00:35:57,731 --> 00:36:00,365 Yeah, well, this was no ordinary mistake. 703 00:36:00,389 --> 00:36:02,637 This was... this was something terrible. 704 00:36:02,661 --> 00:36:04,569 Was it something gay? 705 00:36:04,593 --> 00:36:06,271 What? 706 00:36:06,295 --> 00:36:08,643 Of course it wasn't. Keep talking. 707 00:36:08,667 --> 00:36:10,345 Trust me. 708 00:36:10,369 --> 00:36:12,347 Bree will never forgive me. 709 00:36:12,371 --> 00:36:14,479 You know what? Maybe she shouldn't. 710 00:36:14,503 --> 00:36:18,353 Maybe I'm not worthy of forgiveness. 711 00:36:18,377 --> 00:36:20,485 Well... 712 00:36:20,509 --> 00:36:23,488 Are you sorry for what you did? 713 00:36:23,512 --> 00:36:29,364 Yes. More than anyone will ever know. 714 00:36:29,388 --> 00:36:32,597 Well, then you're worthy. 715 00:36:36,525 --> 00:36:39,544 Thank you, Edie. 716 00:36:39,568 --> 00:36:41,376 Mm. Don't start. 717 00:36:41,400 --> 00:36:43,678 I'm drunk. I'm gonna start crying, too. 718 00:36:43,702 --> 00:36:45,380 Come on. 719 00:36:45,404 --> 00:36:48,613 You're a good person, Edie Britt. 720 00:36:48,637 --> 00:36:51,686 Well, you're not so bad yourself. 721 00:37:01,550 --> 00:37:04,229 Mm, I don't... I don't think we should... 722 00:37:04,253 --> 00:37:06,431 You're right. 723 00:37:06,455 --> 00:37:08,673 Bad idea. 724 00:37:08,697 --> 00:37:11,906 I blame the Hodge formula. 725 00:37:11,930 --> 00:37:14,609 Yes. 726 00:37:14,633 --> 00:37:16,881 You're probably tired. 727 00:37:16,905 --> 00:37:20,705 Let me get your room ready for you. 728 00:37:34,983 --> 00:37:36,761 Mom? 729 00:37:36,785 --> 00:37:39,634 Can I talk to you? 730 00:37:39,658 --> 00:37:40,658 Of course. 731 00:37:45,564 --> 00:37:50,014 I guess I just have to say it. 732 00:37:50,038 --> 00:37:52,647 I've been lying to you. 733 00:37:52,671 --> 00:37:54,679 There is no boy. 734 00:37:54,703 --> 00:37:56,721 And? 735 00:37:56,745 --> 00:37:59,524 And... 736 00:37:59,548 --> 00:38:02,608 Well, I've been meeting someone. That part is true. 737 00:38:04,983 --> 00:38:06,931 But it's dad. 738 00:38:06,955 --> 00:38:08,955 I've been meeting dad. 739 00:38:11,690 --> 00:38:13,668 Really? 740 00:38:13,692 --> 00:38:16,971 So... you're not upset? 741 00:38:16,995 --> 00:38:21,506 You made it very clear that you wanted to meet your father, 742 00:38:21,530 --> 00:38:24,579 so I knew this day was coming, 743 00:38:24,603 --> 00:38:26,811 and I prepared myself. 744 00:38:26,835 --> 00:38:31,635 Well, can I go get him, then? 745 00:38:38,617 --> 00:38:41,047 Come in! She says it's okay. 746 00:38:49,758 --> 00:38:51,758 Hey, Kathy. 747 00:38:54,032 --> 00:38:55,710 Been a long time. 748 00:38:55,734 --> 00:38:58,613 Dylan, why don't you go up to your room 749 00:38:58,637 --> 00:39:00,737 so we can catch up? 750 00:39:03,712 --> 00:39:05,690 It's all right, really. 751 00:39:05,714 --> 00:39:07,454 Go ahead, honey. 752 00:39:14,052 --> 00:39:16,030 You did a great job with her. 753 00:39:16,054 --> 00:39:19,664 She's, uh, she's a wonderful girl. 754 00:39:22,691 --> 00:39:24,639 You look fantastic. 755 00:39:24,663 --> 00:39:26,673 Haven't aged a day. 756 00:39:33,001 --> 00:39:35,850 Look, I'm here for Dylan, okay? 757 00:39:35,874 --> 00:39:38,653 I'm sure that's what you told her, 758 00:39:38,677 --> 00:39:41,355 and I'm sure she believed it... 759 00:39:41,379 --> 00:39:43,988 Because she doesn't know you. 760 00:39:44,012 --> 00:39:45,690 But I do. 761 00:39:45,714 --> 00:39:48,893 No, you don't, Kathy, not anymore. 762 00:39:48,917 --> 00:39:50,995 It's been a long time... 12 years. 763 00:39:51,019 --> 00:39:53,698 I know exactly how long it's been. 764 00:39:53,722 --> 00:39:55,600 Okay. Good, 765 00:39:55,624 --> 00:39:58,703 because, um... I've changed. 766 00:39:58,727 --> 00:40:00,727 I'm a different man now. 767 00:40:02,571 --> 00:40:06,781 Well, you have to admit that that's possible, right? 768 00:40:06,805 --> 00:40:08,883 You've changed, huh? 769 00:40:08,907 --> 00:40:11,816 Well, maybe you have. 770 00:40:11,840 --> 00:40:14,889 I have. Like to know how? 771 00:40:14,913 --> 00:40:19,764 Sure... If you wanna tell me. 772 00:40:19,788 --> 00:40:22,166 I'm not scared of you anymore. 773 00:40:22,190 --> 00:40:25,470 Good. 774 00:40:25,494 --> 00:40:27,734 You don't have to be. 775 00:40:29,858 --> 00:40:33,007 I'm not the same woman you knocked around, 776 00:40:33,031 --> 00:40:36,180 the woman you punched... 777 00:40:36,204 --> 00:40:38,012 Choked... 778 00:40:38,036 --> 00:40:41,085 The one whose blood you licked off your knuckles. 779 00:40:41,109 --> 00:40:45,750 She's gone. 780 00:40:45,774 --> 00:40:50,054 So you'll just have to prove you're a man... 781 00:40:50,078 --> 00:40:52,497 Some other way. 782 00:40:52,521 --> 00:40:55,851 You trying to make me mad, Kathy? 783 00:41:00,689 --> 00:41:03,089 I didn't know I still could. 784 00:41:05,894 --> 00:41:08,944 Can I? 785 00:41:11,469 --> 00:41:14,879 This is a lot to deal with after so long, I guess. 786 00:41:14,903 --> 00:41:17,882 I shouldn't have sprung it on you all at once. 787 00:41:17,906 --> 00:41:20,606 Tell Dylan I'll call her tomorrow. 788 00:41:29,217 --> 00:41:32,257 And you're as beautiful as you ever were, Kath. 789 00:41:37,065 --> 00:41:39,765 Good night. 790 00:41:52,841 --> 00:41:56,020 The word "welcome" always carries with it 791 00:41:56,044 --> 00:41:58,222 a certain amount of risk. 792 00:41:58,246 --> 00:41:59,824 After all, 793 00:41:59,848 --> 00:42:05,800 to let someone into your home is to let them into your life. 794 00:42:05,824 --> 00:42:09,774 And we never know what sorts of horrible secrets 795 00:42:09,798 --> 00:42:13,507 they carry with them. 796 00:42:13,531 --> 00:42:17,281 We can't foresee the painful effect 797 00:42:17,305 --> 00:42:21,665 they might have on our loved ones. 798 00:42:23,311 --> 00:42:28,022 We don't anticipate the gossip that could result 799 00:42:28,046 --> 00:42:31,125 from their presence. 800 00:42:31,149 --> 00:42:32,897 Yes... 801 00:42:32,921 --> 00:42:34,899 We must be very careful 802 00:42:34,923 --> 00:42:38,903 with those we invite into our lives... 803 00:42:38,927 --> 00:42:41,065 Because some... 804 00:42:41,089 --> 00:42:43,089 Will refuse to leave.