WEBVTT
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..:: Presented By ZarFilm Website ::..
.:: www.bolboljan.net ::.
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Okay, yeah, Dad, just press the circle.
Just once. Just press it...
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Okay, wait, tell me when we're going.
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- Okay. All right.
- Okay. Ready?
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Okay. I know I have
some things to clear up, so...
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I thought this is gonna be the best way.
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If you don't like what I'm saying,
don't write in the comments
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because I will not read it
and will not even care.
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Okay, here we go.
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When I moved to the US,
I knew fitting in was gonna be hard.
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I just didn't know
how bloody hard it was going to be.
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And all I wanted was to get invited
to the coolest club in town,
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Rock 'N' Bowl.
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But I never was.
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Anyone who was anyone was rolling
with their homies on a Saturday night.
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It was like basically a VMAs after-party.
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So when I turned 14, uh, yeah,
that's where I had my birthday.
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- Ah! It's an alien baby.
- Ew!
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That's gonna make me sick.
I think I'm gonna shit fireballs.
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Being there made me feel cool
for the first time in my life.
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Steph, you do one.
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I felt like
the kids I wanted to be.
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You know, the ones who seem immune
to that awkward teen phase...
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...the ones whose bones
have Jenga'd themselves into a hot frame.
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The only bumps on their skin are abs,
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and their natural scent is perfect,
like CK One perfect.
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- The populars.
- Been looking for you.
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'Sup, Blaine. Hey, Tiffany.
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I'm having a birthday party,
if you guys wanna join.
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Ooh, ooh.
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Cute that in Australia
you call it a party,
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'cause in America,
we call that a freak show.
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Well, um, it's actually not a freak show
'cause we have cake, so...
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Let's go.
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God, I just wanted
to be like them so bad.
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If they were this amazing in high school,
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imagine how perfect
the rest of their lives would be.
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♪ Can make the darkness bright ♪
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Come on, Steph,
I wanna take more photos.
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Come on, Bobby!
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You are too much.
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Guys! Could we just, like, try to be cool
for once?
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I hated thinking
that life wasn't for me...
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that I was destined to be
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just some average, boring, invisible girl
who had no friends.
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In Australia, we call that a Nigel,
but whatever.
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You guys know what I mean.
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I wanted to be something more.
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And that's when I decided...
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...that's it.
I'm gonna become popular.
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I know your favorite is
"I Want It That Way,"
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but it's my favorite too.
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Oh my God!
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Okay, I Darrin Dance Groove'd my ass off
and became captain of the cheer squad.
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I got so many new friends,
I didn't even know some of their names.
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But like, of course,
I would always smile at them.
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And, oh my God, before I knew it,
I had the hottest boyfriend in school.
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Like he was so, so hot.
Just like, mega hot.
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Steph! Seth is here!
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Uh, yep, yep. Coming, coming.
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♪ Singing the song we wrote
About a girl you used to know ♪
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Mmm.
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Yeah, this... this
is really good, Mr. Conway.
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It's cereal, Seth.
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Stephie, let's move it!
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So, are you going to ask
my daughter to the prom or not?
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Me?
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What? No, I don't know
what you're talking about.
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You drive here every morning
just so Stephie can drive you to school.
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- You think I'm an idiot?
- No, sir.
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It's really hard to find the right time.
And what about Blaine?
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Hey!
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Oh my God, Seth, did you Fatone your hair?
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It looks so good!
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Dad, you didn't have to cook breakfast.
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You're about to graduate.
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We're not gonna have too many more
of these breakfast opportunities.
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- Yeah.
- Grateful to be included, sir.
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Um, can we actually rain check?
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I'm on a diet of only bananas
and ice cubes till prom.
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Oh! Speaking of...
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I've been, uh, waiting to give you this.
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"I know you'll look beautiful in this.
Love, Mum."
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Oh my God.
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It's gorgeous.
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You know, Dad, um,
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I saw at the mall
in that empty store next to Wet Seal
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that they were holding, like, groups
for widows and widowers.
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Looked pretty jumping.
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You're a catch, Mr. Conway.
A sad woman would totally go out with you.
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I'll tell you what, I'll ask somebody out
when you do, Seth.
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Yeah.
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Did you hear
Tiffany went behind my back
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and got the Activities Committee
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to make the prom king and queen song
"Wherever You Will Go" by The Calling?
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Uh, no. You know, that piece of gossip
hasn't really trickled down to me yet.
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Well, when it gets to you,
believe it.
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She's doing it to mess with me.
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She knows I want a classic,
like "Power of Love."
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I'm not going to go to my prom,
get my crown, get glitter-rained on
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and then dance to
"Wherever You Will F-ing..."
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Ooh! Ow!
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There she is,
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Deanna Russo,
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Harding High cheer captain
and prom queen '95.
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Bangin' bod.
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She's boy-band rich and lives
in the most beautiful house in Maryland
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with her... Three, two, one...
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...perfect husband,
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Harding High quarterback
with a famously girthy dong.
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So I've heard.
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They're just like me and Blaine.
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I want it so bad
I can practically taste them frenching.
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It's my dream life.
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And it all starts with prom queen.
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Well, I think you're better
than just another Deanna Russo.
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Oh my God, Seth...
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Oh my God.
Your forehead's bleeding.
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Oh.
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Sure you're okay?
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Oh, yeah, I'm good.
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Hey, so you know
prom is coming up,
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and I really wanted to ask you something.
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I know it's a long shot, but...
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Seth, you don't even have
to finish the question.
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- The answer's yes.
- Wait, really? What about Blaine?
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Ah, he'll understand. It wouldn't feel
right to spend prom without you.
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Seth,
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I would love for you to come
to my after-prom party.
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Oh, wow. Yeah, cool.
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- Thanks, Steph.
- Oh my God. Duh, no prob.
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Oh, also, there's gonna be a VIP room,
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and you're totally gonna be on the list.
I mean it.
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Fun.
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Okay, um, I'm gonna let you out here
because I got to make my entrance.
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Oh, also, I need that sock back.
It's Blaine's.
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We use it for handies.
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Oh, okay, yeah. That's... that's gross.
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- Bye!
- Bye!
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♪ I know where I belong ♪
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♪ And nothing's gonna happen ♪
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♪ Yeah ♪
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♪ 'Cause she's so high ♪
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♪ High above me ♪
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♪ She's so lovely ♪
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♪ She's so high ♪
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♪ Like Cleopatra ♪
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♪ Joan of Arc or Aphrodi... ♪
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Oh my God!
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I was wondering
where the future prom queen was.
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Just thinking about my life
with the future prom king.
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I'm gonna miss you so much
these next two periods.
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Yeah?
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Let me give you a little something
to remember me by. Boop, boop!
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Oh my God, Blaine, stop.
That's so embarrassing.
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Oh my God, he's so into me. What?
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Oh my God. Did anyone see that? Bye.
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Ew. He shouldn't do that to you.
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It's called love, Marth.
That's what couples do.
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When you get a boyfriend,
you'll understand.
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Yeah, I'll pass.
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Here.
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Don't lose these. I'm serious.
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If my parents find out I gave you
the keys to our lake house for a party,
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they'll ship me off to a convent
before I even make it to Wesleyan.
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My grandfather built that with his hands.
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If anything happens...
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Oh my God, I promise you have nothing
to worry about. You're the best.
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Thank you so much, Marth.
You know you're invited, right?
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Did you just invite me
to a party that's at my own house?
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Of course not.
I'm inviting you to the VIP section.
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Seth will be there too.
So you'll have someone to talk to.
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Right. I could also talk to you.
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Right, yeah, duh.
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Um, except I'm probably gonna be losing
my bottom half virginity to Blaine.
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So I'll be, like, in and out.
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So will Blaine, literally.
You know what I mean?
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Also, Martha, it's pep rally day.
Why aren't you in your cheer uniform?
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Oh my God.
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You look so hot right now.
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- You look so great.
- Okay. Yeah.
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- Okay. I'll see you later. Bye!
- Bye.
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So, I've been telling everyone
about the VIP section at our party,
00:09:57.250 --> 00:09:59.291
but here's a little secret.
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There's gonna be
a VIP VIP section just for us.
00:10:05.583 --> 00:10:07.125
For boning.
00:10:09.250 --> 00:10:11.416
Mmm, so, uh, about that,
00:10:11.500 --> 00:10:15.583
um, most of the football team's already
said yes to going to a different party.
00:10:15.666 --> 00:10:17.791
But this one has
a heated pool and a live band.
00:10:17.875 --> 00:10:19.958
What? Whose party?
00:10:20.541 --> 00:10:22.833
Tiff's. But we could bone there,
if you want.
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What the slut?
00:10:27.916 --> 00:10:30.000
Get back to your seat, Miss Conway.
00:10:30.083 --> 00:10:34.583
I would like to start my class
before the next millennium hits.
00:10:35.958 --> 00:10:38.375
- Can I go to the bathroom?
- Fine.
00:10:38.458 --> 00:10:39.791
Dex, wait.
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Get this to Tiffany,
00:10:48.708 --> 00:10:49.708
now.
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Would you turn your books to the...
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Got your note.
00:11:05.458 --> 00:11:09.958
For the last time, Tiffany,
I won cheer captain fair and square,
00:11:10.041 --> 00:11:13.875
and you and Blaine were broken up
when we got together. I don't cheat.
00:11:13.958 --> 00:11:19.083
So why do you continue
to be the butt-roids on my... butt?
00:11:19.166 --> 00:11:21.041
I don't know what you're talking about.
00:11:21.125 --> 00:11:23.625
First, you changed
the prom king and queen song.
00:11:23.708 --> 00:11:25.291
Now you're throwing an after-prom party
00:11:25.375 --> 00:11:27.666
when you know
I've been planning mine for months.
00:11:27.750 --> 00:11:30.226
You mean the one you have to throw
at Barfa's family lake house
00:11:30.250 --> 00:11:31.416
'cause you live in a shanty.
00:11:32.875 --> 00:11:34.083
Her name is Martha,
00:11:34.166 --> 00:11:37.375
and she hasn't thrown up on herself
since the eighth grade, so...
00:11:38.625 --> 00:11:40.291
- Cancel your party!
- Sorry.
00:11:40.375 --> 00:11:43.000
My daddy has already paid
for the caterers.
00:11:43.083 --> 00:11:47.791
Open bar, Jäger,
Mike's Hard Lemonade, Smirnoff Ice.
00:11:48.416 --> 00:11:50.208
All the good shit.
00:11:50.875 --> 00:11:53.833
So, you cancel yours.
00:11:53.916 --> 00:11:56.541
You won't wanna throw a party
after I beat you for prom queen.
00:11:57.958 --> 00:11:59.916
What makes you think
you're gonna win?
00:12:00.000 --> 00:12:02.375
'Cause I'm MTV, and you're VH1.
00:12:02.458 --> 00:12:04.791
I'm the real deal, and you're a poser.
00:12:04.875 --> 00:12:08.625
You think you can shimmy your koala ass
to the top of the food chain I created
00:12:08.708 --> 00:12:10.500
and screw up my senior year?
00:12:10.583 --> 00:12:13.125
You're just a poor spaz playing dress up.
00:12:15.041 --> 00:12:16.750
Don't go chasing waterfalls.
00:12:19.500 --> 00:12:22.041
Take that back.
00:12:28.333 --> 00:12:31.333
Freshmen suck!
00:12:31.416 --> 00:12:33.875
- Freshmen suck!
- Freshmen suck!
00:12:33.958 --> 00:12:35.666
- Freshman suck!
- Settle down.
00:12:36.458 --> 00:12:38.750
Blaine, settle down. Settle down.
00:12:39.291 --> 00:12:40.291
Listen.
00:12:40.666 --> 00:12:44.875
We have less than a month of school left.
Let's all just get through it.
00:12:45.458 --> 00:12:47.392
- Now I know you all...
- All right, sluts.
00:12:47.416 --> 00:12:49.291
Everybody, listen up.
00:12:49.375 --> 00:12:51.166
Listen to Martha.
00:12:51.250 --> 00:12:53.500
Just a couple notes
before we get out there.
00:12:53.583 --> 00:12:54.983
We replaced the spotlight operators
00:12:55.041 --> 00:12:56.833
with kids tall enough
to see what's going on.
00:12:56.916 --> 00:12:59.791
Try not to hit the ground too hard
so our CD doesn't skip.
00:12:59.875 --> 00:13:00.875
"Our CD"?
00:13:00.916 --> 00:13:05.916
I'm sorry, since when does a clipboard
and a windbreaker make you a Bulldogette?
00:13:06.000 --> 00:13:09.083
Since I appointed her
equipment manager, Tiffany.
00:13:09.166 --> 00:13:11.291
Do you have any idea
how much she does for us?
00:13:11.375 --> 00:13:14.000
Without her, we'd fall apart.
Whereas without you, Tiff,
00:13:14.083 --> 00:13:16.958
we'd, I don't know,
have less stains on our uniform
00:13:17.041 --> 00:13:20.041
from catching your spray-tanned ass.
00:13:20.125 --> 00:13:21.125
Continue, Marth.
00:13:21.208 --> 00:13:22.708
Oh, I was done.
00:13:23.291 --> 00:13:24.208
Oh.
00:13:24.291 --> 00:13:27.625
All right, biatches. When I started
choreographing this routine,
00:13:27.708 --> 00:13:30.875
I knew it had to be more
than just a regular cheer,
00:13:30.958 --> 00:13:34.458
which is why I made this,
00:13:34.541 --> 00:13:36.750
a step-by-step guide to our routine
00:13:36.833 --> 00:13:41.541
so that future squads will be able
to replicate our VMA-level performance.
00:13:42.541 --> 00:13:46.041
Martha, please see
that this gets into the school archives
00:13:46.125 --> 00:13:48.083
so that our legends will live on.
00:13:49.083 --> 00:13:51.458
- Do we have a school archive?
- We do now.
00:13:52.000 --> 00:13:53.666
All right, places, skanks!
00:13:55.041 --> 00:13:56.166
Twins?
00:13:56.958 --> 00:13:57.875
Can we talk?
00:13:57.958 --> 00:14:00.250
And speaking of "not school appropriate,"
00:14:00.333 --> 00:14:04.833
please welcome
our award-winning Harding Bulldogettes.
00:14:08.041 --> 00:14:09.041
♪ Are you ready ♪
00:14:09.833 --> 00:14:11.291
♪ For the Harding ♪
00:14:12.916 --> 00:14:15.541
- ♪ Bulldogettes? ♪
- That's my girl!
00:14:17.833 --> 00:14:19.583
♪ Good gracious, ass is bodacious ♪
00:14:19.666 --> 00:14:21.266
♪ Flirtatious, trying to show patience ♪
00:14:21.333 --> 00:14:23.125
♪ And can't nobody stop the juice ♪
00:14:23.208 --> 00:14:25.208
♪ So, baby, tell me what's the use
I said ♪
00:14:25.291 --> 00:14:27.625
- ♪ It's gettin' hot in here ♪
- ♪ So hot ♪
00:14:27.708 --> 00:14:29.333
♪ So take off all your clothes ♪
00:14:29.416 --> 00:14:33.250
♪ I am gettin' so hot
I wanna take my clothes off ♪
00:14:33.333 --> 00:14:35.291
- ♪ It's gettin' hot in here ♪
- ♪ So hot ♪
00:14:35.375 --> 00:14:36.916
♪ So take off all your clothes ♪
00:14:37.000 --> 00:14:40.541
♪ I am gettin' so hot
I wanna take my clothes off ♪
00:14:44.916 --> 00:14:48.125
♪ Come on over, come on over, baby ♪
00:14:48.208 --> 00:14:50.041
- Yeah!
- ♪ Come on over ♪
00:14:50.125 --> 00:14:51.750
♪ Come on over, over, over ♪
00:14:51.833 --> 00:14:54.041
♪ Baby, baby, baby ♪
00:14:55.708 --> 00:14:57.041
- Ready?
- Okay!
00:14:57.125 --> 00:15:00.750
♪ We are the Bulldogs
We like it rough, rough, rough ♪
00:15:00.833 --> 00:15:03.916
♪ No one can beat us
No, we're too tough ♪
00:15:04.583 --> 00:15:09.291
♪ Yeah, yeah, we fight to the finish
We're in it to win it ♪
00:15:09.375 --> 00:15:12.375
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
00:15:12.958 --> 00:15:14.458
♪ Like this ♪
00:15:14.541 --> 00:15:18.166
♪ Some people search forever ♪
00:15:18.250 --> 00:15:21.375
♪ For that one special kiss ♪
00:15:21.458 --> 00:15:27.375
♪ Oh, I can't believe
It's happening to me ♪
00:15:27.458 --> 00:15:31.291
♪ Some people wait a lifetime ♪
00:15:31.375 --> 00:15:33.083
♪ For a moment ♪
00:15:33.166 --> 00:15:36.291
♪ Moment, moment, moment ♪
00:15:36.375 --> 00:15:39.791
♪ Moment, moment, moment... ♪
00:15:49.958 --> 00:15:51.791
Who wants to forget
the good old days?
00:15:51.875 --> 00:15:53.166
No one.
00:15:53.250 --> 00:15:54.583
That's why, at Balbo Hummers,
00:15:54.666 --> 00:15:57.666
we've got the sweetest rides
for the sweetest prices.
00:15:57.750 --> 00:16:00.458
Oh! And hey,
all you high school seniors out there,
00:16:00.541 --> 00:16:03.125
who doesn't want a Hummer
on their big night. Am I right?
00:16:03.208 --> 00:16:08.291
That's right. Balbo Hummers is renting out
stretch limos for all of your prom needs.
00:16:08.375 --> 00:16:10.458
♪ Come get a Hummer from Balbo ♪
00:16:10.541 --> 00:16:14.333
Balbo Hummers.
We're ready for prom. Are you?
00:16:15.875 --> 00:16:17.250
I'm ready for prom.
00:16:29.375 --> 00:16:30.458
What the slut?
00:16:38.208 --> 00:16:39.958
Oh, hi.
00:16:40.791 --> 00:16:42.375
Hi. Hello. Hi.
00:16:42.458 --> 00:16:44.666
Excuse me. Um, I'm not sure what happened,
00:16:44.750 --> 00:16:48.166
but I think there's been a mistake,
and I've been put in the wrong room
00:16:48.250 --> 00:16:52.166
'cause there's a bunch of birthday cards
for, like, a really old person.
00:16:52.250 --> 00:16:54.708
And the TV's flat,
like the back of it is missing,
00:16:54.791 --> 00:16:57.166
and I really need to see
who's number one on TRL.
00:16:57.250 --> 00:17:00.250
Dr. Johnson to the third floor.
The cheerleader just woke up.
00:17:00.333 --> 00:17:03.583
Oh, I don't mean to be a bitch,
but "cheer captain."
00:17:04.083 --> 00:17:05.166
Cheer captain.
00:17:05.250 --> 00:17:09.333
And do you have any Von Dutch jeans?
'Cause this is, like, really unflattering.
00:17:09.416 --> 00:17:10.416
Oh crap.
00:17:12.000 --> 00:17:13.125
What are you staring at?
00:17:13.791 --> 00:17:16.958
Hello? It's very rude to be a stare bear.
00:17:18.291 --> 00:17:21.333
Hello? Are you... Stop... stop doing that!
00:17:21.416 --> 00:17:23.250
Why are you doing that, you freaky old...
00:17:33.791 --> 00:17:35.416
And the cheerleader's back down.
00:17:35.916 --> 00:17:38.125
Oh, cheer captain. Are you okay?
00:17:39.666 --> 00:17:41.750
This defies scientific explanation.
00:17:41.833 --> 00:17:42.916
Being this hot?
00:17:43.833 --> 00:17:44.666
No.
00:17:44.750 --> 00:17:46.916
Stephanie, it's 2022.
00:17:49.250 --> 00:17:50.375
No way.
00:17:50.458 --> 00:17:51.500
Mm-hmm.
00:17:51.583 --> 00:17:54.750
Are you sure I haven't been
Freaky Friday'd into some old lady's body?
00:17:54.833 --> 00:17:57.541
You've been in a coma
for almost two decades.
00:17:58.916 --> 00:18:00.583
That doesn't sound right.
00:18:00.666 --> 00:18:03.916
I know this is a lot to process,
but we'll just take this nice and slow.
00:18:04.000 --> 00:18:05.184
- Stephie?
- Stephanie!
00:18:05.208 --> 00:18:06.351
- Oh my God.
- Stephanie!
00:18:06.375 --> 00:18:09.875
Stephie, I can't believe this!
It's me. It's Dad!
00:18:10.916 --> 00:18:14.208
Oh my God!
00:18:14.291 --> 00:18:15.666
- Dad?
- Yeah!
00:18:15.750 --> 00:18:19.333
How about me? Do you remember?
It's Martha, Martha Riser.
00:18:19.416 --> 00:18:21.226
I never thought
I'd have this moment again.
00:18:21.250 --> 00:18:23.250
I was this close to freezing you.
00:18:23.333 --> 00:18:24.208
What do you mean, Dad?
00:18:24.291 --> 00:18:27.333
Don't worry. I couldn't afford it.
I was only gonna freeze your head.
00:18:27.416 --> 00:18:29.541
- No!
- We'll have to be gentle.
00:18:29.625 --> 00:18:32.000
Physically she's aged,
but mentally she's still 17.
00:18:32.083 --> 00:18:34.625
Of course. Yes, I see
how we came in a little hot.
00:18:34.708 --> 00:18:35.541
Yeah.
00:18:35.625 --> 00:18:38.500
Martha, you look like
an Ally McBeal character.
00:18:38.583 --> 00:18:40.250
Oh my God. Thank you.
00:18:40.750 --> 00:18:44.000
Well, the good news is
nothing abnormal came up in her tests.
00:18:44.083 --> 00:18:47.708
Stephanie, your physical
and mental resilience are remarkable.
00:18:47.791 --> 00:18:48.958
Uh, let... let's go home.
00:18:56.166 --> 00:18:59.166
Marth, oh my God, what is that, a tiny TV?
00:18:59.250 --> 00:19:02.250
No. No, Steph,
this is my cell phone.
00:19:02.333 --> 00:19:04.875
Oh my God. Whoa! Really?
00:19:04.958 --> 00:19:07.125
That is very cool.
00:19:07.208 --> 00:19:10.625
I always knew you'd be some high-powered,
Sex and the City businesswoman.
00:19:10.708 --> 00:19:12.625
- Total Miranda, right, Dad?
- Oh...
00:19:13.625 --> 00:19:17.250
I'm actually
a high school principal at Harding.
00:19:17.333 --> 00:19:21.416
Oh my God, you still got
a good sense of humor.
00:19:26.458 --> 00:19:32.291
That's... I mean, that's actually
a very cool and important job.
00:19:32.375 --> 00:19:35.000
- So, whoo!
- Mm-hmm.
00:19:35.875 --> 00:19:38.041
Um, and they give you
a fancy cell phone for that?
00:19:38.125 --> 00:19:40.000
Oh, they're common now. Even I have one.
00:19:40.083 --> 00:19:40.916
Oh. Okay.
00:19:41.000 --> 00:19:44.208
They do much more than just call people.
You could also watch the news.
00:19:44.291 --> 00:19:46.875
Look, here's a news story
about you right now.
00:19:46.958 --> 00:19:50.791
- What? No. Oh, about me? No, oh my God.
- Yeah, it's you!
00:19:50.875 --> 00:19:52.000
Okay, wait, show me.
00:19:52.083 --> 00:19:56.416
Video edits of her infamous accident
went immediately viral on Instagram...
00:19:56.500 --> 00:20:00.041
Oh my God.
I went down like a bag of dicks.
00:20:00.791 --> 00:20:01.875
Oh.
00:20:01.958 --> 00:20:03.517
- Stephie!
- Wait. What does "viral" mean?
00:20:03.541 --> 00:20:06.875
Well, "viral" just means everybody saw it.
00:20:06.958 --> 00:20:09.583
Everybody's seen that?
I look retarded in those videos.
00:20:09.666 --> 00:20:12.666
Now, Steph,
you... you cannot say the R-word anymore.
00:20:12.750 --> 00:20:14.375
- What? Really? Why?
- Mm-mm.
00:20:14.458 --> 00:20:17.291
Because it's offensive
to people with intellectual disabilities.
00:20:17.375 --> 00:20:20.958
But what if something
really is, like, "R-word,"
00:20:21.750 --> 00:20:24.666
um, what do you call it?
Like, "super gay"?
00:20:24.750 --> 00:20:28.458
No, no. You can't call things "gay"
anymore, either,
00:20:28.541 --> 00:20:31.958
unless you use it
as a neutral-positive term
00:20:32.041 --> 00:20:34.625
to refer to somebody
who identifies as homosexual.
00:20:34.708 --> 00:20:37.500
- So you cannot say the "R-word."
- Right.
00:20:37.583 --> 00:20:38.583
And, um...
00:20:38.625 --> 00:20:39.958
Sorry. Coma brain.
00:20:40.041 --> 00:20:42.083
- What was the other word you can't say?
- "Gay."
00:20:42.166 --> 00:20:43.291
Ha! Made you say it.
00:20:45.625 --> 00:20:47.041
- Stephie.
- I... That's...
00:20:47.125 --> 00:20:48.791
- Still got it, Dad.
- You do.
00:20:48.875 --> 00:20:51.416
Dad, um, can you take a left up here?
00:20:51.500 --> 00:20:52.625
- Oh.
- To see...
00:20:52.708 --> 00:20:56.291
No, no, no. No, um,
actually, you should get home and rest.
00:20:56.375 --> 00:20:58.833
Rest? I've been asleep for 20 years.
00:20:58.916 --> 00:21:01.458
- Dad, just take this left here.
- Jim, don't take the left.
00:21:01.541 --> 00:21:03.083
Is there... I don't understand...
00:21:03.166 --> 00:21:05.291
- Indicator. Indicate left.
- Do not. Do not.
00:21:06.291 --> 00:21:09.750
- Thank God, it's still the same.
- Yep. There it is. Let's keep going.
00:21:10.291 --> 00:21:11.971
That's not Deanna Russo's husband.
00:21:12.000 --> 00:21:13.375
- Who is that?
- Um...
00:21:13.458 --> 00:21:16.541
Oh my God.
I know that ass anywhere. That's Blaine.
00:21:16.625 --> 00:21:20.916
Wait. Did he get me my dream house?
Stop the car! Why didn't you say anything?
00:21:21.000 --> 00:21:23.916
- Don't stop the car.
- What are you talking about? Stop the car!
00:21:24.000 --> 00:21:25.916
Don't stop the car.
No. He's probably sleeping.
00:21:26.000 --> 00:21:28.160
- He walked into the house.
- You don't wanna wake him.
00:21:28.208 --> 00:21:29.291
He looked tired!
00:21:29.375 --> 00:21:32.041
- I don't know what to do. Ah!
- Just stop the car!
00:21:32.125 --> 00:21:33.333
No!
00:21:51.750 --> 00:21:53.083
Oh. You know what?
00:21:53.166 --> 00:21:55.666
Someone from the shelter
already came by yesterday
00:21:55.750 --> 00:21:59.208
to pick up our donations, so...
Thank you though.
00:21:59.291 --> 00:22:00.291
Tiffany?
00:22:01.458 --> 00:22:04.041
Shut up!
00:22:04.708 --> 00:22:06.083
Stephanie?
00:22:06.166 --> 00:22:09.916
Oh my God, look at you!
00:22:10.000 --> 00:22:12.666
- I can't believe this.
- What is happening?
00:22:12.750 --> 00:22:15.208
I have so many things I... I want to say.
00:22:15.291 --> 00:22:17.916
I've always felt terrible
about what happened.
00:22:18.000 --> 00:22:20.500
I can't believe
you didn't land that stunt.
00:22:20.583 --> 00:22:24.333
Wait, why are you living here with Blaine?
I don't get it.
00:22:24.416 --> 00:22:26.375
This is mine and Blaine's dream house, so...
00:22:26.458 --> 00:22:29.041
- Well, actually...
- Why are you here?
00:22:29.125 --> 00:22:30.625
It's a long story.
00:22:30.708 --> 00:22:33.625
Our parents got it for us
as a wedding gift and...
00:22:33.708 --> 00:22:36.250
Well, that's it. The end.
00:22:36.333 --> 00:22:37.791
No, you shut your face.
00:22:37.875 --> 00:22:41.000
Um, where's Blaine?
Just get me Blaine, and, um...
00:22:41.083 --> 00:22:44.041
I'm so sorry.
He is just so swamped right now with work.
00:22:44.125 --> 00:22:45.125
Oh.
00:22:45.500 --> 00:22:46.916
I see what you did here.
00:22:47.625 --> 00:22:50.041
Get rid of me
so you can steal my dream life.
00:22:50.125 --> 00:22:52.000
Oh...
00:22:52.708 --> 00:22:53.791
Steph.
00:22:53.875 --> 00:22:55.333
No, no.
00:22:55.416 --> 00:22:58.041
Look, I know
we never saw eye-to-eye back then,
00:22:58.125 --> 00:23:01.083
but you know, the beautiful thing
about time is you move on.
00:23:02.166 --> 00:23:07.291
Okay, you know what? I need to go
because I am brining zucchini ribbons,
00:23:07.375 --> 00:23:10.041
but I never let a guest leave
without a gift.
00:23:10.125 --> 00:23:13.041
Um, so I'm just gonna give you...
00:23:13.125 --> 00:23:14.250
- What?
- Here.
00:23:14.333 --> 00:23:17.208
Homemade from my own starter.
A peace offering.
00:23:17.291 --> 00:23:21.166
I really look forward
to putting the past behind us.
00:23:21.750 --> 00:23:25.208
You know, move past the past.
00:23:26.041 --> 00:23:29.625
So, maybe when you're feeling better
and a little bit more stable,
00:23:29.708 --> 00:23:31.125
we could do brunch sometime.
00:23:31.208 --> 00:23:33.041
- Blaine!
- It's great to see you!
00:23:33.125 --> 00:23:34.125
Blaine!
00:23:36.208 --> 00:23:39.375
Come on, come on, come on, come on.
00:23:41.458 --> 00:23:42.833
Who's that at the door?
00:23:42.916 --> 00:23:46.333
It was... Stephanie Conway.
00:23:50.000 --> 00:23:51.041
She's awake?
00:23:57.083 --> 00:23:58.125
Ah, yes.
00:24:00.833 --> 00:24:02.541
Perfectly preserved.
00:24:04.458 --> 00:24:06.916
And here we are.
00:24:07.000 --> 00:24:09.458
Oh!
Did she not wear her seat belt?
00:24:09.541 --> 00:24:10.791
I don't think she did.
00:24:10.875 --> 00:24:12.375
Oh God.
00:24:12.458 --> 00:24:14.791
- It's locked, hon.
- Dad!
00:24:14.875 --> 00:24:16.541
Here we are. Yeah.
00:24:16.625 --> 00:24:17.458
Hey, S...
00:24:19.791 --> 00:24:20.625
She's...
00:24:28.458 --> 00:24:30.166
Oh my God.
00:24:31.041 --> 00:24:33.000
Didn't have the heart to change it.
00:24:33.083 --> 00:24:37.458
Kept your Cabriolet too. You know me,
never very good at letting things go.
00:24:45.458 --> 00:24:48.958
I... I also never, uh, canceled
any of your magazine subscriptions.
00:24:49.041 --> 00:24:52.083
Wait, Madonna's now called Lady Gaga?
00:24:54.000 --> 00:24:54.833
- No.
- No.
00:24:54.916 --> 00:24:58.208
- But she looks exactly like Madonna.
- You've had a lot to digest today.
00:24:58.291 --> 00:24:59.833
We'll get you caught up this weekend.
00:25:01.750 --> 00:25:02.833
Dad!
00:25:06.458 --> 00:25:08.875
Dad. What the F?
00:25:09.458 --> 00:25:12.708
Who was in charge of my feeding tube?
My boobs are huge.
00:25:13.541 --> 00:25:16.000
Well, you... you're just getting older.
00:25:16.083 --> 00:25:17.916
You know, bodies change,
00:25:18.000 --> 00:25:21.166
and pretty soon,
you'll go through menopause.
00:25:21.250 --> 00:25:22.875
Oh my God. Don't.
00:25:24.375 --> 00:25:25.750
I can't do this.
00:25:27.750 --> 00:25:30.250
I was so close to having my dream life.
00:25:30.333 --> 00:25:32.125
You still can, sweetie.
00:25:32.208 --> 00:25:34.291
I can't. Look at this.
00:25:34.375 --> 00:25:36.166
Well...
00:25:36.250 --> 00:25:39.083
If anyone can do it, it's you.
00:25:39.166 --> 00:25:41.791
Oh, Dad, shut up. I'll get it.
00:25:41.875 --> 00:25:42.958
Dad...
00:25:43.041 --> 00:25:44.875
Oh God. Okay.
00:26:05.583 --> 00:26:08.666
♪ I built a place for you to land ♪
00:26:10.458 --> 00:26:12.125
♪ Can you see it now ♪
00:26:14.208 --> 00:26:16.208
♪ From where you stand? ♪
00:26:16.916 --> 00:26:20.958
♪ You may think the fall is just too far ♪
00:26:22.041 --> 00:26:23.625
♪ When you leap ♪
00:26:24.458 --> 00:26:27.625
♪ You see who you really are ♪
00:26:29.416 --> 00:26:33.333
♪ And if you jump now
I know you'll survive ♪
00:26:34.750 --> 00:26:38.250
♪ You see it's a beautiful ride ♪
00:26:39.416 --> 00:26:44.083
♪ When you're high ♪
00:26:44.166 --> 00:26:47.291
♪ Flying through the sky ♪
00:26:50.500 --> 00:26:52.500
♪ And on your way down ♪
00:26:52.583 --> 00:26:55.833
♪ The sound of a new day ♪
00:26:56.416 --> 00:26:58.208
♪ Calls you from the ground ♪
00:26:58.291 --> 00:27:00.416
Steph, babe, what are you doing?
00:27:00.500 --> 00:27:02.916
I'm trying to not be ugly.
00:27:04.666 --> 00:27:06.958
I'm just tired of being made fun of.
00:27:11.166 --> 00:27:13.375
You are not ugly.
00:27:14.791 --> 00:27:16.166
Yes, I am.
00:27:17.208 --> 00:27:19.708
I just want to be like the populars.
00:27:19.791 --> 00:27:22.625
Oh. What do they have that you don't?
00:27:22.708 --> 00:27:26.083
Cool hair. Hot clothes.
Even hotter boyfriends.
00:27:28.708 --> 00:27:30.601
They pronounce
their... R's.
00:27:30.625 --> 00:27:32.125
Mmm.
00:27:32.208 --> 00:27:33.333
Well...
00:27:34.291 --> 00:27:40.750
I think that you are beautiful
and smart and funny...
00:27:42.625 --> 00:27:44.791
...and I think the accent makes you unique.
00:27:46.958 --> 00:27:49.416
Well, it doesn't really count
if you say it, Mum.
00:27:49.500 --> 00:27:51.541
Oh. It doesn't, does it?
00:27:51.625 --> 00:27:54.916
Well, uh, too bad 'cause it's a fact.
00:27:56.208 --> 00:27:58.625
Mums have senses about things like this.
00:27:59.875 --> 00:28:02.625
- And I know that you...
- Uh, Mum.
00:28:02.708 --> 00:28:06.416
...are gonna graduate and grow up
00:28:07.375 --> 00:28:09.375
and have the most perfect life.
00:28:10.250 --> 00:28:11.291
I just know it.
00:28:13.333 --> 00:28:14.333
You mean it?
00:28:16.375 --> 00:28:18.708
Do you think I could even be prom queen?
00:28:20.125 --> 00:28:22.500
- You sure that's what you want?
- Duh.
00:28:24.750 --> 00:28:28.791
Well, if anyone can make it happen,
it's you.
00:28:56.500 --> 00:28:57.333
♪ Let's go ♪
00:28:57.416 --> 00:28:59.666
♪ Ten percent luck
Twenty percent skill ♪
00:28:59.750 --> 00:29:02.875
♪ Fifteen percent concentrated
Power of will ♪
00:29:02.958 --> 00:29:05.583
♪ Five percent pleasure
Fifty percent pain ♪
00:29:05.666 --> 00:29:07.958
♪ And a hundred percent reason
To remember the name ♪
00:29:08.041 --> 00:29:10.833
♪ This is ten percent luck
Twenty percent skill ♪
00:29:10.916 --> 00:29:13.750
♪ Fifteen percent concentrated
Power of will ♪
00:29:13.833 --> 00:29:16.583
♪ Five percent pleasure
Fifty percent pain ♪
00:29:16.666 --> 00:29:19.291
♪ And a hundred percent reason
To remember the name ♪
00:29:19.375 --> 00:29:20.541
♪ Yeah ♪
00:29:21.125 --> 00:29:23.208
♪ Fort Minor, M-Shinoda ♪
00:29:23.291 --> 00:29:25.041
♪ Styles of Beyond ♪
00:29:43.916 --> 00:29:45.500
- Martha!
- Oh my God.
00:29:45.583 --> 00:29:47.541
- There you are!
- Steph! Wha...
00:29:48.125 --> 00:29:49.875
- Yeah.
- What are you doing here?
00:29:49.958 --> 00:29:53.083
This is exactly the type of car
a principal would drive.
00:29:53.166 --> 00:29:55.541
It's like... like you nailed it.
00:29:55.625 --> 00:29:58.625
- Um, I just need your help with something.
- Uh...
00:29:59.625 --> 00:30:00.916
I want to go back to school.
00:30:01.708 --> 00:30:02.916
Oh, Steph.
00:30:03.000 --> 00:30:05.416
That's wonderful. Yes, of course.
00:30:05.500 --> 00:30:08.416
I can get you some info on those programs.
There's a lot of great ones.
00:30:08.500 --> 00:30:13.041
Uh, no, Marth, I meant, like,
me come back to school, to Harding High,
00:30:13.125 --> 00:30:14.500
and finish my senior year.
00:30:15.958 --> 00:30:16.958
What?
00:30:18.000 --> 00:30:19.000
God.
00:30:19.541 --> 00:30:20.541
No...
00:30:21.083 --> 00:30:21.916
No?
00:30:22.000 --> 00:30:24.375
Or not no, but maybe not?
00:30:24.458 --> 00:30:26.000
Steph, hey, you know what?
00:30:26.583 --> 00:30:27.875
Instead...
00:30:27.958 --> 00:30:30.291
Wow. There's online classes.
00:30:30.375 --> 00:30:32.083
Or... or... or... or...
00:30:32.166 --> 00:30:35.583
Um... Oh, GED courses
at the community college.
00:30:35.666 --> 00:30:38.333
I cannot move on
to the next chapter of my life
00:30:38.416 --> 00:30:41.375
if I'm still stuck in the old one
for 20 years.
00:30:41.958 --> 00:30:44.208
And I understand that, but...
00:30:44.833 --> 00:30:47.916
Steph... I can't let
an almost 40-year-old woman
00:30:48.000 --> 00:30:49.166
into high school.
00:30:49.250 --> 00:30:54.458
Yeah, but you heard the doctor.
I'm still 17 mentally.
00:30:54.541 --> 00:30:55.708
- And look...
- That's...
00:30:55.791 --> 00:30:59.625
...that is medical.
And you cannot argue with science.
00:30:59.708 --> 00:31:02.375
- Are you sure you're ready to go back?
- Yes!
00:31:02.458 --> 00:31:05.958
High school was like yesterday for me.
It will not be weird at all.
00:31:06.833 --> 00:31:08.375
What else am I supposed to do?
00:31:08.458 --> 00:31:11.916
Start an OnlyFans account?
Queef for 20 dollars?
00:31:12.000 --> 00:31:13.291
- What?
- That's...
00:31:13.375 --> 00:31:15.083
I think that's what happens there.
00:31:15.166 --> 00:31:18.250
Those aren't your only two options.
You have lots of options.
00:31:18.833 --> 00:31:22.541
Look... high school,
it's an intense but delicate ecosystem.
00:31:22.625 --> 00:31:24.583
Yeah, which I can handle.
00:31:25.166 --> 00:31:27.833
But you know what? There's only a month
of the school year left...
00:31:27.916 --> 00:31:30.541
Oh, that's perfect!
That's basically the time that I missed!
00:31:31.291 --> 00:31:34.291
- Oh, yeah.
- Oh, that is, like, fate.
00:31:34.375 --> 00:31:36.541
Like, Destiny's Child.
00:31:38.291 --> 00:31:41.958
Well, you might be
the first person in history
00:31:42.041 --> 00:31:44.208
to use a doctor's note to get into school.
00:31:44.291 --> 00:31:46.708
My God! Yes!
00:31:47.291 --> 00:31:50.291
Martha! Oh my God.
You're the best. You're the best.
00:31:50.375 --> 00:31:52.083
I'm so worried.
00:31:52.666 --> 00:31:57.291
♪ This time I'm gonna be
Everything I want me to be ♪
00:31:57.375 --> 00:31:59.500
♪ So fresh, yeah, so free ♪
00:31:59.583 --> 00:32:01.625
♪ I'mma get what's coming to me ♪
00:32:01.708 --> 00:32:03.875
♪ No diamonds, no rubies ♪
00:32:03.958 --> 00:32:06.541
♪ Gonna keep me down
No, I gotta be ♪
00:32:06.625 --> 00:32:09.083
♪ So damn high
Yeah, you'll see ♪
00:32:09.166 --> 00:32:10.958
♪ I'mma be where I wanna be ♪
00:32:11.041 --> 00:32:14.791
♪ Hold on tight if you want to ride ♪
00:32:14.875 --> 00:32:20.250
♪ I'mma reach new heights
Yeah, let's paint the sky ♪
00:32:20.333 --> 00:32:22.916
- ♪ I'm gonna be your ♪
- ♪ Aeroplane ♪
00:32:25.708 --> 00:32:26.750
Sorry, babe.
00:32:27.333 --> 00:32:28.458
I was in a coma.
00:32:28.541 --> 00:32:32.833
♪ Ooh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
00:32:33.333 --> 00:32:35.000
♪ Ooh, oh ♪
00:32:35.583 --> 00:32:37.875
- ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
- ♪ Give it to me ♪
00:32:37.958 --> 00:32:43.375
♪ I'm so addicted to the loving
That you're feeding to me ♪
00:32:47.500 --> 00:32:51.125
♪ Oh, baby, baby ♪
00:32:51.208 --> 00:32:55.750
♪ Body's in withdrawal
Every time you take it away... ♪
00:32:55.833 --> 00:32:58.250
Miss Conway! Miss Conway! Miss Conway!
00:32:58.333 --> 00:33:01.166
- Hi!
- G'day, mate!
00:33:01.250 --> 00:33:04.583
I wanted to say hi in your native tongue.
'Cause you're Australian, right?
00:33:04.666 --> 00:33:06.416
- Yes. Yeah.
- Oh, good, good, good!
00:33:06.500 --> 00:33:09.625
Your friend, my boss, Principal Riser,
asked me to show you around
00:33:09.708 --> 00:33:12.041
and give you a little orientation
here at Harding.
00:33:12.125 --> 00:33:14.958
Oh, okay. I don't really need to.
I know my way around.
00:33:15.041 --> 00:33:18.500
Oh, come on, it's fun.
I have nothing else to do.
00:33:18.583 --> 00:33:22.291
I'm Mr. Tapper, the guidance counselor,
but you can call me Mr. T.
00:33:22.375 --> 00:33:26.250
Is that because you...
..."pity the fool" who has a bad first day?
00:33:26.333 --> 00:33:27.666
Oh.
00:33:27.750 --> 00:33:31.250
Well, yeah. Yeah, I would feel...
I would feel terrible.
00:33:31.333 --> 00:33:34.208
No. I meant, like,
you know, Mr. T.
00:33:34.291 --> 00:33:37.208
"I pity the fool. I pity the fool."
00:33:37.291 --> 00:33:41.500
I've never said that before, but I guess
I could start if you wanted me to.
00:33:41.583 --> 00:33:42.875
I pity the fool!
00:33:43.666 --> 00:33:45.958
Mr. T is pitying fools over here.
00:33:46.041 --> 00:33:50.000
All right, let's, um...
let's... let's go on a little tour here.
00:33:50.083 --> 00:33:53.291
I have your records here from 2002.
You were a cheerleader.
00:33:53.375 --> 00:33:55.625
- Cheer captain.
- Ooh, cheer captain.
00:33:55.708 --> 00:34:00.125
Uh, president of the Fashion Club.
Whoa! Your grades were pretty good.
00:34:00.208 --> 00:34:03.916
My God, shut up. Don't. I don't want
anybody here to think I'm a dork.
00:34:04.000 --> 00:34:05.791
I'm saying
graduating shouldn't be a problem.
00:34:05.875 --> 00:34:06.958
Wait. What happened?
00:34:07.625 --> 00:34:09.875
Where are
all the prom king and queen winners?
00:34:09.958 --> 00:34:13.875
Oh, um, Principal Riser felt
that it sent a bad message,
00:34:13.958 --> 00:34:16.333
so she replaced it
with something more positive.
00:34:17.125 --> 00:34:19.583
- That looks like a bunch of tampons.
- Yeah, it is.
00:34:19.666 --> 00:34:21.375
But it's also found art.
00:34:21.875 --> 00:34:24.250
So you're saying they're found tampons.
00:34:25.125 --> 00:34:27.625
Oh, yes, I am.
00:34:40.541 --> 00:34:44.083
If not, just pretend
it's fake history.
00:34:44.166 --> 00:34:45.333
Oh! I am so sorry.
00:34:46.750 --> 00:34:47.750
Stephanie?
00:34:48.250 --> 00:34:49.875
- Oh my God!
- It... it's... it's Seth!
00:34:49.958 --> 00:34:51.291
- Seth?
- Yeah!
00:34:51.375 --> 00:34:53.041
- Oh, Seth!
- Oh my goodness!
00:34:53.125 --> 00:34:54.875
- Oh!
- Wow!
00:34:54.958 --> 00:34:56.666
Martha said that you were back,
00:34:56.750 --> 00:34:59.500
and I guess, in my head,
I just couldn't make it real,
00:34:59.583 --> 00:35:01.250
but look at you. You look great!
00:35:01.333 --> 00:35:04.250
It's me! Like, look,
I'm walking and talking.
00:35:04.333 --> 00:35:06.166
- Yeah. Doing all those things.
- Everything.
00:35:06.250 --> 00:35:07.958
Just like you used to, walk and talk.
00:35:08.041 --> 00:35:10.625
Well, look at you! Oh my God!
00:35:10.708 --> 00:35:14.583
- You look so cool and suave and adult.
- Yeah.
00:35:14.666 --> 00:35:17.708
Wow! What happened to that nerd
that used to just hang out in the library?
00:35:17.791 --> 00:35:20.000
He became the school librarian.
00:35:20.791 --> 00:35:21.916
Seriously?
00:35:22.000 --> 00:35:23.083
- Mm-hmm.
- Ah...
00:35:23.166 --> 00:35:25.333
Seth, thank you so much for the yearbook.
00:35:25.416 --> 00:35:27.458
Why didn't you just come in and say hi?
00:35:27.541 --> 00:35:31.458
You know,
I didn't wanna overwhelm you, you know.
00:35:31.541 --> 00:35:33.958
Plus, I can't stay out so late
on a school night.
00:35:34.041 --> 00:35:36.666
Ah, shit. Shoot.
00:35:36.750 --> 00:35:37.750
Dang!
00:35:38.083 --> 00:35:42.083
I wish I could hang out and talk more,
but I gotta get back to work.
00:35:42.166 --> 00:35:44.791
- Oh, yeah, I got to get back to class.
- Yeah.
00:35:44.875 --> 00:35:46.916
I don't wanna be
20 years and ten minutes late.
00:35:47.583 --> 00:35:50.916
So, I will see you around.
You know where to find me.
00:35:51.000 --> 00:35:54.416
Yeah, same.
You know where to find me, in the library.
00:35:54.500 --> 00:35:57.666
- Some things never change, right?
- Bye, Seth. I'll call you.
00:35:58.500 --> 00:36:00.833
Or you can do some long division, I guess.
00:36:04.000 --> 00:36:05.958
Steph, how's your first day?
00:36:06.041 --> 00:36:09.208
Oh my God,
it's just been, like, so amazing.
00:36:09.291 --> 00:36:12.666
Like, just making new friends.
Everyone's already obsessed with me.
00:36:12.750 --> 00:36:16.000
That's so great. We strive
for a welcoming environment here.
00:36:16.083 --> 00:36:19.708
Um, listen, I need to talk to you
about rejoining the Bulldogettes.
00:36:19.791 --> 00:36:23.000
Um, instead of cheer, I think
you should be focusing on your schoolwork.
00:36:23.083 --> 00:36:25.125
Yeah. Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure!
00:36:25.208 --> 00:36:28.541
Um, but who do I talk to about rejoining?
00:36:29.875 --> 00:36:32.750
Well, you would talk to me.
I'm the cheer coach now.
00:36:32.833 --> 00:36:35.000
Okay. Wait, I see your game.
00:36:35.083 --> 00:36:36.375
You become principal
00:36:36.458 --> 00:36:39.958
so then you can get real power
by running the cheer squad.
00:36:40.041 --> 00:36:41.750
That's smart. I respect that.
00:36:41.833 --> 00:36:45.166
Yeah, that... that's not why
I got my master's in education.
00:36:45.250 --> 00:36:47.666
Um, look, I don't think the cheer squad
00:36:47.750 --> 00:36:49.208
needs a new member right now.
00:36:49.791 --> 00:36:52.333
Well, that's wrong
'cause every cheer squad in the country
00:36:52.416 --> 00:36:53.666
would love to have me.
00:36:53.750 --> 00:36:57.583
There's only two performances left,
so I don't think it's worth it.
00:36:57.666 --> 00:37:00.500
Marth, I only need
one performance to make a splash
00:37:00.583 --> 00:37:02.541
if I have any chance
of becoming prom queen.
00:37:03.875 --> 00:37:06.125
- Steph...
- This head still needs a crown.
00:37:06.208 --> 00:37:09.916
I'm so sorry.
It's not gonna get it.
00:37:10.000 --> 00:37:11.000
Steph,
00:37:11.791 --> 00:37:14.416
we do not have
prom queen at this school anymore.
00:37:19.708 --> 00:37:21.833
Oh my God, are you having a mini stroke?
00:37:26.291 --> 00:37:27.166
What?
00:37:27.250 --> 00:37:29.666
Competitions like that, they're dangerous.
00:37:29.750 --> 00:37:33.250
Winning things, it just...
it doesn't reflect our school values.
00:37:33.333 --> 00:37:36.625
With no winners, there aren't any losers.
00:37:36.708 --> 00:37:39.500
I've made a school with no losers.
00:37:39.583 --> 00:37:43.208
But everybody was just talking to me
about how much they want prom queen.
00:37:43.291 --> 00:37:47.291
Steph, if all the students want it back,
they know they can petition for it.
00:37:47.375 --> 00:37:49.041
But so far no one has.
00:37:49.125 --> 00:37:51.375
Oh, that was so close.
You were so close.
00:37:51.458 --> 00:37:54.291
- Let me put it my mouth.
- One more. Ready and one...
00:37:54.916 --> 00:37:56.500
Yay!
00:37:56.583 --> 00:37:59.333
Oh, hey, is this where the ho-bags sit?
00:38:00.041 --> 00:38:02.375
♪ Ho-ing down with the ho-bags, yeah ♪
00:38:02.958 --> 00:38:05.375
♪ Ho... ♪
That's a fun way of saying "what's up?"
00:38:05.458 --> 00:38:07.833
- I'm Janet.
- And I'm Yaz, and that's Neil.
00:38:07.916 --> 00:38:10.208
I just have to say I'm living
for this little vintage fit.
00:38:10.291 --> 00:38:12.458
And I'm not even JK-ing. Okay?
00:38:12.541 --> 00:38:16.250
Okay, what is with
this enormous lunch table?
00:38:16.333 --> 00:38:18.541
How are we supposed to know
where the popular kids sit?
00:38:18.625 --> 00:38:22.458
Well, when there's just one table,
we're all popular kids.
00:38:22.541 --> 00:38:24.741
- Everybody.
- Oh no, no, no. That's not how life works.
00:38:24.791 --> 00:38:26.791
There's only, like, three ways
to become popular,
00:38:26.875 --> 00:38:29.458
to be a cheerleader,
to work at Abercrombie,
00:38:29.541 --> 00:38:31.208
or to let guys go in the back door.
00:38:31.291 --> 00:38:33.226
- What?
- Oh my God, I must be really popular then.
00:38:33.250 --> 00:38:35.416
What?
00:38:36.416 --> 00:38:38.750
- Nothing.
- Anyways, um, Janet...
00:38:38.833 --> 00:38:40.166
Mm-hmm.
00:38:40.250 --> 00:38:43.750
...I was wondering
if you would like to sign my petition.
00:38:43.833 --> 00:38:46.041
It's to bring back
prom queen to Harding High.
00:38:46.125 --> 00:38:48.541
- Oh my gosh!
- No way!
00:38:48.625 --> 00:38:50.583
Do I respect IRL grassroot efforts
00:38:50.666 --> 00:38:53.083
to effect change
into societal systems? Yes.
00:38:53.166 --> 00:38:56.750
It's also very refreshing
to see non-digital campaign strategy.
00:38:56.833 --> 00:38:58.333
- It is.
- So I'll sign it.
00:38:58.416 --> 00:39:01.791
I'll sign it too, but don't be surprised
if we're the only ones.
00:39:02.375 --> 00:39:03.541
Why's that?
00:39:03.625 --> 00:39:06.208
Because nobody's gonna sign this
unless Bri Luvs signs it.
00:39:06.291 --> 00:39:08.125
- Who?
- Her.
00:39:08.750 --> 00:39:11.458
Bri Luvs.
That's just her name on social media.
00:39:11.541 --> 00:39:14.291
She's got, like,
three million Instagram followers.
00:39:14.375 --> 00:39:18.791
And that 98 pounds of sexy is Lance,
her fine-ass boyfriend.
00:39:18.875 --> 00:39:21.791
Last year, Vice did a whole vlog
about their open relaish
00:39:21.875 --> 00:39:24.666
and called it
the gold standard of the future.
00:39:24.750 --> 00:39:27.166
Cool, cool, cool.
So, um, how do I get her to sign it?
00:39:27.250 --> 00:39:30.208
Oh, you won't. She's untouchable.
00:39:30.291 --> 00:39:33.250
Okay, everyone's friends with her,
but she's friends with no one.
00:39:33.333 --> 00:39:34.166
Yeah.
00:39:34.250 --> 00:39:36.125
- She's coming over here.
- No, she's not.
00:39:36.208 --> 00:39:38.375
- Just act normal. Avoid eye contact and...
- Okay.
00:39:38.458 --> 00:39:42.083
- Yaz! Been a minute, huh?
- It has been so long.
00:39:42.166 --> 00:39:46.500
So long! And Janet, loved your post about
alternative body positivity the other day.
00:39:46.583 --> 00:39:48.375
You are so inspiring.
00:39:48.458 --> 00:39:50.791
I was just showing off
my new bathing suit.
00:39:50.875 --> 00:39:53.875
Hi, I'm Bri, and you must be Stephanie.
00:39:53.958 --> 00:39:55.041
I heard about you.
00:39:55.125 --> 00:39:56.750
Really?
00:39:56.833 --> 00:39:57.833
I mean, um...
00:39:58.833 --> 00:40:01.666
Yeah, obviously,
because I'm, like, the total shiznit,
00:40:01.750 --> 00:40:04.541
and I basically used to be you
when I went here.
00:40:04.625 --> 00:40:07.541
You know, the most popular girl in school
'cause we're the same.
00:40:07.625 --> 00:40:09.875
I don't really think about popularity.
00:40:09.958 --> 00:40:12.666
I'm just trying to build
my most authentic, socially conscious,
00:40:12.750 --> 00:40:16.125
body-positive, environmentally aware,
and economically compassionate brand
00:40:16.208 --> 00:40:18.500
that's a home for inclusion,
focused fashion, food,
00:40:18.583 --> 00:40:19.958
and fun-filled lifestyles.
00:40:20.041 --> 00:40:22.916
And if tons of people respond to that,
then, great.
00:40:23.500 --> 00:40:25.750
Totally. Yes.
00:40:25.833 --> 00:40:28.291
I mean, obviously.
00:40:28.375 --> 00:40:31.333
Um, while I've got you here,
would you mind signing this?
00:40:31.416 --> 00:40:33.541
I'm gonna stop you right there.
00:40:33.625 --> 00:40:37.250
I made a paper-free pledge this year,
so I only deal with forms digitally.
00:40:37.333 --> 00:40:40.291
I'm sure you understand.
But can we take an ussie?
00:40:40.875 --> 00:40:42.791
Yes. Absolutely.
00:40:42.875 --> 00:40:45.416
- Where to?
- Um...
00:40:45.500 --> 00:40:48.000
Where are we going? We're going...
Ooh. What? Sorry.
00:40:49.916 --> 00:40:51.676
- What was that?
- Oh, before I forget.
00:40:51.708 --> 00:40:54.375
My mom, Tiffany,
told me to tell you she says hi.
00:40:54.458 --> 00:40:56.416
She said to remind you
she's married to Blaine
00:40:56.500 --> 00:40:58.726
and lives in your dream house,
in case you couldn't place her.
00:40:58.750 --> 00:41:00.666
Your mom, Tiffany.
00:41:00.750 --> 00:41:02.833
Nice meeting you, Stephanie. Bye.
00:41:03.541 --> 00:41:05.250
- Bye.
- Bye.
00:41:06.125 --> 00:41:08.416
Baby, you're manspreading again.
00:41:08.500 --> 00:41:09.375
Oh.
00:41:09.458 --> 00:41:10.750
Whoops.
00:41:12.291 --> 00:41:14.833
Oh my God. He knows you exist.
00:41:14.916 --> 00:41:18.333
Yeah, 'cause probably
he's, like, already obsessed with me.
00:41:18.416 --> 00:41:21.625
Oh my God. What is that? A fire drill?
00:41:21.708 --> 00:41:23.250
- Uh...
- What, robot invasion?
00:41:23.333 --> 00:41:24.373
Bri is going live.
00:41:24.958 --> 00:41:28.750
Hey, guys, we have a new student
at Harding High, and she's older than us.
00:41:28.833 --> 00:41:31.500
And I want to remind
everyone around the world
00:41:31.583 --> 00:41:35.000
that treating someone different
'cause they're elderly is called ageism,
00:41:35.083 --> 00:41:38.375
no matter how weird or foreign
or out of touch they may seem,
00:41:38.958 --> 00:41:40.166
and that's not cool.
00:41:40.750 --> 00:41:42.708
Also, stay tuned. I have amazing news
00:41:42.791 --> 00:41:45.666
about my upcoming summer
screen-detox vacay in Nepal.
00:41:45.750 --> 00:41:49.500
Remember, Bri loves you.
00:41:50.583 --> 00:41:51.583
That was hot.
00:41:52.125 --> 00:41:53.125
You're hot.
00:41:54.958 --> 00:41:57.791
- I'll sign your petition.
- Oh my God! Yay! Three people!
00:41:57.875 --> 00:41:59.083
- Whoo!
- Oh my God, no.
00:41:59.166 --> 00:42:01.500
Guys, I need
the cheerleaders to sign this.
00:42:01.583 --> 00:42:03.708
Because then everyone will.
Cheer pressure.
00:42:03.791 --> 00:42:07.041
Well, they'll sign it
'cause we already did.
00:42:07.875 --> 00:42:08.708
Ha!
00:42:08.791 --> 00:42:11.416
- You guys are the cheerleaders?
- Absolutely.
00:42:13.083 --> 00:42:15.333
- Ready?
- Okay!
00:42:15.416 --> 00:42:17.708
♪ The Earth is smoking ♪
00:42:17.791 --> 00:42:19.750
♪ We need new laws ♪
00:42:20.583 --> 00:42:25.541
♪ Turtles are choking on plastic straws ♪
00:42:27.083 --> 00:42:29.833
Oh.
Good job, good job. What'd you think?
00:42:31.083 --> 00:42:32.291
What was that?
00:42:32.833 --> 00:42:35.166
- Well, that's...
- What was that?
00:42:36.166 --> 00:42:38.833
- It's our most popular routine.
- Yeah.
00:42:39.791 --> 00:42:42.625
- Well, who were you guys cheering for?
- For everyone.
00:42:42.708 --> 00:42:45.625
You know, to do the right thing, right?
Team Humanity!
00:42:45.708 --> 00:42:47.041
Team Humanity!
00:42:47.125 --> 00:42:48.750
Uh...
00:42:48.833 --> 00:42:51.791
But what about, like, the music
and the dancing and the flipping?
00:42:51.875 --> 00:42:55.000
Oh. Oh no. No.
We do not do stunts anymore.
00:42:55.083 --> 00:42:57.791
- Oh.
- And also we don't do any sexy dancing.
00:42:57.875 --> 00:43:00.833
We'd rather have people listen
to our words than just our bodies.
00:43:00.916 --> 00:43:03.500
Okay, yeah, but this cheer
would be so much better
00:43:03.583 --> 00:43:07.083
if you guys made me believe you were
seconds away from showing your tits.
00:43:07.166 --> 00:43:09.000
- No, Steph...
- Yes, Martha.
00:43:09.083 --> 00:43:11.750
- Okay.
- Yes. I had this one signature move.
00:43:11.833 --> 00:43:15.375
You'll love it. It's called lips to lips.
Everybody, do it with me.
00:43:15.458 --> 00:43:17.041
- Don't.
- You start on the face.
00:43:17.125 --> 00:43:18.726
- Fingers go down the body.
- No.
00:43:18.750 --> 00:43:20.208
Down the body and up.
00:43:20.291 --> 00:43:22.708
No! Why is everyone doing it?
I'm saying don't do it.
00:43:22.791 --> 00:43:24.291
- Okay, look.
- Okay.
00:43:24.375 --> 00:43:27.541
We would do that, but our freshman year,
Bri Luvs made an Instagram post
00:43:27.625 --> 00:43:29.791
saying that cheerleaders
were anti-feminist.
00:43:29.875 --> 00:43:32.315
The whole school turned against us,
and we had to recalibrate.
00:43:32.375 --> 00:43:34.791
Her post got, like, seven million likes.
00:43:34.875 --> 00:43:36.395
- Eight million.
- It was for the best.
00:43:36.458 --> 00:43:39.166
Anyways, let's show her
our gun control routine.
00:43:39.250 --> 00:43:40.892
- It's one of our best.
- No, wait!
00:43:40.916 --> 00:43:43.458
What even is this squad? Like...
00:43:45.291 --> 00:43:46.791
Is there even a cheer captain?
00:43:46.875 --> 00:43:49.041
- Yeah.
- Yeah, Stephanie, I am the cheer captain.
00:43:49.125 --> 00:43:51.375
- I am the cheer captain.
- I am the cheer captain.
00:43:51.458 --> 00:43:53.250
I'm a cheer captain.
00:43:53.333 --> 00:43:54.500
- And also the coach.
- You?
00:43:55.625 --> 00:43:58.541
Martha, that's the most fucked up thing
I've ever heard.
00:43:58.625 --> 00:44:02.291
Steph, we are all cheer captains here
to promote... Say it with me.
00:44:02.375 --> 00:44:05.041
Equality!
00:44:05.125 --> 00:44:08.250
- Including you, Steph.
- Welcome.
00:44:08.333 --> 00:44:10.916
Do you love it? Are you okay?
00:44:11.708 --> 00:44:13.000
Oh my God.
00:44:13.083 --> 00:44:15.392
- Oh my God.
- She loves it, you guys. You nailed it!
00:44:18.000 --> 00:44:19.958
- Oh my God!
- Aw!
00:44:23.666 --> 00:44:25.125
Excuse me, Mr. Bud.
00:44:25.208 --> 00:44:26.500
Hey, what's up?
00:44:26.583 --> 00:44:28.500
Um, seeing as you're my librarian now,
00:44:28.583 --> 00:44:31.625
you're legally obligated
to help me research something, yeah?
00:44:31.708 --> 00:44:32.541
Yeah, by law.
00:44:32.625 --> 00:44:36.291
Yeah, I think the teachers union's
a real stickler about that sort of thing.
00:44:36.375 --> 00:44:39.208
I'm just kidding.
I'm not in the union. What's up?
00:44:39.291 --> 00:44:41.833
- Oh, this is addictive.
- Yeah.
00:44:41.916 --> 00:44:45.083
Social platforms have become
a vital tool for communication.
00:44:45.166 --> 00:44:48.250
Look, it's a turtle humping a rock!
00:44:48.333 --> 00:44:49.666
- Yeah.
- Oh, get it. Get it.
00:44:49.750 --> 00:44:51.416
Yeah, oh, that gets a heart.
00:44:51.500 --> 00:44:52.976
And it's also that.
00:44:53.000 --> 00:44:55.791
Okay. All right.
I think I've worked this thing out.
00:44:55.875 --> 00:44:56.708
Okay.
00:44:56.791 --> 00:44:59.458
So, basically you get followers
by being somebody everybody likes.
00:44:59.541 --> 00:45:00.375
Mm-hmm.
00:45:00.458 --> 00:45:03.666
So it's a popularity contest,
but instead of just high school,
00:45:03.750 --> 00:45:06.750
it's now the whole world,
and the whole world is your phone.
00:45:06.833 --> 00:45:08.708
Yeah. I mean, that's exactly it.
00:45:08.791 --> 00:45:10.541
- That's it.
- Yeah, it's pretty sad.
00:45:10.625 --> 00:45:14.250
No! This is, like, amazing.
This is like a shortcut.
00:45:14.333 --> 00:45:17.500
Wow, I immediately regret
showing you this.
00:45:17.583 --> 00:45:19.750
Just to be clear,
this is a way for people to pretend
00:45:19.833 --> 00:45:22.000
their life and skin texture
is better than it is.
00:45:22.083 --> 00:45:25.708
Is that why you've posted this picture
of you with this random hot chick?
00:45:25.791 --> 00:45:28.625
No, that's my ex-fiancée Diana.
00:45:28.708 --> 00:45:30.458
- You were engaged?
- I was.
00:45:30.541 --> 00:45:33.125
- Shut up! Seth.
- Uh-huh.
00:45:33.208 --> 00:45:35.041
That's actually how I ended up here.
00:45:35.125 --> 00:45:37.916
We both were working
at the National Archives in DC,
00:45:38.000 --> 00:45:40.333
and when we split up, I needed a change.
00:45:40.416 --> 00:45:42.958
So Martha got me a job at Harding,
and here I am.
00:45:43.041 --> 00:45:45.583
Trust me, being close to 40
and back at my high school
00:45:45.666 --> 00:45:47.267
isn't exactly where I wanted to be, but...
00:45:47.291 --> 00:45:50.083
- Oh. Tell me about it!
- Yeah, right!
00:45:50.166 --> 00:45:53.458
Uh, well, I should get back
to enriching young minds.
00:45:53.541 --> 00:45:55.291
Just kidding. I'm covering a drama class.
00:45:55.375 --> 00:45:56.625
- I'll see you later.
- Okay.
00:45:56.708 --> 00:45:58.708
- All right. Oh!
- Bye!
00:46:02.000 --> 00:46:04.166
Need that back. Yeah, thanks, Steph.
00:46:05.333 --> 00:46:06.500
Please, Dad!
00:46:07.041 --> 00:46:09.333
Phones are like the new Tamagotchis.
00:46:09.416 --> 00:46:13.875
Okay? I need one, and I promise you,
I will not go over the minutes.
00:46:13.958 --> 00:46:17.791
Really, it's for my own personal safety,
'cause what happens if I get kidnapped?
00:46:17.875 --> 00:46:21.250
I think if you get kidnapped, Stephanie,
they'll probably take your phone.
00:46:21.333 --> 00:46:23.916
Not if I'd hidden it up my...
00:46:24.000 --> 00:46:27.416
Well, just to be safe,
it's probably a good thing.
00:46:28.041 --> 00:46:29.166
I got you this.
00:46:30.833 --> 00:46:32.916
Oh my God.
00:46:37.333 --> 00:46:38.333
Dad...
00:46:39.708 --> 00:46:41.375
- Thank you!
- You're welcome.
00:46:41.458 --> 00:46:43.375
Oh, you're the best dad!
00:46:46.000 --> 00:46:48.500
Dad, I can't believe this!
00:46:49.333 --> 00:46:51.833
Hey, guys, uh, it's just me, Stephanie.
00:46:51.916 --> 00:46:54.333
I'm just chilling at my crib.
00:46:54.416 --> 00:46:56.083
I don't even know how to do this.
00:46:56.166 --> 00:47:00.875
I was just thinking that we should bring
prom queen back to Harding High.
00:47:00.958 --> 00:47:02.375
#AwesomeIdea.
00:47:02.458 --> 00:47:04.208
#Yes.
00:47:04.291 --> 00:47:07.208
Spread it around. Let's make it a virus.
00:47:07.291 --> 00:47:08.541
That's... that's cute.
00:47:08.625 --> 00:47:10.851
Remember to vote
for this year's prom theme.
00:47:10.875 --> 00:47:13.291
The choices are A, Bridgerton,
00:47:13.375 --> 00:47:14.875
B, pride,
00:47:14.958 --> 00:47:18.750
and a last-minute write-in submission
by Stephanie Conway, C,
00:47:18.833 --> 00:47:20.750
The Real World: New Orleans.
00:47:21.333 --> 00:47:23.625
- Democracy works only if you vote!
- What?
00:47:23.708 --> 00:47:26.416
- Stop, stop, stop.
- Love you all!
00:47:26.500 --> 00:47:28.226
- Oh my God.
- Are you going over there?
00:47:28.250 --> 00:47:29.291
- Okay.
- So fire.
00:47:29.375 --> 00:47:31.625
Let's wait
until the party to tell everyone.
00:47:31.708 --> 00:47:34.541
Oh my God,
is there a party happening? Whoo!
00:47:34.625 --> 00:47:37.625
Oh. Hi, Stephanie. What's up?
00:47:37.708 --> 00:47:40.958
I just came to say we're, like, cool.
00:47:41.041 --> 00:47:43.841
Okay? Even after the other day
when you, like, said I was old and shit.
00:47:43.875 --> 00:47:46.083
Oh, did you think that was mean?
00:47:46.166 --> 00:47:47.458
I am so sorry.
00:47:47.541 --> 00:47:48.791
I was just shedding light
00:47:48.875 --> 00:47:50.833
on an often overlooked
discrimination issue.
00:47:50.916 --> 00:47:52.208
Look, okay, I get.
00:47:52.291 --> 00:47:55.541
Queen bee feels very threatened
by the hot new girl
00:47:55.625 --> 00:47:57.458
and decides to go on the offensive.
00:47:57.541 --> 00:48:00.375
Classic Sandy/Rizzo.
It was the same way with your mum.
00:48:00.458 --> 00:48:03.250
I am not my mom. I'm nothing like her.
00:48:03.333 --> 00:48:06.750
So whatever went on between you two
has nothing to do with me.
00:48:06.833 --> 00:48:11.041
Awesome. Okay, so now that we're friends,
can you follow me on Insta?
00:48:11.125 --> 00:48:16.666
I'm "A" with this little circle around it
hot coma girl 113.
00:48:16.750 --> 00:48:19.583
Who knew?
There's 112 other hot coma girls.
00:48:19.666 --> 00:48:23.125
Mm-hmm. Okay, so I get this request a lot.
00:48:23.208 --> 00:48:25.416
Um, I limit my follows,
00:48:25.500 --> 00:48:28.083
'cause if I follow one person,
another might get mad,
00:48:28.166 --> 00:48:31.166
so it's a sacrifice I make
for everyone's mental health.
00:48:31.250 --> 00:48:33.291
Um, but good luck getting followers.
00:48:33.375 --> 00:48:36.041
Okay.
Well, wait, can you follow me?
00:48:36.750 --> 00:48:38.666
Can I follow her on Instagram?
00:48:38.750 --> 00:48:39.750
No.
00:48:40.083 --> 00:48:40.958
I can't.
00:48:41.041 --> 00:48:42.583
Sorry.
00:48:53.291 --> 00:48:54.666
Hey, Steph.
00:48:54.750 --> 00:48:57.416
- Holy shit. Mmm.
- Um, I'm doing a makeup tutorial.
00:48:57.500 --> 00:48:59.500
For who? Batman villains?
00:48:59.583 --> 00:49:01.708
I'm just really needing
some new followers.
00:49:01.791 --> 00:49:04.458
You don't realize
how many people don't care about you
00:49:04.541 --> 00:49:06.416
until you see it
as a number on your phone.
00:49:06.500 --> 00:49:10.166
Okay. Well, if you get tired
of being an influencer,
00:49:10.250 --> 00:49:13.708
the Natural History Museum is showing
Deep Impact on their IMAX all week.
00:49:13.791 --> 00:49:15.500
So, maybe we could go this weekend?
00:49:15.583 --> 00:49:17.625
Deep Impact again?
00:49:17.708 --> 00:49:21.541
Oh my God. You, me, and Martha
just watched that a couple weekends ago.
00:49:22.875 --> 00:49:26.250
Oh no, actually, I think you're thinking
of 1,000 weekends ago.
00:49:27.458 --> 00:49:29.416
Oh. Right.
00:49:29.500 --> 00:49:33.291
Mm. Okay, I would go,
but I've got a party this weekend.
00:49:33.375 --> 00:49:36.875
Oh, cool. Uh, you know, what night?
I'm completely free.
00:49:36.958 --> 00:49:40.500
I don't actually know yet,
so I'm just keeping my schedule open.
00:49:40.583 --> 00:49:42.666
Right.
00:49:43.208 --> 00:49:44.250
Just to be clear,
00:49:44.333 --> 00:49:46.767
you're saying no to attend
a party you haven't been invited to
00:49:46.791 --> 00:49:48.511
and don't know
when or where it's happening?
00:49:48.541 --> 00:49:51.291
Yeah. Okay, I gotta get back
to my contouring.
00:49:54.000 --> 00:49:55.000
All right.
00:49:58.291 --> 00:49:59.708
So hot.
00:49:59.791 --> 00:50:02.416
I mean, even just an hour a night,
that would be amazing.
00:50:02.500 --> 00:50:04.000
- I can make that happen.
- Yeah.
00:50:04.083 --> 00:50:05.083
Okay.
00:50:06.875 --> 00:50:07.875
What's going on?
00:50:08.916 --> 00:50:12.541
Why are you guys acting sus?
What? Don't say...
00:50:13.291 --> 00:50:16.916
Are you two together? Oh my God.
I'm not calling you Mum!
00:50:17.000 --> 00:50:20.291
Martha tells me you're already
falling behind in your classes.
00:50:20.375 --> 00:50:22.833
Are you doing crack cocaine?
00:50:22.916 --> 00:50:24.166
No.
00:50:24.250 --> 00:50:27.208
Dad, I'm just still adjusting.
00:50:28.000 --> 00:50:30.833
I just found out there were
eight more Fast and Furious movies.
00:50:30.916 --> 00:50:34.375
I just wanna make sure that you're giving
your schoolwork the attention it deserves.
00:50:34.458 --> 00:50:36.625
Well, I've just been really busy
00:50:36.708 --> 00:50:38.875
with super important stuff,
like making friends.
00:50:38.958 --> 00:50:41.500
- Well, good. I'm... That's great.
- Mm-hmm.
00:50:41.583 --> 00:50:43.583
- But you can still do your homework.
- Yep!
00:50:43.666 --> 00:50:46.041
You're smart, Steph,
always have been.
00:50:46.125 --> 00:50:48.625
I don't wanna see you
use this second chance incorrectly.
00:50:48.708 --> 00:50:51.458
Okay. Well, I've got
the solution for this.
00:50:51.541 --> 00:50:52.916
No phone for the weekend.
00:50:53.000 --> 00:50:54.500
- What?
- Mm-hmm.
00:50:55.541 --> 00:50:57.375
Dad, no. How else will I live?
00:50:57.458 --> 00:51:00.000
You survived 20 years without solid food.
00:51:00.083 --> 00:51:02.208
You can go for a weekend
without your iPhone, hon.
00:51:02.291 --> 00:51:03.708
- No!
- Hand it over.
00:51:03.791 --> 00:51:06.083
- Are you being serious?
- Yes. I am being very...
00:51:06.166 --> 00:51:08.041
Are you being full serious right now?
00:51:08.125 --> 00:51:10.000
- Full serious.
- Are you from Syria?
00:51:10.083 --> 00:51:11.125
I'm very serious.
00:51:11.208 --> 00:51:12.458
No!
00:51:13.875 --> 00:51:14.875
No!
00:51:14.958 --> 00:51:17.500
- Hand me the phone.
- Here, have it, then. Have it.
00:51:18.375 --> 00:51:19.208
It's a remote.
00:51:19.291 --> 00:51:21.958
- No!
- Uh...
00:51:22.041 --> 00:51:25.291
- Get off the door frame, honey.
- No! It's my phone!
00:51:25.375 --> 00:51:26.541
Give him the phone.
00:51:26.625 --> 00:51:27.708
No...
00:51:32.750 --> 00:51:34.708
Thanks a lot, Principal Martha.
00:51:35.208 --> 00:51:37.791
Oh my God, Lance and Bri look so hot.
00:51:37.875 --> 00:51:40.458
What the slut? They're all there.
00:51:40.541 --> 00:51:42.416
Can I... can I have my phone back now?
00:51:42.500 --> 00:51:44.208
Oh my God.
00:51:44.291 --> 00:51:46.625
Guys, what kind of psycho world is this
00:51:46.708 --> 00:51:49.708
where the cheerleaders
don't get invited to a party? Hello!
00:51:49.791 --> 00:51:51.833
Are they stupid? We are the party!
00:51:51.916 --> 00:51:53.666
Babe, of course we weren't invited.
00:51:53.750 --> 00:51:55.416
- It's DM VIP.
- Yeah.
00:51:55.500 --> 00:51:57.583
You only get to go to them
if they follow you.
00:51:57.666 --> 00:51:58.916
Only the hot, cool people.
00:51:59.000 --> 00:52:01.500
- Yeah.
- Well, yeah, but we are hot and cool.
00:52:01.583 --> 00:52:02.916
- Thank you.
- Um,
00:52:03.000 --> 00:52:05.458
four years of not getting invited
to those parties,
00:52:05.541 --> 00:52:08.416
the message gets, like, very clear.
We're not.
00:52:09.125 --> 00:52:12.791
This is kind of like a party.
I can have my dad pop in a Di.
00:52:14.916 --> 00:52:16.041
It means "DiGiorno."
00:52:16.125 --> 00:52:18.833
- Oh, oh, oh.
- No, I'm talking about a "party" party.
01:36:55.896 --> 01:36:58.266
Thanks for meeting me, doc.
00:52:22.625 --> 00:52:25.833
and discredit me when I run for office,
like they did with AOC.
00:52:25.916 --> 00:52:26.916
No.
00:52:27.541 --> 00:52:31.625
Okay, guys, you need to listen up,
all right? This is now serious.
00:52:33.666 --> 00:52:37.250
We need to dance
because we need to show everybody
00:52:37.333 --> 00:52:38.666
that we are the cool ones.
00:52:38.750 --> 00:52:42.708
Guys, when I was in high school,
all the popular kids treated me like shit
00:52:42.791 --> 00:52:44.583
until I showed them how cool I was,
00:52:44.666 --> 00:52:48.708
which is so cool that
the most popular girl in high school,
00:52:48.791 --> 00:52:51.458
her boyfriend dumped her for me.
00:52:52.291 --> 00:52:54.416
- And you know who that was?
- Who?
00:52:55.333 --> 00:52:57.041
- Bri's mom.
- Tiffany?
00:52:58.083 --> 00:52:59.083
And that guy,
00:53:00.458 --> 00:53:01.291
Bri's dad.
00:53:01.375 --> 00:53:03.291
♪ Oh my God ♪
00:53:03.375 --> 00:53:04.791
What?
00:53:04.875 --> 00:53:10.000
And once you've blown someone's dad,
you realize they're not that scary.
00:53:10.083 --> 00:53:11.208
- Hmm.
- Good to know.
00:53:11.291 --> 00:53:12.416
Yeah, I mean...
00:53:12.500 --> 00:53:16.875
So, everybody, watch and learn.
00:53:16.958 --> 00:53:17.958
- Let's dance.
- Okay.
00:53:18.000 --> 00:53:20.541
Okay, can you hit play?
Yeah, nice fingering.
00:53:23.083 --> 00:53:24.625
♪ Crazy ♪
00:53:25.166 --> 00:53:29.500
♪ Baby, I'm so into you ♪
00:53:30.166 --> 00:53:34.250
♪ You got that something
What can I do? ♪
00:53:34.833 --> 00:53:39.041
♪ Baby, you spin me around ♪
00:53:39.125 --> 00:53:41.500
- Yeah. Okay, get into it, guys.
- ♪ The earth is moving ♪
00:53:41.583 --> 00:53:43.864
- ♪ But I can't feel the ground ♪
- Like, hips, shoulders.
00:53:44.416 --> 00:53:48.666
♪ Every time you look at me ♪
00:53:49.250 --> 00:53:51.041
♪ My heart is jumping ♪
00:53:51.125 --> 00:53:52.875
♪ It's easy to see ♪
00:53:52.958 --> 00:53:55.625
♪ You drive me crazy ♪
00:53:55.708 --> 00:53:57.666
♪ I just can't sleep ♪
00:53:58.458 --> 00:54:00.375
♪ I'm so excited ♪
00:54:00.458 --> 00:54:02.166
♪ I'm in too deep ♪
00:54:02.250 --> 00:54:05.000
♪ Whoa, oh, oh, crazy ♪
00:54:05.083 --> 00:54:07.500
♪ But it feels all right ♪
00:54:08.208 --> 00:54:11.958
♪ Baby, thinking of you
Keeps me up all night ♪
00:54:14.416 --> 00:54:15.416
♪ Oh ♪
00:54:16.541 --> 00:54:18.458
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
00:54:19.500 --> 00:54:21.750
♪ You drive me crazy ♪
00:54:21.833 --> 00:54:24.208
- ♪ Oh ♪
- Sing it!
00:54:24.291 --> 00:54:27.125
- ♪ Oh, crazy ♪
- Yeah!
00:54:27.708 --> 00:54:29.166
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
00:54:29.666 --> 00:54:33.333
♪ Ooh, ooh ♪
00:54:33.416 --> 00:54:36.625
Stop!
00:54:39.083 --> 00:54:43.625
♪ Ooh, oh, yeah ♪
00:54:44.208 --> 00:54:48.500
♪ You drive me crazy, baby ♪
00:54:48.583 --> 00:54:52.208
♪ Get excited, I'm in too deep ♪
00:54:52.291 --> 00:54:53.750
♪ Oh ♪
00:54:53.833 --> 00:54:58.125
♪ Oh my, it feels all right ♪
00:54:58.208 --> 00:55:02.166
♪ Baby, thinking of you
Keeps me up all night ♪
00:55:03.250 --> 00:55:05.958
All right, guys, we have a show to put on.
00:55:07.791 --> 00:55:09.291
Please don't blow my dad.
00:55:12.375 --> 00:55:15.416
Now, don't worry.
I've spoken with the school nurse,
00:55:15.500 --> 00:55:17.833
and with less than three weeks
until graduation,
00:55:17.916 --> 00:55:22.000
we are prepared
for an epidemic of senioritis.
00:55:24.750 --> 00:55:26.333
Freshmen suck.
00:55:27.125 --> 00:55:31.000
Um, okay. So without further ado,
please join me in welcoming
00:55:31.083 --> 00:55:34.666
the president of the Harding High PTA,
Tiffany Balbo.
00:55:42.333 --> 00:55:43.500
Hi!
00:55:44.083 --> 00:55:45.125
Thank you.
00:55:45.208 --> 00:55:47.958
And I know she's the principal, boo.
00:55:48.041 --> 00:55:49.041
Boo.
00:55:49.083 --> 00:55:52.875
But give it up for Miss Riser, everyone.
00:55:52.958 --> 00:55:55.000
- Stop it.
- Sorry. Sorry.
00:55:55.083 --> 00:55:59.375
Okay. What a special evening
we get to share with our kids
00:55:59.458 --> 00:56:01.916
before they go off to adulthood.
00:56:02.000 --> 00:56:04.875
Okay, guys,
the energy in this place is sucking wiens.
00:56:04.958 --> 00:56:06.833
We need to get out there
and rock their worlds.
00:56:06.916 --> 00:56:07.958
Oh, and here's this.
00:56:08.041 --> 00:56:09.291
Huh?
00:56:09.375 --> 00:56:11.095
- It's the music for the routine.
- Oh, yes.
00:56:11.166 --> 00:56:14.208
Thank you for the computer tampon.
Shove that where that goes.
00:56:14.291 --> 00:56:16.000
Really, guys, you're the bomb diggity.
00:56:16.083 --> 00:56:17.291
- All of you.
- Aw!
00:56:17.375 --> 00:56:20.166
I love you,
and we're gonna crush the sluts and...
00:56:20.250 --> 00:56:24.083
Oh, it's the big finale, you guys.
It's the big finale!
00:56:24.166 --> 00:56:25.625
I'm so proud of you.
00:56:25.708 --> 00:56:28.000
You pumped to go out there
and change some minds?
00:56:29.041 --> 00:56:31.916
And just remember, this is all I have.
00:56:36.833 --> 00:56:39.833
And real quick,
due to the custom table-scapes,
00:56:39.916 --> 00:56:43.791
the prom ticket prices have gone
from $48 to $93.
00:56:43.875 --> 00:56:46.333
We take Venmo and PayPal and Zelle.
00:56:46.416 --> 00:56:47.666
Thank you so much!
00:56:50.958 --> 00:56:52.333
Yeah!
00:56:52.416 --> 00:56:54.291
Okay. Thank you, parents.
00:56:54.375 --> 00:56:55.916
Speaking of prom,
00:56:56.000 --> 00:56:59.666
making good choices is at the forefront
of every school function,
00:56:59.750 --> 00:57:03.583
so to help us illustrate that,
please welcome our radical Bulldogettes.
00:57:12.041 --> 00:57:13.708
- Ready?
- Consent!
00:57:13.791 --> 00:57:17.708
♪ C, O, N, S, E, N, T ♪
00:57:17.791 --> 00:57:21.458
♪ I don't touch you
And you don't touch me ♪
00:57:21.541 --> 00:57:23.708
♪ Unless we both fully agree ♪
00:57:23.791 --> 00:57:24.625
♪ Consent ♪
00:57:24.708 --> 00:57:26.500
Yeah!
00:57:27.041 --> 00:57:30.458
Let's go!
Let's hear it for consent!
00:57:32.208 --> 00:57:33.500
♪ Yeah ♪
00:57:33.583 --> 00:57:34.666
♪ Strike it up ♪
00:57:36.000 --> 00:57:37.083
♪ Yeah ♪
00:57:38.250 --> 00:57:40.916
- ♪ No, no, no, no ♪
- ♪ Yeah ♪
00:57:41.000 --> 00:57:42.166
♪ Strike it up ♪
00:57:42.250 --> 00:57:43.750
♪ No ♪
00:57:44.291 --> 00:57:45.791
♪ No means no ♪
00:57:48.916 --> 00:57:50.708
Are you ready for the remix?
00:57:51.291 --> 00:57:52.333
♪ One ♪
00:57:52.416 --> 00:57:54.541
♪ I can't help I was born like this ♪
00:57:54.625 --> 00:57:56.291
♪ Ain't my fault that you want my drip ♪
00:57:56.375 --> 00:57:58.375
♪ Little bitter bitch
Could have been my friend ♪
00:57:58.458 --> 00:58:00.583
♪ Now you gotta listen
While I pop my shit ♪
00:58:00.666 --> 00:58:02.750
♪ Fast, I'm coming in fast ♪
00:58:02.833 --> 00:58:04.458
♪ First place, you coming in last ♪
00:58:04.541 --> 00:58:06.875
♪ I'm hitting that, hitting that gas ♪
00:58:06.958 --> 00:58:08.791
♪ I'm hitting that, hitting that ♪
00:58:08.875 --> 00:58:10.583
♪ Locomotion ♪
00:58:10.666 --> 00:58:12.750
♪ We causing a commotion ♪
00:58:12.833 --> 00:58:16.875
♪ I put it in, I put it in
I put it in motion ♪
00:58:16.958 --> 00:58:19.375
♪ I put it in, I put it in ♪
00:58:19.458 --> 00:58:21.125
- ♪ I put it in motion ♪
- Oh my God.
00:58:21.208 --> 00:58:22.833
♪ My back is aching, my bra too tight ♪
00:58:22.916 --> 00:58:25.250
♪ You mad as hell that I shine so bright ♪
00:58:25.333 --> 00:58:27.166
♪ My back is aching, my bra too tight ♪
00:58:27.250 --> 00:58:29.375
♪ Ass jiggling, I know that's right ♪
00:58:29.458 --> 00:58:33.416
♪ Cah, ah, ah, ah, ah, consent ♪
00:58:35.000 --> 00:58:38.583
- Did they just touch their...
- Just shut up. Shut up.
00:58:38.666 --> 00:58:39.833
Yeah!
00:58:40.958 --> 00:58:44.041
Bulldogs, fuck yeah! Yeah! Whoo!
00:58:44.125 --> 00:58:47.666
- You are a father.
- They brought it back. I am a father.
00:58:48.458 --> 00:58:49.458
Ooh.
00:58:55.166 --> 00:58:57.500
- Damn, Conway!
- Oh!
00:58:58.083 --> 00:59:00.500
- Blaine! Oh my God! Oh my God.
- Whoo!
00:59:00.583 --> 00:59:01.958
Watching you up there.
00:59:02.041 --> 00:59:03.791
- Shut up.
- No, it's true!
00:59:03.875 --> 00:59:05.750
- Shut up! Look at you!
- Yeah?
00:59:05.833 --> 00:59:07.153
Look at you now. You're such a...
00:59:07.208 --> 00:59:09.625
I'm a DILF. I know. Who would've thought?
00:59:09.708 --> 00:59:10.916
- Hmm.
- Hmm.
00:59:11.000 --> 00:59:13.625
Oh, and I wanted to say
I thought it was so cool
00:59:13.708 --> 00:59:16.416
that I was one of the first places
you stopped when you woke up.
00:59:16.500 --> 00:59:19.708
I can't tell you how many times
I've thought of you over the past years.
00:59:19.791 --> 00:59:20.833
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
00:59:22.125 --> 00:59:23.965
Well, even though
I was pretty much brain-dead,
00:59:24.000 --> 00:59:25.875
you were the one
that kept my heart beating.
00:59:25.958 --> 00:59:29.333
Well, listen, I'll just say,
you let me know
00:59:29.416 --> 00:59:32.500
if you ever want to take
another trip down memory Blaine.
00:59:32.583 --> 00:59:34.916
- Yeah, but, Blaine, what about Tiff?
- Eh.
00:59:35.500 --> 00:59:37.166
Didn't stop us the first time.
00:59:38.083 --> 00:59:40.125
What? You said you two were broken up.
00:59:40.208 --> 00:59:42.375
It's, uh... You know, I don't...
00:59:45.083 --> 00:59:46.267
- What?
- I was joking.
00:59:46.291 --> 00:59:49.208
I haven't forgotten
about your whole "no cheating" rule.
00:59:49.291 --> 00:59:52.041
Yeah, which is why we can't be together.
00:59:53.333 --> 00:59:54.333
Yet.
00:59:55.416 --> 00:59:57.291
But if you're the man
that I think you are...
00:59:59.583 --> 01:00:01.458
I'm sure you'll make the right choice.
01:00:01.541 --> 01:00:02.958
Yeah. No, I...
01:00:04.041 --> 01:00:05.041
Oh, sh...
01:00:06.375 --> 01:00:07.375
Hmm.
01:00:14.416 --> 01:00:15.250
Conway.
01:00:17.708 --> 01:00:18.708
♪ Let's go, girls ♪
01:00:22.041 --> 01:00:23.041
♪ Come on ♪
01:00:26.000 --> 01:00:27.833
♪ I'm going out tonight ♪
01:00:27.916 --> 01:00:30.000
♪ I'm feelin' all right ♪
01:00:30.083 --> 01:00:34.000
♪ Gonna let it all hang out ♪
01:00:34.083 --> 01:00:37.875
♪ Wanna make some noise
Really raise my voice ♪
01:00:37.958 --> 01:00:41.791
♪ Yeah, I wanna scream and shout ♪
01:00:41.875 --> 01:00:44.500
Stephanie,
can you come down here, please?
01:00:45.625 --> 01:00:47.125
♪ No inhibitions ♪
01:00:47.208 --> 01:00:49.500
♪ Make no conditions... ♪
01:00:50.083 --> 01:00:53.500
"Stephanie, we support
Instagram stars like you
01:00:53.583 --> 01:00:56.166
who share Hostess' commitment
to never growing old."
01:00:56.250 --> 01:00:58.041
♪ I only wanna have... ♪
01:00:58.125 --> 01:01:01.500
"Warmest wishes from your friends
at Canada Goose." That is sick!
01:01:02.333 --> 01:01:03.375
"Let's be buds."
01:01:04.083 --> 01:01:06.083
Holy shit.
01:01:06.166 --> 01:01:08.666
♪ Is the prerogative
To have a little fun and ♪
01:01:09.250 --> 01:01:12.375
♪ Oh-oh-oh, go totally crazy ♪
01:01:12.458 --> 01:01:14.875
♪ Forget I'm a lady ♪
01:01:14.958 --> 01:01:17.125
♪ Men's shirts, short skirts ♪
01:01:17.208 --> 01:01:19.333
♪ Oh-oh-oh, really go wild ♪
01:01:19.416 --> 01:01:22.791
♪ Yeah, doin' it in style ♪
01:01:22.875 --> 01:01:25.416
♪ Oh-oh-oh, I wanna be free ♪
01:01:25.500 --> 01:01:29.333
♪ Yeah, to feel the way I feel ♪
01:01:29.833 --> 01:01:32.500
♪ Man, I feel like a woman ♪
01:01:32.583 --> 01:01:35.541
I don't get what the big deal was.
We were just dancing!
01:01:35.625 --> 01:01:39.791
Steph, the big deal is that I told you
that we don't do that anymore,
01:01:39.875 --> 01:01:42.250
and you went
and did it anyway behind my back.
01:01:42.333 --> 01:01:45.000
Are you really mad?
Or is this because Tiff yelled at you?
01:01:45.083 --> 01:01:45.958
Oh, Steph!
01:01:46.041 --> 01:01:48.625
You can't let her bully you,
I've always said that.
01:01:48.708 --> 01:01:50.250
It's not about Tiffany.
01:01:50.333 --> 01:01:51.375
I care about this
01:01:51.458 --> 01:01:54.833
because what you did up there,
it wasn't school-appropriate.
01:01:54.916 --> 01:01:56.000
You fondled yourself
01:01:56.083 --> 01:01:59.166
for an unsuspecting audience
in a routine about consent.
01:01:59.250 --> 01:02:01.416
But I gave myself consent
01:02:02.000 --> 01:02:03.583
to do that to myself.
01:02:03.666 --> 01:02:05.458
Stop stroking your nipples.
01:02:05.541 --> 01:02:07.291
Marth, what is going on here?
01:02:07.375 --> 01:02:09.250
The cheerleaders aren't allowed to dance.
01:02:09.333 --> 01:02:10.833
You took away prom queen.
01:02:10.916 --> 01:02:13.833
You turned the cafeteria
into a Hogwarts without the magic.
01:02:13.916 --> 01:02:15.750
Are you trying
to make this place suck wiens?
01:02:15.833 --> 01:02:19.958
Number one, how dare you?
It is like Hogwarts with the magic.
01:02:20.541 --> 01:02:24.750
And number two,
it doesn't suck wiens. It's nice.
01:02:24.833 --> 01:02:26.791
It's... it's nice here.
01:02:26.875 --> 01:02:29.833
- I had more fun in a coma.
- You did not have more fun in the coma.
01:02:29.916 --> 01:02:32.250
I had more fun going like this.
01:02:34.708 --> 01:02:35.708
Stephanie.
01:02:35.750 --> 01:02:38.333
That was way more fun
than this high school.
01:02:38.416 --> 01:02:43.166
Steph, this may come as a shock to you,
but for most kids, high school sucks.
01:02:43.250 --> 01:02:46.916
I don't know why you're acting
like we didn't have the same experience.
01:02:47.000 --> 01:02:48.583
High school was awesome!
01:02:48.666 --> 01:02:53.125
Freshman year, you bailed on Seth and I
to go be some popular girl.
01:02:53.208 --> 01:02:56.666
No, I didn't bail. I just got more friends
01:02:56.750 --> 01:02:58.916
and a really hot boyfriend.
01:02:59.000 --> 01:03:01.541
Seriously, if you'd had a boyfriend,
you would have understood.
01:03:01.625 --> 01:03:04.875
Stephanie, I wouldn't understand
because I'm gay.
01:03:04.958 --> 01:03:07.351
Ooh, you can't say that word,
unless you're saying it
01:03:07.375 --> 01:03:10.708
in a neutral-positive way
to refer to someone that is...
01:03:13.250 --> 01:03:14.375
Mm-hmm.
01:03:15.708 --> 01:03:16.708
Oh.
01:03:17.666 --> 01:03:18.500
Yeah.
01:03:18.583 --> 01:03:23.208
And it... it made high school
a living hell for me.
01:03:25.000 --> 01:03:26.708
Back then, I felt very alone
01:03:27.708 --> 01:03:32.375
and angry and so threatened
01:03:32.458 --> 01:03:38.083
that if I showed one iota of my real self,
then I would be ripped to shreds
01:03:39.375 --> 01:03:43.041
by Tiffany or Blaine or you.
01:03:43.625 --> 01:03:44.625
Me?
01:03:45.750 --> 01:03:47.875
No way. Why would you even say that?
01:03:47.958 --> 01:03:51.541
Because, Steph,
sometimes I didn't know who you were.
01:03:53.208 --> 01:03:54.833
Or... are.
01:03:56.166 --> 01:03:57.291
Look, let's...
01:03:57.375 --> 01:03:59.583
There's three weeks left
of the school year.
01:03:59.666 --> 01:04:03.000
So let's just get through those
as peacefully as possible,
01:04:03.083 --> 01:04:06.500
and then I can go
to my family's lake house for the summer.
01:04:08.958 --> 01:04:12.916
The periodic table
is made up of 119 elements.
01:04:13.000 --> 01:04:16.666
Oh, hey, space nerds. JK, JK.
01:04:16.750 --> 01:04:20.000
Any of you want to come see Deep Impact
with me and Blaine this weekend?
01:04:20.583 --> 01:04:23.291
As part of my collab
with the Natural History Museum,
01:04:23.375 --> 01:04:28.166
you will get 20% off ticket prices
and complimentary space ice cream.
01:04:28.250 --> 01:04:30.833
So come watch
the end of the world with us.
01:04:30.916 --> 01:04:33.666
Remember it just for me. Please.
01:04:33.750 --> 01:04:36.250
No one's gonna read you.
01:04:38.250 --> 01:04:40.416
Oh boy,
no one's gonna read you.
01:04:41.166 --> 01:04:42.708
Are you talking to the books?
01:04:43.208 --> 01:04:46.416
- Oh, yeah, I find it helps them grow.
- Still a dork.
01:04:46.500 --> 01:04:48.375
- Huh.
- So...
01:04:48.458 --> 01:04:49.458
Uh,
01:04:50.000 --> 01:04:53.041
do you, like, still wanna see Deep Impact?
01:04:54.791 --> 01:04:56.166
I'm gonna get some popcorn.
01:04:56.250 --> 01:05:00.875
Maybe some freeze-dried space ice cream.
Maybe some Milk Duds, some Whoppers,
01:05:00.958 --> 01:05:04.083
some Juicy Fruit.
I gotta keep this girlish figure.
01:05:04.166 --> 01:05:05.708
You want anything, or...
01:05:05.791 --> 01:05:09.333
Um, oh, no, no, no, don't go just yet.
Just hang here for one second.
01:05:09.416 --> 01:05:10.416
Yeah, sure.
01:05:10.458 --> 01:05:14.791
Oh my God, Seth, you're such a gentleman
going to get the snacks.
01:05:14.875 --> 01:05:17.708
Oh my God, I swear,
you have such a massive dick.
01:05:17.791 --> 01:05:20.833
- What did you say?
- What? Oh, Blaine, Tiffany.
01:05:20.916 --> 01:05:22.958
- Hi!
- Hi! What are you doing here?
01:05:23.041 --> 01:05:24.458
What a coincidence.
01:05:24.541 --> 01:05:27.125
I'm, um, here on a date with Seth.
01:05:27.208 --> 01:05:29.416
He asked me out, and I said,
01:05:29.500 --> 01:05:32.958
"You know what? I am single
and so horny, so yes."
01:05:33.041 --> 01:05:34.875
- Isn't that right?
- Yep.
01:05:34.958 --> 01:05:35.833
Really?
01:05:35.916 --> 01:05:38.208
Wait, I'm sorry.
You are on a date with Sethany?
01:05:38.291 --> 01:05:40.916
Well, it's just Seth.
01:05:41.000 --> 01:05:44.041
Relax. I'm just joking.
01:05:44.125 --> 01:05:46.666
Well, yeah,
we're just here to see a movie.
01:05:46.750 --> 01:05:49.291
It's not like
we're gonna have hot, consensual sex
01:05:49.375 --> 01:05:50.583
when the lights go down.
01:05:50.666 --> 01:05:53.333
Mm-hmm. Hmm. Hmm?
01:05:53.416 --> 01:05:55.041
Wow! Uh...
01:05:55.125 --> 01:05:58.541
Wow, Seth, it only took 20 years
and some brain damage,
01:05:58.625 --> 01:06:01.375
but she finally agreed
to go out with you. Way to go!
01:06:02.083 --> 01:06:04.250
Again, just joking.
01:06:06.416 --> 01:06:08.226
- Hilarious.
- Let's go find our seats.
01:06:08.250 --> 01:06:10.333
- Huh?
- Let's go find our seats.
01:06:11.541 --> 01:06:14.458
- We gotta go find our seats.
- Down in front, yep.
01:06:14.541 --> 01:06:15.541
Yeah.
01:06:16.125 --> 01:06:18.041
- Oh, yeah.
- "Sethany."
01:06:27.583 --> 01:06:29.208
Feed me some popcorn.
01:06:30.375 --> 01:06:31.750
Are you serious about that?
01:06:32.541 --> 01:06:36.666
Yeah, just be awesome.
Just... just toss some into my mouth.
01:06:36.750 --> 01:06:37.750
All right.
01:06:42.791 --> 01:06:43.791
Seth!
01:06:44.750 --> 01:06:47.833
Oh my God. It's stuck in my throat.
Oh, I'm choking.
01:06:47.916 --> 01:06:50.726
- No, I really... I just got a Milk Dud.
- Did you actually choke on that?
01:06:50.750 --> 01:06:52.958
Yeah, it's stuck right there,
but it's all right.
01:06:53.041 --> 01:06:54.875
I thought that was
a euphemism kind of thing.
01:06:54.958 --> 01:06:56.833
- Fire tether pitons.
- Pitons fired.
01:07:10.666 --> 01:07:12.541
- Stop it.
- What?
01:07:12.625 --> 01:07:15.833
You're eye-fucking Stephanie so hard,
she'll need the morning-after pill.
01:07:15.916 --> 01:07:18.000
I am not eye-fucking anybody.
01:07:18.083 --> 01:07:21.916
It is embarrassing. Do you want me
to call Dr. Wilbin for more therapy?
01:07:22.000 --> 01:07:24.625
- Don't threaten me with a good time.
- Shut up!
01:07:24.708 --> 01:07:27.833
Bitch, turn your ugly face around
and watch the movie.
01:07:27.916 --> 01:07:29.836
Careful how you talk
to senior citizens.
01:07:29.916 --> 01:07:30.916
Shut up, Blaine.
01:07:31.000 --> 01:07:33.625
Ma'am, I'm gonna have
to ask you to be quiet.
01:07:33.708 --> 01:07:34.916
I am not the problem.
01:07:35.000 --> 01:07:37.416
There is a freaking porno
happening over there!
01:07:38.000 --> 01:07:40.041
- What?
- Don't put that on my face.
01:07:40.125 --> 01:07:42.291
It is not my fault.
I am not doing anything.
01:07:42.375 --> 01:07:45.541
Be quiet. I'm trying to watch the movie.
01:07:45.625 --> 01:07:47.500
You're afraid you'll miss something?
01:07:47.583 --> 01:07:48.958
The asteroid hits,
01:07:49.041 --> 01:07:53.125
and Téa Leoni and her Austrian dad
get hit by a ginormous wave.
01:07:53.208 --> 01:07:54.416
- Aw.
- What?
01:07:54.500 --> 01:07:57.375
Oh, come on! We all knew that!
01:07:57.458 --> 01:07:59.083
Can you...
01:07:59.833 --> 01:08:00.833
- Sorry.
- Ma'am?
01:08:00.916 --> 01:08:02.041
I...
01:08:02.125 --> 01:08:04.708
- Ma'am, come with me.
- Okay, fine. Blaine?
01:08:04.791 --> 01:08:06.708
What is the name of your manager?
01:08:07.208 --> 01:08:10.416
Sir? I am going to have
to email your manager.
01:08:15.958 --> 01:08:17.416
Ah!
01:08:17.500 --> 01:08:20.625
Two decades later, and I still love
watching Tiff lose her mind.
01:08:20.708 --> 01:08:24.416
- I mean, that was incredibly satisfying.
- Mm-hmm.
01:08:24.500 --> 01:08:25.625
Okay, now I understand
01:08:25.708 --> 01:08:28.458
why you devoted so much of your time
on it in high school.
01:08:28.541 --> 01:08:30.833
- Well, not the whole time.
- Oh?
01:08:30.916 --> 01:08:34.166
Just all of my junior,
sophomore, and most of my senior year.
01:08:34.250 --> 01:08:35.250
Mm. Mm-hmm.
01:08:35.708 --> 01:08:38.416
Anyways, Marth told me
something about you in high school.
01:08:38.500 --> 01:08:40.583
Oh God. What?
01:08:41.333 --> 01:08:44.166
She said that you had
a crush on me.
01:08:45.041 --> 01:08:46.041
Yes.
01:08:46.500 --> 01:08:50.208
When we were in high school,
I was very much in love with you.
01:08:50.291 --> 01:08:51.500
Seth!
01:08:51.583 --> 01:08:53.333
- Eh.
- You were? Really?
01:08:53.416 --> 01:08:55.916
- Eh.
- Why didn't you ever say anything?
01:08:56.000 --> 01:08:58.666
'Cause, you know,
we were friends.
01:08:58.750 --> 01:09:00.375
- Yeah.
- And you were with Blaine.
01:09:00.458 --> 01:09:03.375
And, you know, we both know
what your answer would've been.
01:09:03.458 --> 01:09:07.208
Maybe, maybe not.
We're hanging out right now, aren't we?
01:09:07.291 --> 01:09:10.916
Yeah, but that's only because you thought
you could use me to make Blaine jealous.
01:09:11.875 --> 01:09:14.958
Steph, come on. I'm a full-blown adult.
01:09:15.041 --> 01:09:17.875
I think I can recognize
a teenage trick when I see one.
01:09:17.958 --> 01:09:20.791
That's not what's going on.
01:09:20.875 --> 01:09:24.500
Oh, come on, you used to pull this with me
and Marth all the time in high school.
01:09:24.583 --> 01:09:27.625
You'd use our attention
to make the popular kids crave yours.
01:09:27.708 --> 01:09:29.416
Um, did I?
01:09:29.916 --> 01:09:30.750
Yes.
01:09:30.833 --> 01:09:34.208
We always wondered
if those kids ever got to really meet you.
01:09:34.875 --> 01:09:35.875
Like, the real you.
01:09:38.250 --> 01:09:40.875
Well, I did have
a really fun time tonight.
01:09:41.875 --> 01:09:43.208
I'm... I'm sorry.
01:09:43.291 --> 01:09:44.291
No, forget it.
01:09:44.875 --> 01:09:46.291
So should I take you home?
01:09:47.041 --> 01:09:51.041
Or we could continue to hang out.
I have an idea of where we could go.
01:09:54.000 --> 01:09:57.333
Whoa, okay. This place has changed.
01:09:57.916 --> 01:09:59.791
Yeah, I think the lights are just on.
01:10:00.791 --> 01:10:02.071
- Come on.
- Okay.
01:10:04.375 --> 01:10:06.041
Bri, baby, I need favor.
01:10:09.291 --> 01:10:12.416
I want you
to get prom king and queen reinstated.
01:10:13.833 --> 01:10:14.833
What?
01:10:15.750 --> 01:10:16.750
Mom.
01:10:17.125 --> 01:10:18.791
No. No one cares about that.
01:10:18.875 --> 01:10:19.875
I do.
01:10:20.416 --> 01:10:23.750
I want you to beat Steph for prom queen.
01:10:23.833 --> 01:10:26.750
You said it rewards archaic gender roles.
01:10:26.833 --> 01:10:32.750
Well, exactly, which is why
you need to be the woke prom queen.
01:10:33.916 --> 01:10:36.041
I've already got interest
from some brands,
01:10:36.125 --> 01:10:37.708
and they are supes into it.
01:10:37.791 --> 01:10:39.791
Mom. I'm not doing this.
01:10:39.875 --> 01:10:43.166
And don't say "woke" or "supes."
01:10:45.000 --> 01:10:46.541
Just beat Steph for mommy.
01:10:47.291 --> 01:10:48.458
You owe me.
01:10:48.541 --> 01:10:49.750
For what?
01:10:51.458 --> 01:10:52.500
For being alive.
01:10:52.583 --> 01:10:56.541
And if you wanna go on your trip to Nepal,
you will do this for me.
01:11:01.541 --> 01:11:03.375
- Can I ask you something?
- Hmm?
01:11:03.458 --> 01:11:06.219
Does it get exhausting trying to make
everybody like you all the time?
01:11:07.000 --> 01:11:08.000
Well,
01:11:09.208 --> 01:11:11.333
it will be worth it when I win prom queen.
01:11:11.416 --> 01:11:16.416
Well, what I remember about prom
is that it was overhyped,
01:11:17.166 --> 01:11:19.750
you weren't there, and it sucked.
01:11:19.833 --> 01:11:23.041
- That's your memories of prom. That's it?
- Yeah, pretty much.
01:11:23.125 --> 01:11:25.333
Seth! Dude, come on.
01:11:26.208 --> 01:11:29.351
Did you even try to have fun? Did you
even try to tear it up on the dance floor?
01:11:29.375 --> 01:11:32.083
- Just, like, give it the old groove? No!
- Yeah!
01:11:32.166 --> 01:11:35.416
It wouldn't have mattered,
because prom doesn't matter,
01:11:35.500 --> 01:11:37.458
especially not prom queen.
01:11:38.000 --> 01:11:39.083
You maniac.
01:11:39.166 --> 01:11:40.416
Come on, Steph.
01:11:40.500 --> 01:11:44.083
You will yourself out of a coma,
and that's what you care about?
01:11:44.166 --> 01:11:46.666
- It's more than just a crown to me.
- Hmm.
01:11:47.625 --> 01:11:49.625
When I moved here to America,
01:11:50.916 --> 01:11:51.958
it was so hard.
01:11:52.041 --> 01:11:55.458
- Everyone made fun of me, as you remember.
- Yeah.
01:11:55.541 --> 01:11:57.083
And then Mum got sick.
01:11:59.125 --> 01:12:02.375
And I was miserable. I was so miserable.
01:12:04.916 --> 01:12:07.625
And you know what she used to say
to help cheer me up?
01:12:08.458 --> 01:12:13.916
She'd, like, say, "Steph, close your eyes
and imagine your perfect life."
01:12:14.833 --> 01:12:17.458
"And if you can imagine it,
you can have it."
01:12:18.000 --> 01:12:19.875
I was like...
..."Shut up, Mom."
01:12:21.166 --> 01:12:22.458
I didn't believe her.
01:12:23.958 --> 01:12:25.125
Then she died.
01:12:28.791 --> 01:12:30.875
Then I was...
01:12:31.375 --> 01:12:34.833
I didn't tell anyone, but I was...
I was more miserable than ever.
01:12:37.750 --> 01:12:41.291
And then one day when we were driving
and I saw Deanna Russo,
01:12:41.375 --> 01:12:45.208
and I was like, "Whoa, she's happy."
01:12:45.833 --> 01:12:47.250
And she was prom queen,
01:12:48.000 --> 01:12:51.458
and I... I need to be her. Okay?
01:12:52.250 --> 01:12:54.333
I wanted to be her so badly.
01:12:55.541 --> 01:12:58.916
And I was getting there,
and then all of a sudden, boom.
01:12:59.916 --> 01:13:02.416
Coma. Lights out.
01:13:03.958 --> 01:13:06.458
And I was bloody miserable again.
01:13:08.083 --> 01:13:09.583
Then I thought, "Well...
01:13:13.291 --> 01:13:16.625
I should see if I can prove my mum right."
01:13:20.875 --> 01:13:26.375
"I should... I should really try
and get that perfect life," you know?
01:13:29.250 --> 01:13:32.291
Okay, definitely not just a crown.
Sorry about that. I'm an asshole.
01:13:32.875 --> 01:13:34.208
No, you're...
01:13:34.291 --> 01:13:36.583
- No, you're not.
- All right.
01:13:36.666 --> 01:13:40.333
- Oh!
- Oh! You did it. You got it!
01:13:40.416 --> 01:13:41.750
Oh my God, okay.
01:13:43.166 --> 01:13:45.708
Yeah!
01:13:45.791 --> 01:13:46.791
Woot, woot.
01:13:47.250 --> 01:13:49.541
- Oh my God!
- That's all yours. You can have that.
01:13:51.291 --> 01:13:54.583
♪ Now it's time to take my place... ♪
01:13:54.666 --> 01:13:56.125
Do you wanna go to prom with me?
01:13:59.750 --> 01:14:01.583
I promise you, you'll have a good time.
01:14:02.083 --> 01:14:06.791
Well, I already signed up
to be a chaperone, so, yeah, I'll go.
01:14:06.875 --> 01:14:07.875
- Yeah?
- Uh-huh.
01:14:08.291 --> 01:14:09.791
Awesome!
01:14:10.375 --> 01:14:11.875
- Great.
- Yeah.
01:14:11.958 --> 01:14:13.083
Okay. All right. Wait.
01:14:13.166 --> 01:14:15.184
- Let me try to win you something now.
- Okay. Yeah.
01:14:15.208 --> 01:14:17.333
Attention Harding High seniors,
01:14:17.416 --> 01:14:20.875
a petition
was just delivered to me by Bri Balbo,
01:14:21.541 --> 01:14:22.416
I mean, Luvs,
01:14:22.500 --> 01:14:26.166
um, officially reinstating
a king and queen election
01:14:26.250 --> 01:14:27.458
at this year's prom.
01:14:27.541 --> 01:14:29.500
- What? It's back!
- Prom?
01:14:29.583 --> 01:14:31.000
Oh my God!
01:14:31.083 --> 01:14:31.916
Oh my God!
01:14:32.000 --> 01:14:34.833
- Shut up!
- Oh my God!
01:14:34.916 --> 01:14:37.708
Obviously, I respect
the sacred privacy of student elections.
01:14:37.791 --> 01:14:41.166
- But I'm totally voting for you.
- Absolutely! Later, prom queen!
01:14:41.250 --> 01:14:42.916
Love you!
01:14:56.375 --> 01:14:57.625
Can you believe it?
01:14:58.625 --> 01:15:00.375
You might make history after all.
01:15:00.958 --> 01:15:05.291
The first person
to ever lose prom queen twice.
01:15:06.791 --> 01:15:09.208
Don't go chasing waterfalls, Steph.
01:15:09.708 --> 01:15:11.333
- Skank face.
- What was that?
01:15:12.708 --> 01:15:13.833
Oh, nothing.
01:15:15.041 --> 01:15:16.208
Slut bag.
01:15:16.708 --> 01:15:18.166
What did you just call me?
01:15:18.708 --> 01:15:20.291
- Nothing.
- Possum pussy.
01:15:20.375 --> 01:15:22.041
- Rumpel-slut-skin.
- Jizz collector.
01:15:22.125 --> 01:15:23.291
You're a sad wife.
01:15:23.375 --> 01:15:24.541
What did you say?
01:15:26.125 --> 01:15:28.250
I didn't say shit, but you heard me.
01:15:40.416 --> 01:15:41.916
Oh my God.
01:15:42.458 --> 01:15:44.666
It's an invite to a prom party at Bri's.
01:15:44.750 --> 01:15:46.541
- An invite?
- Check your phone!
01:15:47.541 --> 01:15:49.750
Oh my God! I got invited!
01:15:49.833 --> 01:15:51.625
- Can you believe that?
- We got invited!
01:15:51.708 --> 01:15:53.416
- Steve Aoki is DJing.
- Right?
01:15:53.500 --> 01:15:55.250
Steve Aoki? I love it!
01:15:55.333 --> 01:15:56.666
Oh my God!
01:16:00.125 --> 01:16:04.250
Steph. Steph, we're not gonna go probably
'cause, I mean, it's a $50 cover.
01:16:04.333 --> 01:16:06.250
- Oh, yeah.
- That's so expensive.
01:16:06.333 --> 01:16:07.333
I can't afford that.
01:16:07.416 --> 01:16:10.666
Why didn't you tell me we were hosting it?
I'd have got that aphrodisiac wine.
01:16:10.750 --> 01:16:12.166
I didn't know.
01:16:41.125 --> 01:16:41.958
Hi, guys.
01:16:42.041 --> 01:16:43.583
I am so pumped to announce
01:16:43.666 --> 01:16:46.833
that I will be hosting the biggest
and the best prom after-party
01:16:46.916 --> 01:16:48.541
at a supersecret locaish.
01:16:49.041 --> 01:16:51.250
It's free to get in, unlike Bri's.
01:16:52.166 --> 01:16:54.000
It's gonna be awesome.
01:16:54.083 --> 01:16:57.666
So, DM me a picture of your ballot
voting me as prom queen,
01:16:57.750 --> 01:16:59.708
and you'll get all the deets night of.
01:17:04.666 --> 01:17:06.250
This is weird for me too, sir.
01:17:17.875 --> 01:17:18.875
Stephie!
01:17:19.375 --> 01:17:21.208
Wanna hurry it up?
01:17:25.833 --> 01:17:26.875
You want a beer?
01:17:28.083 --> 01:17:30.583
Oh, uh, sure.
01:17:30.666 --> 01:17:33.125
Wrong answer, hot rod.
01:17:33.208 --> 01:17:35.500
You think I'll let you drink
and drive with my daughter?
01:17:36.250 --> 01:17:38.708
Oh, well, I'm actually not driving.
We're taking a Lyft.
01:17:38.791 --> 01:17:40.375
Oh, cool.
01:17:41.416 --> 01:17:44.916
Though I suspect Stephanie would prefer
not to spend her prom evening
01:17:45.000 --> 01:17:46.250
with a drunken fool.
01:17:46.333 --> 01:17:47.666
It would just be the o...
01:17:47.750 --> 01:17:50.750
No, I think I'm okay, actually.
I'll maybe have a water, if anything.
01:17:50.833 --> 01:17:52.750
Did you bring some condoms?
01:17:54.375 --> 01:17:56.083
Um, no.
01:17:56.166 --> 01:18:00.083
Hm. Didn't think we needed
to have this talk, but, uh, Seth,
01:18:00.166 --> 01:18:04.208
you are aware that unprotected sex
can lead to geriatric pregnancies?
01:18:04.291 --> 01:18:06.291
- Stephie!
- You ready to be an old dad?
01:18:06.375 --> 01:18:08.750
I'm sorry, do you want me
to sleep with your daughter?
01:18:08.833 --> 01:18:10.333
- Or...
- What did you just ask me?
01:18:10.416 --> 01:18:12.333
- It's...
- Okay, I'm ready!
01:18:24.333 --> 01:18:26.291
Mom chose great.
01:18:26.875 --> 01:18:28.083
Yeah.
01:18:29.541 --> 01:18:31.875
Going to prom.
01:18:31.958 --> 01:18:34.375
- Oh my God. Dad, stop it.
- Don't.
01:18:34.458 --> 01:18:38.083
Dad, stop it. You're embarrassing me.
01:18:38.166 --> 01:18:39.708
A bit higher on the angle.
01:18:39.791 --> 01:18:42.375
Dad, you're taking so many,
but take more, take more.
01:18:43.041 --> 01:18:44.416
- Boy band.
- ♪ Cover girl ♪
01:18:44.500 --> 01:18:45.750
Okay, Dad, that's enough.
01:18:45.833 --> 01:18:46.976
- Maybe just some of me?
- Oh.
01:18:48.125 --> 01:18:49.958
♪ On the runway ♪
01:18:50.041 --> 01:18:51.333
- ♪ Work ♪
- ♪ Supermodel ♪
01:18:51.416 --> 01:18:53.958
- ♪ You better work it, girl ♪
- ♪ Of the world ♪
01:18:54.041 --> 01:18:57.416
♪ Wet your lips
And make love to the camera ♪
01:18:57.500 --> 01:18:59.291
- ♪ Work ♪
- ♪ Turn to the left ♪
01:18:59.375 --> 01:19:01.583
- ♪ Work ♪
- ♪ Now turn to the right ♪
01:19:01.666 --> 01:19:02.833
♪ Work ♪
01:19:02.916 --> 01:19:03.833
♪ Sashay ♪
01:19:03.916 --> 01:19:06.291
This is such a perfect night.
01:19:06.375 --> 01:19:07.875
- Yeah.
- That filthy ho.
01:19:07.958 --> 01:19:11.625
- She's rigging the election.
- She's an adult. She won't stoop that low.
01:19:13.333 --> 01:19:14.333
Wait.
01:19:16.041 --> 01:19:17.791
Hey, Tiffany.
01:19:17.875 --> 01:19:19.708
- Oh my gosh.
- Hey, Steph!
01:19:19.791 --> 01:19:21.000
I'm surprised you're here.
01:19:21.083 --> 01:19:24.875
Aren't you normally on a Saturday night
just home sharpening your teeth?
01:19:25.750 --> 01:19:27.583
You know, I just want to say
01:19:27.666 --> 01:19:31.583
the noble thing would be to do
what the rest of these students are doing
01:19:31.666 --> 01:19:33.708
and vote for Bri.
01:19:33.791 --> 01:19:35.083
Oh.
01:19:35.166 --> 01:19:36.625
- Is that right?
- Mm-hmm.
01:19:36.708 --> 01:19:40.208
Well, I always do the noble thing.
01:19:40.916 --> 01:19:43.916
Vote for Bri.
Is it spelled like the cheese?
01:19:45.000 --> 01:19:46.250
B, R, I.
01:19:46.333 --> 01:19:47.333
Hmm.
01:19:48.250 --> 01:19:49.250
Interesting.
01:19:50.708 --> 01:19:51.541
Ooh.
01:19:51.625 --> 01:19:52.875
Yep. Right in there.
01:19:52.958 --> 01:19:53.958
There.
01:19:56.166 --> 01:19:57.875
I'm just so confident.
01:20:01.333 --> 01:20:03.833
- Just vote for me.
- Oh, yeah. Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
01:20:03.916 --> 01:20:05.458
Sethany.
01:20:06.791 --> 01:20:09.208
You know you're not eligible
for prom queen, right?
01:20:09.291 --> 01:20:12.500
That's right, I'm not.
I'm not eligible for prom queen.
01:20:12.583 --> 01:20:15.291
And it's probably killing you
that you aren't either.
01:20:16.416 --> 01:20:17.625
Relax, Tiff.
01:20:18.125 --> 01:20:19.375
I'm just joking.
01:20:21.000 --> 01:20:23.791
- That's funny.
- It's funny. It was a joke. Yeah.
01:20:23.875 --> 01:20:25.750
It was a joke.
01:20:26.375 --> 01:20:27.625
She's going down.
01:20:29.041 --> 01:20:30.791
Bye.
01:20:30.875 --> 01:20:33.416
♪ Make your body rock ♪
01:20:33.500 --> 01:20:34.625
♪ Don't you make it stop ♪
01:20:35.208 --> 01:20:38.333
♪ Baby, dance your dance around me ♪
01:20:38.416 --> 01:20:40.041
♪ I want you all for me... ♪
01:20:40.125 --> 01:20:43.291
- Oh my God, it's beautiful.
- Mm-hmm.
01:20:43.375 --> 01:20:45.166
Oh my God, Steph! There you are!
01:20:45.250 --> 01:20:49.833
- Oh, you guys look incredible. Amazing!
- Thanks. Wanna go crush the photo booth?
01:20:49.916 --> 01:20:52.166
Oh my God, stop.
You're causing climate change.
01:20:52.250 --> 01:20:55.958
Um, I've got to go and get some votes.
I don't know whether you guys saw,
01:20:56.041 --> 01:20:59.125
but Bri's mom is, like, totally trying
to rig the election.
01:20:59.208 --> 01:21:01.166
Oh! Oh, hell, no!
01:21:01.250 --> 01:21:03.333
I will not stand for voter suppression.
01:21:03.416 --> 01:21:06.291
- We're gonna go help spread the word.
- Storm the cafeteria.
01:21:06.375 --> 01:21:07.434
- Bye.
- See you later?
01:21:07.458 --> 01:21:09.291
Everyone feeling included? Okay.
01:21:09.375 --> 01:21:11.833
There's enough room
on the dance floor for everybody,
01:21:11.916 --> 01:21:16.000
and you don't need a partner to dance.
I usually dance by myself. It's fun.
01:21:22.041 --> 01:21:26.750
Baby, look at me. You know, this is
the dress I won prom queen in. Still fits.
01:21:26.833 --> 01:21:28.875
I almost wore that exact same dress,
01:21:28.958 --> 01:21:30.958
but I'm glad I didn't
because you look phenomenal.
01:21:31.041 --> 01:21:32.666
- Aw.
- What are you doing?
01:21:32.750 --> 01:21:36.791
I am fulfilling my duties
as the president of the PTA,
01:21:36.875 --> 01:21:39.041
overlooking the ballot boxes,
01:21:39.125 --> 01:21:43.708
and something tells me
that you got this in the bag.
01:21:43.791 --> 01:21:44.791
Wink.
01:21:45.541 --> 01:21:49.000
I mean, you can't be
a woke prom queen if you lose.
01:21:49.083 --> 01:21:51.541
Which reminds me, here is a list of brands
01:21:51.625 --> 01:21:54.708
I'd love for you to casually drop
during your acceptance speech.
01:21:54.791 --> 01:21:57.416
Each one could be an additional 10K.
01:21:57.500 --> 01:22:01.041
Don't worry if you can't work in Pep Boys.
It's not really our thing.
01:22:01.125 --> 01:22:05.333
Please just try and remember
this is my prom, not yours.
01:22:12.875 --> 01:22:14.500
Hey, fam.
01:22:14.583 --> 01:22:18.958
Um, guys, just letting you know
that prom queen voting is still open,
01:22:19.041 --> 01:22:20.458
and I think that something...
01:22:20.541 --> 01:22:21.875
Damn, Conway, you look...
01:22:21.958 --> 01:22:24.416
...banging.
01:22:25.375 --> 01:22:27.625
Oh my God, you're here. I mean, um...
01:22:29.375 --> 01:22:30.208
You came.
01:22:30.291 --> 01:22:34.666
Of course, I came. I've been waiting
20 years to see you in this dress.
01:22:36.541 --> 01:22:38.166
My God, you look beautiful.
01:22:39.000 --> 01:22:41.708
What is this? You mind if I slip this off?
01:22:41.791 --> 01:22:43.583
- Um...
- You really don't need it.
01:22:44.333 --> 01:22:46.625
I still have a naughty thing
for prom queens, right?
01:22:46.708 --> 01:22:50.416
Well, If I don't get enough votes,
you might be fucking your daughter.
01:22:50.500 --> 01:22:51.583
Huh?
01:22:51.666 --> 01:22:55.375
- No, I wouldn't do that, but...
- No. Obviously. Sorry. Yeah.
01:22:55.458 --> 01:22:56.666
Look at us. We are...
01:22:57.875 --> 01:23:00.666
We're meant to be together.
We're perfect together. Admit it.
01:23:01.375 --> 01:23:02.833
We're made for one another.
01:23:03.375 --> 01:23:04.291
- Blaine?
- Yeah.
01:23:04.375 --> 01:23:06.291
I don't think this is right.
This is a mistake.
01:23:06.375 --> 01:23:08.750
No, no. The mistake was me
asking Tiff to prom. Trust me.
01:23:08.833 --> 01:23:10.666
Wait. No, Blaine. Seriously.
01:23:15.583 --> 01:23:16.583
Seth.
01:23:16.666 --> 01:23:17.666
Seth?
01:23:19.500 --> 01:23:22.416
Hey, Seth. Seth, hey!
I know what that looked like,
01:23:22.500 --> 01:23:24.500
but I promise you,
it's not what you think.
01:23:26.791 --> 01:23:28.541
You teenage-tricked me, Steph.
01:23:29.291 --> 01:23:33.166
And you know what?
It's my fault for believing you changed.
01:23:35.375 --> 01:23:39.875
Okay, class of 2022,
it's the big moment!
01:23:39.958 --> 01:23:44.166
Okay, so the reason that we're all here
and the only reason we all came tonight...
01:23:44.250 --> 01:23:46.166
- No.
- ...is because... No, it is.
01:23:46.250 --> 01:23:51.708
...is because I have the results
of our prom elections.
01:23:55.125 --> 01:23:59.250
By a unanimous vote, our 2022 prom king is
01:24:00.166 --> 01:24:01.583
Lance Harrison.
01:24:08.625 --> 01:24:09.916
Yes!
01:24:11.291 --> 01:24:13.250
Oh my God!
01:24:13.916 --> 01:24:18.083
And the winner of prom queen
received over 1,000 votes
01:24:18.166 --> 01:24:21.583
despite there only being 327 of you.
01:24:21.666 --> 01:24:23.708
However, she has just informed us
01:24:23.791 --> 01:24:26.541
that she has withdrawn
from the competition.
01:24:26.625 --> 01:24:27.625
What?
01:24:29.000 --> 01:24:31.541
- Okay, so...
- Bri.
01:24:31.625 --> 01:24:34.500
...the 2022 prom queen will go to...
01:24:37.458 --> 01:24:38.916
Stephanie Conway.
01:24:48.458 --> 01:24:50.375
There's been a mistake. No, no, no.
01:24:52.083 --> 01:24:54.541
Go, Steph! I can't believe it!
01:24:55.625 --> 01:24:56.458
God!
01:24:56.541 --> 01:25:01.541
Stephanie!
Stephanie! Stephanie! Stephanie!
01:25:01.625 --> 01:25:03.041
Stephanie!
01:25:03.125 --> 01:25:04.416
Stephanie!
01:25:04.500 --> 01:25:05.500
No! No!
01:25:05.583 --> 01:25:08.791
Stephanie!
Stephanie! Stephanie! Stephanie!
01:25:21.416 --> 01:25:25.833
Now it is time for our king and queen
to take their dance.
01:25:32.458 --> 01:25:35.750
- Oh my God!
- ♪ The whispers in the morning ♪
01:25:39.333 --> 01:25:43.041
♪ Of lovers sleeping tight ♪
01:25:46.125 --> 01:25:51.291
♪ Are rolling by like thunder now ♪
01:25:53.208 --> 01:25:57.416
♪ As I look in your eyes ♪
01:26:00.375 --> 01:26:04.416
♪ I hold on to your body ♪
01:26:07.458 --> 01:26:11.791
♪ And feel each move you make ♪
01:26:14.000 --> 01:26:17.791
♪ Your voice is warm and tender ♪
01:26:18.500 --> 01:26:21.416
♪ A love that I could ♪
01:26:22.333 --> 01:26:27.208
♪ Not forsake ♪
01:26:27.875 --> 01:26:32.541
♪ 'Cause I am your lady ♪
01:26:32.625 --> 01:26:34.583
- Oh my God!
- What?
01:26:35.708 --> 01:26:39.125
♪ And you are my man ♪
01:26:40.166 --> 01:26:41.250
Stop.
01:26:41.958 --> 01:26:46.916
♪ Whenever you reach for me ♪
01:26:49.083 --> 01:26:54.666
♪ I'll do all that I can ♪
01:26:56.208 --> 01:27:00.541
♪ Even though there may be times ♪
01:27:03.416 --> 01:27:07.541
♪ It seems I'm far away ♪
01:27:10.208 --> 01:27:13.708
♪ But never wonder where I am ♪
01:27:14.791 --> 01:27:19.875
♪ 'Cause I am always by your... ♪
01:27:19.958 --> 01:27:23.583
After-party at Bri's house
with live music.
01:27:23.666 --> 01:27:28.125
And spoiler alert, party favors
are Beats by Dre headphones!
01:27:28.916 --> 01:27:30.833
Bri, will you tell them?
01:27:30.916 --> 01:27:34.750
Hey, everyone, after-party
is at Steph's place. See you there.
01:27:34.833 --> 01:27:37.791
Wait, what are you doing?
The house is ready for the party.
01:27:37.875 --> 01:27:41.500
I mean, Steve Aoki is in our living room.
What am I going to tell him?
01:27:41.583 --> 01:27:44.250
I don't know.
Tell him you lost prom queen.
01:27:47.333 --> 01:27:48.708
Shit. Shit.
01:27:58.208 --> 01:28:01.250
Drink! Drink!
Drink! Drink! Drink! Drink!
01:28:01.333 --> 01:28:02.541
No!
01:28:06.833 --> 01:28:10.625
Yes, hi. I'd like to report
a rowdy high school party
01:28:10.708 --> 01:28:13.000
with tons of underage drinking.
01:28:13.583 --> 01:28:15.000
And... Oh my God!
01:28:15.750 --> 01:28:18.333
I think an adult is hosting it.
01:28:27.291 --> 01:28:28.291
Yeah!
01:28:28.625 --> 01:28:29.791
Hey!
01:28:29.875 --> 01:28:30.875
Hey, Janet!
01:28:31.333 --> 01:28:32.208
Come on!
01:28:32.291 --> 01:28:34.125
- No, don't film me!
- Why?
01:28:34.208 --> 01:28:36.500
The media will use it
to try and discredit me.
01:28:39.833 --> 01:28:40.666
Wait, no.
01:28:40.750 --> 01:28:43.291
- Fuck it! Fuck it! Film me! Film me!
- Okay. Okay.
01:28:43.375 --> 01:28:47.208
Yeah, come on, yeah.
That's right. It's the president, bitch!
01:28:47.291 --> 01:28:49.208
- Yeah!
- Suck my vulva!
01:28:56.000 --> 01:28:58.166
Oh my God, whose tooth is this?
01:28:58.250 --> 01:28:59.541
Oh shit.
01:28:59.625 --> 01:29:01.125
Cops!
01:29:02.750 --> 01:29:05.625
- Where? Wait. Okay, wait...
- Bye, Stephanie.
01:29:05.708 --> 01:29:07.291
No. Oh my God.
01:29:23.875 --> 01:29:27.041
Oh my God, Martha,
I was just about to call you.
01:29:27.125 --> 01:29:31.166
Steph, what in ever living fuck
were you thinking?
01:29:32.291 --> 01:29:36.083
- You said I could use the house.
- Are you kidding? Twenty years ago.
01:29:36.166 --> 01:29:39.166
And even then,
I didn't want you to use it.
01:29:39.250 --> 01:29:42.050
Did you even think about me?
01:29:42.125 --> 01:29:44.666
This is all kinds of illegal.
01:29:44.750 --> 01:29:47.333
Oh my God, they're gonna make
a Netflix documentary about me.
01:29:47.416 --> 01:29:50.791
Well, wait. Okay, think about that.
That could be really cool.
01:29:50.875 --> 01:29:52.791
That... that could be epic.
01:29:52.875 --> 01:29:54.916
Look how well it turned out
for Tiger King.
01:29:55.000 --> 01:29:56.041
No.
01:29:56.125 --> 01:30:00.166
No, it's not epic or cool.
01:30:00.250 --> 01:30:02.416
God, you're the same as in high school.
01:30:03.000 --> 01:30:05.708
- So you don't want a drink?
- No, I don't want a drink!
01:30:06.625 --> 01:30:08.333
You need to grow up!
01:30:08.916 --> 01:30:10.250
You're not a teenager!
01:30:10.333 --> 01:30:13.833
I know I'm not. I'm an adult.
Is that what you want to hear?
01:30:14.333 --> 01:30:18.000
Yes, I am a 37-year-old 12th grader.
01:30:21.000 --> 01:30:25.541
You don't think I know how crazy it is
going back to high school in this body?
01:30:26.291 --> 01:30:29.083
What else was I supposed to do?
01:30:29.166 --> 01:30:32.375
- What else did I have?
- You had me, and you had Seth.
01:30:32.958 --> 01:30:35.708
Everybody else just got to go on
and live their lives.
01:30:35.791 --> 01:30:37.583
I'm supposed to just jump forward?
01:30:37.666 --> 01:30:40.750
I'm just not allowed
to ever make mistakes?
01:30:40.833 --> 01:30:43.166
Making mistakes is different
01:30:43.250 --> 01:30:46.125
than willfully screwing over
the people who care about you.
01:30:47.208 --> 01:30:48.708
You pushed us away.
01:30:49.625 --> 01:30:52.708
They were not your friends.
We were your friends.
01:30:53.333 --> 01:30:55.250
We were the ones who cared about you.
01:30:55.333 --> 01:30:57.458
We were the ones
who showed up at the hospital.
01:30:57.541 --> 01:30:59.375
They never came to the hospital.
None of them.
01:30:59.458 --> 01:31:01.541
I can't believe you would say that.
01:31:02.333 --> 01:31:04.291
I got tons of birthday cards.
01:31:04.375 --> 01:31:06.291
Did you even look
to see who they were from?
01:31:11.583 --> 01:31:13.750
Help. Oh God.
01:31:14.375 --> 01:31:15.458
Was that curry?
01:31:15.541 --> 01:31:17.708
I'm done. You can find your own way home.
01:31:22.958 --> 01:31:24.166
Hey, Seth.
01:31:32.416 --> 01:31:33.583
Finally.
01:31:33.666 --> 01:31:35.666
I saw you followed Stephanie on Insta.
01:31:35.750 --> 01:31:39.166
Don't you wanna know if I got arrested
at that party you called the cops on?
01:31:39.250 --> 01:31:40.166
I know it was you.
01:31:40.250 --> 01:31:44.000
Do you think I do this stuff for fun?
I'm looking out for you.
01:31:44.083 --> 01:31:46.125
We could have made
a hundred grand tonight.
01:31:46.208 --> 01:31:49.208
We could've used that money
as a donation to get you into college.
01:31:49.291 --> 01:31:51.708
So you could blog
about being an Ivy League mom?
01:31:51.791 --> 01:31:54.083
Oh well, I guess
I'll have to get in myself.
01:31:54.166 --> 01:31:57.500
I want you to have the perfect life,
01:31:58.083 --> 01:31:59.083
like me.
01:31:59.500 --> 01:32:02.708
The perfect life online means nothing
when you're miserable in real life.
01:32:02.791 --> 01:32:05.166
We are not miserable.
01:32:05.250 --> 01:32:06.250
Yeah, we are.
01:32:07.250 --> 01:32:09.583
And you're right, Mom.
01:32:09.666 --> 01:32:12.416
No elite person
follows more than 100 people.
01:32:13.041 --> 01:32:14.666
So you gotta go.
01:32:14.750 --> 01:32:17.333
You are toast.
01:32:17.416 --> 01:32:18.875
Hey, your family's fucked up.
01:32:18.958 --> 01:32:21.333
Are we doing this?
I got another gig in an hour.
01:32:21.416 --> 01:32:23.791
You know what? Fuck you, Steve Aoki.
01:32:23.875 --> 01:32:26.875
♪ Life is a second ♪
01:32:26.958 --> 01:32:29.625
♪ Gone in an instant ♪
01:32:29.708 --> 01:32:32.416
♪ Defined by a moment... ♪
01:32:32.500 --> 01:32:34.875
No offense,
but you look like a prom queen.
01:32:38.208 --> 01:32:40.791
Holy shit, Deanna Russo?
01:32:41.833 --> 01:32:44.041
Yeah. Do we know each other?
01:32:44.541 --> 01:32:47.708
Oh my God. No. I... I mean...
Well, I know who you are.
01:32:47.791 --> 01:32:49.541
You're a legend at Harding High.
01:32:49.625 --> 01:32:51.750
You won prom queen and had a perfect life.
01:32:51.833 --> 01:32:53.500
Perfect life?
01:32:54.250 --> 01:32:57.208
Yeah. Uh, let's see, um...
01:32:57.291 --> 01:33:01.500
I was divorced before I was 30
when my husband left me
01:33:01.583 --> 01:33:05.666
for a 21-year-old barista
with two more abs than I had.
01:33:05.750 --> 01:33:10.541
And I was left with no credit
and no job prospects.
01:33:11.416 --> 01:33:14.500
My advice, throw that crown away now.
01:33:15.083 --> 01:33:16.666
You know what prom queen got me?
01:33:16.750 --> 01:33:18.416
An even spray tan
01:33:18.500 --> 01:33:22.375
and the ability to dodge bleach poisoning
every time I get my hair done.
01:33:22.458 --> 01:33:24.250
Well, I mean, that is a skill.
01:33:25.541 --> 01:33:26.541
Yeah.
01:33:27.083 --> 01:33:33.666
But, uh, imagine all the other skills
I would have had if I'd gone to college.
01:33:33.750 --> 01:33:35.500
I don't know where I would be,
01:33:36.041 --> 01:33:39.208
but I do know it wouldn't be
taking courses at the community college
01:33:39.291 --> 01:33:42.375
while hustling
to make rent between two jobs.
01:33:42.458 --> 01:33:46.458
The only thing I look forward to
is taking my pants off at night.
01:33:46.541 --> 01:33:48.250
Oh my God. I do that too now.
01:33:48.333 --> 01:33:50.708
- It's so good, right?
- Yeah. Just like...
01:33:50.791 --> 01:33:53.375
Yeah.
01:33:53.458 --> 01:33:57.583
But it's all worth it
'cause I am going to get a degree,
01:33:57.666 --> 01:34:02.166
and I am going to have a career,
and that is everything.
01:34:02.750 --> 01:34:06.708
And for the first time in my life,
I'm excited about the future
01:34:07.291 --> 01:34:09.416
instead of holding on to the past.
01:34:14.083 --> 01:34:18.791
♪ I should know who I am by now ♪
01:34:19.833 --> 01:34:22.125
♪ I walk ♪
01:34:22.208 --> 01:34:25.250
♪ The record stands somehow ♪
01:34:25.333 --> 01:34:27.416
♪ Thinking of winter ♪
01:34:30.666 --> 01:34:34.250
♪ Your name is the splinter inside me ♪
01:34:35.125 --> 01:34:38.666
♪ While I wait... ♪
01:34:38.750 --> 01:34:42.666
Please welcome
our award-winning Harding Bulldogettes!
01:34:42.750 --> 01:34:47.708
♪ And I remember the sound ♪
01:34:48.458 --> 01:34:51.208
♪ Of your November downtown ♪
01:34:53.666 --> 01:34:57.500
♪ And I remember the truth ♪
01:34:59.416 --> 01:35:01.875
♪ A warm December with you ♪
01:35:03.250 --> 01:35:07.708
♪ But I don't have to make this mistake ♪
01:35:09.125 --> 01:35:13.541
♪ And I don't have to stay this way ♪
01:35:14.416 --> 01:35:16.916
♪ If only I would wake ♪
01:35:22.750 --> 01:35:24.500
Oh. There you are.
01:35:25.750 --> 01:35:27.000
Is everything okay?
01:35:28.250 --> 01:35:29.250
Want something to eat?
01:35:30.291 --> 01:35:31.291
I'm not hungry.
01:35:31.375 --> 01:35:34.125
Oh, come on. Sit down with me.
Have breakfast with your old dad.
01:35:39.708 --> 01:35:42.625
Do you know
where you're sitting at graduation yet?
01:35:43.833 --> 01:35:44.708
On my butt?
01:35:47.416 --> 01:35:49.458
I just wanna get a good seat
so I can see you.
01:35:51.875 --> 01:35:53.708
I'm not gonna go to graduation, Dad.
01:35:53.791 --> 01:35:55.458
Seth and Martha won't talk to me,
01:35:55.541 --> 01:35:57.791
and I don't think
anybody else wants me there.
01:35:57.875 --> 01:35:59.208
Well, I want you there.
01:35:59.791 --> 01:36:00.833
That doesn't count.
01:36:01.416 --> 01:36:02.416
Yes, it does.
01:36:03.958 --> 01:36:05.083
I count.
01:36:06.041 --> 01:36:10.083
I know you used to roll your eyes
whenever Mom would compliment you,
01:36:11.000 --> 01:36:14.041
tell you how amazing,
beautiful, wonderful you were,
01:36:14.625 --> 01:36:16.750
like she had to say it 'cause she was Mom,
01:36:18.291 --> 01:36:19.750
but she wanted to
01:36:20.416 --> 01:36:22.666
because she believed it, deeply.
01:36:25.083 --> 01:36:28.041
One of the last things
she said to me was to make sure
01:36:28.833 --> 01:36:31.291
that you knew how to receive love.
01:36:32.083 --> 01:36:35.916
And I spent every day of your coma
wondering if I messed up,
01:36:36.000 --> 01:36:39.250
so... let me be clear.
01:36:41.208 --> 01:36:45.166
Don't waste your time
telling the people who love you the most
01:36:45.250 --> 01:36:46.666
that they don't count.
01:36:47.625 --> 01:36:50.125
They are the only ones that count.
01:36:53.208 --> 01:36:54.250
Thanks, Dad.
01:36:55.583 --> 01:36:56.583
Yeah.
01:37:01.833 --> 01:37:05.250
Okay, I know I have
some things to clear up, so...
01:37:07.041 --> 01:37:09.125
I thought this is gonna be the best way.
01:37:09.208 --> 01:37:12.958
Guys, I fucked up.
And I really need to apologize.
01:37:13.041 --> 01:37:15.916
First of all, I've been
a really dodgy friend
01:37:16.000 --> 01:37:18.583
to the two people
who care about me the most,
01:37:18.666 --> 01:37:23.291
the people who supported me when I was
just that dorky kid fresh from Australia,
01:37:24.041 --> 01:37:28.500
the ones who stayed by my side,
even when I majorly neglected them,
01:37:29.416 --> 01:37:32.666
the ones who,
for some reason, never gave up on me.
01:37:32.750 --> 01:37:36.500
It doesn't matter who has
the most friends or likes or followers.
01:37:36.583 --> 01:37:38.958
If you just have one or two great friends
01:37:39.041 --> 01:37:41.875
who will support you
even when you're being a butt slut,
01:37:41.958 --> 01:37:43.375
then you've got it all.
01:37:44.166 --> 01:37:46.333
And that is something worth fighting for,
01:37:46.416 --> 01:37:48.416
so fuck what other people think.
01:37:48.500 --> 01:37:51.958
Yeah, like, fuck being popular.
Fuck being cool.
01:37:52.041 --> 01:37:53.625
Fuck it in the ass.
01:37:53.708 --> 01:37:55.333
Stephie, language.
01:37:55.958 --> 01:37:59.708
I never planned on taking
two decades to graduate, obvi,
01:37:59.791 --> 01:38:02.666
but the class of 2022
showed me something that
01:38:02.750 --> 01:38:05.392
I could never have learned
when I was in high school the first time.
01:38:05.416 --> 01:38:06.833
We have a school archive!
01:38:07.500 --> 01:38:12.666
And that is every single one of us
is so unique, and that's awesome.
01:38:12.750 --> 01:38:15.041
Why fit in when you can stand out?
01:38:15.916 --> 01:38:19.416
And so, okay, now I'm gonna do something
01:38:19.500 --> 01:38:22.458
that I wish I had
the confidence to do 20 years ago,
01:38:23.083 --> 01:38:25.083
and that is being my real self.
01:38:25.750 --> 01:38:28.958
And yeah, I'm still afraid that
if I show everyone my real self,
01:38:29.041 --> 01:38:30.916
the wrong people will make fun of me.
01:38:31.416 --> 01:38:34.041
But it's the only way
for the right people to see me.
01:38:36.000 --> 01:38:38.125
And they're the ones
I care about the most.
01:38:40.875 --> 01:38:44.458
They're the ones I want,
more than anything, to forgive me.
01:38:56.833 --> 01:38:59.541
Dad, stop. Stop it.
01:38:59.625 --> 01:39:00.916
That's it.
01:39:01.833 --> 01:39:03.416
Dad, just stop it! Press stop.
01:39:03.500 --> 01:39:05.250
Sorry.
01:39:05.333 --> 01:39:06.875
That was beautiful.
01:39:09.625 --> 01:39:10.458
Tiff.
01:39:10.541 --> 01:39:15.500
My daughter
won't, um, unblock me unless...
01:39:16.958 --> 01:39:18.250
I came to apologize to you.
01:39:19.333 --> 01:39:21.041
- Seriously?
- So...
01:39:21.125 --> 01:39:22.125
Um...
01:39:23.083 --> 01:39:26.208
I am sorry for everything I've done
01:39:27.083 --> 01:39:31.208
and for treating you
like human garbage all these years.
01:39:31.291 --> 01:39:34.166
Tiff, I'm not the one you should be trying
to make things right with.
01:39:34.875 --> 01:39:37.125
You and Blaine have an awesome daughter
01:39:37.208 --> 01:39:41.458
who's so smart and way cooler
than what you and I ever were.
01:39:43.291 --> 01:39:44.958
Stop competing with her.
01:39:45.541 --> 01:39:47.458
There's enough room for both of you.
01:39:48.083 --> 01:39:50.000
There's enough room for all of us.
01:39:50.500 --> 01:39:52.458
We don't need to fight with each other.
01:39:53.791 --> 01:39:54.791
You're right.
01:39:55.458 --> 01:39:59.000
I am really sorry, Stephanie,
01:39:59.750 --> 01:40:00.750
for...
01:40:02.708 --> 01:40:03.708
everything.
01:40:06.416 --> 01:40:07.416
Yeah.
01:40:09.000 --> 01:40:10.541
Apology accepted.
01:40:13.500 --> 01:40:14.958
- Okay.
- Tiff, wait, um...
01:40:15.750 --> 01:40:18.375
I never let a guest leave
without a gift.
01:40:19.750 --> 01:40:21.166
- Hang on.
- That is...
01:40:21.250 --> 01:40:24.083
- Just wait... wait one second.
- ...so cute.
01:40:27.458 --> 01:40:28.500
That's for you.
01:40:32.375 --> 01:40:34.851
- Thank you so much. Thank you.
- Thanks for coming over.
01:40:34.875 --> 01:40:36.416
Lance Harrison.
01:40:39.250 --> 01:40:40.916
Oh my God.
01:40:46.583 --> 01:40:49.791
- I just wanna say thanks to my grandma...
- No, no, no, no.
01:40:49.875 --> 01:40:52.833
Just so everybody knows,
nobody else do that. Okay.
01:40:53.333 --> 01:40:55.500
Britney Jean Balbo.
01:40:59.375 --> 01:41:01.208
- Yes, Bri!
- Go, baby!
01:41:01.291 --> 01:41:02.333
Go, Bri!
01:41:09.166 --> 01:41:11.500
Stephanie Marie Conway.
01:41:13.416 --> 01:41:15.583
That's my daughter!
01:41:23.625 --> 01:41:24.875
Um, oh...
01:41:25.666 --> 01:41:28.666
Here. To pay
for all the damage at the lake house.
01:41:28.750 --> 01:41:30.125
Where did you get this from?
01:41:30.208 --> 01:41:32.625
I sold the Cabriolet.
Time to grow up.
01:41:33.208 --> 01:41:35.458
Aw.
01:41:35.541 --> 01:41:36.958
I am so proud of you.
01:41:37.041 --> 01:41:38.166
Aw, thanks, Marth.
01:41:39.000 --> 01:41:40.541
I'm so lucky to have you as a friend.
01:41:48.375 --> 01:41:49.375
Congrats, Steph.
01:41:50.000 --> 01:41:50.833
Thanks.
01:41:50.916 --> 01:41:53.333
Now, to end our ceremony,
I'd like to invite
01:41:53.416 --> 01:41:57.666
our 2022 class valedictorian, Janet Singh.
01:42:00.166 --> 01:42:01.833
- After you.
- Thank you!
01:42:05.083 --> 01:42:06.250
Go, Janet!
01:42:08.583 --> 01:42:10.208
Okay, listen up.
01:42:10.291 --> 01:42:14.375
It is hot as hell,
and this ceremony is way too long.
01:42:14.458 --> 01:42:16.666
So I'm just gonna say one thing.
01:42:16.750 --> 01:42:19.791
Who you are in high school
doesn't define you.
01:42:20.666 --> 01:42:23.166
And I would also like
to officially announce
01:42:23.250 --> 01:42:25.583
my campaign for US president.
01:42:25.666 --> 01:42:27.583
Vote for me in 2040.
01:42:28.125 --> 01:42:29.125
Yay!
01:42:32.166 --> 01:42:35.916
And lastly,
I have one question for all of you.
01:42:37.000 --> 01:42:38.958
- Are you ready...
- ♪ Are you ready ♪
01:42:39.041 --> 01:42:40.801
- ♪ For the Harding ♪
- ...for the Harding...
01:42:41.916 --> 01:42:44.000
- ♪ Bulldogettes ♪
- ...Bulldogettes?
01:42:46.625 --> 01:42:50.791
♪ Oh, good gracious ass is bodacious
Flirtatious, trying to show patience ♪
01:42:50.875 --> 01:42:53.892
- ♪ And can't nobody stop the juice... ♪
- No way. Stephanie's Dance Grooves?
01:42:53.916 --> 01:42:56.375
- ♪ I said, it's gettin' hot in here ♪
- ♪ So hot ♪
01:42:56.458 --> 01:42:58.000
♪ So take off all your clothes ♪
01:42:58.083 --> 01:43:01.791
♪ I am gettin' so hot
I wanna take my clothes off ♪
01:43:01.875 --> 01:43:04.000
- ♪ It's gettin' hot in here ♪
- ♪ So hot ♪
01:43:04.083 --> 01:43:05.750
♪ So take off all your clothes ♪
01:43:05.833 --> 01:43:09.250
♪ I am gettin' so hot
I wanna take my clothes off ♪
01:43:13.791 --> 01:43:16.791
♪ Come on over, come on over, baby ♪
01:43:17.750 --> 01:43:20.833
♪ Come on over, come on, come on ♪
01:43:20.916 --> 01:43:22.458
♪ Baby, baby, baby ♪
01:43:24.666 --> 01:43:25.958
- Ready?
- Okay!
01:43:26.041 --> 01:43:29.750
♪ We are the Bulldogs
We like it rough, rough, rough ♪
01:43:29.833 --> 01:43:33.041
♪ No one can beat us
No, we're too tough ♪
01:43:33.125 --> 01:43:34.325
- Strong arms!
- ♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
01:43:34.375 --> 01:43:38.083
♪ We fight to the finish
We're in it to win it ♪
01:43:38.166 --> 01:43:41.583
- ♪ Ah, yeah ♪
- ♪ Moment, moment, moment ♪
01:43:43.541 --> 01:43:46.083
- ♪ Some people wait a lifetime ♪
- Okay, I have to go.
01:43:46.958 --> 01:43:50.583
- Kelly Clarkson!
- ♪ For a moment like this ♪
01:43:50.666 --> 01:43:54.833
♪ Some people search forever ♪
01:43:54.916 --> 01:43:57.958
♪ For that one special kiss ♪
01:43:58.041 --> 01:44:04.333
♪ Oh, I can't believe
It's happening to me ♪
01:44:04.416 --> 01:44:08.125
♪ Some people wait a lifetime ♪
01:44:08.208 --> 01:44:12.500
♪ For a moment, moment, moment ♪
01:44:25.208 --> 01:44:28.958
♪ We are the Bulldogs
We like it rough, rough, rough ♪
01:44:29.041 --> 01:44:31.708
♪ No one can beat us
No, we're too tough ♪
01:44:32.833 --> 01:44:35.750
♪ We are the Bulldogs
We are hot stuff ♪
01:44:36.500 --> 01:44:39.541
♪ No one can beat us
'Cause we're enough ♪
01:44:40.416 --> 01:44:42.625
♪ Yeah, yeah, we fight to the finish ♪
01:44:42.708 --> 01:44:44.416
♪ We're in it to win it ♪
01:44:44.916 --> 01:44:48.583
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
01:44:48.666 --> 01:44:52.208
♪ Some people wait a lifetime ♪
01:44:52.291 --> 01:44:56.375
- ♪ For a moment, moment, moment ♪
- ♪ Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go ♪
01:44:56.458 --> 01:44:59.166
♪ Like this ♪
01:45:01.750 --> 01:45:04.583
Oh my God! Oh my God!
01:45:08.125 --> 01:45:11.250
Well, then, we should go out?
01:45:12.000 --> 01:45:14.041
No duh.
01:45:25.958 --> 01:45:28.041
♪ Some people say I look like me dad ♪
01:45:29.250 --> 01:45:30.916
♪ Oh-oh ♪
01:45:32.125 --> 01:45:33.708
♪ Hey, hey ♪
01:45:33.791 --> 01:45:35.125
♪ Oh-oh ♪
01:45:38.083 --> 01:45:39.541
♪ Oh-oh ♪
01:45:42.125 --> 01:45:45.000
♪ I said, hey, boy
Sittin' in your tree" ♪
01:45:45.083 --> 01:45:47.250
♪ Mummy always wants you to come for tea ♪
01:45:47.333 --> 01:45:49.416
♪ Don't be shy, straighten up your tie ♪
01:45:49.500 --> 01:45:51.958
♪ Get down from your tree house
Sittin' in the sky ♪
01:45:52.041 --> 01:45:53.833
♪ I wanna know just what to do ♪
01:45:53.916 --> 01:45:56.250
♪ Is it very big?
Is there room for two? ♪
01:45:56.333 --> 01:45:58.208
♪ I got a house with windows and doors ♪
01:45:58.291 --> 01:46:01.166
♪ I'll show you mine
If you show me yours ♪
01:46:01.250 --> 01:46:03.291
♪ Gotta let me in ♪
01:46:03.375 --> 01:46:05.041
♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪
01:46:05.125 --> 01:46:07.875
♪ Let the fun begin ♪
01:46:08.458 --> 01:46:10.000
♪ Hey ♪
01:46:10.083 --> 01:46:11.916
♪ I'm the wolf today ♪
01:46:12.000 --> 01:46:13.583
♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪
01:46:13.666 --> 01:46:18.083
♪ I'll huff, I'll puff
I'll huff, I'll puff, I'll blow you away ♪
01:46:18.166 --> 01:46:19.750
♪ Say you will, say you won't ♪
01:46:19.833 --> 01:46:21.625
♪ Say you'll do what I don't ♪
01:46:21.708 --> 01:46:23.833
♪ Say you're true, say to me ♪
01:46:24.958 --> 01:46:26.416
♪ C'est la vie ♪
01:46:26.500 --> 01:46:28.208
♪ Say you will, say you won't ♪
01:46:28.291 --> 01:46:30.416
♪ Say you'll do what I don't ♪
01:46:30.500 --> 01:46:33.708
- ♪ Say you're true, say to me ♪
- ♪ Get a life... ♪
01:46:33.791 --> 01:46:36.000
Who doesn't want a Hummer
on their big night?
01:46:36.083 --> 01:46:37.541
Not me.
01:46:37.625 --> 01:46:40.083
♪ Do you ever get lonely
Playing with your toys? ♪
01:46:40.166 --> 01:46:41.875
♪ We can talk, we can sing ♪
01:46:41.958 --> 01:46:44.875
- ♪ I'll be the queen... ♪
- I love belly button play.
01:46:44.958 --> 01:46:47.875
I really wanna get spit-roasted
by two leather daddies.
01:46:47.958 --> 01:46:50.875
Never before. I'm sex... sex nothing.
01:46:50.958 --> 01:46:53.875
- Stop.
- Okay, all righty.
01:46:53.958 --> 01:46:55.791
♪ Gotta let me in ♪
01:46:55.875 --> 01:46:57.958
♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪
01:46:58.041 --> 01:47:00.458
♪ Let the fun begin ♪
01:47:00.541 --> 01:47:01.750
- A-mark.
- ♪ Hey ♪
01:47:01.833 --> 01:47:02.833
B-mark.
01:47:02.875 --> 01:47:04.541
♪ I'm the wolf today ♪
01:47:04.625 --> 01:47:06.416
♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪
01:47:06.500 --> 01:47:07.916
♪ I'll huff, I'll puff... ♪
01:47:08.000 --> 01:47:09.875
I'm making a love heart sign.
01:47:09.958 --> 01:47:11.375
♪ I'll blow you away... ♪
01:47:11.458 --> 01:47:13.750
What am I doing?
I'm just making a love heart.
01:47:13.833 --> 01:47:15.625
Welcome to Book Corner
with Sam Richardson.
01:47:15.708 --> 01:47:16.958
♪ Say to me ♪
01:47:17.041 --> 01:47:18.291
- ♪ Yeah... ♪
- Oh.
01:47:18.375 --> 01:47:19.666
Oppa Gangnam Style.
01:47:19.750 --> 01:47:21.500
- Oppa. Oppa.
- Oppa Gangnam Style.
01:47:22.375 --> 01:47:23.375
Yeah, very fast.
01:47:23.416 --> 01:47:26.166
- ♪ Say you're true, say to me ♪
- ♪ What do you know? ♪
01:47:26.750 --> 01:47:28.791
♪ C'est la vie ♪
01:47:37.958 --> 01:47:38.833
♪ Hey, hey ♪
01:47:38.916 --> 01:47:40.375
♪ Na-na-na-eh ♪
01:47:41.208 --> 01:47:42.583
♪ Na-na-na-oh ♪
01:47:43.250 --> 01:47:44.750
♪ Na-na-na-eh ♪
01:47:45.333 --> 01:47:47.708
♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪
01:47:47.791 --> 01:47:49.708
♪ Say you will, say you won't ♪
01:47:49.791 --> 01:47:51.916
♪ Say you'll do what I don't ♪
01:47:52.000 --> 01:47:54.083
♪ Say you're true, say to me ♪
01:47:54.166 --> 01:47:56.500
♪ Wanna say c'est la vie ♪
01:47:56.583 --> 01:47:58.416
♪ Say you will, say you won't ♪
01:47:58.500 --> 01:48:00.708
♪ Say you'll do what I don't ♪
01:48:00.791 --> 01:48:02.666
♪ Say you're true, say to me ♪
01:48:02.750 --> 01:48:04.125
♪ Fight like me dad as well ♪
01:48:04.208 --> 01:48:06.125
♪ C'est la vie ♪
01:48:07.583 --> 01:48:10.000
- ♪ Na-na-na-oh ♪
- ♪ C'est la vie ♪
01:48:10.083 --> 01:48:11.416
♪ Na-na-na-eh ♪
01:48:11.916 --> 01:48:14.166
- ♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪
- ♪ C'est la vie ♪
01:48:16.791 --> 01:48:21.208
I really do want to go to college.
So what do I need to do?
01:48:21.291 --> 01:48:24.708
I... I would do anything.
I mean, not...
01:48:24.791 --> 01:48:25.708
Oh.
01:48:25.791 --> 01:48:29.708
Sorry, I just... Yeah, I... I meant... anything.
01:48:31.125 --> 01:48:33.541
No, I didn't... Sorry.
I didn't mean that. I meant...
01:48:33.625 --> 01:48:36.666
Oh my God. I meant I will do anything...
01:48:38.500 --> 01:48:40.291
- Oh my God.
- ...non-sexually.
01:48:40.375 --> 01:48:44.875
Oh, good, good. Don't ever resort to that
unless you have to.
01:48:44.958 --> 01:48:47.666
And if that's what you wanna do
with your life, then do it,
01:48:47.750 --> 01:48:50.625
but don't do it with me.
I'm terrible in bed.
01:48:57.083 --> 01:49:00.958
♪ If this is all I need
And all I believe in ♪
01:49:01.041 --> 01:49:04.875
♪ Will you keep singing
Keep on moving forever? ♪
01:49:04.958 --> 01:49:08.791
♪ I've got this feeling
And I'm better than free ♪
01:49:08.875 --> 01:49:11.375
♪ I'll keep on singing, keep on moving ♪
01:49:11.458 --> 01:49:12.708
♪ Remember ♪
01:49:12.791 --> 01:49:14.666
♪ Yeah, I'm waking up and go-go ♪
01:49:14.750 --> 01:49:16.500
♪ Yeah, got me going loco ♪
01:49:16.583 --> 01:49:18.083
♪ This is all I want ♪
01:49:18.166 --> 01:49:20.083
♪ The beat is so strong ♪
01:49:20.166 --> 01:49:22.541
♪ Yeah, I'm waking up and go-go ♪
01:49:22.625 --> 01:49:24.541
♪ Yeah, got me going loco ♪
01:49:24.625 --> 01:49:26.000
♪ This is all I want ♪
01:49:26.083 --> 01:49:28.333
♪ The beat is so strong ♪
01:49:29.458 --> 01:49:31.208
♪ Uh, ah-ah ♪
01:49:31.291 --> 01:49:33.125
♪ Uh, ah-ah ♪
01:49:33.208 --> 01:49:35.083
♪ Uh, ah-ah ♪
01:49:35.166 --> 01:49:37.666
♪ Got me dancing all night long ♪
01:49:37.750 --> 01:49:41.250
♪ I'm waking up and go
No, never taking it slow ♪
01:49:41.333 --> 01:49:45.166
♪ Will you keep talking
Keep on grooving forever? ♪
01:49:45.250 --> 01:49:49.083
♪ I've got this feeling
And I'm higher than free ♪
01:49:49.166 --> 01:49:51.375
♪ I'll keep on living
Keep on moving ♪
01:49:51.458 --> 01:49:52.958
♪ Remember ♪
01:49:53.041 --> 01:49:55.041
♪ Yeah, I'm waking up and go-go ♪
01:49:55.125 --> 01:49:57.041
♪ Yeah, got me going loco ♪
01:49:57.125 --> 01:49:58.375
♪ This is all I want ♪
01:49:58.458 --> 01:50:00.250
♪ The beat is so strong ♪
01:50:01.000 --> 01:50:02.708
♪ Uh, ah-ah ♪
01:50:02.791 --> 01:50:04.458
♪ Uh, ah-ah ♪
01:50:04.541 --> 01:50:06.583
♪ Uh, ah-ah ♪
01:50:06.666 --> 01:50:08.833
♪ Got me dancing all night long ♪
01:50:08.916 --> 01:50:10.083
♪ This is all I want ♪
01:50:10.166 --> 01:50:12.208
♪ The beat is so strong ♪
01:50:12.291 --> 01:50:13.958
♪ The beat is so strong ♪
01:50:14.041 --> 01:50:17.000
♪ Got me dancing all night long ♪
01:50:19.125 --> 01:50:20.250
♪ Let me talk it out ♪
01:50:21.625 --> 01:50:22.625
♪ Yeah ♪
01:50:23.291 --> 01:50:24.625
♪ Listen up right here ♪
01:50:26.208 --> 01:50:30.166
♪ Lately, I've been picking
Picking up on you ♪
01:50:30.250 --> 01:50:34.458
♪ Oh, every time you come around
There's something new ♪
01:50:34.541 --> 01:50:38.666
♪ So let me in your mind
Yeah, let me read the room ♪
01:50:38.750 --> 01:50:43.291
♪ Yeah, we can work it out
If we just let it loose ♪
01:50:44.708 --> 01:50:45.708
♪ You know ♪
01:50:46.625 --> 01:50:48.125
♪ All I've got to say is ♪
01:50:50.208 --> 01:50:51.958
♪ I'm running outta patience ♪
01:50:52.041 --> 01:50:53.208
♪ He-hey ♪
01:50:54.583 --> 01:50:56.250
♪ No more playing ♪
01:50:56.750 --> 01:50:58.375
♪ You hear what I'm saying? ♪
01:50:58.458 --> 01:51:00.541
♪ I'm running outta
I'm running outta ♪
01:51:00.625 --> 01:51:02.041
♪ Oh-oh ♪
01:51:02.708 --> 01:51:04.791
♪ No misbehaving ♪
01:51:04.875 --> 01:51:06.958
♪ 'Cause I'm running outta patience ♪
01:51:07.041 --> 01:51:09.583
♪ I'm running outta
I'm running outta ♪
01:51:15.541 --> 01:51:18.000
♪ I'm running outta
I'm running outta ♪
01:51:19.000 --> 01:51:20.000
♪ You know ♪
01:51:20.875 --> 01:51:22.500
♪ All I've got to say is ♪
01:51:24.500 --> 01:51:26.208
♪ I'm running outta patience ♪
01:51:28.416 --> 01:51:30.750
♪ I'm running outta
I'm running outta ♪
01:51:37.166 --> 01:51:39.333
♪ I'm running outta
I'm running outta ♪
01:51:39.357 --> 01:51:50.357
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