WEBVTT

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..:: Presented By ZarFilm Website ::..
‏.::  www.bolboljan.net ::.

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Craig, honey,
it's time for bed.

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Craig, honey, time to get up.

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Craig, honey, time to get up.
Craig, honey, time to get up.

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- Craig, honey, time to get up.
- Lotte.

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I'm sorry. I didn't know
Orrin Hatch was out of his cage.

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Come on. Morning, sweetheart.

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Morning.

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What are you gonna do today?

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Working in the workshop.

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I was thinking.

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Maybe you'd feel better
if you got a job.

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We've been over this.

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Nobody's looking for a puppeteer in
today's wintry economic climate.

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I know, honey,
but I thought, you know,

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maybe something else until this
puppet thing turns around.

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Derek Mantini
doesn't need a day job.

00:03:16.213 --> 00:03:19.883
Not everybody can be
Derek Mantini.

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I gotta get to the shop.
We have a shipment of kitty litter coming in.

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Will you do me a favor?
Will you take a look at Elijah today?

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He's not feeling
very good again.

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Which one is Elijah again?

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- The chimp, honey.
- Yeah, okay.

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On the lighter
side of the news,

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in Westchester County today
puppeteer Derek Mantini

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thrilled onlookers as he
performed The Belle of Amherst

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with a 60-foot
Emily Dickinson puppet.

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How dreary to be somebody!

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How public, like a frog

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To tell one's
name the livelong day

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Gimmicky bastard.

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You don't know lucky you are,
being a monkey.

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Because consciousness...

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is a terrible curse.

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I think, I feel, I suffer.

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And all I ask in return is the
opportunity to do my work.

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And they won't allow it...

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Because I raise issues.

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While we enjoy the
pleasures of an uneasy love

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and abandon ourselves
to fornication,

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we were spared God's severity.

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Say no more, I beg you,

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and cease
from complaints like these

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which are so far removed
from the true depths of love.

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Look, a puppet show!

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Okay, honey, just for a minute.
Mommy's waiting.

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Even during
the celebration of Mass,

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when our prayers
should be pure,

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lewd visions of these pleasures

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take such a hold
upon my unhappy soul

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that my thoughts are on their very
wantonness instead of my prayers.

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Sometimes my thoughts are betrayed
by the movement of my body.

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I took my fill of my
wretched pleasures in you

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and this was
the sum total of my love.

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You motherfucker!

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Oh, Craig!

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Honey, not again!

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Why do you do this
to yourself, honey?

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I'm a puppeteer.

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Seven and a half, right?

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Uh, yeah.

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I'll take you through it.

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Seven and a half.

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Thank you.

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Welcome to Lestercorp.
How may we meet your filing needs?

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No. Um...
My name's Craig Schwartz.

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I have an interview
with Dr. Lester.

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Oh. Please have a seat,
Mr. Juarez.

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Schwartz.

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- Pardon?
- Schwartz.

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I...I'm sorry. I have no idea what
you're saying to me right now.

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My name is Schwartz.

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My name is Warts?

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Mr. Juarez?

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- Oh. Yes?
- Chest?

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I said, "Yes?"

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You suggest what?

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I'm sorry, I have no time for piddling
suggestions from mumbling job applicants.

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Besides,
Dr. Lester will see you now.

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Come in, Mr. Juarez.

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Actually, my name
is Craig Schwartz, Dr. Lester.

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- Security!
- No, sir, it's...

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It's just a little mix-up with your secretary.
My name is Craig Schwartz.

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I tried to explain that to her.

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She's not my secretary.

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- She's what they call an executive liaison.
- Ah.

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And I am not banging her, if
that's what you're implying.

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No, sir, not at all.
I think I must have simply misspoke.

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Ah. Well, now,

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tell me, Dr. Schwartz, what do you
feel you can bring to Lestercorp?

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Uh, well, sir,
I'm an excellent filer.

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Are you? All right.
Let's see about that.

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Tell me, which of these two letters comes first?
This one or this one?

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The symbol on the left
is not a letter, sir.

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Damn, you're good.

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- I was trying to trick you.
- I see.

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Well, then, put these in order.

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Yes, sir.

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Floris,
get Guinness on the phone.

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- Yes, sir.
- Genghis Khan Capone. Fine.

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Damn fine woman, Floris.

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I don't know how she puts up with
this speech impediment of mine.

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You don't have a speech
impediment, Dr. Lester.

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Flattery will get you
everywhere, my boy.

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I'm afraid I have to trust
Floris on that one.

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You see,
she's got her doctorate

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in speech impedimentology
from Case Western.

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I apologize if you can't
understand a word I'm saying.

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No, I understand perfectly.

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Oh, it's very kind of you
to lie.

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You see, I've been very lonely

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in my isolated tower
of indecipherable speech.

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You got the job.

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Any questions?

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Well, just one.

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Why are these ceilings so low?

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Low overhead, my boy!

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We pass the savings on to you.

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But seriously, that'll all
be covered in orientation.

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Welcome to the seven and a half
floor of the Mertin Flemmer Building.

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As you'll now be spending
your work day here,

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it is important that you learn a bit
about the history of this famous floor.

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Hello, Don. Hello, Wendy.

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Don, I was wondering,

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do you know why our workplace
has such low ceilings?

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It's an interesting story.

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Many years ago
in the late 1800s,

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James Mertin,
an Irish ship captain,

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came to this town and decided
to erect an office building.

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He called this building the Mertin
Flemmer Building after himself

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and someone else, who local
legend has it was named Flemmer.

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Well, one day, old Captain Mertin
received an unexpected visitor.

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Captain Mertin?

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Aye. What want ye, girl child?

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I'm not a child, but rather an adult
lady of miniature proportions.

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I see. Well, if it's
charity you're after,

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be gone with ye,
you foul demon!

00:13:35.415 --> 00:13:37.333
I'm not asking for alms

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but, rather, the ear of a
kind man with a noble heart.

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Well, speak then, if you must.

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Captain Mertin, I'm afraid that

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the world was not built
with me in mind.

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Doorknobs are too high,
chairs are unwieldy

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and high-ceilinged rooms
mock my stature.

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Why cannot there be a place for me
to work that's safe and comfortable?

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Thy story has moved me
like no other.

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Therefore, I shall make ye...

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me wife.

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And... And I shall build
a floor for ye

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between the seventh and the
eighth in me own building

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so at least there'll be
one place on God's green earth

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where ye and your accursed
kind can live in peace.

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So that's the story
of seven and a half.

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Since the rents
are considerably lower,

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this floor has been adopted
by businesses which,

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for one reason or another, have
been forced to cut corners.

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After all, the overhead is low.

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Moving story, huh?

00:14:47.237 --> 00:14:49.738
Unfortunately,
the story's bullshit.

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Listen, I'm Craig Schwartz.
I'm just starting out at Lestercorp.

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Where are you starting out?

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Shut up! Shut up!

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Shut up! Shut up!

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Hey, shut up!

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- Shut up! I'm sorry.
- I'm sorry, honey.

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Sorry, honey. Sorry, honey.

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- Shut up!
- Sorry!

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Help!
She's locking me in a cage.

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Isn't that cute?
I just taught him that today.

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Yeah, that's adorable.

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- You want to do some dishes for me?
- Put that down.

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Here, Elijah. Here you go.

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You know, I have an appointment
tomorrow with Elijah's shrink.

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Uh-huh.

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Yeah. I think we're
finally getting down

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to the bottom of this
acid stomach, aren't we?

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Come here.

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Just get down from the...

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She thinks that it's
some sort of childhood trauma.

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- Feelings of inadequacy as a
chimp, you know? - Mmm-hmm.

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Careful.
Isn't that interesting?

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Mmm-hmm.

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I find it really interesting.

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So, honey, have you thought any
more about us having a baby?

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Uh...

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You know, I think it's just so tough
right now, economically and all...

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Mmm-hmm.

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...that I think maybe we should just
wait and see if this job thing pays off.

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- You know?
- Okay.

00:16:33.760 --> 00:16:35.719
I was thinking about
what you were saying

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about the orientation film
being bullshit.

00:16:38.014 --> 00:16:39.181
Yes?

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I think maybe
you're on to something.

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And 50 other lines
to get into a girl's pants.

00:16:43.812 --> 00:16:45.771
No, no!

00:16:45.855 --> 00:16:49.608
No, I was just talking about the...
You know, about the film.

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Here's the thing.

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If you ever got me,

00:16:54.739 --> 00:16:57.866
you wouldn't have a clue
what to do with me.

00:17:00.954 --> 00:17:03.956
I wasn't...
I was talking about the film.

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Ooh, what magic those fingers could
work on the right cabinet, mmm.

00:17:13.883 --> 00:17:16.218
Maybe you could alphabetize me.

00:17:16.720 --> 00:17:18.137
And don't forget,

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"I" comes before "U."

00:17:23.852 --> 00:17:26.312
Floris,
I think you're very nice,

00:17:27.022 --> 00:17:30.858
but the truth is that
I'm in love with someone else.

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I'm afraid I have no idea
what you're saying to me.

00:17:35.447 --> 00:17:36.947
You bastard.

00:17:37.073 --> 00:17:38.240
What?

00:17:38.616 --> 00:17:41.702
- Don't toy with Floris, Schwartz.
- Oh, no...

00:17:41.786 --> 00:17:44.705
If I was 80 years younger,
I'd box your ears.

00:17:44.789 --> 00:17:47.833
I wasn't toying with her, sir.
I wouldn't...

00:17:48.209 --> 00:17:49.543
Pardon me.
How old are you, sir?

00:17:49.627 --> 00:17:51.587
One hundred and five.

00:17:52.088 --> 00:17:54.423
Carrot juice, and lots of it.

00:17:54.883 --> 00:17:58.177
I swear, sometimes it's not worth it.
I piss orange.

00:17:58.636 --> 00:18:02.598
And I have to piss sitting down
like a goddamn girly-girl,

00:18:02.682 --> 00:18:04.391
- every 15 minutes.
- Mmm.

00:18:04.476 --> 00:18:06.518
But nobody wants to die.

00:18:07.145 --> 00:18:10.064
Ah, to be a young man again,
eh, Schwartz?

00:18:10.815 --> 00:18:13.359
Maybe then
Floris would care for me.

00:18:14.903 --> 00:18:18.113
But the elderly have so much to offer, sir.
They're our link with history.

00:18:18.198 --> 00:18:20.741
I don't wanna be
your goddamn link, damn ya.

00:18:20.825 --> 00:18:24.328
I want to feel Florie's
naked thighs next to mine.

00:18:24.954 --> 00:18:29.583
I want my body to inspire lust in
that beautiful, complex woman.

00:18:30.043 --> 00:18:35.255
I want her to shiver with a spasm of ecstasy,
Schwartz, as I penetrate her wet...

00:18:35.340 --> 00:18:39.093
Dr. Lester, while I'm flattered you
would share your feelings with me,

00:18:39.177 --> 00:18:43.097
perhaps the workplace is not the most suitable
environment for this type of discussion.

00:18:43.181 --> 00:18:44.556
All right. You're right.

00:18:44.641 --> 00:18:49.395
I'll tell you what. Meet me after work
today at Jerry's Juiceteria on Lex

00:18:49.479 --> 00:18:52.398
and I'll spill
my goddamn guts for ya.

00:18:55.151 --> 00:18:58.153
No, I won't be late, Lotte.
I just have to, you know,

00:18:58.655 --> 00:19:01.698
listen to Lester's sexual fantasies
and drink carrot juice for a while.

00:19:01.783 --> 00:19:03.909
It's a job thing, really.

00:19:06.913 --> 00:19:09.123
Yeah. So,
I'll talk to you later, okay?

00:19:09.207 --> 00:19:10.582
Yeah. You too.

00:19:10.667 --> 00:19:13.293
Gotta go back to work.
Okay, bye.

00:19:15.213 --> 00:19:19.341
Hi. Do you know that I don't even
know your name or where you work?

00:19:19.509 --> 00:19:20.759
Yeah.

00:19:23.471 --> 00:19:25.556
Um, okay, how about this?

00:19:25.974 --> 00:19:27.724
If I can guess your name
in three tries,

00:19:27.809 --> 00:19:30.894
you have to come
have a drink with me tonight.

00:19:31.980 --> 00:19:33.439
Why not?

00:19:33.898 --> 00:19:36.150
Okay.

00:19:36.609 --> 00:19:38.277
You look like a...

00:19:42.031 --> 00:19:43.323
Bar...

00:19:44.868 --> 00:19:46.160
Ru...

00:19:48.288 --> 00:19:50.998
Bell... Lu...

00:19:51.374 --> 00:19:53.834
L... Carol...

00:19:53.918 --> 00:19:56.712
Ta... Shar...

00:19:56.963 --> 00:19:59.006
Susann...

00:19:59.507 --> 00:20:03.218
Emm...ily...

00:20:03.303 --> 00:20:05.971
Mar...lar...

00:20:06.055 --> 00:20:09.391
Maax...ine... M-M-M-Maxine?

00:20:09.726 --> 00:20:11.935
Yeah! Who told you?

00:20:12.228 --> 00:20:14.688
Nobody told me.
That just came out.

00:20:15.231 --> 00:20:16.857
Isn't that odd?

00:20:18.234 --> 00:20:20.444
So where do you live and stuff?

00:20:21.070 --> 00:20:23.864
I am dubious,
but I don't welsh.

00:20:24.866 --> 00:20:27.409
Okay, meet me
at The Stuck Pig, 7:00.

00:20:28.745 --> 00:20:30.621
If you're late, I walk.

00:20:31.414 --> 00:20:33.040
Nubile. Blonde.

00:20:33.333 --> 00:20:34.791
Wet with desire.

00:20:34.876 --> 00:20:37.461
Me in leather.
A harness, if you like.

00:20:37.587 --> 00:20:40.923
And all eyes, Craig,
are upon me as I speak.

00:20:41.341 --> 00:20:45.427
"Ladies," I begin.
"I am the love god Eros."

00:20:45.803 --> 00:20:47.221
They like that.

00:20:47.305 --> 00:20:49.181
"I intoxicate you.

00:20:49.349 --> 00:20:52.309
"My spunk is, to you,
manna from heaven."

00:20:52.435 --> 00:20:55.562
Dr. Lester, this is all
really fascinating and stuff,

00:20:55.647 --> 00:20:58.565
but I gotta
get back home to my wife.

00:20:58.650 --> 00:21:00.651
You have a wife.
I'd like to meet her.

00:21:00.735 --> 00:21:03.529
- Yes, sir.
- Shall we say dinner Thursday?

00:21:04.280 --> 00:21:06.365
You can come, too, if you like.

00:21:06.449 --> 00:21:08.033
Get that? That was a joke.

00:21:08.117 --> 00:21:09.826
You hear what I said?
You can come too.

00:21:09.911 --> 00:21:11.578
That was a good one.

00:21:11.663 --> 00:21:13.997
- All right. Thank you.
- Yeah.

00:21:23.258 --> 00:21:25.300
Maxine. Maxine.

00:21:25.468 --> 00:21:27.553
- I made it, Maxine.
- Just.

00:21:27.679 --> 00:21:29.846
Buy you a drink, Maxine?

00:21:29.931 --> 00:21:31.557
Are you married?

00:21:33.643 --> 00:21:35.269
Yeah. But enough about me.

00:21:35.353 --> 00:21:36.478
Yeah.

00:21:38.189 --> 00:21:39.398
What'll you have?

00:21:39.482 --> 00:21:41.400
I'll have more of the same,
please, Barry.

00:21:41.484 --> 00:21:44.236
And I'll have, uh,
a light beer or something.

00:21:44.320 --> 00:21:45.696
Hi.

00:21:48.992 --> 00:21:50.409
So, uh...

00:21:51.578 --> 00:21:53.662
I don't know... I, uh...

00:21:54.330 --> 00:21:56.915
I like you. I don't know what
it is about you. I just...

00:21:57.000 --> 00:21:59.084
- My tits?
- No! No, no, no, no.

00:21:59.168 --> 00:22:02.796
- No? - It's your energy, attitude,
the way you carry yourself.

00:22:02.880 --> 00:22:04.047
You're not a fag, are you?

00:22:04.132 --> 00:22:06.425
No. I am
really attracted to you.

00:22:06.509 --> 00:22:09.094
"I am really attracted to you."
Christ, you are a fag.

00:22:09.178 --> 00:22:11.263
Well, we can share recipes
if you like, Darlene.

00:22:11.347 --> 00:22:14.266
No, wait! I love your tits.
I wanna fuck 'em.

00:22:14.350 --> 00:22:16.476
Now we're gettin' somewhere.

00:22:16.603 --> 00:22:18.937
Not a chance.

00:22:19.439 --> 00:22:22.399
So tell me about yourself, huh?

00:22:22.900 --> 00:22:26.862
If you can get your mind out of
the gutter long enough, dog boy.

00:22:27.155 --> 00:22:29.323
Well, I'm a puppeteer.

00:22:29.407 --> 00:22:31.116
- I...I've been...
- Check.

00:22:36.873 --> 00:22:38.081
Hey.

00:22:38.708 --> 00:22:39.916
Hey.

00:22:40.001 --> 00:22:42.502
I'm sorry I'm so late.
I just...

00:22:42.670 --> 00:22:45.297
Lester just wouldn't
let me get away.

00:22:45.381 --> 00:22:48.592
Hi, Elijah. We're supposed to
have dinner with him on Thursday

00:22:48.676 --> 00:22:50.969
but I can get us out of it,
if you want.

00:22:51.054 --> 00:22:53.555
He's like this insane old lech,

00:22:53.640 --> 00:22:57.809
and it's kind of amusing once you get
past how disgusting it actually is.

00:22:57.894 --> 00:23:00.479
- Did you eat?
- No. I'm not hungry.

00:23:00.563 --> 00:23:02.981
I'm sorry I didn't call.
It was just hard to get away.

00:23:03.066 --> 00:23:04.483
I was worried.

00:23:04.567 --> 00:23:05.984
I'm sorry.

00:23:08.237 --> 00:23:09.446
You know...

00:23:11.824 --> 00:23:13.909
you wanted me to work.

00:23:17.246 --> 00:23:18.497
How was your evening?

00:23:18.581 --> 00:23:19.956
Well...

00:23:20.750 --> 00:23:23.251
Tom-Tom's puncture wound
is infected.

00:23:23.336 --> 00:23:24.795
The ferret?

00:23:25.254 --> 00:23:26.963
- The iguana.
- Right.

00:23:28.257 --> 00:23:31.635
So I just dressed the wound and
I've just been feeding everyone

00:23:31.719 --> 00:23:34.096
and putting everybody to bed.

00:23:35.264 --> 00:23:36.348
You want a beer?

00:23:36.432 --> 00:23:38.850
No. I think
I'm going to go to bed.

00:23:38.935 --> 00:23:41.520
Elijah's gonna
sleep with us tonight.

00:23:41.604 --> 00:23:43.188
I don't think
he's feeling very well.

00:23:43.272 --> 00:23:45.315
- Okay. Hmm.
- Yeah.

00:23:46.776 --> 00:23:50.862
Well, you know what? I'm gonna go
in my workshop for a little while.

00:23:50.947 --> 00:23:52.406
But I'll be in
in a little while.

00:23:52.490 --> 00:23:53.782
Okay.

00:24:36.284 --> 00:24:39.453
Tell me, Craig,
why do you love puppeteering?

00:24:42.123 --> 00:24:45.917
Well, Maxine,
I'm not sure exactly.

00:24:46.002 --> 00:24:49.504
Perhaps it's the idea of becoming
someone else for a little while.

00:24:49.672 --> 00:24:51.798
Being inside another skin,

00:24:52.216 --> 00:24:55.135
thinking differently,
moving differently,

00:24:55.678 --> 00:24:57.596
feeling differently.

00:24:58.347 --> 00:25:00.182
Interesting, Craig.

00:25:01.017 --> 00:25:03.518
Would you like
to be inside my skin,

00:25:04.270 --> 00:25:07.647
think what I think,
feel what I feel?

00:25:10.902 --> 00:25:13.111
More than anything, Maxine.

00:25:17.033 --> 00:25:19.159
It's good in here, Craig.

00:25:19.702 --> 00:25:22.537
It's better than
your wildest dreams.

00:25:50.733 --> 00:25:53.151
You're not somebody I could
get interested in, Craig.

00:25:53.236 --> 00:25:55.028
You play with dolls.

00:25:55.321 --> 00:26:00.033
Puppets, Maxine. It's the idea of
being inside someone else's skin

00:26:00.451 --> 00:26:03.870
and seeing what they see
and feeling what they feel.

00:26:04.205 --> 00:26:05.413
Yikes!

00:26:05.498 --> 00:26:07.916
It's just that, well...
Please let me explain.

00:26:08.084 --> 00:26:10.585
I've never
done this before, but...

00:26:10.670 --> 00:26:12.838
I feel something for you,

00:26:12.922 --> 00:26:15.340
and I've never
felt this way before.

00:26:15.424 --> 00:26:18.468
You know, about anybody,
n-not even my wife.

00:26:19.262 --> 00:26:21.012
And I just...

00:26:21.097 --> 00:26:24.558
I really feel that you and I
belong together, Maxine.

00:26:25.142 --> 00:26:26.268
Oh!

00:26:51.586 --> 00:26:52.794
Shit.

00:28:15.503 --> 00:28:18.171
- See you later.
- Hello. Mail room.

00:28:21.509 --> 00:28:24.010
Yeah. Yeah.
What's the file number?

00:28:25.304 --> 00:28:28.264
3-2-3-6-4. Yep.

00:29:09.932 --> 00:29:11.099
Oh!

00:30:26.884 --> 00:30:30.512
Oh, you know what?
The puppeteer told me he loved me today.

00:30:30.721 --> 00:30:33.848
I know, I can't think
of anything more pathetic.

00:30:35.017 --> 00:30:36.392
I'm sorry.

00:30:38.521 --> 00:30:40.522
Good afternoon, sir.

00:30:51.867 --> 00:30:53.701
The Broadhurst Theater, please.

00:31:01.293 --> 00:31:04.546
Hey, say, uh,
ain't you that actor guy?

00:31:04.630 --> 00:31:06.047
Yes.

00:31:06.382 --> 00:31:09.717
John, uh... What is, uh...
John, um, uh...

00:31:11.303 --> 00:31:13.012
Uh, don't tell me. Maplethorpe?

00:31:13.097 --> 00:31:16.558
- Malkovich.
- Malkovich. Right, right. Okay.

00:31:17.518 --> 00:31:20.270
Yeah. I thought you were
all right in that one movie.

00:31:20.354 --> 00:31:21.646
Thank you.

00:31:21.730 --> 00:31:24.149
The one where you played
a jewel thief.

00:31:24.233 --> 00:31:26.484
I never played a jewel thief.

00:31:26.569 --> 00:31:28.903
No? Who am I thinkin' of?

00:31:29.405 --> 00:31:30.947
I don't know.

00:31:31.407 --> 00:31:32.824
Just, uh...

00:31:34.076 --> 00:31:37.787
No, no, I'm pretty sure it was you.
The, uh... 'Cause, uh...

00:32:14.867 --> 00:32:17.410
Yeah. Absolutely, doll.

00:32:18.412 --> 00:32:20.830
Yeah.
I'm just about to close up.

00:32:21.123 --> 00:32:24.876
Wanna meet at the Pig
in 20 minutes? Cool. Bye.

00:32:26.462 --> 00:32:28.838
I'm splitting' for the day,
puppet man.

00:32:28.923 --> 00:32:29.923
Lock up for me, okay?

00:32:30.007 --> 00:32:32.425
Don't you wanna know
what happened to me?

00:32:32.509 --> 00:32:34.844
- No.
- Please, this is important.

00:32:35.429 --> 00:32:36.888
Better be.

00:32:36.972 --> 00:32:38.306
It is.

00:32:44.230 --> 00:32:46.814
There's a tiny door
in my office, Maxine.

00:32:46.899 --> 00:32:51.069
It's a portal, and it takes
you inside John Malkovich.

00:32:51.820 --> 00:32:54.197
You see the world
through John Malkovich's eyes

00:32:54.281 --> 00:32:56.908
and then after about 15
minutes, you're spit out

00:32:56.992 --> 00:32:59.869
into a ditch on the side
of the New Jersey Turnpike.

00:32:59.954 --> 00:33:02.997
Sounds great!
Who the fuck is John Malkovich?

00:33:03.666 --> 00:33:07.043
Oh, he's an actor. He's one of the great
American actors of the 20th century.

00:33:07.127 --> 00:33:09.212
Oh, yeah? What's he been in?

00:33:09.588 --> 00:33:11.756
Lots of things.
That jewel thief movie, for example.

00:33:11.840 --> 00:33:15.009
He's very well respected.
Anyway, the point is

00:33:15.344 --> 00:33:20.139
this is a very odd thing.
It's supernatural,

00:33:20.266 --> 00:33:23.142
for lack of a better word.
I mean, it raises

00:33:23.227 --> 00:33:25.979
all sorts of philosophical-type
questions, you know...

00:33:26.063 --> 00:33:29.607
about the nature of self,
about the existence of a soul.

00:33:29.692 --> 00:33:32.485
You know, am I me?
Is Malkovich Malkovich?

00:33:33.862 --> 00:33:37.532
I had a piece of wood in my hand.
I don't have it anymore.

00:33:37.908 --> 00:33:40.618
Where is it? Did it disappear?

00:33:40.703 --> 00:33:43.955
How could that be?
Is it still in Malkovich's head?

00:33:44.373 --> 00:33:45.957
I don't know!

00:33:47.042 --> 00:33:51.546
Do you see what a metaphysical
can of worms this portal is?

00:33:55.551 --> 00:34:00.179
I don't see how I could go on living
my life the way I've lived it before.

00:34:16.905 --> 00:34:18.698
- Yeah?
- So I've been thinking,

00:34:18.782 --> 00:34:20.491
is this Malkovich fellow
appealing?

00:34:20.576 --> 00:34:23.745
Maxine! Yes, of course,
Maxine. He's a celebrity.

00:34:24.330 --> 00:34:26.372
Good. We'll sell tickets.

00:34:27.333 --> 00:34:28.958
Tickets to Malkovich?

00:34:29.043 --> 00:34:31.502
Exactly. $200 a pop.

00:34:33.839 --> 00:34:37.675
But, Maxine, there's something, I
don't know, like profound here.

00:34:37.760 --> 00:34:41.137
I don't know if maybe we
should exploit it. You think?

00:34:41.680 --> 00:34:45.516
I need you for this, Craigy.
You're my man on the inside.

00:34:45.601 --> 00:34:47.101
You need me?

00:34:47.436 --> 00:34:49.187
I'm your man?

00:34:50.439 --> 00:34:51.981
Sure, whatever.

00:34:53.359 --> 00:34:55.568
Hey, everybody, I'm home.

00:34:56.070 --> 00:34:57.695
Treats for everyone.

00:34:57.780 --> 00:34:59.447
- Maxine?
- Yeah?

00:35:00.282 --> 00:35:03.201
We don't know the significance
of this thing.

00:35:03.285 --> 00:35:05.787
It might be dangerous
to toy with?

00:35:06.288 --> 00:35:09.624
Well,
I'll protect you, doll face.

00:35:10.542 --> 00:35:11.793
Bye-bye.

00:35:15.756 --> 00:35:17.298
Who was that?

00:35:18.133 --> 00:35:22.053
I'm going to be working a lot of
late nights with this partner

00:35:22.137 --> 00:35:24.097
because Lestercorp's open
during the day,

00:35:24.181 --> 00:35:26.015
so I'll be working
a lot of late nights.

00:35:26.100 --> 00:35:29.435
But it's a good thing, 'cause it's gonna
get us out of the hole financially

00:35:29.520 --> 00:35:30.812
'cause we're gonna
turn it into a business.

00:35:30.896 --> 00:35:34.148
But I don't understand.
There's not...

00:35:34.358 --> 00:35:38.736
There's no such thing as a hole, or
a portal, into somebody's brain.

00:35:38.821 --> 00:35:43.074
Yes, there is.
A brain, or soul or whatever.

00:35:43.158 --> 00:35:45.868
I was inside John Malkovich
lookin' out.

00:35:46.870 --> 00:35:48.371
- Really?
- Yep.

00:35:48.455 --> 00:35:49.914
I wanna try it.

00:35:49.998 --> 00:35:51.040
Pardon me?

00:35:51.125 --> 00:35:54.127
I want to be
John Malkovich, tomorrow.

00:35:54.211 --> 00:35:56.546
That'd be perfect, 'cause then
I can meet your partner.

00:35:56.630 --> 00:35:59.674
The thing is, Lestercorp's
open during the day,

00:35:59.758 --> 00:36:04.303
so we can't go during the day.
But if you want to, we can do it right now.

00:36:04.513 --> 00:36:06.264
- Now? Right now?
- Tonight.

00:36:06.348 --> 00:36:08.850
Right now,
on the way to Lester's.

00:36:20.154 --> 00:36:24.157
I'll meet you on the side of the
road by the New Jersey Turnpike.

00:36:29.746 --> 00:36:31.205
I'm scared.

00:36:32.624 --> 00:36:35.251
You don't have to do this,
you know.

00:36:37.463 --> 00:36:40.840
No. No, I...I wanna go.

00:36:41.842 --> 00:36:44.135
- You sure? Okay.
- Yeah.

00:37:04.239 --> 00:37:05.907
It's wet.

00:37:07.826 --> 00:37:09.160
Weird.

00:37:17.085 --> 00:37:19.045
That's nice. Oh!

00:37:20.422 --> 00:37:23.424
Oh, mmm!

00:37:24.384 --> 00:37:26.052
Oh! Mmm.

00:37:27.012 --> 00:37:30.097
God. I feel sexy.

00:37:37.981 --> 00:37:40.274
Lotte, are you all right?

00:37:45.113 --> 00:37:48.074
Craig! Craig, I gotta go back!
No!

00:37:48.492 --> 00:37:51.911
- Maybe tomorrow.
- No! I gotta go back now!

00:37:51.995 --> 00:37:54.205
We'll talk about it later.

00:37:57.084 --> 00:37:59.627
Being inside
did something to me.

00:38:00.295 --> 00:38:01.963
I knew who I was.

00:38:07.052 --> 00:38:10.763
It's like everything made sense.
I...I knew who I was.

00:38:10.847 --> 00:38:13.558
But you weren't you.
You were John Malkovich.

00:38:13.642 --> 00:38:16.727
God, I was. I was, wasn't I?

00:38:18.981 --> 00:38:20.147
I was...

00:38:20.232 --> 00:38:23.150
I was John Malkovich.

00:38:25.654 --> 00:38:28.781
I was... I was
John fucking Malkovich!

00:38:32.661 --> 00:38:33.828
Take me back, Craig.

00:38:33.912 --> 00:38:35.830
We're late for Lester.

00:38:40.419 --> 00:38:43.963
So tell me, Lotte, can you
understand a word I'm saying?

00:38:45.007 --> 00:38:46.799
Oh, yes, Dr. Lester.
Absolutely.

00:38:46.883 --> 00:38:50.428
You were just explaining
the nutritional value

00:38:50.679 --> 00:38:54.932
of ingesting minerals through a colloidal
form which I couldn't agree more with.

00:38:55.017 --> 00:38:57.184
Oh! Be still, my heart.

00:39:01.523 --> 00:39:04.984
Dr. Lester, would you mind pointing
me in the direction of the restroom?

00:39:05.068 --> 00:39:09.530
With the greatest pleasure, my dear.
You go up the grand escalier

00:39:10.699 --> 00:39:13.826
and once atop the stairs you'll
want to enter the, uh...

00:39:13.910 --> 00:39:17.788
fifth door on my left.
Watch the step down. It's sunken.

00:39:17.873 --> 00:39:19.707
Okay. Thank you.

00:40:18.767 --> 00:40:21.477
"Malkovich
Physical Development."

00:40:33.949 --> 00:40:37.785
What do you think Lester's
relationship with John Malkovich is?

00:40:40.414 --> 00:40:44.041
That portal's been boarded up forever.
I bet Lester's not even aware of it.

00:40:44.126 --> 00:40:46.585
Him, the portal. Why?

00:40:47.337 --> 00:40:49.088
No reason. I was just thinking.

00:40:49.172 --> 00:40:52.758
Do you think that it's kind of weird
that John Malkovich has a portal?

00:40:52.843 --> 00:40:56.429
Do you think that it might have some
sort of significance, for example?

00:40:56.513 --> 00:40:59.098
I don't know.
Why do you think that?

00:40:59.182 --> 00:41:00.683
I don't even care.

00:41:00.767 --> 00:41:04.603
I think it's kind of sexy that
John Malkovich has a portal.

00:41:04.688 --> 00:41:07.398
Sort of like
it's like he's a vagina.

00:41:07.482 --> 00:41:09.692
It's sort of vaginal,
like he has a...

00:41:09.776 --> 00:41:12.194
he has a penis and a vagina.

00:41:12.863 --> 00:41:17.241
It's sort of like
Malkovich's feminine side.

00:41:19.369 --> 00:41:20.870
I like that.

00:41:24.332 --> 00:41:26.792
"Visit J.M. Inc.
Mertin Flemmer Building.

00:41:26.877 --> 00:41:29.837
"Nightly from 9:00 p.m.
to 4:00 a.m."

00:41:29.921 --> 00:41:31.088
Sounds good.

00:41:31.173 --> 00:41:32.923
Oblique but intriguing.
Phone it in.

00:41:33.008 --> 00:41:35.176
- Want me to phone it in?
- No.

00:41:37.888 --> 00:41:39.138
Lotte!

00:41:39.598 --> 00:41:41.849
Hi. I heard your voice.

00:41:42.184 --> 00:41:44.268
What are you doing here?

00:41:44.895 --> 00:41:47.605
Is this your partner?
She's pretty.

00:41:48.398 --> 00:41:52.026
I had to do the Malkovich ride
again, you know? Is this her?

00:41:52.110 --> 00:41:54.028
- Hi. You're Craig's wife?
- Yeah. Hi.

00:41:54.112 --> 00:41:56.530
Lotte, Maxine. Maxine, Lotte.

00:41:56.865 --> 00:41:59.283
Have you done Malkovich yet?

00:41:59.367 --> 00:42:01.911
Uh, hi.
Yeah, I want to place an ad.

00:42:01.995 --> 00:42:04.038
Okay. "Ever want to be
someone else?"

00:42:04.122 --> 00:42:07.458
No, that's the ad, but we can
talk about you in a minute.

00:42:07.542 --> 00:42:12.254
"Ever want to be someone else?
Now you can. Visit J.M. Inc."

00:42:12.714 --> 00:42:16.091
Inc. Mertin.
M-E-R-T-I-N. Flemmer.

00:42:16.176 --> 00:42:18.302
You should really be at work.

00:42:21.264 --> 00:42:25.518
I've been going over and over my
experience last night, Craig.

00:42:27.103 --> 00:42:28.896
It was amazing.

00:42:30.565 --> 00:42:34.944
I've decided
that I'm a transsexual.

00:42:35.445 --> 00:42:37.321
I know it's
the craziest thing, Craig!

00:42:37.405 --> 00:42:38.489
What, are you fuckin' nuts?

00:42:38.573 --> 00:42:42.660
No. It's just that for the first
time, everything just felt right.

00:42:44.162 --> 00:42:46.080
I've got to make sure.

00:42:46.790 --> 00:42:49.250
But if the feeling
is still there,

00:42:51.086 --> 00:42:55.172
I'm going to talk to Dr.
Feldman about sexual reassignment surgery.

00:42:55.257 --> 00:42:57.842
This is absurd!
Besides, Feldman is an allergist.

00:42:57.926 --> 00:42:59.260
If you're going to
do something, do it right.

00:42:59.344 --> 00:43:01.053
We talked about this
a million times.

00:43:01.137 --> 00:43:03.806
You get these half-assed ideas,
and then you do a half-assed job.

00:43:03.890 --> 00:43:04.890
Just drop it.

00:43:04.975 --> 00:43:06.851
It's just that I really,
you know,

00:43:06.935 --> 00:43:08.686
like Dr. Feldman. All right?

00:43:08.770 --> 00:43:11.438
So I thought that
I would ask him his opinion.

00:43:11.523 --> 00:43:14.108
Is there something
so terrible about that?

00:43:14.192 --> 00:43:15.734
Why do you always
yell at me like this?

00:43:15.819 --> 00:43:17.611
Sweetie, I'm sorry.

00:43:17.696 --> 00:43:22.157
It's just a phase. It's the thrill of
seeing through somebody else's eyes.

00:43:22.242 --> 00:43:23.868
Okay? It'll pass.

00:43:24.911 --> 00:43:27.538
Don't stand in the way
of my actualization as a man.

00:43:29.207 --> 00:43:31.000
Let her go, Craig.

00:43:31.084 --> 00:43:32.835
- Okay.
- I mean him.

00:43:33.962 --> 00:43:35.629
Right now?

00:43:37.382 --> 00:43:38.591
Uh-huh.

00:43:39.634 --> 00:43:42.595
It's the middle of the day.
How am I going to get her past Lester?

00:43:42.679 --> 00:43:44.013
Yawn. Figure it out.

00:43:44.097 --> 00:43:46.265
Okay. Let's go. Come on.

00:43:46.975 --> 00:43:48.642
- Bye.
- Bye.

00:43:59.571 --> 00:44:01.488
Davey, it's Max.

00:44:02.198 --> 00:44:05.492
Listen, can you get me
John Malkovich's home phone?

00:44:06.369 --> 00:44:11.165
"But what I had been through.
I am hungry as the winter.

00:44:11.416 --> 00:44:15.336
"I am sick, anxious,
poor as a beggar.

00:44:16.338 --> 00:44:18.839
"Fate has tossed me
hither and thither.

00:44:19.257 --> 00:44:21.884
"I have been everywhere.
Everywhere."

00:44:22.010 --> 00:44:24.386
- So strong.
- "But wherever I have been,

00:44:24.512 --> 00:44:26.889
- "every minute, day and night...
- I want that voice.

00:44:27.015 --> 00:44:31.185
- "my soul has been full of mysterious anticipations.
- My soul has been full...

00:44:31.311 --> 00:44:34.772
- of mysterious anticipation.
- "I feel the approach of happiness.

00:44:34.856 --> 00:44:37.316
"Anya, I see it coming."

00:44:42.530 --> 00:44:43.906
Yeah?

00:44:43.990 --> 00:44:46.408
- Mr. John Malkovich?
- Yeah. Who's calling?

00:44:46.493 --> 00:44:48.452
Oh, my goodness!

00:44:48.536 --> 00:44:50.913
You don't know me,
but I know you.

00:44:50.997 --> 00:44:53.165
I'm a great admirer of yours.

00:44:54.000 --> 00:44:55.834
How did you get this number?

00:44:56.378 --> 00:45:00.965
Well... it's just that I...
I... I dream about you.

00:45:01.049 --> 00:45:05.469
And well, even speaking to you now has
gotten me sort of excited, you know?

00:45:05.553 --> 00:45:08.764
Wow, the way
this woman's talking to him.

00:45:09.683 --> 00:45:11.892
Listen, I really don't
find this amusing.

00:45:12.018 --> 00:45:13.852
Don't call here anymore, okay?

00:45:13.937 --> 00:45:17.439
Well! My nipples are at attention,
General Malkovich, sir.

00:45:17.524 --> 00:45:20.150
What, her nipples?

00:45:20.235 --> 00:45:22.903
So, listen, why don't we
have dinner tonight?

00:45:22.988 --> 00:45:26.991
Bernardo's? 8:00?
I really want to see you.

00:45:27.075 --> 00:45:30.244
I just loved you
in that jewel thief movie.

00:45:34.582 --> 00:45:36.333
You're not gonna
meet her there?

00:45:36.459 --> 00:45:37.876
Come on!

00:45:37.961 --> 00:45:41.255
Meet her. Meet her there.
Meet her there! Meet her there!

00:45:42.257 --> 00:45:46.218
I am sick,
anxious, poor as a beggar.

00:45:47.470 --> 00:45:49.513
Meet her there! Meet her there!
Meet her there!

00:45:49.597 --> 00:45:51.932
Meet her there! Meet her there!
Meet her there!

00:45:52.058 --> 00:45:54.018
Everywhere.

00:45:54.102 --> 00:45:55.686
But wherever I have been,

00:45:55.770 --> 00:45:57.479
every minute, day and night...

00:45:57.564 --> 00:46:00.274
Meet her there. Meet her there.
Meet her there.

00:46:00.358 --> 00:46:01.525
Yes!

00:46:07.907 --> 00:46:09.450
How was it?

00:46:09.743 --> 00:46:12.661
I have to go back
at 8:00 exactly, tonight.

00:46:13.830 --> 00:46:15.372
Why?

00:46:15.457 --> 00:46:16.874
Don't crowd me, Craig.

00:46:26.718 --> 00:46:28.886
Excuse me.
Are you John Malkovich?

00:46:28.970 --> 00:46:30.054
Yes, I am.

00:46:30.138 --> 00:46:34.725
Wow. You really are great in that
movie where you play that retard.

00:46:34.809 --> 00:46:36.769
Oh, thank you very much.

00:46:36.853 --> 00:46:38.395
I have a cousin who's a retard.

00:46:38.480 --> 00:46:39.521
Oh. Thank you.

00:46:39.606 --> 00:46:41.440
So, as you might imagine,

00:46:42.650 --> 00:46:45.360
it means a lot to me
to see retards

00:46:46.154 --> 00:46:49.281
portrayed on the silver
screen so compassionately.

00:46:49.365 --> 00:46:52.201
Well, thank you very much.
I appreciate it.

00:46:52.535 --> 00:46:54.161
Good night.

00:46:56.664 --> 00:46:57.831
Maxine?

00:46:59.084 --> 00:47:00.793
- It's Maxine.
- Hi.

00:47:00.877 --> 00:47:02.961
I'm so glad
you decided to come.

00:47:03.046 --> 00:47:04.338
I'm Maxine.

00:47:04.422 --> 00:47:06.423
I'm John. How do you do?

00:47:06.925 --> 00:47:08.592
Good.

00:47:11.805 --> 00:47:14.014
I wasn't sure
I was going to come...

00:47:14.099 --> 00:47:16.850
but I felt, uh,
oddly compelled.

00:47:18.436 --> 00:47:21.855
You're so beautiful.
The way you're looking at me...

00:47:22.357 --> 00:47:24.691
I mean, at him... At us.

00:47:29.114 --> 00:47:32.533
I've never been looked at
like this by a woman before.

00:47:33.368 --> 00:47:34.952
I think I'm sweating.

00:47:35.036 --> 00:47:37.579
I must say, I was
intrigued by your voice.

00:47:38.665 --> 00:47:42.793
And the funny thing is, Mr.
Malkovich, my voice is probably

00:47:42.877 --> 00:47:44.628
the least intriguing thing
about me.

00:47:50.301 --> 00:47:52.010
So, I mean...

00:47:52.095 --> 00:47:54.555
So, how was it?
What was he doing?

00:47:54.973 --> 00:47:56.306
He wasn't doing anything
really.

00:47:56.391 --> 00:47:58.475
He was just
hanging around his apartment.

00:47:58.560 --> 00:48:02.855
I think he's probably just
a really, uh, lonely guy.

00:48:03.273 --> 00:48:05.816
See, men can feel
unfulfilled, too, Lotte.

00:48:05.900 --> 00:48:07.651
I'm glad you're coming
to realize that.

00:48:07.735 --> 00:48:10.028
You shouldn't be so quick to
assume that switching bodies

00:48:10.113 --> 00:48:13.073
is gonna be the answer
to your problems.

00:48:14.159 --> 00:48:16.577
You're right, Craig.
You're right.

00:48:19.122 --> 00:48:21.790
You know what I was thinking?
I was thinking that maybe

00:48:21.875 --> 00:48:24.668
we should invite Maxine
over for dinner one night

00:48:24.752 --> 00:48:27.838
because you guys are partners and I thought
that might be a really nice gesture.

00:48:27.922 --> 00:48:29.256
I think she'd like that.

00:48:29.340 --> 00:48:30.924
- Maxine?
- What?

00:48:31.801 --> 00:48:34.887
The thing is, there's been some
tension between us at work,

00:48:34.971 --> 00:48:36.263
business stuff,

00:48:36.347 --> 00:48:37.848
and I would hate to
expose you to that.

00:48:37.932 --> 00:48:40.100
It'll be okay.

00:48:40.518 --> 00:48:41.894
I'll cook my lasagna,

00:48:41.978 --> 00:48:44.188
we'll smoke a joint,

00:48:45.190 --> 00:48:47.608
and tensions
will just melt away.

00:48:48.568 --> 00:48:52.946
Now, when you say that I can be somebody
else, what do you mean exactly?

00:48:53.364 --> 00:48:55.949
Well, we mean exactly that.

00:48:56.951 --> 00:49:00.954
We can put you inside someone
else's body for 15 minutes.

00:49:01.915 --> 00:49:04.291
Can I be anybody
that I wanna be?

00:49:05.627 --> 00:49:08.795
Well... You... Actually...

00:49:09.214 --> 00:49:10.964
You can be John Malkovich.

00:49:11.049 --> 00:49:12.633
That's perfect!

00:49:12.717 --> 00:49:16.345
It's my second choice,
but it's wonderful. It's...

00:49:19.933 --> 00:49:21.600
I'm a fat man.

00:49:22.185 --> 00:49:24.519
- I am sad and fat...
- $200?

00:49:26.147 --> 00:49:27.981
Oh. Oh, uh, yes.

00:49:36.407 --> 00:49:39.368
- Okay.
- You gotta crawl in there.

00:49:39.661 --> 00:49:41.161
Oh, my God.

00:49:59.430 --> 00:50:00.555
No, that's what I'm saying.

00:50:00.640 --> 00:50:03.433
See, I don't really need
an extra bathmat.

00:50:03.518 --> 00:50:06.353
So if I get the set,
would it be possible

00:50:06.437 --> 00:50:11.233
if I could just get maybe
three extra hand towels...

00:50:12.193 --> 00:50:15.028
Uh, if I get the set
instead of the bathmat?

00:50:15.113 --> 00:50:17.114
- Yes, sir.
- Sure, we can do that.

00:50:17.198 --> 00:50:18.615
Great. That sounds good.

00:50:18.700 --> 00:50:22.452
And for the color, periwinkle?

00:50:22.829 --> 00:50:25.122
Oh, I'm sorry.
We're out of stock in periwinkle.

00:50:25.206 --> 00:50:27.374
Do you want to back order?

00:50:27.875 --> 00:50:31.670
No. I'll, uh,
go with the loden.

00:50:31.879 --> 00:50:33.964
Would you like to order
anything else?

00:50:34.048 --> 00:50:39.845
What is the difference between the
foot-pampering looped cotton rug

00:50:40.972 --> 00:50:42.597
and the bathmat?

00:50:57.947 --> 00:51:00.115
You're my friends. Thank you.

00:51:00.742 --> 00:51:04.036
Did you know that
Eskimos have not one,

00:51:05.288 --> 00:51:09.124
but, 49 words for snow?

00:51:10.460 --> 00:51:11.460
Mmm.

00:51:11.544 --> 00:51:14.212
It's because
they have so much of it.

00:51:17.925 --> 00:51:19.926
So much snow.

00:51:21.763 --> 00:51:24.097
After dinner,
I'll show you my puppets.

00:51:24.182 --> 00:51:25.182
Ah.

00:51:25.266 --> 00:51:28.602
After dinner, I'll introduce
you to my chimp Elijah.

00:51:30.313 --> 00:51:34.232
He has an ulcer right now due
to suppressed childhood trauma.

00:51:34.776 --> 00:51:36.068
But we're working through it.

00:51:39.530 --> 00:51:41.323
Psychotherapy.

00:51:41.407 --> 00:51:42.491
Oh.

00:52:01.636 --> 00:52:03.428
This the bedroom?

00:52:03.554 --> 00:52:05.514
Yeah.

00:52:07.308 --> 00:52:10.018
The thing is,
the way that I see it,

00:52:10.103 --> 00:52:13.021
is, I think
the world is divided

00:52:13.106 --> 00:52:15.399
into those
who go after what they want

00:52:15.483 --> 00:52:18.402
- and then those who don't, right?
- Right.

00:52:18.486 --> 00:52:22.072
The passionate ones, the ones
who go after what they want,

00:52:22.156 --> 00:52:25.242
well, they may not get
what they want.

00:52:28.413 --> 00:52:31.248
But, at least
they remain vital.

00:52:31.332 --> 00:52:32.833
- Yeah.
- Yeah.

00:52:32.917 --> 00:52:38.046
So when they lie on their death
beds, they have, um, few regrets.

00:52:38.714 --> 00:52:40.006
Right?

00:52:45.012 --> 00:52:48.098
And the ones who don't
go after what they want,

00:52:48.182 --> 00:52:51.685
well, who gives a shit
about them, anyway?

00:52:54.856 --> 00:52:57.190
- God! Craig!
- Lotte!

00:52:58.401 --> 00:53:02.070
I don't find you attractive,
hmm? And, Lotte,

00:53:03.281 --> 00:53:05.407
I'm smitten with you.

00:53:05.491 --> 00:53:08.201
I am, but only
when you're in Malkovich.

00:53:08.286 --> 00:53:11.329
When I looked into his eyes last
night, I could feel you peering out.

00:53:11.414 --> 00:53:13.039
- Really?
- Yeah.

00:53:13.541 --> 00:53:15.625
Behind the stubble
and the too prominent brow

00:53:15.710 --> 00:53:17.878
and the male-pattern baldness,

00:53:17.962 --> 00:53:20.338
I sensed your feminine longing.

00:53:21.299 --> 00:53:24.092
And it just slew me.

00:53:24.177 --> 00:53:25.677
Oh, my God!

00:53:26.637 --> 00:53:27.846
Oh!

00:53:28.222 --> 00:53:30.223
Only as John, sweetie.

00:53:30.850 --> 00:53:32.184
Sorry.

00:53:33.895 --> 00:53:36.396
Hey, thanks for
a wonderful dinner.

00:53:37.732 --> 00:53:39.816
No hard feelings, partner?

00:53:57.418 --> 00:53:59.836
- J.M. Inc.
- Hi. It's Lotte.

00:54:00.588 --> 00:54:03.089
I'd like very much
to see you again.

00:54:03.758 --> 00:54:06.551
Can you call him
and invite yourself over?

00:54:07.053 --> 00:54:08.929
Um, when?

00:54:11.098 --> 00:54:14.893
Mmm, tonight, after you close?

00:54:15.561 --> 00:54:18.563
Okay, uh, 4:11.

00:54:20.233 --> 00:54:21.733
4:11?

00:54:22.193 --> 00:54:23.860
Thank you, Maxine.

00:54:24.070 --> 00:54:25.695
You're welcome.

00:54:54.725 --> 00:54:57.519
Thanks so much for having
me over, sugarplum.

00:54:57.603 --> 00:54:59.396
I'm glad you called.

00:54:59.480 --> 00:55:01.565
Shall we to the boudoir?

00:55:05.152 --> 00:55:07.445
A couple of minutes. I'm early.

00:55:22.962 --> 00:55:26.548
So do...do you enjoy being
an actor?

00:55:29.594 --> 00:55:32.596
Sure. Yeah.
It's...it's very rewarding.

00:55:50.489 --> 00:55:51.615
Hi.

00:55:52.366 --> 00:55:53.533
Hi.

00:56:07.840 --> 00:56:09.924
Oh, my sweet Maxine.

00:56:10.593 --> 00:56:12.927
- My darling.
- I love you, Lotte.

00:56:19.560 --> 00:56:21.770
Did you call me Lotte?

00:56:27.026 --> 00:56:28.652
Do you mind?

00:56:31.489 --> 00:56:33.239
No, not really.

00:56:34.575 --> 00:56:36.159
- Oh!
- Oh, God.

00:56:36.243 --> 00:56:38.953
- My sweet, beautiful Lotte.
- Oh!

00:56:39.330 --> 00:56:41.247
Oh, Maxine!

00:56:41.332 --> 00:56:43.667
Yes, Maxine. Yes.

00:56:43.751 --> 00:56:46.544
Maxine, this is...
this is so right.

00:56:46.629 --> 00:56:48.922
Oh! Oh, God.

00:56:58.724 --> 00:57:01.309
- Yes! Wow!
- Yes! Wow!

00:57:36.178 --> 00:57:38.388
You were him, weren't you?

00:57:38.472 --> 00:57:39.597
Yeah.

00:57:39.682 --> 00:57:41.474
And he was with her!

00:57:42.560 --> 00:57:43.685
We love her, Craig.

00:57:43.769 --> 00:57:44.936
"We"?

00:57:45.020 --> 00:57:46.062
John and me.

00:57:46.147 --> 00:57:47.188
Don't forget about me!

00:57:47.273 --> 00:57:49.566
Well, you have the Maxine
action figure to play with!

00:57:51.986 --> 00:57:54.487
I'm sorry. That was nasty.

00:58:24.435 --> 00:58:26.686
You are late, my little cowboy.

00:58:29.607 --> 00:58:32.025
Are you torturing me
on purpose?

00:58:32.985 --> 00:58:34.694
I've fallen in love.

00:58:35.154 --> 00:58:37.071
I don't think so.

00:58:37.198 --> 00:58:40.033
You know why?
Because I've fallen in love!

00:58:40.242 --> 00:58:42.368
And this is what people who
have fallen in love look like.

00:58:42.453 --> 00:58:45.121
Well, you picked
the unrequited variety.

00:58:45.206 --> 00:58:47.457
It's very bad for the skin.

00:58:51.629 --> 00:58:53.588
You're evil, Maxine.

00:58:53.964 --> 00:58:57.300
Do you have any idea what it's like
to have two people look at you

00:58:57.384 --> 00:59:01.387
with total lust and devotion
through the same pair of eyes?

00:59:03.808 --> 00:59:05.058
Wow.

00:59:05.643 --> 00:59:07.727
No, I don't suppose you would.

00:59:07.812 --> 00:59:09.521
It's quite a thrill, Craigy.

00:59:57.611 --> 00:59:59.863
Ahh! What are you doing?

00:59:59.947 --> 01:00:01.698
Oh, my God! Is that real?

01:00:01.782 --> 01:00:02.782
- Yes!
- What is that?

01:00:02.867 --> 01:00:04.409
I don't know
how to use it very well,

01:00:04.535 --> 01:00:07.245
so don't make any sudden moves!

01:00:09.748 --> 01:00:12.500
I'm serious! I'm serious.

01:00:12.626 --> 01:00:14.127
Suck my dick!

01:00:15.629 --> 01:00:18.006
Shut up, okay? Just shut up.

01:00:34.315 --> 01:00:35.440
Craig!

01:00:38.152 --> 01:00:41.613
J.M. Inc. Be all
that someone else can be.

01:00:42.406 --> 01:00:43.907
I need to see you.

01:00:43.991 --> 01:00:45.491
Sweetie!

01:00:46.160 --> 01:00:48.745
Oh, I had so much fun
with you last night.

01:00:48.829 --> 01:00:51.039
Shoot. But it's business hours.

01:00:52.791 --> 01:00:56.419
Tell her what the hell,
close early, live dangerously.

01:00:56.503 --> 01:00:57.921
Say it.

01:00:59.882 --> 01:01:02.342
What the hell, you know?

01:01:04.553 --> 01:01:07.221
Live dangerously. Close early.

01:01:07.306 --> 01:01:08.848
Ooh, doll.

01:01:09.058 --> 01:01:12.060
I love this new
devil-may-care side of you.

01:01:13.479 --> 01:01:17.774
All righty. I'll track down lover boy
and see both of you in one hour.

01:01:17.858 --> 01:01:19.400
Exactamundo.

01:01:24.907 --> 01:01:26.407
Craig!

01:01:27.493 --> 01:01:29.953
What's the matter with you?
Stop it!

01:01:30.037 --> 01:01:33.039
Sit up, okay?
Just sit up. Just sit up.

01:01:41.006 --> 01:01:44.342
Help!
He's locking me in a cage!

01:01:46.387 --> 01:01:48.096
Shut up!

01:01:48.180 --> 01:01:49.931
Shut up!

01:02:01.235 --> 01:02:04.070
Was ever woman
in this humor wooed?

01:02:04.738 --> 01:02:07.490
Was ever woman
in this humor won?

01:02:13.539 --> 01:02:15.415
Tommy, can I take 15?

01:02:17.918 --> 01:02:22.296
- Good night, everybody.
- See you back here at 9:00 p.m. tomorrow.

01:02:27.803 --> 01:02:28.803
Oh!

01:02:28.929 --> 01:02:31.097
Oh, Lotte.

01:02:31.932 --> 01:02:34.225
Lotte, this is so good!

01:02:35.936 --> 01:02:38.271
- My God! This is amazing.
- Lotte!

01:02:39.106 --> 01:02:42.191
I want to touch her breast.
Touch her breast.

01:02:42.776 --> 01:02:45.028
Move right hand
across left breast now.

01:02:45.112 --> 01:02:47.572
- Lotte! - Move right hand
across left breast now!

01:02:47.656 --> 01:02:49.615
Move right hand
across left breast now.

01:02:49.700 --> 01:02:50.867
Holy shit, yes!

01:02:50.951 --> 01:02:52.618
Holy shit, yes!

01:02:52.703 --> 01:02:54.203
Holy shit, he said what I said!

01:02:54.288 --> 01:02:56.289
Shit, he said what I said!

01:02:56.582 --> 01:02:59.208
Lotte? Is that you?

01:02:59.293 --> 01:03:00.710
Yes, yes, sweetheart.

01:03:00.794 --> 01:03:02.670
Yes, sweetheart, yes.

01:03:03.380 --> 01:03:04.964
What the fuck is going on?

01:03:05.049 --> 01:03:07.008
That's not me!
I didn't say that.

01:03:07.092 --> 01:03:08.259
Oh, Lotte.

01:03:08.343 --> 01:03:09.635
Oh, Maxine. Oh...

01:03:12.097 --> 01:03:14.265
Something was making me talk.

01:03:14.349 --> 01:03:17.351
Some goddamn thing
was making me move.

01:03:17.436 --> 01:03:19.854
- I've gotta get out of here.
- Oh, doll face!

01:03:19.938 --> 01:03:23.357
It was just, uh, your
passion for me taking hold.

01:03:23.650 --> 01:03:28.488
No, doll face. I know what my
passion taking hold feels like.

01:03:28.572 --> 01:03:29.739
Bye!

01:03:30.032 --> 01:03:31.407
I did it!

01:03:32.534 --> 01:03:36.829
I made him move his arms across
your girlfriend's glorious tit!

01:03:37.539 --> 01:03:41.209
Oh, and
I made him talk sort of.

01:03:42.586 --> 01:03:44.420
It's just a matter of practice

01:03:44.505 --> 01:03:49.592
before Malkovich is nothing more than another
puppet hanging next to my work table.

01:03:51.804 --> 01:03:54.097
I'll tell you about it when I
get home, okay? All right?

01:03:54.181 --> 01:03:57.683
- Craig! Craig!
- I wanna...

01:04:07.820 --> 01:04:09.779
No, man, I'm sorry to...

01:04:09.863 --> 01:04:12.281
I'm sorry to have
called you like that,

01:04:12.366 --> 01:04:15.034
but I was just really,
really scared.

01:04:15.285 --> 01:04:16.953
I was so freaked out.

01:04:17.037 --> 01:04:22.125
I mean, it was like somebody was
just moving all the way through me,

01:04:22.209 --> 01:04:25.086
moving my arms, moving my
hands, talking for me.

01:04:25.170 --> 01:04:28.464
I mean, literally, I feel
like I'm going crazy, Charlie.

01:04:28.549 --> 01:04:30.299
I'm sure
you're not going crazy.

01:04:30.384 --> 01:04:32.718
You don't understand, man.
It was like nothing I've ever felt before.

01:04:32.803 --> 01:04:35.721
Yeah, yada, yada, yada.
Were you stoned?

01:04:35.806 --> 01:04:38.015
Yes. Yes, I was... Jesus.

01:04:40.894 --> 01:04:43.229
Yes! Yes, I was stoned.

01:04:43.730 --> 01:04:46.357
But what... That doesn't have
anything to do with it.

01:04:46.441 --> 01:04:48.985
Charlie, someone was talking
through my mouth.

01:04:49.069 --> 01:04:51.028
You were stoned.

01:04:51.113 --> 01:04:53.239
Case closed. End of story.

01:04:54.158 --> 01:04:56.742
- How hot is this babe?
- You know what?

01:04:57.244 --> 01:04:59.996
Maybe it was this
Lotte woman talking

01:05:00.080 --> 01:05:02.874
because it could have been her
talking through me.

01:05:02.958 --> 01:05:04.458
Because this...

01:05:04.543 --> 01:05:07.962
The weird thing is this Maxine
likes to call me Lotte.

01:05:08.630 --> 01:05:10.882
Ouch. That is hot.

01:05:11.925 --> 01:05:15.511
Maybe she's using you to channel
some dead, lesbian lover.

01:05:15.596 --> 01:05:18.014
Sounds like my kind of gal.
Let me know when you're done with her, yeah?

01:05:18.098 --> 01:05:22.310
What are you talking about? Done with her, man?
Tonight really freaked me out.

01:05:22.394 --> 01:05:24.854
You're nuts to let a girl go
that calls you Lotte.

01:05:24.938 --> 01:05:26.022
I'll tell you that as a friend.

01:05:26.106 --> 01:05:28.608
Charlie, I don't know
anything about the girl.

01:05:28.692 --> 01:05:31.068
She could be, like,
a fucking witch or something.

01:05:31.153 --> 01:05:32.862
That's even better!

01:05:32.946 --> 01:05:36.616
Hot, lesbian witches. Think about it.
It's fucking genius.

01:05:38.785 --> 01:05:41.120
I gotta know the truth,
Charlie.

01:05:42.122 --> 01:05:44.707
The truth is for suckers,
Johnny boy.

01:06:28.877 --> 01:06:30.253
Thanks.

01:07:19.177 --> 01:07:20.303
Excuse me, sir.

01:07:20.387 --> 01:07:24.432
Exactly what, uh, type of service
does this company provide?

01:07:24.683 --> 01:07:27.560
You get to be John Malkovich
for 15 minutes.

01:07:28.061 --> 01:07:30.021
Two hundred clams.

01:07:32.274 --> 01:07:33.649
I see.

01:07:34.484 --> 01:07:36.652
- No cutting, by the way. No cutting!
- Hey, what the hell?

01:07:42.701 --> 01:07:46.120
Come on! Break it up!
Break it up! Cut it out!

01:07:46.246 --> 01:07:47.580
Everybody gets...

01:07:47.664 --> 01:07:49.415
- It's him.
- It's John Malkovich.

01:07:49.499 --> 01:07:51.917
I'm sorry, Mr. Malkovich.
I hope we didn't hurt you too terribly.

01:07:52.002 --> 01:07:53.461
Get inside!

01:07:55.213 --> 01:07:57.923
- Darling!
- What the fuck is going on?

01:07:58.008 --> 01:08:00.259
- Uh, uh, John Malkovich.
- Huh?

01:08:00.344 --> 01:08:02.261
Mr. Malkovich, sir.

01:08:05.265 --> 01:08:07.892
Mr. Malkovich,
I think I can explain.

01:08:07.976 --> 01:08:09.352
Yeah, explain.

01:08:09.436 --> 01:08:11.520
My name is Craig Schwartz

01:08:11.980 --> 01:08:14.357
and we operate
a little business here

01:08:14.441 --> 01:08:17.610
that simulates,
for our clientele, well, the...

01:08:18.278 --> 01:08:22.573
the experience of... of...
of being you, actually.

01:08:22.783 --> 01:08:23.866
Simulates?

01:08:23.950 --> 01:08:25.701
Yeah, after a fashion.

01:08:25.786 --> 01:08:27.828
What exactly does that mean?

01:08:27.913 --> 01:08:29.580
Well, it's hard to describe.

01:08:29.664 --> 01:08:30.748
I want to do it then.

01:08:30.832 --> 01:08:32.875
That would pale in comparison
to the actual experience.

01:08:32.959 --> 01:08:34.251
I want to do it!

01:08:34.336 --> 01:08:35.878
Right now
Mr. Hiroshi's in the tube...

01:08:35.962 --> 01:08:37.838
Let him do it, Craig.

01:08:38.423 --> 01:08:40.549
Of course.
Right this way, Mr. Malkovich,

01:08:40.634 --> 01:08:42.635
compliments of the house.

01:08:50.477 --> 01:08:52.269
Jesus.

01:09:07.494 --> 01:09:10.830
What happens when a man
goes through his own portal?

01:09:12.165 --> 01:09:13.499
We'll see.

01:09:44.531 --> 01:09:46.407
Malkovich.

01:09:47.200 --> 01:09:49.118
Malkovich, Malkovich.

01:09:50.620 --> 01:09:52.580
Malkovich, Malkovich.

01:09:52.706 --> 01:09:55.082
Malkovich, Malkovich,
Malkovich?

01:09:55.167 --> 01:09:57.042
Malkovich, Malkovich.

01:09:57.377 --> 01:09:58.794
Malkovich?

01:10:07.304 --> 01:10:08.762
Malkovich!

01:10:08.847 --> 01:10:10.222
Malkovich.

01:10:12.559 --> 01:10:13.893
Malkovich.

01:10:15.520 --> 01:10:17.771
Malkovich. Malkovich.

01:10:22.068 --> 01:10:23.652
Malkovich!

01:10:23.737 --> 01:10:26.780
Malkovich, Malkovich

01:10:26.865 --> 01:10:30.242
Malkovich, Malkovich

01:10:30.368 --> 01:10:31.911
- Malkovich.
- Malkovich.

01:10:32.037 --> 01:10:34.330
- Malkovich.
- Malkovich.

01:10:34.998 --> 01:10:37.875
Malkovich, Malkovich

01:10:39.503 --> 01:10:42.254
Malkovich, Malkovich

01:10:42.839 --> 01:10:45.633
- Malkovich, Malkovich
- Malkovich!

01:10:53.850 --> 01:10:54.892
How was it?

01:10:54.976 --> 01:10:56.560
It was amazing this time.

01:10:56.645 --> 01:10:58.229
That was no simulation!

01:10:58.313 --> 01:11:00.022
I know. I'm sorry.

01:11:00.106 --> 01:11:01.482
It's such an honor.

01:11:01.566 --> 01:11:03.192
I have been to the dark side.

01:11:03.276 --> 01:11:05.694
I have seen a world
that no man should see!

01:11:05.779 --> 01:11:09.156
Really? For most people, it's
a rather pleasant experience.

01:11:09.241 --> 01:11:10.866
That portal is mine,

01:11:10.951 --> 01:11:14.745
and it must be sealed forever
for the love of God.

01:11:16.081 --> 01:11:19.500
But, Mr. Malkovich, sir,
with all due respect,

01:11:20.043 --> 01:11:23.879
I discovered that portal.
It's my livelihood. Do you understand?

01:11:23.964 --> 01:11:28.425
It's my head, Schwartz!
It's my head!

01:11:29.844 --> 01:11:31.929
I will see you in court!

01:11:34.641 --> 01:11:39.186
What makes you think I won't be
seeing what you're seeing in court?

01:11:39.271 --> 01:11:41.230
Hey, Malkovich, think fast!

01:11:43.525 --> 01:11:44.733
Fuck!

01:11:45.694 --> 01:11:47.194
Dinner.

01:11:48.238 --> 01:11:53.284
You know, Craig, once this was
a relationship built on love.

01:11:54.744 --> 01:11:56.620
Well, you gave up that claim

01:11:56.705 --> 01:11:59.582
after the first time you stuck
your dick in Maxine, Lotte.

01:11:59.666 --> 01:12:01.667
You fell in love with her
first, Craig.

01:12:01.751 --> 01:12:06.380
Yeah, but I didn't do anything about
it, out of respect for our marriage.

01:12:06.673 --> 01:12:09.425
You didn't do anything
about it, Craig,

01:12:10.010 --> 01:12:15.139
out of respect for the fact that she wouldn't
let you near her with a ten-foot pole!

01:12:21.396 --> 01:12:22.813
That's true.

01:12:27.360 --> 01:12:29.778
God, Lotte, what have I become?

01:12:32.324 --> 01:12:34.533
My wife in a cage
with a monkey.

01:12:34.618 --> 01:12:39.079
Craig. I need to go to the
bathroom and take a shower.

01:12:46.338 --> 01:12:48.922
What am I,
some kind of monster?

01:12:50.508 --> 01:12:53.260
I don't want to be a monster,
Lotte. I don't want to.

01:12:53.345 --> 01:12:55.763
Craig, you're not a monster.
No.

01:12:56.723 --> 01:12:58.599
I know you're not a monster,
honey.

01:12:58.683 --> 01:13:01.060
You're just... You're just

01:13:01.144 --> 01:13:04.730
a very, very confused man.

01:13:07.901 --> 01:13:09.693
I love you so much.

01:13:13.573 --> 01:13:15.074
I love you.

01:13:24.501 --> 01:13:26.335
Come on, Craig.

01:13:34.886 --> 01:13:37.096
- J.M. Inc.
- Maxine?

01:13:37.972 --> 01:13:39.264
Lotte.

01:13:40.016 --> 01:13:42.768
I've been thinking about us,
you know? And, uh...

01:13:42.852 --> 01:13:44.269
We have to meet.

01:13:44.354 --> 01:13:47.481
Um, okay. I'll see you in
Malkovich in one hour.

01:13:48.274 --> 01:13:50.109
Craig!

01:13:52.696 --> 01:13:54.154
I hate you.

01:15:14.110 --> 01:15:17.905
Oh, Elijah!
You really are magnificent.

01:15:22.410 --> 01:15:24.286
- J.M. Inc.
- Maxine!

01:15:24.370 --> 01:15:27.122
Honey pie! I was just heading
out the door to meet you.

01:15:27.207 --> 01:15:31.210
No, listen, Maxine.
It hasn't been me in Malkovich the last time.

01:15:31.294 --> 01:15:32.795
It's been that
son of a bitch, Craig.

01:15:32.879 --> 01:15:35.172
He's had me locked in the cage
with my chimp,

01:15:35.256 --> 01:15:37.633
- holding a gun to my head.
He made me call you. - Oh, my God!

01:15:37.717 --> 01:15:40.010
I'm sorry, Maxine.
It's been him the whole time.

01:15:40.094 --> 01:15:42.596
I'm so sorry. That's horrible.

01:15:42.680 --> 01:15:45.098
I miss you so much, Maxine.

01:15:45.183 --> 01:15:46.600
So... But...

01:15:47.101 --> 01:15:49.436
Okay, that was Craig
inside of Malkovich?

01:15:49.521 --> 01:15:53.065
Yes, it was him.
It's because he's a puppeteer, I think.

01:15:53.566 --> 01:15:56.026
Well, boy, I'm, uh...

01:15:56.778 --> 01:15:58.821
I'm surprised.
That's pretty impressive.

01:15:58.905 --> 01:16:00.072
What?

01:16:00.156 --> 01:16:02.699
So if Craig
can control Malkovich,

01:16:02.867 --> 01:16:05.619
- and I can control Craig...
- But, Maxine,

01:16:05.912 --> 01:16:08.372
I thought it was me
that you loved!

01:16:09.082 --> 01:16:10.332
I do.

01:16:15.088 --> 01:16:18.882
It's confusing, you know?
This is a very confusing situation.

01:16:19.759 --> 01:16:21.051
I know.

01:16:24.639 --> 01:16:28.308
Listen, I
should really get going, okay?

01:16:28.393 --> 01:16:31.103
- 'Cause I'm gonna be late
for Malkovich now. - No.

01:16:31.187 --> 01:16:32.271
What?

01:16:32.355 --> 01:16:34.022
We'll talk about this later,
Lotte.

01:16:34.107 --> 01:16:35.774
Maxine! Wait!

01:16:36.901 --> 01:16:38.527
- Okay?
- Maxine!

01:17:10.894 --> 01:17:13.020
What the fuck do you want?

01:17:13.396 --> 01:17:16.106
I can explain
about the portal, darling.

01:17:19.652 --> 01:17:22.070
Listen, don't con me, Maxine.

01:17:22.155 --> 01:17:23.739
I don't know
who the hell you people are,

01:17:23.823 --> 01:17:26.450
but this insanity is now over.

01:17:26.534 --> 01:17:28.076
Oh, shut up.

01:17:29.329 --> 01:17:31.580
Craigy. Craig.

01:17:32.332 --> 01:17:34.041
Schwartzy, are you in there?

01:17:39.213 --> 01:17:41.673
How did you know it was me?

01:17:41.758 --> 01:17:44.843
Lotte called me.
She escaped your evil clutches.

01:17:46.679 --> 01:17:49.556
Really? Well, I'm really sorry
I did that, Maxine,

01:17:49.641 --> 01:17:50.933
but I'm
really in love with you,

01:17:51.017 --> 01:17:53.644
and I didn't know
how else to be with you.

01:17:53.728 --> 01:17:54.895
Hmm.

01:17:56.689 --> 01:17:59.274
Apparently you can control
this Malkovich fellow now?

01:17:59.359 --> 01:18:01.860
Yes, I'm getting
better all the time.

01:18:01.945 --> 01:18:03.737
I'll say you are.

01:18:03.821 --> 01:18:06.865
Hey, let's do it
on his dining room table.

01:18:07.450 --> 01:18:09.284
Then we'll make him
eat an omelet off of it.

01:18:09.369 --> 01:18:10.911
No!

01:18:10.995 --> 01:18:12.788
Shut up,
you overrated sack of shit!

01:18:15.833 --> 01:18:17.042
Craigy.

01:18:42.276 --> 01:18:43.527
Yes?

01:18:44.779 --> 01:18:47.656
Hi, Dr. Lester.
It's Lotte Schwartz,

01:18:49.075 --> 01:18:50.367
Craig's wife.

01:18:50.451 --> 01:18:53.328
Oh! Yes. Oh, my God.

01:18:53.413 --> 01:18:56.164
You'll catch your death out here.
Look at you. You're soaking wet.

01:18:56.249 --> 01:18:58.417
Please come in, come in.

01:19:05.508 --> 01:19:07.175
Here you are, my dear.

01:19:07.260 --> 01:19:08.677
Thank you.

01:19:10.179 --> 01:19:11.555
How's that?

01:19:11.764 --> 01:19:13.765
Much better, thank you.

01:19:14.100 --> 01:19:17.936
So, my dear, what is it that
brings you to my doorway

01:19:18.021 --> 01:19:20.397
on such
an inhospitable evening?

01:19:20.481 --> 01:19:22.149
Well, Dr. Lester,

01:19:22.525 --> 01:19:24.109
see, I, uh...

01:19:25.486 --> 01:19:28.989
I have a very unhealthy
obsession with John Malkovich.

01:19:30.700 --> 01:19:32.117
I see.

01:19:32.368 --> 01:19:34.494
You mean, the performer.

01:19:35.663 --> 01:19:36.830
Yes.

01:19:36.914 --> 01:19:40.959
And what prompted you
to come to me with this issue?

01:19:41.461 --> 01:19:44.713
Well, when I was here
with my husband for dinner,

01:19:46.049 --> 01:19:50.385
I came upon a room that seemed to be
some sort of John Malkovich museum.

01:19:51.220 --> 01:19:53.972
So I thought
perhaps maybe you would

01:19:54.140 --> 01:19:57.017
have some appreciation
for my state of mind.

01:19:59.854 --> 01:20:01.980
You look so lovely, my dear,

01:20:02.065 --> 01:20:05.859
standing here before the fire
in my oversized man's robe.

01:20:08.321 --> 01:20:10.280
Thank you, Dr. Lester.

01:20:12.658 --> 01:20:14.034
Tell me,

01:20:14.827 --> 01:20:18.163
what is this strange power
that Malkovich exudes?

01:20:18.998 --> 01:20:21.124
You've gotta help me
understand because

01:20:21.209 --> 01:20:23.960
all I think about
is wanting to be him.

01:20:25.421 --> 01:20:27.964
- Wanting to what?
- Wanting to be him.

01:20:28.424 --> 01:20:30.842
Wanting to be John Malkovich.

01:20:32.553 --> 01:20:34.054
Oh, I see.

01:20:35.223 --> 01:20:38.141
Well, perhaps you can.

01:20:39.310 --> 01:20:40.393
But, Dr. Lester...

01:20:40.478 --> 01:20:43.688
I am not Dr. Lester.

01:20:44.524 --> 01:20:46.358
I am Captain Mertin.

01:20:47.693 --> 01:20:49.319
I don't understand.

01:20:49.403 --> 01:20:53.949
It was 90 years ago that I
discovered a strange portal.

01:20:54.033 --> 01:20:58.286
And... And I found that this
portal led to a vessel body

01:20:58.371 --> 01:21:02.415
and that I could live forever by
leaping from vessel to vessel.

01:21:05.878 --> 01:21:08.046
So Dr. Lester is such a vessel?

01:21:08.131 --> 01:21:09.714
Yes, he is.

01:21:11.134 --> 01:21:13.135
You still there, sweets?

01:21:13.219 --> 01:21:14.636
Hmm.

01:21:17.390 --> 01:21:20.517
I figured out how to hang on
as long as I want.

01:21:20.935 --> 01:21:24.271
It's all a matter of making
friends with the Malkovich body.

01:21:24.355 --> 01:21:28.608
Rather than thinking of it as an enemy
that has to be pounded into submission,

01:21:28.693 --> 01:21:33.572
I've begun imagining it as a really
expensive suit that I enjoy wearing.

01:21:41.998 --> 01:21:47.252
Ah, this illustrates how I will move
into my next vessel, Malkovich,

01:21:47.712 --> 01:21:49.504
on his 44th birthday.

01:21:49.839 --> 01:21:51.590
That's when he becomes ripe.

01:21:51.674 --> 01:21:54.634
But I must enter
by midnight on that day.

01:21:54.719 --> 01:21:59.431
After that, I'd get diverted into the
next newly forming infant vessel.

01:21:59.807 --> 01:22:01.516
I don't want that to happen.

01:22:01.601 --> 01:22:03.393
I'd be absorbed.

01:22:03.769 --> 01:22:05.395
Absorbed? What does that mean?

01:22:05.479 --> 01:22:09.774
Well, uh, trapped, held prisoner,
if you like, in the host's brain,

01:22:09.942 --> 01:22:11.735
unable to control anything,

01:22:11.819 --> 01:22:15.780
forever doomed to watch the world
through someone else's eyes.

01:22:18.409 --> 01:22:20.577
Now I'd like you
to meet some friends.

01:22:20.661 --> 01:22:22.913
See, I got lonely
in Lester by myself,

01:22:22.997 --> 01:22:26.708
so I figured out a way this time
to take others along with me.

01:22:26.792 --> 01:22:27.876
Come.

01:22:33.424 --> 01:22:35.675
Everyone, this is Lotte.

01:22:35.760 --> 01:22:37.385
Hi, Lotte!

01:22:37.470 --> 01:22:39.346
She's a new friend of mine.

01:22:44.769 --> 01:22:47.812
Do a puppet show for me,
Craig, honey.

01:22:48.814 --> 01:22:50.899
You mean, with Malkovich?

01:22:51.442 --> 01:22:53.610
- I'd love to see your work.
- Really?

01:22:53.694 --> 01:22:55.320
- Uh-huh.
- Yeah?

01:22:57.365 --> 01:22:58.657
Okay.

01:23:07.792 --> 01:23:13.797
This is something that I call "Craig's
Dance of Despair and Disillusionment."

01:24:46.557 --> 01:24:50.602
That was incredible!
You're... You're brilliant!

01:24:50.936 --> 01:24:54.564
You see, Maxine, it isn't
just playing with dolls.

01:24:55.441 --> 01:24:57.859
Oh, my darling,
it's so much more!

01:24:57.943 --> 01:25:00.111
It's playing with people.

01:25:05.618 --> 01:25:07.577
Stay in him forever.

01:25:10.247 --> 01:25:12.499
My darling, how will we make
a living if our clientele

01:25:12.583 --> 01:25:15.126
doesn't have access
to our product?

01:25:15.211 --> 01:25:19.047
Well, we'll have all the money
in Malkovich's bank account,

01:25:19.131 --> 01:25:21.174
plus he does get
acting work occasionally.

01:25:21.258 --> 01:25:23.134
No, please!

01:25:23.761 --> 01:25:25.678
Shut up!
We're trying to think here.

01:25:25.763 --> 01:25:26.971
Gee!

01:25:28.641 --> 01:25:32.727
It is... It is sort of
like puppeteering.

01:25:33.145 --> 01:25:35.313
I-I-I like that about it.

01:25:35.648 --> 01:25:36.940
Exactly!

01:25:37.942 --> 01:25:41.986
And no one would ever even
have to know it's not him.

01:25:44.407 --> 01:25:47.409
And I could use
Malkovich's existing notoriety

01:25:47.493 --> 01:25:50.161
to launch my own
puppeteering career.

01:25:50.371 --> 01:25:53.081
Oh, Craigy.
Craigy, that's brilliant.

01:25:53.165 --> 01:25:54.541
Oh. Oh.

01:25:54.625 --> 01:25:55.708
So lovely.

01:25:55.793 --> 01:25:58.670
I've always wondered what it
would be like to have a penis.

01:25:58.754 --> 01:26:00.255
- Now I'll know.
- Really?

01:26:00.339 --> 01:26:02.340
- I know it's very...
- Lotte?

01:26:02.883 --> 01:26:04.426
We like you.

01:26:04.677 --> 01:26:07.637
We can see you're a kind
and decent woman

01:26:07.972 --> 01:26:09.848
and so,

01:26:10.015 --> 01:26:14.352
we've decided to offer you a
place in John Malkovich with us,

01:26:14.728 --> 01:26:16.354
if you like.

01:26:20.943 --> 01:26:22.485
Dr. Lester,

01:26:23.154 --> 01:26:26.990
you've been so kind to me
and trusting.

01:26:27.825 --> 01:26:33.663
And there's just something I think you
should know about the Malkovich vessel.

01:26:34.790 --> 01:26:36.708
- John's here to see you.
- Should I send him in?

01:26:36.792 --> 01:26:40.545
Of course send him right in.
Don't ever keep him waiting again, you understand?

01:26:43.340 --> 01:26:45.800
Hey, John.

01:26:46.010 --> 01:26:47.677
Great to see you.

01:26:47.761 --> 01:26:49.471
Sorry about the cunt
at reception.

01:26:49.555 --> 01:26:51.639
This is my fiancee, Maxine.

01:26:51.724 --> 01:26:53.475
Oh, great to see you, Maxine.

01:26:53.559 --> 01:26:54.684
Sorry about the cunt
at reception.

01:26:54.768 --> 01:26:56.728
Please, have a seat.

01:27:01.567 --> 01:27:04.611
Can I get you anything?
Coffee? Water?

01:27:05.070 --> 01:27:06.571
No, thank you.

01:27:06.947 --> 01:27:09.324
- Teresa, get me chicken soup.
- Okay.

01:27:09.408 --> 01:27:11.409
Chicken soup? Chicken soup?

01:27:17.833 --> 01:27:21.836
Larry? Uh, I want to
get right to the point.

01:27:21.921 --> 01:27:25.298
From now on, I'm no longer an actor.
I'm a puppeteer.

01:27:26.425 --> 01:27:28.259
Okay. Great.

01:27:33.098 --> 01:27:36.267
And I would like
to redirect my career

01:27:36.352 --> 01:27:39.312
so that from now on
the name John Malkovich,

01:27:39.396 --> 01:27:42.649
will be synonymous
with puppets.

01:27:43.651 --> 01:27:45.568
Sure. Sure. No problemo.

01:27:45.653 --> 01:27:47.195
Poof, you're a puppeteer.

01:27:47.279 --> 01:27:49.739
Just let me
make a couple calls.

01:28:12.555 --> 01:28:14.055
Honey?

01:28:15.683 --> 01:28:17.976
Maxine? Maxine?

01:28:18.727 --> 01:28:20.311
I'm busy.

01:28:23.023 --> 01:28:25.024
Maxine, honey, it's on!

01:28:33.742 --> 01:28:35.910
Yeah, there's the truth,
and there are lies

01:28:35.995 --> 01:28:39.664
and, uh, art always tells the
truth, even when it's lying.

01:28:39.748 --> 01:28:42.208
The enigmatic John Malkovich,

01:28:42.293 --> 01:28:44.252
one of the world's
greatest entertainers

01:28:44.336 --> 01:28:47.589
and the man who reinvented
how we view puppeteering.

01:28:47.673 --> 01:28:50.258
Tonight we look at the man
above the strings

01:28:50.342 --> 01:28:52.677
and the woman behind the man.

01:28:53.178 --> 01:28:57.765
Raised in Evanston, Illinois, Malkovich
had a lifelong interest in theater arts

01:28:57.850 --> 01:29:00.268
and as a young man was
one of the founding members

01:29:00.352 --> 01:29:03.980
of Chicago's world-renowned
Steppenwolf Theatre Company.

01:29:04.064 --> 01:29:06.274
From there, it was a simple
hop, skip and a jump

01:29:06.358 --> 01:29:09.277
to Broadway accolades
and Hollywood stardom.

01:29:09.361 --> 01:29:13.448
But nothing could prepare the
public for what was to come next.

01:29:14.199 --> 01:29:16.784
And so it was that just
eight short months ago,

01:29:16.869 --> 01:29:18.953
John Malkovich
dropped the bombshell

01:29:19.038 --> 01:29:21.998
that sent shock waves through
the entertainment community.

01:29:22.082 --> 01:29:24.459
Turning his back on
his former profession,

01:29:24.543 --> 01:29:26.586
Malkovich had to
start from scratch

01:29:26.670 --> 01:29:30.131
and pay his dues all over again
as a fledgling puppeteer.

01:29:30.215 --> 01:29:34.302
Hello, ladies and
gentlemen, I'm John Malkovich.

01:29:34.553 --> 01:29:38.306
It's... It's the... I miss...
I'm really John Malkovich.

01:29:39.141 --> 01:29:41.267
From these
inauspicious beginnings...

01:29:41.352 --> 01:29:45.271
John Malkovich's rise to
stardom was fast and furious.

01:29:45.731 --> 01:29:48.399
His breakout performance occurred
at this year's Emmy Awards...

01:29:48.734 --> 01:29:50.234
It's really good!

01:29:50.319 --> 01:29:53.029
I look really amazing.
I'd fuck me.

01:29:53.614 --> 01:29:55.657
If there's anything
that upsets me about it,

01:29:55.741 --> 01:29:58.618
it's feeling like
if I move into it too quickly,

01:29:58.702 --> 01:30:01.162
I'll be, you know,
deemed an imitator.

01:30:01.246 --> 01:30:04.332
But, um, I think that once
we all get the courage

01:30:04.416 --> 01:30:07.293
to just follow through on our
instincts, like Malkovich has,

01:30:07.378 --> 01:30:10.254
I think that, uh, a lot of us
will move into puppetry.

01:30:10.339 --> 01:30:11.839
Malkovich's rise to fame

01:30:11.924 --> 01:30:14.342
brought about
a renaissance in puppeteering.

01:30:14.426 --> 01:30:17.011
No, no, no. What are you doing?
What are you doing?

01:30:17.096 --> 01:30:18.513
I'm making him weep, John.

01:30:18.597 --> 01:30:21.766
You're making him weep,
but you are not weeping.

01:30:21.850 --> 01:30:23.601
Don't ever with your audience.

01:30:23.686 --> 01:30:29.691
Until the... the puppet becomes an
extension of you, it's a novelty act.

01:30:29.775 --> 01:30:32.443
It's, uh... It's Topo Gigio.

01:30:32.695 --> 01:30:34.112
No?

01:30:36.865 --> 01:30:38.866
He's a technical genius.

01:30:38.951 --> 01:30:41.744
He breathes life
into inanimate objects.

01:30:42.121 --> 01:30:46.708
It's a very godlike thing to
be able to take something and,

01:30:46.792 --> 01:30:48.710
you know, make it live.

01:30:48.794 --> 01:30:53.131
He was the talk of the
town from the Beltway to Broadway

01:30:53.924 --> 01:30:58.052
aided in no small part by his new
wife and manager, Maxine Lund.

01:30:58.637 --> 01:31:01.514
In Maxine,
Malkovich had found his mentor

01:31:01.598 --> 01:31:04.142
his muse, his inspiration.

01:31:04.643 --> 01:31:08.813
In Malkovich, Maxine had
found the love of her life.

01:31:10.190 --> 01:31:12.483
There, there, my dear. Relax.

01:31:13.485 --> 01:31:16.571
This travesty will all
be over with by morning.

01:31:16.822 --> 01:31:19.574
And the crowds have been
absolutely sensational

01:31:19.658 --> 01:31:23.035
and, um, I'd just like to thank God
for giving us this opportunity

01:31:23.120 --> 01:31:25.121
to share our creative vision.

01:31:25.205 --> 01:31:26.497
Nothing was impossible

01:31:26.582 --> 01:31:28.916
for John and Maxine
in the early days.

01:31:29.001 --> 01:31:30.835
Their union was a joyous one,

01:31:30.919 --> 01:31:32.587
and together
they worked tirelessly

01:31:32.671 --> 01:31:35.089
to further Malkovich's
puppeteering career.

01:31:35.174 --> 01:31:39.802
John Malkovich, the artist,
and Maxine, the entrepreneur,

01:31:39.887 --> 01:31:41.929
they make this character,

01:31:42.014 --> 01:31:45.725
this protean figure
that we call John Malkovich.

01:31:45.809 --> 01:31:49.937
But some say Maxine has changed
since becoming pregnant,

01:31:50.022 --> 01:31:53.316
recoiling from the limelight
and, rumor has it,

01:31:53.692 --> 01:31:56.152
from her husband's affections.

01:32:04.077 --> 01:32:06.329
I'm so sorry.

01:32:11.668 --> 01:32:14.212
Malkovich shows us

01:32:14.713 --> 01:32:18.049
a reflection of ourselves,
our frailties

01:32:18.258 --> 01:32:21.344
and our, you know,

01:32:21.428 --> 01:32:23.554
desperate humanity.

01:32:24.139 --> 01:32:28.267
That's what makes him one of the
most relevant artists of our time.

01:32:28.977 --> 01:32:32.647
And what does the future
hold for John Horatio Malkovich?

01:32:32.731 --> 01:32:37.151
Well, to quote the Bard, "He's
got the world on a string."

01:32:37.236 --> 01:32:38.861
As the poet said,

01:32:38.946 --> 01:32:42.490
"The puppeteer's voice need not
merely be the record of man.

01:32:42.574 --> 01:32:44.867
"It can be one of the pillars,
the props,

01:32:44.952 --> 01:32:47.203
"to help him endure
and prevail."

01:32:47.287 --> 01:32:49.247
And I believe that.

01:32:49.665 --> 01:32:51.082
It's over!

01:32:53.585 --> 01:32:54.877
Max?

01:32:55.587 --> 01:32:58.339
I've gotta head down
to ABT now.

01:32:58.423 --> 01:33:01.467
I've got the Swan Lake
benefit tonight, okay?

01:33:01.552 --> 01:33:06.848
But when I come back, we can maybe
celebrate Malkovich's big four-four.

01:33:08.100 --> 01:33:09.225
Okay?

01:33:09.935 --> 01:33:13.813
Jesus! Why couldn't I have found
the portal to a younger body?

01:33:13.897 --> 01:33:17.275
What if I... What if I
fall tonight and break my hip?

01:34:08.285 --> 01:34:10.161
Like that, little girl?

01:34:11.663 --> 01:34:13.205
Huh, lamb?

01:34:15.542 --> 01:34:16.918
I love you.

01:34:51.370 --> 01:34:52.995
Bravo!

01:35:00.379 --> 01:35:01.545
Maxine?

01:35:09.096 --> 01:35:10.388
Ma...

01:35:21.650 --> 01:35:23.317
Hello? Hello?

01:35:23.402 --> 01:35:24.819
We have Maxine.

01:35:24.903 --> 01:35:28.322
Oh! My God.
Please, please, don't hurt her.

01:35:28.407 --> 01:35:31.867
Listen, I'll... I'll give you
anything you want. Please.

01:35:31.952 --> 01:35:34.495
You listen to me, asshole.
I don't want your fucking money.

01:35:34.579 --> 01:35:37.873
What I want is for you
to leave John Malkovich now!

01:35:38.750 --> 01:35:40.668
Who... Who is this, Lester?

01:35:40.752 --> 01:35:41.836
Does it matter?

01:35:41.920 --> 01:35:44.755
We're gonna kill Maxine if you
don't leave the body immediately!

01:35:44.840 --> 01:35:49.510
But I-I-I can't do that.
I mean, if-if I leave Malkovich,

01:35:49.594 --> 01:35:53.222
then I'm Craig Schwartz again.
No career, no money.

01:35:53.306 --> 01:35:54.640
Maxine will have
nothing to do...

01:35:54.725 --> 01:35:56.851
She barely has anything
to do with me now.

01:35:56.935 --> 01:36:00.354
Jesus, we're going to kill your
wife, you fucking lunatic!

01:36:01.940 --> 01:36:03.107
God.

01:36:03.191 --> 01:36:05.526
Listen, Schwartz,
Malkovich is our vessel.

01:36:05.610 --> 01:36:09.613
We're old. We're going to die if
we don't get into him by midni...

01:36:25.255 --> 01:36:27.089
He called our bluff.

01:36:29.301 --> 01:36:30.634
Shit!

01:36:31.219 --> 01:36:34.597
Can't we just go inside the
portal and push Craig out?

01:36:34.681 --> 01:36:36.557
No, he's much too powerful.

01:36:36.641 --> 01:36:40.478
Schwartz would just jam us down
into Malkovich's subconscious.

01:37:04.961 --> 01:37:06.337
Lotte.

01:37:09.549 --> 01:37:11.926
If I can't have you,
no one will.

01:37:15.347 --> 01:37:17.515
Lotte, no!

01:37:18.183 --> 01:37:21.060
No, Lotte! God, no,
we can't really kill her!

01:37:21.144 --> 01:37:24.814
She's carrying Malkovich's seed!
Our next vessel!

01:37:32.781 --> 01:37:34.782
Hey! Help me!

01:37:35.826 --> 01:37:37.243
Help me!

01:37:38.578 --> 01:37:40.121
Where the fuck am I?

01:37:40.205 --> 01:37:42.665
We're in
Malkovich's subconscious.

01:37:43.166 --> 01:37:45.334
The last thing
you'll ever see, Maxine.

01:37:48.046 --> 01:37:49.630
Fag-o-vitch!

01:37:49.714 --> 01:37:52.091
Johnny, baby, Johnny.

01:37:57.180 --> 01:38:03.018
- I am bad. I am bad. I am bad.
- I am bad. I am bad. I am bad.

01:38:03.103 --> 01:38:04.979
I am bad. I am bad.

01:38:05.063 --> 01:38:07.898
I am bad. I am bad. I am bad.

01:38:08.567 --> 01:38:10.901
I am bad. I am bad. I am bad.

01:38:22.247 --> 01:38:24.707
Maxine, I am gonna kill you!

01:38:28.753 --> 01:38:30.546
You're creepy.

01:38:41.308 --> 01:38:45.936
- Little Johnny Malk-o-pee!
- Little Johnny Malk-o-pee!

01:38:46.271 --> 01:38:48.981
Wet his pants so all could see!

01:38:49.065 --> 01:38:53.903
Little Johnny Malk-o-pee!
Little Johnny Malk-o-pee!

01:38:55.280 --> 01:38:57.865
Wet his pants so all could see!

01:39:12.005 --> 01:39:13.964
I loved you so much!

01:39:15.717 --> 01:39:18.886
Oh! Why did you have to
hurt me like that?

01:39:19.262 --> 01:39:20.888
I'm sorry, Lotte.

01:39:21.181 --> 01:39:25.184
I guess I loved you, too,
in my way.

01:39:25.769 --> 01:39:29.647
You are so full of shit,
Maxine!

01:39:30.232 --> 01:39:31.482
I know.

01:39:32.651 --> 01:39:33.984
I know!

01:39:38.615 --> 01:39:40.449
It's your baby, okay?

01:39:41.660 --> 01:39:43.160
What?

01:39:43.620 --> 01:39:46.497
The baby, it's yours.

01:39:47.707 --> 01:39:51.085
It's ours. I got pregnant
when you were in Malkovich.

01:39:51.169 --> 01:39:53.796
You cannot fuck with me
anymore, Maxine!

01:39:53.880 --> 01:39:55.214
I'm not!

01:39:56.174 --> 01:39:59.176
I kept it because I knew
you were the father,

01:40:01.972 --> 01:40:04.932
the other mother, whatever,
because I...

01:40:05.016 --> 01:40:07.017
Because it was yours.

01:40:09.688 --> 01:40:11.730
So we're parents?

01:40:13.692 --> 01:40:15.025
Together?

01:40:17.112 --> 01:40:18.404
Yeah.

01:40:37.590 --> 01:40:41.302
Say, uh,
aren't you John Malkovich?

01:40:41.886 --> 01:40:43.679
- No.
- Yeah, you are.

01:40:43.763 --> 01:40:44.888
No.

01:40:45.223 --> 01:40:47.308
I can't believe
you're in this shithole, man.

01:40:47.392 --> 01:40:49.643
You guys know
this is John Malkovich?

01:40:49.728 --> 01:40:51.020
I'm not John Malkovich.

01:40:51.104 --> 01:40:52.646
This is John Malkovich...

01:40:52.731 --> 01:40:55.190
I am not John Malkovich!

01:40:55.275 --> 01:40:57.693
Cut it out, you guys.

01:41:12.083 --> 01:41:14.084
- Yes?
- Lester, please don't do it.

01:41:14.169 --> 01:41:15.794
Please don't kill Maxine.

01:41:15.879 --> 01:41:16.920
So you'll leave?

01:41:17.005 --> 01:41:19.173
Yes, I said...
I, uh...I am leaving.

01:41:19.257 --> 01:41:22.968
All right. Do it now while I'm
on the phone so I can hear

01:41:23.345 --> 01:41:25.012
and your lovely bride walks.

01:41:25.096 --> 01:41:27.806
Uh... Okay. Okay.

01:41:28.641 --> 01:41:30.267
I'm going.

01:41:40.362 --> 01:41:42.696
Now, my friends.
The time is now.

01:42:15.480 --> 01:42:16.980
I'm free.

01:42:20.777 --> 01:42:22.653
I'm back! I'm...

01:42:39.295 --> 01:42:40.504
Lotte.

01:43:12.662 --> 01:43:13.871
Ooh!

01:43:17.709 --> 01:43:20.210
Hello. Hello, young lady.
We're...

01:43:21.504 --> 01:43:23.338
Malk...

01:43:23.423 --> 01:43:25.757
We're Malkovich.

01:43:26.885 --> 01:43:28.760
Hey! Hey!

01:43:28.845 --> 01:43:31.054
Maxine! I did it, Maxine!

01:43:31.389 --> 01:43:33.307
I left Malkovich for you,
sweetie!

01:43:33.391 --> 01:43:35.601
It's no good being Malkovich
without you.

01:43:35.685 --> 01:43:36.977
It proves I love you!

01:43:37.061 --> 01:43:38.270
- Fuck off, Craig!
- Doesn't it?

01:43:38.354 --> 01:43:40.522
He's not with us.

01:43:50.033 --> 01:43:52.493
Maxine, I love you!

01:43:52.994 --> 01:43:54.661
I'm gonna go right back
into Malkovich

01:43:54.746 --> 01:43:56.038
and I'm gonna kick Lester out!

01:43:56.122 --> 01:43:57.831
And then you'll love me again!

01:43:57.916 --> 01:44:00.584
Maxine! Maxine!

01:44:14.807 --> 01:44:16.266
Ma-Sheen.

01:44:16.351 --> 01:44:20.020
Hey. Malcatraz.
Uh, how are you?

01:44:20.104 --> 01:44:22.439
- I'm very well. And you?
- Good, good.

01:44:22.524 --> 01:44:23.857
- You look well.
- Thank you.

01:44:23.942 --> 01:44:26.568
- How's Celeste?
- She's good, yeah.

01:44:26.653 --> 01:44:28.862
She's sorry she couldn't make it today.
She had to go to the store.

01:44:28.947 --> 01:44:30.280
Oh, that's okay.

01:44:30.365 --> 01:44:31.532
Charlie, hi!

01:44:31.616 --> 01:44:32.991
I didn't even hear the door.

01:44:33.076 --> 01:44:34.826
Lookin' great, Flo.

01:44:34.911 --> 01:44:37.037
I'm looking grateful?

01:44:39.165 --> 01:44:42.042
Charlie, we are not
getting any younger.

01:44:42.502 --> 01:44:44.461
Well, don't rub it in.

01:44:44.796 --> 01:44:47.464
Listen, Charlie, I know this
is going to sound crazy,

01:44:47.549 --> 01:44:50.050
but what would you think
if I told you

01:44:50.134 --> 01:44:54.304
that I'd found a way for us
to live forever? All of us.

01:44:55.682 --> 01:44:57.307
Johnny boy,
what are you talking about?

01:44:57.392 --> 01:45:01.311
All of us. Celeste, Floris, you, me.
Gary Sinise maybe.

01:45:04.023 --> 01:45:06.275
I don't really understand.

01:45:13.283 --> 01:45:16.994
Charlie, this is Emily.

01:45:27.255 --> 01:45:29.006
Isn't she lovely?

01:45:30.675 --> 01:45:32.801
- Hey, pass the Cheetos.
- You need more puffs?

01:45:32.885 --> 01:45:34.177
No, I want more.

01:45:34.262 --> 01:45:36.221
Okeydoke.
They're covered in grease.

01:45:36.306 --> 01:45:37.347
Shut up.

01:45:37.432 --> 01:45:39.182
Can I swim yet?

01:45:39.350 --> 01:45:41.977
- Can you swim yet?
- What time is it?

01:45:42.353 --> 01:45:43.770
Shall we do the cramp test?

01:45:43.855 --> 01:45:45.397
Check her.

01:45:46.899 --> 01:45:49.568
Let me see. Are you gonna throw up?
Let me see!

01:45:50.278 --> 01:45:53.030
Are you gonna throw up?
Are you gonna vomit?

01:45:53.573 --> 01:45:55.616
Okay, you can swim.

01:45:59.537 --> 01:46:01.288
Maxine.

01:46:02.123 --> 01:46:03.582
Maxine.

01:46:04.709 --> 01:46:06.585
I love you, Maxine.

01:46:08.546 --> 01:46:10.380
Oh, look away.

01:46:11.049 --> 01:46:12.883
Look away.

01:46:13.217 --> 01:46:16.261
Look away. Look away.

01:46:16.429 --> 01:46:19.222
Look away. Look away.

01:46:19.807 --> 01:46:21.350
Look away.

01:46:21.374 --> 01:46:41.374
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