WEBVTT 00:00:00.703 --> 00:00:20.703 ..:: Presented By ZarFilm Website ::.. .:: www.bolboljan.net ::. 00:00:23.727 --> 00:00:27.127 You know, you ever heard someone say that old expression, 00:00:27.227 --> 00:00:31.827 "Everything happens for a reason"? Well, I don't think that applies to me. 00:00:32.527 --> 00:00:34.627 I mean, I spend every morning rushing to work 00:00:34.727 --> 00:00:38.527 trying to catch the same subway to the same lousy job. 00:00:38.627 --> 00:00:39.927 What's the reason for that? 00:00:40.027 --> 00:00:44.427 See, I'm a researcher for one of the biggest publishing houses in Chicago, 00:00:44.527 --> 00:00:46.527 but where I really belong is in Creative. 00:00:46.527 --> 00:00:51.127 The problem is, is my boss doesn't know it yet, so I'm totally frustrated. 00:00:51.227 --> 00:00:53.127 While my friend Paul keeps telling me, 00:00:53.227 --> 00:00:56.427 "You gotta be optimistic. You gotta be positive. " 00:00:56.527 --> 00:00:58.027 OK. OK. You know what? 00:00:58.127 --> 00:01:01.527 Today is gonna be my lucky day. Today is gonna be my... 00:01:01.627 --> 00:01:04.827 - Aah! - Oh! Wow! 00:01:04.927 --> 00:01:07.927 - Hey, look at that, It's your lucky day, - Did you just see that? 00:01:07.927 --> 00:01:08.927 Oh, I've seen it a million times, 00:01:09.027 --> 00:01:10.427 - You want it? - No, 00:01:10.427 --> 00:01:13.027 I don't want it, Go ahead, You got a new briefcase, 00:01:13.127 --> 00:01:15.027 Yeah, maybe its got a name on it or something, 00:01:15.127 --> 00:01:17.527 - Oh, come... What are you, nuts? - What? 00:01:17.627 --> 00:01:19.127 - You're gonna return it? - Yeah, 00:01:19.227 --> 00:01:21.427 Did you not just say you needed a new one? 00:01:21.527 --> 00:01:22.927 Yeah, when I get my raise, 00:01:22.927 --> 00:01:24.927 Haven't you been working there for, like, a year? 00:01:25.027 --> 00:01:27.427 I bet Taylor doesn't even know you work there, I'd be pissed, 00:01:27.527 --> 00:01:31.727 - Are you pissed? I'd be pissed, - Yeah, I'm-I'm a little pissed, 00:01:31.827 --> 00:01:35.127 You know, come to think of it, I've never really seen you angry before, 00:01:35.127 --> 00:01:36.727 Henderson, you ever seen Tom really angry? 00:01:36.827 --> 00:01:39.427 - No, - All right, fine, So I don't get angry, 00:01:39.527 --> 00:01:41.227 What is that, a bad thing? 00:01:41.327 --> 00:01:44.927 It's, you know, you keep it bottled up and then sooner or later, 00:01:44.927 --> 00:01:48.027 you come into work and you mow everyone down with one of those... 00:01:48.127 --> 00:01:51.227 - AK-47, - AK-47, You know, just to impress, uh... 00:01:51.327 --> 00:01:53.127 - Jodie Foster, - Jodie Foster, 00:01:53.227 --> 00:01:56.427 (chuckles)) All right, I'll do it on your day off, all right? 00:01:56.427 --> 00:02:01.027 (Paul) Touché, There she is, It's your Jodie Foster, 00:02:01.127 --> 00:02:02.127 Paul, come on, man, 00:02:02.227 --> 00:02:03.527 How you ever gonna get to know her if you just sit there? 00:02:03.627 --> 00:02:05.527 It's Taylor's daughter, man, I can't just... 00:02:05.627 --> 00:02:10.027 You can't just what? Huh? Are you gonna be a loser your whole life? Hmm? 00:02:10.127 --> 00:02:13.527 Just go over there and talk to her, Go, Go, 00:02:13.527 --> 00:02:16.427 - OK, fine, I'm going, I'm going, - You're going, 00:02:34.027 --> 00:02:35.427 Excuse me, 00:02:35.527 --> 00:02:37.027 Aah! 00:02:37.127 --> 00:02:39.127 (baby crying)) 00:02:41.227 --> 00:02:42.527 (mouthing)) 00:02:46.527 --> 00:02:48.227 Hi, I'm-- 00:02:50.327 --> 00:02:51.527 Ah... 00:02:53.127 --> 00:02:55.027 I-- Oh! 00:02:56.027 --> 00:02:59.027 Uh... I-- He wa-- 00:03:00.227 --> 00:03:01.827 Oh, 00:03:05.927 --> 00:03:07.927 (dog growling)) 00:03:08.027 --> 00:03:09.027 Oh! Uh... 00:03:09.027 --> 00:03:11.527 - What are you doing to my dog? - Ma'am... 00:03:11.627 --> 00:03:14.427 - Who's taunting my dog? - No one's taunting your dog, He-- 00:03:14.527 --> 00:03:16.227 Oh! Uh... 00:03:16.327 --> 00:03:18.427 Um, the-the d-- Um... 00:03:19.327 --> 00:03:22.527 Here, why don't you take my seat? Here, 00:03:25.027 --> 00:03:26.627 Great, Now, that's great, 00:03:26.727 --> 00:03:28.327 Two more minutes, and I'm gonna be closer than you are, 00:03:28.327 --> 00:03:30.027 Look, Opening, Go, 00:03:30.027 --> 00:03:32.127 Just go, 00:03:32.227 --> 00:03:34.427 Go, Go, 00:03:35.827 --> 00:03:37.327 It's OK, Go, just go, 00:03:40.427 --> 00:03:44.327 (conductor) Lake Street. Lake Street is next. 00:03:46.527 --> 00:03:49.627 You're Tom Stansfield, right? From Research? 00:03:49.727 --> 00:03:53.627 Yeah, Yeah, Tom, Tom Stansfield, 00:03:58.527 --> 00:04:01.927 Stansfield from Research, 00:04:05.027 --> 00:04:06.527 It's a growing sport, you know? 00:04:06.527 --> 00:04:09.027 Paul, there is no way that she thought that it was a wrestling magazine, 00:04:09.127 --> 00:04:11.627 Oh, come on, Get over it, OK? 00:04:11.727 --> 00:04:13.927 You're a little embarrassed, It happens, OK? 00:04:14.027 --> 00:04:15.627 Let me tell you something, If I had a dime for every time 00:04:15.727 --> 00:04:17.527 a gay naked magazine fell out of my... I'm kidding, I'm kidding, 00:04:17.627 --> 00:04:18.627 What? Paul! 00:04:18.727 --> 00:04:20.427 No, But seriously, so you're a little humiliated, 00:04:20.527 --> 00:04:23.527 At least now we've established that she knows who you are, right? 00:04:23.627 --> 00:04:25.627 - I'm gonna have to leave the company, - No, you're not, 00:04:25.627 --> 00:04:26.927 Oh, God, There she is, 00:04:27.027 --> 00:04:29.127 Oh, and I need to see the proofs on Thailand immediately, 00:04:29.127 --> 00:04:31.327 All right, What else have we got? 00:04:36.827 --> 00:04:39.727 - Are you Tom? - Yes, 00:04:39.827 --> 00:04:43.927 - Mr, Taylor wants to see you, - Oh... OK, 00:04:44.527 --> 00:04:45.527 OK, 00:04:45.627 --> 00:04:49.127 OK, you see? This is your chance, This is fate, This is what I'm talking about, 00:04:49.227 --> 00:04:52.227 It's about that new opening in Creative and you're the man for the job, 00:04:52.327 --> 00:04:54.627 You're gonna go in there and you're gonna pitch him those book ideas, 00:04:54.727 --> 00:04:56.527 No, I just... I'm really not ready, 00:04:56.627 --> 00:04:58.827 Let's get to business, Now we're steppin' up, OK, 00:04:58.927 --> 00:05:00.627 Come on, You're gonna go in there, you're gonna pitch him an inside curve... 00:05:00.727 --> 00:05:02.127 Wait, wait, Where is my blue folder? 00:05:02.127 --> 00:05:04.327 You don't need it, Enough with the excuses already, Come here, 00:05:04.427 --> 00:05:06.927 - You look good, You feel good? - I feel like I'm gonna throw up, 00:05:07.027 --> 00:05:08.827 Well, that's good, I want you to use that, OK? 00:05:08.927 --> 00:05:11.027 What is this? This dad's? It's nice, Now get in there, OK? 00:05:11.127 --> 00:05:13.927 - Don't-don't touch my ass, - What? It was a light spank, It was light, 00:05:17.227 --> 00:05:18.427 - Hey, - Hey, 00:05:18.427 --> 00:05:21.027 - Uh, do I just go in there? - Um, no, He's not finished yet, 00:05:21.127 --> 00:05:23.427 - but you can have a seat over there, - Oh, OK, 00:05:23.527 --> 00:05:26.127 Let me explain something to you, Henderson, 00:05:26.227 --> 00:05:31.627 I did not dislike your ideas, I found them loathsome, 00:05:33.527 --> 00:05:36.127 I hated them, 00:05:36.227 --> 00:05:38.827 - You're dismissed, - From your office? 00:05:38.827 --> 00:05:40.927 Nice try, 00:05:44.227 --> 00:05:47.727 - Good luck, You're gonna need it... - He's ready to see you, 00:05:47.827 --> 00:05:49.127 You can come in, 00:05:49.227 --> 00:05:52.127 You know what? We should have never let up after the Revolution! 00:05:52.127 --> 00:05:54.627 Sit down, Sit down, Coffee? 00:05:54.627 --> 00:05:58.727 We shouldn't have left you at toehold, We should have driven you to the sea! 00:06:01.127 --> 00:06:05.027 Now... what's this I hear about you making threats 00:06:05.127 --> 00:06:08.227 to spray this place with an AK-47? 00:06:08.227 --> 00:06:10.227 What? 00:06:11.227 --> 00:06:16.427 Oh, oh, oh, No, That... I was just making a joke, 00:06:16.527 --> 00:06:19.627 Oh, that's funny to you? Killing everyone in this office? 00:06:19.727 --> 00:06:26.427 No, No, No, no, no, no, The... Paul said how I never get angry... 00:06:26.527 --> 00:06:29.027 And what about you making fun of midgets? 00:06:29.127 --> 00:06:30.827 I never made fun of midgets, 00:06:30.827 --> 00:06:33.227 You said it'd be fun to date one 00:06:33.327 --> 00:06:35.327 because then you could rest your beer on her head, 00:06:35.427 --> 00:06:37.627 No, No, I never said anything like that, 00:06:37.727 --> 00:06:40.527 Apparently Henderson thinks you did, 00:06:40.627 --> 00:06:43.927 Now I've got a good sense of humor, but that's just plain sick, 00:06:43.927 --> 00:06:46.727 - But, sir, I didn't say... - Audrey? 00:06:48.027 --> 00:06:50.627 - Which file did I ask you for? - Uh, the Platt file? 00:06:50.727 --> 00:06:54.027 - John Platt, Not Sam Platt, - I'm sorry, I guess I didn't think that... 00:06:54.127 --> 00:06:55.927 That's right, You didn't think, 00:06:56.027 --> 00:06:59.027 Now if it's not too much trouble, if you could fetch me the right file... 00:06:59.127 --> 00:07:01.327 - OK, - And get Tom and me some doughnuts, 00:07:01.427 --> 00:07:02.827 OK, 00:07:02.827 --> 00:07:07.527 Now... I'm told you've been trying to schedule a meeting with me 00:07:07.627 --> 00:07:11.127 about some ideas, What are they? 00:07:11.127 --> 00:07:16.127 Oh, uh... yeah, I had-l had some ideas, 00:07:18.127 --> 00:07:21.327 - Something wrong with the coffee? - Uh, no, It's fine, 00:07:21.427 --> 00:07:23.927 - Why'd you make a face? - What? 00:07:23.927 --> 00:07:27.227 Oh, well... It's-it's a little bitter, but... 00:07:30.527 --> 00:07:33.727 - Jesus, Audrey, get in here! - Sir, really, it's f... It's not a problem, 00:07:33.727 --> 00:07:36.527 - I've burped up stuff better than this, - Sir, it's fine, 00:07:36.627 --> 00:07:39.627 - Is something wrong? - Taste Tom's coffee, 00:07:39.727 --> 00:07:42.127 No, really, It's OK, 00:07:43.827 --> 00:07:47.427 - How would you rate that? - Well, it's not that great, 00:07:47.427 --> 00:07:53.227 Not that great? I guess so, Tom thinks it's shit, 00:07:53.327 --> 00:07:56.427 Audrey, are you retarded? 00:07:56.427 --> 00:07:59.727 It's not a rhetorical question, Are you retarded? 00:07:59.827 --> 00:08:00.827 No, I'm not retarded, 00:08:00.927 --> 00:08:05.327 Because a retarded person can make a cup of coffee, Am I right, Tom? 00:08:05.427 --> 00:08:07.727 Oh, I... I don't-I don't really know much 00:08:07.827 --> 00:08:10.427 about the limitations of the handicapped, 00:08:10.427 --> 00:08:15.727 I know of an employment agency that hires out retarded people for $4 an hour, 00:08:15.827 --> 00:08:20.427 So, if making a cup of coffee is too difficult a task for you, Miss Bennett, 00:08:20.527 --> 00:08:23.527 perhaps you'd be good enough to let me know, and I'll contact this agency 00:08:23.627 --> 00:08:27.127 and give a retarded person a job, 00:08:28.727 --> 00:08:30.727 (mouths)) Wow, 00:08:32.627 --> 00:08:36.827 - I wasn't too rough on her, was l? - Well, she is new and all, 00:08:36.927 --> 00:08:40.227 Maybe I was out of line, But do you understand what I'm dealing with? 00:08:40.327 --> 00:08:44.027 I mean, here I am trying to fill a position in Creative, 00:08:44.027 --> 00:08:48.827 and I can't seem to find one person responsible enough to earn my trust, 00:08:48.827 --> 00:08:52.227 I sometimes wonder if anyone here even knows what they're doing, 00:08:52.327 --> 00:08:54.027 I can understand how you could see it that way, sir, but... 00:08:54.127 --> 00:08:56.927 So you don't think I was out of line? 00:08:58.727 --> 00:09:02.927 Well, if what you're saying is that a company 00:09:03.027 --> 00:09:05.927 is only as strong as its weakest link, that makes sense, but... 00:09:06.027 --> 00:09:08.227 Exactly, That's exactly right, 00:09:08.327 --> 00:09:10.727 A company is only as strong as its weakest link, 00:09:10.827 --> 00:09:12.727 - Yeah... - Audrey, get in here! 00:09:12.827 --> 00:09:14.727 You were right, Tom, I was too soft on her, 00:09:14.827 --> 00:09:16.027 - What? No, - Yeah? 00:09:16.027 --> 00:09:18.027 Audrey, after talking it over with Tom here, 00:09:18.027 --> 00:09:21.127 I've come to realize that I'm gonna have to let you go, 00:09:21.127 --> 00:09:23.927 - You're firing me?! - I'm sorry, It's just not working out, 00:09:24.027 --> 00:09:25.927 - But, sir, I was suggesting... - I take my job very seriously, 00:09:26.027 --> 00:09:28.227 A chain is only as strong as its weakest link, 00:09:28.327 --> 00:09:31.427 - Right, but there's a whole other side, - Thanks for the support, 00:09:31.527 --> 00:09:33.727 Audrey, empty out your desk by the end of the day, 00:09:33.727 --> 00:09:35.827 - Fine, - Sir, this... I... 00:09:35.927 --> 00:09:37.527 Thanks for straightening me out there, Tom, 00:09:37.627 --> 00:09:40.027 Right, right, But I didn't get to say what I wanted to say, 00:09:40.027 --> 00:09:44.727 Oh, your ideas, of course, Schedule an appointment with my new secretary, 00:09:51.827 --> 00:09:55.127 Tom, Are you OK? 00:09:55.127 --> 00:09:58.027 Uh... yeah, sure, 00:09:58.127 --> 00:10:00.027 I'm guessing by the way you look he's on another one 00:10:00.127 --> 00:10:01.427 of his rampages this morning, 00:10:01.427 --> 00:10:03.727 - Definitely, - Damn, 00:10:03.727 --> 00:10:05.227 I was hoping to catch him in a good mood, 00:10:05.227 --> 00:10:09.427 Yeah, that's, um... that's probably not gonna happen, 00:10:09.427 --> 00:10:12.127 I'm supposed to go to this party tonight, but my dad's making me housesit 00:10:12.227 --> 00:10:14.227 for his stupid bird while he's away this weekend, 00:10:14.327 --> 00:10:16.927 Well, why don't you go in there and tell him you're not gonna do it? 00:10:17.027 --> 00:10:18.727 I can't just... 00:10:18.827 --> 00:10:22.027 You can't just what? I mean, live your own life and have a free weekend? 00:10:22.127 --> 00:10:25.027 No, it's not that, 00:10:26.427 --> 00:10:29.027 - Wait, it is that, - Yeah, 00:10:29.027 --> 00:10:32.827 - I should just go to that party, - Yeah, of course, 00:10:33.527 --> 00:10:38.427 Well, um... OK, I'm gonna go back to, uh, work, 00:10:38.527 --> 00:10:40.627 OK, sure, 00:10:40.727 --> 00:10:44.427 Tom? I know this might seem a little out of place 00:10:44.427 --> 00:10:46.427 because we barely even know each other, 00:10:46.427 --> 00:10:49.127 But, do you have any plans tonight? 00:10:50.627 --> 00:10:51.827 (mouths)) No, no, no, 00:10:51.827 --> 00:10:56.327 - Uh... no, I'm-I'm wide open, - We won't be home too late, 00:10:56.327 --> 00:10:57.627 Hey, it's no problem, 00:10:57.627 --> 00:11:00.727 So the party starts at 7, You could be at my dad's house by 6? 00:11:00.827 --> 00:11:02.527 - Sure, - You sure you're cool with this? 00:11:02.527 --> 00:11:05.727 - Are you kidding me? - Tom, you're such a sweetheart, 00:11:05.827 --> 00:11:09.627 Thank you so much, I'm gonna love you forever for this, 00:11:10.827 --> 00:11:14.627 - All right, Yeah, who's the man now? - See? What'd I tell you? 00:11:14.627 --> 00:11:18.527 (chuckles)) I'm a lady-killer, 00:11:22.327 --> 00:11:24.927 How the hell could he be so excited about housesitting? 00:11:25.027 --> 00:11:29.227 He's nice, Daddy, That's how, Most guys wouldn't even offer to do that, 00:11:29.327 --> 00:11:31.927 I don't know if I want him around my bird, 00:11:31.927 --> 00:11:36.027 Oh, Dad, will you just relax? It's gonna be fine, I promise, OK? 00:11:36.127 --> 00:11:39.827 I'll check in as soon as I get there, 8:00, 00:11:40.427 --> 00:11:43.227 If I sense anything's wrong, you're coming back here, 00:11:43.327 --> 00:11:45.327 OK, OK, 00:11:55.227 --> 00:11:58.227 (. light rock) 00:12:32.927 --> 00:12:35.127 Very good, Right on time, 00:12:35.227 --> 00:12:40.127 Oh, sir, Uh... Hey, is that a bear trap? 00:12:40.227 --> 00:12:44.527 Yes, It's to keep the neighbor's kids out of my yard, 00:12:51.527 --> 00:12:56.527 Sir, I just wanted to let you know how much I appreciate you... 00:12:56.627 --> 00:12:59.227 well... letting tonight happen, 00:12:59.227 --> 00:13:04.927 I mean, I know it means a lot to Lisa, and I think you're doing the right thing, 00:13:05.627 --> 00:13:07.427 I don't know what you're planning, Stansfield, 00:13:07.527 --> 00:13:11.027 but you're attitude is making me very nervous, 00:13:12.827 --> 00:13:16.227 - Those socks are clean, right? - Um... 00:13:16.327 --> 00:13:21.327 - You hesitated, Put those on, - Are you serious? 00:13:31.327 --> 00:13:34.227 If you want to watch TV, the remote's there, 00:13:34.327 --> 00:13:37.327 That panel controls the lights, alarm, skylight, etc, 00:13:37.427 --> 00:13:39.027 Yeah, I probably won't use any of that stuff, 00:13:39.127 --> 00:13:42.327 - You know, since the party starts at 7, - Party? 00:13:42.427 --> 00:13:46.127 I made it clear to Lisa you're not to have any guests in here, 00:13:46.127 --> 00:13:49.527 You're the only one allowed in the house, 00:13:50.327 --> 00:13:55.427 - What? Lisa's not here? - No, Of course not, 00:13:56.327 --> 00:13:59.527 Lisa's at the party... 00:14:00.627 --> 00:14:03.327 and I'm staying here, 00:14:03.427 --> 00:14:07.427 Is this concept too complicated for you, Stansfield? 00:14:09.827 --> 00:14:12.727 Don't touch the furniture, 00:14:15.927 --> 00:14:18.927 And this is my bird's room, 00:14:18.927 --> 00:14:22.327 (chuckles)) He's got his own room? 00:14:24.527 --> 00:14:27.027 That's cool, 00:14:29.727 --> 00:14:33.227 - (gasps)) - How's my little boy? 00:14:33.327 --> 00:14:38.427 - This is OJ, - OJ? Like the murderer? 00:14:38.527 --> 00:14:43.527 No, Like the football player, OJ Simpson, 00:14:43.527 --> 00:14:46.827 I've set the alarm, When you hear it go off, feed him, 00:14:46.827 --> 00:14:50.727 - (mice squeaking)) - Aw, What do I feed these little guys? 00:14:50.727 --> 00:14:56.827 They don't get fed, They are the food, His diet varies, but they're his favorites, 00:14:56.927 --> 00:14:59.527 Hey, don't you have to shut these doors? 00:14:59.527 --> 00:15:03.227 Not anymore, He's been depressed since his mate died, 00:15:03.227 --> 00:15:07.327 He won't fly, Just sits in his cage, 00:15:10.027 --> 00:15:15.027 Medication, Give him two of these at 1 0:00, 00:15:15.127 --> 00:15:17.227 I have to shove these down his throat? 00:15:17.327 --> 00:15:20.927 Just one, The other is inserted into his rectum, 00:15:21.027 --> 00:15:23.027 Don't worry, It's not too unpleasant for him, 00:15:23.027 --> 00:15:28.327 - He doesn't bite, does he? - No, Not unless you taunt him, 00:15:28.427 --> 00:15:29.827 You're not planning on taunting him, are you, Tom? 00:15:29.927 --> 00:15:31.427 - No, - I mean, that'd be really sick, 00:15:31.427 --> 00:15:33.827 No, of course not, 00:15:35.127 --> 00:15:38.027 And the most important thing, make sure he gets a pint of water, 00:15:38.127 --> 00:15:40.427 The medication tends to dry him out and then he can't breathe, 00:15:40.527 --> 00:15:42.727 - OK, - Well, I must be off, 00:15:42.827 --> 00:15:45.927 - Henderson should be waiting outside, - Henderson? I thought you fired him, 00:15:45.927 --> 00:15:48.027 Because his ideas were stupid? Of course not, 00:15:48.127 --> 00:15:50.027 He's gonna drive me to the train station, 00:15:50.127 --> 00:15:53.727 So, you can leave as soon as Lisa and Hans get back, 00:15:53.727 --> 00:15:56.127 - Hans? - Lisa's boyfriend, 00:15:57.027 --> 00:16:01.327 So remember, uh... water in the bowl, medication, and... 00:16:01.327 --> 00:16:05.527 anything happens to this house while I'm gone, I'll kill you, 00:16:07.727 --> 00:16:09.727 (door shuts)) 00:16:09.827 --> 00:16:12.227 (Paul over phone)) You're housesitting? You gotta be kidding me. 00:16:12.327 --> 00:16:13.427 (Tom)) I know, it sucks, 00:16:13.427 --> 00:16:16.427 What are you talking about? Don't you see? This is a test. 00:16:16.427 --> 00:16:18.827 You watch Taylor's house, come up with a couple of great ideas 00:16:18.927 --> 00:16:20.827 and if everything goes smooth, you get the promotion. 00:16:20.927 --> 00:16:23.927 - You think so? - Of course I do. What could be easier? 00:16:24.027 --> 00:16:25.827 (crackles)) 00:16:25.827 --> 00:16:28.927 (. "Not What I Wanted" by Evan Olson)) 00:16:40.427 --> 00:16:43.827 (Lisa giggling)) What are you doing, Hans? Come here. 00:16:43.827 --> 00:16:48.427 Baby, you're gonna burn so bad if you don't let me put this on you right now. 00:16:52.427 --> 00:16:58.227 Oh, my God. You scared me, Hans. You're insane. Put that down. 00:16:59.327 --> 00:17:03.527 Want to put some on me? Put some lotion on me. 00:17:10.227 --> 00:17:14.027 - Is Jack around? - Hey... what? Who are you? 00:17:14.127 --> 00:17:18.127 It's OK, I'm Red Taylor, I'm Jack's son, I let myself in the back, 00:17:18.227 --> 00:17:20.227 - Oh, Hey, Tom Stansfield, - Hey, 00:17:20.327 --> 00:17:23.827 Tom, nice to meet you, Am I interrupting something here? 00:17:23.927 --> 00:17:29.127 Oh, no, Uh... I was... uh... Oh, your shoes, 00:17:29.227 --> 00:17:33.427 Nike, Uh, listen, Tom, can you do me a favor? I lost my TV Guide. 00:17:33.527 --> 00:17:37.527 I came over here to see if maybe my dad's got a copy of one, 00:17:37.627 --> 00:17:40.127 You haven't seen a copy of the guide laying around, have you? 00:17:40.127 --> 00:17:42.927 - My sister in? - No, actually she's out for the evening, 00:17:42.927 --> 00:17:46.527 - Bingo, (chuckles)) - Oh, 00:17:46.627 --> 00:17:50.327 So, uh, you're here to... 00:17:51.227 --> 00:17:53.227 - Housesit, - Oh, 00:17:54.127 --> 00:17:58.927 Yeah, it's probably for the best if you don't, uh, tell Lisa that I stopped by, 00:17:58.927 --> 00:18:03.127 - Why? Is there a problem? - Well, you know how uptight she is, 00:18:03.227 --> 00:18:06.227 - Really? - I'm more the free spirit of the family, 00:18:07.227 --> 00:18:12.027 Oh, Oh, boy, See that right there? 00:18:12.027 --> 00:18:15.127 - Kirstie Alley? - Yeah, I dated her maid, 00:18:16.427 --> 00:18:19.227 - Really? - I boned Kirstie Alley's maid, 00:18:19.327 --> 00:18:22.127 And this is while they were making Look Who's Talking , 00:18:22.227 --> 00:18:24.027 Wow, that's really something, 00:18:24.127 --> 00:18:26.927 I'll tell you another thing, You know Michelle Pfeiffer? 00:18:27.027 --> 00:18:28.027 Yeah, 00:18:28.127 --> 00:18:31.127 I did the deed with Michelle Pfeiffer's cousin, 00:18:31.127 --> 00:18:33.227 - Wow, - Right out there in those bushes, 00:18:33.227 --> 00:18:35.627 - Right, - Ah, she looked just like Michelle, too, 00:18:35.627 --> 00:18:37.727 except she was brunette instead of blond, 00:18:37.727 --> 00:18:40.227 and she was kinda short and dumpy, 00:18:40.227 --> 00:18:43.827 Well, uh, ya certainly have an interesting life, Fred, 00:18:43.927 --> 00:18:46.027 You married, Tom? 00:18:46.127 --> 00:18:48.727 - No, I'm single, - No girlfriend? 00:18:48.827 --> 00:18:52.727 No, and, no, actually I had a girlfriend, but we, uh, broke up, 00:18:52.827 --> 00:18:54.127 - Ah, - Ah, 00:18:54.227 --> 00:18:58.327 Listen, I really gotta get back to work, and since you got your TV Guide and... 00:18:58.327 --> 00:19:02.827 So, you broke up, huh? That's too bad, 00:19:02.927 --> 00:19:04.627 - Was your ex a looker? - Yeah, 00:19:04.627 --> 00:19:06.827 Yeah, in my opinion she was, 00:19:06.927 --> 00:19:11.327 I bet you you still keep a picture of her in your wallet, 00:19:11.427 --> 00:19:14.027 - Yeah, I do, - Can I see it? 00:19:14.127 --> 00:19:15.727 - Yeah, I suppose, - OK, 00:19:15.827 --> 00:19:18.627 Let me find her in here, There she is, 00:19:18.727 --> 00:19:22.627 (laughing)) Oh! Tom, you lucky man! 00:19:22.627 --> 00:19:25.927 - Yeah, - Oh, she is a real piece of ass! 00:19:26.027 --> 00:19:29.427 Oh, I could knock on that back door all day long! 00:19:29.527 --> 00:19:32.027 - Yeah? Sh-she's a pretty girl, - Wow, 00:19:32.027 --> 00:19:35.027 She has gotta be wicked in bed, Tell me she's wicked in bed, Tom, 00:19:35.127 --> 00:19:37.327 I bet you she banged your johnson raw every single night, 00:19:37.327 --> 00:19:39.127 - OK... - ...'cause that is one fine-looking broad, 00:19:39.227 --> 00:19:40.827 All right, Hey! Would ya-- 00:19:40.927 --> 00:19:44.327 I me-- You're talking about my girlfriend, 00:19:44.427 --> 00:19:47.927 - Ex-girlfriend, you said, - Yeah, but still, it's... 00:19:47.927 --> 00:19:51.427 Come on, I'm just making conversation, You know, guy-talk, 00:19:51.527 --> 00:19:54.127 Look, I just... I don't tell comfortable 00:19:54.227 --> 00:19:57.927 talking about my intimate relationships with a complete stranger, 00:19:58.027 --> 00:20:00.127 Understood, 00:20:00.227 --> 00:20:03.527 Well, you know, given how uptight you are talking about sex, 00:20:03.527 --> 00:20:05.327 you pretty much answered the question, 00:20:05.327 --> 00:20:07.727 I am not uptight! OK? 00:20:07.827 --> 00:20:11.027 Just because I don't feel like revealing personal details 00:20:11.027 --> 00:20:14.927 about my ex-girlfriend's sexual habits does not make me uptight, 00:20:15.027 --> 00:20:17.527 I didn't ask you anything personal, 00:20:17.627 --> 00:20:20.527 Well, then, what the hell do you consider personal? 00:20:20.627 --> 00:20:24.227 Well, it'd be like, you know, if I asked you how big your rod was, 00:20:24.327 --> 00:20:26.927 Then I would be out of line, 1 00%%%, 00:20:26.927 --> 00:20:31.627 No, no! That is no worse than asking me if my girlfriend's a nymph, 00:20:31.727 --> 00:20:34.427 I just asked you if she dug sex, 00:20:34.527 --> 00:20:36.927 Besides, I wouldn't have asked if I'd known she was frigid, 00:20:36.927 --> 00:20:39.527 Yeah, well, she is not frigid! 00:20:39.627 --> 00:20:41.527 Are you leaving? 00:20:41.627 --> 00:20:43.027 Oh, yeah, 00:20:43.127 --> 00:20:45.227 And listen, Could you do me a favor? 00:20:45.327 --> 00:20:46.827 - It's no big deal, - What? 00:20:46.927 --> 00:20:50.527 A business associate of my dad's is gonna come by to pick this up, 00:20:50.527 --> 00:20:55.727 - It's frozen steaks, it's a gift, - It's not cold, 00:20:57.227 --> 00:21:00.427 Dad says that's the way the guy likes 'em, What are you gonna do? 00:21:00.527 --> 00:21:02.327 Will you give it to him? 00:21:02.427 --> 00:21:04.527 (doorbell) 00:21:04.627 --> 00:21:06.627 Just one second, 00:21:07.227 --> 00:21:09.627 (doorbell) 00:21:13.327 --> 00:21:14.727 - Audrey, - Tom, 00:21:14.727 --> 00:21:16.227 (man)) Let's go! Come on! 00:21:16.227 --> 00:21:19.327 Oh, I guess this makes sense, He's got you living with him now? 00:21:19.427 --> 00:21:21.727 - Uh, no, I'm just watching his place, - (car horn)) 00:21:21.727 --> 00:21:24.527 - He's... Jack's out of town, - He is? 00:21:24.627 --> 00:21:27.327 - Yeah, - Aw, shoot! 00:21:27.427 --> 00:21:29.827 I came by 'cause I was hoping to get my job back, 00:21:29.927 --> 00:21:31.527 You know, the one that you got me canned from 00:21:31.627 --> 00:21:33.227 'cause I made a bad cup of coffee? Remember that? 00:21:33.327 --> 00:21:34.527 Listen, I'm really sorry about that, 00:21:34.627 --> 00:21:36.927 How can you fire someone for making a bad cup of coffee, huh? 00:21:37.027 --> 00:21:38.327 I know, That's what I tried to say to him, 00:21:38.327 --> 00:21:41.727 I mean, who do you think you are - Juan fucking Valdez? 00:21:41.827 --> 00:21:42.027 I might have had a future at that place if you'd just give me half a chance, 00:21:45.127 --> 00:21:49.027 - (man)) Let's get a move on, saddlebag! - Oh, my God, That's my idiot boyfriend, 00:21:49.127 --> 00:21:53.027 - (car horn)) - Hold your pants, you freakin' psycho! 00:21:53.127 --> 00:21:55.527 God, He drives me crazy, 00:21:55.627 --> 00:21:58.827 Oh, hey, you know, since you're on the rug, would you mind putting these on? 00:21:58.927 --> 00:22:02.927 - They're medical... I got 'em on, too, - Ugh! Licorice, 00:22:02.927 --> 00:22:06.327 I hate licorice, I need water or I'm gonna throw up, Ugh! 00:22:06.327 --> 00:22:10.327 Thanks to you, I lost my second job inside a month and now I'm flat broke, 00:22:10.427 --> 00:22:11.727 You lost another job? 00:22:11.827 --> 00:22:14.527 Yeah, I got fired from my waitress job just last Friday, 00:22:14.627 --> 00:22:17.327 - Why did they fire you? - Oh, I don't know, 00:22:17.327 --> 00:22:19.927 One of the assistant managers caught me making out with a customer, 00:22:20.027 --> 00:22:21.627 - Excuse me? - Well, I mean, actually the customer 00:22:21.727 --> 00:22:23.127 was my boyfriend, 00:22:23.227 --> 00:22:25.627 I mean, he became my boyfriend after the incident anyway, 00:22:25.727 --> 00:22:28.527 - You got any beer in here? - Uh... Hey, 00:22:28.627 --> 00:22:31.027 - Here we go, - Would you mind putting these on? 00:22:31.127 --> 00:22:34.327 It's a house rule, Oh, actually, that's a twist... Aah! 00:22:34.327 --> 00:22:39.127 That's the counter, Listen, Jack, is just a real stickler, That'd be great, 00:22:39.227 --> 00:22:41.627 No kidding, I found that out this morning, 00:22:41.727 --> 00:22:43.327 (man)) I swear I am gonna freak out and I'm gonna come in there... 00:22:43.427 --> 00:22:45.427 - Oh, man, Spike's in a real mood, - Uh... 00:22:45.527 --> 00:22:46.827 - Don't even... hey, - (doorbell) 00:22:46.827 --> 00:22:48.727 - Come on, come on, come on, Shit, - (Spike)) I swear to God, Audrey, 00:22:48.727 --> 00:22:51.527 I'll piss on this guy's front steps! Let's go! 00:22:51.527 --> 00:22:52.627 - (knocking)) - (doorbell) 00:22:52.727 --> 00:22:55.827 If you don't open this door this second, I'm gonna come in there and... 00:22:55.927 --> 00:22:56.927 - Hi, - (burps)) 00:22:57.027 --> 00:22:58.327 - (clatter) - Don't worry, Nothing broke, 00:22:58.327 --> 00:23:02.527 Hey, Baby, come on, What are you doing leaving me in the goddamn car? 00:23:02.527 --> 00:23:04.127 Shake that tail, baby, Come on, Let's get a move on, 00:23:04.227 --> 00:23:08.027 - Hold your horses, Try acting civilized, - Audrey! 00:23:08.027 --> 00:23:09.327 This is Tom, the guy that I was telling you about from the office, 00:23:09.427 --> 00:23:11.327 Oh, the coffee dude, 00:23:11.427 --> 00:23:14.227 You got some black ass karma headed your way, superfreak, 00:23:14.327 --> 00:23:17.227 Oh, we don't need no lecture from you, Mr, High and Mighty, 00:23:17.327 --> 00:23:20.527 Hey, shut that sass-trap of yours, little lady, before I bounce you off the wall! 00:23:20.627 --> 00:23:24.927 Look, I would appreciate it if you would take this outside, please, 00:23:25.027 --> 00:23:29.827 Hey, I'd appreciate it if you'd go and buy yourself a bagel, Jewy, 00:23:29.927 --> 00:23:32.627 Jewy? I'm not Jewish, And I don't think that making fun of the... 00:23:32.727 --> 00:23:36.027 - Don't pay attention to him, He's nuts, - I'm nuts? 00:23:36.027 --> 00:23:38.627 - Who do you think you are? - Look, can we please take this outside? 00:23:38.727 --> 00:23:40.127 Oh, come on, 00:23:40.227 --> 00:23:42.927 You know what you are? You're a filthy, little tramp, 00:23:42.927 --> 00:23:44.427 Me? What about you and that waitress? 00:23:44.527 --> 00:23:46.527 - Keep going, - I never touched her ever, 00:23:46.627 --> 00:23:48.527 - Swear? - So help me God, 00:23:48.627 --> 00:23:50.027 You swear on your mama's life? 00:23:50.127 --> 00:23:52.027 Hell, woman, I ain't gonna swear on my mama's life, 00:23:52.127 --> 00:23:54.927 - Why not? If you're telling the truth, - I think he's telling the truth, Audrey, 00:23:55.027 --> 00:23:56.427 Then why won't you swear on your mama's life? 00:23:56.427 --> 00:23:59.127 Well, because I don't feel like I have the right 00:23:59.227 --> 00:24:00.727 to gamble with my mama's life, that's why, 00:24:00.727 --> 00:24:03.127 Gamble? But apparently you got nothing to worry about 00:24:03.227 --> 00:24:04.927 unless you're lying like a hunk of morgue meat, 00:24:04.927 --> 00:24:09.427 Hey, I ain't gonna sit here and get called a liar by no skankin' whore! 00:24:09.427 --> 00:24:12.727 Who you calling a whore, you shrimp-dick bastard?! 00:24:12.827 --> 00:24:13.927 Audrey, see now you're just provoking him, 00:24:14.027 --> 00:24:15.427 That's a vicious, flat-out, bold-faced lie and you know it! 00:24:15.427 --> 00:24:18.727 - Is it? Is it? I don't think so! - I'll whip it out right now! 00:24:18.727 --> 00:24:20.027 - No, no, no, I don't wanna see it, - I'm gonna whip it out right now 00:24:20.127 --> 00:24:22.727 and prove to you that she's a lying slut! 00:24:22.827 --> 00:24:24.627 - Keep your meat in the fridge! - You wanna see my piece? 00:24:24.727 --> 00:24:27.027 - All right, All right! That is enough! - Go get me a ruler, Tom! You go get... 00:24:27.127 --> 00:24:30.627 That is it, I don't care if you have a tiny shrimp dick! 00:24:32.427 --> 00:24:36.827 - Or a giant whale dick, which that's... - Goddamn it, Audrey! 00:24:36.927 --> 00:24:39.827 You tell him you're a liar or I'm gonna smash your face in, I swear! 00:24:39.927 --> 00:24:45.027 - Wait a minute! You put that down! - All right, Can we please just use fists? 00:24:45.127 --> 00:24:48.027 - Come here, you little... (slap)) - You hit me, you bastard! 00:24:48.127 --> 00:24:50.627 - I did not and you know it! - He hit me! 00:24:50.727 --> 00:24:52.727 He hit me as sure as I'm standing right here! 00:24:52.827 --> 00:24:54.527 - Did you hit her, Spike? - Yes, 00:24:54.527 --> 00:24:56.427 With an open hand, It was with an open hand, 00:24:56.527 --> 00:24:57.827 - So what if it's open? - You can't... 00:24:57.927 --> 00:24:59.327 - Then it don't count, - Says who? 00:24:59.427 --> 00:25:02.327 Says anyone, Ask the Jew, 00:25:02.427 --> 00:25:04.827 All right, that's it, You two have got to leave, 00:25:04.827 --> 00:25:07.427 All right, that's fine, But she is not coming with me, 00:25:07.527 --> 00:25:08.827 You are not welcome in the double ride, 00:25:08.927 --> 00:25:12.327 Fine, I don't care, I don't need your lousy trailer, I'll stay right here with Tom, 00:25:12.327 --> 00:25:14.027 - Fine, Stay with Tom, - I'll stay right here, 00:25:14.127 --> 00:25:19.727 Wait a minute, Whoa, Guys, you need to try to work this thing out, 00:25:19.827 --> 00:25:23.527 - He hit me! He knocked me on my can! - I know, I know, 00:25:23.627 --> 00:25:28.227 Well, but it was with an open hand after all, and... 00:25:28.227 --> 00:25:31.827 Relationships have their ups and downs, you guys, 00:25:31.927 --> 00:25:33.727 and you don't want to ruin this great... 00:25:33.827 --> 00:25:36.827 (yelping)) 00:25:38.927 --> 00:25:42.227 Oh, God, The bird, OJ! 00:25:44.627 --> 00:25:46.627 Oh, my God, 00:25:49.027 --> 00:25:52.627 (continues yelping)) 00:25:52.727 --> 00:25:54.827 - (squeals)) - Oh, 00:25:56.327 --> 00:26:00.927 You come back here or Tom's gonna kick your butt! So take that! 00:26:01.027 --> 00:26:04.027 (revs engine)) Ooh, I'm shaking in my boots, baby! 00:26:04.127 --> 00:26:06.527 Look at those two, OJ, 00:26:06.627 --> 00:26:09.327 (phone ringing)) 00:26:09.427 --> 00:26:14.827 (Spike)) Oh, I ain't running away, dummy! 00:26:14.927 --> 00:26:17.127 - Hello? - (Lisa)) Hi, Tom. How are ya? 00:26:17.227 --> 00:26:21.027 - Hey, Lisa, I'm great, I'm great, - (squawks)) 00:26:21.927 --> 00:26:23.627 - Is that OJ? - Yeah, yeah. 00:26:23.727 --> 00:26:27.327 - We just had a little drink of water, - I haven't heard him squawk in years, 00:26:27.427 --> 00:26:31.527 Oh, yeah, He's quite the crazy bird, you know, 00:26:31.527 --> 00:26:34.027 Yeah. Anyway, Tom, I just wanted you to know 00:26:34.127 --> 00:26:37.227 how much I appreciate you helping me out tonight. 00:26:37.327 --> 00:26:40.627 But I'd like to crash at a friend's place tonight after the party, 00:26:40.627 --> 00:26:43.927 Would you think it was horrible if I asked you to stay the whole night tonight? 00:26:43.927 --> 00:26:49.427 Oh, well... I-I don't think your dad would want me staying here, 00:26:49.527 --> 00:26:53.327 - Please? - Yeah, I suppose I could stay, 00:26:53.427 --> 00:26:55.927 Thanks, Tom. I really appreciate it. See you tomorrow. (hangs up)) 00:26:56.027 --> 00:26:59.227 (Audrey)) I ain't afraid of you and Tom sure as hell ain't scared neither! 00:26:59.327 --> 00:27:03.327 Butthead! Loser! 00:27:04.227 --> 00:27:05.527 (tires screeching)) 00:27:05.527 --> 00:27:10.127 Oh, my God, Thank God he's gone, Hey, so is it OK if I stay here tonight? 00:27:10.227 --> 00:27:14.027 Oh, man, it's... it's not even my house, 00:27:14.027 --> 00:27:16.027 Oh, yeah, 00:27:16.127 --> 00:27:18.427 OK, Well, I sure as hell don't want any charity, 00:27:18.527 --> 00:27:22.927 I mean, it's not like you owe me anything, so... 00:27:23.627 --> 00:27:25.127 And I'm sorry about that whole office thing, 00:27:25.227 --> 00:27:26.627 I know that you didn't mean to get me fired, 00:27:26.727 --> 00:27:31.627 - Yeah, You didn't deserve to get fired, - Thanks, 00:27:31.727 --> 00:27:33.727 OK, 00:27:33.827 --> 00:27:37.927 Well, I guess I'll just go try to find a homeless shelter then, 00:27:41.427 --> 00:27:43.427 - Wait a second, - Yeah? 00:27:43.527 --> 00:27:45.327 (sighs)) God, 00:27:45.427 --> 00:27:51.027 - Look, I suppose you can stay, - Really? Oh! Thanks, Tom, 00:27:51.127 --> 00:27:53.127 You're the best, Oh, and I'll clean up the kitchen, OK? 00:27:53.227 --> 00:27:56.227 - OK, - OK, OK, 00:28:09.227 --> 00:28:11.027 - (doorbell) - (knocking)) 00:28:11.127 --> 00:28:13.327 (Tom)) Yeah, One second, 00:28:13.427 --> 00:28:16.227 - (knocking)) - There's somebody at the door, 00:28:17.827 --> 00:28:19.927 Hi, Uh, can I help you? 00:28:20.027 --> 00:28:23.227 Vasquez sent me here to pick up a package, 00:28:23.227 --> 00:28:26.827 Oh, you're the... Yeah, yeah, yeah, Red told me you might be stopping by, 00:28:26.927 --> 00:28:28.627 Uh... Oh, hi, I'm Tom, 00:28:28.727 --> 00:28:31.727 What is this, Oprah ? Just give me the goddamn package, 00:28:31.827 --> 00:28:35.527 Oh, OK, Yeah, Um... 00:28:36.327 --> 00:28:38.827 I think this is it, 00:28:38.927 --> 00:28:41.727 If this ain't kosher, I'm gonna break his thumbs, 00:28:41.827 --> 00:28:45.727 Oh, well, by law, it should be stamped right on the package there, 00:28:47.427 --> 00:28:51.227 - (. classical) - What... 00:28:51.327 --> 00:28:53.927 (squawks)) 00:28:55.527 --> 00:28:59.327 - Oh, Dinnertime, buddy, - (. classical continues)) 00:29:01.727 --> 00:29:07.927 OJ... today's specials include a scrumptious buffet of mice kebabs, 00:29:08.027 --> 00:29:11.427 - (squawks)) - (gasps)) Aah! Shit! Ah... crap! 00:29:14.727 --> 00:29:16.527 You son of a bitch, 00:29:16.527 --> 00:29:18.427 - (squeaks)) - Ha, 00:29:20.127 --> 00:29:21.327 (grunts)) 00:29:21.427 --> 00:29:24.327 - (chuckles)) I got you now, buddy, - (squealing)) 00:29:24.427 --> 00:29:27.527 (gasps)) Aah! 00:29:27.627 --> 00:29:30.727 Aah! (groans)) 00:29:32.127 --> 00:29:34.427 (squawks)) 00:29:34.427 --> 00:29:37.227 - Dude, that was cool, - Oh, my God, 00:29:38.127 --> 00:29:41.727 - Tommy, easy on the antiques, - (squawking)) 00:29:41.827 --> 00:29:45.527 - Was that an owl? - Yes, OJ got out, How is he flying? 00:29:45.627 --> 00:29:48.927 - Well, he is a bird, - He... no, Jack said that he... 00:29:49.027 --> 00:29:51.027 Aw, shit! I gotta find him, 00:29:51.127 --> 00:29:54.827 Don't worry, He'll probably come back when he's hungry, 00:29:54.927 --> 00:29:58.527 No, I have to find him or I'm gonna lose my job! You know what? 00:29:58.627 --> 00:30:01.727 This isn't gonna help your chances of getting your job back either, 00:30:01.827 --> 00:30:03.227 OK, 00:30:03.327 --> 00:30:06.827 - Where the hell is he? - Tom, relax, 00:30:06.827 --> 00:30:09.427 - Relax? OJ's loose! - (gasping & screaming)) 00:30:09.427 --> 00:30:14.127 - This is no time to relax! - Tom! He's right over here! 00:30:14.727 --> 00:30:16.727 - Right there, right there, right there! - OJ! 00:30:16.827 --> 00:30:19.027 - Right there! - OJ! 00:30:19.127 --> 00:30:23.227 Stop! No, no, Stop, Stop, 00:30:23.327 --> 00:30:26.527 OJ, OJ... 00:30:26.527 --> 00:30:30.927 Get up, What the hell you doing on my property? Planning to rob me? 00:30:31.027 --> 00:30:33.427 No, I-I was just looking for... 00:30:33.527 --> 00:30:38.027 Yeah, yeah, I see what you're looking for, You got a thing for young girls, eh? 00:30:38.027 --> 00:30:39.227 No, 00:30:39.327 --> 00:30:41.827 Then why do you keep eyeing my wife, you perv? 00:30:41.827 --> 00:30:44.327 Your... no, I wasn't looking, l... 00:30:44.327 --> 00:30:47.327 Arthur, are you gonna be back soon? I need you to spot me, 00:30:47.327 --> 00:30:49.127 Just give me a minute, honey, 00:30:49.227 --> 00:30:51.627 - Oh... Please don't kill me, - I'm not gonna kill you, OK, 00:30:51.627 --> 00:30:55.927 If you let me live, I'll give you my most valued possession, Here, take it, 00:30:55.927 --> 00:30:57.427 You know what that is, don't you? 00:30:57.527 --> 00:31:00.427 - Evander Holyfield's ear, - What? 00:31:00.527 --> 00:31:04.027 The part of the ear that Mike Tyson bit off and spit out, 00:31:04.127 --> 00:31:06.127 - But it's white, - So? 00:31:06.227 --> 00:31:10.927 - So, shouldn't it be black? - Well, if it's still on his head, sure, 00:31:11.027 --> 00:31:14.327 But anybody knows that a severed ear loses its color, 00:31:14.427 --> 00:31:16.127 - No, - Sheryl? 00:31:16.227 --> 00:31:18.327 - Yeah? - What happens to an ear 00:31:18.427 --> 00:31:22.627 - if it's severed from your head? - It changes color, Duh, 00:31:22.727 --> 00:31:25.527 - (thud) - (Sheryl) Ow! Damn! 00:31:25.527 --> 00:31:27.827 - (Audrey)) Tina, give me a beer, - (man laughs)) 00:31:27.927 --> 00:31:29.827 - (Tina)) Oops, - (man)) You have got to be kidding me, 00:31:29.827 --> 00:31:32.427 - (Audrey)) Try another one, - (Tina)) Come on, you guys! 00:31:32.527 --> 00:31:34.727 - (clatter) - (Tina)) Party! 00:31:34.827 --> 00:31:37.827 - Come on, let's go! - Audrey... 00:31:37.927 --> 00:31:40.627 - What the hell is going on in here? - Heads up, 00:31:40.727 --> 00:31:41.727 Who are these people? 00:31:41.827 --> 00:31:44.527 I invited some friends over to help us look for the owl, 00:31:44.627 --> 00:31:46.427 And Darryl even fixed the table in the hall, 00:31:46.427 --> 00:31:48.327 - Thank you, - He won't even know it was broken, 00:31:48.427 --> 00:31:50.627 - (bottle breaks)) - (man)) Air ball, 00:31:50.727 --> 00:31:53.627 We'll get that later, Everyone, this is Tom, 00:31:53.727 --> 00:31:55.527 - Yo, Tom, - Hi, guys, 00:31:55.527 --> 00:31:57.027 You guys, Tom's a real good guy and his nuts are gonna just... 00:31:57.027 --> 00:31:59.427 Audrey, could you... 00:32:00.927 --> 00:32:05.327 - What? - Listen, I appreciate all your help, 00:32:05.427 --> 00:32:08.927 But could you make sure that your friends stay out of the house? 00:32:09.027 --> 00:32:12.827 - All of them or just the colored guy? - No, all of them, 00:32:13.427 --> 00:32:17.027 Ooh, that's smart, That way the colored guy won't take it personal, 00:32:17.127 --> 00:32:20.227 - I have nothing against... Look, - What? 00:32:20.327 --> 00:32:21.727 I am responsible for this house 00:32:21.827 --> 00:32:24.527 and I can't have all of these people hanging around, 00:32:24.627 --> 00:32:28.127 OK, all right, I got it, You guys, let's move it out, 00:32:28.227 --> 00:32:30.927 - Aw, I was just getting started, - Good idea, 00:32:31.027 --> 00:32:33.327 Thanks, guys, That's great, 00:32:33.427 --> 00:32:37.027 - (Tina)) What about the cake? - Don't worry, they're all good people, 00:32:37.127 --> 00:32:39.827 They're not gonna steal nothing or drink too much like the lndians, 00:32:39.827 --> 00:32:43.527 Look... just make sure they stay outside, 00:32:43.627 --> 00:32:46.127 - OK? - OK, 00:32:50.327 --> 00:32:52.827 (door opens%shuts)) 00:32:52.927 --> 00:32:54.727 - Lisa? - Hi, Tom, 00:32:54.827 --> 00:32:57.927 Uh, you're home? Why are you home? 00:32:58.027 --> 00:33:01.127 It's not worth going into, I got in a huge fight with Hans, 00:33:01.127 --> 00:33:06.527 Oh, So... it's over? 00:33:07.527 --> 00:33:09.827 It's my own fault for dating a guy my dad likes, 00:33:09.927 --> 00:33:10.927 Really? 00:33:10.927 --> 00:33:13.727 Yeah, he's one of his top marketing execs, You know, Harvard Law, 00:33:13.827 --> 00:33:17.527 Comes from a good family, top of the tennis letter at the country club, 00:33:17.627 --> 00:33:21.527 - Tom, can I talk to you for a second? - Audrey? 00:33:21.527 --> 00:33:24.727 Yeah, She came to, uh, talk to your dad, 00:33:25.827 --> 00:33:29.627 OK, I'm gonna go in my room, You could stay if you want, 00:33:29.627 --> 00:33:31.627 OK, 00:33:31.727 --> 00:33:34.427 - Tom? - Audrey, I'll be right there, OK? 00:33:34.527 --> 00:33:36.127 OK, 00:33:36.227 --> 00:33:40.727 - Or you could go, - You know, maybe we could talk... 00:33:42.027 --> 00:33:43.627 ...later, 00:33:43.627 --> 00:33:46.927 Here, How about this one? 00:33:47.027 --> 00:33:49.527 - What's going on? - We found the owl! 00:33:49.627 --> 00:33:52.927 - Where is he? - Uh, well, he got away, 00:33:53.027 --> 00:33:55.527 - Where'd he go? - He hopped somewhere in the bushes, 00:33:55.627 --> 00:33:57.827 - That's right, - What are you doing? 00:33:57.827 --> 00:34:01.227 Getting hamburger meat, That's a good way to lure birds, 00:34:01.327 --> 00:34:04.927 - They like hamburger meat? - I don't know, I've never had a bird, 00:34:05.027 --> 00:34:07.527 - But most animals respond to meat, - It's a fact, 00:34:07.627 --> 00:34:10.427 Wanna help me separate the meat? 00:34:11.127 --> 00:34:13.327 Speed, tell Tom about the Kennedy assassination, 00:34:13.427 --> 00:34:16.127 This is so cool, Tom, 'cause Speed knows who killed JFK, 00:34:16.227 --> 00:34:18.627 No, ask him! Tom, ask him, 00:34:18.627 --> 00:34:21.427 - Ask him who killed him, - All right, All right, 00:34:21.527 --> 00:34:27.327 - Who killed JFK? - Desi Arnaz, 00:34:29.027 --> 00:34:33.627 - Oh, - His life just changed, 00:34:33.727 --> 00:34:35.427 (squeaking)) 00:34:47.227 --> 00:34:48.327 Oh, 00:34:52.927 --> 00:34:56.627 Oh, God, Oh... oh... oh... 00:34:57.727 --> 00:35:00.727 - Tom! - (gasps)) Shit, Lisa, 00:35:01.927 --> 00:35:04.927 - Uh, what are you doing in here? - This is my closet, 00:35:05.027 --> 00:35:09.727 Oh, Oh... uh, I had something in my pants, 00:35:10.327 --> 00:35:17.227 Um, I was feeding the mouse to the bird and he, uh, ran down my pants, 00:35:17.927 --> 00:35:19.727 - (mice squeaks)) - I'm sorry that, uh... 00:35:19.727 --> 00:35:22.227 Oh, look! There it is! That way! The bedroom, 00:35:24.427 --> 00:35:26.727 - (Lisa)) Whoa, Watch out! - Aah! (groans)) 00:35:26.827 --> 00:35:30.827 - Oh, my gosh, Are you OK? - Yep, Yep, I'm good, 00:35:30.927 --> 00:35:32.927 Don't worry, we'll get it later, 00:35:34.827 --> 00:35:36.627 Oh, here, Let me help you, 00:35:36.727 --> 00:35:40.227 You know, I'm really glad you stayed, I needed a good laugh tonight, 00:35:40.327 --> 00:35:43.427 Thanks, Wow, Yeah, could I make a bigger ass out of myself? 00:35:43.427 --> 00:35:48.627 - (chuckling)) Do you want some wine? - Uh, no, thanks, 00:35:48.627 --> 00:35:49.727 Yeah, sure, 00:35:49.827 --> 00:35:51.727 - Cheers, - Cheers, 00:35:54.127 --> 00:35:57.127 Oh, my God, Is that signed by Walter Payton? 00:35:57.227 --> 00:36:01.327 Yeah, "Sweetness", '85 Bears, Only the greatest team ever to play the game, 00:36:01.427 --> 00:36:05.727 Shut up, Walter Payton, Jim McMahon, Mike Singletary, 00:36:05.827 --> 00:36:08.027 You know what? You may be the coolest girl ever, 00:36:08.127 --> 00:36:10.327 - You like football? - Yeah, I love it, 00:36:10.327 --> 00:36:12.327 I didn't know you guys liked football, 00:36:12.327 --> 00:36:15.127 Yeah, No, me and Paul watch the game every Sunday, 00:36:15.227 --> 00:36:17.127 - Paul, too? - Yeah, 00:36:17.127 --> 00:36:20.027 - Oh, - (chuckles)) 00:36:20.027 --> 00:36:22.427 Oh, what's that? 00:36:22.527 --> 00:36:25.727 Oh, it's nothing, It's just something I used to do, 00:36:25.827 --> 00:36:29.727 That is really good, I didn't know you were an artist, 00:36:29.827 --> 00:36:33.427 I used to be, but I couldn't get any more of my friends to pose nude for me, 00:36:33.527 --> 00:36:37.627 - You wouldn't be interested, would you? - Uh... 00:36:37.727 --> 00:36:41.127 You're blushing, I was just joking, 00:36:41.227 --> 00:36:45.427 I'm not blushing, I just-l just get red from time to time, 00:36:47.027 --> 00:36:48.327 You are so funny, 00:36:48.427 --> 00:36:51.827 No, seriously, you should really pursue this, I mean, you're good, 00:36:51.927 --> 00:36:55.827 I would, but it doesn't really fit in with my father's plan for me, 00:36:55.827 --> 00:36:59.327 Future of Midnight Owl Publishing, 00:36:59.327 --> 00:37:02.027 - (mice squeaks)) - Oh, look! There it is, 00:37:02.027 --> 00:37:05.127 - He's right there, Through the door, - We'll get him, We'll get him, 00:37:05.227 --> 00:37:07.527 - Whoa! Watch out! - (groans)) 00:37:07.627 --> 00:37:09.227 - Are you OK? - Your dad's gonna kill me, 00:37:09.327 --> 00:37:12.227 No, don't worry about it, It's my brother's, My dad won't care, 00:37:12.327 --> 00:37:13.527 Oh, Red, 00:37:13.627 --> 00:37:15.627 - Oh, so Dad told you? - About what? 00:37:15.727 --> 00:37:18.327 - The restraining order, - How's that? 00:37:18.427 --> 00:37:21.727 Yeah, Red's not allowed within 100 yards of me, my dad, or this house, 00:37:21.827 --> 00:37:23.827 He... uh, he didn't-he didn't mention that, 00:37:23.927 --> 00:37:27.427 Red's a freak, You don't want to be around my dad if he finds out 00:37:27.527 --> 00:37:29.927 anyone was in this house, especially Red, 00:37:30.027 --> 00:37:31.727 It's like wherever he is, there's trouble, 00:37:31.727 --> 00:37:33.927 I mean, one time, he had this big party 'cause Dad was out of town 00:37:34.027 --> 00:37:35.327 and my dad came home early... 00:37:35.327 --> 00:37:39.527 Hey, uh... you know, since the mouse is gone, what say we, uh, go back inside? 00:37:39.627 --> 00:37:41.727 OK, 00:37:41.827 --> 00:37:43.727 (grunts)) 00:37:43.727 --> 00:37:46.327 (both screaming)) 00:37:46.327 --> 00:37:49.427 (. synthesizer) 00:38:08.627 --> 00:38:12.227 - It was up for an Oscar? I hated it! - I know! (laughing)) 00:38:12.227 --> 00:38:16.527 Oh, I hated that movie! Man, I can't believe you, 00:38:16.627 --> 00:38:20.327 You're like... you're so different from how you are at work, 00:38:20.427 --> 00:38:24.427 What am I gonna do? Like, walk around with my Walter Payton jersey? 00:38:24.527 --> 00:38:28.627 No, no, I get it, It's, like, at work you have to be Lisa Taylor: 00:38:28.727 --> 00:38:32.427 the, you know, loyal employee to the family firm, 00:38:32.527 --> 00:38:33.927 And I have to be... Tom... 00:38:34.027 --> 00:38:38.727 Tom Stansfield: the guy who will do anything for anybody, 00:38:40.327 --> 00:38:42.227 Yup, That's me, 00:38:44.127 --> 00:38:47.127 I swear, it's like I can just talk to you about anything, 00:38:47.127 --> 00:38:49.827 I know, exactly, It's... 00:38:49.927 --> 00:38:53.427 - Yeah, this is crazy, - Yeah, it is, 00:38:54.627 --> 00:38:59.427 I guess it's because there's no attraction between us, you know? 00:38:59.527 --> 00:39:00.527 Yeah, 00:39:00.627 --> 00:39:03.427 You know, there's none of that sexual tension, 00:39:03.527 --> 00:39:05.127 - Yeah, - It's like I'm with a girlfriend, 00:39:05.127 --> 00:39:07.327 - It's great, isn't it? - Yeah, 00:39:07.427 --> 00:39:09.627 I mean, maybe we could go to the mall sometime and go shopping, 00:39:09.727 --> 00:39:11.827 - That would be fun! Wouldn't it be fun? - Yeah, 00:39:11.827 --> 00:39:13.827 Wait, you have to listen to this song, 00:39:13.927 --> 00:39:16.027 Come on, I need someone to dance with! 00:39:16.127 --> 00:39:18.527 - You don't want to see me dance, - (. "You Make Me Feel Like Dancing') 00:39:18.627 --> 00:39:21.927 - Come on, dance with me, - I have no idea what I'm doing, 00:39:22.027 --> 00:39:25.727 Come on, Put your hands together, Yeah! Now go underneath, 00:39:25.827 --> 00:39:27.827 - What... like this? - Yeah! 00:39:27.827 --> 00:39:31.127 - Like that? - Yeah! (squeals)) 00:39:31.227 --> 00:39:34.627 Hold on, hold on, Watch, watch, watch, 00:39:34.727 --> 00:39:36.327 - (pants rip)) - Oh, 00:39:36.327 --> 00:39:39.627 - Yeah! Oh... - I'm trying to do too much, 00:39:39.727 --> 00:39:43.027 (laughing)) Oh! Yeah! 00:39:43.027 --> 00:39:45.827 - (squealing)) - I'm a dancer, 00:39:45.827 --> 00:39:47.127 - Catch me, - Oh... what? 00:39:47.127 --> 00:39:49.127 (squeals)) 00:39:50.827 --> 00:39:52.527 - I got you! - Whoa! 00:39:52.627 --> 00:39:55.227 Whoa... (chuckles)) 00:39:55.327 --> 00:39:58.727 OK, I am doomed, 00:39:59.727 --> 00:40:01.727 Here, 00:40:02.827 --> 00:40:04.527 (. "Better Man" by Martina Sorbara)) 00:40:04.627 --> 00:40:06.927 Oh, I love this song, 00:40:07.027 --> 00:40:09.927 My friend Jenny does this really wild strip routine 00:40:09.927 --> 00:40:15.427 for her boyfriend to this song, It's super sexy, Even you'd appreciate it, 00:40:15.527 --> 00:40:20.727 I wish I could be like her, you know? She's so free and everything, 00:40:36.527 --> 00:40:38.527 (giggles)) 00:41:08.427 --> 00:41:10.927 (giggling)) 00:41:14.727 --> 00:41:16.727 So, what do you think? 00:41:16.827 --> 00:41:21.827 Ah, it's... it's, uh, very nice, 00:41:21.927 --> 00:41:25.427 So if you weren't gay, this would turn you on, right? 00:41:26.227 --> 00:41:31.927 - Gay? Who said I was gay? - My father, You mean it's not true? 00:41:32.027 --> 00:41:34.927 - No! - No? God, I'm so embarrassed! 00:41:35.027 --> 00:41:38.627 - I can't believe you'd let me do this! - I didn't mean to... I mean, um... 00:41:38.727 --> 00:41:41.027 Why would your father say that I'm gay? 00:41:41.127 --> 00:41:45.727 I don't know, Well, you can't blame him entirely, I mean, you are a little feminine, 00:41:45.827 --> 00:41:48.427 - (gasps)) - Don't be hurt, 00:41:49.827 --> 00:41:52.027 It's OK, 00:41:52.127 --> 00:41:54.827 Hans is a bit of feminine, too, 00:41:54.927 --> 00:41:58.527 What exactly did Hans do anyway? 00:41:59.427 --> 00:42:02.427 Well, it's not like he did just one thing, 00:42:05.527 --> 00:42:07.727 It's more about trust, 00:42:07.827 --> 00:42:11.627 Yeah, Trust is... it's important, 00:42:12.227 --> 00:42:15.027 Trust is everything, 00:42:15.027 --> 00:42:19.827 I don't know, Maybe it's me, It's like I'm just sending out some kind of vibe, 00:42:19.827 --> 00:42:22.327 - I can't attract a decent guy, - No, 00:42:22.427 --> 00:42:24.527 - What's wrong with me? - Don't even worry about it, 00:42:24.627 --> 00:42:27.727 You're gonna find another guy so fast, 00:42:28.727 --> 00:42:33.427 I mean, look at you, You're amazing, 00:42:34.827 --> 00:42:39.227 - You really think so? - Why do you think I'm here tonight? 00:42:40.827 --> 00:42:44.027 Oh, God, Tom, 00:42:45.827 --> 00:42:48.927 You didn't know, You thought that... 00:42:50.227 --> 00:42:52.627 (door opens)) 00:43:00.527 --> 00:43:05.227 Uh... uh... I'm gonna... I'll be right back, 00:43:05.227 --> 00:43:09.827 I'm just gonna go and check and see if Audrey needs towels, 00:43:09.927 --> 00:43:12.527 Tom, you don't have to lie to me, 00:43:12.627 --> 00:43:16.327 If you have to go to the bathroom, go take a crap and come back, 00:43:18.427 --> 00:43:20.327 (chuckles)) 00:43:22.627 --> 00:43:25.427 (clatter) 00:43:27.427 --> 00:43:31.027 What the... hey! What the hell are you doing here, man? 00:43:33.927 --> 00:43:34.927 (grunts)) 00:43:35.027 --> 00:43:39.227 You try to bone Vasquez out of 20 grand and you ask me what I'm doing? 00:43:39.227 --> 00:43:43.427 You think I work for Mrs, Fields? You think my boss likes to bake cookies? 00:43:44.227 --> 00:43:47.327 - Whoa! What are you doing? Come on, - You tried to sell me flour, 00:43:47.427 --> 00:43:51.327 Flour? I-I don't even know what you're talk... What are you... Come on! 00:43:51.427 --> 00:43:53.727 Look, I'm just housesitting for my boss, 00:43:53.827 --> 00:43:56.827 - Who's your boss? - Jack Taylor, 00:43:56.927 --> 00:44:02.227 Jack Taylor, huh? I did time in Joliet with a Jack Taylor, 00:44:02.327 --> 00:44:07.227 Average height, medium hair, horrible case of folliculitis on his ass? 00:44:07.327 --> 00:44:10.827 - I wouldn't know about the folliculitis, - I thought you said he was your boss, 00:44:10.927 --> 00:44:13.927 - He is, - And you never saw his ass? 00:44:14.027 --> 00:44:16.827 - Why would I see my boss's ass? - It stands to reason, 00:44:16.927 --> 00:44:20.227 You work for a guy long enough, sooner or later, 00:44:20.327 --> 00:44:23.227 you're gonna get a glimpse of his ass, 00:44:24.927 --> 00:44:26.927 Listen, I-I don't know what line of work you're in, 00:44:27.027 --> 00:44:30.027 but I've never seen my boss's ass, 00:44:30.127 --> 00:44:33.027 Hey, man... 00:44:33.027 --> 00:44:35.827 Hey! Hey, stop it or I'm gonna call the cops! 00:44:35.827 --> 00:44:39.427 And tell them what? Your drug deal went bad? 00:44:39.527 --> 00:44:42.027 You rat me out, I'm gonna carve you up like a turkey 00:44:42.027 --> 00:44:44.727 and beat your kids with what's left of you, 00:44:44.827 --> 00:44:48.127 - I don't have any kids, - I can wait, 00:44:48.227 --> 00:44:51.727 (. cell phone ringing "Fur Elise" by Beethoven)) 00:44:57.327 --> 00:45:02.327 Excuse me, Hello? Right, OK, 00:45:03.727 --> 00:45:06.027 Tommy, let's get clear on something, 00:45:06.027 --> 00:45:09.827 In the next 60 minutes, I'm gonna bring Vasquez what he paid for 00:45:09.927 --> 00:45:12.627 or your gift-wrapped nuts, 00:45:14.727 --> 00:45:16.627 (door shuts)) 00:45:19.227 --> 00:45:21.327 - Oh, hi, Tom, What's going on? - Yeah, That's what I wanna know, 00:45:21.427 --> 00:45:24.727 What's going on with your dad's gift? See... Do you see that guy? 00:45:24.827 --> 00:45:26.327 He was gonna kill me! 00:45:26.427 --> 00:45:28.327 Don't you think you're overreacting a little, Tom? 00:45:28.427 --> 00:45:33.427 Overreacting? The guy had a knife! I don't think that I am overreacting! 00:45:33.427 --> 00:45:35.627 He probably just had the wrong address, 00:45:35.727 --> 00:45:39.927 I mean, there's gotta be over a dozen Jack Taylor's in Chicago alone, 00:45:40.027 --> 00:45:43.427 I'm gonna go to my dad's bedroom, You tell me if the guy shows up again, 00:45:43.427 --> 00:45:45.027 All right, All right, You listen to me, 00:45:45.127 --> 00:45:47.327 You're not even supposed to be in this house, 00:45:47.427 --> 00:45:48.327 Says who? 00:45:48.427 --> 00:45:51.227 I know about the restraining order, Red, 00:45:51.227 --> 00:45:55.927 Restraining-shmaining, I mean, that's just a big misunderstanding, 00:45:56.027 --> 00:45:57.627 (Audrey)) Tom! It's OJ! 00:45:57.727 --> 00:45:59.727 (overlapping chatter) 00:46:01.327 --> 00:46:03.727 (Audrey and friends)) Oh... 00:46:03.727 --> 00:46:08.427 - Whoa, Hey, Who are you? - I'm here to see Lisa, My name's Hans, 00:46:10.627 --> 00:46:12.027 - Is that so shocking? - No, 00:46:12.127 --> 00:46:13.727 What, you surprised she'd go out with someone like me? 00:46:13.827 --> 00:46:15.027 No, no, It's not... 00:46:15.127 --> 00:46:17.627 Give me a break, man, You oughta be ashamed of yourself, 00:46:17.727 --> 00:46:20.027 Let me tell you something, There are a lot of girls out there 00:46:20.127 --> 00:46:22.427 who can see past the fact that I just happen to be... 00:46:22.527 --> 00:46:24.027 a few pounds overweight, 00:46:24.127 --> 00:46:26.527 (crying)) You know, inside I'm just like everyone else, 00:46:26.627 --> 00:46:29.727 - Let me get you a tissue, - Thank you, 00:46:29.727 --> 00:46:31.927 - I'm on the second day of a new diet, - Hey, uh, Hans... 00:46:32.027 --> 00:46:33.827 - I gave up chocolate, - I'm really sorry, 00:46:33.927 --> 00:46:36.527 I think that, uh, we just got off on the wrong foot, 00:46:36.627 --> 00:46:42.027 Oh... uh... It's good to meet you, Hans, I'm Tom, 00:46:42.127 --> 00:46:43.327 l, uh... (clears throat) 00:46:43.427 --> 00:46:46.127 I'm just a friend of Lisa's, 00:46:46.227 --> 00:46:49.327 Oh, great, Well, maybe you can help me, Is she here? Lisa! Lisa! 00:46:49.427 --> 00:46:51.027 Whoa, Hans, you know what? 00:46:51.127 --> 00:46:54.027 Maybe right now isn't a great time for you to see Lisa, 00:46:54.127 --> 00:46:56.227 What say, uh, we get you a drink? 00:46:56.327 --> 00:46:59.127 Oh, OK, Yeah, she's probably really upset, 00:46:59.227 --> 00:47:03.727 You see, we got in a misunderstanding tonight and, well, she left me, 00:47:03.827 --> 00:47:05.927 - Wow, that's unfortunate, - Yeah, 00:47:06.027 --> 00:47:07.827 Uh, what happened? 00:47:07.827 --> 00:47:12.127 Well, I think seeing me naked from behind like that kind of shocked her, 00:47:12.127 --> 00:47:16.127 Oh, So, tonight was the first time, 00:47:16.127 --> 00:47:18.927 Yeah, Tonight was the first time, It was awesome, 00:47:19.027 --> 00:47:22.127 I mean, I was lying up on the bed like this with one leg straight up in the air, 00:47:22.227 --> 00:47:24.127 - I don't think I really need to see... - And I had a handful of ass right here... 00:47:24.127 --> 00:47:25.127 - Whoa, - ...and I had a handful of this, 00:47:25.227 --> 00:47:28.827 Hans, please, Whoa, God, you're... that's... 00:47:29.527 --> 00:47:33.527 - And that's when Lisa walked in, - What? 00:47:33.627 --> 00:47:36.327 She caught me in the bed with a blonde, 00:47:36.327 --> 00:47:37.827 What? 00:47:37.927 --> 00:47:40.627 Aw, come on, man, Tell me you haven't ever wanted to do it with a... 00:47:40.727 --> 00:47:43.827 Hans, Hans, No... you cheated on her, 00:47:45.527 --> 00:47:48.627 You know something, Tom? You're right, 00:47:48.727 --> 00:47:53.527 Aw, I guess that was cheating, And now I've gone and lost everyone, 00:47:53.527 --> 00:47:56.127 I should have known from the start it wasn't right, 00:47:56.227 --> 00:47:58.727 She kept telling me I reminded her of her dad, 00:47:58.727 --> 00:48:01.827 Hans, you gotta realize that this is over, you know? 00:48:01.827 --> 00:48:05.427 And you gotta put an end to it, and-and move on, 00:48:05.527 --> 00:48:08.927 - And get yourself to a better place, OK? - Yes, 00:48:09.027 --> 00:48:13.127 - I think you know what I mean, - Yeah, I do know what you mean, 00:48:13.227 --> 00:48:17.327 And I'm ready, I know what I have to do, 00:48:21.627 --> 00:48:23.827 Well, I guess this is good-bye, 00:48:27.227 --> 00:48:31.327 - (squawking)) - OJ! 00:48:31.427 --> 00:48:33.127 (Hans)) Thanks, Tom, 00:48:33.227 --> 00:48:35.127 (Tom)) OJ, come back! 00:48:35.727 --> 00:48:37.827 (dog barks)) 00:48:37.927 --> 00:48:39.927 OJ! 00:48:42.027 --> 00:48:43.527 (squawks)) 00:48:50.427 --> 00:48:54.027 Hello, You must be Julie's date, Come in, Come in, 00:48:54.127 --> 00:48:57.527 Actually I'm just here looking for a bird, 00:48:57.627 --> 00:49:01.027 Make yourself at home, Albert, Julie's still getting ready, 00:49:01.127 --> 00:49:04.327 - No, actually, uh, my name is Tom, - I'm sorry, I'm hard of hearing, 00:49:04.427 --> 00:49:06.927 - Could you speak up, please? - (shouts)) My name is Tom! 00:49:06.927 --> 00:49:09.427 I could've sworn Julie said your name was Albert, 00:49:09.427 --> 00:49:11.127 No, see, I'm afraid that you're mistaken, 00:49:11.227 --> 00:49:15.427 - Is someone here? - Yes, This is Julie's date, Albert, 00:49:15.527 --> 00:49:17.127 - Ah! Ah! - This is my nephew, George, 00:49:17.227 --> 00:49:21.427 - He's blind and crippled, - Oh, Uh... (shouts)) nice to meet you, 00:49:21.527 --> 00:49:22.727 I'm not deaf, 00:49:22.827 --> 00:49:27.427 Excuse me, I'll go see what's keeping Julie, She's probably nervous, 00:49:27.527 --> 00:49:29.327 So you're Julie's date, huh? 00:49:29.427 --> 00:49:32.627 No, I'm just... I just came here, I was looking for an owl, 00:49:32.727 --> 00:49:36.627 (laughs)) You don't have to make lame excuses, 00:49:36.627 --> 00:49:40.427 Listen, do you know what the advantage is in being a cripple? 00:49:40.427 --> 00:49:42.327 No, I can't say that I do, 00:49:42.327 --> 00:49:44.627 You don't really care to hear much what I have to say, do you? 00:49:44.727 --> 00:49:47.427 No, no, It's not that, I'm... 00:49:48.427 --> 00:49:50.427 You know what? Go ahead, I'm listening, 00:49:50.527 --> 00:49:52.727 Sit down, Tom, 00:49:56.727 --> 00:49:59.227 You know what I gained by becoming a quad? 00:49:59.327 --> 00:50:01.327 What, are you shaking your head? I can't see, you know! 00:50:01.427 --> 00:50:06.227 I'm sorry, Uh... uh... Tell me what you gained, 00:50:06.327 --> 00:50:09.227 I no longer need my Viagra, 00:50:10.127 --> 00:50:13.627 Now I can maintain my arousal for hours, 00:50:13.727 --> 00:50:16.227 That's-that's great, I guess things have a way 00:50:16.327 --> 00:50:18.027 of evening themselves out in the long run, huh? 00:50:18.127 --> 00:50:20.527 No, not really, And do you know why? 00:50:20.627 --> 00:50:21.927 No, why? 00:50:22.027 --> 00:50:24.427 Because I am a blind, quad freak, you moron! 00:50:24.527 --> 00:50:26.527 What, you think women dig this?! 00:50:26.627 --> 00:50:27.827 - I mean, you think women go... - Well, hello, 00:50:27.927 --> 00:50:29.827 ..."l wanna give that mutant freak my number"? 00:50:29.927 --> 00:50:33.227 - Ken Morehouse, I'm Julie's dad, - Hey, nice to meet you, 00:50:33.327 --> 00:50:36.827 ls, uh, George boring you with his self-pitying tripe? 00:50:36.827 --> 00:50:39.227 - Tripe... - No, not at all, 00:50:39.227 --> 00:50:42.527 "I'm blind, I'm crippled, Boohoo-hoo," 00:50:42.527 --> 00:50:45.627 Leave the room, I wanna talk to Albert alone for a second, 00:50:45.727 --> 00:50:48.027 - I can stay if I want, - Leave the room! 00:50:48.127 --> 00:50:49.327 - OK, OK, - Get out! 00:50:49.427 --> 00:50:51.827 - You don't have to be huffy about it! - Get out now! Get out! 00:50:51.827 --> 00:50:55.527 - OK, - Turn it, turn it, turn it, 00:50:55.527 --> 00:50:58.527 - Oh, for God's sakes, - (clatter) 00:50:58.627 --> 00:51:01.527 - I'm so sorry, - (George)) Who the hell put that there? 00:51:01.627 --> 00:51:02.627 - (cat meows)) - (thud) 00:51:02.727 --> 00:51:06.127 My daughter's gonna be a few minutes, Have a-Have a seat, Albert, 00:51:06.127 --> 00:51:07.827 - Tom, - No, Ken, 00:51:07.927 --> 00:51:09.227 - Right, You're Ken, - Yes, 00:51:09.327 --> 00:51:12.727 Before you say anything, Albert, I just want you to know that Julie 00:51:12.727 --> 00:51:17.327 is really self-conscious about her appearance since the... the accident, 00:51:17.427 --> 00:51:18.527 - (door shuts)) - Right... 00:51:18.527 --> 00:51:23.027 - Oh, Julie, - Julie, this is Albert, Albert, Julie, 00:51:23.127 --> 00:51:26.927 - It's nice to meet you, Albert, - Wow, It's... wow, 00:51:26.927 --> 00:51:32.427 It's nice to meet you, too, But, the thing is, is that I'm not Albert, 00:51:34.127 --> 00:51:38.227 - That is to say that I'm not your date, - Oh,, 00:51:38.227 --> 00:51:41.227 There's been a giant misunderstanding, 00:51:41.327 --> 00:51:44.827 - Oh, how could you? - (crying)) I knew this would happen! 00:51:44.927 --> 00:51:47.127 No, I'm telling the truth, 00:51:47.227 --> 00:51:50.227 Julie wasn't pretty enough for you, Mr, GQ? Is that it? 00:51:50.327 --> 00:51:54.827 - No, you don't understand, - Oh, I understand, Fabio, 00:51:54.927 --> 00:51:57.727 - You broke that poor girl's heart, - No, no, See, I'm not... 00:51:57.827 --> 00:52:01.227 Do you think Julie is an idiot? Do you think she bought your little fairy tale 00:52:01.327 --> 00:52:03.927 Mr, I'm Too Sexy for my medical booties? 00:52:04.727 --> 00:52:07.327 - Oh, th... - Get the hell out of here, 00:52:07.427 --> 00:52:12.027 Or I'll kick your pretty-boy ass to kingdom come, 00:52:12.127 --> 00:52:16.027 - Am I interrupting something? - No, it's just that the... 00:52:16.127 --> 00:52:20.427 - (squawks)) - (grunts)) 00:52:20.527 --> 00:52:23.227 Tom, there's two things that we need to talk about, 00:52:23.327 --> 00:52:24.327 What? 00:52:24.427 --> 00:52:26.627 First of all, I don't wanna wear these booties anymore, 00:52:26.727 --> 00:52:29.627 - No one else is wearing the booties, - Fine, 00:52:29.727 --> 00:52:33.527 - What's the other thing? - Tina thinks she's got cancer, 00:52:35.427 --> 00:52:37.627 - Do you feel it? - Uh, I'm just... 00:52:37.627 --> 00:52:42.027 - What's supposed to be there? I don't... - See, Tina? 00:52:42.127 --> 00:52:45.227 Move your hand to the left, Now move it around, 00:52:45.327 --> 00:52:47.527 Uh-huh, 00:52:47.627 --> 00:52:51.327 - Don't you feel anything? - Yeah, I mean, no, no, 00:52:51.327 --> 00:52:53.127 No, it seems to be... Well... 00:52:53.227 --> 00:52:55.827 Tina, your breast is no different than mine, OK? 00:52:55.827 --> 00:53:00.927 - It is, There's no comparison, - Tom, feel my breast and compare, 00:53:01.027 --> 00:53:03.827 Now, do you detect any difference between our breasts? 00:53:03.827 --> 00:53:06.927 - Well... You gotta slow down a little, - It sure feels good, 00:53:07.027 --> 00:53:09.627 - Well, yours is a... - (door opens)) 00:53:09.627 --> 00:53:12.927 - Lisa, this isn't what it looks like, - I believed everything you said, 00:53:13.527 --> 00:53:14.427 I'm... 00:53:14.527 --> 00:53:16.027 It was all just a bunch of lines, wasn't it? 00:53:16.127 --> 00:53:20.227 No, no, Lisa, it was all... I swear to you, I meant every word, 00:53:20.327 --> 00:53:21.727 This is... nothing's going on here, 00:53:21.827 --> 00:53:24.727 Great, Tom, I'm glad you think I'm a complete idiot, 00:53:24.727 --> 00:53:29.627 No, no, I'm telling you, I was just checking these girls for breast cancer, 00:53:30.327 --> 00:53:34.927 - You make me sick, - No... Lisa, wait! 00:53:35.527 --> 00:53:38.327 - She's never gonna forgive me, - Of course she will, 00:53:38.327 --> 00:53:39.527 Is this the first time you cheated on her? 00:53:39.627 --> 00:53:42.927 Yeah, No! I... yeah... wait, 00:53:43.027 --> 00:53:46.527 I didn't cheat on her, I mean, you were there for God's sakes! 00:53:46.627 --> 00:53:48.127 Look, I know that you didn't cheat on her, 00:53:48.227 --> 00:53:50.427 - I mean, you were a little grabby, but... - I... 00:53:50.427 --> 00:53:52.027 Look, don't you think we should just find the owl 00:53:52.127 --> 00:53:53.927 and worry about your little "affair" later? 00:53:54.027 --> 00:53:57.027 l... I am get... I'm getting angry and I don't get angry, 00:53:57.127 --> 00:53:58.627 - Ugh! - Hey, Speed? 00:53:58.727 --> 00:54:00.827 Hey, can I ask you a question? 00:54:02.027 --> 00:54:06.527 - What are you... I thought you left, - I did... to get this, 00:54:07.227 --> 00:54:10.927 - All right, Why is the fire going? - Cozy, isn't it? 00:54:11.027 --> 00:54:15.027 - All right, You put that down, - Make me, 00:54:16.227 --> 00:54:18.227 All right, 00:54:20.227 --> 00:54:24.327 Hey! Hey! Put the crowbar down! 00:54:24.427 --> 00:54:27.927 Or I will blow your ass to fucktown! 00:54:39.627 --> 00:54:42.527 That's right, 00:54:43.927 --> 00:54:46.927 - Don't you ever threaten me, - But... I got a gun, 00:54:49.127 --> 00:54:52.727 - What are you doing? - Well, Tommy, we both have guns, 00:54:52.827 --> 00:54:55.527 Only difference is, you don't have the guts to use yours, 00:54:55.627 --> 00:55:00.127 Oh, yeah? Well, what makes you so sure? 00:55:01.627 --> 00:55:03.727 Oh, I'm sure, 00:55:08.327 --> 00:55:10.427 (trickling)) 00:55:10.527 --> 00:55:16.827 Oh! Oh... Jesus! What the... What are you, out of your mind? 00:55:16.827 --> 00:55:20.627 - (phone ringing)) - Stop that! Are you crazy, man?! 00:55:20.727 --> 00:55:22.527 (chimes)) 00:55:22.627 --> 00:55:25.427 - Hello? - (Taylor) Stansfield. Anything to report? 00:55:25.527 --> 00:55:29.227 Sir! Uh, everything's great, I got... everything's under control, 00:55:29.227 --> 00:55:31.227 - Did OJ get enough water? - (TJ)) Whoa! 00:55:31.327 --> 00:55:33.627 Uh, OJ... What? Oh, yes, 00:55:33.727 --> 00:55:37.427 Uh, Jack, could you hold on? I'm gonna shoot your pecker off, 00:55:37.527 --> 00:55:40.127 I don't plan on being away the entire weekend. 00:55:40.227 --> 00:55:41.327 - I hate you! I hate you! - It's possible I may be 00:55:41.327 --> 00:55:45.627 coming home early, so make sure that everything's in order. 00:55:45.627 --> 00:55:46.627 Jesus! 00:55:46.727 --> 00:55:48.527 Oh, something I forgot to tell you. 00:55:48.627 --> 00:55:51.627 - Sir? - The fishtank. It's a little low. 00:55:51.627 --> 00:55:53.627 - I'm taking care of that right now, - Good. 00:55:53.727 --> 00:55:56.427 When I get back, I want to talk to you about that position in Creative. 00:55:56.527 --> 00:55:58.527 - Aah! - Don't get excited yet. 00:55:58.627 --> 00:56:00.527 I didn't say you had the job. We'll discuss it. 00:56:00.527 --> 00:56:03.827 Uh, thank you, sir, Uh, great, Bye, 00:56:05.727 --> 00:56:08.127 Holy shit! 00:56:11.427 --> 00:56:13.827 I just... 00:56:15.627 --> 00:56:19.827 Boy, I'm tapped out, You got anything to drink? 00:56:19.827 --> 00:56:23.827 In the kitchen, Thanks, 00:56:28.327 --> 00:56:29.827 Dammit! 00:56:29.827 --> 00:56:35.527 Whoa! What the hay happened in here? Tom, did you have a little accident? 00:56:35.627 --> 00:56:39.527 You might wanna try a few Kegels, Kinda tighten it up down there, 00:56:39.627 --> 00:56:45.227 - That's it! - I'm doing 'em right now, And release, 00:56:45.227 --> 00:56:49.127 Well, when in Rome... 00:56:49.227 --> 00:56:53.027 - (trickling)) - . Oh, Canada 00:57:02.527 --> 00:57:07.227 "Jack Taylor, Rectacid, Apply liberally to buttocks as needed 00:57:07.327 --> 00:57:11.827 to reduce redness and other symptoms of folliculitis," 00:57:15.427 --> 00:57:17.627 Son of a bitch, 00:57:17.727 --> 00:57:21.927 - Did you piss yourself? - No, I did not piss myself, 00:57:21.927 --> 00:57:23.427 - Looks like you did, - Well, I didn't, 00:57:23.427 --> 00:57:25.527 It was that maniac downstairs, 00:57:25.627 --> 00:57:28.227 We gotta stop him before he tears this house apart, 00:57:28.327 --> 00:57:31.427 You know what you gotta do? Give him one of these little babies, 00:57:31.527 --> 00:57:32.727 - What's that? - It's a sleeping pill, 00:57:32.827 --> 00:57:36.627 I got 'em from Speed, Here, So strong, so be careful, 00:57:36.727 --> 00:57:38.727 - It's powerful stuff, - Here, Just one, 00:57:38.827 --> 00:57:42.427 Be careful, 00:57:45.927 --> 00:57:47.927 Hey, Excuse me, 00:57:48.027 --> 00:57:51.627 You know, I just wanted to apologize for pulling that gun on you earlier, 00:57:51.627 --> 00:57:55.127 That was totally out of line, 00:57:55.127 --> 00:57:57.627 Hey, you know, I don't even know your name, 00:57:57.627 --> 00:58:00.927 - I'm TJ, - TJ? That's nice, 00:58:00.927 --> 00:58:06.527 I guess maybe I was out of line by pissing all over everything, 00:58:06.627 --> 00:58:11.227 Man... that was funny, (laughs)) 00:58:11.327 --> 00:58:15.927 Yeah, I've always enjoyed a good prank, What are you drinking there? 00:58:16.027 --> 00:58:18.227 Whiskey, You want some? 00:58:18.327 --> 00:58:19.727 There's plenty of booze around here, that's for sure, 00:58:19.827 --> 00:58:22.427 Yeah, I'll take a shot of bourbon, 00:58:22.527 --> 00:58:25.527 - Oh, my God! Wow! - What? 00:58:25.627 --> 00:58:27.627 Whoa! Look at those two blondes going at... 00:58:27.727 --> 00:58:29.527 - Oh, wait, are there three of them? - Where? 00:58:29.627 --> 00:58:32.527 They're going at it right up there on the second floor, 00:58:32.627 --> 00:58:38.427 - Where are you looking? - Right th... uh... Oh, man, they left, 00:58:38.427 --> 00:58:40.027 (chuckles)) 00:58:40.127 --> 00:58:44.327 Damn, I was all psyched up for some action, 00:58:44.327 --> 00:58:47.627 Lesbians are very special, 00:58:47.727 --> 00:58:51.127 Oh... Hey, I'll drink to that, huh? 00:58:52.327 --> 00:58:55.327 - Cheers, - All right, 00:58:55.427 --> 00:58:57.727 Mmm, 00:58:59.227 --> 00:59:00.527 - (grunts)) - Oh, are you... 00:59:00.527 --> 00:59:03.227 - Whoa, - Here, Why don't I... 00:59:03.327 --> 00:59:07.827 - (glass breaks)) - Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa, 00:59:07.927 --> 00:59:09.927 (steps on glass)) 00:59:12.527 --> 00:59:15.527 - Whoa, - (gong)) 00:59:19.427 --> 00:59:23.327 - Audrey? - (babbling)) 00:59:23.427 --> 00:59:26.727 Audrey! 00:59:26.727 --> 00:59:31.127 (gasps)) Oh, my God! He's like a human vibrator, 00:59:31.227 --> 00:59:33.427 What... All right, what is wrong with him? 00:59:33.527 --> 00:59:36.027 - I don't know, Did you slip him the pill? - Yes, 00:59:36.027 --> 00:59:37.027 Then that must be it then, 00:59:37.127 --> 00:59:39.027 You didn't give him the pill with whiskey, did you? 00:59:39.027 --> 00:59:41.027 - Yeah, - Oh, no! 00:59:41.127 --> 00:59:44.727 - You're not supposed to mix the two, - Audrey, you did not tell me that! 00:59:44.827 --> 00:59:47.327 Everyone knows that you're not supposed to mix booze with pills! 00:59:47.427 --> 00:59:50.327 - Come on! - OK, Is he gonna be OK? 00:59:50.427 --> 00:59:53.327 Don't worry, He'll be fine, I used to be a paramedic, 00:59:53.427 --> 00:59:57.227 - Tom? I think I found OJ, - OJ? I don't care about... 00:59:57.327 --> 01:00:00.027 We have a situation here, Audrey, call 911! 01:00:00.127 --> 01:00:02.927 - I'm telling ya, he'll be fine, - Are you sure? 01:00:03.027 --> 01:00:06.327 - He just needs some rest, I'm positive, - OK, You watch TJ, Use this, 01:00:06.427 --> 01:00:09.127 It's not loaded, but he doesn't know that, 01:00:09.227 --> 01:00:10.727 - (doorbell) - Oh, man! 01:00:12.627 --> 01:00:15.427 - Oh, hey, - Julie, 01:00:15.427 --> 01:00:17.727 - From... yeah, - Down the block, That's right, 01:00:17.827 --> 01:00:18.927 You mind if I come in? 01:00:18.927 --> 01:00:20.127 (Audrey)) All right, You grab his ankles... 01:00:20.227 --> 01:00:22.227 Why don't we go to that room over there? 01:00:22.327 --> 01:00:25.927 - (Speed) OK, yeah, I got this end, - (Audrey)) Man, he's heavy, 01:00:25.927 --> 01:00:30.327 Do you mind if I sit down? 01:00:30.327 --> 01:00:34.527 - Uh... yeah, Sure, - Thank you, 01:00:38.327 --> 01:00:41.727 Oh, hey, Sorry to butt in, Hi, I'm Red, 01:00:41.827 --> 01:00:44.127 - Hi, it's nice to meet you, - Nice to meet ya, 01:00:44.227 --> 01:00:47.727 Anyway, I realized you were telling the truth when my real date showed up, 01:00:47.827 --> 01:00:52.327 - Of course he didn't stick around, - Well, that guy is a bum, 01:00:52.427 --> 01:00:54.427 Well, I'm sure that had nothing to do with you, 01:00:54.527 --> 01:00:55.927 No, I know it did, 01:00:55.927 --> 01:00:59.727 I've never had any guys attracted to me, even before the accident, 01:00:59.827 --> 01:01:01.927 Now that cannot be true, 01:01:02.027 --> 01:01:05.427 Well... about six months ago, I was hitchhiking 01:01:05.527 --> 01:01:08.527 and a trucker tried to rape me, but other than that... 01:01:08.627 --> 01:01:12.027 Come on, You're gonna tell me, you never had a real boyfriend? 01:01:12.127 --> 01:01:16.027 Well, once, but I think he just felt sorry for me, 01:01:16.127 --> 01:01:19.327 Oh, well, uh... how long did that last? 01:01:19.427 --> 01:01:23.827 Um... about six years and then one day, he just left, 01:01:23.827 --> 01:01:27.727 - Another woman? - No, He got hit by a bus, 01:01:27.827 --> 01:01:29.427 (Red) Well, see that's not your fault, 01:01:29.427 --> 01:01:31.927 Well, he didn't seem to try very hard to avoid the bus, 01:01:31.927 --> 01:01:34.527 I think he just wanted out of the relationship, 01:01:34.627 --> 01:01:37.227 Julie, why don't you sit in this chair? 01:01:37.227 --> 01:01:39.627 Oh, geez, I'm starting to feel a bit woozy, 01:01:39.727 --> 01:01:41.827 (blood squishes)) 01:01:41.927 --> 01:01:45.127 OK, All right, I have to go find OJ, 01:01:45.227 --> 01:01:49.727 So, Red, if you could watch things for me, that'd be great, 01:01:49.827 --> 01:01:52.927 Got ya, 01:01:56.127 --> 01:01:59.627 Look, I think you're being way too hard on yourself, 01:01:59.727 --> 01:02:03.927 I mean, besides, I bet there've been a lot of guys who've been attracted to you, 01:02:04.027 --> 01:02:06.627 No, he was the only one, 01:02:06.727 --> 01:02:10.427 What about that trucker? I mean, he was obviously attracted to you, 01:02:10.427 --> 01:02:13.427 (sighs)) I think the trucker probably would have raped anyone, 01:02:13.427 --> 01:02:17.227 I doubt that, You were probably pretty special to him, 01:02:17.227 --> 01:02:19.427 (chuckles)) So sweet of you, Red, 01:02:19.527 --> 01:02:22.727 I'm not just jerking your chain either, I mean it, 01:02:22.727 --> 01:02:25.627 - (giggles)) - Yeah, (chuckles)) 01:02:29.227 --> 01:02:34.427 - What are you doing to the lawn? - It's OK, Tom, We just had to bury TJ, 01:02:34.527 --> 01:02:38.227 Bury... what? You mean, he's... 01:02:39.227 --> 01:02:42.327 You said he was gonna be OK! I thought you were a paramedic, 01:02:42.427 --> 01:02:45.827 - Well, I took a course, - You took... you-you guy... 01:02:45.927 --> 01:02:47.827 You can't just bury him, you guys! 01:02:47.927 --> 01:02:49.727 Well, we're not gonna put him in my car, 01:02:49.827 --> 01:02:53.327 - (Audrey)) That's right, - All right, Forget it, I'm calling 91 1 , 01:02:53.427 --> 01:02:56.227 - That's for emergencies, - What do you think this is? 01:02:56.227 --> 01:02:59.427 The guy's dead, In 20 minutes, he's still gonna be dead, 01:02:59.427 --> 01:03:01.927 - There's no sense of urgency here, - (chuckles)) 01:03:01.927 --> 01:03:05.027 No, we have to call the cops and report it! 01:03:05.127 --> 01:03:10.327 - And tell 'em what? - The truth! That there was a... accident, 01:03:10.427 --> 01:03:14.827 - They might not see it that way, - Let's face it, Tom, You did kill him, 01:03:14.827 --> 01:03:18.327 - You gave me the pill, - Hey, I didn't tell you to kill nobody, OK? 01:03:18.327 --> 01:03:20.027 Well, you didn't tell me not to use the whiskey! 01:03:20.127 --> 01:03:23.227 - Well, if you'd listen to me... - You didn't say anything about whiskey! 01:03:23.327 --> 01:03:25.127 - (whistles)) - I would think you would listen to me! 01:03:25.127 --> 01:03:26.627 There's no time for blame games, 01:03:26.727 --> 01:03:29.427 Why don't you spread around some leaves? Make it look good, 01:03:29.527 --> 01:03:32.627 I am not gonna help you conceal a dead body! 01:03:32.627 --> 01:03:35.827 Hey, you know what? Don't you think we should say something? 01:03:35.927 --> 01:03:37.127 - What? - You know what? She's right, 01:03:37.227 --> 01:03:39.927 Some kind of last rites or eulogy or something like that? 01:03:40.027 --> 01:03:42.327 - I'm so screwed, - We should say something, 01:03:42.327 --> 01:03:48.927 Fine, fine, You know what? Say something, Get... just make it quick, 01:03:49.027 --> 01:03:55.027 Lord, this day we lay to rest TJ, who was, uh... 01:03:55.627 --> 01:03:57.627 - I really didn't know him, - I don't know him, 01:03:57.727 --> 01:03:59.527 I mean, Tom, you know him the best, Why don't you say something? 01:03:59.527 --> 01:04:01.027 - Me? - Yeah, 01:04:01.127 --> 01:04:05.627 All I know is that the guy was a violent, sadistic goon that was into lesbians, 01:04:05.727 --> 01:04:08.027 Amen, 01:04:08.127 --> 01:04:11.527 - Tom? - Lisa, 01:04:11.627 --> 01:04:14.327 - I can't believe you're still here, - Listen, please, 01:04:14.427 --> 01:04:15.627 You have to let me explain, 01:04:15.627 --> 01:04:19.427 Look, Tom, Tonight was just a big mistake, That's all there is to it, 01:04:19.527 --> 01:04:26.327 No, you... that... what you saw with the girls, all that was was weird timing, 01:04:26.427 --> 01:04:29.127 Red? What's Red doing here? 01:04:29.227 --> 01:04:33.227 Red? Oh, uh, Red was in the neighborhood 01:04:33.227 --> 01:04:34.727 and he-and he stopped by, 01:04:34.827 --> 01:04:38.027 But, you see, nothing really bad happened tonight, 01:04:38.027 --> 01:04:43.827 - Is he the reason OJ's gone? - No, No, uh... OJ got loose, 01:04:43.827 --> 01:04:46.427 And that's a little problem, But we're gonna find him, 01:04:46.527 --> 01:04:48.927 And we're looking for him, so... 01:04:49.027 --> 01:04:50.427 What's this? 01:04:50.527 --> 01:04:54.527 Oh, uh, Tom killed a guy and we're burying the body, 01:04:54.627 --> 01:04:56.827 - OK, that was bad, - Aah! 01:04:56.927 --> 01:05:00.027 OK, well, now you're overreacting, It's not... 01:05:00.127 --> 01:05:01.727 - Oh! - Aah! 01:05:01.827 --> 01:05:09.727 (all yelling)) 01:05:09.827 --> 01:05:11.527 All right, all right, hey, 01:05:11.627 --> 01:05:17.227 Anybody moves, there's gonna be a big hole where her brain used to be, 01:05:19.427 --> 01:05:22.627 Yeah, Go ahead, shoot, 01:05:23.527 --> 01:05:25.627 Well, what are you waiting for? Come on! 01:05:25.727 --> 01:05:27.027 What are you waiting for?! Waste the bitch! 01:05:27.127 --> 01:05:29.027 - Tom! - No, I don't give a shit! 01:05:29.127 --> 01:05:32.827 - Hey, I'm not joking, asshole, - Yeah? 01:05:32.827 --> 01:05:36.627 Pull the trigger, Come on, Come on! 01:05:38.427 --> 01:05:42.227 I think you're just all talk, 01:05:45.827 --> 01:05:48.727 Looks like we both got guns, 01:05:50.327 --> 01:05:53.227 Who's gonna shoot first this time? 01:05:56.427 --> 01:05:59.027 (chuckles)) 01:05:59.127 --> 01:06:01.327 (groans)) 01:06:01.327 --> 01:06:03.527 (Red) Well, that should do it, 01:06:03.627 --> 01:06:06.627 Tom! You are so brave, 01:06:06.627 --> 01:06:09.927 No, no, It's not even that big of a deal, This gun's not even loaded... 01:06:09.927 --> 01:06:11.127 - (gunshot) - (grunt) 01:06:11.227 --> 01:06:13.127 (man)) What the hell is going on? 01:06:13.227 --> 01:06:16.627 I never should have doubted you, You risked your life for me, 01:06:16.727 --> 01:06:19.527 Audrey found some bullets in the kitchen and I may have reloaded it, 01:06:19.627 --> 01:06:21.627 Yeah, I did, 01:06:21.727 --> 01:06:25.927 Yo, excuse me, Does anyone here know a Jack Taylor? 01:06:25.927 --> 01:06:27.327 Why? 01:06:27.427 --> 01:06:31.227 This dude just called, said if I don't pick him up at the train station in 15 minutes, 01:06:31.227 --> 01:06:34.227 I'm out of a job, What do you suppose that means? 01:06:34.327 --> 01:06:35.427 Oh, my God, 01:06:35.527 --> 01:06:37.527 That's what I thought, 'cause I ain't got no job, 01:06:37.527 --> 01:06:39.427 - He's coming home early, - OK, don't worry about it, 01:06:39.527 --> 01:06:42.627 I'll take care of everything, OK? Trust me, Just don't drive too fast, 01:06:42.627 --> 01:06:44.027 Got it, 01:06:44.027 --> 01:06:46.627 And, um, maybe you should put that away, 01:06:46.727 --> 01:06:50.127 Oh, God, 01:06:50.327 --> 01:06:52.627 (. "Go Home" by Barenaked Ladies)) 01:07:05.127 --> 01:07:07.127 Ooh, 01:07:09.727 --> 01:07:11.427 (squeaks)) 01:07:22.327 --> 01:07:25.127 (sighs)) 01:07:29.027 --> 01:07:32.027 (. whistling)) 01:07:40.727 --> 01:07:44.127 I knew that was you, 01:08:20.627 --> 01:08:22.027 (beer bottles clank) 01:09:09.627 --> 01:09:13.427 (Taylor) As long as we're in Thailand for the meeting on Monday afternoon, 01:09:13.527 --> 01:09:17.727 Yeah, We can pick it up when we refuel in Hawaii, 01:09:18.327 --> 01:09:21.227 Hey, uh, do you wanna stop and, uh, get something to drink, 01:09:21.227 --> 01:09:22.527 go to the bathroom or something? 01:09:22.627 --> 01:09:24.727 We'll take the departmental heads now 01:09:24.827 --> 01:09:28.127 and the Creative team in a couple of weeks, 01:09:28.227 --> 01:09:29.527 (squeaks)) 01:09:37.627 --> 01:09:39.727 That's the agenda up to lunch, then there's lunch... 01:09:39.827 --> 01:09:42.927 (squawking)) 01:09:48.627 --> 01:09:52.427 - OK, And then... - (squawks)) 01:09:52.527 --> 01:09:56.127 - (horns honk) - (tires screech)) 01:09:56.227 --> 01:09:59.527 OK, OK, 01:10:01.027 --> 01:10:03.327 OK, fine, 01:10:07.227 --> 01:10:12.027 - Stansfield, what are you doing? - Nothing, sir, 01:10:12.127 --> 01:10:14.827 Hold on a moment, please, 01:10:14.927 --> 01:10:19.827 Stansfield... why don't you just concentrate on the driving 01:10:19.827 --> 01:10:22.827 and let me get on with making my call, 01:10:22.827 --> 01:10:25.527 - Wait! - What is it now, Stansfield? 01:10:25.627 --> 01:10:30.027 Oh, nothing, sir, Almost home, 01:10:48.227 --> 01:10:52.527 - Hey, How'd this get in there? - Oh, be careful with that, 01:10:52.627 --> 01:10:54.527 I will, Good thing I found it, 01:10:54.527 --> 01:10:57.527 There's several ways to properly dispose of a handgun, 01:10:57.627 --> 01:11:00.127 none of which include putting it in a garbage bag, 01:11:00.127 --> 01:11:03.227 (cop over megaphone)) Freeze! Police! Freeze! 01:11:03.327 --> 01:11:05.227 Let go of the girl and put your hands in the air! 01:11:05.327 --> 01:11:07.127 You're completely surrounded, TJ! 01:11:07.127 --> 01:11:09.727 Put down your weapons and put your hands on you head! 01:11:09.727 --> 01:11:15.127 No, you guys, Wait, He's not TJ, I'm Lisa Taylor, This is my dad's house, 01:11:15.227 --> 01:11:17.127 Ma'am, we've received numerous reports 01:11:17.127 --> 01:11:18.627 from this neighborhood: theft, gunfire... 01:11:18.627 --> 01:11:22.927 All right, Look, I know you probably think we may have killed somebody, 01:11:22.927 --> 01:11:24.727 but Tom didn't know he poisoned the guy, 01:11:24.727 --> 01:11:28.727 and we thought he was dead when we buried him, But he seems OK now, 01:11:28.727 --> 01:11:32.227 His head's just a little bloody from where we hit him with the shovel, 01:11:32.227 --> 01:11:35.327 And I swear when Tom shot the gun off, he didn't think it was loaded 01:11:35.427 --> 01:11:38.827 'cause I put the bullets back in, so if you'll all just step inside, 01:11:38.827 --> 01:11:41.027 you'll see there's nobody dead here, 01:11:41.127 --> 01:11:43.027 He may have had the wind knocked out of him temporarily, 01:11:43.127 --> 01:11:45.627 but with a little first aid, I think he'll be just fine, 01:11:45.727 --> 01:11:48.227 (screaming)) 01:11:48.327 --> 01:11:50.127 (screaming)) 01:11:50.127 --> 01:11:55.427 - (screams)) - (screams)) 01:11:55.427 --> 01:11:57.527 Holy mother of God! 01:11:59.927 --> 01:12:01.327 (Lisa)) Hans! 01:12:01.427 --> 01:12:03.627 Yes, I see, I see, 01:12:03.727 --> 01:12:05.727 - (squeaks)) - OK, fine, 01:12:05.827 --> 01:12:07.027 - (squawking)) - Whoa! 01:12:07.127 --> 01:12:09.627 Could you say that again? You're breaking up! 01:12:09.727 --> 01:12:14.927 One moment, please, OJ! 01:12:15.027 --> 01:12:16.827 (tires screeching)) 01:12:24.227 --> 01:12:29.127 I just can't understand why you would do this, Hans, what were you thinking? 01:12:29.127 --> 01:12:31.527 He'll be fine, He may complain about a sore throat, 01:12:31.627 --> 01:12:34.227 but he's in a lot better shape than this chandelier, 01:12:34.327 --> 01:12:35.727 Well, I'd hate to be here when the owner gets back, 01:12:36.527 --> 01:12:38.627 You can say that again, 01:12:38.727 --> 01:12:40.227 - (man)) Whoa! - (car horn)) 01:12:42.827 --> 01:12:44.227 - Tom! Daddy! - What do we got? 01:12:44.227 --> 01:12:46.427 - What was that? - Watch the glass, OK, everybody? 01:12:46.527 --> 01:12:48.527 - Let's get 'em out of the car, - Oh, my God! Daddy! 01:12:48.627 --> 01:12:50.827 - Everybody, stay back and remain calm, - (Lisa)) Are you all right? 01:12:50.827 --> 01:12:53.127 That's him, That's the one spying on me through the bushes, 01:12:53.227 --> 01:12:55.327 He shot the bullet right through my Julie's bedroom window, 01:12:55.427 --> 01:12:58.527 Here, Tell 'em, Julie, 01:12:59.227 --> 01:13:01.927 You guys, Tom wants the body in here, 01:13:02.027 --> 01:13:04.527 - (TJ)) Take it easy, Put me down, - (gasps)) 01:13:05.827 --> 01:13:09.327 Stansfield, what have you done? 01:13:09.427 --> 01:13:13.027 Lisa, pack your things, You're coming with me to Thailand, 01:13:14.427 --> 01:13:17.527 No! 01:13:19.927 --> 01:13:22.327 Get his ass out of here, 01:13:22.427 --> 01:13:26.427 It's funny you should mention the word "ass", Jack, 01:13:26.427 --> 01:13:29.527 Why don't we start by talking about yours, 01:13:29.527 --> 01:13:30.527 Excuse me? 01:13:30.627 --> 01:13:34.727 Lisa, your father is not who you think he is, 01:13:34.727 --> 01:13:39.527 The whole publishing operation, It's a great cover, 01:13:39.527 --> 01:13:43.527 Now how'd you do it? What'd you do? Did you hollow out the books? 01:13:43.527 --> 01:13:48.027 Oh, and locating the plant in Thailand, It's genius! 01:13:49.327 --> 01:13:53.327 - What are you talking about? - What am l... Jack, 01:13:53.427 --> 01:13:58.127 You know, I-I would've believed you, Jack... until I met this man, 01:13:58.227 --> 01:14:00.427 who seems to know a lot about ya, 01:14:02.327 --> 01:14:07.727 Recognize this? I hear it's very effective in relieving folliculitis, 01:14:07.827 --> 01:14:11.027 I don't have folliculitis, 01:14:11.027 --> 01:14:14.727 He's given me no choice, 01:14:14.727 --> 01:14:16.627 - He's given me no choice! - Tom, what are you doing? 01:14:16.727 --> 01:14:19.427 - This is insane! - Yeah? Take a look at your dad's ass, 01:14:19.427 --> 01:14:21.227 - No! - Then tell me I'm insane, huh? 01:14:21.327 --> 01:14:25.827 - (all) Oh! Ooh! - Huh? Huh? Look at it! 01:14:25.827 --> 01:14:28.427 Look at it! Huh? Huh? 01:14:28.527 --> 01:14:30.427 - Ooh... - What? 01:14:35.227 --> 01:14:37.227 (man)) Oh, that's nasty, 01:14:42.627 --> 01:14:48.127 I told you I don't have folliculitis, you blithering idiot, 01:14:48.227 --> 01:14:53.927 Well, guys, the ointment must have worked, 01:14:54.027 --> 01:14:56.127 Let's go, 01:14:56.227 --> 01:15:00.527 Wait! I have something to show ya, 01:15:02.327 --> 01:15:04.527 (all) Oh! 01:15:04.527 --> 01:15:05.827 (Hans)) What's with this movie and the ass cheeks? 01:15:05.827 --> 01:15:11.127 My real name is Jack Taylor... Jr, Red is my nickname, 01:15:11.227 --> 01:15:15.127 Now you know why, I'm the whole reason that TJ's here, 01:15:15.227 --> 01:15:19.327 Goddamn it, Red, You've been dealing drugs out of my house! 01:15:19.427 --> 01:15:23.427 No, Dad, I swear, I gave this guy a bag of flour, 01:15:23.527 --> 01:15:26.827 I dumped a kilo of the real stuff down the toilet, 01:15:26.927 --> 01:15:29.027 I'm finished dealing for good, 01:15:29.127 --> 01:15:32.227 The lime green toilet with the wooden seat? 01:15:33.027 --> 01:15:35.427 - Yeah, why? - (squawking)) 01:15:35.527 --> 01:15:46.327 (all) Ooh! 01:15:46.327 --> 01:15:48.027 (all) Whoa! 01:15:48.027 --> 01:15:52.827 Wait a second, He's flying, 01:15:52.827 --> 01:15:55.727 He's flying, 01:15:59.627 --> 01:16:01.927 (squawking)) 01:16:03.327 --> 01:16:06.527 (all) Whoa! 01:16:09.527 --> 01:16:10.727 - (OJ squeals)) - (car horn)) 01:16:10.827 --> 01:16:14.327 - (tires screeching)) - (crash)) 01:16:15.327 --> 01:16:21.027 Get him out of my sight, Now, Lisa, let's go, 01:16:23.227 --> 01:16:25.827 That's the one, He got my ear! Evander Holyfield's ear, 01:16:25.927 --> 01:16:28.627 You have to right to remain silent, Anything you say can and... 01:16:28.727 --> 01:16:30.527 Lisa, wait! 01:16:30.627 --> 01:16:33.327 (Arthur) That's Holyfield's ear for God's sake, 01:16:33.427 --> 01:16:36.327 (thunder rolling)) 01:16:53.827 --> 01:16:57.627 - (squawking)) - OJ? 01:16:59.227 --> 01:17:04.527 OJ! Come to Daddy, How's my little boy? 01:17:06.627 --> 01:17:09.827 (squawking)) 01:17:17.827 --> 01:17:24.427 - You're going with him? - What choice do I have? He needs me, 01:17:24.427 --> 01:17:27.127 Are you actually feeling sorry for him? 01:17:27.127 --> 01:17:30.727 He's manipulating you and you are buying it, 01:17:31.627 --> 01:17:35.427 All right, fine, You do what you gotta do, I am gonna bail Tom out of jail, 01:17:35.527 --> 01:17:36.627 With what? Your drug money? 01:17:36.727 --> 01:17:38.727 No, no, no, I stole this out of Dad's safe, 01:17:38.827 --> 01:17:41.827 Look, the important thing is, somebody has gotta help Tom, 01:17:41.927 --> 01:17:45.627 You know that nothing that happened here last night was any of his fault, 01:17:45.627 --> 01:17:50.127 It's funny, The nicest guy in the world's the only one with enough balls 01:17:50.227 --> 01:17:52.527 to stand up to Dad, 01:17:55.827 --> 01:18:00.127 All he wanted to do was to spend some time with you, 01:18:00.127 --> 01:18:02.327 Look what it gets him, 01:18:02.427 --> 01:18:07.227 Classic Dad, I'm not allowed in the house, you're not allowed out of it, 01:18:07.327 --> 01:18:10.727 He doesn't care about us, Only that stupid bird, 01:18:12.127 --> 01:18:15.827 - Hey, Red, can I tell you something? - Sure, 01:18:15.927 --> 01:18:20.427 I know this is gonna sound weird, but ever since I was a little kid... 01:18:22.627 --> 01:18:27.427 I used to always wish that I was that stupid bird, 01:18:28.627 --> 01:18:30.427 Aw, 01:18:30.527 --> 01:18:34.027 (squawks)) 01:18:37.627 --> 01:18:41.127 Look, I think it's about time you talk to Dad, 01:18:41.227 --> 01:18:45.027 At least tell him how you feel, You can do it, 01:18:45.027 --> 01:18:46.427 (grunts)) 01:18:46.527 --> 01:18:49.427 (yells)) 01:18:49.427 --> 01:18:53.127 Don't you see, we have no reason to be afraid of him? 01:18:53.227 --> 01:18:55.327 - Aah! - (screaming)) 01:18:55.427 --> 01:18:57.327 Aah! 01:18:58.627 --> 01:19:06.027 (grunting)) Aah! 01:19:06.027 --> 01:19:07.227 - (yells)) - (thud) 01:19:07.227 --> 01:19:12.027 - Daddy! - Lisa, don't let him do this to you, 01:19:12.127 --> 01:19:16.327 Lisa! Aah! 01:19:36.827 --> 01:19:40.027 - Lisa! - Tom! 01:19:40.127 --> 01:19:43.827 Red bailed me out... and told me you were here and I'm not letting you go, 01:19:43.927 --> 01:19:46.427 - Yeah, but I'm... - No, You're gonna let me finish, 01:19:46.527 --> 01:19:49.927 I went through hell last night and it was my fault 'cause I let people do it to me, 01:19:50.027 --> 01:19:51.727 And now you're gonna make the same mistake, 01:19:51.827 --> 01:19:53.527 - Yeah, but... - This isn't what you want, 01:19:53.627 --> 01:19:56.627 This is what your father wants, And you know what? 01:19:56.727 --> 01:20:02.827 Maybe you and l... never are gonna work, And that hurts, 01:20:02.827 --> 01:20:07.127 But not as much as watching you be controlled by a ruthless tyrant 01:20:07.127 --> 01:20:09.727 that would screw his own mother if he thought it'd help him get ahead... 01:20:09.827 --> 01:20:21.227 Tom! I'm not going, 01:20:21.327 --> 01:20:23.327 She's-she's not going, 01:20:26.527 --> 01:20:30.527 Is this whole concept too complicated for you, Stansfield? 01:20:40.827 --> 01:20:44.927 No, No, 01:20:45.027 --> 01:20:47.627 All right, (chuckles)) 01:20:47.727 --> 01:20:51.027 Wha... I... What made you stay? 01:20:59.127 --> 01:21:01.127 That, 01:21:07.927 --> 01:21:13.927 - How did you guys... - We finally had our long overdue talk, 01:21:14.727 --> 01:21:17.627 Then-then who's taking your place in Thailand? 01:21:17.727 --> 01:21:19.327 - He is, - (gong)) 01:21:19.427 --> 01:21:20.727 - What's this? - (neck cracks)) Ow! 01:21:20.827 --> 01:21:24.027 - I'm kidding, - I don't wanna go, I'm afraid, 01:21:24.127 --> 01:21:27.127 Nonsense, Everyone knows that, uh... 01:21:27.227 --> 01:21:30.527 Asian people are very intimidated by, uh... 01:21:30.627 --> 01:21:32.627 - Tall men? - Canadians? 01:21:32.727 --> 01:21:35.427 - Republicans? - Blacks? 01:21:35.527 --> 01:21:37.327 - Henderson? - Yes, sir, 01:21:37.427 --> 01:21:39.127 I won't have that kind of thinking in this company, 01:21:39.127 --> 01:21:42.027 There's no room for racism here, You're fired, 01:21:42.127 --> 01:21:46.827 Now, Tom, the point that I'm getting to is that with a big part of the team away, 01:21:46.927 --> 01:21:49.727 I'm gonna want you to take over the Creative Department, 01:21:49.727 --> 01:21:52.027 - Me? - No need to be modest, 01:21:52.027 --> 01:21:55.127 I saw those ideas you left in the living room, 01:21:55.227 --> 01:22:00.027 Your theory on the JFK thing, brilliant, And the moon landing, a hoax? 01:22:00.027 --> 01:22:02.127 You're really on to something there, 01:22:02.227 --> 01:22:06.227 That's the kind of thinking that's gonna sell books, 01:22:06.327 --> 01:22:10.227 Uh, thank you, sir, 01:22:10.327 --> 01:22:13.927 Bye, Daddy, Have a safe flight, 01:22:17.427 --> 01:22:21.927 Well, Dad... that's fantastic, You promoted Tom, 01:22:22.027 --> 01:22:25.527 Yeah, well, I figure anyone who's got the guts to piss on my Persian carpet 01:22:25.627 --> 01:22:30.427 has gotta have what it takes, Stansfield! 01:22:30.427 --> 01:22:33.827 (trickling)) 01:22:35.827 --> 01:22:41.127 - What the hell are you doing? - Just trying to get my job back, sir, 01:22:41.227 --> 01:22:43.227 (. "If I Had $ 1000000" by Barenaked Ladies)) 01:22:43.327 --> 01:22:46.027 - (Lisa squeals)) - (chuckles)) 01:22:46.127 --> 01:22:50.127 (Tom)) You know, after everything that happened, after all I went through, 01:22:50.127 --> 01:22:54.127 I guess it was my lucky day. And I'm not the only one. 01:22:54.127 --> 01:22:56.227 Based on Lisa and Red's suggestions, 01:22:56.327 --> 01:22:58.927 Jack restructured the company from top to bottom. 01:22:58.927 --> 01:23:02.627 Even instituting casual Fridays every day. 01:23:02.627 --> 01:23:05.927 And last Friday was Henderson's 27th straight day on the job 01:23:05.927 --> 01:23:07.427 without being fired. 01:23:07.527 --> 01:23:10.527 OJ's back off the drugs and now he only drinks beer. 01:23:10.627 --> 01:23:12.627 (burps)) 01:23:12.627 --> 01:23:15.327 (chuckles)) But he still has an occasional flashback. 01:23:15.427 --> 01:23:17.927 (squawks)) 01:23:18.027 --> 01:23:20.527 Jack begged Audrey to come back, but she got a job 01:23:20.527 --> 01:23:22.527 at, of all places, a coffee shop. 01:23:22.627 --> 01:23:24.927 - Ew! - Ugh! 01:23:26.727 --> 01:23:28.727 - Ew! - Ew! 01:23:28.827 --> 01:23:31.627 This is terrible! 01:23:31.627 --> 01:23:35.327 Hans succeeded in turning around the company's factory in Thailand. 01:23:35.327 --> 01:23:37.827 But apparently he's still struggling to cope with the local customs. 01:23:37.927 --> 01:23:40.327 - Back of bus! - Excuse me? 01:23:40.327 --> 01:23:43.727 - You people belong back of bus, - That's an outrage! 01:23:43.827 --> 01:23:46.727 Man, I'm not gonna let you treat me like that merely because I'm... 01:23:46.727 --> 01:23:49.627 Smoking! Smokers belong back of bus! 01:23:49.727 --> 01:23:52.627 (coughing)) 01:23:52.727 --> 01:23:54.927 As for me, with my new promotion, 01:23:55.027 --> 01:23:58.027 I could at last write books based on my own experiences. 01:23:58.027 --> 01:23:59.527 - So I did. - Thank you, 01:23:59.527 --> 01:24:03.327 And Lisa was finally able to pursue a career that she loved. 01:24:03.427 --> 01:24:06.227 You know, you ever heard someone say that old expression.: 01:24:06.327 --> 01:24:09.527 "Why does everything bad always happen to me?" 01:24:09.627 --> 01:24:13.627 Well, I don't get those people... 'cause I've learned that if they just stop 01:24:13.627 --> 01:24:20.427 and look around, they'd realize that everything happens for a reason. 01:24:20.451 --> 01:24:40.451 Telegram Channel and Instagram Page .:: @bollbolljan_com ::.