WEBVTT 00:04.984 --> 00:06.944 [Velma] Previously on Velma... 00:07.027 --> 00:09.947 I'm sorry I didn't believe you about your hallucinations. 00:10.030 --> 00:11.741 But, Velma, I told you this. 00:11.824 --> 00:14.869 Your mother didn't go missing because you solved a mystery. 00:14.952 --> 00:15.828 She left us. 00:15.911 --> 00:17.246 La, la, la, la, la, la, la! 00:17.329 --> 00:18.998 Be in my office Monday morning. 00:19.081 --> 00:23.002 I'll tell you everything I know about my mom, Dr. Edna Perdue. 00:23.085 --> 00:24.295 That book you gave me 00:24.378 --> 00:25.921 opened my eyes to your inner beauty. 00:26.005 --> 00:26.881 Wait. Really? 00:28.674 --> 00:29.592 Brenda? 00:30.843 --> 00:32.219 [all screaming] 00:32.303 --> 00:34.972 I'm your mother, Carroll. 00:35.055 --> 00:37.767 And I'm your father, Darren. 00:39.059 --> 00:41.145 -[bats screeching] -[screams] 00:48.778 --> 00:51.322 [Velma] If there's one thing teen dramas get right, 00:51.405 --> 00:54.074 it's that nothing is ever actually a teenager's fault. 00:54.158 --> 00:57.369 We're all really just paying for the sins of our parents. 00:57.453 --> 00:59.163 They're either lying to us... 00:59.246 --> 01:01.081 [gasps] 01:01.165 --> 01:03.959 [in seductive voice] Oh, yeah, you discover that polonium, Marie Curie. 01:04.043 --> 01:05.377 [Velma] ...or trying to change us... 01:05.461 --> 01:07.505 [William] Ugh! 01:07.588 --> 01:10.174 [Velma] ...or hiding some dark family secret. 01:10.257 --> 01:11.509 Mom! 01:11.592 --> 01:12.885 If Velma hallucinates while learning the truth 01:12.968 --> 01:14.595 about Grandma, she could die. 01:14.678 --> 01:16.889 Let the adults handle this, son. [voice quivering] Blythe? 01:16.972 --> 01:21.268 [Velma] But when it comes to truly crappy parents, no one beats my dad. 01:21.352 --> 01:23.187 Dad, I need to get to school early 01:23.270 --> 01:24.730 to talk to Principal Rogers. 01:24.814 --> 01:26.690 She might have clues about Mom's kidnapping. 01:26.774 --> 01:28.150 [Aman] That's great. 01:28.234 --> 01:29.777 Really? But you hate that I think she's missing. 01:29.860 --> 01:32.154 Are you kidding? That's even better, Sophie. 01:32.238 --> 01:33.864 -[camera shutter clicking] -Uh, what's happening? 01:33.948 --> 01:35.533 People only wear fleece 01:35.616 --> 01:37.451 when they're looking for startup money, or... [gasps] 01:37.535 --> 01:38.953 Oh, no. Going hiking. 01:39.036 --> 01:41.664 What's happening is I'm taking paternity leave. 01:41.747 --> 01:42.998 Paternity leave? 01:43.082 --> 01:44.708 When I was born, you doubled your work hours. 01:44.792 --> 01:47.962 We know, but Amanda's birth has made your father realize 01:48.045 --> 01:50.631 he needs to find a work-life balance, 01:50.714 --> 01:53.384 or risk messing her up the way he messed up-- 01:53.467 --> 01:55.803 -Well, you know. -Mmm. 01:55.886 --> 01:57.972 [theme music playing] 02:00.808 --> 02:02.601 Hey, Velma, want a ride to school? 02:02.685 --> 02:05.729 We got champagne, AC, and the driver has a funny story 02:05.813 --> 02:07.773 about how he survived the Khmer Rouge. 02:07.857 --> 02:09.483 Uh, sure, thanks. 02:09.567 --> 02:11.694 Absolutely not, Frederick. 02:11.777 --> 02:14.655 Unless this is your selection for our hunt? 02:14.738 --> 02:16.407 No, Father. I like her now. 02:16.490 --> 02:18.409 Have you heard of inner beauty? 02:18.492 --> 02:20.286 That's a myth, you fool! 02:20.369 --> 02:21.954 [tires screeching] 02:22.037 --> 02:24.081 Well, at least my relationship with my father isn't that bad. 02:24.164 --> 02:26.542 [all singing] ♪ Just the three of us... ♪ 02:26.625 --> 02:27.459 Ugh! 02:27.543 --> 02:28.961 Grr. 02:29.044 --> 02:30.004 [school bell ringing] 02:30.087 --> 02:31.380 Principal Rogers, I just want 02:31.463 --> 02:32.631 -to say thank you for-- -[kissing sounds] 02:32.715 --> 02:33.632 Hey, do you mind? 02:33.716 --> 02:34.925 [Gigi] Oh, yeah, mmm. 02:35.009 --> 02:37.469 All right. Go help Velma not hallucinate 02:37.553 --> 02:39.096 while she talks to your mom. 02:39.179 --> 02:41.849 But don't let her push you around. You're your own man. 02:41.932 --> 02:42.933 Damn straight. 02:43.017 --> 02:44.435 And just real quick, 02:44.518 --> 02:45.936 when do you need me to have your pants mended by? 02:46.020 --> 02:47.021 Ugh. Now. 02:47.104 --> 02:48.981 But lunch will be fine, I guess. 02:49.064 --> 02:52.359 As I was saying, thank you for agreeing to talk to me 02:52.443 --> 02:54.069 about your mad scientist mother. 02:54.153 --> 02:55.905 -Now spill it! -[sighs] 02:55.988 --> 03:00.284 Okay. Well, buckle up, because things are about to get weird. 03:00.367 --> 03:01.952 See, in the 1970s, 03:02.036 --> 03:06.332 my mother, Dr. Edna Perdue, was a brilliant neurosurgeon, 03:06.415 --> 03:08.042 who had discovered a way 03:08.125 --> 03:10.711 to keep the human brain alive outside of the body. 03:10.794 --> 03:13.797 [brain] I never should have been an organ donor. 03:13.881 --> 03:15.674 -[all gasping] -A woman scientist? 03:15.758 --> 03:17.301 [Principal Rogers] Her work caught the attention 03:17.384 --> 03:19.845 of Army General Harry Meeting, who felt 03:19.929 --> 03:22.348 he could use it to spy on what he believed 03:22.431 --> 03:25.559 to be the biggest threat to the American way of life. 03:25.643 --> 03:28.729 Oh, let me guess. Communists? Meat made from plants? 03:28.812 --> 03:30.272 -Women's sports? -No! 03:30.356 --> 03:32.274 Meddling kids. 03:32.358 --> 03:35.653 It was the 1970s, and according to General Meeting, 03:35.736 --> 03:38.113 meddling kids were ruining everything. 03:38.197 --> 03:40.491 War's not, like, cool, man. 03:40.574 --> 03:43.994 [Principal Rogers] General Meeting had tried to infiltrate these groups. 03:44.078 --> 03:46.914 But what if war is, like, cool, man? 03:46.997 --> 03:48.958 [Principal Rogers] But the meddling kids 03:49.041 --> 03:52.878 always foiled him with a technique called mask pulling. 03:52.962 --> 03:55.839 So, General Meeting tried to infiltrate them 03:55.923 --> 03:57.675 through hypnosis. 03:57.758 --> 04:00.928 But this only worked so long as no one ever... 04:01.011 --> 04:02.513 -[groovy music playing] -[snapping fingers] 04:02.596 --> 04:04.390 [Principal Rogers] ...snapped their fingers. 04:06.517 --> 04:09.812 So, when General Meeting saw my mother's work, he wondered, 04:09.895 --> 04:11.772 what if she could put a soldier's brain 04:11.855 --> 04:14.024 into the head of a meddling kid? 04:14.108 --> 04:18.320 He called the program the Special Covert Operations Brain Initiative, 04:18.404 --> 04:20.572 or SCOOBI. 04:20.656 --> 04:23.075 SCOOBI? And wait, what did SCOOBI do? 04:23.158 --> 04:25.995 It attempted to create the perfect spy, 04:26.078 --> 04:28.372 by swapping people's brains. 04:28.455 --> 04:29.957 Oh. Did it work? 04:30.040 --> 04:32.167 [Principal Rogers] No. 04:32.251 --> 04:35.379 And as the years dragged on, and the pressure to produce a result grew, 04:36.839 --> 04:40.342 she slowly went insane. 04:40.426 --> 04:42.219 Until one day, my mom 04:42.302 --> 04:44.555 bricked up her secret lab in our basement, 04:44.638 --> 04:48.017 hid her journals so no one could recreate her work, 04:48.100 --> 04:51.895 and was committed to the Crystal Cove Insane Asylum. 04:53.480 --> 04:56.233 Wow, I can't believe that's your mom. I mean, 04:56.316 --> 04:58.736 playing God, removing brains. 04:58.819 --> 05:00.154 That's some white people shit. 05:00.237 --> 05:01.780 She was always a trailblazer. 05:01.864 --> 05:03.615 But wait, my mom disappeared 05:03.699 --> 05:05.576 after finding Dr. Perdue's journals, 05:05.659 --> 05:08.662 and the dead girls all had their brains removed. 05:08.746 --> 05:09.955 Could they be connected? 05:10.039 --> 05:11.790 Wow. For all your personality flaws, 05:11.874 --> 05:13.751 you're actually a pretty good detective. 05:13.834 --> 05:16.670 If there is a connection between your mom and the dead girls, 05:16.754 --> 05:20.215 the key to finding it is in this box. 05:21.592 --> 05:22.634 -[roaring] -[Velma screams] 05:28.140 --> 05:30.809 You're late, Daphne. Are you rebelling already? 05:30.893 --> 05:33.937 As a criminal, I like it. As your dad, knock it off. 05:34.021 --> 05:37.608 Sorry, to get past my moms, I had to put on their wedding DVD. 05:37.691 --> 05:40.694 They'll spend all day arguing about who let Uncle Lou dance 05:40.778 --> 05:42.404 when they knew he had a heart condition. 05:42.488 --> 05:43.655 What's all this? 05:43.739 --> 05:45.365 -Uh, that... -[whispering] Remember, 05:45.449 --> 05:47.576 not a word about why we really need her 05:47.659 --> 05:49.244 until we know we can trust her. 05:51.205 --> 05:52.956 [gasps] What happened? 05:53.040 --> 05:54.833 Why is there a needle in my good boob? 05:54.917 --> 05:56.168 It's an adrenaline shot. 05:56.251 --> 05:57.795 Your heart stopped from a hallucination. 05:57.878 --> 05:59.463 Norville, why didn't you make me laugh? 05:59.546 --> 06:02.549 I tried. I did three minutes of hilarious new stuff. 06:02.633 --> 06:03.967 You just didn't get the references 06:04.051 --> 06:05.552 because you haven't taken calculus yet. 06:05.636 --> 06:07.054 Velma, I'm sorry, 06:07.137 --> 06:09.556 but I'm not telling you anything more about your mom 06:09.640 --> 06:11.308 until you stop your hallucinations. 06:11.391 --> 06:13.769 The nurse only has one adrenaline shot left, 06:13.852 --> 06:15.646 and I want shrimp for lunch. 06:15.729 --> 06:17.523 Allergies be damned! 06:17.606 --> 06:20.150 But if you think my mom is connected to the serial killer in any way, 06:20.234 --> 06:21.193 I have to know. 06:21.276 --> 06:22.319 Please. 06:22.402 --> 06:24.780 [sighs] Fine. Velma, your mom-- 06:24.863 --> 06:25.948 -[roaring] -[screams] 06:26.907 --> 06:28.158 Norville, what am I gonna do? 06:28.242 --> 06:29.993 I hallucinate because I feel guilty 06:30.077 --> 06:32.162 about having caused my mom to disappear. 06:32.246 --> 06:34.081 The only cure is to find my mom. 06:34.164 --> 06:36.375 Though, I have heard some good things about alcoholism. 06:36.458 --> 06:39.670 Okay, well, uh, when was the first time you hallucinated? 06:39.753 --> 06:42.589 Hmm. It was a few days after my mom went missing. 06:42.673 --> 06:45.259 [demonic voice] This is all your fault, Velma. 06:45.342 --> 06:46.802 Why'd you have to go 06:46.885 --> 06:49.304 -and solve your own mystery? -[screaming] 06:51.098 --> 06:54.601 Okay, but you'd been trying to find your mom before that, right? 06:54.685 --> 06:57.146 Why didn't the hallucinations start until then? 06:57.229 --> 06:58.480 As a man analyzing a woman, 06:58.564 --> 07:00.023 -can we assume menses? -No. 07:00.107 --> 07:02.776 But wait, something else did happen that day. 07:02.860 --> 07:06.655 My dad took me out to breakfast for the first time ever. 07:06.738 --> 07:08.407 Hey, Dad. Great news. 07:08.490 --> 07:10.450 I've been looking for Mom, and I think I have some new leads-- 07:10.534 --> 07:14.663 Velma, stop! For the last time, your mother wasn't taken. 07:14.746 --> 07:15.873 She left us. 07:15.956 --> 07:17.541 Now, see if you can solve the case 07:17.624 --> 07:21.128 of how to entertain yourself while I make work calls. 07:21.211 --> 07:23.589 Wait, I've always wanted my dad to love me more. 07:23.672 --> 07:26.216 Maybe the hallucinations are my subconscious 07:26.300 --> 07:28.051 keeping me from looking for my mom. 07:28.135 --> 07:30.554 Because you saying your mom was kidnapped upsets your dad 07:30.637 --> 07:32.389 and just makes it harder for him to love you. 07:32.472 --> 07:33.932 Exactly! [gasps] Wait! 07:34.016 --> 07:38.020 Oh, no, I hallucinate because I have daddy issues. 07:38.103 --> 07:38.979 Gross. 07:40.314 --> 07:41.899 Okay, so, don't search for 07:41.982 --> 07:44.526 "Daddy issues and teenage girls." 07:44.610 --> 07:46.111 And bookmark. [clicks] 07:46.195 --> 07:47.905 But if your hallucinations started 07:47.988 --> 07:49.823 because your dad doesn't believe your mom was kidnapped, 07:49.907 --> 07:52.242 maybe they'd stop if you make him believe she was kidnapped. 07:52.326 --> 07:54.912 I tried, but whenever I mention it, he shuts me down. 07:54.995 --> 07:56.872 Then I have to eat a whole pie to feel better, 07:56.955 --> 07:58.749 and I will die before I give that up. 07:58.832 --> 08:00.584 What's another way to cure daddy issues? 08:00.667 --> 08:01.793 Eh, I wouldn't know. 08:01.877 --> 08:03.295 The thought of having any issues 08:03.378 --> 08:04.755 with my own sweet, sweet daddy is foreign to me. 08:04.838 --> 08:06.381 Really? Even though he's the one 08:06.465 --> 08:08.008 who basically taught you to be a beta. 08:08.091 --> 08:11.386 Excuse me? My father is not a beta. 08:11.470 --> 08:12.763 He drives the speed limit, 08:12.846 --> 08:14.514 no matter how many people are honking at him. 08:14.598 --> 08:15.933 Knock, knock. 08:16.016 --> 08:17.935 Norville, can I grab you for a second? I need a hand 08:18.018 --> 08:19.603 -with some heavy lifting. -Of course, Dad. 08:19.686 --> 08:22.856 Because heavy lifting is exactly what alphas like us do. 08:22.940 --> 08:26.235 Thanks. We're helping your mom's old boyfriend move. 08:26.318 --> 08:27.736 Ah, that doesn't help. 08:28.862 --> 08:30.155 -[yawns] -Ah, come on. 08:30.239 --> 08:31.156 -[splashing] -[baby cooing] 08:31.240 --> 08:32.282 [cell phone vibrating] 08:32.366 --> 08:34.243 Don't even think about it, Aman. 08:34.326 --> 08:36.119 I haven't slept in 48 hours, 08:36.203 --> 08:38.997 so if you're serious about paternity leave, then you have to realize 08:39.081 --> 08:42.167 your family is more important than your phone. Oh! 08:42.251 --> 08:43.377 I am so posting that. 08:43.460 --> 08:45.128 -[baby gurgling] -[splashing] 08:45.212 --> 08:46.630 Hey, Dad, can we talk? 08:46.713 --> 08:48.215 You can be drunk, if that's easier. 08:48.298 --> 08:49.549 What? No! 08:49.633 --> 08:51.176 Paternity leave applies to all my children. 08:51.260 --> 08:53.387 -Let's go to lunch. Run! -[baby coos] 08:53.470 --> 08:55.514 -[baby laughing] -Aman! 08:55.597 --> 08:58.392 [Darren] Okay. Quick lesson in the power of crystals. 08:58.475 --> 09:00.435 This is angelite. 09:00.519 --> 09:02.020 It treats anxiety 09:02.104 --> 09:03.981 by transmuting aberrant thoughts 09:04.064 --> 09:05.899 into productive cathexis. 09:05.983 --> 09:07.150 Whoa, cool! 09:07.234 --> 09:08.360 So, do you rub it? 09:08.443 --> 09:09.903 Or grind it up and snort it at a party, 09:09.987 --> 09:11.405 like regular anxiety meds? 09:11.488 --> 09:12.572 You take it 09:12.656 --> 09:14.783 and bang it on your head, real hard. 09:14.866 --> 09:16.493 Wait, really? [grunts] 09:16.576 --> 09:20.080 [laughs] No. Crystals are a hoax, Daphne. 09:20.163 --> 09:22.249 Like vitamins, or internships. 09:22.332 --> 09:24.209 That's why we loved working here so much. 09:24.293 --> 09:26.336 Charging idiots 30 bucks for a mystical rock 09:26.420 --> 09:28.714 feels like a crime, but it's totally legal. 09:28.797 --> 09:30.924 So, that's why you turned to real crime 09:31.008 --> 09:33.844 when the crystal market collapsed, to chase that high. 09:33.927 --> 09:37.014 Yes. But the party ended when your moms raided us. 09:37.097 --> 09:39.975 Sure, we got away, but they stole you. 09:40.058 --> 09:41.226 And now they're gonna pay. 09:41.310 --> 09:43.353 Everyone's gonna pay. 09:43.437 --> 09:44.730 Whoa, wait. What? 09:44.813 --> 09:47.316 For crystals. Everyone's gonna pay for crystals. 09:47.399 --> 09:49.985 See, thanks to underemployed millennials, 09:50.068 --> 09:51.445 ex-reality stars, 09:51.528 --> 09:54.156 and zero sense of global security, 09:54.239 --> 09:55.699 believing in crystals 09:55.782 --> 09:56.950 -is back, baby! -[all cheering] 09:57.034 --> 09:58.744 We can sell this hall and retire 09:58.827 --> 10:01.705 to the non-extradition country of our choice. 10:01.788 --> 10:03.707 Hello, Angola. 10:03.790 --> 10:05.167 Wait. You're leaving already? 10:05.250 --> 10:07.127 But there's still so much I don't know about you. 10:07.210 --> 10:08.545 Daphne, I'm on the run. 10:08.628 --> 10:10.088 A few more days of mining, and we're gone. 10:10.172 --> 10:12.341 But we can get to know each other until then. 10:12.424 --> 10:15.218 Say yes, and we'll tell you why you have orange hair. 10:15.302 --> 10:16.470 Oh, my God, yes! 10:16.553 --> 10:18.388 I smoked during pregnancy. Like, a lot. 10:18.472 --> 10:19.765 Like, I should be dead. 10:19.848 --> 10:22.559 Oh. Well, I'm glad you're alive. 10:22.642 --> 10:24.728 Let's get to know each other. 10:24.811 --> 10:27.564 So, what do you wanna talk about? The Miller case? 10:27.647 --> 10:30.192 Oh, right. This is lunch with my daughter. 10:30.275 --> 10:31.443 Uh, a couple of things. 10:31.526 --> 10:33.111 First, I think this place has changed 10:33.195 --> 10:34.279 since the last time we were here. 10:34.363 --> 10:36.448 [rock music playing] 10:36.531 --> 10:38.575 Oh, my God, I totally didn't notice. 10:38.658 --> 10:42.079 Sophie's boobs are out so much these days, this seems normal. 10:42.162 --> 10:44.498 -[message alert tone] -Oh, speak of the devil. 10:44.581 --> 10:46.458 "Buy diapers." [mimics whip-crack] 10:46.541 --> 10:47.918 Oh, you think that's bad? 10:48.001 --> 10:49.878 Sophie told me I can't pee in the shower anymore, 10:49.961 --> 10:51.838 because that's where she bathes Amanda. 10:51.922 --> 10:54.174 Now I have to pee in the shower at school, like a weirdo. 10:54.257 --> 10:57.052 Pro tip, aim for the drain. She'll never know. 10:57.135 --> 10:58.887 Oh, I'll try that. [gasps] 10:58.970 --> 11:01.264 Wait. Did you just teach me a life lesson? 11:01.348 --> 11:02.891 Yeah. You want another one? 11:02.974 --> 11:05.602 Don't date anyone who owns more throw pillows than books. 11:05.685 --> 11:07.479 Yes! Oh, my God. I had no idea 11:07.562 --> 11:09.773 you at least realize Sophie kind of sucks. 11:09.856 --> 11:13.110 It will make it so much easier to kick her ass out when I find Mom. 11:13.193 --> 11:15.946 Wait. "Find Mom"? Not this again. 11:16.029 --> 11:18.115 But that's what I need to talk to you about. 11:18.198 --> 11:19.616 To stop my hallucinations, 11:19.699 --> 11:22.202 I need you to believe me that Mom was kidnapped. 11:22.285 --> 11:23.328 Velma, please. 11:23.412 --> 11:24.663 Can't a father and daughter 11:24.746 --> 11:27.582 just enjoy a nice meal at a strip club, 11:27.666 --> 11:30.252 -without it being awkward? -Uh, no? 11:30.335 --> 11:32.879 But we were having fun for the first time ever. 11:32.963 --> 11:35.173 Yeah, we were. Look at us. 11:35.257 --> 11:36.800 Can we at least talk later? 11:36.883 --> 11:38.427 I have to stop my hallucinations. 11:38.510 --> 11:40.846 Hold that thought. I have to make some work calls. 11:42.013 --> 11:43.723 Oh, so you're going to work, are you? 11:43.807 --> 11:45.809 Well, then call me Ernest Shackleton, 11:45.892 --> 11:47.853 'cause I'm headed to a pole. 11:47.936 --> 11:49.146 -[yelps] -[thud] 11:49.229 --> 11:51.481 Fred? What are you doing at Nana's Nipples? 11:51.565 --> 11:53.608 I thought rich guys went to the Tits Carlton. 11:53.692 --> 11:54.818 That's our next stop. 11:54.901 --> 11:56.236 Yeah, my dad found out I like you 11:56.319 --> 11:58.196 and is now trying to "normalize" my brain 11:58.280 --> 12:01.241 back into thinking girls like Chestiny here are hot. 12:01.324 --> 12:02.117 [William] You! 12:02.200 --> 12:03.952 Get away from my son! 12:04.035 --> 12:06.997 He just asked the manager if there's a stripper gender pay gap! 12:07.080 --> 12:09.374 There is. Guys make way less. 12:09.458 --> 12:12.669 But thanks to you, Fred won't call it reverse sexism. 12:12.752 --> 12:14.337 He-He-He's ruined! 12:15.255 --> 12:16.756 [rock music playing] 12:16.840 --> 12:17.799 [inaudible] 12:18.884 --> 12:19.885 [grunts] 12:21.636 --> 12:23.805 Oh, yeah. Keep it all on. 12:23.889 --> 12:25.974 Show me nothing, baby. 12:26.057 --> 12:27.726 Velma, what are you doing up there? 12:27.809 --> 12:30.020 I'm doing what every girl is doing up here. 12:30.103 --> 12:32.022 I'm just trying to get my dad's attention. 12:32.105 --> 12:33.732 [in East European accent] And one day, it will work. 12:33.815 --> 12:36.026 Velma, stop! You have my attention. 12:36.109 --> 12:37.277 That's why I was on the phone. 12:37.360 --> 12:38.987 I was calling Sophie to tell her 12:39.070 --> 12:40.822 I need to spend the rest of my paternity leave with you. 12:40.906 --> 12:43.867 Wait, what? Are you nuts? She'll kill us both. 12:43.950 --> 12:45.410 I don't care. Like you said, 12:45.494 --> 12:47.370 we were just starting to have fun together. 12:47.454 --> 12:50.248 And let's be honest, the last couple of years haven't been very fun. 12:50.332 --> 12:51.416 What with my hair turning 12:51.500 --> 12:52.751 -gray-- -Mom being kidnapped. 12:52.834 --> 12:54.836 Sure, right. All that. 12:54.920 --> 12:56.880 So, what do you say we go have some fun? 12:56.963 --> 12:57.964 Just us. 12:58.048 --> 12:59.674 ["Greatest Love of All" playing] 12:59.758 --> 13:01.718 ♪ I believe the children Are our future... ♪ 13:03.303 --> 13:05.263 Ahh! I said, "Wait!" 13:10.477 --> 13:12.062 [grunts] 13:12.145 --> 13:13.897 Eh, by the time I say something, 13:13.980 --> 13:16.942 I could have already paid $5 for another coffee. 13:17.025 --> 13:18.318 [message alert tone] 13:18.401 --> 13:19.444 [Gigi reading] 13:19.528 --> 13:21.738 Oh, from now on, I'm wearing 'em. 13:22.280 --> 13:23.240 [screams] 13:23.323 --> 13:25.033 Amanda, where are you? 13:25.116 --> 13:26.159 Oh, God! 13:26.243 --> 13:27.619 [all chuckling] 13:30.580 --> 13:32.207 -[game over tone] -Ahh! 13:32.290 --> 13:34.125 ♪ People need someone To look up to ♪ 13:34.209 --> 13:35.293 [growling] 13:35.377 --> 13:36.628 [both screaming] 13:38.880 --> 13:39.756 [bats screeching] 13:42.175 --> 13:44.094 ♪ ...in love ♪ 13:44.177 --> 13:46.388 -To the best day ever. -[clinks] 13:46.471 --> 13:47.597 [vomits] 13:47.681 --> 13:49.391 -[coughs] -[bottles rattle] 13:51.017 --> 13:52.519 And yes, I know I still need 13:52.602 --> 13:54.729 to talk to my dad to end my hallucinations, 13:54.813 --> 13:56.189 but I don't want the fun to stop. 13:56.273 --> 13:58.400 Yesterday, for the first time ever, he said, 13:58.483 --> 13:59.985 "Your birthday's in March, right?" 14:00.068 --> 14:01.945 [cell phone ringing] 14:02.028 --> 14:05.574 Hey, can you answer that? I'm, like, substitute teacher-level hungover. 14:05.657 --> 14:07.284 No, it's Gigi. 14:07.367 --> 14:09.619 And you were right. My dad has taught me to be a beta. 14:09.703 --> 14:11.329 So I'm working on power moves. 14:11.413 --> 14:13.456 This morning, I left my bowl 14:13.540 --> 14:15.250 -in the sink. -Damn. 14:15.333 --> 14:16.793 [Fred] Hey, Velma. 14:16.876 --> 14:18.712 When you see your pops next, tell him thanks for me. 14:18.795 --> 14:20.297 Homie changed my life. 14:20.380 --> 14:21.631 Fred, I've told you. 14:21.715 --> 14:23.633 My dad isn't the Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh. 14:23.717 --> 14:27.304 No, he helped my dad buy Chestiny's contract from the strip club, 14:27.387 --> 14:29.556 so we could date and get my head sorted out. 14:29.639 --> 14:31.182 Isn't that right, babe? [moans] 14:31.266 --> 14:32.350 [grunts] Anything but kiss. 14:32.434 --> 14:34.311 Uh, that's impossible, Fred. 14:34.394 --> 14:35.812 My dad's on paternity leave. 14:35.895 --> 14:38.315 The only love he's buying right now is mine. 14:38.398 --> 14:39.816 Yeah, I don't know. 14:39.899 --> 14:41.735 Your dad figured out all the legal junk yesterday. 14:41.818 --> 14:43.194 Wait, what? 14:43.278 --> 14:45.530 Oh, my God! 14:45.614 --> 14:46.865 [keyboard clacking] 14:47.741 --> 14:49.117 You only told Sophie 14:49.200 --> 14:50.535 you wanted to spend your paternity leave with me 14:50.619 --> 14:52.621 so you could work while I was at school. 14:52.704 --> 14:53.913 What? No! 14:53.997 --> 14:55.999 -I'm only here because-- -[knocking on door] 14:56.082 --> 14:58.752 'Cause I'm having an affair with this woman! 14:58.835 --> 15:01.504 An affair? How dare you? 15:01.588 --> 15:04.090 Also, here's that extra work you requested. 15:06.426 --> 15:07.344 [sighs wearily] 15:08.928 --> 15:10.680 Where's that box? 15:10.764 --> 15:12.682 I'm ready to learn how my mom is connected to those dead girls. 15:12.766 --> 15:15.810 So you finally got your father to believe you? Freaking awesome. 15:15.894 --> 15:17.646 That's right, I swear now. 15:17.729 --> 15:19.648 And you're wearing a leather jacket? 15:19.731 --> 15:20.690 I stole it, baby. 15:20.774 --> 15:22.317 Off a teddy bear in the mall. 15:22.400 --> 15:24.194 We don't know what's gotten into him. 15:24.277 --> 15:25.236 I'm out of here. 15:25.320 --> 15:26.821 And I might be late for dinner. 15:28.239 --> 15:29.783 Don't pour my milk. 15:31.117 --> 15:32.494 Okay, now give me that box. 15:32.577 --> 15:35.246 Velma, wait. Are you sure you won't hallucinate? 15:35.330 --> 15:37.040 Yes. My hallucinations were caused 15:37.123 --> 15:39.542 by my desire to make my dad love me. 15:39.626 --> 15:41.544 But after today, he's dead to me, 15:41.628 --> 15:43.004 and if I don't care what he thinks, 15:43.088 --> 15:44.381 then I won't hallucinate. 15:44.464 --> 15:45.965 [suspenseful music playing] 15:47.634 --> 15:49.386 [gasps] 15:49.469 --> 15:51.721 Oh, my God. Honestly, I was, like, zero percent sure that would work. 15:51.805 --> 15:53.890 But I'm cured. I can find my mom. 15:53.973 --> 15:55.725 How is she connected to the dead girls? 15:55.809 --> 15:59.437 Okay, so after my mom died, her house was put up for sale, 15:59.521 --> 16:01.231 and Fred's family bought it. 16:01.314 --> 16:03.900 And that's what first got your mom interested in her. 16:03.983 --> 16:06.236 In her effort to learn more about Dr. Perdue, 16:06.319 --> 16:08.321 Diya uncovered the one thing 16:08.405 --> 16:12.617 my mother never intended anyone to find, her journals. 16:12.701 --> 16:14.744 That's how she learned Edna was my mom, 16:14.828 --> 16:17.288 and that her secret lab was still buried underneath the house. 16:17.372 --> 16:19.165 [Velma gasps] So, that's what my mom 16:19.249 --> 16:21.292 was doing at Fred's house on Christmas Eve. 16:21.376 --> 16:24.754 Looking for Dr. Perdue's secret lab, before Fred's family 16:24.838 --> 16:26.715 -moved in. -[Principal Rogers] Yes. 16:26.798 --> 16:29.759 Hmm. Okay, but how does this connect my mom to the dead girls? 16:29.843 --> 16:32.137 [Principal Rogers] There's only one explanation. 16:32.220 --> 16:34.389 Your mom opened the lab, and... 16:34.472 --> 16:35.765 -[roaring] -[screams] 16:35.849 --> 16:38.351 [voice echoing] The ghost of Dr. Edna Perdue 16:38.435 --> 16:40.562 has returned to finish her work! 16:40.645 --> 16:42.272 Wait, wait, wait. You're saying my mom 16:42.355 --> 16:44.482 was taken by the ghost of your mom? 16:44.566 --> 16:46.067 Really? I thought only idiots 16:46.151 --> 16:48.445 and B-list actresses believed in ghosts. 16:48.528 --> 16:51.489 Uh, have you seen our school bathrooms? 16:51.573 --> 16:52.949 No living human could do that. 16:53.032 --> 16:54.784 Ugh, I don't have time for this. 16:54.868 --> 16:56.119 I have to go find my mom 16:56.202 --> 16:59.372 and her not-a-ghost serial killer kidnapper. 16:59.456 --> 17:00.582 [electric guitar playing] 17:00.665 --> 17:02.167 Damn it, Norville. 17:05.628 --> 17:07.255 Where is everyone? 17:07.338 --> 17:09.632 [gasps] And the crystals are all gone. 17:09.716 --> 17:11.468 Wait. Are you leaving already? 17:11.551 --> 17:12.761 But I'm not ready. 17:12.844 --> 17:14.471 I need to know so much more. 17:14.554 --> 17:16.848 Daphne, the only thing left for you to know 17:16.931 --> 17:18.767 is you deserve better than us. 17:20.310 --> 17:21.311 A gun? 17:21.394 --> 17:23.480 Hold on. Is that a goodbye gift? 17:23.563 --> 17:25.482 Oh, I didn't get you anything. 17:25.565 --> 17:27.984 Sure you did. You are our insurance policy 17:28.068 --> 17:31.446 in case your moms try and stop us on our way out of town. 17:31.529 --> 17:32.947 Wait, what? 17:33.031 --> 17:35.033 Is that why you let me find you? 17:35.116 --> 17:38.119 Just so you could use me? That's so manipulative! 17:38.203 --> 17:40.622 Which explains why I'm so manipulative. 17:40.705 --> 17:42.123 But still, I'm your daughter. 17:42.207 --> 17:44.000 And your parents are criminals, Daph. 17:44.083 --> 17:45.168 -I'm sorry-- -[gunshot] 17:46.127 --> 17:47.003 [gasps] 17:47.087 --> 17:48.838 Yeah, you are sorry, Darren. 17:48.922 --> 17:51.007 We've been on to you since you busted out of jail 17:51.090 --> 17:53.259 and put a geode through our daughter's window. 17:53.343 --> 17:54.719 You have? 17:54.803 --> 17:56.930 We're maybe not the best cops, but we're great moms. 17:57.013 --> 17:59.307 We always know what you're up to, sweetie. 17:59.390 --> 18:00.725 What's this? 18:00.809 --> 18:02.685 "Brenda"? Huh! Why does that name ring a bell? 18:02.769 --> 18:05.063 She's one of the dead girls, and that's her tank top. 18:05.146 --> 18:07.190 You can see stains from her boob contour. 18:07.273 --> 18:09.526 What? Carroll found that shirt down here, 18:09.609 --> 18:11.694 and I upcycled it as a rag. 18:11.778 --> 18:13.363 We only have one planet, people. 18:13.446 --> 18:14.531 [camera flashes] 18:14.614 --> 18:15.698 -[bats screeching] -[all screaming] 18:20.286 --> 18:21.287 Velma! 18:21.371 --> 18:23.957 Where are you? I'm sorry! 18:24.040 --> 18:27.877 Also, please be cool for once and don't tell Sophie. 18:27.961 --> 18:28.962 [knocking on door] 18:29.045 --> 18:30.380 Velma? You can't be here. 18:30.463 --> 18:32.340 I told you, Father forbids it. 18:32.423 --> 18:35.301 Fred, there's a secret lab under your basement and I have to find it. 18:35.385 --> 18:36.803 Now, you can help me, 18:36.886 --> 18:38.596 or you can keep telling yourself that if you jump 18:38.680 --> 18:40.890 through all of Daddy's hoops, maybe one day, he'll love you. 18:40.974 --> 18:43.560 Please. As if my father has the time 18:43.643 --> 18:45.937 to make me jump through hoops. Hey! 18:46.855 --> 18:48.356 Hairy girl not wrong. 18:48.439 --> 18:51.234 Only way to earn father's respect is take a stand. 18:51.317 --> 18:52.402 You want I help kill him? 18:52.485 --> 18:54.571 [suspenseful music playing] 18:57.657 --> 18:59.784 Yeah, let's do it. Hmm? 18:59.868 --> 19:01.870 [Chestiny] Whoo-hoo! I'm rich! 19:01.953 --> 19:03.913 Now Daddy will love me. 19:03.997 --> 19:05.248 [sighs] 19:05.331 --> 19:07.083 -[tires screeching] -[engine revving] 19:08.293 --> 19:09.919 Norville, what's going on? 19:10.003 --> 19:12.130 You're ignoring my calls like I just took you on a first date. 19:12.213 --> 19:13.923 That's because a man answers his phone 19:14.007 --> 19:17.010 when he damn well feels like answering his phone, Lamont. 19:17.093 --> 19:18.970 Okay, well, Gigi almost died. 19:19.053 --> 19:22.390 She was stung by a bee digging her pants out of the garbage at school, 19:22.473 --> 19:24.851 and the nurse was out of adrenaline shots. 19:26.519 --> 19:28.771 -Oh, no! -[sunglasses clatter] 19:28.855 --> 19:31.482 I'm making her a "Get Well" lemon cake. 19:31.566 --> 19:34.611 -Wanna help? -I'll get my zester. 19:34.694 --> 19:36.613 Wow. I never knew how big it was 19:36.696 --> 19:38.406 down here in the bad boy room. 19:38.489 --> 19:41.826 I just hang by the door ever since the rats ate that butler. 19:41.910 --> 19:43.411 [Velma gasps] The lab entrance! 19:43.494 --> 19:45.204 But it's still closed. 19:45.288 --> 19:47.332 If my mom didn't open it, where'd she go? 19:47.415 --> 19:50.043 Oh. Maybe it's one of those doors where you push in a brick 19:50.126 --> 19:51.669 -and it opens. -Fred, wait! 19:52.211 --> 19:53.338 No! 19:55.381 --> 19:57.800 [Daphne grunting] 19:57.884 --> 20:00.303 So you really knew I was with them the whole time? 20:00.386 --> 20:02.013 Or was that just another lie? 20:02.096 --> 20:03.473 Another lie? 20:03.556 --> 20:06.309 The only thing we've ever lied to you about is the dog. 20:06.392 --> 20:08.269 Truth is, he went to a farm. 20:08.353 --> 20:10.647 No, I know you stole me from them. 20:10.730 --> 20:11.898 Stole you? 20:11.981 --> 20:13.733 We didn't steal you. 20:13.816 --> 20:15.068 We took you. 20:16.569 --> 20:17.862 [police sirens blaring] 20:17.946 --> 20:19.656 We gotta go. 20:19.739 --> 20:20.949 And there's not gonna be enough room for all the goods and Daphne. 20:21.032 --> 20:22.575 Oh, okay. Well, as parents, 20:22.659 --> 20:25.161 there's only one right decision to make here. 20:27.872 --> 20:29.207 [Donna] Damn it! They got away! 20:29.290 --> 20:30.708 [baby gurgling] 20:30.792 --> 20:32.168 [both] Aw! 20:32.251 --> 20:35.046 Oh, my God, I feel like such an idiot. 20:35.129 --> 20:36.381 They abandoned me twice. 20:36.464 --> 20:38.633 That's why we never told you the truth. 20:38.716 --> 20:40.551 We loved you from the moment we saw you, 20:40.635 --> 20:42.220 and didn't want you to ever feel 20:42.303 --> 20:45.014 like you were unwanted for even a second. 20:45.098 --> 20:47.100 I love you, too, Moms. 20:47.183 --> 20:50.061 Ooh, angelite. That cures anxiety. 20:50.144 --> 20:51.020 [Daphne sighs] 20:51.771 --> 20:52.939 [Velma groaning] 20:53.022 --> 20:54.565 [Diya] Velma? Sweetie? 20:54.649 --> 20:57.151 -Can you hear me? -Mom? Is that you? 20:57.235 --> 20:58.653 I found you. 20:58.736 --> 21:00.655 But did you, like, get a weird haircut? 21:00.738 --> 21:02.115 [Aman] No, Velma, it's me. 21:02.198 --> 21:04.701 The parent who only abandoned you emotionally. 21:04.784 --> 21:07.537 Dad? Wait. Did I die and go to hell? 21:07.620 --> 21:10.290 Damn it! I always knew atheism was a gamble. 21:10.373 --> 21:11.708 How did you find me? 21:11.791 --> 21:14.252 I can locate your phone, like any good parent. 21:14.335 --> 21:15.712 Okay. Sophie installed it 21:15.795 --> 21:18.297 so you never catch us in bed talking smack about you. 21:18.381 --> 21:20.341 No, no. I don't have time to sit here 21:20.425 --> 21:23.136 and listen to some too-little-too-late excuse. 21:23.219 --> 21:24.220 Yes, you do. 21:24.303 --> 21:25.388 Because your legs are still buried. 21:25.471 --> 21:26.973 -[straining] -Now look. 21:27.056 --> 21:28.808 I'm sorry for how much I worked when you were little, 21:28.891 --> 21:30.935 but I figured you were fine because you had your mother. 21:31.019 --> 21:32.311 But then she walked out on us, 21:32.395 --> 21:33.688 and I wanted to be there for you, 21:33.771 --> 21:36.107 but it's too hard because I feel so guilty. 21:36.190 --> 21:38.026 So, I hide at work. 21:38.109 --> 21:40.778 But you wouldn't feel guilty if you just believed she was kidnapped. 21:40.862 --> 21:42.739 Who would kidnap your mother? 21:42.822 --> 21:45.575 No one wants to talk about 9/11 that much anymore. 21:45.658 --> 21:48.453 Fine, don't believe me. I'll just find her on my own. 21:48.536 --> 21:50.079 -[grunts] -[bricks clattering] 21:50.163 --> 21:51.247 I'm fine. 21:55.501 --> 21:56.669 Footprints? 21:56.753 --> 21:58.046 People were just here. 21:58.129 --> 21:59.380 And what's this? 22:00.423 --> 22:01.591 Jinkies! 22:01.674 --> 22:03.426 "Jinkies"? Why are you saying "jinkies"? 22:03.509 --> 22:06.220 Is this like when you tried to make "Keep it frosty" a thing? 22:06.304 --> 22:07.472 No! 22:07.555 --> 22:09.057 Someone wrote "jinkies" on this paper. 22:09.140 --> 22:10.349 But why? 22:10.433 --> 22:11.601 [in demonic voice] You'll never know, Velma. 22:11.684 --> 22:12.769 [screams] 22:12.852 --> 22:14.187 Oh, no, Dad! I need you to believe me 22:14.270 --> 22:15.980 that Mom was kidnapped, or I'm gonna die! 22:16.064 --> 22:18.274 Okay, okay, I believe you, I swear! 22:18.357 --> 22:20.943 -I believe you. -Oh, my God! 22:21.027 --> 22:22.653 That... That did it. 22:22.737 --> 22:24.655 -She's gone. -Psych! 22:24.739 --> 22:26.449 Oh, no, she's back. But how? 22:26.532 --> 22:28.659 Hold on. Were you lying about believing me? 22:28.743 --> 22:31.370 Velma, I want to believe, but... 22:31.454 --> 22:32.789 Wait. 22:32.872 --> 22:34.874 Oh, my God, you're right. She was kidnapped! 22:34.957 --> 22:37.794 I actually believe you, for real this time. 22:37.877 --> 22:39.170 -He does? -You do? 22:39.253 --> 22:40.505 He does! 22:40.588 --> 22:42.423 No! 22:49.013 --> 22:51.766 [sighs in relief] My hallucinations are finally over. 22:51.849 --> 22:55.186 Are you sure? 'Cause I feel like you've said that before. 22:55.269 --> 22:56.479 Like a few times. 22:56.562 --> 22:59.190 No, it's over. I know my dad believes me. 22:59.273 --> 23:00.399 I'm so sorry 23:00.483 --> 23:02.193 -I doubted you, Velma. -It's okay. 23:02.276 --> 23:05.405 Because when you saw I was willing to die for my truth, 23:05.488 --> 23:06.989 you finally came around. 23:07.073 --> 23:09.325 -Because you do love me. -Yes. 23:09.408 --> 23:12.829 But also, "jinkies" is written in your mother's handwriting. 23:12.912 --> 23:14.247 She was just here. 23:14.330 --> 23:15.623 Jinkies! 23:15.706 --> 23:18.084 Okay, now you're totally trying to make it a thing. 23:29.595 --> 23:32.807 So, if this was all about your dad believing you, 23:32.890 --> 23:36.519 how did making you laugh also stop your hallucinations? 23:36.602 --> 23:38.354 Right? Or kissing Daphne? 23:38.437 --> 23:39.605 [both] "Kissing Daphne"? 23:39.689 --> 23:41.065 Uh, the point is, I don't know, 23:41.149 --> 23:42.608 but I'm sure I'll figure it out. 23:42.692 --> 23:44.944 It would be pretty lazy not to. Now, come on! 23:45.027 --> 23:47.613 Whoever has my mom, and removed those girls' brains, 23:47.697 --> 23:50.158 was just here. So the question is, 23:50.241 --> 23:51.534 where'd they go? 23:52.660 --> 23:55.246 [suspenseful music playing] 23:55.329 --> 23:56.455 -[clinks] -Huh? 23:57.415 --> 23:58.583 Huh. 23:58.666 --> 24:00.376 -[footsteps approaching] -[heavy breathing] 24:00.459 --> 24:01.335 [screaming] 24:02.795 --> 24:04.881 [theme music playing]