WEBVTT 00:01:09.713 --> 00:02:07.299 ..:: ارائه شده توسط وب سايت بلبل جان ::.. ‏.:: www.bolboljan.net ::. 00:02:09.713 --> 00:02:14.299 Tell me, how did a nice girl like you get into a racket like this? 00:02:15.093 --> 00:02:17.676 Actually, I was studying at the Paris Conservatoire. 00:02:17.763 --> 00:02:22.224 I was going to be a concert pianist. Chopin and Debussy, like that. 00:02:23.060 --> 00:02:27.225 Then, the night of my first recital, the piano cover fell on my hand. 00:02:27.939 --> 00:02:30.932 Three broken fingers and a broken dream. 00:02:32.527 --> 00:02:34.769 After that, I didn't care what happened to me 00:02:34.821 --> 00:02:37.780 as long as I could feed myself and my little dog. 00:02:42.704 --> 00:02:43.694 Thank you. 00:03:27.999 --> 00:03:30.582 Do you mind if I ask you a personal question? 00:03:30.794 --> 00:03:34.834 You mean, why does a girl like me have to do this for a living? 00:03:35.257 --> 00:03:38.000 Actually, I'm Belgian. 00:03:38.343 --> 00:03:41.006 My parents were missionaries in the Congo. 00:03:42.139 --> 00:03:46.008 - I don't want to talk about that. - I understand. 00:03:47.102 --> 00:03:50.846 So now there's just me and my sister. She's in the hospital. 00:03:50.939 --> 00:03:53.056 She needs three transfusions a day. 00:03:53.358 --> 00:03:56.192 Do you know how much a pint of blood costs these days? 00:03:58.238 --> 00:03:59.228 Thank you. 00:04:47.704 --> 00:04:50.321 Sorry, pooch. What's his name? 00:04:50.749 --> 00:04:52.706 Her name. Coquette. 00:04:52.751 --> 00:04:54.413 And what's yours? 00:04:54.795 --> 00:04:57.253 Irma. They call me Irma la Douce. 00:04:57.589 --> 00:05:00.332 That means Irma the sweet. I don't know why. 00:05:01.426 --> 00:05:03.258 I know why! 00:05:03.929 --> 00:05:07.138 - How much is that in dollars? - $5. 00:05:07.432 --> 00:05:09.674 Actually, I don't even know my real name. 00:05:09.768 --> 00:05:12.181 I was brought up in an orphanage near Cherbourg. 00:05:12.270 --> 00:05:13.932 It was destroyed on D-day. 00:05:13.980 --> 00:05:16.188 I've been sending money every week to help rebuild it. 00:05:16.274 --> 00:05:18.732 I've already paid for a whole wing. 00:05:21.822 --> 00:05:23.905 That's all I have on me, ma'am. 00:05:24.491 --> 00:05:26.904 Actually, it was bombed by the 8th Air Force. 00:05:26.952 --> 00:05:29.114 Not that I blame you Americans. 00:05:29.329 --> 00:05:33.790 But if you could see those poor orphans sleeping on the floor, the rain coming in. 00:05:33.834 --> 00:05:36.417 There are no beds yet, and no roof. 00:05:40.841 --> 00:05:43.709 Do y'all take traveler's checks? 00:06:20.255 --> 00:06:23.669 This, then, is the story of Irma la Douce. 00:06:24.342 --> 00:06:28.336 A story of passion, bloodshed, desire, and death. 00:06:29.097 --> 00:06:32.511 Everything, in fact, that makes life worth living. 00:06:35.145 --> 00:06:38.684 The place is Paris. The time is 5:00 a.m. 00:06:43.111 --> 00:06:47.446 You may have read in travel folders that Paris is a city that never sleeps. 00:06:47.532 --> 00:06:49.319 Don't you believe it. 00:06:52.454 --> 00:06:55.197 At this time of the day, there is nothing doing 00:06:55.540 --> 00:06:58.283 unless you're working for the department of sanitation. 00:07:02.547 --> 00:07:06.166 If you want a nightcap at Maxim's, it's too late. 00:07:06.217 --> 00:07:08.254 It's been closed for hours. 00:07:11.681 --> 00:07:15.220 If you want to jump off the Eiffel Tower, it's too early. 00:07:15.602 --> 00:07:17.434 It won't be open for hours. 00:07:19.689 --> 00:07:24.434 So, if you're looking for a little action, forget the high-rent district. 00:07:24.569 --> 00:07:27.232 You'd better come to our neighborhood. 00:07:28.406 --> 00:07:32.116 This is Les Halles, the wholesale food market. 00:07:32.369 --> 00:07:35.487 We call it "the stomach of Paris." 00:07:41.753 --> 00:07:44.791 You can keep your Champs-Elysées and your palace in Versailles. 00:07:44.881 --> 00:07:46.588 This is the place for me. 00:07:46.633 --> 00:07:50.627 Brawling, vulgar, smelly, but alive. 00:07:56.226 --> 00:07:59.890 Beef from Charolais. Pork from Perigord. 00:08:00.063 --> 00:08:03.647 Lamb from Brittany. Veal from Normandy. 00:08:08.196 --> 00:08:10.813 Brains and kidneys and tripe. 00:08:11.783 --> 00:08:15.447 Pigs' feet and calves' heads waiting for sauce vinaigrette. 00:08:19.124 --> 00:08:22.959 Salmon from the Loire. Sole from the Channel. 00:08:23.253 --> 00:08:25.119 Lobsters from Corsica. 00:08:25.630 --> 00:08:29.670 Oysters from Dieppe. Sardines from Lorient. 00:08:31.302 --> 00:08:34.795 Asparagus from Argenteuil. Oranges from Valencia. 00:08:34.931 --> 00:08:38.891 Melons from Cavaillon. Cabbage from Aubervilliers. 00:08:39.853 --> 00:08:42.937 But man does not live by cabbage alone. 00:08:44.941 --> 00:08:46.978 And if that's what you're in the market for 00:08:47.027 --> 00:08:50.145 just step around the corner into the rue Casanova. 00:08:50.196 --> 00:08:53.689 This is where the girls are, or as we say, the poules. 00:08:54.242 --> 00:08:56.484 You have your choice of Kiki the Cossack, 00:08:56.578 --> 00:09:00.492 Amazon Annie, Lolita, Suzette Wong, Mimi the MauMau, 00:09:00.999 --> 00:09:03.491 and then, of course, there's Irma la Douce. 00:09:03.835 --> 00:09:07.328 She was born right here in Les Halles in a truck behind the fish market. 00:09:07.422 --> 00:09:11.962 Like all the other poules, she takes her coffee break in a bistro across the street. 00:09:13.136 --> 00:09:16.504 This is the owner. He is known as "Moustache." 00:09:16.681 --> 00:09:18.297 According to the police records 00:09:18.349 --> 00:09:21.888 he is a Romanian chicken thief named Constantinescu. 00:09:21.978 --> 00:09:25.096 When he bought this place, it was already called "Chez Moustache." 00:09:25.190 --> 00:09:29.400 Naturally, it was cheaper to grow a moustache than to buy a new sign. 00:09:30.153 --> 00:09:34.523 Sometimes at dawn, the rich slummers drop in for a bowl of onion soup, 00:09:34.574 --> 00:09:39.444 but mostly the clientele consists of the poules and their mecs. 00:09:40.497 --> 00:09:44.286 You know what a mec is. How do you say it in English? 00:09:44.459 --> 00:09:46.542 A protector? A consort? 00:09:46.961 --> 00:09:48.372 A business manager. 00:09:48.463 --> 00:09:51.171 Well, stick around. You'll get the idea. 00:10:00.308 --> 00:10:01.515 How are we doing? 00:10:01.559 --> 00:10:02.800 Not bad. 00:10:04.395 --> 00:10:08.059 Mostly tips. I had some real pigeons tonight. 00:10:08.233 --> 00:10:10.145 Sometimes I wish you were twins. 00:10:10.360 --> 00:10:11.567 Thanks. 00:10:12.112 --> 00:10:13.102 What's that? 00:10:13.238 --> 00:10:15.070 What's what? Oh, that. 00:10:15.156 --> 00:10:18.445 The last one had no more money, so he gave me a traveler's check. 00:10:18.535 --> 00:10:22.119 - Is that nice, Irma, holding out on me? - It's only $10. 00:10:22.247 --> 00:10:24.409 And you weren't going to tell me about it? 00:10:24.457 --> 00:10:27.700 I was going to put it down as a deposit on a hair dryer. 00:10:27.794 --> 00:10:30.662 A hair dryer? We're partners, Irma! 00:10:30.922 --> 00:10:33.130 - You wouldn't want to cheat me. - Let go. 00:10:33.216 --> 00:10:37.210 - There's such a thing as ethics, you know. - You're hurting me, you big ox! 00:10:37.262 --> 00:10:41.131 If you don't like the way I treat you, why don't you get yourself another guy? 00:10:41.224 --> 00:10:45.264 - I will, one of these days. - Why wait? Why don't you leave me now? 00:10:45.937 --> 00:10:47.428 I'd take her anytime. 00:10:48.439 --> 00:10:49.805 You would? 00:10:51.359 --> 00:10:54.102 - It was just a joke, Hippolyte. - A joke? 00:10:54.737 --> 00:10:56.945 So how come nobody's laughing? 00:11:08.835 --> 00:11:10.371 Go back to work. 00:11:11.504 --> 00:11:12.540 Ox! 00:11:19.053 --> 00:11:22.091 And so it was one big happy family around here. 00:11:22.348 --> 00:11:25.136 The mecs, the poules, and the flics, 00:11:25.643 --> 00:11:27.760 or as you would say, the cops. 00:11:43.661 --> 00:11:47.871 Your statesmen and politicians keep talking about peaceful coexistence, 00:11:47.957 --> 00:11:50.916 but here in our milieu, we really practice it. 00:11:51.586 --> 00:11:54.670 The attitude of the police is "live and let live" 00:11:55.590 --> 00:11:58.708 and some of them make a pretty good living at it. 00:12:03.097 --> 00:12:06.090 Every other Friday the flics would raid the rue Casanova. 00:12:06.184 --> 00:12:09.518 Just for the record, a few poules would be hauled to the station. 00:12:09.646 --> 00:12:11.012 They'd pay a small fine 00:12:11.105 --> 00:12:14.439 and 24 hours later, they'd be back on the street. 00:12:16.152 --> 00:12:19.020 It was a nice, friendly, civilized arrangement. 00:12:19.197 --> 00:12:22.656 Everybody looked the other way. Everybody kept his mouth shut. 00:12:22.700 --> 00:12:24.157 Nobody got hurt 00:12:24.786 --> 00:12:27.028 except maybe an occasional fly. 00:12:29.290 --> 00:12:31.202 And then one day, disaster. 00:12:31.542 --> 00:12:34.330 An honest policeman came on the beat. 00:14:17.648 --> 00:14:19.810 Coquette. Come here, Coquette. 00:14:20.985 --> 00:14:21.975 You naughty girl! 00:14:22.111 --> 00:14:24.353 Pardon me, mademoiselle. Do you have a license? 00:14:24.447 --> 00:14:25.938 A license? No. 00:14:26.240 --> 00:14:28.323 That's a violation of Ordinance Number 56. 00:14:28.534 --> 00:14:31.777 - Usually they let us get away with it. - Not me. 00:14:31.954 --> 00:14:34.992 And, according to the law, you're supposed to keep it on a leash. 00:14:35.041 --> 00:14:36.657 On a leash? 00:14:39.003 --> 00:14:41.290 Of course. I'll remember that. 00:14:42.006 --> 00:14:43.588 Just a moment. 00:14:44.842 --> 00:14:48.506 What are all you girls doing around here at this hour of the morning? 00:14:49.013 --> 00:14:51.505 I don't know about them. I'm just walking my dog. 00:14:51.641 --> 00:14:54.509 - I see. - I have to take her out all the time. 00:14:54.602 --> 00:14:57.140 - She has kidney stones. - It's a shame. 00:14:58.231 --> 00:15:01.941 Look, if you don't mind my saying so... 00:15:05.905 --> 00:15:07.942 I'm sorry. 00:15:09.992 --> 00:15:12.860 You know, I've never seen a girl in green stockings before. 00:15:12.912 --> 00:15:15.325 It matches the ribbon and my underwear. 00:15:15.706 --> 00:15:16.913 Green underwear? 00:15:18.793 --> 00:15:20.534 Say, are you new around here? 00:15:20.628 --> 00:15:23.336 - It's my first day. - I thought so. 00:15:23.381 --> 00:15:25.247 I've been on the force for six months. 00:15:25.341 --> 00:15:29.130 I was stationed at the Bois de Boulogne by the lake where the children play. 00:15:29.220 --> 00:15:32.384 - That's how I got this medal. - What, for keeping kids off the grass? 00:15:32.473 --> 00:15:35.557 No. I saved a boy from drowning, mouth-to-mouth respiration. 00:15:35.643 --> 00:15:38.226 So they thought I was ready for bigger things and transferred me here. 00:15:39.439 --> 00:15:43.103 - You're going to like it here. - I'm not so sure. 00:15:46.571 --> 00:15:49.564 You know, if I were you, I'd exercise that dog somewhere else. 00:15:49.740 --> 00:15:50.730 Why? 00:15:50.825 --> 00:15:55.570 Those girls over there, something tells me they're streetwalkers. 00:15:56.038 --> 00:15:59.952 - No! - Yes! I can spot them six blocks away. 00:16:01.836 --> 00:16:05.250 Hey, Irma, I just got off work, so I thought if you're not busy... 00:16:05.339 --> 00:16:06.625 I beg your pardon! 00:16:06.716 --> 00:16:10.585 - Irma it's me, André, wholesale artichokes. - I don't need any. 00:16:10.636 --> 00:16:13.879 What's the matter? Want me to go to Kiki the Cossack? 00:16:13.931 --> 00:16:16.093 - Is this man annoying you? - No. It's all right. 00:16:16.184 --> 00:16:18.141 Not now. Come back later. 00:16:18.227 --> 00:16:21.015 Later? I've only got a half-hour. 00:16:21.939 --> 00:16:25.023 Look, Officer, there's a truck double-parked there. 00:16:25.109 --> 00:16:27.897 - Why don't you do your duty? - Maybe I will. 00:16:28.029 --> 00:16:30.988 - He takes his work seriously. - I try. 00:16:32.158 --> 00:16:35.526 - See you again sometime. - I wouldn't be surprised. 00:17:09.445 --> 00:17:13.735 - What will it be, Officer? Cognac? - No. I never drink when I'm on duty. 00:17:13.824 --> 00:17:15.941 Matter of fact, I never drink when I'm off duty. 00:17:15.993 --> 00:17:18.827 Give me just a little glass of Vichy water. 00:17:24.335 --> 00:17:26.452 Looking for something, Officer? 00:17:28.839 --> 00:17:30.831 What do you know about that hotel? 00:17:31.050 --> 00:17:34.634 - Casanova slept there in 1763. - I'm not talking about 1763. 00:17:34.679 --> 00:17:36.921 Since I've been here, four couples walked in there. 00:17:37.014 --> 00:17:38.880 Monday is always a slow night. 00:17:40.851 --> 00:17:44.970 Just between us, would you have even a vague idea what they're doing in there? 00:17:45.022 --> 00:17:47.890 I have a very definite idea. They're making love. 00:17:48.526 --> 00:17:51.519 - That's illegal! - Shows you the kind of world we live in. 00:17:51.571 --> 00:17:54.029 Love is illegal, but not hate. 00:17:54.115 --> 00:17:56.607 That you can do anywhere, anytime, to anybody. 00:17:56.826 --> 00:17:58.692 But if you want a little warmth and tenderness 00:17:58.786 --> 00:18:01.278 a shoulder to cry on, a smile to cuddle up with 00:18:01.497 --> 00:18:04.706 you have to hide in dark corners like a criminal! 00:18:05.209 --> 00:18:06.575 I wouldn't call that love. 00:18:07.211 --> 00:18:09.498 Spoken like a petit bourgeois. 00:18:10.047 --> 00:18:12.414 It's flagrant vice! It must be stamped out! 00:18:12.842 --> 00:18:15.459 My dear boy, your thinking is not only fuzzy, 00:18:15.553 --> 00:18:19.547 it's economically unsound, and I know what I'm talking about. 00:18:19.724 --> 00:18:22.262 I used to be professor of Economics at the Sorbonne. 00:18:22.351 --> 00:18:25.059 - A professor? - For six years, but that's another story. 00:18:25.187 --> 00:18:28.897 So you should agree that decent citizens have a right to be protected from this! 00:18:28.941 --> 00:18:30.773 Let's take a decent citizen, 00:18:30.901 --> 00:18:34.190 married for 20 years, works hard all day selling baby carriages. 00:18:34.238 --> 00:18:37.151 In the evening, he wants a little fun. A little companionship. 00:18:37.241 --> 00:18:39.904 So he comes to rue Casanova. He meets a girl. 00:18:39.994 --> 00:18:42.907 She gives him some companionship. He gives her some money. 00:18:43.039 --> 00:18:44.530 The girl gives the money to her boyfriend 00:18:44.582 --> 00:18:47.996 who spends it on drinks, on cufflinks, at the racetrack. 00:18:48.836 --> 00:18:53.001 Sometimes, he even pays a little money to a policeman. 00:18:53.257 --> 00:18:55.965 - Bribe a policeman? - That's the beauty of it! 00:18:56.052 --> 00:18:59.716 The policeman takes the money and buys a baby carriage from the decent citizen. 00:18:59.764 --> 00:19:04.429 Thusly, money is kept in circulation. Everybody's prosperous and happy. 00:19:04.518 --> 00:19:06.601 - I don't believe it! - It's elementary. 00:19:06.646 --> 00:19:09.730 I don't believe there are policemen who take money. 00:19:09.857 --> 00:19:12.144 Not all policemen take money. 00:19:12.234 --> 00:19:16.444 Some of the higher-ups have a more intimate arrangement with the girls. 00:19:16.530 --> 00:19:19.819 There's one policeman around here who isn't corrupt! 00:19:29.919 --> 00:19:32.457 Would you know the number of the police station? 00:19:33.464 --> 00:19:35.421 Central 5288. 00:19:35.883 --> 00:19:38.091 But I wouldn't be so impetuous if I were you. 00:19:38.135 --> 00:19:39.626 Have your Vichy. 00:19:49.772 --> 00:19:51.684 Desk Sergeant, this is Officer Patou. 00:19:51.816 --> 00:19:54.900 I want a police van sent immediately to the Hotel Casanova. 00:19:54.985 --> 00:19:57.648 Violation of Section 34 of the Criminal Code. 00:19:58.197 --> 00:20:00.484 Not "Littering the Sidewalks." That's Section 43. 00:20:00.574 --> 00:20:02.406 This is "Lewd and Immoral Conduct." 00:20:02.493 --> 00:20:04.530 There goes another couple! I'm gonna raid the place. 00:20:10.459 --> 00:20:12.451 You're asking for trouble, my young friend. 00:20:12.503 --> 00:20:16.668 To be overly honest in a dishonest world is like plucking a chicken against the wind. 00:20:16.757 --> 00:20:19.841 You'll only wind up with a mouthful of feathers. 00:20:20.386 --> 00:20:23.299 Don't worry, old man. I know what I'm doing. 00:20:43.534 --> 00:20:45.366 Do you have a fire alarm here? 00:20:45.786 --> 00:20:47.618 Yes! 00:20:47.705 --> 00:20:51.745 It's right over there. Yes, Officer. It's in perfect working order. 00:20:56.213 --> 00:20:57.749 Where is the fire? 00:21:00.092 --> 00:21:01.458 Right here. 00:21:03.095 --> 00:21:05.712 That's hot! God, that's... 00:21:07.475 --> 00:21:09.137 No, doggy, don't. 00:21:09.894 --> 00:21:11.681 You're under arrest. 00:21:17.693 --> 00:21:22.063 All right, everybody! The party's over! 00:21:22.198 --> 00:21:24.155 Girls on this side. Men over here. 00:21:24.241 --> 00:21:26.403 - What is this? - A raid! 00:21:26.452 --> 00:21:29.069 On a Monday? It's supposed to be every other Friday. 00:21:29.121 --> 00:21:31.738 - Can I go back up and get my stockings? - No. Come on. 00:21:31.874 --> 00:21:34.036 You ought to pay me half. It wasn't my fault! 00:21:34.084 --> 00:21:37.703 I don't know what she's talking about. I'm a salesman. I was unpacking samples. 00:21:37.755 --> 00:21:39.087 Come on. 00:21:39.924 --> 00:21:41.005 Over. 00:21:43.385 --> 00:21:46.969 You ought to be ashamed of yourself, scaring a poor little dog like that. 00:21:47.056 --> 00:21:51.221 They ought to take the dog away from you. You're not a fit mother. 00:21:51.769 --> 00:21:52.805 Quiet! Quiet! 00:21:54.021 --> 00:21:56.308 I'll let you men go. We'll need you later as witnesses. 00:21:56.398 --> 00:21:59.106 - Name? - Jack Casanova. 00:22:00.194 --> 00:22:02.561 - What's yours? - André Casanova. 00:22:03.239 --> 00:22:07.028 - I suppose you're Pierre Casanova. - No. I'm General Lafayette. 00:22:07.618 --> 00:22:08.859 Retired. 00:22:08.953 --> 00:22:10.785 All right, let's start all over again. 00:22:10.830 --> 00:22:13.163 - And what's your name? - I'm Officer Nestor... 00:22:13.249 --> 00:22:15.741 Just a moment. Who's doing the investigating here? 00:22:15.793 --> 00:22:18.536 This is an outrage. I'll see that you lose your job. 00:22:18.629 --> 00:22:20.791 - Shut up. - Do you know who you're talking to? 00:22:20.881 --> 00:22:22.964 Trying to bribe an officer? 00:22:31.433 --> 00:22:32.799 Back! Everybody back! 00:22:33.102 --> 00:22:35.970 Okay, ladies, let's go. Come on! 00:22:36.897 --> 00:22:38.433 - In we go. - Not so rough! 00:22:38.482 --> 00:22:39.973 Come on. Up. Up! 00:22:40.025 --> 00:22:41.732 - Watch that baton! - Come on. Up! 00:22:41.819 --> 00:22:44.482 - Don't handle the merchandise! - In you get. 00:22:44.572 --> 00:22:45.733 Take it easy! 00:22:45.823 --> 00:22:48.611 Come on. Let's go. Let's go. Come on. 00:22:48.951 --> 00:22:50.362 Here we go. Let's go. 00:22:50.452 --> 00:22:52.284 Here we go. Just a minute. 00:22:52.454 --> 00:22:56.118 - No smoking in a police van. - Just who do you think you are, De Gaulle? 00:22:56.166 --> 00:22:57.657 Inside. Come on. 00:22:58.002 --> 00:23:01.336 What do they expect us to do now? Collect unemployment insurance? 00:23:01.380 --> 00:23:03.246 It's that new flic. 00:23:03.465 --> 00:23:07.755 One of these days, I'm going to catch him out of uniform and then... 00:23:08.387 --> 00:23:09.969 Up, up, up. Let's go. 00:23:12.808 --> 00:23:15.221 - Who does this belong to? - Not me. 00:23:46.467 --> 00:23:48.754 Officer, would you zip my dress up? 00:23:50.930 --> 00:23:53.138 Will you hold this, please? 00:24:04.568 --> 00:24:05.558 Hey! 00:24:24.254 --> 00:24:27.588 Say, Officer, do you really have to take us to the station? 00:24:27.675 --> 00:24:30.793 The last time we were arrested, we drove right on to Deauville. 00:24:30.886 --> 00:24:33.424 What a weekend. Eighteen girls and three policemen. 00:24:33.472 --> 00:24:36.089 And they weren't nearly as cute as you are. 00:24:40.312 --> 00:24:43.646 - Wouldn't you like to have a harem? - We'll make you feel like a king. 00:24:43.732 --> 00:24:44.813 King Farouk. 00:24:46.819 --> 00:24:48.685 Look! He's blushing! 00:24:49.947 --> 00:24:51.438 I guess he's too young. 00:24:51.490 --> 00:24:54.278 Maybe if we put a moustache on him, he'd look older! 00:24:56.495 --> 00:24:58.282 All right. All right! 00:24:58.706 --> 00:25:01.949 One false move out of any one of you, I'm gonna let you have it! 00:25:04.211 --> 00:25:06.794 That's enough, girls! Leave him alone! 00:25:06.880 --> 00:25:09.167 - He can take care of himself. - No, he can't. 00:25:09.258 --> 00:25:12.467 You know what he was doing before? Policing a children's playground. 00:25:13.512 --> 00:25:16.346 "Now, now, kids, stay out of the bushes." 00:25:16.473 --> 00:25:18.305 "Don't take candy from strangers." 00:25:18.392 --> 00:25:20.384 "And no playing doctor." 00:25:21.562 --> 00:25:25.397 "Little birdie, pretty little birdie 00:25:25.482 --> 00:25:28.646 "Little birdie, fly away with me 00:25:28.944 --> 00:25:30.936 "We will build a little nest 00:25:31.030 --> 00:25:32.692 "We will build a little nest 00:25:32.781 --> 00:25:34.773 - "Get the best - "Get the best 00:25:34.825 --> 00:25:36.612 - "In my nest - "In my nest 00:25:36.702 --> 00:25:38.534 "Little blue jay..." 00:26:00.142 --> 00:26:01.474 Come on, get down. 00:26:07.775 --> 00:26:09.232 Stop it! 00:26:10.235 --> 00:26:11.646 Everybody! 00:26:13.697 --> 00:26:14.687 Come on. 00:26:18.535 --> 00:26:19.651 Here, you dropped this. 00:26:19.703 --> 00:26:22.446 Thanks. You seem to be the only nice one in the bunch. 00:26:22.581 --> 00:26:25.540 - They were just pulling your leg. - And it almost came off. 00:26:25.626 --> 00:26:30.087 - Sorry I have to put you in jail. - I don't mind. I can use a little rest. 00:26:42.267 --> 00:26:46.261 Officer Nestor Patou checking in 16 females suspected of lewd vagrancy. 00:26:47.147 --> 00:26:50.811 - And one poodle. - How many? 16? 00:26:50.901 --> 00:26:53.939 Yes, Sergeant. Monday's always slow, but I'll do better next time. 00:26:54.029 --> 00:26:56.066 - You will? - Definitely. 00:27:00.786 --> 00:27:01.947 Hello. 00:27:08.627 --> 00:27:12.667 About the little one, don't worry, we'll feed her around here. 00:27:12.756 --> 00:27:15.499 Thank you, but not the horse meat you give the police dogs. 00:27:15.592 --> 00:27:18.630 - She's got kidney stones, remember. - Patou. 00:27:19.680 --> 00:27:21.387 The inspector wants to see you. 00:27:21.473 --> 00:27:23.089 The inspector, did you hear that? 00:27:23.183 --> 00:27:26.597 - The inspector wants to see me. - Maybe they'll give you another medal. 00:27:26.687 --> 00:27:29.225 Do you think so? Not on my first day. 00:27:29.273 --> 00:27:30.559 In there! 00:27:36.029 --> 00:27:37.270 Come in! 00:27:43.954 --> 00:27:46.913 Officer Patou reporting. You sent for me, sir. 00:27:46.957 --> 00:27:49.290 - So you're the new man in our outfit. - Yes, sir. 00:27:49.334 --> 00:27:51.200 I've been wondering what you looked like. 00:27:51.461 --> 00:27:53.418 - You've seen me before. - I have? 00:27:53.881 --> 00:27:55.918 Don't you remember, at the Hotel Casanova? 00:27:55.966 --> 00:27:58.128 What was I doing at the Hotel Casanova? 00:27:58.385 --> 00:28:00.968 - I don't know, but I was raiding the place. - You were? 00:28:01.013 --> 00:28:04.552 - Who authorized the raid? - I was using my own judgment, sir. 00:28:04.641 --> 00:28:07.224 It was obvious. A violation of Section 34. 00:28:07.311 --> 00:28:10.304 I'm sure we can get a conviction with you as a witness. 00:28:10.355 --> 00:28:12.813 And look at your uniform! It's disgraceful! 00:28:12.858 --> 00:28:16.898 There were 16 of them in the van, and they were resisting arrest, sir. 00:28:16.987 --> 00:28:18.603 And I was resisting, too. 00:28:18.655 --> 00:28:21.944 I didn't lose my head, just my gun, but I got it back. 00:28:22.117 --> 00:28:24.325 Take off your cap when talking to your superior! 00:28:24.411 --> 00:28:25.401 Yes, sir. 00:28:48.518 --> 00:28:49.884 Cheri. 00:28:50.187 --> 00:28:52.895 You ought to get out of those wet clothes. 00:28:52.981 --> 00:28:54.392 I'll help you. 00:28:55.859 --> 00:28:57.441 Look who's here. 00:28:58.028 --> 00:29:00.862 "Little birdie, pretty little birdie 00:29:01.156 --> 00:29:04.024 "Little birdie, fly away with me" 00:29:10.332 --> 00:29:12.198 A glass of Vichy, right? 00:29:12.376 --> 00:29:17.167 Cognac, please, to get the taste of feathers out of my mouth. 00:29:17.214 --> 00:29:21.083 "Little birdie pretty little birdie 00:29:21.260 --> 00:29:24.719 "Little birdie, fly away with me" 00:29:24.888 --> 00:29:26.720 You off duty? 00:29:26.890 --> 00:29:28.051 Permanently. 00:29:28.850 --> 00:29:32.594 - I've been bounced from the police force. - You don't say. 00:29:32.688 --> 00:29:35.806 They had the goods on me: insubordination, accepting bribes 00:29:35.899 --> 00:29:39.267 and a button missing from my uniform, so they took away my medal! 00:29:39.361 --> 00:29:41.068 Threw me out of the barracks. 00:29:41.613 --> 00:29:44.196 Reminds me of when I was drummed out of the army. 00:29:44.324 --> 00:29:47.817 Marrakesh. I was a colonel in the Foreign Legion. 00:29:48.870 --> 00:29:51.738 Was that before or after you were a professor of Economics? 00:29:51.790 --> 00:29:56.251 No. In between, I was a croupier in Monte Carlo, but that's another story. 00:29:56.920 --> 00:29:58.252 One more. 00:29:58.964 --> 00:30:00.796 So what's your next move? 00:30:01.341 --> 00:30:04.505 I've been looking for a job. I applied to all the bureaux. 00:30:04.594 --> 00:30:07.211 Customs inspection, post office, sanitation department. 00:30:07.264 --> 00:30:08.926 Once you've been dishonorably discharged 00:30:09.016 --> 00:30:11.008 they won't even let you clean the sewers. 00:30:12.144 --> 00:30:15.603 I hate to see a young man like you take a defeatist attitude. 00:30:15.689 --> 00:30:17.897 The world is full of opportunities. 00:30:18.275 --> 00:30:19.891 Just look around. 00:30:21.111 --> 00:30:23.148 There's One-Armed Jojo. 00:30:23.405 --> 00:30:25.021 Used to be a safecracker, 00:30:25.115 --> 00:30:28.279 until he put a little too much nitroglycerin in the vault. 00:30:28.744 --> 00:30:31.157 And that's Casablanca Charlie. 00:30:31.580 --> 00:30:34.072 Five years ago, he walked in with holes in his shoes 00:30:34.124 --> 00:30:36.161 and a pocketful of dirty postcards. 00:30:36.960 --> 00:30:38.872 Or take Hippolyte the Ox. 00:30:38.962 --> 00:30:41.454 Used to be a purse-snatcher around the market. 00:30:41.923 --> 00:30:43.789 They all started at the bottom 00:30:44.092 --> 00:30:47.961 but they had perseverance and drive and vision. 00:30:48.638 --> 00:30:50.300 Now they've got it made. 00:30:50.557 --> 00:30:52.139 They're retired. 00:30:52.309 --> 00:30:53.971 They let their girls work for them. 00:30:55.312 --> 00:30:57.975 I'm afraid I wasn't cut out for a life of crime. 00:30:58.023 --> 00:31:00.515 There you go, selling yourself short. 00:31:00.942 --> 00:31:04.902 Maybe I could snatch a purse or crack a small safe 00:31:04.988 --> 00:31:08.481 but to sit around in a striped suit while some girl in the street... 00:31:08.617 --> 00:31:12.156 - Never! - You're being petit bourgeois again. 00:31:12.746 --> 00:31:14.863 Life is total war, my friend. 00:31:15.123 --> 00:31:18.116 Nobody has the right to be a conscientious objector. 00:31:24.424 --> 00:31:26.882 - Cigarettes. - Pack of Gitanes, coming up. 00:31:26.968 --> 00:31:29.130 - Hello. - Hello. 00:31:29.721 --> 00:31:31.212 Nasty night, isn't it? 00:31:31.515 --> 00:31:35.600 It never fails. Wouldn't you know, just this afternoon I gave her a permanent. 00:31:35.727 --> 00:31:40.518 - Put them on my bill. - Can I buy you a cheap drink? 00:31:41.650 --> 00:31:42.857 Why not? 00:31:43.777 --> 00:31:46.645 - Can you afford a peppermint tea? - Certainly. 00:31:46.696 --> 00:31:48.858 One peppermint tea, coming up. 00:31:50.033 --> 00:31:51.740 Here we are again. 00:31:52.077 --> 00:31:54.490 Again? Have we been together before? 00:31:54.913 --> 00:31:57.576 I guess you don't recognize me out of uniform. 00:31:58.917 --> 00:32:01.785 Uniform? Oh, about a month ago. 00:32:01.878 --> 00:32:05.588 You're that sailor with Brigitte Bardot tattooed on your chest? 00:32:05.674 --> 00:32:08.883 No. It was just this morning. I arrested you. 00:32:09.594 --> 00:32:11.551 Of course. 00:32:11.888 --> 00:32:14.380 I'm sorry. I never remember a face. 00:32:16.560 --> 00:32:18.552 How long did they keep you in the police station? 00:32:18.603 --> 00:32:22.267 - About an hour. - I was out much faster than that. 00:32:24.443 --> 00:32:26.230 - Sugar? - Thanks. 00:32:26.278 --> 00:32:28.816 Say, that hotel. Tell me, what are the rates? 00:32:28.905 --> 00:32:31.363 - Why? - I'm looking for a room. 00:32:31.408 --> 00:32:33.991 They charge by the hour. Nobody can afford to live there. 00:32:34.077 --> 00:32:36.410 Besides, they don't take anybody with luggage. 00:32:38.582 --> 00:32:40.039 Irma! 00:32:49.676 --> 00:32:51.167 Let's have it. 00:32:54.097 --> 00:32:55.508 Is that all? 00:32:55.599 --> 00:32:57.761 It's the weather. Nothing's happening out there. 00:32:57.809 --> 00:33:01.428 - Get out and make it happen. - You mind if I dry off first? 00:33:01.480 --> 00:33:04.268 On your way. I haven't won a hand all evening. 00:33:17.287 --> 00:33:19.244 When I walked a beat on a night like this 00:33:19.289 --> 00:33:21.781 I'd wear two pairs of wool socks. You should try it. 00:33:21.875 --> 00:33:24.583 - How about long underwear? - By all means. 00:33:24.628 --> 00:33:28.793 Also, I used to put an old newspaper inside my coat to keep my chest warm. 00:33:28.924 --> 00:33:32.088 Look, mister, I'm in a very competitive business. 00:33:32.135 --> 00:33:36.971 You have one advantage. At least you get indoors and off your feet occasionally. 00:33:37.057 --> 00:33:39.800 - I'm sorry. - Forget it. 00:33:40.560 --> 00:33:43.678 You really ought to cut down on it. I mean, one after another! 00:33:43.772 --> 00:33:47.732 - Mind your own business. - You want to smoke yourself to death... 00:33:48.818 --> 00:33:51.060 I've met guys asking me to do a lot of crazy things 00:33:51.154 --> 00:33:52.611 but not to give up smoking. 00:33:52.656 --> 00:33:56.070 I don't mean to get personal, it's just that I like you. 00:33:56.159 --> 00:33:58.947 When I was living in Dijon, there was a girl that I loved... 00:33:58.995 --> 00:34:00.076 And I remind you of her. 00:34:00.163 --> 00:34:02.371 Actually, you don't look anything like her. 00:34:02.499 --> 00:34:05.162 But she was a heavy smoker, 60 cigarettes a day. 00:34:05.252 --> 00:34:07.835 Coughing all the time. 00:34:10.257 --> 00:34:12.624 What are you hanging around for? I said out! 00:34:12.676 --> 00:34:13.883 Please, you're interrupting. 00:34:13.969 --> 00:34:16.507 All right, all right. We were just talking. 00:34:16.596 --> 00:34:17.632 About smoking. 00:34:17.681 --> 00:34:19.764 Talk on your own time, not during working hours. 00:34:19.849 --> 00:34:23.013 I would strongly advise you to let go of the lady. 00:34:23.853 --> 00:34:26.186 - It's you. - I'll give you exactly five seconds. 00:34:26.273 --> 00:34:32.190 One, two, three, four, five. 00:34:32.696 --> 00:34:34.187 That's better. 00:34:50.463 --> 00:34:51.704 Outside. 00:34:53.091 --> 00:34:56.630 And don't come back with any excuses. I need 100 francs. 00:35:06.730 --> 00:35:09.518 Watch it. This is a new hat. 00:35:09.733 --> 00:35:11.224 Had enough? 00:35:43.683 --> 00:35:45.424 Now I'm mad. 00:35:46.728 --> 00:35:51.564 Now I am really mad, and when I get mad, I'm like a tiger! 00:35:51.900 --> 00:35:54.267 Do you hear that, boys? He's a tiger. 00:36:19.969 --> 00:36:21.676 Girls! A fight! 00:37:55.857 --> 00:37:57.189 All right. 00:37:57.734 --> 00:37:59.100 Who's next? 00:38:25.178 --> 00:38:26.385 Cognac. 00:38:33.144 --> 00:38:36.888 - Care for another peppermint tea? - No, thank you. 00:38:38.566 --> 00:38:40.558 Put everything on my bill. 00:38:41.861 --> 00:38:43.272 Shall we go? 00:38:43.780 --> 00:38:45.396 We might as well. 00:38:46.366 --> 00:38:48.528 I'm getting bored with this place. 00:39:24.195 --> 00:39:25.561 Where are we going? 00:39:25.655 --> 00:39:28.989 - To my apartment. - I thought you lived in the hotel. 00:39:29.409 --> 00:39:31.150 That's my business address. 00:39:33.580 --> 00:39:35.412 Come on. You're getting wet. 00:39:44.173 --> 00:39:46.540 Don't expect too much when we get up there. 00:39:46.634 --> 00:39:48.000 Not at all. 00:39:48.595 --> 00:39:51.804 - I have no rugs, no icebox. - As long as you have an empty couch. 00:39:51.890 --> 00:39:53.176 No couch. 00:40:01.024 --> 00:40:02.936 I also have to get curtains. 00:40:03.318 --> 00:40:07.779 You see, they're working across the street repairing the roof, and I sleep in the nude. 00:40:07.864 --> 00:40:12.575 It's about time they started fixing up... You mean you don't wear anything? 00:40:12.827 --> 00:40:14.864 Nothing but a sleeping mask. 00:40:17.665 --> 00:40:22.000 That's all right, then, because the workmen wouldn't recognize you anyway. 00:40:24.547 --> 00:40:26.834 You know what I've got? An electric blanket. 00:40:26.883 --> 00:40:27.919 You do? 00:40:28.009 --> 00:40:31.218 It was a present from somebody with the American Embassy. 00:40:31.638 --> 00:40:35.131 That must be nice, an electric blanket on a night like this. 00:40:35.224 --> 00:40:36.806 Only it doesn't work. 00:40:37.060 --> 00:40:39.177 They've got a different kind of electricity there. 00:40:39.228 --> 00:40:41.971 - AC or DC or something. - That's too bad. 00:40:42.231 --> 00:40:44.439 Don't worry. You won't be cold. 00:40:51.574 --> 00:40:53.065 I'm not worried. 00:40:59.832 --> 00:41:02.825 It's very attractive. It has atmosphere. 00:41:03.044 --> 00:41:06.162 It used to be a studio. A painter once lived here. 00:41:06.255 --> 00:41:10.249 Poor guy, he was starving. Tried everything, even cut his ear off. 00:41:10.468 --> 00:41:14.087 - Van Gogh? - No. I think his name was Schwartz. 00:41:14.806 --> 00:41:17.389 Would you believe it? I'm an artist myself. 00:41:17.517 --> 00:41:18.974 I believe it. 00:41:19.394 --> 00:41:20.851 See this bed? 00:41:21.270 --> 00:41:22.306 Yes. 00:41:23.773 --> 00:41:24.854 I painted it. 00:41:29.153 --> 00:41:30.644 Very good job. 00:41:30.780 --> 00:41:34.399 It looked just awful when I found it at the flea market. 00:41:47.046 --> 00:41:48.833 Can I borrow a newspaper? 00:41:49.132 --> 00:41:50.589 You want to read? 00:41:50.967 --> 00:41:52.333 No, of course not. 00:41:53.011 --> 00:41:54.968 Can I take your stockings off? 00:41:57.682 --> 00:41:59.264 Sure. Go ahead. 00:42:36.679 --> 00:42:38.511 You really are shy, aren't you? 00:42:39.182 --> 00:42:40.673 Me? Shy? 00:42:41.893 --> 00:42:46.638 Not particularly. It's just the kind of world we live in. 00:42:46.689 --> 00:42:50.854 What I mean is, if you hate somebody, you can do that anytime, anyplace. 00:42:50.943 --> 00:42:55.734 But if you like somebody, you've got to hide in dark corners. 00:42:58.367 --> 00:43:02.577 You know, I'm sort of glad about that girl in Dijon with the cough. 00:43:02.705 --> 00:43:03.695 You are? 00:43:03.873 --> 00:43:08.743 Because, frankly, in the police van, I thought that you'd never in your life... 00:43:09.378 --> 00:43:11.870 She wasn't the only girl. 00:43:11.923 --> 00:43:14.040 I've had more than one girl. 00:43:15.051 --> 00:43:16.337 How many? 00:43:16.886 --> 00:43:18.172 Altogether? 00:43:18.554 --> 00:43:19.761 Let me see... 00:43:21.015 --> 00:43:22.176 Three? 00:43:22.350 --> 00:43:24.012 Not as many as that. 00:43:45.414 --> 00:43:46.530 What's your name? 00:43:49.210 --> 00:43:51.577 Nestor. Nestor Patou. 00:43:52.004 --> 00:43:54.371 Don't take all night, Nestor Patou. 00:43:56.467 --> 00:43:57.708 I won't. 00:45:26.682 --> 00:45:29.015 Didn't you say you had a sleeping mask? 00:45:30.478 --> 00:45:32.185 You're really something. 00:46:12.311 --> 00:46:14.268 What's going on? What are you doing? 00:46:45.386 --> 00:46:46.422 Irma! 00:46:49.181 --> 00:46:50.171 Irma! 00:46:55.604 --> 00:46:56.594 Irma! 00:47:05.698 --> 00:47:07.064 Irma! 00:47:15.791 --> 00:47:17.032 Irma! 00:47:17.793 --> 00:47:18.954 Irma. 00:47:21.255 --> 00:47:22.996 Where are you, Irma? 00:47:23.549 --> 00:47:26.542 Where are you, Irma? 00:47:44.362 --> 00:47:46.479 What are you doing way over there? 00:47:48.949 --> 00:47:50.986 It's 4:00 in the afternoon. 00:47:51.577 --> 00:47:52.818 Come back. 00:47:53.162 --> 00:47:54.243 What's gotten into you? 00:47:54.330 --> 00:47:56.743 I don't know. I guess I've become an addict. 00:47:56.999 --> 00:47:58.115 Irma! 00:48:06.092 --> 00:48:08.960 - What do you want? - I want to talk to you. 00:48:09.678 --> 00:48:11.340 You go to hell! 00:48:11.847 --> 00:48:13.759 I'm coming up to get my clothes. 00:48:14.308 --> 00:48:15.799 Just a minute. 00:48:17.228 --> 00:48:19.345 Who is it? That big ox again? 00:48:31.909 --> 00:48:34.242 Look, if you two have something personal to discuss... 00:48:34.328 --> 00:48:36.285 Just stay right where you are. 00:48:39.542 --> 00:48:40.703 Catch. 00:48:45.548 --> 00:48:49.918 What about my suits and my silk shirts and my jewelry? 00:48:50.302 --> 00:48:53.716 This is what you came with, and this is what you're leaving with. 00:48:53.806 --> 00:48:55.297 Why, you little... 00:48:55.391 --> 00:48:57.758 You're lucky I don't take back that gold tooth. 00:49:00.187 --> 00:49:02.679 I'm going to come up there and break your arm! 00:49:03.607 --> 00:49:05.018 You are? 00:49:06.819 --> 00:49:07.980 Tiger. 00:49:09.405 --> 00:49:11.112 Come on out, Tiger. 00:49:30.509 --> 00:49:33.422 You want my friend here to beat you up again? 00:49:39.143 --> 00:49:41.135 You'll be hearing from me. 00:49:45.774 --> 00:49:47.606 And stay away! 00:49:54.325 --> 00:49:57.659 - You could beat him up again, right? - Naturally. 00:49:57.828 --> 00:50:01.822 It's just that I don't like to pick on anybody who isn't my size. 00:50:10.966 --> 00:50:14.130 How'd you get mixed up with a character like that anyway? 00:50:14.178 --> 00:50:16.135 You should have seen the one I had before. 00:50:16.180 --> 00:50:19.014 He was not only mean, he used to run around with other women 00:50:19.099 --> 00:50:20.431 and on my money. 00:50:24.480 --> 00:50:26.437 Why do you have to have anybody at all? 00:50:27.483 --> 00:50:31.102 Everybody needs somebody, like Coquette needs me. 00:50:31.570 --> 00:50:33.482 Who wants to be a stray dog? 00:50:33.781 --> 00:50:36.489 You've got to belong to someone, even if he kicks you once in a while. 00:50:38.744 --> 00:50:40.485 Don't you have any family? 00:50:40.538 --> 00:50:44.077 No. My mother was a very successful woman. 00:50:44.166 --> 00:50:47.000 She used to have the same spot outside the hotel that I do. 00:50:47.086 --> 00:50:50.329 Then one day, she met a guy, fell in love with him and quit. 00:50:52.341 --> 00:50:53.627 That's very romantic. 00:50:53.676 --> 00:50:55.338 Romantic? It's stupid. 00:50:56.011 --> 00:50:57.843 Gave up her career. For what? 00:50:58.013 --> 00:50:59.424 Some slob from the market. 00:50:59.515 --> 00:51:02.383 Dragged around those heavy sides of beef till he dropped dead. 00:51:02.476 --> 00:51:04.843 Then it was too late for Mama to make a comeback. 00:51:04.895 --> 00:51:07.854 She wound up as a cashier in the fish market. 00:51:09.108 --> 00:51:12.192 Only smart thing she ever did was not marry my father. 00:51:12.861 --> 00:51:14.568 You mean, you're not, 00:51:15.489 --> 00:51:16.696 legitimate? 00:51:16.865 --> 00:51:18.106 That's right. 00:51:18.200 --> 00:51:22.285 You'd think, with a background like that, I'd have turned out no good. 00:51:23.080 --> 00:51:26.369 I know you're doing very well, but a girl like you... 00:51:26.458 --> 00:51:28.074 There's other kinds of jobs. 00:51:28.335 --> 00:51:30.827 This isn't just a job! It's a profession. 00:51:31.046 --> 00:51:32.207 Of course. 00:51:32.673 --> 00:51:36.132 Somebody has to do these things, but in your case... 00:51:36.218 --> 00:51:39.131 - Now that I know you better... - I get that all the time. 00:51:39.221 --> 00:51:42.385 A man I met the other night thought I was too good for this. 00:51:42.474 --> 00:51:46.343 You know what he does for a living? He's a mortician! Now, I ask you. 00:51:47.104 --> 00:51:50.893 - Ask me what? - Why is it nine out of ten try to reform me? 00:51:51.442 --> 00:51:53.684 You're not one of those, are you? 00:51:53.819 --> 00:51:56.232 Who, me? No. 00:51:56.572 --> 00:51:58.313 I used to be one of those... 00:51:59.325 --> 00:52:02.033 ...petit bourgeois, but that was yesterday. 00:52:02.077 --> 00:52:03.739 I know better now. 00:52:12.254 --> 00:52:14.166 I don't think she cares for me. 00:52:15.799 --> 00:52:17.711 You two better make friends if you're to live here. 00:52:17.760 --> 00:52:19.968 We'd better... Live here? 00:52:20.346 --> 00:52:22.258 Why? Don't you like the idea? 00:52:22.348 --> 00:52:26.388 Sure, I like the idea. It's just that I had no idea. 00:52:26.935 --> 00:52:31.430 - Is this all you've got? - Just my old uniform and my toilet kit. 00:52:33.609 --> 00:52:36.147 Try one of those suits in the closet. 00:52:36.570 --> 00:52:37.777 Go ahead. 00:52:46.622 --> 00:52:49.410 Let's see how you look in the brown one with the pinstripes. 00:52:49.625 --> 00:52:51.332 He hardly ever wore it. 00:52:51.585 --> 00:52:53.622 Said it was too conservative. 00:53:03.847 --> 00:53:07.966 - I'm afraid the sleeves may be a little... - Don't worry about that. 00:53:08.018 --> 00:53:10.761 There's a brown derby that goes with it. 00:53:22.991 --> 00:53:26.701 - What are the glasses for? - The races. 00:53:27.371 --> 00:53:29.112 They look very powerful. 00:53:30.666 --> 00:53:31.656 Whoops. 00:53:31.750 --> 00:53:34.117 - What's the matter? - Wrong end. 00:53:35.087 --> 00:53:38.421 - You want me to turn around? - No. I mean the glasses. 00:53:41.218 --> 00:53:43.631 I'll bet nobody ever saw you like this before. 00:53:44.346 --> 00:53:47.430 - You'd lose. - Through field glasses? 00:53:48.058 --> 00:53:49.344 No bet. 00:53:51.186 --> 00:53:54.930 When I first met you, I thought you were pretty. I was totally wrong. 00:53:55.023 --> 00:53:56.184 You're beautiful. 00:53:57.359 --> 00:53:59.100 You're out of your mind or out of focus. 00:53:59.278 --> 00:54:01.736 Without makeup, you look about 14 years old. 00:54:02.990 --> 00:54:06.358 I wore makeup when I was 14 so I could pass for 17. 00:54:06.410 --> 00:54:09.198 - Then by the time I was 17... - Never mind. 00:54:11.665 --> 00:54:13.702 I don't want to hear about it. 00:54:17.045 --> 00:54:18.536 This coat looks ridiculous. 00:54:18.630 --> 00:54:21.964 Have it fixed. Just take it in to Maurice the tailor. 00:54:24.261 --> 00:54:27.880 - All right, but I won't wear the hat. - But you have to. 00:54:27.973 --> 00:54:31.057 It all goes together, the suit, the hat the glasses. 00:54:31.101 --> 00:54:32.888 For when you go to the racetrack. 00:54:33.270 --> 00:54:35.307 The racetrack? Who's got time for the racetrack? 00:54:35.397 --> 00:54:39.311 - I've got to get myself a job. - What do you mean, a job? 00:54:39.568 --> 00:54:41.981 I'm sure I can find something around the market. 00:54:42.070 --> 00:54:44.778 Unloading trucks, cleaning the stalls... 00:54:46.408 --> 00:54:47.944 What's the matter? 00:54:54.875 --> 00:54:56.616 Did I say something wrong? 00:54:58.629 --> 00:55:00.586 You're trying to make me feel cheap. 00:55:00.798 --> 00:55:01.959 Cheap? 00:55:02.591 --> 00:55:05.299 How would it look if I let you go to work? 00:55:05.761 --> 00:55:09.129 Do you want the other girls to think I can't support my man? 00:55:09.306 --> 00:55:10.296 Irma. 00:55:10.390 --> 00:55:13.224 I want you to be better dressed than anybody else. 00:55:13.268 --> 00:55:15.430 I want you to have more money in your pockets. 00:55:15.771 --> 00:55:17.262 I want to be proud of you. 00:55:17.314 --> 00:55:20.648 But, Irma, you don't understand. I never felt like this about anybody. 00:55:20.734 --> 00:55:23.101 That's why I'll work twice as hard for you 00:55:23.153 --> 00:55:25.611 as I ever did for any of the others. 00:55:41.380 --> 00:55:42.712 Your turn. 00:55:44.299 --> 00:55:45.665 Tiger. 00:55:58.021 --> 00:56:01.640 I don't feel like playing anymore. Get somebody else. 00:56:07.573 --> 00:56:09.155 Give me a drink. 00:56:09.241 --> 00:56:11.107 Cognac, Pernod, Calvados? 00:56:11.285 --> 00:56:13.322 Yeah, and in that order. 00:56:13.996 --> 00:56:16.409 Why don't you shut that damn jukebox off? 00:56:16.582 --> 00:56:19.575 Problem? You're sitting pretty with a gold mine working for you. 00:56:19.668 --> 00:56:21.204 Shut yourself off, too. 00:56:21.336 --> 00:56:24.545 I'm looking for Irma, with the green stockings and the bow-wow... 00:56:24.673 --> 00:56:26.084 She's not here. Go away. 00:56:26.174 --> 00:56:28.507 I've been away. Tangiers, Naples, Cairo. 00:56:28.552 --> 00:56:31.716 I've met up with a lot of dames, but there's nothing like that Irma. 00:56:32.848 --> 00:56:34.055 Get out of here. 00:56:34.683 --> 00:56:36.766 - What is this? - I know about you. 00:56:36.852 --> 00:56:39.469 You're the one with Brigitte Bardot tattooed on your chest! 00:56:41.523 --> 00:56:43.355 You crazy? 00:56:48.906 --> 00:56:53.025 - She must know two sailors. - That's a hell of a way to treat a customer. 00:56:53.076 --> 00:56:55.238 I can't take it. I'm so jealous, I'm losing my mind. 00:56:55.370 --> 00:56:58.078 You must be. A mec falling in love with his poule. 00:56:58.206 --> 00:56:59.322 You're like an impresario. 00:56:59.374 --> 00:57:02.913 You're handling Pavlova. And you want her to dance just for you? 00:57:03.045 --> 00:57:07.210 It's a God-given talent. It was meant to be shared with the public. 00:57:08.759 --> 00:57:09.920 Again. 00:57:14.306 --> 00:57:17.970 - There's the bow-wow! - Come on, sailor! Keep rowing! 00:57:26.234 --> 00:57:29.443 What a night! Everybody seems to have the same idea. 00:57:29.529 --> 00:57:32.897 Always happens when there's a full moon. I haven't had time to breathe. 00:57:32.950 --> 00:57:35.112 - How's my baby? - Fine. 00:57:35.202 --> 00:57:37.910 No, he isn't. As a matter of fact, he's very grouchy. 00:57:38.163 --> 00:57:41.031 We can fix that. I have a little present for you. 00:57:41.249 --> 00:57:42.490 What is it? 00:57:42.584 --> 00:57:44.120 A stickpin. You put it in your tie. 00:57:44.211 --> 00:57:45.873 - I don't need it. - Yes, you do. 00:57:45.921 --> 00:57:49.005 Mimi got Casablanca Charlie one. This one has real sapphires. 00:57:49.091 --> 00:57:50.332 Come on, let's go, Irma. 00:57:50.425 --> 00:57:52.007 - Go where? - Home. 00:57:52.094 --> 00:57:54.256 It's only 1:00 a.m. A package of Gitanes. 00:57:54.429 --> 00:57:57.718 - You know I never quit before 5:00. - Take the night off. 00:57:57.808 --> 00:58:01.267 Just walk off the job, just like that? Disappoint all my regulars? 00:58:01.311 --> 00:58:03.177 To hell with them! 00:58:03.689 --> 00:58:05.897 Why don't we go away somewhere for a week? 00:58:06.274 --> 00:58:08.561 A week? What are we going to live on? 00:58:08.610 --> 00:58:10.852 If I stay away that long, I'll lose my spot. 00:58:11.405 --> 00:58:14.819 - She's got the best spot on the street. - We never have time together. 00:58:15.033 --> 00:58:17.867 You're out there all night. You sleep all day. 00:58:17.953 --> 00:58:19.945 If only Monsieur Camembert were still around. 00:58:19.997 --> 00:58:21.954 You remember Monsieur Camembert, don't you? 00:58:22.040 --> 00:58:23.656 Do I? Big spender. 00:58:23.750 --> 00:58:25.787 Who is Monsieur Camembert? 00:58:26.837 --> 00:58:30.797 That's what we called him. He was a cheese wholesaler at the market. 00:58:30.882 --> 00:58:32.339 He used to see me twice a week. 00:58:32.426 --> 00:58:36.670 Always gave me 500 francs, so I didn't have to see anybody else. 00:58:36.805 --> 00:58:38.797 I had lots of time then. 00:58:38.890 --> 00:58:42.474 I went to cooking school, I knitted sweaters, played solitaire. 00:58:42.519 --> 00:58:44.385 He was such a nice man. 00:58:44.813 --> 00:58:46.520 What happened to him? 00:58:47.274 --> 00:58:49.516 His wife died, so he stopped coming around. 00:58:49.609 --> 00:58:51.942 It was a great loss to all of us. 00:58:52.988 --> 00:58:56.152 Girls! Here comes another busload of tourists! 00:59:02.456 --> 00:59:03.572 Irma... 00:59:04.541 --> 00:59:05.873 Stay here. 00:59:07.586 --> 00:59:09.043 You're sweet. 00:59:09.463 --> 00:59:10.670 Kiss me. 00:59:15.177 --> 00:59:17.294 I've been thinking. Maybe you're right. 00:59:17.596 --> 00:59:20.259 - I'm going to give it up. - You are? 00:59:20.849 --> 00:59:25.014 I promise you, this is absolutely the last pack I'll ever smoke. 00:59:27.522 --> 00:59:29.605 All right, all right. We're going. 00:59:29.691 --> 00:59:31.182 See you later. 00:59:34.279 --> 00:59:37.397 Must be German tourists. Short leather pants. 00:59:37.491 --> 00:59:38.698 Shut up! 00:59:38.950 --> 00:59:40.566 Tourists! Sailors! Wholesalers! 00:59:40.660 --> 00:59:41.946 I'd like to kill them all! 00:59:42.037 --> 00:59:44.245 Listen to him. Jack the Ripper. 00:59:44.664 --> 00:59:46.030 What am I going to do? 00:59:46.249 --> 00:59:48.366 Suppose there was just one man 00:59:48.919 --> 00:59:51.036 a rich customer who gave her 500 francs. 00:59:51.088 --> 00:59:52.499 Would that make you any happier? 00:59:52.547 --> 00:59:55.881 No! Maybe it would make me less miserable. 00:59:55.967 --> 00:59:59.005 How about Monsieur Barnathan, the goose-liver king? 00:59:59.054 --> 01:00:02.388 That nasty old man with the gout? She wouldn't like it. 01:00:02.474 --> 01:00:06.639 Monsieur Lionelli? Owns six restaurants. Comes every morning to do the marketing. 01:00:06.728 --> 01:00:09.812 - I don't know him. - A tall, dark young man, very good looking. 01:00:09.898 --> 01:00:11.560 I wouldn't like it. 01:00:14.736 --> 01:00:18.104 What about one of those Englishmen who drop in here? 01:00:19.574 --> 01:00:22.567 You know, Rolls-Royce, Oxford, Coldstream Guards? 01:00:22.744 --> 01:00:25.407 - They're harmless enough. - You don't understand. 01:00:25.455 --> 01:00:28.914 I don't want anybody to make love to her except me. 01:00:29.000 --> 01:00:30.912 Sentimental slob. 01:00:36.675 --> 01:00:38.667 I say there, old chap, l'addition. 01:00:38.885 --> 01:00:41.593 Two onion soups, a bottle of wine. 15 francs. 01:00:41.638 --> 01:00:43.504 Capital onion soup! Capital! 01:00:43.598 --> 01:00:46.215 Pity we don't have rubber pockets. 01:00:46.268 --> 01:00:48.601 We could smuggle some back to London. 01:00:55.277 --> 01:00:56.688 An Englishman? 01:00:58.280 --> 01:01:00.488 Maybe that wouldn't be such a bad idea. 01:01:00.782 --> 01:01:03.616 - It's worth a try. I say there... - No, no. 01:01:04.411 --> 01:01:06.949 Listen, Moustache, would you lend me 500 francs? 01:01:07.038 --> 01:01:09.280 - What for? - The perfect solution! 01:01:09.332 --> 01:01:11.665 You'll give me the money, I'll give it to Irma 01:01:11.751 --> 01:01:14.414 she'll give it to me, and I'll give it back to you! 01:01:14.462 --> 01:01:15.578 It's very simple, really. 01:01:15.630 --> 01:01:17.838 - What are you talking about? - Don't you see? 01:01:17.924 --> 01:01:20.917 Irma's going to have a rich lover, and it will be me! 01:01:22.053 --> 01:01:24.591 - You're mad! - Yes, I'm mad! 01:01:24.973 --> 01:01:28.967 I'm desperate. This is the only way out, and you're going to help me, you hear? 01:01:34.566 --> 01:01:36.478 All right. Let's hear it again. 01:01:36.693 --> 01:01:40.312 'The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain.' 01:01:40.447 --> 01:01:42.279 No, no. Through the nose. 01:01:42.324 --> 01:01:45.283 - The rain in Spain... - And show me some teeth! 01:01:45.327 --> 01:01:48.820 The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain. 01:01:48.955 --> 01:01:51.663 - By George, you haven't got it. - I haven't? 01:01:51.708 --> 01:01:54.166 To a lord, you wouldn't be a lord, but maybe to Irma. 01:01:54.211 --> 01:01:57.079 Don't worry. I've seen every English movie in town. I'm ready. 01:01:57.172 --> 01:02:00.756 - Hold still, your Lordship. - Tell me again, where is my castle? 01:02:00.842 --> 01:02:04.802 - In Worcestershire? - No. That's the sauce. In Yorkshire. 01:02:04.846 --> 01:02:06.087 I thought that was a pudding. 01:02:06.181 --> 01:02:08.719 I've done all I can. Now, let's see... 01:02:09.100 --> 01:02:10.261 Homburg, umbrella. 01:02:10.352 --> 01:02:13.516 - Where's my 500 francs? - You mean, my 500 francs. 01:02:14.147 --> 01:02:15.638 Thank you, old chip. 01:02:15.690 --> 01:02:18.057 Not old chip! Old chap! 01:02:18.485 --> 01:02:20.647 And not that way. On the lift! 01:02:20.695 --> 01:02:22.982 - On the what? - The elevator! 01:02:24.032 --> 01:02:27.116 Now then, shall we have a go at it? 01:02:27.869 --> 01:02:31.863 This may be the biggest setback for the British since Dunkirk. 01:02:32.040 --> 01:02:35.204 I know. I was there. Last man to be evacuated 01:02:35.710 --> 01:02:37.542 but that's another story. 01:03:34.769 --> 01:03:37.432 Hello, uncle. Looking for a little fun? 01:03:37.480 --> 01:03:40.097 - Quite. - Am I your type? 01:03:40.275 --> 01:03:42.938 Not quite. Cheerio, old chap. 01:03:43.403 --> 01:03:44.985 Got the time, mister? 01:03:45.363 --> 01:03:47.104 Indeed, but not the inclination. 01:03:49.784 --> 01:03:53.243 - Good show! - Anything I can do for you? 01:03:53.288 --> 01:03:55.996 No, thank you. Just browsing. 01:04:03.715 --> 01:04:07.504 I say there. Would you call that a miniature or a toy? 01:04:07.719 --> 01:04:10.462 That's not a toy! That's a real live dog. 01:04:10.638 --> 01:04:13.051 - I have a dog myself. - A poodle? 01:04:13.141 --> 01:04:17.351 No. A Hound of the Baskervilles. Magnificent beast. 01:04:18.229 --> 01:04:20.221 But then again, so are you. 01:04:21.149 --> 01:04:23.186 - You must be British. - Terribly so. 01:04:23.276 --> 01:04:26.485 Rolls-Royce, you know, oxfords, cold cream guards. 01:04:26.696 --> 01:04:29.484 Tell me, are you booked? 01:04:29.574 --> 01:04:30.655 No. 01:04:30.700 --> 01:04:33.283 In that case, shall we... I mean, would you... 01:04:33.328 --> 01:04:36.662 - That is, could we... - Why not? 01:05:01.189 --> 01:05:05.229 - What did you say your name was? - Irma. They call me Irma la Douce. 01:05:05.777 --> 01:05:09.942 If you don't mind, Miss la Douce, I'd rather not introduce myself. 01:05:10.240 --> 01:05:11.230 I don't mind. 01:05:11.324 --> 01:05:15.694 In my situation, a man must be discreet. You may call me, Lord X. 01:05:16.079 --> 01:05:17.536 Lord X. Sure. 01:05:18.039 --> 01:05:21.282 No, my dear. That shan't be necessary. 01:05:21.584 --> 01:05:23.041 What's the matter? 01:05:23.753 --> 01:05:27.167 All I really want is a bit of companionship. 01:05:27.215 --> 01:05:31.175 A shoulder to cry on, a smile to lean against. 01:05:35.557 --> 01:05:38.595 Say, what does that X stand for? X-centric? 01:05:40.478 --> 01:05:42.561 Let me ask you something, my dear. 01:05:43.189 --> 01:05:45.397 Do you find me repulsive? 01:05:45.984 --> 01:05:47.441 No. Not at all. 01:05:47.569 --> 01:05:49.902 You're rather nice looking, for a lord your age. 01:05:49.988 --> 01:05:53.277 Thank you. You see, my wife, Lady X, she does. 01:05:53.408 --> 01:05:54.398 Does what? 01:05:54.492 --> 01:05:59.283 Finds me repulsive, ignores me completely. Spends her time cultivating the garden 01:05:59.372 --> 01:06:00.954 and what's worse 01:06:01.291 --> 01:06:02.998 cultivating the gardener. 01:06:04.002 --> 01:06:06.745 - The gardener? - Yes, the other day, I was watching them 01:06:07.422 --> 01:06:09.254 from the turret of the castle. 01:06:09.424 --> 01:06:12.087 They were in the flowerbed together 01:06:12.719 --> 01:06:15.257 and he was pruning her begonias! 01:06:16.431 --> 01:06:17.717 They should be ashamed. 01:06:17.765 --> 01:06:21.930 It was such a jolly marriage, those first few years. 01:06:22.228 --> 01:06:26.768 We'd sit in front of the fire and play double solitaire 01:06:26.900 --> 01:06:28.562 and Chinese checkers. 01:06:28.735 --> 01:06:30.727 Solitaire? I play solitaire. 01:06:31.029 --> 01:06:33.942 Capital! Could we? That is, would you? 01:06:33.990 --> 01:06:35.697 I mean, shall we? 01:06:37.827 --> 01:06:41.537 - I don't care as long as you pay me. - Don't worry about the money. 01:06:41.623 --> 01:06:43.489 You take the red. I'll take the blue. 01:06:44.125 --> 01:06:46.208 I once knew a gentleman, used to bring me up here. 01:06:46.294 --> 01:06:50.629 All he'd do is scatter marbles on the floor and make me pick them up with my toes. 01:06:50.965 --> 01:06:52.001 How odd. 01:06:53.968 --> 01:06:56.301 - I never played double solitaire before. - Simple. 01:06:56.387 --> 01:06:58.424 All we do is play off on each other's aces. 01:07:06.481 --> 01:07:09.144 The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain, you know? 01:07:09.484 --> 01:07:12.272 - No, I didn't know. - It's a fact. Yeah. 01:07:12.487 --> 01:07:14.820 That's where I met my wife, in Spain. 01:07:15.907 --> 01:07:17.819 In the rain. In the plain? 01:07:17.909 --> 01:07:19.992 I was stationed in Gibraltar. 01:07:21.746 --> 01:07:23.658 Your wife, Lady X, is she beautiful? 01:07:23.748 --> 01:07:27.867 Very. And very passionate. So I can't really blame her. 01:07:28.211 --> 01:07:32.421 You see, I came back from the war a shattered man. 01:07:32.924 --> 01:07:36.668 - I was wondering about your eye. - A bit of detached retina. 01:07:36.844 --> 01:07:38.085 Happened at Navarone. 01:07:38.179 --> 01:07:41.047 Those beastly guns, popping off all the time. 01:07:41.182 --> 01:07:44.550 Have a silver plate in this elbow. Sink the Bismarck, that was. 01:07:45.144 --> 01:07:49.605 - I'm sorry. - One eye, one elbow, it's not tragic. 01:07:51.192 --> 01:07:53.400 What is tragic, however... 01:07:54.237 --> 01:07:56.194 I'd rather not talk about it. 01:07:57.031 --> 01:07:58.067 If you'd rather not. 01:07:58.157 --> 01:08:01.525 I was in a Japanese prison camp on the river Kwai. 01:08:02.203 --> 01:08:04.661 There was a rather nasty explosion. 01:08:06.124 --> 01:08:09.868 Whole ruddy bridge fell down on me! 01:08:12.630 --> 01:08:16.214 When they dug me up, I was only half a man 01:08:17.510 --> 01:08:19.126 a hollow shell. 01:08:21.764 --> 01:08:23.130 You've been through a lot, haven't you? 01:08:24.142 --> 01:08:28.557 Mad Dogs and Englishmen, with Lawrence in Arabia 01:08:28.605 --> 01:08:31.769 with Sherpa Tenzing up the Himalayas. 01:08:32.400 --> 01:08:35.734 And then there was The Charge of the Light Brigade. 01:08:35.820 --> 01:08:38.858 India, you know? Gunga Din... 01:08:38.906 --> 01:08:40.693 Bengal Lancers! Ta-ta! 01:08:41.576 --> 01:08:43.784 Yes, served under Commander Whitehead. 01:08:44.162 --> 01:08:47.371 And then there was the RAF and the BBC. 01:08:48.416 --> 01:08:50.078 Dunkirk! 01:08:50.460 --> 01:08:52.497 But that's another story. 01:09:10.647 --> 01:09:12.354 Have you seen Irma around? 01:09:13.816 --> 01:09:16.103 She's been up there since midnight. 01:09:16.152 --> 01:09:18.314 - That's six hours! - You should see this guy. 01:09:18.404 --> 01:09:20.111 He's an old goat with a beard. 01:09:20.281 --> 01:09:22.819 I didn't even think he'd make it up the stairs. 01:09:28.414 --> 01:09:31.623 - By George. I've done it again. - One more. 01:09:32.001 --> 01:09:33.412 I'm afraid not. 01:09:37.465 --> 01:09:41.379 I'd better dash to the airport if I'm not to miss my plane. 01:09:41.636 --> 01:09:45.129 - You know, it was rather fun for a change. - Thank you. 01:09:45.473 --> 01:09:47.135 There you are, my dear. 01:09:50.269 --> 01:09:51.805 You're very generous. 01:09:51.854 --> 01:09:53.971 Not really. Just filthy rich. 01:09:56.984 --> 01:09:59.067 How often do you come to Paris? 01:09:59.320 --> 01:10:01.152 Twice a week. Why? 01:10:02.198 --> 01:10:04.611 I was thinking, maybe we could do it again. 01:10:04.659 --> 01:10:07.697 Smashing! I was about to suggest some kind of arrangement. 01:10:07.787 --> 01:10:10.200 I'd like that. And so would Nestor. 01:10:10.331 --> 01:10:11.822 Yes. Who? 01:10:12.041 --> 01:10:13.577 The man I live with. 01:10:14.335 --> 01:10:17.499 And he doesn't mind that you come up here with strangers 01:10:18.923 --> 01:10:20.710 and pick up their marbles? 01:10:21.426 --> 01:10:23.167 Why? Business is business. 01:10:23.261 --> 01:10:24.843 Sensible attitude. 01:10:24.929 --> 01:10:27.342 The only thing he does object to is my smoking. 01:10:27.432 --> 01:10:30.516 I'm trying to quit. But it isn't easy. 01:10:31.477 --> 01:10:33.639 Then you must really love him. 01:10:37.775 --> 01:10:40.609 - Shall we go? - Just a second. 01:10:40.695 --> 01:10:42.436 Where's my other shoe? 01:10:42.530 --> 01:10:43.862 My other shoe. 01:10:45.241 --> 01:10:48.405 I'm sorry, I really must catch my plane 01:10:49.036 --> 01:10:52.325 or Lady X and that wretched gardener will be running amok. 01:10:52.373 --> 01:10:56.037 - See you Thursday. Same time and place? - I'll be waiting. 01:10:59.172 --> 01:11:00.162 Cheery-bye. 01:11:05.386 --> 01:11:06.877 This is our lucky night! 01:11:07.054 --> 01:11:08.920 Wait till I tell Nestor. 01:11:10.141 --> 01:11:12.884 All right, what did you do with my shoe? 01:11:23.070 --> 01:11:26.063 Would you give this to the young lady in Room 9? 01:11:26.157 --> 01:11:28.444 Somehow it wound up in my pocket. 01:11:30.745 --> 01:11:32.031 Old goat! 01:12:34.392 --> 01:12:35.758 How did it go? 01:12:35.977 --> 01:12:37.138 You'd have been proud. 01:12:37.228 --> 01:12:39.390 What a performance. Like Sir Laurence Oliver. 01:12:39.522 --> 01:12:42.811 Laurence Olivier! Now watch your ascot. 01:12:42.984 --> 01:12:44.145 My what? 01:12:45.903 --> 01:12:47.235 Nestor! 01:12:48.114 --> 01:12:49.400 Nestor! 01:12:49.490 --> 01:12:50.480 Nestor! 01:12:50.533 --> 01:12:52.775 It happened! We hit the jackpot! 01:12:53.995 --> 01:12:55.031 What? What jackpot? 01:12:55.121 --> 01:12:56.407 I found him! 01:12:56.998 --> 01:12:59.365 And he's got a castle, comes here twice a week. 01:12:59.458 --> 01:13:00.665 Who? Calm down. 01:13:00.710 --> 01:13:03.919 He's English, he's a lord, and I'll see him again on Thursday. 01:13:04.005 --> 01:13:06.338 And he's filthy rich. You know how much he gave me? 01:13:06.382 --> 01:13:07.498 How would I know? 01:13:07.675 --> 01:13:09.632 Come on. Make a guess. 01:13:10.011 --> 01:13:11.502 500 francs! 01:13:13.180 --> 01:13:15.797 - Here. - How about that! 01:13:17.560 --> 01:13:19.722 500 francs! What did you have to do for it? 01:13:19.812 --> 01:13:21.599 - Nothing! - Come on! 01:13:21.689 --> 01:13:24.022 - He taught me a new game. - What kind? 01:13:24.108 --> 01:13:26.225 - He beat me nine times. - That's more like it. 01:13:26.402 --> 01:13:28.689 He used to play with his wife, but she won't anymore. 01:13:28.738 --> 01:13:30.604 She's got something with the gardener. 01:13:32.074 --> 01:13:35.192 It's 500 francs, all right. Later. 01:13:38.039 --> 01:13:39.029 Tiger! 01:13:39.457 --> 01:13:40.698 Can we see you for a minute? 01:13:40.791 --> 01:13:43.033 Certainly! What's on your mind, boys? 01:13:43.085 --> 01:13:45.168 Congratulations! You made it! 01:13:46.047 --> 01:13:47.538 I didn't really do anything. 01:13:47.590 --> 01:13:49.047 We've been talking it over 01:13:49.091 --> 01:13:52.880 and since you're numero uno around here, we've elected you president. 01:13:52.929 --> 01:13:54.215 President? Of what? 01:13:54.305 --> 01:13:57.298 - Local 27 of the MPPA. - MPP... 01:13:57.391 --> 01:14:00.680 Mecs of Paris Protective Association. 01:14:00.728 --> 01:14:03.220 - Me? - It was unanimous. 01:14:03.648 --> 01:14:05.310 That's a great honor. 01:14:05.399 --> 01:14:07.231 I'm sure you could find someone more... 01:14:07.276 --> 01:14:10.485 We accept! I'm so proud of you. 01:14:11.238 --> 01:14:13.195 Champagne for everybody! 01:14:22.124 --> 01:14:23.740 Free champagne! 01:14:42.687 --> 01:14:44.349 Vive Nestor! 01:14:44.438 --> 01:14:47.806 Vive! Vive! Vive! 01:15:01.122 --> 01:15:02.613 I'm so happy! 01:15:03.165 --> 01:15:05.202 From now on, it's just the three of us. 01:15:05.292 --> 01:15:07.579 - You and me and the lord. - Yeah. 01:15:10.631 --> 01:15:12.873 Let's see. 500 francs each time. 01:15:13.134 --> 01:15:17.128 That's 1,000 francs a week. With 52 weeks in a year, that makes... 01:15:17.596 --> 01:15:19.462 Darling, can I have 100 francs? 01:15:19.640 --> 01:15:20.847 Sure! 01:15:21.976 --> 01:15:23.012 It's for a hair dryer. 01:15:23.102 --> 01:15:25.890 Here's another 100. Get some curtains, too. 01:15:26.272 --> 01:15:27.729 Why are you so good to me? 01:15:27.982 --> 01:15:31.771 I just believe in fair dealings between labor and management. 01:15:45.291 --> 01:15:47.078 Come on, Nestor, le twist. 01:15:47.585 --> 01:15:51.329 Hands off, Lolita! He doesn't twist with anybody but me. 01:15:51.380 --> 01:15:53.463 Get her! Mrs. President! 01:15:54.633 --> 01:15:56.215 Let's dance. 01:17:20.845 --> 01:17:23.929 - Want to pay for the champagne now? - I didn't order it. 01:17:23.973 --> 01:17:27.842 President pays when he's inaugurated. It's a custom. 270 francs, please. 01:17:28.102 --> 01:17:29.263 - 270... - Nine bottles. 01:17:29.311 --> 01:17:31.143 Eight for the gang, one for her. 01:17:31.939 --> 01:17:33.225 She had a whole bottle? 01:17:33.274 --> 01:17:36.187 How do you think she got those kidney stones? 01:17:38.237 --> 01:17:40.320 That went fast. 01:17:40.406 --> 01:17:42.113 Now what about my 500? 01:17:43.242 --> 01:17:45.780 You know, this isn't working out the way we figured. 01:17:45.870 --> 01:17:48.954 The way you figured. I told you it was economically unsound. 01:17:49.290 --> 01:17:51.577 You'll just have to advance Lord X another 500 01:17:51.625 --> 01:17:55.665 - when he comes back next Thursday. - No. Not me. 01:17:55.963 --> 01:17:57.454 How am I going to pay Irma? 01:17:57.548 --> 01:17:59.505 You'll just have to mortgage your castle. 01:17:59.675 --> 01:18:02.088 Or pick some pockets or rob a bank. 01:18:02.261 --> 01:18:05.379 I once knocked over a bank in Bordeaux. It was my father's bank. 01:18:05.472 --> 01:18:07.304 - But that's... - Shut up! 01:18:08.976 --> 01:18:11.969 Bit of a sticky wicket, isn't it, your Lordship? 01:18:40.174 --> 01:18:41.460 Dis donc! 01:19:02.071 --> 01:19:03.312 Irma? 01:19:13.040 --> 01:19:14.030 Irma? 01:20:03.424 --> 01:20:04.540 Come on. 01:24:46.748 --> 01:24:49.912 - Good morning, darling. - Good morning. 01:24:50.002 --> 01:24:51.959 - Did I wake you? - No. 01:24:55.090 --> 01:24:57.207 It looks like a beautiful day! 01:24:59.136 --> 01:25:02.675 I feel so spoiled and so lazy. 01:25:03.223 --> 01:25:06.387 Do you realize I don't have a thing to do until Thursday? 01:25:06.435 --> 01:25:09.394 - What's Thursday? - When Lord X comes again. 01:25:09.980 --> 01:25:11.391 You know what let's do? 01:25:11.440 --> 01:25:14.399 Let's rent a tandem bicycle, and ride out to the country. 01:25:14.443 --> 01:25:17.686 - Trees and grass and fresh air. - Not today. 01:25:17.738 --> 01:25:20.446 Or we could go to the Bois and you can row us around the lake. 01:25:20.532 --> 01:25:24.025 - Maybe next week. - Then we don't really have to do anything. 01:25:24.077 --> 01:25:27.070 - We could stay in bed all day. - I'd like that. 01:25:31.460 --> 01:25:34.874 - You want your breakfast now or later? - Much later. 01:25:41.428 --> 01:25:43.294 I've got a surprise for you. 01:25:44.681 --> 01:25:47.264 - Close your eyes. - Thank you. 01:25:51.355 --> 01:25:55.190 When I was at the department store buying the curtains, I saw this. 01:25:55.275 --> 01:25:57.267 And you know how I feel about green. 01:25:57.319 --> 01:25:59.436 So I tried it on. There was a riot. 01:25:59.613 --> 01:26:04.028 Three of the salesmen got trampled. So naturally, I just had to have it. 01:26:04.284 --> 01:26:08.494 Now, don't open your eyes yet. I want you to see it against the light. 01:26:11.124 --> 01:26:13.662 All right. You can look now. 01:26:15.837 --> 01:26:17.419 Nestor? 01:26:21.301 --> 01:26:22.587 Nestor! 01:26:27.933 --> 01:26:29.049 Nestor! 01:26:29.101 --> 01:26:32.014 Not today. Maybe next week? 01:26:36.024 --> 01:26:37.390 All right. 01:26:38.276 --> 01:26:40.814 If that's the way you feel about it. 01:27:54.394 --> 01:27:57.762 - My dear girl! - I was afraid you wouldn't show up. 01:27:57.856 --> 01:28:01.020 Almost didn't. Ran into a bit of dirty weather over the Channel. 01:28:01.067 --> 01:28:03.901 Unusually foggy for July. 01:28:10.577 --> 01:28:13.570 - What is it, my dear? - You've changed somehow. 01:28:13.663 --> 01:28:15.950 Have I? How? 01:28:16.958 --> 01:28:20.542 That patch. Shouldn't it be on the other eye? 01:28:22.756 --> 01:28:23.917 Indeed! 01:28:23.965 --> 01:28:26.082 No wonder it was so foggy! 01:28:29.387 --> 01:28:31.879 I've been practicing. I'll be better tonight. 01:28:31.932 --> 01:28:34.424 Let's get at it then, shall we? 01:28:38.271 --> 01:28:40.137 Old goat! 01:28:53.829 --> 01:28:55.695 How are things at home? 01:28:55.831 --> 01:28:59.199 - I mean, how's Lady X? - Her usual self. 01:28:59.793 --> 01:29:01.250 How's the gardener? 01:29:01.670 --> 01:29:02.751 It finally happened. 01:29:02.796 --> 01:29:05.163 - Caught them at it in the greenhouse. - No. 01:29:05.257 --> 01:29:07.499 I threw them out, pulled up the drawbridge 01:29:07.592 --> 01:29:09.254 and started divorce proceedings. 01:29:09.761 --> 01:29:10.877 That's too bad. 01:29:10.971 --> 01:29:14.464 Catastrophe! Best damn gardener I ever had. 01:29:16.101 --> 01:29:18.263 Must be lonely for you now at the castle. 01:29:18.311 --> 01:29:20.303 Very. Especially at night. 01:29:20.480 --> 01:29:24.770 Just me and the family ghosts spooking around those 96 rooms. 01:29:25.569 --> 01:29:28.653 - How many? - Not to mention the 400 acres 01:29:28.738 --> 01:29:33.608 and the croquet field, the trout hatchery and all the horses. 01:29:33.827 --> 01:29:36.695 I breed trotters and pacers. Separate stables, you know. 01:29:38.748 --> 01:29:41.832 I imagine there must be lots of trees and grass and a brook? 01:29:41.918 --> 01:29:46.037 And swans and peacocks and unicorns. 01:29:47.132 --> 01:29:51.126 It sounds like a great place for Coquette. I'd like to get her out of the city. 01:29:52.637 --> 01:29:54.845 - She drinks, you know. - Really? 01:29:55.432 --> 01:29:58.015 I keep finding empty bottles under the bed. 01:30:00.020 --> 01:30:03.263 Love to invite you to the castle, both of you 01:30:03.315 --> 01:30:07.650 but I'm sure you wouldn't dream of leaving your young man. 01:30:09.779 --> 01:30:11.020 No, I guess not. 01:30:11.948 --> 01:30:13.860 Although sometimes, I wonder. 01:30:14.034 --> 01:30:16.572 About what? Is something troubling you? 01:30:16.953 --> 01:30:20.412 Suddenly, he seems so different. I mean, so indifferent. 01:30:20.498 --> 01:30:23.115 He's always tired, not interested in me at all. 01:30:24.377 --> 01:30:26.460 I'm sure there must be some explanation. 01:30:27.380 --> 01:30:29.121 I think he has another girl. 01:30:29.674 --> 01:30:33.543 That's ridiculous! Why would anybody with a girl like you... 01:30:33.637 --> 01:30:36.630 Somebody ought to give that young man a good talking to. 01:30:36.890 --> 01:30:39.507 - Would you like to meet him? - Meet him? 01:30:40.018 --> 01:30:42.351 He's waiting in the bistro across the street. 01:30:42.395 --> 01:30:47.060 - I really ought to be getting to the airport. - It'll only take a minute. 01:30:47.108 --> 01:30:50.522 - Come on, we'll buy you a drink. - Thank you, but, no thank you. 01:30:50.570 --> 01:30:52.857 I mean, while I'm getting my divorce 01:30:52.906 --> 01:30:55.614 we really shouldn't be seen with each other. 01:30:55.700 --> 01:30:57.817 Yes, you must be careful. 01:30:58.203 --> 01:31:00.570 Maybe we shouldn't leave the hotel together. 01:31:00.664 --> 01:31:02.405 Capital suggestion! 01:31:03.124 --> 01:31:05.457 Shall we rendezvous again next Monday? 01:31:05.710 --> 01:31:07.576 Of course. 01:31:08.672 --> 01:31:11.005 I don't feel right about this. 01:31:13.051 --> 01:31:15.714 It's taking money under false pretenses. 01:31:16.096 --> 01:31:19.806 - After all, I don't do anything for you. - Balderdash! 01:31:19.891 --> 01:31:24.352 If it weren't for our arrangement, I should go straight through the ceiling. 01:31:24.479 --> 01:31:27.222 Of course, it must be very boring for you. 01:31:27.273 --> 01:31:29.310 Not at all. I enjoy it. 01:31:31.236 --> 01:31:33.444 You've made me a very happy man. 01:31:34.739 --> 01:31:36.571 Half-man, I should say. 01:31:38.868 --> 01:31:40.609 Ta-ta! 01:31:42.747 --> 01:31:44.113 Toodle-oo. 01:31:44.791 --> 01:31:45.998 And tallyho. 01:31:54.509 --> 01:31:57.047 Up! Get up, you lush! 01:31:58.805 --> 01:32:01.263 Look at those circles under your eyes. 01:32:01.516 --> 01:32:05.226 Carry on like this, and we'll have to have your face lifted. 01:32:15.447 --> 01:32:18.406 Say, you're the Englishman that's seeing Irma. 01:32:18.450 --> 01:32:21.784 - I don't believe we've been introduced. - I'm Hippolyte the Ox. 01:32:21.953 --> 01:32:23.910 What is on your mind, Mr. Ox? 01:32:24.456 --> 01:32:28.951 I thought if you're interested in something new, something more unusual... 01:32:29.461 --> 01:32:30.668 Twins, you know. 01:32:30.837 --> 01:32:34.751 What? Play three-handed solitaire? No, thanks. 01:33:01.326 --> 01:33:02.862 Order! 01:33:03.536 --> 01:33:05.949 Come on, everybody. It's getting late! 01:33:06.498 --> 01:33:08.785 - Let's take a vote. - All right. 01:33:09.209 --> 01:33:10.495 The motion on the floor 01:33:10.585 --> 01:33:13.328 is that every girl contributes a day's earnings a week 01:33:13.379 --> 01:33:15.086 toward our pension fund. 01:33:15.173 --> 01:33:16.664 All those in favor... 01:33:16.716 --> 01:33:17.832 - Aye! - Aye! 01:33:17.884 --> 01:33:19.841 Aye! 01:33:20.762 --> 01:33:22.469 Carried unanimously! 01:33:22.806 --> 01:33:26.049 Okay, girls. Let's have it. 01:33:33.733 --> 01:33:36.897 - I'm back, Nestor. - That was a rough meeting. 01:33:37.070 --> 01:33:38.106 Here you are. 01:33:38.363 --> 01:33:39.353 Thank you. 01:33:40.323 --> 01:33:41.484 Thank you. 01:33:42.325 --> 01:33:44.612 - What's that for? - You just voted for it. 01:33:44.702 --> 01:33:46.318 It's for the pension fund. 01:33:47.497 --> 01:33:50.661 Just part of my program. Now that I'm President 01:33:50.708 --> 01:33:53.121 I'm going to get this organization moving ahead. 01:33:57.132 --> 01:34:01.547 - How did it go with his Lordship? - Fine. I'm beginning to like him a lot. 01:34:01.719 --> 01:34:05.087 It's a good thing the bridge fell on him. I might be jealous. Cognac. 01:34:05.265 --> 01:34:07.052 Pernod for me. Nothing for her. 01:34:07.767 --> 01:34:08.883 He's getting a divorce. 01:34:08.935 --> 01:34:11.018 Maybe now he can come see me more often. 01:34:11.271 --> 01:34:13.228 More often? I doubt it. 01:34:13.273 --> 01:34:16.732 - Where would he get the money? - He's got this big estate. 01:34:17.152 --> 01:34:20.020 You know what the taxes are on a big estate in England? 01:34:20.113 --> 01:34:23.072 Some of those lords have to scrounge around for a living. 01:34:30.039 --> 01:34:34.033 If he saw me three times a week, that's 1,500 francs. 01:34:34.502 --> 01:34:36.118 I could buy you a car! 01:34:37.297 --> 01:34:38.788 One of those sports models. 01:34:38.882 --> 01:34:42.341 Kiki thinks she's such a hotshot because she got her guy a motor scooter. 01:34:43.636 --> 01:34:47.425 Wait till they see you driving around with the top down. 01:34:47.640 --> 01:34:49.802 And I'm gonna get you a little cap to go with it. 01:34:49.893 --> 01:34:51.304 What are you doing? 01:34:53.104 --> 01:34:57.189 - He's trying to get the lipstick off. - Lipstick? Where did that come from? 01:34:57.317 --> 01:34:59.775 - That's a good question. - It must have been you. 01:34:59.819 --> 01:35:01.731 - That's it. - Me? 01:35:01.779 --> 01:35:03.987 I was in the hotel with his Lordship. 01:35:04.157 --> 01:35:05.443 That's not it. 01:35:06.618 --> 01:35:09.986 Yes. It was at the board meeting. We were taking a vote 01:35:10.079 --> 01:35:12.287 and one of the girls was doing a little lobbying. 01:35:12.749 --> 01:35:14.035 That must be it. 01:35:14.500 --> 01:35:18.244 Just which girl was doing a little lobbying? 01:35:21.341 --> 01:35:23.333 Come on, Tiger. How about it? 01:35:27.847 --> 01:35:29.588 You dropped something. 01:35:30.225 --> 01:35:31.386 Where? 01:35:32.477 --> 01:35:33.809 There! 01:35:42.195 --> 01:35:44.152 Now, please, look, girls... 01:35:44.530 --> 01:35:46.021 This is... 01:35:54.832 --> 01:35:56.869 Now, I'm the president here. 01:36:02.674 --> 01:36:05.838 That's enough. Let's shake hands and make up. 01:36:12.392 --> 01:36:13.974 Now, girls! 01:36:25.405 --> 01:36:27.362 No. You wouldn't. You... 01:37:58.915 --> 01:38:00.156 Good morning, Tiger. 01:38:00.249 --> 01:38:02.411 How about some breakfast? Fresh croissants. 01:38:02.502 --> 01:38:05.620 - No, I better get back before she wakes up. - You look terrible. 01:38:05.671 --> 01:38:09.665 - You must've lost 10 pounds. - 15. I weighed myself on the meat scale. 01:38:09.759 --> 01:38:11.625 What do you expect? Night after night 01:38:11.719 --> 01:38:13.711 loading, unloading, in and out the window 01:38:13.805 --> 01:38:17.515 on with the beard, off with the beard. You're going to fall apart, kid. 01:38:17.600 --> 01:38:19.933 I don't care so long as I keep her off the streets. 01:38:20.019 --> 01:38:22.762 It's a hard way to earn an easy living. 01:38:47.380 --> 01:38:48.712 Nestor? 01:39:44.645 --> 01:39:48.730 You know, Irma, I'm a little bit disappointed in you. 01:39:49.734 --> 01:39:53.227 You promised me you wouldn't smoke anymore. 01:39:56.782 --> 01:39:59.149 Aren't you going to say anything? 01:40:01.746 --> 01:40:05.239 I suppose you're wondering where I was. 01:40:05.583 --> 01:40:07.495 I know where you were. 01:40:07.752 --> 01:40:10.495 - You do? - You were out with the boys. 01:40:10.713 --> 01:40:12.454 Yeah. That's right. 01:40:12.673 --> 01:40:14.130 Don't lie to me! 01:40:14.217 --> 01:40:17.551 - Where was I? - You were out with Lolita. 01:40:18.930 --> 01:40:21.092 That's right. That's just... 01:40:21.182 --> 01:40:23.014 Let me go to bed. I'm very tired. 01:40:23.100 --> 01:40:26.559 - You've been with her every night. - No, I haven't. 01:40:26.938 --> 01:40:29.055 No, not every night. 01:40:29.106 --> 01:40:32.770 Sometimes I was with Amazon Annie 01:40:32.902 --> 01:40:35.485 and sometimes, with Mimi the MauMau 01:40:35.947 --> 01:40:38.155 and sometimes, with the twins. 01:40:40.159 --> 01:40:42.526 They all want me to handle them. 01:40:42.787 --> 01:40:45.325 So I've decided to branch out, you know? 01:40:45.414 --> 01:40:48.703 Business is business, and don't you forget 01:40:49.293 --> 01:40:52.502 around here, I'm numero uno! 01:40:53.923 --> 01:40:55.789 You make me sick! 01:40:58.302 --> 01:41:00.635 What are you going to do about it? 01:41:06.852 --> 01:41:10.220 This is what you came with. Now get out! 01:41:12.900 --> 01:41:14.641 You're not throwing me out. 01:41:15.403 --> 01:41:18.111 - Because you're crazy about me! - Let go! 01:41:18.155 --> 01:41:19.987 Going to buy me a new car, remember? 01:41:20.032 --> 01:41:21.989 - And a sports cap. - Let go! 01:41:22.034 --> 01:41:26.449 And when you buy me the sports cap, I want it with a little strap in the back. 01:41:27.623 --> 01:41:29.364 That's what you'll get from me! 01:41:29.458 --> 01:41:32.792 Let those other girls work for you and see how well you do! 01:41:32.837 --> 01:41:36.672 You think you're numero uno. I'm numero uno. 01:41:36.757 --> 01:41:40.216 Go outside on the street and ask the first man you see. 01:41:40.303 --> 01:41:42.511 Ask anybody! 01:41:56.611 --> 01:41:58.273 I'm sorry. It's... 01:42:18.382 --> 01:42:21.966 Well, here we are in the seventh inning, two outs, Maury Wills on first. 01:42:22.053 --> 01:42:24.420 Ballgame coming to you direct from Los Angeles 01:42:24.513 --> 01:42:29.383 over the American Forces Network. Marichal on the rubber, into a stretch. 01:42:29.435 --> 01:42:31.176 Here's the pitch, and there he goes! 01:42:31.228 --> 01:42:34.187 The throw down to second base is not in time! 01:42:34.565 --> 01:42:36.431 He's stolen another one! 01:42:58.339 --> 01:42:59.500 Hello. 01:42:59.757 --> 01:43:02.500 Here you are. I was afraid you mightn't show. 01:43:02.593 --> 01:43:05.711 I lost track of time. I've been walking the streets all day. 01:43:06.097 --> 01:43:07.213 Thinking. 01:43:07.973 --> 01:43:10.135 There's something I'd like to discuss with you. 01:43:10.226 --> 01:43:12.639 - By all means. - Not here. 01:43:13.771 --> 01:43:15.854 I don't want Nestor to know. 01:43:16.148 --> 01:43:20.188 Let's not take any chances. Shall we go up to your office? 01:43:35.292 --> 01:43:38.785 Now then, my dear, what is it that's so important? 01:43:40.005 --> 01:43:42.042 Did you mean what you said the other night? 01:43:42.133 --> 01:43:44.216 Indeed. What did I say? 01:43:44.301 --> 01:43:46.793 About taking me to England with you. 01:43:48.472 --> 01:43:50.589 Of course I meant it, if I said it. 01:43:50.641 --> 01:43:54.430 And if you say so, I must have said it, and meant it. 01:43:54.478 --> 01:43:56.390 - I'm ready. - But you can't go! 01:43:56.480 --> 01:43:58.642 What about Nestor or whatever his name is? 01:43:58.858 --> 01:44:01.817 Nestor, Hippolyte, Marcel... It doesn't matter. 01:44:01.861 --> 01:44:04.069 Sooner or later, they all give you a bad time. 01:44:04.155 --> 01:44:05.316 The brutes. 01:44:05.698 --> 01:44:09.282 - If you want me to go with you... - It's a bit of a sticky wicket. 01:44:10.828 --> 01:44:13.662 If it's awkward, I don't want to embarrass you. 01:44:13.706 --> 01:44:16.699 Not at all, my dear. I'd be delighted. 01:44:16.792 --> 01:44:18.499 It's just... 01:44:19.503 --> 01:44:22.496 There's this ghastly servant problem right now 01:44:22.590 --> 01:44:25.424 and the castle's overrun with plumbers. 01:44:25.509 --> 01:44:27.171 Moat is leaking. 01:44:27.762 --> 01:44:32.223 Besides, I'm a shattered man. I'd be of no use to you. 01:44:34.560 --> 01:44:35.846 Are you sure? 01:44:36.854 --> 01:44:39.847 Matter of fact, I'm on my way to Zurich now. 01:44:39.940 --> 01:44:42.148 I wasn't planning to go back to England. 01:44:42.193 --> 01:44:45.527 Going to consult a Swiss doctor, a specialist. 01:44:46.405 --> 01:44:49.944 That's a waste of time. They can't help you. 01:44:50.034 --> 01:44:53.198 I once knew a specialist. Used to send some of his patients to me. 01:44:53.245 --> 01:44:55.362 - To you? - The tough cases. 01:44:55.498 --> 01:44:58.832 Poor guys. Thought they'd run out of gas, but they were just stalled. 01:44:58.876 --> 01:45:01.914 - All they needed was a little push. - A push? 01:45:02.046 --> 01:45:05.130 I mean mentally, to stimulate their imagination. 01:45:06.258 --> 01:45:09.217 - It's all up here, you know. - I wish it were. 01:45:09.261 --> 01:45:12.550 I had one patient given up as hopeless until I started telling him 01:45:12.598 --> 01:45:14.214 about the South Seas. 01:45:14.308 --> 01:45:17.517 The South Seas. What a curious gambit. 01:45:17.728 --> 01:45:19.060 It worked. 01:45:22.733 --> 01:45:24.816 - Lie down. - I beg your pardon? 01:45:24.902 --> 01:45:26.564 Stretch out. Relax. 01:45:29.073 --> 01:45:32.066 Close your eyes. I mean, your eye. 01:45:34.912 --> 01:45:37.575 - No tricks now. - I promise. 01:45:41.919 --> 01:45:43.535 You're in Tahiti. 01:45:43.838 --> 01:45:45.670 - All right? - Tahiti. 01:45:45.756 --> 01:45:48.499 Yes! I've been there with Captain Bligh. 01:45:48.592 --> 01:45:52.006 - Mutiny on the Bounty! - Down, Lord. 01:45:54.223 --> 01:45:55.805 Now concentrate. 01:46:04.984 --> 01:46:07.647 Palm trees swaying in the breeze. 01:46:08.988 --> 01:46:10.980 The smell of ripe papayas. 01:46:11.407 --> 01:46:13.865 A blue lagoon, white sand. 01:46:14.451 --> 01:46:16.443 Golden-skinned girls. 01:46:17.621 --> 01:46:19.283 Have you got that? 01:46:19.748 --> 01:46:24.038 Blue lagoon, white sand, golden skin... 01:46:25.129 --> 01:46:27.166 They're beautiful, aren't they? 01:46:27.256 --> 01:46:28.872 Are they ever! 01:46:28.966 --> 01:46:30.707 How many do you see? 01:46:32.553 --> 01:46:35.136 Fourteen, to be exact. 01:46:35.180 --> 01:46:37.388 They're wearing grass skirts and coconut shells. 01:46:37.474 --> 01:46:39.340 - No, they're not. - They're not? 01:46:39.768 --> 01:46:43.978 They're wearing sarongs and hibiscus blossoms in their hair. 01:46:46.942 --> 01:46:49.229 Yes. By George, you're right. 01:46:49.945 --> 01:46:54.690 Now they take off their sarongs, and start washing them in the blue lagoon. 01:46:56.285 --> 01:46:58.026 Indeed! They... 01:47:00.247 --> 01:47:01.863 Look, it's no use. 01:47:01.957 --> 01:47:04.415 I mean, I really am out of gas... Petrol. 01:47:04.668 --> 01:47:06.705 The tank is completely dry. 01:47:06.921 --> 01:47:09.538 All right. Let's forget Tahiti. Lie back. 01:47:16.472 --> 01:47:18.134 You're in Baghdad. 01:47:18.515 --> 01:47:20.507 Baghdad? Now, how did I get there? 01:47:28.776 --> 01:47:30.517 You're in a bazaar. 01:47:32.321 --> 01:47:34.187 You see an exotic woman 01:47:34.615 --> 01:47:36.652 with a veil across her face. 01:47:36.742 --> 01:47:39.951 Big, black almond eyes. 01:47:40.996 --> 01:47:42.112 She winks at you. 01:47:43.040 --> 01:47:46.283 You follow her. She disappears into a palace. 01:47:47.086 --> 01:47:49.874 There are two Nubian slaves standing guard 01:47:49.922 --> 01:47:51.413 so you climb over the wall. 01:47:52.633 --> 01:47:54.625 - How high? - Ten feet. 01:47:54.718 --> 01:47:57.836 - I'll never make it! - Try! You must try! 01:47:57.888 --> 01:48:01.757 I'm trying! Broken glass on the top! 01:48:01.892 --> 01:48:04.976 - Are you over? - Just barely. 01:48:05.354 --> 01:48:06.435 Good. 01:48:07.523 --> 01:48:10.357 Now, you're inside the harem. 01:48:12.111 --> 01:48:14.228 You're lying on silk pillows. 01:48:15.572 --> 01:48:17.063 Odalisques are fanning you. 01:48:18.742 --> 01:48:20.734 They're feeding you grapes 01:48:22.079 --> 01:48:23.945 painting your toenails 01:48:25.457 --> 01:48:28.950 while she does the dance of the seven veils. 01:48:31.338 --> 01:48:35.423 She takes off the fourth veil. 01:48:37.052 --> 01:48:38.088 The fifth. 01:48:39.471 --> 01:48:40.837 The sixth. 01:49:01.827 --> 01:49:04.661 You will be gentle, won't you? 01:49:21.472 --> 01:49:23.054 Your Lordship? 01:49:30.606 --> 01:49:32.848 Are you all right, your Lordship? 01:49:36.528 --> 01:49:40.317 I will be as soon as I pull myself together. 01:49:43.327 --> 01:49:46.570 You know, I think Lady X must have been out of her mind. 01:49:46.747 --> 01:49:50.661 With you in the house, why would she go puttering around in the garden? 01:49:50.959 --> 01:49:55.374 - How kind of you to say so. - When does our plane leave for London? 01:49:55.672 --> 01:49:59.165 - Eight o'clock. - I'd better go home and pack. 01:50:01.303 --> 01:50:05.468 Look, I'm afraid I can't take you to my castle in Worcestershire. 01:50:05.557 --> 01:50:06.638 Why not? 01:50:06.683 --> 01:50:09.801 Because I don't have a castle in Worcestershire. 01:50:10.270 --> 01:50:12.853 Of course not. It's in Yorkshire. 01:50:13.982 --> 01:50:17.646 Quite, but, what I mean to say... 01:50:17.861 --> 01:50:21.696 I haven't been entirely frank with you, my dear. 01:50:21.740 --> 01:50:22.730 You haven't? 01:50:22.866 --> 01:50:27.531 For instance, what I told you about the unicorns... 01:50:27.704 --> 01:50:30.071 There are no unicorns. 01:50:30.374 --> 01:50:31.615 So what? 01:50:32.543 --> 01:50:34.830 So she'll play with the peacocks. 01:50:34.878 --> 01:50:36.710 And don't worry about the servant problem. 01:50:36.797 --> 01:50:39.881 I'll cook for you, I'll serve you tea in the afternoon, 01:50:39.925 --> 01:50:41.917 I'll knit you sweaters. 01:50:43.011 --> 01:50:45.048 I can be ready in 20 minutes. 01:50:45.139 --> 01:50:47.381 I'll meet you at the bistro across the street. 01:50:47.474 --> 01:50:49.511 Chez Moustache, all right? 01:50:50.644 --> 01:50:52.226 Are you there? 01:50:54.064 --> 01:50:55.396 Your Lordship? 01:50:55.899 --> 01:50:59.233 Yes, I'm there. I mean, I'm here. 01:51:00.362 --> 01:51:02.069 And I'll be there. 01:51:02.865 --> 01:51:04.322 The bistro. 01:51:08.078 --> 01:51:09.410 And one more thing. 01:51:09.454 --> 01:51:11.571 Keep away from Nestor. He's vicious! 01:51:11.748 --> 01:51:14.365 They don't call him "Tiger" for nothing. 01:51:54.374 --> 01:51:57.458 I say there, this is a bit of a jolly surprise. 01:51:57.920 --> 01:52:01.129 - What'll it be, your Lordship? - Don't mention that swine to me. 01:52:01.215 --> 01:52:03.923 Do you know what they've been doing behind my back? 01:52:03.967 --> 01:52:06.755 - What? - Shattered man, my eye! 01:52:06.970 --> 01:52:09.007 - They're going to England together! - Who? 01:52:09.097 --> 01:52:11.339 Irma and the lord! She's packing now. 01:52:11.475 --> 01:52:13.683 She's going to walk out on me! Nestor! 01:52:13.769 --> 01:52:15.431 He's taking her to his castle. 01:52:15.479 --> 01:52:17.812 She's going to make tea and knit him sweaters. 01:52:17.898 --> 01:52:19.855 - You're talking crazy. - They won't get away with it. 01:52:19.942 --> 01:52:24.152 I'll kill him first, I'll tear him apart and throw him in the Seine. 01:52:29.493 --> 01:52:31.530 There is no lord. 01:52:32.788 --> 01:52:34.495 - There isn't? - That's right. 01:52:35.374 --> 01:52:38.162 How do you like that phony? He's been lying to her. 01:52:38.293 --> 01:52:40.910 What do you mean, "He"? There is no "He." It's you! 01:52:41.004 --> 01:52:43.087 Of course, but she doesn't know that. 01:52:43.173 --> 01:52:45.039 And she doesn't know that I know. 01:52:45.133 --> 01:52:48.672 But I know that she likes him better than she likes me. 01:52:48.845 --> 01:52:49.926 See? 01:52:50.722 --> 01:52:53.510 She wouldn't even take any money from him. 01:52:54.518 --> 01:52:56.009 You'd better have a drink. 01:52:56.103 --> 01:52:59.187 The world isn't big enough for the two of us. 01:52:59.940 --> 01:53:03.354 Lord X is going to walk down the street and disappear forever. 01:53:03.527 --> 01:53:08.147 - Nobody's ever going to see him again. - I didn't want to see him in the first place. 01:53:08.198 --> 01:53:11.362 - Get my other clothes, will you? - Coming up. 01:53:22.587 --> 01:53:24.499 Somebody ought to warn him. 01:53:24.548 --> 01:53:27.211 He shouldn't flash all that money around here. 01:53:27.384 --> 01:53:29.376 He's liable to get hit over the head. 01:53:29.428 --> 01:53:32.421 - Are you gonna warn him? - Me? 01:53:32.889 --> 01:53:34.130 None of my business. 01:53:37.769 --> 01:53:40.386 In a way, I'm going to miss you, your Lordship. 01:53:40.439 --> 01:53:42.897 Pull yourself together, old chap. 01:53:43.025 --> 01:53:45.733 Stiff upper lip and all that. Cheerio. 01:53:48.238 --> 01:53:49.900 One more for the road. 01:53:55.912 --> 01:53:58.746 Jojo, have you got your blackjack on you? 01:53:58.790 --> 01:54:01.453 Sorry. How about some brass knuckles? 01:55:43.895 --> 01:55:46.137 Goodbye, your bloody Lordship! 01:55:50.569 --> 01:55:53.482 I hate to see you go, but c'est la vie, old chap. 01:55:58.910 --> 01:56:01.323 I hope you float all the way back to England 01:56:01.413 --> 01:56:03.996 and I hope the fish eat your bloody liver! 01:56:53.632 --> 01:56:56.249 Police! Police! 01:57:20.116 --> 01:57:22.108 What's the time, Moustache? 01:57:23.370 --> 01:57:26.113 - 8:05. - You sure your watch isn't fast? 01:57:26.289 --> 01:57:29.202 Maybe, or maybe whoever you're waiting for is slow. 01:57:32.170 --> 01:57:33.536 Here you are, baby. 01:57:33.672 --> 01:57:36.665 This time tomorrow you'll be chasing peacocks across the lawn. 01:57:36.758 --> 01:57:38.841 - Where are you going? - To visit my aunt. 01:57:38.927 --> 01:57:39.917 Really? 01:57:39.970 --> 01:57:42.428 She lives in Brussels. That's Belgium, you know. 01:57:42.597 --> 01:57:45.886 Used to be a concert pianist, but runs an orphanage now. 01:57:46.226 --> 01:57:48.718 Come on, Irma. You can do better than that. 01:57:48.812 --> 01:57:51.304 - Is that seat taken? - Yes. 01:57:51.398 --> 01:57:53.264 Cafe au lait and a croissant. 01:57:56.319 --> 01:57:59.608 That aunt of yours, could it be she has a beard and an eye patch 01:57:59.656 --> 01:58:01.648 and her name is Lord X? 01:58:03.451 --> 01:58:06.364 Because if that's who you're waiting for, he won't show. 01:58:06.454 --> 01:58:09.117 Can't a girl sit here without being annoyed by riffraff? 01:58:09.165 --> 01:58:10.406 We get all kinds. 01:58:10.500 --> 01:58:14.164 Just a while ago, we had a real live English lord in here. 01:58:14.296 --> 01:58:16.788 - He was here? - Left about an hour ago. 01:58:16.840 --> 01:58:18.422 Did he say where he was going? 01:58:18.508 --> 01:58:21.171 No. No message. No nothing. 01:58:21.303 --> 01:58:24.011 I saw him walking down the street toward the river. 01:58:24.055 --> 01:58:25.921 But we have a date here. 01:58:26.141 --> 01:58:27.677 Maybe he forgot. 01:58:27.851 --> 01:58:30.013 Maybe he changed his mind. 01:58:30.520 --> 01:58:33.433 He'll come for me. He's a gentleman. 01:58:33.565 --> 01:58:36.524 Gentleman? Don't make me laugh! 01:58:36.860 --> 01:58:38.852 You know nothing about men. 01:58:39.821 --> 01:58:42.529 - I know nothing about men? - And you know why? 01:58:42.574 --> 01:58:45.692 - Because you've been with too many. - Thanks a lot. 01:58:45.869 --> 01:58:48.077 You think you're a pro, an expert on love. 01:58:48.163 --> 01:58:50.450 You can't even tell when somebody really loves you. 01:58:50.540 --> 01:58:52.202 - Like who? - Like me. 01:58:52.250 --> 01:58:56.745 Like hell! You only love that 500 francs twice a week. 01:58:56.838 --> 01:58:59.546 What do I have to do to prove it to you? 01:59:13.897 --> 01:59:17.561 Nestor Patou, I arrest you for the murder of Lord X. 01:59:17.817 --> 01:59:21.731 - The murder of who? - You recognize these clothes? 01:59:24.324 --> 01:59:26.111 That's his umbrella, 01:59:26.409 --> 01:59:30.653 - his eye patch, and his solitaire cards. - Thank you, madame. 01:59:30.747 --> 01:59:33.410 - Where's the lord? - Somewhere at the bottom of the Seine. 01:59:33.500 --> 01:59:34.490 No! 01:59:34.584 --> 01:59:36.371 That's nonsense! There is no Lord X! 01:59:36.419 --> 01:59:39.002 Of course there isn't, because you killed him! 01:59:39.297 --> 01:59:40.754 I saw the whole thing. 01:59:40.799 --> 01:59:44.543 He beat him up, stole his wallet, threw his body in the river. 01:59:46.930 --> 01:59:50.765 Irma, I... Wait a minute! Moustache, tell them! 01:59:50.809 --> 01:59:53.267 Yes, that's the lord's! 01:59:53.645 --> 01:59:57.935 - He was such a sweet man! - The old familiar pattern: 01:59:57.982 --> 02:00:00.349 Young policeman turns dishonest, becomes a mec, 02:00:00.443 --> 02:00:03.436 and finally winds up as a murderer. It's an open-and-shut case. 02:00:03.530 --> 02:00:06.944 You'll just have to reopen it because Moustache can... 02:00:07.242 --> 02:00:10.406 - My client has nothing more to say. - Your client? 02:00:10.453 --> 02:00:12.945 I have a law degree from the University of Grenoble. 02:00:13.039 --> 02:00:15.782 Used to be a leading criminal attorney in France 02:00:15.875 --> 02:00:18.538 before I was disbarred, but that's another story. 02:00:18.628 --> 02:00:20.790 - Put the handcuffs on him! - Just a moment! 02:00:20.880 --> 02:00:23.543 The accused has a right to confer with his lawyer. 02:00:27.303 --> 02:00:30.296 What are you trying to do? Why don't we just tell them the truth? 02:00:30.390 --> 02:00:33.133 - The truth? That's dynamite. - But I'm innocent. 02:00:33.184 --> 02:00:36.473 The jails are full of innocent people because they told the truth. 02:00:36.646 --> 02:00:37.807 What's your defense? 02:00:37.897 --> 02:00:40.139 You couldn't have killed Lord X because you were him. 02:00:40.233 --> 02:00:43.647 Only you weren't Lord X, you were a mec. You weren't really a mec 02:00:43.737 --> 02:00:45.319 you worked the market at night 02:00:45.405 --> 02:00:48.398 to make 500 francs for making love to your own girl 02:00:48.491 --> 02:00:50.528 whom you could have made love to for free 02:00:50.618 --> 02:00:52.530 except you were too tired from making money 02:00:52.620 --> 02:00:55.488 to give to Lord X to give to Irma to give to you. 02:00:55.582 --> 02:00:59.246 That's the truth. And if you tell that mish-mash to a jury 02:00:59.335 --> 02:01:01.918 you're a cinch to get 15 years. 02:01:03.423 --> 02:01:05.961 - What am I gonna do? - Nothing. 02:01:06.718 --> 02:01:08.835 Just put yourself in my hands. 02:01:10.889 --> 02:01:13.597 Gentlemen, my client admits his crime. 02:01:13.975 --> 02:01:15.056 He does? 02:01:15.852 --> 02:01:16.968 I do? 02:01:17.312 --> 02:01:19.395 But let us consider the motive. 02:01:19.564 --> 02:01:22.102 Why would a mec kill his girl's best customer 02:01:22.192 --> 02:01:25.651 for 500 francs, when he can get that twice a week every week? 02:01:25.695 --> 02:01:28.904 It would be like killing the goose that laid the golden egg. 02:01:28.990 --> 02:01:31.448 Or maybe because they were running away together? 02:01:31.576 --> 02:01:33.533 Because he was losing his meal ticket? 02:01:33.620 --> 02:01:37.955 That's equally ridiculous! He's the king around here. 02:01:38.041 --> 02:01:40.328 He could have had any girl working for him. 02:01:40.376 --> 02:01:41.583 That's right. 02:01:43.338 --> 02:01:46.297 So we are left with only one possible motive: 02:01:46.549 --> 02:01:47.960 Jealousy. 02:01:48.051 --> 02:01:49.883 He was so much in love with Irma 02:01:49.969 --> 02:01:53.007 that he couldn't bear to have any other man touch her. 02:01:53.723 --> 02:01:57.467 Yes, Inspector. It's the old familiar pattern: 02:01:57.936 --> 02:01:59.802 Crime of passion. 02:02:01.731 --> 02:02:04.314 Nestor, is that true? 02:02:06.569 --> 02:02:07.605 Yes. 02:02:08.071 --> 02:02:10.028 You did it because you loved me? 02:02:10.240 --> 02:02:11.606 Now you know. 02:02:13.952 --> 02:02:16.569 And I'd kill any other man who came near you! 02:02:17.580 --> 02:02:21.369 Gets you right here, doesn't it? Take him away! 02:02:22.502 --> 02:02:23.913 Nestor, I love you! 02:02:24.212 --> 02:02:27.580 And I'll wait for you, no matter how long it takes! 02:02:40.019 --> 02:02:44.605 You won't have to wait very long. This is France, a civilized country. 02:02:44.691 --> 02:02:46.683 L'amour, toujours l'amour. 02:02:47.360 --> 02:02:49.647 When the jury hears my summation: 02:02:49.779 --> 02:02:52.613 Two people in the gutter reaching for the stars... 02:02:52.824 --> 02:02:54.486 They'll cry, they'll cheer. 02:02:54.617 --> 02:02:58.110 They'll carry him out of the courtroom on their shoulders! 02:03:14.053 --> 02:03:15.419 Patou! 02:03:20.184 --> 02:03:21.345 Patou! 02:03:27.400 --> 02:03:29.687 There's a visitor here to see you. 02:03:49.672 --> 02:03:51.004 It's you. 02:03:54.969 --> 02:03:58.963 - You're lucky I can't get my hands on you! - That's no way to talk to your lawyer. 02:03:59.015 --> 02:04:01.883 Right! You were to get me off scot-free. Crime of passion. 02:04:01.976 --> 02:04:05.515 - Carry me out of court on their shoulders. - You can't win 'em all. 02:04:05.563 --> 02:04:08.476 Fifteen years at hard labor. For what? 02:04:08.650 --> 02:04:10.892 It's too bad you didn't get sentenced to death. 02:04:10.985 --> 02:04:13.102 Then I could have had it commuted to life. 02:04:13.196 --> 02:04:15.984 With good behavior, I could've gotten you parole by Christmas. 02:04:16.199 --> 02:04:19.613 But a 15-year sentence, that's neither here nor there. 02:04:21.037 --> 02:04:23.370 Never mind that. Tell me about Irma. How is she? 02:04:23.456 --> 02:04:25.163 She's fine. 02:04:25.458 --> 02:04:28.747 - Here, I brought you a little souvenir. - Thanks. 02:04:30.213 --> 02:04:33.706 Why doesn't she come to see me anymore? Why haven't I heard from her? 02:04:33.841 --> 02:04:36.709 - She doesn't want you to find out. - Find out what? 02:04:36.803 --> 02:04:40.296 - She's not on the street again? - No. That's all over. 02:04:40.390 --> 02:04:42.598 She's working in the market as a cashier. 02:04:42.892 --> 02:04:45.100 Then, what is it? I want to know! 02:04:45.186 --> 02:04:47.303 - She's expecting. - Who? 02:04:47.397 --> 02:04:48.387 Who do you think? 02:04:48.439 --> 02:04:50.897 She's out to here. She's going to have a baby. 02:04:50.984 --> 02:04:52.941 A baby? Are you sure? 02:04:53.027 --> 02:04:55.895 I would be greatly disappointed if it were anything else. 02:04:55.989 --> 02:04:58.527 - When? - Any day now. 02:04:58.741 --> 02:05:02.735 Listen, I've got to get out of here! I want to be with her. She needs me! 02:05:02.996 --> 02:05:05.079 Here. I brought you another souvenir. 02:05:05.248 --> 02:05:07.911 - More stockings? - And another. 02:05:09.377 --> 02:05:10.538 And another. 02:05:11.004 --> 02:05:14.168 - Have you gone mad? - And one more. 02:05:14.257 --> 02:05:17.250 What am I gonna do with all of these stockings? 02:05:18.761 --> 02:05:20.923 If you don't want them, throw them out the window. 02:05:20.972 --> 02:05:25.057 But first, I would suggest that you tie them all together. 02:05:25.393 --> 02:05:26.474 What? 02:06:00.678 --> 02:06:02.260 You can't park here. 02:06:02.972 --> 02:06:05.339 There's something wrong with my motor. 02:08:13.144 --> 02:08:14.305 Nestor! 02:08:16.981 --> 02:08:19.439 What are you doing here? How did you get away? 02:08:19.525 --> 02:08:21.482 - Give me your hand. - They let you out? 02:08:21.569 --> 02:08:23.686 - Try this on. - You escaped? 02:08:23.779 --> 02:08:26.738 - Hold still. - Darling, why did you do that? 02:08:26.782 --> 02:08:30.696 - Now they'll give you another five years. - I was afraid of that. It's too big. 02:08:30.786 --> 02:08:33.449 - What's this? - We're going to be married. 02:08:33.539 --> 02:08:34.620 Married? 02:08:34.665 --> 02:08:37.703 You want our child to be legitimate, don't you? 02:08:37.793 --> 02:08:40.627 - Yes. Of course. - How is the baby? 02:08:41.297 --> 02:08:42.663 Full of mischief. 02:08:42.798 --> 02:08:45.165 Yesterday he kicked Coquette right off my lap. 02:08:45.259 --> 02:08:46.420 Takes after me. 02:08:46.469 --> 02:08:49.837 You know, when I was 6 months old, I could change my own diapers. 02:08:52.892 --> 02:08:54.679 - Nestor? - Yeah? What is it? 02:08:54.769 --> 02:08:55.976 I can't marry you. 02:08:56.062 --> 02:08:58.429 What do you mean, you can't marry me? 02:08:58.481 --> 02:09:00.097 Because I love you. 02:09:01.400 --> 02:09:04.643 - You love me, so you can't marry me? - That's right. 02:09:04.946 --> 02:09:08.189 Because it isn't our baby. You're not the father. 02:09:08.991 --> 02:09:10.277 I'm not... 02:09:11.202 --> 02:09:13.410 Who's the father? I'll kill him! 02:09:13.537 --> 02:09:16.075 You already did. It was Lord X. 02:09:16.999 --> 02:09:18.160 Lord X? 02:09:20.253 --> 02:09:24.918 - What makes you think that... - A woman always knows these things. 02:09:26.175 --> 02:09:28.508 I don't care. I'll marry you anyway! 02:09:28.552 --> 02:09:32.216 And I'll raise it just as if it were my own child. 02:09:53.995 --> 02:09:56.282 They've got the place surrounded! 02:09:57.748 --> 02:10:01.082 Maybe you could go through the kitchen window and over the roof. 02:10:02.378 --> 02:10:04.335 No. I prefer the closet! 02:10:05.548 --> 02:10:07.915 The closet? That's the first place they'll look! 02:10:14.307 --> 02:10:16.048 Open up! Police! 02:10:20.146 --> 02:10:22.263 Come on! We know he's in there! 02:10:33.826 --> 02:10:35.863 All right! Where's Nestor? 02:10:36.329 --> 02:10:39.993 Don't you know? He's in jail. You can visit him every other Sunday. 02:10:40.082 --> 02:10:42.449 Cute. Let's search the place! 02:11:11.614 --> 02:11:14.698 - He's not in there. - Not in there. 02:12:02.206 --> 02:12:05.040 - Not under here. - He's not under here. 02:12:07.837 --> 02:12:12.172 Come here, everybody. This is the man we're looking for. 02:12:42.580 --> 02:12:43.821 No sign of him. 02:12:44.748 --> 02:12:46.284 No sign of him. 02:12:48.252 --> 02:12:50.915 Tell him he'd better give himself up, or he spends 02:12:51.005 --> 02:12:52.962 the rest of his life behind bars! 02:12:53.382 --> 02:12:54.964 Let's go, men. 02:12:59.513 --> 02:13:01.550 - What's the matter? - Nothing. 02:13:02.349 --> 02:13:03.885 Let's go, men! 02:13:13.319 --> 02:13:15.231 Did you hear what he said? 02:13:16.238 --> 02:13:17.900 What are you going to do? 02:13:18.115 --> 02:13:20.983 The first thing I have to do is exchange the ring. 02:13:21.243 --> 02:13:24.953 But we can't get married now. You must run! You must hide! 02:13:25.039 --> 02:13:26.155 Nonsense! 02:13:26.248 --> 02:13:29.741 We'll have a big church wedding with ushers and bridesmaids and flowers. 02:13:29.835 --> 02:13:34.045 - Moustache is making the arrangements. - But they'll catch you and lock you away. 02:13:34.173 --> 02:13:37.132 - I'm so afraid I'll never see you again. - Don't be afraid. 02:13:37.218 --> 02:13:40.757 - Maybe a miracle will happen. - I don't believe in miracles. 02:13:40.846 --> 02:13:42.178 Don't you? 02:13:43.098 --> 02:13:45.055 When I met you, you were a streetwalker. 02:13:45.100 --> 02:13:48.059 Now you're going to be a wife and a mother. 02:13:48.103 --> 02:13:49.935 Isn't that a miracle? 02:13:57.321 --> 02:14:00.405 They're wasting their time looking for him in Irma's apartment. 02:14:00.449 --> 02:14:01.906 Don't worry. They'll catch him. 02:14:01.951 --> 02:14:03.943 No, they won't. Too much brains. 02:14:04.036 --> 02:14:06.119 You mean Nestor's smarter than the police force? 02:14:06.205 --> 02:14:09.448 No, but I am. They're up against a mastermind. 02:14:11.544 --> 02:14:14.161 I bet by now you have him on a boat to South America. 02:14:14.255 --> 02:14:16.497 - Guess again. - To Hong Kong? 02:14:17.925 --> 02:14:19.666 He's right here in town. 02:14:20.386 --> 02:14:23.595 - You don't say! - It's ordinary common sense. 02:14:23.889 --> 02:14:27.007 You've heard about a criminal returning to the scene of the crime? 02:14:27.101 --> 02:14:28.683 - Yes. - That's so obvious. 02:14:28.769 --> 02:14:30.635 The police'd never think to look there! 02:14:30.688 --> 02:14:34.602 - He's hiding under the same bridge... - Yeah. The Pont Royal. 02:14:36.986 --> 02:14:39.854 If you open up your mouth about this to anyone... 02:14:39.947 --> 02:14:41.939 Me? Squeal on a colleague? 02:14:42.074 --> 02:14:45.784 There's such a thing as the code of the underworld, you know. 02:15:05.598 --> 02:15:08.807 Desk Sergeant, connect me with Inspector Lefevre. 02:15:10.227 --> 02:15:13.561 Just tell him I want to squeal on a colleague. 02:16:30.099 --> 02:16:33.012 - You! - I beg your pardon? 02:16:33.310 --> 02:16:36.519 - You're supposed to be dead, murdered! - Are you quite sure? 02:16:36.605 --> 02:16:38.597 I saw it with my own eyes. 02:16:38.691 --> 02:16:42.059 Sorry to disappoint you, old boy, but other than a slight headache 02:16:42.111 --> 02:16:44.603 I'm feeling absolutely chapper. I mean chipper! 02:16:44.780 --> 02:16:47.193 We've been dragging the river for nine months! 02:16:47.282 --> 02:16:48.614 Where have you been? 02:16:48.701 --> 02:16:51.068 Fair question. Now, let me see. 02:16:51.704 --> 02:16:53.320 I haven't the foggiest. 02:16:53.622 --> 02:16:58.162 All I can remember is that the climate was rather wet and fishy. 02:16:58.252 --> 02:16:59.618 It was quite good. 02:16:59.712 --> 02:17:02.455 Now, I trust that clears things up satisfactorily. 02:17:02.506 --> 02:17:05.249 So, cheerio, pip pip, and carry on. 02:17:42.838 --> 02:17:44.295 Are you all right? 02:17:44.339 --> 02:17:46.672 The pains are coming every two minutes now. 02:17:46.800 --> 02:17:49.292 Just try to hold on a little longer. 02:17:58.854 --> 02:18:00.561 Where's the groom? 02:18:09.406 --> 02:18:13.150 Don't worry, if worse comes to worst, I'll marry you myself. 02:18:35.057 --> 02:18:37.549 - You look lovely. - Later, later. 02:18:39.394 --> 02:18:43.229 Nestor, wilt thou take Irma, here present, for thy lawful wife 02:18:43.273 --> 02:18:46.061 according to the rite of Our Holy Mother the Church? 02:18:46.109 --> 02:18:47.316 I will. 02:18:47.486 --> 02:18:51.230 Irma, wilt thou take Nestor, here present, for thy lawful husband 02:18:51.323 --> 02:18:53.736 according to the rite of Our Holy Mother the Church? 02:18:53.784 --> 02:18:54.865 I will. 02:19:47.296 --> 02:19:50.539 - With this ring, I thee wed. - "With this ring, I thee wed." 02:19:50.632 --> 02:19:54.125 - And I pledge thee my fidelity. - "And I pledge thee my fidelity." 02:20:04.521 --> 02:20:06.262 Just a minute, Patou. 02:20:08.025 --> 02:20:10.392 Congratulations. It was a touching ceremony. 02:20:10.485 --> 02:20:12.192 Thanks. Nice of you to show up. 02:20:12.279 --> 02:20:14.987 We're planning a reception for you at the police station. 02:20:15.032 --> 02:20:16.864 Can't it wait? My wife is about... 02:20:16.950 --> 02:20:20.034 A hoax has been perpetrated. I intend to get to the bottom of it! 02:20:20.120 --> 02:20:23.204 - You can't arrest me in a church. - Arrest you? 02:20:23.290 --> 02:20:26.499 I want you to rejoin the police force and help us solve this case. 02:20:26.543 --> 02:20:28.751 Rejoin the force? I'd like that. 02:20:28.837 --> 02:20:31.875 Not unless I can have my old job at the children's playground? 02:20:31.965 --> 02:20:34.708 The children's playground? Work for peanuts and jellybeans? 02:20:34.801 --> 02:20:37.965 I'm crazy about children! I'm about to have one myself. 02:20:40.641 --> 02:20:43.099 I just had it. Excuse me. 02:20:54.529 --> 02:20:58.022 It's a girl. Smoothest delivery I ever had. 02:20:58.367 --> 02:20:59.733 She's beautiful. 02:21:00.410 --> 02:21:01.400 You delivered the baby? 02:21:01.495 --> 02:21:05.034 Why not? I used to be Chief Obstetrician in French Equatorial Africa 02:21:05.082 --> 02:21:06.869 under Dr. Schweitzer. 02:21:12.047 --> 02:21:13.379 Nestor. 02:21:17.719 --> 02:21:21.713 - They're not taking you away? - Never. You can call me Officer Patou. 02:21:21.765 --> 02:21:23.882 - What happened? - Not now. 02:21:25.560 --> 02:21:27.552 Let me hold her. 02:21:30.691 --> 02:21:33.604 It's going to be such fun bringing her up. 02:21:34.027 --> 02:21:37.065 I'll put her in organdy dresses with pinafores. 02:21:37.155 --> 02:21:38.145 Yeah. 02:21:38.240 --> 02:21:40.903 And get her some green stockings and a puppy. 02:21:40.951 --> 02:21:42.908 Yeah... No. 02:21:43.161 --> 02:21:45.744 No green stockings, no puppy. 02:21:46.123 --> 02:21:47.910 - No? - No. 02:22:17.404 --> 02:22:18.736 Cheery-bye. 02:22:30.125 --> 02:22:31.616 But that's another story. 02:22:34.125 --> 02:22:55.616 جديدترين اخبار فيلم و سريال در کانال تلگرام و اینستاگرام سايت .:: @bollbolljan_com ::.