WEBVTT 00:00:01.987 --> 00:00:21.987 ..:: Presented By ZarFilm Website ::.. ‏.:: www.bolboljan.net ::. 00:01:33.911 --> 00:01:36.246 Quite deadly in the right hands. 00:01:58.853 --> 00:02:01.563 Ah! Agent One. 00:02:03.316 --> 00:02:06.109 I have been so looking forward to this moment. 00:02:07.361 --> 00:02:11.031 Well, in that case, I'll try not to disappoint. 00:02:12.450 --> 00:02:16.411 You overestimate your power over women, Mr English. 00:02:18.039 --> 00:02:20.624 I'd say that would be virtually impossible. 00:02:34.096 --> 00:02:37.682 Sir? Sir? 00:02:39.268 --> 00:02:40.852 - Sir! 00:02:40.937 --> 00:02:42.229 - Have you got them? - Hmm? 00:02:42.313 --> 00:02:44.564 The mission documents. Agent One's flying to Biarritz tonight. 00:02:44.649 --> 00:02:47.234 Yes, yes, the mission documents. They're here somewhere. Don't worry. 00:02:47.610 --> 00:02:49.402 Ah! Here we are. 00:02:53.950 --> 00:02:55.242 Agent One. 00:02:56.327 --> 00:02:57.661 Gentlemen. 00:03:03.501 --> 00:03:04.501 I'm here for my documents. 00:03:06.379 --> 00:03:08.880 Bough, Agent One's documents, please. 00:03:12.593 --> 00:03:14.469 - Thank you. 00:03:14.553 --> 00:03:16.096 Your mission documents, Agent One. 00:03:16.180 --> 00:03:19.849 Including the codes for the submarine hatch, which I've checked myself. 00:03:22.687 --> 00:03:25.188 - Thank you. - So, is it just France tonight, 00:03:25.273 --> 00:03:28.817 or will you be slipping over the Pyrenees as well? 00:03:29.819 --> 00:03:33.071 If I told you that, I'm afraid I'd have to kill you. 00:03:33.489 --> 00:03:35.740 Oh! 00:03:37.660 --> 00:03:41.871 Oh, yes, yes. Well, I expect you would. 00:03:42.873 --> 00:03:44.791 Cheerio, Agent One. 00:03:44.875 --> 00:03:46.376 Bonne chance! 00:03:46.877 --> 00:03:48.128 Arrivederci. 00:03:49.630 --> 00:03:54.050 Such class. Such distinction. 00:04:03.894 --> 00:04:08.606 The greatest secret agent England's ever had, snuffed out in an instant. 00:04:08.691 --> 00:04:10.233 Terrible. 00:04:11.694 --> 00:04:15.155 Do you know what makes us envied the world over, Bough? 00:04:15.239 --> 00:04:18.575 That there's always another agent waiting to step into the breach. 00:04:18.659 --> 00:04:19.701 Absolutely, sir. 00:04:19.785 --> 00:04:22.746 And every last one of them is gathered round that grave. 00:04:23.372 --> 00:04:27.375 It is our honour and privilege to guard them while they grieve. 00:04:28.377 --> 00:04:30.503 Their lives are in our hands, Bough. 00:04:42.141 --> 00:04:43.725 Everything in order, English? 00:04:44.477 --> 00:04:47.103 I think you'll find it's rather more than just in order, sir. 00:04:47.605 --> 00:04:51.274 You're now entering the most secure location in the whole of England. 00:04:59.617 --> 00:05:01.951 Pegasus, we face a national crisis. 00:05:02.161 --> 00:05:05.413 Agent One was clearly onto something, and we have to find out what. 00:05:06.040 --> 00:05:08.124 I need another agent on this immediately. Who else is there? 00:05:08.709 --> 00:05:12.504 No one, Prime Minister. They all died in the explosion. 00:05:13.297 --> 00:05:14.631 All of them? 00:05:14.715 --> 00:05:17.675 Well, luckily there is one who survived. 00:05:18.260 --> 00:05:19.302 Who? 00:05:20.012 --> 00:05:23.807 One eye on the shadows Protecting his fellows 00:05:24.183 --> 00:05:25.266 From sunup to the moon on his back 00:05:27.353 --> 00:05:29.687 Sendin' villains to Hades A hit with the ladies 00:05:29.772 --> 00:05:31.147 Johnny. Hello. 00:05:31.649 --> 00:05:34.526 A stallion in the sack 00:05:35.736 --> 00:05:37.862 You can't get your life back when right follows left, jack 00:05:39.740 --> 00:05:42.242 The more you see, the less you know 00:05:43.327 --> 00:05:47.288 When others would leak it His service is secret 00:05:47.373 --> 00:05:50.375 Plays God when it's your time to go 00:05:50.459 --> 00:05:54.337 Hey, fellas Don't be jealous 00:05:54.839 --> 00:05:57.757 When they made him, they broke the mould 00:05:57.842 --> 00:06:01.970 So charismatic With an automatic 00:06:02.054 --> 00:06:05.765 Never prematurely shooting his load 00:06:07.518 --> 00:06:11.187 Queen and country safe and sound With villains six feet underground 00:06:11.272 --> 00:06:14.274 And no one knows 'cause no one's found any trace 00:06:14.358 --> 00:06:19.028 Of a man for all seasons Loves 'em and leaves 'em alone 00:06:19.864 --> 00:06:21.990 So alone 00:06:22.825 --> 00:06:26.786 And you and I wouldn't have a clue Who's doin' what, why, when and who 00:06:26.871 --> 00:06:28.621 Up a creek with no canoe 00:06:28.706 --> 00:06:32.041 Watch out for the man for all seasons 00:06:32.126 --> 00:06:35.003 Loves 'em and leaves 'em alone 00:06:35.087 --> 00:06:40.884 So alone But safe at home 00:06:43.596 --> 00:06:45.096 Yeah, yeah 00:06:46.223 --> 00:06:49.601 But safe at home But safe at home 00:06:53.898 --> 00:06:57.817 And you and I wouldn't have a clue Who's doin' what, why, when and who 00:06:57.902 --> 00:06:59.652 Up a creek with no canoe 00:06:59.737 --> 00:07:03.031 Watch out for the man for all seasons 00:07:03.115 --> 00:07:06.075 Loves 'em and leaves 'em alone 00:07:06.160 --> 00:07:11.915 So alone But safe at home 00:07:14.210 --> 00:07:15.793 Right. 00:07:16.587 --> 00:07:18.838 Johnny English. I'm here to see Pegasus. 00:07:20.049 --> 00:07:22.967 Still, no sense rushing things. 00:07:25.429 --> 00:07:28.139 There are some items you need to sign before your briefing. 00:07:28.599 --> 00:07:30.934 This is your new retinal ID card, 00:07:31.936 --> 00:07:34.854 - and this is your level nine security clearance. - Mmm-hmm. 00:07:34.939 --> 00:07:36.314 Sign and date, please. 00:07:38.692 --> 00:07:39.734 Ah! 00:07:41.612 --> 00:07:44.280 Oh, reminds me of the old service-issue ballpoint. 00:07:44.907 --> 00:07:48.117 I remember every agent would carry a pen that looked just like this. 00:07:48.285 --> 00:07:51.704 Completely innocent to the untrained eye, but click it twice... 00:07:55.251 --> 00:07:57.418 Ah, English, there you are. 00:07:59.129 --> 00:08:00.463 Have you seen my secretary? 00:08:00.965 --> 00:08:02.048 Um... 00:08:03.425 --> 00:08:04.467 She went out. 00:08:05.636 --> 00:08:06.761 Um... 00:08:08.806 --> 00:08:09.806 Shall we? 00:08:12.601 --> 00:08:13.768 Now, Agent One believed 00:08:13.852 --> 00:08:16.854 that there was a plot to steal the Crown Jewels. 00:08:16.939 --> 00:08:19.607 Now, they've recently been through a multimillion-pound restoration, 00:08:19.692 --> 00:08:21.859 largely paid for by a corporate sponsor, of course. 00:08:21.944 --> 00:08:24.320 And they're due to be unveiled tonight at the Tower of London. 00:08:24.947 --> 00:08:28.199 Unfortunately, the Queen is insisting that the ceremony goes ahead, 00:08:28.284 --> 00:08:29.701 so what we want you to... 00:08:33.789 --> 00:08:34.789 Ha! 00:08:34.873 --> 00:08:36.916 Who... Who... 00:08:37.001 --> 00:08:39.419 Who is the sponsor, sir? 00:08:39.878 --> 00:08:41.671 Pascal Sauvage. 00:08:42.131 --> 00:08:45.091 What, that flouncy Frenchman who owns a couple of prisons? 00:08:45.676 --> 00:08:48.469 Sauvage's £7-billion empire, English, 00:08:48.554 --> 00:08:51.347 operates over 400 prisons in 60 countries. 00:08:51.682 --> 00:08:53.808 - He's built 25 of them here. - Right, sir. 00:08:53.892 --> 00:08:56.603 The man's related to the royal family, for goodness' sake. 00:08:56.854 --> 00:08:58.521 As far as the prime minister's concerned, 00:08:58.606 --> 00:09:00.648 he's one of the greatest friends England's got. 00:09:02.401 --> 00:09:06.070 Now, English, I want you at the Tower tonight, 00:09:06.155 --> 00:09:08.031 monitoring this unveiling. 00:09:08.157 --> 00:09:10.617 Any chink in security, any weakness, 00:09:10.701 --> 00:09:13.620 however slight, must be plugged immediately. 00:09:14.580 --> 00:09:16.414 Do we understand each other? 00:09:16.999 --> 00:09:18.791 - Perfectly, sir. - Good. 00:09:18.876 --> 00:09:21.919 - Oh, yes. - And, English, 00:09:22.004 --> 00:09:25.381 we can't afford any mistakes. Not tonight. 00:09:25.924 --> 00:09:29.677 The word "mistake," sir, is not one that appears in my dictionary. 00:09:36.226 --> 00:09:37.810 Fantastic car, sir! 00:09:47.821 --> 00:09:52.533 Mr English, Colonel Sir Anthony Chevenix, head of royal security. 00:09:52.618 --> 00:09:54.369 Ah, Colonel, good evening. 00:09:54.453 --> 00:09:56.663 Snipers posted on the roof as per my request? 00:09:56.747 --> 00:09:58.331 - Thirteen of them. - Windows? 00:09:58.415 --> 00:10:01.084 Refitted with bullet- and shatter-proof glass, as ordered. 00:10:04.672 --> 00:10:07.423 I shall now mingle inconspicuously with the guests. 00:10:07.966 --> 00:10:10.718 - Let me know when Her Majesty arrives. - Very good. 00:10:11.637 --> 00:10:13.346 Shall I mingle with you, sir? 00:10:13.931 --> 00:10:16.974 Oh, yes, Bough. Once you've checked the roof. 00:10:39.957 --> 00:10:42.041 Help! Help! 00:10:42.126 --> 00:10:44.043 Well, hello. 00:10:46.130 --> 00:10:47.296 Hello, yourself. 00:10:47.798 --> 00:10:50.216 Johnny English. 00:10:50.300 --> 00:10:52.844 Lorna Campbell. 00:10:52.928 --> 00:10:55.179 A Bloody Mary, please, not too spicy. 00:10:56.640 --> 00:10:59.934 So, are you here in some professional capacity? 00:11:00.310 --> 00:11:02.145 I worked on the restoration of the Jewels. 00:11:02.730 --> 00:11:04.981 - Intriguing. - And yourself? 00:11:05.649 --> 00:11:09.444 If I told you that, I'm afraid I'd have to kill you. 00:11:09.987 --> 00:11:11.404 I'd like to see you try. 00:11:17.411 --> 00:11:20.747 Monsieur Sauvage, on behalf of Her Majesty, 00:11:20.831 --> 00:11:22.832 may I welcome you to the Tower. 00:11:22.916 --> 00:11:24.500 Merci, monsieur. 00:11:25.335 --> 00:11:27.754 So, are you here alone, Mr English? 00:11:28.380 --> 00:11:30.673 That's how I choose to live my life, Miss Campbell. 00:11:31.133 --> 00:11:35.845 Women want safety, security. I can offer them nothing but danger. 00:11:36.597 --> 00:11:38.848 Some women find danger very attractive. 00:11:39.975 --> 00:11:42.018 Women like you, Miss Campbell? 00:11:44.146 --> 00:11:49.025 Women like me expect men like you to find that out for yourself. 00:11:50.319 --> 00:11:51.402 Hmm! 00:11:53.197 --> 00:11:55.239 Madame. 00:11:55.324 --> 00:11:56.657 Oh, it's for me, actually. 00:11:56.742 --> 00:11:57.742 And could you rustle up 00:11:57.826 --> 00:12:00.036 some of those cheesy niblets that are going around? 00:12:00.662 --> 00:12:02.371 Now, where were we? 00:12:02.456 --> 00:12:05.708 You obviously haven't met our host, Monsieur Sauvage. 00:12:06.043 --> 00:12:08.127 No, thank God. 00:12:08.212 --> 00:12:12.715 You know, I think I'd rather have my bottom impaled on a giant cactus 00:12:12.800 --> 00:12:15.551 than exchange pleasantries with that jumped-up Frenchman. 00:12:16.386 --> 00:12:17.470 As far as I'm concerned, 00:12:17.554 --> 00:12:20.681 the only thing the French should be allowed to host is an invasion. 00:12:23.977 --> 00:12:25.436 Sorry, can I help? 00:12:25.521 --> 00:12:28.981 Pascal Sauvage, jumped-up Frenchman. 00:12:29.066 --> 00:12:32.068 Lorna Campbell. I've been so looking forward to meeting you. 00:12:32.152 --> 00:12:33.152 Enchanté. 00:12:34.863 --> 00:12:38.366 But of course! You're Johnny English. I've heard all about you. 00:12:38.450 --> 00:12:42.161 And between you and me, I'm not so keen on the French myself. 00:12:42.246 --> 00:12:44.080 But, please, don't tell them that. 00:12:44.623 --> 00:12:47.333 Let me go and search for your nibbly cheese bits. 00:12:47.417 --> 00:12:48.709 No, no, I don't... 00:12:48.794 --> 00:12:52.463 Please, I insist. The French are, after all, fantastic waiters. 00:12:52.756 --> 00:12:54.215 - The best in the world. - Well, but... But... 00:12:54.299 --> 00:12:57.301 - Wait here, and I will wait on you. - No, no, really. There's no... 00:12:57.386 --> 00:13:00.304 No, no. Please, please, please, please! 00:13:03.934 --> 00:13:05.726 Les Français. 00:13:06.603 --> 00:13:11.482 Ils sont very... N'est-ce pas? 00:13:26.790 --> 00:13:30.543 Ladies and gentlemen, mesdames et messieurs, 00:13:30.627 --> 00:13:35.298 bienvenue, welcome tonight to this wonderful occasion. 00:13:35.757 --> 00:13:39.218 As we stand here in the Tower of London, 00:13:39.303 --> 00:13:41.512 the most famous prison in the world, 00:13:41.597 --> 00:13:46.934 where these wonderful Jewels will rest safely under lock and key, 00:13:48.395 --> 00:13:53.065 I want to thank you for giving me this wonderful experience 00:13:53.150 --> 00:13:58.112 to contribute to the restoration of these Jewels. 00:13:58.405 --> 00:14:02.825 - It was, as we say in France, le top, le best of. 00:14:02.993 --> 00:14:04.452 - And what a beautiful... 00:14:26.808 --> 00:14:31.479 It's Colonel Chevenix! He's got a nasty wound, sir. Who hit him? 00:14:32.356 --> 00:14:34.815 The assailant. He ran in here. 00:14:36.026 --> 00:14:37.526 Bough, you guard the door. 00:14:38.028 --> 00:14:39.111 A-ha! 00:14:44.534 --> 00:14:47.453 Oh, for God's sake, Bough, don't come in. The man's a maniac! 00:14:49.998 --> 00:14:51.457 You don't frighten me! 00:14:51.541 --> 00:14:52.583 - Missed! 00:15:24.741 --> 00:15:26.575 I have managed to subdue the assailant. 00:15:27.119 --> 00:15:30.287 The panic's over. Everything's under control. 00:15:34.918 --> 00:15:37.169 Thank you. And now, ladies and gentlemen, 00:15:37.254 --> 00:15:40.464 we should compose ourselves for the arrival of Her Majesty 00:15:40.716 --> 00:15:47.304 and return to the site of our great nation's magnificently restored Crown Jewels. 00:15:52.185 --> 00:15:54.353 I know. I feel it, too. 00:15:55.022 --> 00:15:57.356 The very symbols of our island nation, 00:15:57.441 --> 00:16:01.027 so close we could almost reach out and... 00:16:03.113 --> 00:16:05.656 MAN: Pray silence for Her Majesty the Queen. 00:16:07.451 --> 00:16:09.452 Oh, where are the Jewels? 00:16:10.704 --> 00:16:12.872 It's an unmitigated disaster, English. 00:16:12.956 --> 00:16:14.540 I couldn't agree more, sir. 00:16:15.208 --> 00:16:18.627 Well, we need to get these Jewels back, English, and fast. 00:16:22.632 --> 00:16:26.177 Tell me about this assailant, because when they searched the room later, 00:16:26.261 --> 00:16:27.303 there was no sign of him. 00:16:27.512 --> 00:16:29.847 Well, the man was clearly a professional. 00:16:30.474 --> 00:16:33.642 He must have escaped while the Queen was being sedated. 00:16:33.727 --> 00:16:36.270 But he's the only lead we've got, English. We have to find him. 00:16:36.354 --> 00:16:40.566 Come in. This is... This is Roger from Data Support. 00:16:41.359 --> 00:16:44.528 Please sit down. He'll produce a likeness based on your description. 00:16:45.489 --> 00:16:47.740 So tell us, what did this man look like? 00:16:48.325 --> 00:16:49.450 Um... 00:16:49.785 --> 00:16:51.368 Well... 00:16:51.453 --> 00:16:53.913 He was big. 00:16:54.247 --> 00:16:55.247 Hair colour? 00:16:56.333 --> 00:16:57.416 Um... 00:16:59.544 --> 00:17:00.544 Orange. 00:17:00.629 --> 00:17:03.631 - Orange? - Mmm. And curly. 00:17:04.174 --> 00:17:06.884 Well, frizzy, actually. Frizzy sort of thing. 00:17:06.968 --> 00:17:10.513 - Frizzy. - An eye patch. 00:17:11.181 --> 00:17:13.933 Broken nose. Very few teeth. 00:17:14.351 --> 00:17:15.976 Two, I would say, at the most. 00:17:16.520 --> 00:17:19.939 And a scar on his cheek, 00:17:20.357 --> 00:17:24.318 in the shape of a banana. 00:17:24.444 --> 00:17:27.738 Which cheek? - Both cheeks. 00:17:28.532 --> 00:17:30.366 They sort of met in the middle. 00:17:39.376 --> 00:17:40.668 Are you sure about this, English? 00:17:42.712 --> 00:17:46.298 Yes, that's him. An uncanny resemblance. 00:17:46.800 --> 00:17:48.717 Why, it's just as if he's in the room with us. 00:17:56.309 --> 00:18:00.646 Wow! Look at this, sir. Got all the bells and whistles, doesn't it? 00:18:00.772 --> 00:18:03.983 Never mind about the gadgets, Bough. Just focus on the case. 00:18:11.783 --> 00:18:13.075 Oh, uh... 00:18:19.916 --> 00:18:23.002 Good morning, gentlemen. Thank you very much for waiting. 00:18:23.086 --> 00:18:27.089 Now, the question that faces us this morning is a simple one. 00:18:27.424 --> 00:18:32.261 Namely, how did the thieves gain access to this highly secure environment 00:18:32.637 --> 00:18:35.097 and then escape with the Jewels afterwards? 00:18:35.599 --> 00:18:36.807 A simple question, 00:18:36.892 --> 00:18:40.477 but one which I believe has a complex answer. 00:18:40.854 --> 00:18:43.439 - Actually, sir... - Please, Bough. My mind is at work. 00:18:44.107 --> 00:18:47.193 Now, what you must grasp, gentlemen, is that the master criminal 00:18:47.277 --> 00:18:50.946 sees not a room, but a series of opportunities. 00:18:51.698 --> 00:18:53.240 Should I go in through the window? 00:18:54.659 --> 00:18:56.035 Possibly. 00:18:56.119 --> 00:18:59.872 Should I drop down from the ceiling? Perhaps. 00:19:00.290 --> 00:19:01.707 - Actually, sir... - There's one thing 00:19:01.791 --> 00:19:04.460 I think we can be fairly confident about, 00:19:04.544 --> 00:19:07.213 and that is that they didn't come up through the floor... 00:19:07.672 --> 00:19:09.381 - I've got you, sir. 00:19:10.008 --> 00:19:12.426 Right. That's all right. Just come my way, Bough. 00:19:12.594 --> 00:19:16.472 - That'd bring me right over the hole, sir. - Bough, there's no need to panic. 00:19:20.143 --> 00:19:21.977 Can you see the bottom yet, Bough? 00:19:22.103 --> 00:19:25.231 Not yet, sir. The shaft appears to be narrowing. 00:19:25.732 --> 00:19:27.816 I'm just a little bit worried I might get stuck. 00:19:27.901 --> 00:19:31.695 Trust me, Bough. You won't get stuck if you just keep moving. 00:19:32.155 --> 00:19:33.572 Yes, sir. 00:19:37.285 --> 00:19:38.535 Right. Okay, sir. 00:19:38.703 --> 00:19:40.496 Are you at the bottom now, Bough? 00:19:40.914 --> 00:19:42.790 No, I am in fact stuck now, sir. 00:19:43.583 --> 00:19:47.336 Oh, for God's sake, Bough. Stay there! I'm coming down. 00:19:48.505 --> 00:19:51.423 Uh, I'm not especially sure that's a good idea, sir. 00:19:51.508 --> 00:19:52.758 Don't worry. 00:19:54.177 --> 00:19:55.594 Careful, sir! 00:20:00.100 --> 00:20:01.475 Gently does it. 00:20:02.227 --> 00:20:04.687 - Sir? 00:20:09.317 --> 00:20:10.442 You all right, sir? 00:20:10.527 --> 00:20:12.278 Yes. I landed on something quite soft. 00:20:12.404 --> 00:20:14.655 - That was me, sir. - Oh, good. 00:20:16.741 --> 00:20:17.992 What now? 00:20:19.160 --> 00:20:20.995 There's no way back up there, that's for sure. 00:20:21.288 --> 00:20:23.080 But this must lead somewhere. 00:20:23.456 --> 00:20:26.292 I'm ever so slightly uncomfortable in the dark, sir. 00:20:26.376 --> 00:20:27.960 There's nothing to worry about, Bough. 00:20:28.044 --> 00:20:31.547 It may be pitch black, but we can still see. 00:20:31.631 --> 00:20:32.756 Can we, sir? How? 00:20:32.882 --> 00:20:35.843 The Bedouin monks of the al-Maghrib mountains 00:20:35.927 --> 00:20:38.220 developed a system of sonic chanting. 00:20:38.305 --> 00:20:40.556 I see, sir. - The sound of their chanting 00:20:40.640 --> 00:20:42.850 would bounce back off any obstacles, 00:20:42.934 --> 00:20:44.310 and using their highly tuned ears, 00:20:44.394 --> 00:20:47.396 they could paint a mental picture of the path ahead. 00:20:47.522 --> 00:20:51.066 Brilliant, sir. - However, you must always sing in E-flat. 00:20:54.654 --> 00:20:58.574 E-flat, E-flat, E-flat 00:20:59.242 --> 00:21:03.704 Thank you for the music The songs I'm singing 00:21:03.788 --> 00:21:05.789 Is it working, sir? - Extremely well, thank you, Bough. 00:21:05.874 --> 00:21:08.208 Thanks for all the joy they're... 00:21:08.293 --> 00:21:09.918 - Ow! 00:21:10.253 --> 00:21:13.422 You all right, sir? I think I can see something, sir. 00:21:13.673 --> 00:21:17.134 Oh, yeah. Shh! Come on. 00:21:36.488 --> 00:21:38.322 Here's the long one. 00:21:38.948 --> 00:21:40.532 It is a long one. 00:21:40.950 --> 00:21:42.326 Careful. 00:21:47.457 --> 00:21:49.333 - I knew it. - Shall we call for backup, sir? 00:21:49.417 --> 00:21:53.170 What? And watch some fat-bottomed bobby make our arrest for us? 00:21:53.630 --> 00:21:55.381 I don't think so. 00:21:58.635 --> 00:22:02.596 Good morning, gentlemen. Ml7 at your service. 00:22:03.640 --> 00:22:07.643 Observe, Bough, the dull incompetence of the criminal mind. 00:22:07.852 --> 00:22:11.021 It can never hope to match our level of technical expertise. 00:23:00.530 --> 00:23:02.906 - You've got it. - What do we do now, sir? 00:23:03.575 --> 00:23:05.033 Watch and learn, Bough. 00:23:09.205 --> 00:23:12.624 - It's no good, sir. They're too far ahead of us. - Have faith, Bough. They're heading south. 00:23:22.719 --> 00:23:25.220 - There they are, sir! - Just as I thought. 00:23:28.641 --> 00:23:29.766 Hang on tight, Bough. 00:23:40.904 --> 00:23:42.279 We're never gonna catch them in this. 00:23:42.739 --> 00:23:44.698 Take the wheel, Bough. I'm getting in the Aston. 00:23:44.782 --> 00:23:45.782 Sir? 00:23:49.913 --> 00:23:52.498 Change places, Bough. I'm getting out the other side. 00:23:52.582 --> 00:23:53.582 Sir? 00:24:15.939 --> 00:24:17.689 Set, Bough. Take me up. 00:24:26.282 --> 00:24:27.699 Swing me out, Bough! 00:24:33.122 --> 00:24:34.206 Whoa! 00:24:35.750 --> 00:24:36.792 Down. 00:24:42.131 --> 00:24:43.590 Up! Up! 00:24:46.427 --> 00:24:47.719 Sorry! 00:24:52.141 --> 00:24:53.600 Bough, pull out! 00:24:59.148 --> 00:25:00.357 Ow! Ow! 00:25:03.319 --> 00:25:06.154 Those idiots are right behind us. Faster! 00:25:29.762 --> 00:25:30.846 Uh-huh! 00:25:57.707 --> 00:25:58.874 Drop me here, Bough! 00:26:06.382 --> 00:26:08.508 No! No! No! 00:26:08.593 --> 00:26:10.218 Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. 00:26:49.092 --> 00:26:51.009 They're turning into the Brompton Cemetery, Bough. 00:26:51.761 --> 00:26:54.596 Get here as soon as you can. I'm going in. 00:27:02.522 --> 00:27:03.980 In a wheelchair. 00:27:04.065 --> 00:27:07.067 But Geoffrey overcame these terrible disabilities 00:27:07.485 --> 00:27:10.779 with that simple resilience and sunny optimism 00:27:10.863 --> 00:27:13.281 that so warmed all of us who knew him, 00:27:14.283 --> 00:27:16.410 spending the rest of his life in the service 00:27:16.536 --> 00:27:18.995 of the poor and disabled of this parish. 00:27:19.789 --> 00:27:23.750 It's very good. Really very good. 00:27:24.460 --> 00:27:26.920 No, no, please. No, go on. I'm sorry to interrupt. 00:27:27.338 --> 00:27:29.381 - It's very entertaining. - Who's that? 00:27:29.465 --> 00:27:31.216 That priest act of yours 00:27:31.300 --> 00:27:33.719 should keep the other prisoners entertained for hours. 00:27:34.178 --> 00:27:37.222 Oh, I'm so sorry. Where are my manners? Johnny English, 00:27:37.306 --> 00:27:40.267 British Secret Service, and you are all under arrest. 00:27:41.602 --> 00:27:43.395 I must say, you've done this whole thing very well. 00:27:43.479 --> 00:27:46.273 The attention to detail is excellent. 00:27:46.649 --> 00:27:49.985 You, the grieving granny, you're very convincing. 00:27:50.653 --> 00:27:54.448 Oh, look. Real tears. Do you get paid extra for that? 00:27:55.533 --> 00:27:56.616 Ah! 00:27:57.326 --> 00:27:58.744 What we're all here for. 00:27:58.828 --> 00:28:01.621 I know! Why don't we take a look inside? 00:28:02.874 --> 00:28:03.957 Oh! 00:28:04.041 --> 00:28:05.500 You've nailed it down! 00:28:07.503 --> 00:28:08.879 Why would you do that? 00:28:09.589 --> 00:28:12.841 I know you're gonna come back in two weeks and dig it up again. 00:28:17.221 --> 00:28:22.100 Now, what are you playing in this little vignette of deceit and villainy? 00:28:22.477 --> 00:28:23.935 I'm the hearse driver. 00:28:24.020 --> 00:28:31.693 - You're the hearse driver? - Yes, sir. 00:28:32.236 --> 00:28:34.112 Ah! A-ha! 00:28:35.656 --> 00:28:38.825 There you are, Gunther. 00:28:39.202 --> 00:28:42.537 Uh, I do hope he hasn't made a nuisance of himself. 00:28:43.748 --> 00:28:46.249 I'm Doctor... 00:28:49.170 --> 00:28:53.131 Bough, of the Lunatic Response Unit. 00:28:53.716 --> 00:28:57.511 I'm afraid Gunther here wasn't supposed to be released until 2028. 00:28:57.595 --> 00:28:59.638 - Isn't that right, Gunther? 00:29:00.890 --> 00:29:04.851 Yes, yes, there's been a most monumental cock-up. 00:29:05.728 --> 00:29:06.853 Um... 00:29:07.230 --> 00:29:11.983 If you'll excuse me, with the deepest respect, utmost sympathy. 00:29:12.360 --> 00:29:13.443 Uh... 00:29:13.736 --> 00:29:15.570 He hasn't urinated on anyone, has he? 00:29:15.905 --> 00:29:17.447 - No. - No, no. 00:29:17.532 --> 00:29:21.868 That's a blessing. Are you gonna give me the gun, Gunther? 00:29:27.917 --> 00:29:29.459 There. That wasn't too difficult, was it? 00:29:31.462 --> 00:29:33.421 Are you going to come home now? 00:29:41.222 --> 00:29:44.599 Oh! In the van! Yes, yes, we are going in the van. 00:29:44.851 --> 00:29:46.101 Yes, yeah. 00:29:46.185 --> 00:29:48.186 - Vroom, vroom! 00:29:48.271 --> 00:29:49.437 Yes. Yeah. 00:29:52.984 --> 00:29:54.943 Yes. He's waving goodbye. Goodbye, everyone. 00:29:55.194 --> 00:29:57.320 - ALL: Goodbye. - Goodbye, Gunther. 00:29:57.780 --> 00:30:00.448 Mind the nice dead people. There we go. 00:30:05.496 --> 00:30:09.666 Oh! We'll just go to the path here. There. Big step. 00:30:10.293 --> 00:30:13.044 It's a graveyard. It's where they bring people when they pass... 00:30:13.129 --> 00:30:15.088 Yes, yes, all right, Bough. You can stop now. 00:30:15.172 --> 00:30:17.257 For appearances' sake, I'll just hold your arm, sir. 00:30:17.341 --> 00:30:19.301 Yes, yes. Just keep walking. 00:30:19.719 --> 00:30:21.678 In fact, run, run, run! 00:30:28.644 --> 00:30:31.563 I can't believe I've done this. 00:30:32.481 --> 00:30:36.818 I mean, I really cannot believe I've done this! 00:30:41.449 --> 00:30:43.992 You see, 200 years ago, 00:30:44.660 --> 00:30:49.539 my family should have inherited the throne of England, 00:30:50.249 --> 00:30:52.334 but they were cast aside. 00:30:53.294 --> 00:30:59.257 Well, in a few very short days, it will be back where it belongs. 00:31:02.303 --> 00:31:03.345 With me. 00:31:04.889 --> 00:31:10.477 Shall I try it on? Yes? No? Maybe? 00:31:10.853 --> 00:31:14.230 To make you King, we need the Archbishop of Canterbury to do that. 00:31:14.690 --> 00:31:17.150 The Archbishop of Canterbury 00:31:17.234 --> 00:31:20.862 is being taken care of even as we speak. 00:31:33.459 --> 00:31:37.045 There's only one thing, sir. What are we going to do about English? 00:31:40.049 --> 00:31:43.885 If I were you, I wouldn't worry too much about English. 00:31:43.970 --> 00:31:47.806 He is no threat to us. I had his flat bugged. 00:32:03.280 --> 00:32:04.364 Ow! 00:32:15.251 --> 00:32:18.878 Clearly, the aptly named English is a fool. 00:32:19.255 --> 00:32:22.674 He might be a fool, but he's a fool who keeps showing up. 00:32:23.134 --> 00:32:25.885 Well, the next time he shows up, 00:32:27.054 --> 00:32:28.763 eliminate him. 00:32:29.807 --> 00:32:30.807 Thank you. 00:32:30.891 --> 00:32:33.143 Dieter Klein and Klaus Vendetta, sir. 00:32:33.269 --> 00:32:37.272 Released from prison six months ago, 327 convictions between them. 00:32:37.773 --> 00:32:40.358 Armed robbery, grievous bodily harm 00:32:40.443 --> 00:32:42.652 and combined parking fines of more than 400... 00:32:42.737 --> 00:32:45.572 Yes, yes, all right. Thank you, Bough. I think we get the picture. 00:32:46.365 --> 00:32:49.075 The point is, sir, that Vendetta and Klein 00:32:49.160 --> 00:32:52.746 are both in the employ of Monsieur Sauvage. 00:32:53.330 --> 00:32:55.498 - Pascal Sauvage? - Precisely, sir. 00:32:56.375 --> 00:32:59.002 But you're not suggesting Sauvage is involved? 00:32:59.128 --> 00:33:01.296 I think he's more than just involved, sir. 00:33:01.464 --> 00:33:03.715 I'm convinced he's up to his French neck in it. 00:33:03.799 --> 00:33:07.135 Don't be absurd. Sauvage employs thousands of people. 00:33:07.219 --> 00:33:09.387 Just because two of them are villains doesn't mean that he is. 00:33:09.764 --> 00:33:12.891 No, I want him discounted from this investigation immediately. 00:33:13.851 --> 00:33:15.018 Yes, sir. 00:33:19.482 --> 00:33:24.069 All right. Tonight I shall be at Sauvage's reception for the new French ambassador. 00:33:24.153 --> 00:33:26.112 Any developments, you can reach me there. 00:33:26.447 --> 00:33:30.533 Apart from that, I don't want you within a hundred miles of the man. 00:33:31.327 --> 00:33:32.410 Absolutely, sir. 00:33:33.162 --> 00:33:36.748 Requisition order, Ml7 quartermasters for immediate supply. 00:33:36.999 --> 00:33:38.917 One military transport plane, fully fuelled, 00:33:39.001 --> 00:33:41.127 with permission for night-time city over-flight. 00:33:41.212 --> 00:33:43.546 Two night camouflage parachutes, plus reserves, 00:33:43.631 --> 00:33:46.382 plus neoprene bodysuits, twice, in black. 00:33:46.467 --> 00:33:47.801 I've never liked the navy blue. 00:33:48.177 --> 00:33:50.678 And a 40-inch chest for me 'cause I need the sleeve length. 00:33:51.722 --> 00:33:53.139 - Morning, Felch. - Morning. 00:33:53.432 --> 00:33:57.769 Oh, and two special forces signet rings, primed and colour-coded. 00:33:57.895 --> 00:34:00.271 - What's all this for, sir? - For tonight's operation, Bough. 00:34:00.648 --> 00:34:02.690 We're going to break into Sauvage's headquarters. 00:34:03.400 --> 00:34:05.527 - But I thought Pegasus said... - You let me worry about Pegasus. 00:34:05.611 --> 00:34:07.112 I know that Sauvage is behind all this, 00:34:07.196 --> 00:34:09.072 and tonight we're gonna get the evidence to prove it. 00:34:10.658 --> 00:34:14.327 - Something wrong, sir? - Did that sound like Felch to you? 00:34:44.441 --> 00:34:45.608 Bough... 00:35:01.709 --> 00:35:03.585 You, upstairs. 00:35:18.309 --> 00:35:19.350 Ow! 00:35:53.802 --> 00:35:55.053 Can you see him, Bough? 00:35:55.971 --> 00:35:57.305 He's on the upper level, sir. 00:36:03.896 --> 00:36:04.979 Got him. 00:36:12.029 --> 00:36:16.407 And like a coiled viper, he strikes. 00:36:25.793 --> 00:36:28.169 So what you're saying, sir, is there must have been two of them? 00:36:28.629 --> 00:36:31.005 Oh, at least, Bough. Possibly four. 00:36:31.131 --> 00:36:32.382 I wonder why I didn't see them. 00:36:32.675 --> 00:36:34.634 You mustn't dwell on your mistakes, Bough. 00:36:34.718 --> 00:36:37.553 - You must learn from them, then move on. - Yes, sir. 00:36:40.683 --> 00:36:43.101 - So where were you, sir? - Just drop it, Bough! 00:36:47.231 --> 00:36:48.439 Ah! 00:36:48.524 --> 00:36:51.150 - What is it, sir? - That bike. 00:36:52.695 --> 00:36:54.404 You get things sorted out for tonight. 00:37:10.754 --> 00:37:12.505 Well, well, we meet again. 00:37:13.507 --> 00:37:16.467 Mr English. What a pleasant surprise! 00:37:16.552 --> 00:37:18.386 I wondered when you might show up again. 00:37:18.762 --> 00:37:23.182 On the contrary, Miss Campbell. It is not I who keeps showing up. It's you. 00:37:24.685 --> 00:37:26.978 - Do you like sushi? - Hmm? 00:37:29.106 --> 00:37:32.817 Oh, sushi! Oh! I practically live off the stuff. 00:37:33.235 --> 00:37:36.612 You might say the mysteries of the Orient are no mystery to me. 00:37:46.582 --> 00:37:49.417 - Sake? - Ah! Sake. 00:38:05.517 --> 00:38:08.519 Now then, perhaps you can explain how it is 00:38:08.604 --> 00:38:11.064 that I run into you at two crime scenes 00:38:11.148 --> 00:38:14.609 and then can't find any record of you on a single government computer. 00:38:15.319 --> 00:38:16.736 Shouldn't you ask the government that? 00:38:18.072 --> 00:38:20.740 I am the government and I'm asking you. 00:38:25.913 --> 00:38:26.954 Let me. 00:38:28.874 --> 00:38:29.874 Hmm! 00:38:29.958 --> 00:38:31.292 You're brave. 00:38:31.460 --> 00:38:34.170 They say that sea urchin's the ultimate acquired taste. 00:38:34.463 --> 00:38:37.215 It's a personal favourite of mine. 00:38:42.346 --> 00:38:44.931 I think people are put off by how it feeds through its bottom. 00:38:46.600 --> 00:38:48.851 - Would you excuse me for a moment? - Mmm. 00:39:08.956 --> 00:39:11.666 Excuse me. Sorry. I'm from Ml7. Sorry. I'm a secret agent. I am... 00:39:31.103 --> 00:39:33.813 - Everything set, Bough? - Just about, sir. 00:39:34.523 --> 00:39:37.733 Actually, sir, do you mind if I run through the plan one more time? 00:39:38.026 --> 00:39:40.695 - No, no. - These are the two buildings here. 00:39:41.113 --> 00:39:43.823 This one is our target, Sauvage's headquarters, 00:39:43.907 --> 00:39:45.450 right next to the City Hospital. 00:39:45.742 --> 00:39:48.744 I jump first and land on the south side of the roof, 00:39:48.829 --> 00:39:52.039 abseil down 14 floors and cut through this window here. 00:39:52.207 --> 00:39:56.085 I then land on the east side of the roof and abseil down 12 floors. 00:39:56.170 --> 00:39:59.046 Where you wait for my signal that I've disabled the alarm system. 00:39:59.131 --> 00:40:01.799 - Yes. - You then break into this window here, 00:40:01.884 --> 00:40:05.136 work your way along the secure corridor and penetrate Sauvage's office. 00:40:05.220 --> 00:40:07.722 - Yes, yes. - Is that okay, sir? 00:40:07.848 --> 00:40:10.933 It's been okay ever since I thought up the idea, Bough. 00:40:16.106 --> 00:40:18.900 Oh, I nearly forgot, sir. Your laser beacon. 00:40:19.610 --> 00:40:21.944 - My what? - Your laser beacon! 00:40:22.029 --> 00:40:24.530 It'll guide you onto Sauvage's building. 00:40:24.865 --> 00:40:27.950 Your dependence on hardware really does amuse me, Bough. 00:40:28.494 --> 00:40:30.912 I've been dropped into the Kalahari Desert 00:40:31.288 --> 00:40:35.082 carrying nothing more than a toothbrush and a packet of sherbet lemons, 00:40:36.084 --> 00:40:39.504 and I still found my way to Bulawayo before Ramadan. 00:40:41.256 --> 00:40:43.674 So thank you, Bough, but no thank you. 00:40:47.721 --> 00:40:49.388 - Bough, go! 00:40:49.473 --> 00:40:51.682 Geronimo! 00:41:20.546 --> 00:41:23.381 Fandango! 00:41:46.238 --> 00:41:47.321 Ugh! 00:41:55.914 --> 00:41:56.998 Right. 00:42:16.268 --> 00:42:17.602 Alarm's disabled, sir. 00:42:17.686 --> 00:42:18.853 Roger that, Bough. 00:42:57.184 --> 00:42:59.185 This is worse than I thought, Bough. 00:42:59.895 --> 00:43:03.522 Sauvage has got some kind of laboratory set up here. 00:43:04.232 --> 00:43:07.151 God knows what kind of sick operation he's running. 00:43:20.832 --> 00:43:23.334 My God, what have they done to you? 00:43:24.461 --> 00:43:26.420 They've taken some of my blood. 00:43:27.756 --> 00:43:30.800 - Bastards! - It's only for tests. 00:43:30.884 --> 00:43:32.927 Of course it is. Come on, my friend. 00:43:33.011 --> 00:43:35.096 Let's get you out of here before they take anything else. 00:43:46.191 --> 00:43:49.193 Good evening, Dr Frankenstein. 00:43:49.903 --> 00:43:51.445 This way, please. 00:43:51.530 --> 00:43:53.155 Come on, come on. I haven't got all night. 00:43:55.117 --> 00:43:57.785 And you, you angels of death. 00:43:58.036 --> 00:44:00.371 About turn. Come on, let's go. 00:44:00.455 --> 00:44:01.789 Come on, come on. Keep moving. 00:44:02.916 --> 00:44:06.460 Come on. Over there. I know what you're doing here. And you. 00:44:06.878 --> 00:44:10.089 Come on. Quicker. Quicker. Come on. Over there. 00:44:11.967 --> 00:44:13.342 Now then, 00:44:13.427 --> 00:44:16.554 perhaps you could direct me to your evil paymaster. 00:44:17.639 --> 00:44:21.726 - What are you talking about? - You know exactly what I'm talking about. 00:44:21.810 --> 00:44:25.479 Where is the office of Pascal Sauvage? 00:44:51.506 --> 00:44:53.048 Are you coming over here in a minute, sir? 00:44:56.386 --> 00:44:57.720 I'm from Ml7. 00:44:58.597 --> 00:45:01.390 This has been a test of your emergency response systems, 00:45:01.475 --> 00:45:04.351 and I have to say, you've all done extremely well. 00:45:04.978 --> 00:45:09.231 Right. Well, I'll leave you to it. And, get well soon. 00:45:15.822 --> 00:45:19.742 Oh, God! 00:45:38.637 --> 00:45:40.179 Sir. Sir. 00:45:48.480 --> 00:45:50.147 Did you just land on the wrong building? 00:45:51.358 --> 00:45:54.443 I did a precautionary sweep of the immediate environment. 00:45:55.237 --> 00:45:56.403 Right. 00:45:58.657 --> 00:46:00.074 - And everything was fine. - Good. 00:46:01.284 --> 00:46:02.576 Okay, let's go. 00:46:07.415 --> 00:46:10.918 I'll be downstairs at the reception... 00:46:20.053 --> 00:46:23.848 - That's far enough. - Well, good evening. 00:46:24.599 --> 00:46:26.851 - Perhaps you'd like to have this as well. - What is it? 00:46:26.935 --> 00:46:28.102 Let me show you. 00:46:30.856 --> 00:46:32.940 Well executed, Bough, but completely redundant. 00:46:33.024 --> 00:46:36.026 - How do you mean, sir? - Super-strength muscle relaxant. 00:46:36.361 --> 00:46:39.113 When he wakes up, he'll be as floppy as a damp old sock. 00:46:45.954 --> 00:46:47.037 What's this? 00:47:02.470 --> 00:47:06.140 That's the face of the Archbishop of Canterbury. 00:47:10.687 --> 00:47:11.854 What are they doing? 00:47:16.610 --> 00:47:19.486 What's this got to do with the Crown Jewels? 00:47:42.218 --> 00:47:43.344 Bough. 00:48:01.529 --> 00:48:02.905 English. 00:48:02.989 --> 00:48:08.869 A people whose empire once covered one quarter of the surface of the earth. 00:48:09.454 --> 00:48:11.413 Alas, no longer. 00:48:12.207 --> 00:48:15.793 Now, my friends ask me, "Pascal, how can you be so interested 00:48:15.877 --> 00:48:18.712 "in such a backward, grotty little country?" 00:48:19.172 --> 00:48:22.716 My answer is simple. The Queen. 00:48:23.551 --> 00:48:26.887 The Queen has more power in her tiny white gloves 00:48:26.972 --> 00:48:30.557 than any other head of state in the entire world. 00:48:30.767 --> 00:48:33.102 She can declare war or make peace, 00:48:33.186 --> 00:48:34.770 and most intriguingly, 00:48:35.772 --> 00:48:40.651 she can seize any piece of land which takes her fancy. 00:48:41.069 --> 00:48:46.240 Of course, the Queen never uses the enormous power afforded to her. 00:48:47.242 --> 00:48:50.953 But imagine someone who would use that power. 00:48:52.122 --> 00:48:54.790 Imagine, say, me. 00:48:57.335 --> 00:48:59.586 How could he do that, sir? How could he make himself King? 00:49:00.797 --> 00:49:02.172 The Archbishop. 00:49:12.225 --> 00:49:13.267 Ow! 00:49:15.603 --> 00:49:17.730 Hands up. There's a good fellow. 00:49:18.606 --> 00:49:21.483 Heavily armed for a late night at the office, wouldn't you say, Bough? 00:49:21.568 --> 00:49:25.404 You fool, English. You'll never get out of the building alive. 00:49:25.655 --> 00:49:27.948 I'd save your breath for my questioning. 00:49:28.158 --> 00:49:30.117 I'm not telling you anything. 00:49:30.368 --> 00:49:31.535 Incorrect. 00:49:33.288 --> 00:49:34.580 Sodium pentothal. 00:49:35.290 --> 00:49:37.958 I won't lie to you. It's a truth serum. 00:49:39.377 --> 00:49:43.380 Now then, why does Sauvage want to have himself crowned? 00:49:44.090 --> 00:49:46.300 You have no idea what's going on here, do you? 00:49:47.677 --> 00:49:50.137 It would be funny if it wasn't so... 00:49:51.139 --> 00:49:52.139 What? 00:49:58.813 --> 00:50:01.190 - He's talking gibberish, sir. - Yes, I can hear that, Bough. 00:50:03.401 --> 00:50:05.569 - He's collapsed onto me, sir. - Yes, I can see that, Bough. 00:50:06.863 --> 00:50:09.073 You don't think you could've got the syringes mixed up, do you, sir? 00:50:09.157 --> 00:50:11.158 - What do you mean? - Given the guard outside the truth serum 00:50:11.242 --> 00:50:12.534 and given Klein the muscle relaxant? 00:50:14.412 --> 00:50:15.496 Ah! 00:50:15.580 --> 00:50:18.248 Don't be ridiculous, Bough. I think I know my right from my left. 00:50:19.793 --> 00:50:22.127 - Sir? - Oh, bugger it! 00:50:24.422 --> 00:50:26.256 Bough, take "flodd." 00:50:26.341 --> 00:50:27.841 Take what, sir? 00:50:27.926 --> 00:50:30.469 Flodd. Schlage. 00:50:30.553 --> 00:50:32.054 I'm not quite getting that second word, sir. 00:50:32.138 --> 00:50:33.639 Schlage! 00:50:34.182 --> 00:50:36.016 - Write it down, sir. - Schlage! 00:50:36.101 --> 00:50:38.727 Yes! Schlage! 00:50:40.772 --> 00:50:43.148 "C! C-A..." 00:50:43.358 --> 00:50:45.734 Car! Take the car! We didn't come by car, sir. We came by plane. 00:50:48.238 --> 00:50:49.530 Bugger off! 00:50:50.198 --> 00:50:51.365 Hold it right there. 00:50:53.618 --> 00:50:56.245 - What's wrong with them? - They got their... I'm not telling you. 00:50:57.038 --> 00:50:58.122 Wrong answer. 00:51:00.166 --> 00:51:01.416 What is it with you two? 00:51:01.835 --> 00:51:02.876 Ah! 00:51:05.630 --> 00:51:06.755 Let's get out of here. 00:51:07.173 --> 00:51:08.674 Sorry, but who are you, exactly? 00:51:09.342 --> 00:51:12.052 Special Agent Campbell. I'm attached to Interpol in Paris. 00:51:12.387 --> 00:51:13.637 We've been watching Sauvage for months. 00:51:15.140 --> 00:51:16.140 Why? 00:51:16.224 --> 00:51:17.432 Because every major convict 00:51:17.517 --> 00:51:19.726 released from a Sauvage prison in the last six months 00:51:19.811 --> 00:51:21.687 has been employed by one of his companies. 00:51:22.230 --> 00:51:24.815 We believe he's recruiting them for a major criminal conspiracy. 00:51:24.899 --> 00:51:26.275 We just don't know what yet. 00:51:28.945 --> 00:51:31.113 - What did he say? - Pegasus! 00:51:31.239 --> 00:51:33.323 We have to report to Pegasus! 00:51:34.242 --> 00:51:35.826 Oh, no, sir. No, no, no, no. 00:51:35.910 --> 00:51:38.495 - How do we get out of here? - Hey, you! 00:51:38.997 --> 00:51:40.539 What you did to me really hurt. 00:51:43.001 --> 00:51:46.378 Yeah. Sorry about that. How do we get out of here without being seen? 00:51:47.547 --> 00:51:48.630 Okay. 00:51:49.007 --> 00:51:51.633 Left by the water fountain, right by the fire exit, 00:51:51.759 --> 00:51:52.926 then to the elevator at the end. 00:51:53.011 --> 00:51:54.761 - Thank you. - Oh, my God. 00:51:56.097 --> 00:51:57.514 Nice job, Bough. 00:51:57.599 --> 00:51:59.016 Left, sir. Left! 00:52:00.685 --> 00:52:03.770 Sir, you can't go to Sauvage's reception in this state. 00:52:03.897 --> 00:52:06.148 The effect of the drug has practically worn off, Bough. 00:52:06.774 --> 00:52:08.483 I'm fline. 00:52:08.610 --> 00:52:10.360 Schline. Uh, gline. 00:52:20.872 --> 00:52:22.122 Monsieur. 00:52:22.332 --> 00:52:23.790 Ah! Thank you. 00:52:27.795 --> 00:52:29.796 - Would you like another? - Please. 00:52:36.679 --> 00:52:37.721 Thank you. 00:52:43.645 --> 00:52:45.395 What in God's name? 00:52:45.605 --> 00:52:48.148 Ah! Foreign Sebletarary. 00:52:48.483 --> 00:52:49.650 Um... 00:52:52.028 --> 00:52:53.070 Ah! 00:52:54.489 --> 00:52:55.822 Shall we dance? 00:53:45.581 --> 00:53:47.040 - Excuse me, sir? - Yes, Bough? 00:53:47.125 --> 00:53:49.126 I'm very sorry to interrupt. I need to... 00:53:49.210 --> 00:53:51.378 Ah, Pascal, how nice to see you again. 00:53:51.546 --> 00:53:53.547 - Enjoying the party? - Splendid affair. 00:53:54.340 --> 00:53:58.760 I was until I was informed that your man English 00:53:58.845 --> 00:54:02.306 and his curious boyfriend here have spent the evening 00:54:02.390 --> 00:54:06.059 breaking into my office and assaulting my staff. 00:54:06.227 --> 00:54:08.020 Is this true, Bough? 00:54:08.563 --> 00:54:09.730 Well, we... We... 00:54:19.574 --> 00:54:21.408 What in God's name do you think you're up to? 00:54:21.743 --> 00:54:23.327 - Well... - Sir, if I could just offer... 00:54:23.411 --> 00:54:24.411 Go home, Bough! 00:54:25.079 --> 00:54:26.246 Now! 00:54:27.248 --> 00:54:29.666 I gave you direct orders not to meddle with Sauvage. 00:54:29.751 --> 00:54:32.711 What do you do? You break into his office and assault two of his staff. 00:54:32.962 --> 00:54:36.256 Then you march in here, loaded with God only knows what, 00:54:36.424 --> 00:54:37.966 and insult the foreign secretary. 00:54:38.051 --> 00:54:40.844 I haven't encountered such behaviour in Whitehall in 30 years. 00:54:40.928 --> 00:54:42.888 - But... - There are no "buts," English. 00:54:43.765 --> 00:54:47.309 You're off the case. Your security clearance is hereby cancelled. 00:54:47.393 --> 00:54:50.771 After a three-month leave of absence, you will return at your old grade. 00:54:51.064 --> 00:54:53.106 And I hope never to hear your name again. 00:55:47.578 --> 00:55:49.371 English has seen too much. 00:55:49.455 --> 00:55:51.581 We go to plan B. 00:55:51.999 --> 00:55:57.295 Get rid of the fake Archbishop and green-light the visit to Her Majesty. 00:55:57.422 --> 00:56:01.174 And then this pathetic country can humiliate itself 00:56:01.259 --> 00:56:03.427 by crowning me officially. 00:56:30.788 --> 00:56:33.999 That's a letter of abdication renouncing your claims to the throne 00:56:34.083 --> 00:56:36.084 and the claims of your entire family. 00:56:37.920 --> 00:56:39.045 Sign it. 00:56:47.555 --> 00:56:48.680 Never. 00:57:04.155 --> 00:57:05.447 - Yes? - Prime Minister, 00:57:05.531 --> 00:57:08.325 I'm sorry to call so late, but I'm afraid the Queen has abdicated. 00:57:08.409 --> 00:57:09.618 What? 00:57:09.869 --> 00:57:14.122 Abdicated? But that's not possible. 00:57:14.499 --> 00:57:16.041 I only wish that were true. 00:57:16.626 --> 00:57:18.835 You know what, let me talk to her. Maybe she just... 00:57:18.920 --> 00:57:20.086 Pascal, she's gone. 00:57:21.464 --> 00:57:23.173 Now, my people have spent the last 10 hours 00:57:23.257 --> 00:57:25.717 trying to track down the rightful heir to the throne 00:57:25.801 --> 00:57:29.930 and they've come up with a name, which they've double-checked. 00:57:31.807 --> 00:57:33.058 Who is it? 00:57:33.267 --> 00:57:35.519 - It's you. - No! 00:57:41.108 --> 00:57:43.443 In the wake of the return of the Crown Jewels 00:57:43.528 --> 00:57:45.570 to a police station in North London, 00:57:45.655 --> 00:57:48.406 Pascal Sauvage has requested that his coronation 00:57:48.491 --> 00:57:50.283 take place this Thursday. 00:57:50.868 --> 00:57:54.246 In the House, the prime minister said he was looking forward to the ceremony 00:57:54.455 --> 00:57:57.457 and he believed that Monsieur Sauvage will make a fine king 00:57:57.792 --> 00:57:59.042 and will bring all that is best 00:57:59.126 --> 00:58:01.670 about modern Europe to our ancient institution. 00:58:10.054 --> 00:58:12.138 Get your car keys. We've got work to do. 00:58:12.890 --> 00:58:13.890 Miss Campbell. 00:58:13.975 --> 00:58:16.184 Sauvage is heading back to his chateau in France. 00:58:16.394 --> 00:58:19.896 And he's invited 13 of the richest criminal masterminds in the world 00:58:19.981 --> 00:58:21.147 to meet him there. 00:58:21.357 --> 00:58:24.150 I'm sorry, Miss Campbell. I'm off the case. 00:58:24.485 --> 00:58:26.069 It's been reassigned. 00:58:26.153 --> 00:58:28.822 I know. Reassigned to me. 00:58:32.076 --> 00:58:35.495 - Look, I want you with me, Johnny. - Look, just leave me alone. 00:58:35.663 --> 00:58:36.663 What are you gonna do? 00:58:36.747 --> 00:58:38.999 Sit here in this grotty flat feeling sorry for yourself? 00:58:39.625 --> 00:58:42.043 Or are you gonna get out there and save your country? 00:58:44.171 --> 00:58:45.422 I'm gonna sit in the flat. 00:58:46.007 --> 00:58:49.884 - Johnny, this is ridiculous. - I'm a spent force. 00:58:52.597 --> 00:58:54.222 Spent, my ass. 00:58:59.687 --> 00:59:01.062 Ow! 00:59:02.481 --> 00:59:04.983 Will you please stop? 00:59:18.039 --> 00:59:19.164 I'll just be a minute. 01:00:05.836 --> 01:00:08.755 It'll be nightfall in an hour. Then we can strike out for the chateau. 01:00:09.298 --> 01:00:12.467 The fact is, the moment Sauvage gets that crown on his head, 01:00:12.551 --> 01:00:15.595 he'll be able to do whatever he likes with the country that I love, 01:00:15.763 --> 01:00:18.390 and that is why you and I have got to stop him. 01:00:20.768 --> 01:00:24.062 - Relishing the thought? - Something like that. 01:00:26.774 --> 01:00:29.317 I suppose you've made love to lots of women, haven't you, Johnny? 01:00:33.239 --> 01:00:34.364 Um... 01:00:36.158 --> 01:00:38.952 You know, one does one's best. 01:00:41.122 --> 01:00:42.414 It's just... 01:00:43.457 --> 01:00:46.960 Well, it's been three years since my fiancé left me, 01:00:47.044 --> 01:00:50.922 and since then, I haven't made love to anyone. 01:00:52.550 --> 01:00:54.134 But then I met you, 01:00:55.636 --> 01:00:58.638 and I felt this hunger, 01:00:59.473 --> 01:01:02.976 deep down inside. I wanted to say things to you. 01:01:03.060 --> 01:01:05.353 I wanted to do things to you 01:01:05.438 --> 01:01:09.482 that I haven't wanted to do in a very, very, very long time. 01:01:13.988 --> 01:01:15.363 What, uh... 01:01:16.907 --> 01:01:19.033 What sort of things are we talking about? 01:01:19.660 --> 01:01:21.536 Things like punching you in the face. 01:01:22.037 --> 01:01:23.997 Things like kicking you in the backside 01:01:24.081 --> 01:01:26.374 for being such a pompous, know-nothing asshole. 01:01:27.168 --> 01:01:30.462 But then I started to see beyond the idiot that everybody else saw. 01:01:31.172 --> 01:01:33.339 I started to see the man on the inside, 01:01:33.924 --> 01:01:38.052 a man who was determined to do his duty, no matter what or who lay in his way. 01:01:38.846 --> 01:01:41.931 And I began to feel other things for him, 01:01:43.100 --> 01:01:46.519 to wanna do other things for him. 01:01:47.897 --> 01:01:49.606 Things... 01:01:49.690 --> 01:01:52.692 Involving plastic toys and soft cheese? 01:01:54.695 --> 01:01:57.739 - What? - What? What? 01:01:57.865 --> 01:02:00.074 You're toying with me, aren't you? 01:02:00.159 --> 01:02:02.619 You're telling me to stop in the gentlest way you know how. 01:02:03.412 --> 01:02:04.746 No. No... 01:02:04.830 --> 01:02:07.040 You're such a special person, Johnny, 01:02:07.124 --> 01:02:09.334 not to take advantage of me while I'm vulnerable. 01:02:09.794 --> 01:02:14.464 - No. Well... - So thank you for being such a gentleman. 01:02:18.260 --> 01:02:19.469 Not at all. 01:02:41.325 --> 01:02:43.326 I know what you're thinking, Miss Campbell. 01:02:43.577 --> 01:02:47.413 You're thinking, "If we don't pull this off, God knows what might happen to England." 01:02:47.915 --> 01:02:50.583 Actually, I was thinking there must be a better way in than that pipe. 01:02:52.419 --> 01:02:53.545 Well, there isn't. 01:02:53.629 --> 01:02:56.881 I've analysed it from every possible angle, and this is the best option. 01:02:57.633 --> 01:03:01.302 I'll go in first, and if there's a clear way through, I'll call down. Okay? 01:03:03.389 --> 01:03:04.597 Johnny. 01:03:05.391 --> 01:03:08.351 - Be careful. - I'm always careful. 01:03:08.936 --> 01:03:10.103 Oh! 01:03:59.820 --> 01:04:01.946 - Gentlemen. 01:04:02.698 --> 01:04:07.952 In a few hours' time, I will become the next king of England. 01:04:26.889 --> 01:04:28.014 No. 01:04:43.697 --> 01:04:45.490 Ha! 01:04:45.574 --> 01:04:47.825 - How did you get here? - Up the ladder. 01:04:48.827 --> 01:04:50.954 Look, pull yourself together. It's only a bit of poo. 01:04:54.959 --> 01:04:58.336 It's cold! Oh! It's cold! 01:04:58.462 --> 01:05:04.384 What is the one commodity the world never seems to run out of? 01:05:06.053 --> 01:05:08.346 Criminals, gentlemen. 01:05:08.430 --> 01:05:10.807 - Lawbreakers. 01:05:10.891 --> 01:05:12.850 Every nation in the world 01:05:12.935 --> 01:05:17.146 struggles with the issue of overcrowded prisons. 01:05:17.439 --> 01:05:22.026 So, what do we do with all these villains? 01:05:22.403 --> 01:05:24.988 Find the solution to that problem 01:05:25.072 --> 01:05:30.159 and the governments of the world would pay you through their nose. 01:05:30.744 --> 01:05:34.580 Fortunately, I have found a solution. 01:05:34.915 --> 01:05:39.669 We empty every prison on the entire planet, 01:05:40.337 --> 01:05:45.383 we take the resulting tidal wave of human scum 01:05:45.718 --> 01:05:47.593 and we put it here. 01:05:52.766 --> 01:05:54.809 The moment I am crowned King, 01:05:54.893 --> 01:05:58.229 I will turn England into the largest prison 01:05:58.313 --> 01:06:00.606 in the history of the world. 01:06:02.443 --> 01:06:07.739 210,000 square miles of prime real estate, 01:06:08.032 --> 01:06:14.162 conveniently separated from true civilisation by 20 miles of ocean 01:06:14.538 --> 01:06:16.581 - and soon to be available... - Come on. 01:06:16.665 --> 01:06:21.836 ...for the entire world to dump its human waste in. 01:06:22.129 --> 01:06:24.714 According to current projections, 01:06:24.798 --> 01:06:30.136 we will not run out of prison space for the next 500 years. 01:06:30.554 --> 01:06:35.016 So, tonight, one, and only one, of you 01:06:35.100 --> 01:06:41.939 will leave here owning 49% of this venture. 01:06:43.650 --> 01:06:48.071 So that's his little game. We must get hold of that DVD. 01:06:48.155 --> 01:06:49.614 But how, Johnny? There's only two of us. 01:06:50.824 --> 01:06:53.493 You're young, Miss Campbell, and inexperienced. 01:06:53.869 --> 01:06:55.703 What you seem to have forgotten is that 01:06:55.788 --> 01:06:57.914 nobody knows we are here. 01:06:58.457 --> 01:07:01.667 At our disposal, we have the vital element of surprise. 01:07:02.878 --> 01:07:05.254 Now, my plan is simple but effective. 01:07:05.672 --> 01:07:08.424 I shall drop from the gallery at this end of the room 01:07:08.509 --> 01:07:09.884 and take Sauvage prisoner. 01:07:10.385 --> 01:07:13.054 You will then enter from the far door, 01:07:13.138 --> 01:07:14.722 cutting off any means of escape. 01:07:15.015 --> 01:07:19.352 Then, using Sauvage as a hostage, we'll get the hell out of here. Clear? 01:07:28.278 --> 01:07:30.863 Get 'em up, you French ponce. 01:07:31.698 --> 01:07:35.076 But, Mr English, I'm gobsmacked! 01:07:35.702 --> 01:07:37.995 What an unexpected surprise. 01:07:38.413 --> 01:07:41.457 Surprises are very much my speciality, Sauvage. 01:07:42.960 --> 01:07:44.710 I think we've seen enough of this. 01:07:46.839 --> 01:07:51.676 I know exactly what you're planning, and I'm here to put a stop to it. 01:07:53.470 --> 01:07:56.722 My bottom will be king of England before you are. 01:07:57.808 --> 01:07:59.308 Wrong again. 01:08:00.144 --> 01:08:02.895 Perhaps you'd care to look behind you. 01:08:03.188 --> 01:08:05.523 Oh, please. 01:08:09.695 --> 01:08:10.736 Lorna! 01:08:13.407 --> 01:08:14.574 I'm sorry, Johnny. 01:08:16.076 --> 01:08:21.956 Well, I'm afraid that we'll have to conclude the floor show for tonight. 01:08:22.166 --> 01:08:24.041 Not so fast, Sauvage. 01:08:24.585 --> 01:08:28.421 You may have taken me, but you'll never take England. 01:08:28.755 --> 01:08:31.591 Not as long as I have breath in my body 01:08:31.675 --> 01:08:34.010 or a bullet in my gun. 01:08:43.437 --> 01:08:47.440 You know, Mr English, I'm going to miss you. Really. 01:08:47.524 --> 01:08:50.026 You're very entertaining. I thank you. 01:08:50.819 --> 01:08:51.861 Take them away. 01:08:56.283 --> 01:08:57.366 Good morning, everybody! 01:08:58.577 --> 01:08:59.952 And welcome to The Breakfast Show. 01:09:03.040 --> 01:09:06.459 As the crowds are gathering here for the crowning of our first French king 01:09:06.543 --> 01:09:08.211 since the year 1066, 01:09:08.295 --> 01:09:10.504 we ask you to call us here at London FM 01:09:10.589 --> 01:09:13.716 with the top 10 things you most love about the French. 01:09:13.800 --> 01:09:16.344 We haven't had any calls yet, at all, 01:09:16.428 --> 01:09:18.804 but the lines are still open and I'll give you that number again. 01:09:20.224 --> 01:09:21.224 0-2-0-7... 01:09:27.231 --> 01:09:28.648 This is not good, Johnny. 01:09:29.483 --> 01:09:30.900 We've got to think of something. 01:09:32.986 --> 01:09:35.488 Wait a minute. I've got an idea. 01:09:36.198 --> 01:09:37.698 Hop! Hop! 01:09:38.325 --> 01:09:41.160 Hop! And hop! And stop! 01:09:41.828 --> 01:09:43.955 Now, are you familiar 01:09:44.039 --> 01:09:47.708 with the shaman throat warblers of the Guatemalan delta? 01:09:48.126 --> 01:09:49.126 What? 01:09:49.378 --> 01:09:51.128 It has long been their belief 01:09:51.213 --> 01:09:55.591 that a whistle pitched at the precise resonant frequency of a metal lock 01:09:55.676 --> 01:10:00.263 will vibrate the levers in such a way that the door will simply swing open. 01:10:00.806 --> 01:10:01.931 Unbelievable. 01:10:02.182 --> 01:10:03.557 And kneel. 01:10:07.729 --> 01:10:09.563 Right. Here goes. 01:10:22.202 --> 01:10:24.870 - I can't hear anything. - I'm into ultrasonic. 01:10:26.290 --> 01:10:28.457 Johnny, will you just stop all this and face facts? 01:10:29.626 --> 01:10:33.087 We've failed. The only thing that can save us now is a miracle. 01:10:40.470 --> 01:10:41.554 It worked! 01:10:41.722 --> 01:10:42.805 Oh! 01:10:42.889 --> 01:10:43.931 Sir? 01:10:52.774 --> 01:10:55.651 I don't know why you hauled yourself up that dreadful poo tube, Bough, 01:10:55.736 --> 01:10:58.195 when there's a perfectly good ladder right beside it. 01:10:59.531 --> 01:11:02.033 Now, Sauvage may have fooled the country 01:11:02.117 --> 01:11:04.910 with his fake Archbishop and his secret agenda, 01:11:05.162 --> 01:11:06.996 but he hasn't fooled me. 01:11:08.248 --> 01:11:10.082 So, here's the plan. 01:12:41.591 --> 01:12:46.595 Sirs, you are hereby called to witness the anointing 01:12:46.680 --> 01:12:52.518 of your one true lord and future king, Pascal. 01:12:53.019 --> 01:12:57.064 Pascal, are you willing to take the oath? 01:12:57.691 --> 01:12:59.024 I am willing. 01:12:59.359 --> 01:13:05.865 Then be thou anointed with this holy oil. 01:13:08.452 --> 01:13:14.790 And do you, the chosen bishops of England, Scotland and Wales, 01:13:14.958 --> 01:13:17.460 assent to this anointing? 01:13:17.544 --> 01:13:20.004 For Scotland, I do. 01:13:20.088 --> 01:13:22.047 For Wales, I do. 01:13:22.883 --> 01:13:25.384 For England, I do not! 01:13:28.889 --> 01:13:29.889 English! 01:13:32.100 --> 01:13:35.352 That man must not be crowned King 01:13:35.437 --> 01:13:39.523 because he is a fraudster, a charlatan and a thief. 01:13:39.649 --> 01:13:42.902 No, please. Let him speak. 01:13:44.988 --> 01:13:48.491 It is this man, Pascal Sauvage, 01:13:48.575 --> 01:13:50.075 who stole the Crown Jewels, 01:13:51.244 --> 01:13:53.704 Who forced the Queen to abdicate 01:13:53.872 --> 01:13:56.582 and would kill anyone who got in his way. 01:13:57.125 --> 01:13:59.084 It is the end, Herr English. 01:14:01.421 --> 01:14:04.840 He has cheated, conned and manipulated 01:14:04.925 --> 01:14:07.134 this great country for his own ends. 01:14:08.220 --> 01:14:09.470 He's fooled you all! 01:14:12.015 --> 01:14:15.142 What's more, this whole ceremony is a sham 01:14:15.852 --> 01:14:19.438 because that man standing in front of you 01:14:19.606 --> 01:14:22.608 is not the Archbishop of Canterbury. 01:14:25.445 --> 01:14:28.948 English, a word of advice. Don't go there. 01:14:29.574 --> 01:14:32.993 Shut it, Frenchy. I'll go wherever I damn well please. 01:14:33.703 --> 01:14:37.122 - Now, take it off. - What? 01:14:37.415 --> 01:14:40.292 Your face is made of plastic. 01:14:42.462 --> 01:14:44.088 Remove it at once. 01:14:44.548 --> 01:14:46.757 I have no idea what you're talking about. 01:14:47.384 --> 01:14:50.302 Right. Well, I'll just have to remove it myself. 01:14:50.637 --> 01:14:51.971 - Come on! 01:14:55.725 --> 01:14:57.142 - Maybe it pulls up from the front. 01:14:58.478 --> 01:15:00.062 Come on, will you! 01:15:17.247 --> 01:15:18.497 Thank you very much. 01:15:20.917 --> 01:15:22.668 - Must be adjoined here somewhere. 01:15:22.836 --> 01:15:26.130 Fascinating performance as always, Mr English, 01:15:26.214 --> 01:15:28.507 but I'm afraid we must move on. 01:15:28.842 --> 01:15:33.262 Nobody's moving anywhere until I'm finished with this piece of low-life. 01:15:33.930 --> 01:15:36.140 Do you or do you not 01:15:36.224 --> 01:15:39.476 have tattooed on your bottom the words, 01:15:39.561 --> 01:15:42.605 "Jesus is coming. Look busy"? 01:15:44.816 --> 01:15:46.609 Are you insane? 01:15:46.943 --> 01:15:48.611 Well, let's find out, shall we? 01:15:49.070 --> 01:15:51.864 Go on, over. Go on, let's have a look. 01:16:01.041 --> 01:16:03.000 - Excellent! 01:16:12.636 --> 01:16:16.680 All right, so I was wrong about the Archbishop's bottom. 01:16:18.058 --> 01:16:21.268 - But there's more. - But not, I'm afraid, today. 01:16:21.353 --> 01:16:23.812 Sergeant, please take this man away. 01:16:24.230 --> 01:16:27.816 - But be gentle with him. - Do you think that's it? 01:16:28.276 --> 01:16:29.902 What, do you think I don't have more evidence? 01:16:30.236 --> 01:16:33.697 My loyal subordinate is standing by with a DVD 01:16:34.157 --> 01:16:37.284 which shows Sauvage's hideous plans for this country. 01:16:37.369 --> 01:16:39.828 Get him out! Get him out of here! 01:16:39.913 --> 01:16:43.290 - Play it, Bough! Play the disc! - Play it! Now! 01:16:59.766 --> 01:17:02.935 You're so hot, teasing me 01:17:03.436 --> 01:17:08.065 So you're blue But I can't take a chance on a chick like you 01:17:09.776 --> 01:17:11.777 It's somethin' I couldn't do 01:17:14.280 --> 01:17:16.365 Well, I could dance with you, honey If you think it's funny 01:17:18.243 --> 01:17:20.911 Does your mother know that you're out? 01:17:21.329 --> 01:17:24.790 And I could chat with you, baby Flirt a little, maybe 01:17:25.041 --> 01:17:27.543 Does your mother know that you're out? 01:17:28.378 --> 01:17:30.212 - Take it easy - Take it easy 01:17:30.296 --> 01:17:33.674 Better slow down, girl That's no way to go 01:17:33.800 --> 01:17:35.509 Does your mother know? 01:17:55.488 --> 01:17:57.156 Well, shall we? 01:18:03.329 --> 01:18:06.915 Then, as Solomon was anointed King 01:18:07.000 --> 01:18:11.336 by Zadok the priest and Nathan the prophet, 01:18:11.421 --> 01:18:17.092 so be thou anointed and consecrated King 01:18:18.845 --> 01:18:21.305 over all the peoples 01:18:21.639 --> 01:18:23.682 whom the Lord thy God 01:18:24.476 --> 01:18:26.852 hath given thee to govern. 01:18:27.729 --> 01:18:32.524 And of all your possessions, wherever they may be. 01:18:33.568 --> 01:18:37.029 And so, in the name of the Father 01:18:37.614 --> 01:18:39.114 and of the Son 01:18:39.699 --> 01:18:41.617 and of the Holy Ghost, 01:18:42.535 --> 01:18:44.828 I crown you... 01:18:50.418 --> 01:18:51.585 Damn it! 01:18:52.962 --> 01:18:54.880 - Give it back! - No! 01:18:54.964 --> 01:18:56.965 - That is my crown! - Never! 01:18:57.050 --> 01:19:00.511 - Give it back! - Never in a million years, Sauvage! 01:19:00.720 --> 01:19:02.554 - Give it to me! - Bugger off. 01:19:06.935 --> 01:19:08.560 Give it back! 01:19:10.980 --> 01:19:13.190 - Pascal! - Shut up! 01:19:15.068 --> 01:19:18.821 All this stupid little country have to do is stand in line 01:19:18.905 --> 01:19:22.950 and do what it's told for one miserable day! 01:19:23.034 --> 01:19:24.910 But can it do that? 01:19:25.411 --> 01:19:28.747 My fragrant French ass, it can! 01:19:33.586 --> 01:19:34.670 Merde! 01:19:37.590 --> 01:19:38.590 - Ah! 01:19:40.844 --> 01:19:43.929 Give it! The crown! The crown! Go! 01:19:44.472 --> 01:19:47.266 - Ah! 01:19:48.142 --> 01:19:50.853 And so, in the name of the Father 01:19:50.937 --> 01:19:53.939 and of the Son and of the Holy Ghost, 01:19:54.607 --> 01:19:56.316 I crown you... 01:20:00.113 --> 01:20:01.280 King. 01:20:03.324 --> 01:20:04.366 What? 01:20:30.727 --> 01:20:32.477 Arrest that man 01:20:33.813 --> 01:20:35.522 and lock him away. 01:20:40.987 --> 01:20:44.907 God save the king! Long live the king! 01:20:45.325 --> 01:20:47.326 God save the king! 01:21:23.321 --> 01:21:24.988 Words can hardly express 01:21:25.073 --> 01:21:27.783 just how much we appreciate everything you've done. 01:21:28.242 --> 01:21:30.202 Nothing more than my duty, ma'am. 01:21:30.745 --> 01:21:35.582 And in return, is there anything that your Queen and country can do for you? 01:21:36.876 --> 01:21:38.460 Well, 01:21:38.670 --> 01:21:41.213 since one is asking, ma'am... 01:21:42.507 --> 01:21:45.592 The headlines again. In celebration of her return to the throne, 01:21:45.677 --> 01:21:48.720 the Queen has declared August 5 a national holiday 01:21:48.888 --> 01:21:49.930 and in a private ceremony, 01:21:50.014 --> 01:21:53.475 has conferred a knighthood on the unnamed Ml7 agent 01:21:53.559 --> 01:21:57.270 responsible for foiling the plot of the French businessman Pascal Sauvage. 01:21:57.814 --> 01:22:00.315 Mr Sauvage is now awaiting trial for high treason, 01:22:00.400 --> 01:22:02.693 a crime which still carries the death penalty. 01:22:02.819 --> 01:22:06.738 If found guilty, he's asked that his brain be donated to medical science 01:22:06.823 --> 01:22:10.075 to further research into the causes of hypermanic schizophrenia. 01:22:10.910 --> 01:22:13.453 Meanwhile, the unnamed English agent has left the country 01:22:13.746 --> 01:22:16.915 and has already embarked on his next challenging mission. 01:22:23.089 --> 01:22:25.424 Sir Johnny English. 01:22:26.426 --> 01:22:28.593 Her Majesty did seem very grateful. 01:22:30.263 --> 01:22:31.596 She's not the only one. 01:22:40.273 --> 01:22:41.606 Mmm! 01:22:42.191 --> 01:22:43.859 You are full of surprises. 01:22:52.368 --> 01:22:55.454 - Johnny! - Oh... 01:22:56.289 --> 01:23:00.125 One eye on the shadows Protecting his fellows 01:23:00.460 --> 01:23:03.045 From sunup to the moon on his back 01:23:03.629 --> 01:23:07.799 Sendin' villains to Hades A hit with the ladies 01:23:08.009 --> 01:23:10.844 A stallion in the sack 01:23:11.971 --> 01:23:15.891 You can't get your life back when right follows left, jack 01:23:15.975 --> 01:23:18.477 The more you see, the less you know 01:23:19.562 --> 01:23:23.565 When others would leak it His service is secret 01:23:23.649 --> 01:23:26.568 Plays God when it's your time to go 01:23:26.652 --> 01:23:30.489 Hey, fellas Don't be jealous 01:23:30.990 --> 01:23:34.076 When they made him, they broke the mould 01:23:34.160 --> 01:23:38.163 So charismatic With an automatic 01:23:38.247 --> 01:23:41.833 Never prematurely shooting his load 01:23:43.669 --> 01:23:47.464 Queen and country safe and sound With villains six feet underground 01:23:47.548 --> 01:23:50.383 And no one knows 'cause no one's found any trace 01:23:50.468 --> 01:23:55.347 Of a man for all seasons Loves 'em and leaves 'em alone 01:23:55.973 --> 01:23:58.058 So alone 01:23:59.018 --> 01:24:03.063 And you and I wouldn't have a clue Who's doin' what, why, when and who 01:24:03.147 --> 01:24:04.940 Up a creek with no canoe 01:24:05.024 --> 01:24:08.235 Watch out for the man for all seasons 01:24:08.402 --> 01:24:11.113 Loves 'em and leaves 'em alone 01:24:11.447 --> 01:24:14.658 So alone But safe at home 01:24:14.784 --> 01:24:18.161 But safe at home But safe at home 01:24:22.542 --> 01:24:26.211 Queen and country safe and sound With villains six feet underground 01:24:26.295 --> 01:24:29.172 And no one knows 'cause no one's found any trace 01:24:29.257 --> 01:24:34.177 Of a man for all seasons Loves 'em and leaves 'em alone 01:24:34.846 --> 01:24:36.930 So alone 01:24:37.849 --> 01:24:41.810 And you and I wouldn't have a clue Who's doin' what, why, when and who 01:24:41.894 --> 01:24:43.645 Up a creek with no canoe 01:24:43.729 --> 01:24:46.982 Watch out for the man for all seasons 01:24:47.066 --> 01:24:50.110 Loves 'em and leaves 'em alone 01:24:50.194 --> 01:24:53.405 So alone But safe at home 01:24:53.573 --> 01:24:57.242 Queen and country safe and sound With villains six feet underground 01:24:57.326 --> 01:25:00.328 And no one knows 'cause no one's found any trace 01:25:00.413 --> 01:25:05.083 Of a man for all seasons Loves 'em and leaves 'em alone 01:25:05.835 --> 01:25:07.919 So alone 01:25:08.880 --> 01:25:12.841 And you and I wouldn't have a clue Who's doin' what, why, when and who 01:25:12.925 --> 01:25:14.676 Up a creek with no canoe 01:25:14.760 --> 01:25:18.054 Watch out for the man for all seasons 01:25:18.139 --> 01:25:21.016 Loves 'em and leaves 'em alone 01:25:21.100 --> 01:25:27.147 So alone But safe at home 01:25:27.231 --> 01:25:30.233 Oh, yeah 01:25:30.257 --> 01:25:50.257 Telegram Channel and Instagram Page .:: @bollbolljan_com ::.