﻿WEBVTT

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..:: Presented By ZarFilm Website ::..
.::  www.bolboljan.net ::.

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I always knew we
were a fairly odd family.

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First there was me.

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Too tall. Too skinny.
Too orange.

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My mum was lovely,
but not like other mums.

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There was
something solid about her.

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Something rectangular,
busy and unsentimental.

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Her fashion icon was the Queen.

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Dad, well, he was more normal. He always
seemed to have time on his hands.

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After giving up teaching university
students on his 50th birthday,

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he was eternally available
for a leisurely chat or

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to let me win at table tennis.

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Yes.

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And then there was Mum's
brother, Uncle Desmond.

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Always impeccably dressed. He
spent the days just, well,

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being Uncle Desmond.

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He was the most charming and least
clever man you could ever meet.

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His mind was on other things,
though we never found out what.

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And then,
finally there was Catherine.

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Katie. Kit Kat. My sister.

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In a household of sensible jackets
and haircuts there was this,

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well, what can I call her,
nature thing.

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With her elfin eyes, her purple
T-shirts and her eternally bare feet,

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she was then,
and still is to me,

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about the most wonderful
thing in the world.

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All in all, it was a pretty good childhood.
Full of repeated rhythms and patterns.

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By the time I was 21,
we were still

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having tea on the beach
every single day.

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Skimming stones and
eating sandwiches,

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summer and winter,
no matter what the weather.

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And every Friday evening,
a film,

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no matter what the weather.

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And then once a year, the
dreaded New Year's Eve party.

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Yeah, I might just get one.

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You're absolutely gorgeous.

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I'm Katie. What am I drinking?

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This is very expensive stuff.

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Cheers. Cheers.

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Come on, it's nearly midnight.

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We're all going through.
We're going through.

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Look, I've gotta find you a...

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God!

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Everyone makes little mistakes.
It's fine. Come on.

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6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.

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Happy New Year!

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Happy New Year.

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Sorry.

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And so I woke up
the next morning,

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hung-over, ashamed of myself,

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and not realising
it was the day

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that would change
my life forever.

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Get up, stupid.

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Dad wants you.

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Hello. Sexy pajamas.

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Tim, come in.

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Do

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sit down.

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That's very formal.

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Well, um, yeah.

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This is an odd moment for me

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because I had
the same moment with my

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father when I'd just
turned 21, and after it,

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my life was never the same, so I
approach it pretty, um, nervously.

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Okay.

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When you're ready.
It's all very mysterious.

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Right.

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Tim, my dear son, the...

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The simple fact is
the men in this family

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have always had
the ability to...

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This is going to sound strange,

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be prepared for strangeness.
Get ready for spooky time,

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but there's this family secret.

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And the secret is that
the men in the family can

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travel in time.

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Well, more accurately,
travel back in time.

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We can't travel
into the future.

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This is such a weird joke.

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It's seriously not a joke.

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So you're saying that you and
granddad, and his brothers

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could all travel back in time?
Absolutely.

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And you still do? Absolutely.

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Although it's not as dramatic as it sounds.
It's only in my own life.

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I can only go to places where I
actually was and can remember.

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I can't kill Hitler or shag
Helen of Troy, unfortunately.

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Okay, stop.

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Um...

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if it's true, which it isn't.
Although it is.

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Although it isn't, obviously. But if
it was, which it's not. Which it is.

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Which it isn't.
But if it was, how would I...

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The ?'How?' is
the easy bit, in fact.

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You go into a dark place,
big cupboards are

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very useful generally.
Toilets, at a pinch.

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Then you clench
your fists like this.

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Think of the moment
you're going to

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and you'll find yourself there.

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After a bit of a stumble
and a rumble and a tumble.

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Wow.

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Is as good a reaction as any.

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I think I plumped for ?'fuck!?'
but it was the '70s.

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No, this is
so obviously a joke.

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It's not a joke.

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Why would I lie to someone I'm

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fairly fond of?

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Okay.

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But, when I come
back downstairs

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after standing in a cupboard
with my fists clenched,

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you're gonna be
in so much trouble.

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Well,
let's see, shall we?

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And, Tim, try and
do something interesting.

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So much trouble.

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I mean it. Really.

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Right.

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Wow!

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You all right, Tim?

00:08:03.629 --> 00:08:05.881
Yes. Yeah. Good, ace. Yeah.

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Good, come on. it's nearly
midnight and we've got to find...

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Whoa, whoa, whoa!

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Whoo! Midnight.

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10, 9, 8, 7,

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6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.

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Happy New Year!

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Thank you, Tim.

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You're welcome, Polly.

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Does Mum know?

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Not a whistle.

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Strange. And what about the whole...
Butterfly effect thing. What can I say?

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We don't seem to have
messed up civilisation yet.

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Itís gonna be
a complicated year.

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Itís gonna be
a complicated life.

00:09:12.823 --> 00:09:15.450
What have you
done with it?

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For me,
it's books, books, books.

00:09:17.828 --> 00:09:19.955
I've read everything
a man could wish to.

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Twice. Dickens three times.
Any first thoughts?

00:09:25.461 --> 00:09:28.797
Well, I suppose apart from getting
a slightly better haircut... Yeah.

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Money would be
the obvious thing.

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Very mixed blessing.

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Utterly screwed up
your grandfather's life.

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Left him without
love or friends.

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I've never bumped into a
genuinely happy rich person.

00:09:37.932 --> 00:09:39.933
It would be nice
not to have to work.

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No, that's a real
recipe for disaster.

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Look what happened to Uncle Fred.
What happened to Uncle Fred?

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Absolutely sod all.

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Wasted his life.

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You have to use it for
things that you really think

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will make your life
the way you want it to be.

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Come on,
really think about this.

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Well,

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to be honest,
I suppose, at the moment,

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it would be just great if it
could help me get a girlfriend.

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Wow.

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Massive. Yeah.

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The mother ship.

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For me, it was always
gonna be about love.

00:10:16.220 --> 00:10:18.972
And that summer I walked
into the eye of the storm.

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Her name was Charlotte.
Cousin of Kit Kat's

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handsome but
nasty boyfriend Jimmy.

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And she was staying
for two whole months.

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Just one. Not both of them.

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Tim,

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will you do my back?

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Absolutely!

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Very keen!

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Whoa! No. No.

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No. No, no. No, no, no.

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Is it in my hair? Yes!

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Tim. Will you do my back?

00:11:12.276 --> 00:11:14.652
Sure. Just give us a sec.

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Okay.

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Thank you.

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Now...

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Ooh. Nice.

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Itís my area.

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it was a summer of
suntan and torture.

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I invited my foolish friend
Jay around for tennis

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because I thought
he'd make me look good.

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I was wrong!

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What are you doing? No.

00:12:10.292 --> 00:12:12.252
Charlotte just made both
of us look like idiots.

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Bad luck, Tim.

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How the hell are you meant
to concentrate on your game?

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How are you meant
to live your life

00:12:23.889 --> 00:12:26.015
with this sort of
shit going down?

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It never got better
until suddenly

00:12:30.855 --> 00:12:32.939
it was almost too late.

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Well, Charlotte,
our final lunch.

00:12:35.943 --> 00:12:37.193
No!

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And it's been really, really
lovely having you all summer.

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it has.

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Thank you.
Thank you.

00:12:43.284 --> 00:12:44.534
It really has.

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Hasn't it, Desmond?

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Beg your pardon?

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Lovely having
Charlotte here all summer.

00:12:49.874 --> 00:12:51.332
Charlotte? Who's Charlotte?

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Come on, darling. Charlotte,
sitting next to you.

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Yes, of course. Of course.
Charlotte. Hi.

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Lovely to meet you.

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Have you enjoyed having
Charlotte here all summer, Tim?

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Yeah.

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There goes August.

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I've introduced him to
most things, haven't I?

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You did. You were
much more sophisticated.

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In a quiet way,
I like to think.

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Come in.

00:13:38.422 --> 00:13:39.672
Charlotte. Yeah!

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As it's your last night,
can I ask you a question?

00:13:48.098 --> 00:13:49.849
Yeah. Ask away.

00:13:50.100 --> 00:13:51.518
No, wait.

00:13:52.853 --> 00:13:55.939
Itís not going to
be about love, is it?

00:13:56.106 --> 00:13:57.607
Love? What?

00:13:57.733 --> 00:14:01.277
Well, it's just that Kit Kat warned me that
if you were to ever mention it, I should be

00:14:01.403 --> 00:14:03.571
very firm with you and tell you

00:14:03.697 --> 00:14:05.865
you must treat me
like your sister

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and not be stupid.

00:14:08.285 --> 00:14:11.287
Or have I just made
a total fool of myself

00:14:11.413 --> 00:14:13.014
and you were actually
going to ask me for

00:14:13.123 --> 00:14:14.707
late night last
minute tennis tips?

00:14:15.543 --> 00:14:17.377
No, it was the love thing.

00:14:17.461 --> 00:14:19.128
Well.

00:14:20.297 --> 00:14:22.590
That's very sweet of you.

00:14:23.425 --> 00:14:26.719
Itís just a shame you
left it till the last night.

00:14:26.804 --> 00:14:31.641
You should have tried creeping along
the corridor while we still had time.

00:14:32.560 --> 00:14:34.811
Okay, the ?'last night?'
was a bad idea?

00:14:34.979 --> 00:14:39.816
Very bad idea. it feels like an ever
so slightly insulting afterthought.

00:14:40.276 --> 00:14:42.485
?'Last night?' was
never going to work.

00:14:43.153 --> 00:14:46.155
All right. Good. I've got it.

00:15:06.594 --> 00:15:07.927
Come in.

00:15:09.346 --> 00:15:11.264
Tim. Hi. Charlotte.

00:15:12.641 --> 00:15:14.350
Hi. Sit down.

00:15:16.812 --> 00:15:19.689
I know you've
probably suspected this,

00:15:19.857 --> 00:15:23.443
but over the last month I've fallen
completely in love with you.

00:15:25.195 --> 00:15:27.864
Now obviously
this was gonna happen

00:15:28.115 --> 00:15:32.118
because you're
a goddess with that face

00:15:32.202 --> 00:15:33.995
and that hair,

00:15:34.288 --> 00:15:37.290
but even if you
didn't have a nice face,

00:15:38.292 --> 00:15:40.960
and even if you had
absolutely no hair

00:15:41.211 --> 00:15:43.796
because of some
bizarre medical reason,

00:15:45.215 --> 00:15:47.175
I'd still adore you,

00:15:47.718 --> 00:15:48.718
and I...

00:15:49.219 --> 00:15:53.890
I just wondered whether, by any
chance, you might share my feelings.

00:15:55.225 --> 00:15:56.225
Wow.

00:15:57.561 --> 00:15:59.437
I tell you what.

00:15:59.980 --> 00:16:02.065
Why don't we see
how the summer goes

00:16:02.149 --> 00:16:05.985
and then you ask me
again on my last night?

00:16:07.863 --> 00:16:09.656
Your last night? Yes.

00:16:10.032 --> 00:16:14.035
Try me on the last night. See
what happens then, shall we?

00:16:14.995 --> 00:16:16.245
Itís exciting.

00:16:16.664 --> 00:16:17.664
Right.

00:16:18.248 --> 00:16:22.460
No, it's a perfect plan. That's
absolutely perfect. Last night.

00:16:22.586 --> 00:16:24.003
Last night.

00:16:26.882 --> 00:16:28.466
Thanks very much.

00:16:29.635 --> 00:16:31.135
Night-night, Timmy.

00:16:38.519 --> 00:16:40.436
Big lesson number one,

00:16:40.562 --> 00:16:43.731
all the time travel in the world
can't make someone love you.

00:16:43.857 --> 00:16:44.857
Bye!

00:16:46.068 --> 00:16:48.277
So the love of my life
just drove away.

00:16:49.780 --> 00:16:53.533
And the very next day
it was my turn to leave.

00:16:56.286 --> 00:16:59.288
There you go. Don't
spend it all at once.

00:17:00.999 --> 00:17:01.999
Thanks.

00:17:03.502 --> 00:17:07.422
Don't call too often, your mother
doesn't like to be disturbed.

00:17:07.548 --> 00:17:09.716
Okay. Thanks.

00:17:28.110 --> 00:17:32.488
I caught the train to London in
search of a future and a girlfriend.

00:17:35.159 --> 00:17:37.410
I was staying in St John's
Wood, near Abbey Road,

00:17:37.494 --> 00:17:40.663
with a playwright friend
of my dad's called Harry.

00:17:40.956 --> 00:17:44.709
It's always nice to have family connections
when you're a new kid in town.

00:17:57.639 --> 00:18:01.392
What the fuck do you want?

00:18:03.604 --> 00:18:04.729
I'm James's son.

00:18:04.855 --> 00:18:06.022
Who?

00:18:07.232 --> 00:18:09.358
James Lake. What about him?

00:18:12.029 --> 00:18:13.780
He said you had a room.

00:18:15.199 --> 00:18:17.617
Go in there and wait.

00:18:18.619 --> 00:18:21.954
Quietly. I mean it,
don't make a sound.

00:18:22.873 --> 00:18:24.457
Or I'll kill you.

00:18:35.052 --> 00:18:37.595
I was actually having the first
good idea I've had for a decade

00:18:37.679 --> 00:18:39.222
when you rang on the doorbell.

00:18:39.890 --> 00:18:41.641
But now it's gone.

00:18:42.434 --> 00:18:44.393
You little shit.

00:18:44.520 --> 00:18:46.103
How's your dad?

00:18:46.396 --> 00:18:50.483
Weird cock, I always thought.
Something weird about him.

00:18:50.609 --> 00:18:51.400
Really?

00:18:51.485 --> 00:18:53.986
Yeah, I never really
liked him, actually.

00:18:55.030 --> 00:18:57.532
Your mum still
look like Andy Warhol?

00:18:57.658 --> 00:18:58.658
What?

00:19:00.035 --> 00:19:02.620
That, by the way, is my wife.

00:19:02.788 --> 00:19:04.247
Nice.

00:19:04.373 --> 00:19:05.813
Yeah, you wouldn't
like her at first.

00:19:07.084 --> 00:19:09.001
Sarcastic cow.

00:19:10.128 --> 00:19:12.296
But eventually
you'd realise that

00:19:12.798 --> 00:19:15.466
she's the best human
being in the world.

00:19:16.218 --> 00:19:18.469
Which is why she
left me, of course.

00:19:21.014 --> 00:19:22.598
Here you go.

00:19:23.225 --> 00:19:26.978
Try not to make too much noise,
particularly when having sex.

00:19:27.604 --> 00:19:28.646
No chance of that.

00:19:28.730 --> 00:19:31.440
Christ,
two losers in one house.

00:19:31.984 --> 00:19:33.526
That is my daughter.

00:19:35.153 --> 00:19:38.823
Have sex with her if you like.
Apparently everyone else has.

00:19:41.118 --> 00:19:43.578
It wasn't a hopeful
set-up for romance.

00:19:44.329 --> 00:19:46.998
And work didn't help
on that score either.

00:19:47.416 --> 00:19:50.126
The world of law seems to
be entirely full of men.

00:19:52.337 --> 00:19:56.674
Hello. I'm Rory. Very pleased to meet you.
A real thrill.

00:19:57.134 --> 00:20:00.761
Well, who knows, we might become,
you know, pals, et cetera.

00:20:02.139 --> 00:20:03.848
Who the hell are you? Tim Lake.

00:20:04.266 --> 00:20:06.100
Well, I hope you're
better than this clown.

00:20:06.768 --> 00:20:08.269
Come on, Roger.

00:20:08.395 --> 00:20:09.896
Itís Rory, actually.

00:20:10.022 --> 00:20:11.564
I've been here
a year and a half.

00:20:11.648 --> 00:20:14.233
I'm just saying that to be nice.
It's two years actually.

00:20:16.320 --> 00:20:20.907
So six lonely months went by
and it was still just me and Harry.

00:20:21.033 --> 00:20:23.534
Me lawyer-ing every hour
of the day and night.

00:20:23.660 --> 00:20:26.913
And him putting the finishing
touches to his new play.

00:20:28.916 --> 00:20:31.542
No matter how many girls
there were in the world,

00:20:31.668 --> 00:20:34.795
I always seemed to
end up with Rory.

00:20:34.922 --> 00:20:35.922
Hello.

00:20:36.298 --> 00:20:38.090
Until, out of the blue,

00:20:38.550 --> 00:20:43.471
on a dodgy night out with dodgy
Jay, something miraculous happened.

00:20:44.139 --> 00:20:45.973
The waiters are,

00:20:46.350 --> 00:20:48.059
wait for this,
right, they're blind.

00:20:48.143 --> 00:20:49.268
You're kidding me?

00:20:49.394 --> 00:20:52.897
I'm kidding you not.
No, as bats. As bats!

00:20:53.357 --> 00:20:54.982
Very good to
have you here, gentlemen.

00:20:55.067 --> 00:20:56.984
I hope you enjoy
your experience.

00:20:57.069 --> 00:20:59.195
Carlo will show
you to your table.

00:20:59.321 --> 00:21:01.572
Great. Lead on, maestro.

00:21:01.698 --> 00:21:04.283
Can I have your right hand on
my right shoulder, please?

00:21:04.368 --> 00:21:06.786
And your friend hold on to your shoulder.
Thank you.

00:21:10.415 --> 00:21:13.918
Mind the stairs and
be prepared because

00:21:14.169 --> 00:21:16.420
it's completely dark.

00:21:18.382 --> 00:21:20.091
Okay, gentlemen,
if you don't mind,

00:21:20.175 --> 00:21:22.551
I can sit you here beside
these two young ladies.

00:21:22.636 --> 00:21:24.720
No, no.
Sounds absolutely perfect!

00:21:24.846 --> 00:21:27.014
God,
you sound very perky.

00:21:27.099 --> 00:21:28.474
I am. And very handsome.

00:21:29.643 --> 00:21:31.227
Someone's there.

00:21:31.353 --> 00:21:33.521
Hi. Hi. I'm Mary.

00:21:33.647 --> 00:21:36.315
I'm Tim. Mary's my
mother's name, actually.

00:21:36.441 --> 00:21:39.026
Does it suit her? Sort of.

00:21:39.152 --> 00:21:42.613
Although she's sturdy, so Bernard
might have been a better fit.

00:21:44.032 --> 00:21:45.032
Okay.

00:21:45.409 --> 00:21:48.119
Something just
touched my elbow.

00:21:48.245 --> 00:21:49.578
Okay, that wasn't me.

00:21:49.663 --> 00:21:53.082
No. Well, that just makes it worse.
If it wasn't you, who was it?

00:21:53.208 --> 00:21:56.419
it wasn't me because I'm
touching something else.

00:21:56.545 --> 00:21:59.171
Yes, and you'll stop
that right away, thank you.

00:21:59.548 --> 00:22:04.135
So, girls, be honest,
who is more beautiful?

00:22:04.219 --> 00:22:05.761
- I am.
- Yeah. She is.

00:22:05.887 --> 00:22:07.013
Excellent!

00:22:07.139 --> 00:22:08.681
Actually,
I look like Kate Moss.

00:22:08.807 --> 00:22:10.349
Really?

00:22:10.475 --> 00:22:13.310
No. I sort of
look like a squirrel.

00:22:14.688 --> 00:22:16.022
Do you like Kate Moss?

00:22:16.148 --> 00:22:17.523
I absolutely love her.

00:22:17.649 --> 00:22:20.818
In fact, I almost wore one of
her dresses here tonight. You?

00:22:20.944 --> 00:22:23.154
No, no, her clothes
look terrible on me.

00:22:25.657 --> 00:22:28.034
I cannot believe that it's
your birthday next week as well.

00:22:28.118 --> 00:22:32.163
Your friend Jay is
quite enthusiastic.

00:22:32.456 --> 00:22:34.582
I actually hate him.

00:22:34.708 --> 00:22:35.624
What's Joanna like?

00:22:35.751 --> 00:22:38.502
- She's basically a prostitute.
- Yeah.

00:22:39.254 --> 00:22:41.172
I think it's strawberry mousse.
Ooh!

00:22:41.256 --> 00:22:42.381
Do you want some?

00:22:42.466 --> 00:22:43.799
Um... Okay. I'll try it.

00:22:43.884 --> 00:22:45.092
Okay, where's your mouth?

00:22:45.177 --> 00:22:46.802
Itís...

00:22:47.679 --> 00:22:49.055
it's here.

00:22:49.181 --> 00:22:50.514
Okay. There?

00:22:50.682 --> 00:22:52.475
My God, what was that?

00:22:52.601 --> 00:22:54.393
That's my eye.

00:22:54.519 --> 00:22:57.396
I think there's a lot of...
I've got quite a lot of

00:22:57.481 --> 00:22:59.523
strawberry mousse
in my eye now!

00:22:59.649 --> 00:23:00.941
I'm so sorry.

00:23:01.026 --> 00:23:04.278
No. Thank you. That's
a new sensation for me.

00:23:06.823 --> 00:23:10.409
So, maybe I'll see
you outside or...

00:23:10.744 --> 00:23:12.411
Yeah. Yeah, great.

00:23:12.537 --> 00:23:14.330
Great. Scary.

00:23:14.456 --> 00:23:16.707
Yeah, it's a bit scary.

00:23:17.000 --> 00:23:20.169
My God, I'm so in there.
What about you?

00:23:20.295 --> 00:23:23.005
I don't know,
but she sounded wonderful.

00:23:23.090 --> 00:23:24.298
Shh!

00:23:25.509 --> 00:23:27.218
Joanna? Jay.

00:23:27.344 --> 00:23:29.428
Christ, you're a babe.

00:23:29.554 --> 00:23:31.180
How do you fancy
stretching the night

00:23:31.306 --> 00:23:32.890
out a bit?
I can ditch the loser.

00:23:33.016 --> 00:23:35.935
We've got to rush, but help me find a
cab and I might give you my number.

00:23:36.019 --> 00:23:37.019
Of course. Yeah.

00:23:37.104 --> 00:23:38.817
Or I might not.
Haven't decided yet. So...

00:23:38.855 --> 00:23:40.356
I have. it's not gonna happen.

00:24:07.884 --> 00:24:09.635
Hi. Hi.

00:24:10.929 --> 00:24:13.305
Where's... She
and Jay just...

00:24:13.431 --> 00:24:16.058
She took him to...
I don't know.

00:24:16.184 --> 00:24:17.184
Right.

00:24:17.352 --> 00:24:19.520
Well, I guess I'd better...

00:24:19.646 --> 00:24:23.315
Would it be very wrong if I
asked you for your number?

00:24:25.318 --> 00:24:26.318
No.

00:24:26.653 --> 00:24:29.697
Just in case I ever
had to call you about...

00:24:30.323 --> 00:24:31.866
Stuff? -

00:24:32.617 --> 00:24:33.617
Okay.

00:24:37.831 --> 00:24:39.165
Would you...

00:24:39.875 --> 00:24:41.083
it's Mary.

00:24:41.251 --> 00:24:42.459
Mary.

00:24:44.629 --> 00:24:45.880
Okay.

00:24:46.506 --> 00:24:48.674
I thought this phone
was old and shit,

00:24:49.384 --> 00:24:51.594
but suddenly it's my most
valuable possession.

00:24:52.637 --> 00:24:54.430
You really like me?

00:24:56.099 --> 00:24:58.684
Even my frock?

00:24:58.810 --> 00:25:00.936
I love your frock.

00:25:01.563 --> 00:25:05.149
And my hair?
It's not too brown?

00:25:05.483 --> 00:25:07.026
I love brown.

00:25:08.737 --> 00:25:10.029
My fringe is new.

00:25:10.113 --> 00:25:12.323
The fringe is perfect.
Fringe is the best bit.

00:25:12.407 --> 00:25:13.532
Mary!

00:25:13.658 --> 00:25:16.994
We have to go! I found a cab and his
dodgy friend is about to assault me.

00:25:17.120 --> 00:25:19.455
Okay, I'm coming.

00:25:19.581 --> 00:25:21.165
Two seconds.

00:25:22.125 --> 00:25:23.959
I hope I see you again.

00:25:24.586 --> 00:25:25.711
You will.

00:25:26.254 --> 00:25:28.589
Okay. Good.

00:25:30.175 --> 00:25:33.552
Goodnight.

00:26:10.966 --> 00:26:12.549
What's happened?

00:26:12.801 --> 00:26:14.885
What have you done,
you poor thing?

00:26:15.178 --> 00:26:18.097
Nothing.
It's just a flesh wound.

00:26:18.223 --> 00:26:19.515
Here. Thank you.

00:26:23.144 --> 00:26:25.312
You may remember,
my play opened tonight.

00:26:25.897 --> 00:26:27.481
My God, yes. How did it go?

00:26:27.607 --> 00:26:29.149
Well. it went well.

00:26:29.526 --> 00:26:33.070
You could tell in the room a
masterpiece was being unfurled.

00:26:33.196 --> 00:26:35.197
Really? Really.

00:26:35.323 --> 00:26:38.867
Until, and this is the
crucial plot point, I think,

00:26:38.994 --> 00:26:43.747
until the lead actor had the most
massive dry in the history of theatre.

00:26:43.873 --> 00:26:45.416
No, no, no. Yes, yes, yes.

00:26:46.876 --> 00:26:48.460
He didn't just
forget his lines.

00:26:48.586 --> 00:26:50.129
He forgot his lines
to the extent

00:26:50.213 --> 00:26:52.631
that no actor has ever
forgotten their lines

00:26:52.757 --> 00:26:55.134
before in
the annals of dramatic art.

00:26:55.677 --> 00:26:59.054
The reviews won't say,?'Major masterpiece
gets unveiled, ?'

00:26:59.139 --> 00:27:02.808
they'll say, ?'Major
actor gets Alzheimer's.?'

00:27:03.476 --> 00:27:04.977
it's a disaster.

00:27:05.895 --> 00:27:07.604
Is an understatement.

00:27:08.440 --> 00:27:13.068
Itís the Titanic of play
openings, but with no survivors.

00:27:13.737 --> 00:27:16.071
No women, no children,

00:27:16.489 --> 00:27:18.741
not even Kate Winslet.

00:27:19.200 --> 00:27:20.868
All dead.

00:27:22.537 --> 00:27:24.163
Okay. I'll see what I can do.

00:27:24.247 --> 00:27:25.622
What does that mean?

00:27:26.416 --> 00:27:28.375
What are you gonna do?
Ring up every critic

00:27:28.501 --> 00:27:30.419
in London and
offer them a blow job

00:27:30.545 --> 00:27:35.257
if they ignore the fact that we sat
in total silence for half an hour

00:27:35.383 --> 00:27:40.471
waiting for a moron to
remember one single line?

00:27:40.597 --> 00:27:42.348
Not quite that.

00:27:58.990 --> 00:27:59.990
Hello.

00:28:03.620 --> 00:28:08.791
Hello, Sir Tom. I'm a friend of Harry's.
How's it going with the lines?

00:28:10.126 --> 00:28:12.378
I'm sorry,
what do you mean ?'the lines?'?

00:28:13.129 --> 00:28:14.797
Itís just, you know,
in the court scenes,

00:28:14.881 --> 00:28:17.591
some of those lines
are pretty complex.

00:28:17.717 --> 00:28:20.094
And I just thought maybe it
might be worth, you know,

00:28:20.720 --> 00:28:22.179
having one last
look at the lines

00:28:22.263 --> 00:28:25.641
before you go on.
A little refresher.

00:28:26.893 --> 00:28:29.144
Fuck off out of here.

00:28:29.270 --> 00:28:34.024
You arising lunatic. Get out!
You ginger twerp. Go on!

00:28:34.150 --> 00:28:35.901
Patronising piece of...

00:28:47.997 --> 00:28:50.416
And now the Defense.

00:29:00.802 --> 00:29:05.472
I have lived
many weary years...

00:29:05.765 --> 00:29:07.808
it's brilliant... but never,

00:29:07.934 --> 00:29:11.979
in that long catalogue
of wasted time,

00:29:12.647 --> 00:29:17.109
have I ever seen such an atrocious
miscarriage of justice.

00:29:22.323 --> 00:29:26.660
Do the Prosecution have
anything final to add?

00:30:11.080 --> 00:30:13.332
Sorry, excuse me. Sorry.

00:30:20.673 --> 00:30:25.260
Do the Prosecution have
anything final to add?

00:30:32.352 --> 00:30:33.435
Psst!

00:30:40.860 --> 00:30:41.902
Gentlemen...

00:30:44.280 --> 00:30:45.280
Gentlemen,

00:30:45.823 --> 00:30:50.327
I regard today's proceedings
with the utmost gravity.

00:30:50.453 --> 00:30:52.204
Nevertheless,

00:30:52.789 --> 00:30:55.666
let us be clear of one

00:30:57.544 --> 00:31:00.379
simple and salient thing.

00:31:03.383 --> 00:31:05.133
It is the life

00:31:05.718 --> 00:31:07.678
of a guilty man!

00:31:18.982 --> 00:31:22.568
One of the actors appeared
to have actually fallen asleep...

00:31:22.652 --> 00:31:26.113
Here's the little prick who
walked out halfway through.

00:31:26.197 --> 00:31:28.115
You missed the best scene,
you little twerp.

00:31:28.241 --> 00:31:29.241
Sorry.

00:31:29.659 --> 00:31:31.827
What did you think of the set?

00:31:32.161 --> 00:31:33.370
I thought it was incredible.

00:31:33.454 --> 00:31:36.582
Did you? I didn't. Too brown.

00:31:39.919 --> 00:31:41.086
Mary!

00:31:43.131 --> 00:31:44.798
No.

00:31:45.633 --> 00:31:47.175
She's gone.

00:32:02.358 --> 00:32:06.361
Two girls in earlier tonight. One of
them the prettiest girl in the world.

00:32:06.487 --> 00:32:08.388
The other one like a
sort of nice prostitute.

00:32:08.426 --> 00:32:10.365
Did you get their names?

00:32:10.491 --> 00:32:14.286
Yes. They left
a while ago. Let's see.

00:32:15.330 --> 00:32:17.789
No, I'm afraid
they were walk-ins

00:32:17.915 --> 00:32:20.375
and it appears
they paid by cash.

00:32:20.793 --> 00:32:22.502
Sorry, sir.

00:32:22.629 --> 00:32:24.389
That's okay.
That's fine, it's brilliant.

00:32:24.714 --> 00:32:27.841
Itís just the end of my life.
Thanks so much.

00:32:49.072 --> 00:32:51.073
Cheer up, mate.

00:32:51.407 --> 00:32:55.243
Apparently, you're living with
Britain's greatest living playwright.

00:32:55.578 --> 00:32:57.079
I don't usually
read them, obviously,

00:32:57.246 --> 00:32:58.747
but I couldn't resist this one.

00:32:58.915 --> 00:33:03.919
?'Harry Chapman
found guilty of genius.?'

00:33:10.843 --> 00:33:12.135
I have to go out. Right now.

00:33:12.261 --> 00:33:13.595
Why?

00:33:13.721 --> 00:33:15.514
She loves Kate Moss.

00:33:59.142 --> 00:34:00.976
Thanks for keeping
me company, Kittle.

00:34:01.144 --> 00:34:02.769
Nothing better to do.

00:34:02.895 --> 00:34:03.979
How's Jimmy?

00:34:04.147 --> 00:34:05.147
Dumped me.

00:34:05.273 --> 00:34:06.273
Not again.

00:34:06.399 --> 00:34:08.108
And work? They've sacked me.

00:34:08.234 --> 00:34:09.234
Idiots.

00:34:09.777 --> 00:34:11.486
Coffee? Please.

00:34:12.155 --> 00:34:15.449
I've only just noticed this cat
in this picture. See that cat?

00:34:15.575 --> 00:34:18.452
I do see that cat.
It's very good.

00:34:19.495 --> 00:34:20.996
My God.

00:34:21.956 --> 00:34:23.081
My God!

00:34:23.207 --> 00:34:24.332
What?

00:34:24.959 --> 00:34:26.334
it's her.

00:34:28.087 --> 00:34:29.671
Itís her!

00:34:30.757 --> 00:34:32.257
That's her!

00:34:33.342 --> 00:34:34.760
Shh!

00:34:38.014 --> 00:34:39.598
You go, girl.

00:34:51.360 --> 00:34:52.360
Sorry.

00:34:53.529 --> 00:34:55.322
Hi. Hi.

00:34:57.492 --> 00:34:58.867
How are you?

00:34:59.619 --> 00:35:01.703
I'm... I'm fine.

00:35:02.038 --> 00:35:04.206
Itís so good to see you.

00:35:04.373 --> 00:35:06.541
Um... We've never met before.

00:35:07.877 --> 00:35:09.836
No, fuck.

00:35:10.463 --> 00:35:12.506
No, of course we haven't. No.

00:35:12.632 --> 00:35:15.675
Sorry, I think you've
mistaken me for someone else.

00:35:15.802 --> 00:35:17.469
No, no, no.

00:35:18.137 --> 00:35:19.805
Your name's Mary.

00:35:21.057 --> 00:35:23.850
That's distinctly weird.

00:35:23.976 --> 00:35:25.852
How do you know that?

00:35:26.854 --> 00:35:28.730
Well, you look like a Mary.

00:35:29.232 --> 00:35:30.524
In what way?

00:35:30.650 --> 00:35:31.900
My mum's called Mary.

00:35:32.068 --> 00:35:33.527
I look like your mother?

00:35:34.070 --> 00:35:36.196
No. You're much prettier.

00:35:39.408 --> 00:35:40.826
Itís a nice fringe, by the way.

00:35:40.952 --> 00:35:42.369
God, it's new and

00:35:42.495 --> 00:35:44.412
probably too short but... No.

00:35:44.580 --> 00:35:47.415
Well, gee, thank you and

00:35:47.583 --> 00:35:49.918
listen, it was
really nice to meet you.

00:35:50.086 --> 00:35:53.672
I should probably go because
my friend's waiting for me

00:35:53.756 --> 00:35:56.174
and you're a,
you're a total stranger.

00:35:56.425 --> 00:35:57.843
Total stranger.

00:35:57.969 --> 00:35:59.344
Yeah, it's crazy stuff.

00:35:59.428 --> 00:36:01.263
Yeah, kind of. Okay.

00:36:01.389 --> 00:36:02.764
Bye, Mary. Bye.

00:36:06.060 --> 00:36:07.018
No.

00:36:07.103 --> 00:36:08.270
How did it go?

00:36:08.396 --> 00:36:09.521
It was very poor.

00:36:09.605 --> 00:36:10.939
Very poor indeed, yeah.

00:36:11.107 --> 00:36:12.440
You gotta go again.

00:36:13.359 --> 00:36:15.277
You can do it. Take two.

00:36:18.698 --> 00:36:22.033
She just always... She
always looks different.

00:36:23.786 --> 00:36:26.121
Sorry. it's me again.

00:36:26.622 --> 00:36:28.248
Hi. Sorry.

00:36:28.958 --> 00:36:30.750
Joanna, this is...

00:36:31.210 --> 00:36:32.419
Tim.

00:36:32.545 --> 00:36:33.712
Hello. Nice to meet you.

00:36:36.299 --> 00:36:39.968
Tim is a total stranger whose
mother's name is Mary.

00:36:40.094 --> 00:36:42.804
I just had a weird
experience with Mary here

00:36:42.889 --> 00:36:45.432
of thinking she was someone else.
But she wasn't.

00:36:45.558 --> 00:36:49.769
But I just wondered if I
could walk round with you

00:36:50.730 --> 00:36:54.649
for a while because my sister
Kit Kat is about to leave...

00:36:54.775 --> 00:36:55.775
Yeah.

00:36:58.404 --> 00:37:00.071
Bye... and...

00:37:00.406 --> 00:37:01.823
And so,

00:37:02.742 --> 00:37:04.993
I'm about to be quite lonely.

00:37:05.661 --> 00:37:09.956
Right. Well, I think we
should probably say no.

00:37:10.082 --> 00:37:13.168
No, yes. But on the other hand,
he's got a quite nice smile

00:37:13.294 --> 00:37:15.337
and sort of,
you know, fun hair.

00:37:17.089 --> 00:37:18.089
Yeah.

00:37:19.133 --> 00:37:20.508
All right.

00:37:21.010 --> 00:37:25.013
But you have to promise that you are
not one of the following things.

00:37:25.181 --> 00:37:26.806
One, a lunatic.

00:37:26.891 --> 00:37:28.016
Yeah. No.

00:37:28.184 --> 00:37:30.977
Two, a fringe fetishist.

00:37:31.312 --> 00:37:34.314
I'm just Kate Moss's
number one male fan.

00:37:36.108 --> 00:37:37.651
God. Really?

00:37:37.777 --> 00:37:39.110
Yeah. God, yeah.

00:37:39.195 --> 00:37:42.530
Do you agree that the magic
of her lies in her history?

00:37:43.115 --> 00:37:45.325
That the informality
of her early shots

00:37:45.409 --> 00:37:48.453
compared to this stuff
so you just always know

00:37:48.537 --> 00:37:50.914
that, despite the high
fashion, she's still just

00:37:50.998 --> 00:37:54.626
that cheeky normal
naked girl on the beach?

00:37:55.711 --> 00:37:57.253
Couldn't have put
it better myself.

00:37:57.338 --> 00:38:01.049
That's absolutely it.
I agree with that profoundly.

00:38:02.385 --> 00:38:03.426
Milk?

00:38:03.552 --> 00:38:04.552
Yes.

00:38:04.720 --> 00:38:06.638
Sugar? No.

00:38:06.722 --> 00:38:07.764
Boyfriend?

00:38:07.890 --> 00:38:08.974
Yes!

00:38:09.141 --> 00:38:11.309
No. No, you don't
have a boyfriend.

00:38:12.561 --> 00:38:14.896
Do I not look like
I'd have a boyfriend?

00:38:15.022 --> 00:38:16.918
Do I look like I'd never
get a boyfriend? No.

00:38:16.957 --> 00:38:18.604
That's the rudest thing
I've ever heard.

00:38:18.651 --> 00:38:21.486
I didn't mean it like that.
I just didn't expect...

00:38:22.655 --> 00:38:24.739
Is it quite a new boyfriend?

00:38:24.907 --> 00:38:25.907
Yes.

00:38:26.409 --> 00:38:28.410
There he is. Rupert.

00:38:29.370 --> 00:38:31.246
Yes. He's so cute. Rupert?

00:38:31.372 --> 00:38:32.706
Hi, guys.

00:38:33.082 --> 00:38:34.916
Sorry I'm late, with my dad.

00:38:36.252 --> 00:38:37.252
Hi, Rupee.

00:38:38.546 --> 00:38:39.546
?'Rupee?'?

00:38:41.090 --> 00:38:43.258
Well, this is Tim and

00:38:43.384 --> 00:38:45.260
we don't know him at all.

00:38:45.928 --> 00:38:48.555
Hey, I was thinking we could
take in a film after this.

00:38:48.681 --> 00:38:50.306
Get some mixed popcorn,
share a Coke,

00:38:50.433 --> 00:38:51.558
snuggle. Okay.

00:38:51.934 --> 00:38:52.934
Okay.

00:38:54.270 --> 00:38:56.730
When did you two meet? Exactly?

00:38:57.273 --> 00:38:59.274
Well, it was only
a week ago, actually.

00:39:00.067 --> 00:39:02.902
Itís all been a bit of a
whirlwind, hasn't it, poochy face?

00:39:03.279 --> 00:39:06.281
I'm gonna have to teach you what you
can and can't say in front of people.

00:39:06.449 --> 00:39:07.866
No ?'poochy face?'? No.

00:39:07.950 --> 00:39:09.951
No. Definitely not.

00:39:10.119 --> 00:39:14.122
Come on, then. More details about
this wonderful first meeting?

00:39:14.248 --> 00:39:15.290
Okay, okay.

00:39:15.458 --> 00:39:17.584
It was, um, what... Joanna?

00:39:18.127 --> 00:39:19.627
June 17th.

00:39:19.795 --> 00:39:21.296
And Jo was
having a little party.

00:39:22.131 --> 00:39:25.300
A living hell from which
Rupert, thank God, rescued me.

00:39:25.426 --> 00:39:27.594
And where was
this terrible party?

00:39:27.720 --> 00:39:29.804
My brothel of a flat.

00:39:29.930 --> 00:39:32.110
Which is where, though? That's
the question, isn't it.

00:39:32.149 --> 00:39:33.279
What are you, a detective?

00:39:33.759 --> 00:39:35.794
No, sorry, I've just got
a very visual imagination.

00:39:35.978 --> 00:39:37.896
I like to imagine
stuff completely.

00:39:39.065 --> 00:39:43.234
26 Court field Gardens,
SW5. Around 8:30.

00:39:43.903 --> 00:39:45.987
Dress code, slutty.
Will that do?

00:39:46.155 --> 00:39:47.906
Absolutely, yes.
Although I am wondering

00:39:47.990 --> 00:39:51.076
when you got there, Rupert.
Early, late?

00:39:51.494 --> 00:39:54.662
On time, I think.
True love was calling.

00:39:54.789 --> 00:39:56.456
God.

00:39:56.749 --> 00:39:59.000
I actually feel a bit
sick now. Just these

00:39:59.168 --> 00:40:01.419
muffins, I think.
Never trust a blueberry.

00:40:02.838 --> 00:40:04.422
Okay, I'll be back in a tick.

00:40:05.841 --> 00:40:07.801
You two are such
a lovely couple.

00:40:12.181 --> 00:40:13.348
Bit weird.

00:40:13.474 --> 00:40:14.641
He's cute.

00:40:14.767 --> 00:40:15.767
I like him.

00:40:15.893 --> 00:40:16.935
Yeah, me too.

00:40:48.175 --> 00:40:50.218
Hello. Do I know you?

00:40:50.386 --> 00:40:53.847
No, no, no.
I'm a friend of Mary's.

00:40:54.390 --> 00:40:57.976
She has another friend? Gosh,
you amaze me. But hooray.

00:40:58.060 --> 00:40:59.811
Ooh. Hotdog?

00:41:00.229 --> 00:41:01.604
Took me hours.
Made them myself.

00:41:01.730 --> 00:41:03.064
Thanks.

00:41:04.692 --> 00:41:07.235
Disgusting.
Totally undercooked.

00:41:07.361 --> 00:41:08.695
See you later.

00:41:15.870 --> 00:41:18.246
Why don't we go upstairs,
it's a bit quieter?

00:41:33.053 --> 00:41:34.929
Hi. Hi.

00:41:35.097 --> 00:41:36.097
I'm Tim.

00:41:36.891 --> 00:41:37.932
Mary.

00:41:38.058 --> 00:41:40.685
That's my mother's name.
Let's not get into that.

00:41:40.769 --> 00:41:44.272
Um... I know this is forward but

00:41:44.398 --> 00:41:48.443
your face tells me that you're finding
this party to be a living hell.

00:41:50.529 --> 00:41:51.988
So, I just wondered
if you might come

00:41:52.072 --> 00:41:55.408
and have a bite to
eat with me instead?

00:41:56.118 --> 00:41:57.368
Right now.

00:41:57.703 --> 00:41:58.828
I'm sorry?

00:41:58.913 --> 00:42:01.456
Obviously, I should have
thought this through more.

00:42:01.790 --> 00:42:03.124
Let's talk about Kate Moss.

00:42:05.961 --> 00:42:08.129
I love Kate Moss.

00:42:08.297 --> 00:42:10.965
I always think the key thing
with her is the history,

00:42:11.383 --> 00:42:15.595
you know, the informality of her early
shots compared to high fashion stuff

00:42:15.721 --> 00:42:18.890
so you always know that underneath
she's still just the same

00:42:19.308 --> 00:42:22.477
cheeky normal girl
naked on the beach.

00:42:22.603 --> 00:42:23.603
The beach.

00:42:24.146 --> 00:42:26.814
I agree with you completely.

00:42:27.107 --> 00:42:30.151
If we leave now then we can have,
you know, more than one starter.

00:42:35.407 --> 00:42:37.075
I love your eyes.

00:42:38.953 --> 00:42:41.955
And I love the rest
of your face, too.

00:42:52.174 --> 00:42:53.925
More than one starter?

00:42:54.051 --> 00:42:55.760
10 amazing starters.

00:42:56.845 --> 00:42:58.763
After you. Thanks.

00:42:58.931 --> 00:43:01.099
Ten minutes is long enough
for any party, I think.

00:43:01.183 --> 00:43:03.101
Yeah.

00:43:03.185 --> 00:43:04.519
Especially that one.

00:43:04.687 --> 00:43:06.187
Evening, all.

00:43:06.355 --> 00:43:08.690
God! What a dickhead.

00:43:09.817 --> 00:43:10.775
Yeah.

00:43:13.821 --> 00:43:16.322
So, what do you do?

00:43:17.700 --> 00:43:19.951
I'm a reader at a publisher.

00:43:20.035 --> 00:43:22.704
No! You read for a living?

00:43:23.372 --> 00:43:26.165
Yes, that's it. I read.

00:43:26.292 --> 00:43:27.834
That's so great.

00:43:28.168 --> 00:43:30.044
Itís like someone asking,
'What do you do

00:43:30.170 --> 00:43:32.005
for a living??'
'Well, I breathe.

00:43:32.131 --> 00:43:35.216
'l'm a breather,
I get paid for breathing.?'

00:43:35.718 --> 00:43:39.345
How did you get that job? Okay,
smart-ass, what do you do?

00:43:40.389 --> 00:43:42.223
I am a lawyer.

00:43:42.558 --> 00:43:43.808
Sort of. Sort of.

00:43:43.892 --> 00:43:45.560
That's sexy.

00:43:46.061 --> 00:43:47.395
Is it?

00:43:47.521 --> 00:43:48.896
I mean, I think so.

00:43:49.815 --> 00:43:54.068
In a suit, in a court, saving
people's lives. Kind of sexy.

00:43:54.403 --> 00:43:56.443
I guess it is. Although it's
not as sexy as reading.

00:43:56.530 --> 00:43:59.907
Sitting there in an office,
in a little chair reading.

00:44:00.075 --> 00:44:01.492
Okay, stop. Ooh!

00:44:01.577 --> 00:44:03.244
Just wait right there,
mister, because

00:44:03.329 --> 00:44:05.913
a lot of books get
submitted to my publisher.

00:44:06.081 --> 00:44:07.749
So it's an immense
responsibility.

00:44:07.875 --> 00:44:09.500
I bet it is.

00:44:09.585 --> 00:44:11.586
But when you do normal reading,

00:44:12.421 --> 00:44:15.381
is it ruined because it's your job?
You know, like prostitutes?

00:44:15.507 --> 00:44:17.633
I always worry that when
they stop being prostitutes

00:44:17.718 --> 00:44:19.093
that they can't
enjoy sex any more.

00:44:19.219 --> 00:44:20.595
You always worry about that?

00:44:20.679 --> 00:44:22.805
No, I sometimes worry about it.
Good. Okay.

00:44:22.890 --> 00:44:25.800
Because someone who always worried
about that would be a bit of a worry.

00:44:25.884 --> 00:44:28.552
When you read a newspaper,
do you think,?'Forget this, it's work?'?

00:44:28.736 --> 00:44:30.654
Have you interviewed
a lot of prostitutes?

00:44:30.838 --> 00:44:32.756
When you read a menu,
do you think,

00:44:32.940 --> 00:44:35.709
?'No, I'm not reading this,
unless you pay me hard cash.?'

00:44:35.735 --> 00:44:39.046
How many prostitutes will you need to
talk to before this issue is solved?

00:44:39.114 --> 00:44:43.034
Are you planning to head to
Eastern Europe and Thailand?

00:44:57.216 --> 00:45:00.968
Um... Would you like
to walk me to my car?

00:45:01.095 --> 00:45:03.596
Yes. Why not? Okay.

00:45:03.806 --> 00:45:05.765
Sounds like a good idea.

00:45:06.475 --> 00:45:07.725
What about you?

00:45:07.810 --> 00:45:10.895
Yeah, I have
three older brothers.

00:45:11.105 --> 00:45:12.563
God. Yeah.

00:45:12.648 --> 00:45:14.232
Where are they?

00:45:15.818 --> 00:45:17.402
Behind you.

00:45:26.787 --> 00:45:28.830
Did you have trouble parking?

00:45:30.749 --> 00:45:32.333
Pardon?

00:45:32.459 --> 00:45:34.001
Itís just such
a long way to your car.

00:45:34.169 --> 00:45:36.587
Well, my car's
actually parked outside

00:45:36.713 --> 00:45:39.173
my house.
I got a lift to the party.

00:45:41.510 --> 00:45:42.510
Okay.

00:45:44.430 --> 00:45:46.431
That's good. That's perfect.

00:45:46.849 --> 00:45:47.849
Okay.

00:45:52.604 --> 00:45:54.647
And here we are.

00:45:54.773 --> 00:45:56.691
My God. Yeah.

00:45:56.817 --> 00:46:00.153
Car, house. House, car.

00:46:02.489 --> 00:46:04.657
It makes perfect sense.

00:46:04.950 --> 00:46:06.617
Itís very logical.

00:46:27.973 --> 00:46:28.973
Christ.

00:46:31.393 --> 00:46:32.602
Um...

00:46:35.397 --> 00:46:36.564
Keys!

00:46:50.996 --> 00:46:54.999
I'm gonna go into the bedroom
and put on my new pajamas.

00:46:55.375 --> 00:46:56.375
Right.

00:46:57.419 --> 00:47:00.713
And then in a minute you can
come in and take them off.

00:47:01.673 --> 00:47:03.424
If you want to.

00:47:13.602 --> 00:47:15.102
One minute.

00:47:20.025 --> 00:47:21.025
Hi.

00:47:24.613 --> 00:47:28.449
God. Are you... Are you okay?
Yeah.

00:47:30.786 --> 00:47:31.869
Sorry.

00:47:31.995 --> 00:47:33.079
That's okay.

00:47:56.979 --> 00:47:59.647
Itís a front opener.

00:47:59.773 --> 00:48:01.357
Itís a what?

00:48:01.483 --> 00:48:03.150
It opens from the front.

00:48:04.319 --> 00:48:06.445
Yeah, no, yeah, of course.

00:48:06.613 --> 00:48:08.155
Thanks. Sure.

00:48:10.742 --> 00:48:12.326
Ooh! Well done.

00:48:20.669 --> 00:48:23.004
I'm sure it'll be
better next time.

00:48:24.506 --> 00:48:27.008
I thought it was pretty lovely.

00:48:27.759 --> 00:48:30.177
Right, no,
it was really lovely.

00:48:32.514 --> 00:48:35.182
In fact, can you
just give me one minute?

00:48:36.643 --> 00:48:37.643
Okay.

00:48:43.775 --> 00:48:44.775
Hi.

00:48:47.446 --> 00:48:48.696
Dangerous.

00:48:52.200 --> 00:48:55.119
You really know your bras.

00:48:56.038 --> 00:48:57.079
I like to think so.

00:49:02.544 --> 00:49:06.714
Well done. Some people make a
real mess of it the first time.

00:49:06.840 --> 00:49:08.299
Amateurs.

00:49:10.552 --> 00:49:12.720
Could you give me one second?

00:49:13.805 --> 00:49:14.805
Sure.

00:49:15.974 --> 00:49:17.224
I couldn't wait.

00:49:19.311 --> 00:49:21.479
My goodness.

00:49:26.401 --> 00:49:31.739
Best night of my entire life. And now
I've got a suspicion I'm gonna have

00:49:31.823 --> 00:49:34.659
the best sleep
of my entire life.

00:49:36.328 --> 00:49:39.497
So once is enough
for my perfect guy?

00:49:40.332 --> 00:49:43.000
I'm not sure
that's entirely fair.

00:49:49.424 --> 00:49:51.008
We're late. No, we're not.

00:49:52.511 --> 00:49:55.054
It'll be fine. it's only...
My God.

00:50:06.650 --> 00:50:07.650
Bye.

00:50:15.867 --> 00:50:17.107
Don't worry,
you're coming with.

00:50:23.792 --> 00:50:25.126
I'm taking you home!

00:50:30.966 --> 00:50:32.717
Bye. Bye. Bye.

00:50:34.553 --> 00:50:35.553
No!

00:51:21.558 --> 00:51:23.851
Okay. I have some bad news.

00:51:24.561 --> 00:51:26.645
You're dying? No, not that bad.

00:51:26.730 --> 00:51:28.522
I'm dying? No.

00:51:28.690 --> 00:51:32.193
My parents are in town. They're
visiting and they're coming around.

00:51:32.360 --> 00:51:34.320
God. Parents?
American parents?

00:51:35.572 --> 00:51:37.031
When? Now.

00:51:37.365 --> 00:51:39.158
They told me and
I didn't tell you

00:51:39.493 --> 00:51:42.294
and I thought they'd cancel because
they normally do and they didn't.

00:51:42.378 --> 00:51:43.929
Now now? Now now.

00:51:44.014 --> 00:51:45.615
So you should probably
put on some pants.

00:51:46.541 --> 00:51:48.918
God. Okay, okay.

00:51:49.002 --> 00:51:51.670
I'm
sorry, I'm sorry.

00:51:51.797 --> 00:51:53.214
Do
they know I exist?

00:51:53.381 --> 00:51:57.510
Yeah. I've mentioned something
like you, but nothing very specific.

00:51:57.594 --> 00:52:01.388
Yeah, they're quite conservative,
so maybe not those pants.

00:52:03.892 --> 00:52:05.559
Okay. Yeah.

00:52:05.769 --> 00:52:08.729
God. Okay.

00:52:10.899 --> 00:52:13.609
Could you just stall them.
Stall them.

00:52:16.696 --> 00:52:17.696
Come on up.

00:52:18.198 --> 00:52:20.741
What? I'm sorry, they
don't like waiting.

00:52:20.867 --> 00:52:22.576
Okay. Do I live here?

00:52:22.702 --> 00:52:24.370
Definitely not.

00:52:24.913 --> 00:52:26.497
Are we having sex?

00:52:26.623 --> 00:52:28.249
Yeah. But not oral.

00:52:28.416 --> 00:52:29.750
I wasn't gonna mention oral.

00:52:29.876 --> 00:52:32.628
Okay, good, don't. How did you
think that was gonna come up?

00:52:32.754 --> 00:52:34.154
Could you help me
with this, please?

00:52:34.256 --> 00:52:37.424
I don't know. if it does,
just deny it completely.

00:52:37.592 --> 00:52:39.593
Who's gonna bring it up?
Your dad?

00:52:39.719 --> 00:52:42.429
?'Tim, had any cunnilingus
with my daughter recently??'

00:52:42.556 --> 00:52:43.806
Well, you never know.

00:52:43.932 --> 00:52:45.224
Okay.

00:52:45.767 --> 00:52:47.852
Okay. Ready? Yeah.

00:52:49.104 --> 00:52:51.105
They're there.
They are, yeah.

00:52:51.273 --> 00:52:52.940
Yeah, right behind you.
Okay. Right, okay.

00:52:56.278 --> 00:52:58.112
Dad! Hello, sweet.

00:52:58.321 --> 00:53:00.406
Mom. Hi. Hi, honey.

00:53:00.490 --> 00:53:02.950
This is Tim.

00:53:03.118 --> 00:53:05.160
Hello, sir. Ma'am.

00:53:05.745 --> 00:53:08.622
Should we come back when you
haven't got any company, or...

00:53:09.791 --> 00:53:12.042
Well, that would be
quite difficult

00:53:12.168 --> 00:53:14.461
because Tim
actually lives here.

00:53:15.964 --> 00:53:18.299
Really? With you?

00:53:18.633 --> 00:53:22.303
Yes. Yeah, but no
oral sex, I promise you.

00:53:24.139 --> 00:53:25.639
I beg your pardon?

00:53:26.600 --> 00:53:28.100
Excuse me.

00:53:29.477 --> 00:53:33.147
So, Tim, tell us where are you
from, which part of the country?

00:53:33.773 --> 00:53:36.358
He's from Cornwall.
Yeah, it's really pretty.

00:53:36.484 --> 00:53:40.154
Itís that little bit right at the
end, sort of looks like a shoe.

00:53:40.822 --> 00:53:42.281
And you're a lawyer,
is that right?

00:53:43.158 --> 00:53:45.284
Yep, that's right.
And he never loses.

00:53:45.368 --> 00:53:48.667
You don't think he's gonna win, then he
just pulls something out of the bag and,

00:53:48.705 --> 00:53:49.955
what do you know,
he wins again.

00:53:50.040 --> 00:53:53.334
Do you ever answer
any of your own questions?

00:53:53.501 --> 00:53:55.127
I...

00:53:55.211 --> 00:53:57.880
Yes, he does. Usually he does,

00:53:58.006 --> 00:53:59.246
but not today because I'm doing

00:53:59.341 --> 00:54:00.981
all the talking
because I'm really nervous

00:54:01.301 --> 00:54:06.013
and I kind of love him and I just...
l want you to, too.

00:54:06.139 --> 00:54:07.681
Honey.

00:54:07.974 --> 00:54:10.476
Sorry. Tim. Over to you.

00:54:10.977 --> 00:54:11.977
Shoot.

00:54:13.688 --> 00:54:14.813
Yeah, I think my dad...

00:54:14.940 --> 00:54:17.191
Can I just say one more thing?
Um...

00:54:17.734 --> 00:54:19.568
Thank God that's over.

00:54:19.694 --> 00:54:20.945
I got given two tickets

00:54:21.029 --> 00:54:23.280
for the National Theatre
tomorrow. Do you wanna come?

00:54:23.365 --> 00:54:27.368
No, so not. I'm just
gonna sleep all day.

00:54:27.827 --> 00:54:31.372
I don't see why going to the theatre
should get in the way of that.

00:54:31.498 --> 00:54:34.875
Many of the best sleeps of my life have
happened in the Royal Shakespeare Company.

00:54:35.335 --> 00:54:37.544
No, you take someone else.

00:54:37.712 --> 00:54:41.548
I really like bed and
I really hate theatre.

00:54:42.008 --> 00:54:43.384
Quite right.

00:54:44.511 --> 00:54:48.180
But what kind of sad act is gonna
be free on a Saturday night

00:54:48.765 --> 00:54:50.808
with no day's notice?

00:54:52.060 --> 00:54:53.060
Bravo.

00:54:55.772 --> 00:54:58.232
My God. it's Charlotte. Who?

00:54:58.733 --> 00:55:00.567
It was my first love. Where?

00:55:00.735 --> 00:55:02.695
There. Under the ?'exit?' sign.

00:55:02.779 --> 00:55:04.446
- The old woman?
- No, not the old woman.

00:55:04.531 --> 00:55:05.781
The astonishing blonde.

00:55:05.865 --> 00:55:07.533
The one with the dark hair?
No, blonde.

00:55:07.617 --> 00:55:09.243
Blonde means
blonde hair, doesn't it?

00:55:10.412 --> 00:55:11.954
Off the stage.

00:55:12.372 --> 00:55:14.623
Okay, you stay there.
I mean it, stay!

00:55:27.053 --> 00:55:28.053
Charlotte.

00:55:29.097 --> 00:55:31.098
My God. Tim.

00:55:31.641 --> 00:55:34.143
How fabulous to see you.

00:55:35.145 --> 00:55:38.397
Wow. I... This is
my girlfriend Tina.

00:55:38.481 --> 00:55:39.773
No.

00:55:41.484 --> 00:55:44.069
That is so brilliant.
Well, hello, Tina.

00:55:44.154 --> 00:55:45.779
Why is it brilliant?

00:55:45.905 --> 00:55:49.057
Well, you know. There are certain moments
in your life that scar you for life.

00:55:49.083 --> 00:55:52.085
Charlotte's rejection of me
was one of those moments,

00:55:52.153 --> 00:55:54.780
but now I know she's
got a ?'girlfriend, ?' well,

00:55:54.864 --> 00:55:57.349
that's just a huge burden
suddenly lifted off my mind.

00:55:57.433 --> 00:56:00.135
I can be a confident
heterosexual all over again.

00:56:01.963 --> 00:56:04.590
Not that kind of girlfriend.

00:56:06.259 --> 00:56:07.259
What?

00:56:08.011 --> 00:56:09.636
You think I'm gay?

00:56:10.764 --> 00:56:11.764
No.

00:56:12.265 --> 00:56:15.934
No, of course not.
No. it's girl friend.

00:56:16.019 --> 00:56:17.936
Yes. No. Wow.

00:56:18.021 --> 00:56:21.482
Yeah, friend who is a girl,
which you so clearly are.

00:56:21.649 --> 00:56:25.444
I'm just gonna go and get my
boyfriend, who is a boy...

00:56:31.618 --> 00:56:33.786
My God. Tim.

00:56:34.329 --> 00:56:37.122
How lovely to see you.
Look at you. Wow.

00:56:37.207 --> 00:56:38.916
This is my girlfriend Tina.

00:56:40.627 --> 00:56:42.336
Hello, Tina.
Although you should be

00:56:42.462 --> 00:56:44.171
a little careful
with that, by the way.

00:56:44.297 --> 00:56:47.341
There are still quite a lot of
us old fashioned types about

00:56:47.467 --> 00:56:49.676
who interpret girlfriend
as meaning gay.

00:56:49.803 --> 00:56:53.066
So if you say that Tina's your girlfriend,
people will assume that you're ?'gay.?'

00:56:54.015 --> 00:56:55.474
I am 'gay.'

00:56:56.476 --> 00:56:57.684
Are you?

00:56:57.852 --> 00:56:59.092
Do you have
a problem with that?

00:56:59.854 --> 00:57:02.731
No, I don't. I love that stuff.

00:57:03.525 --> 00:57:04.691
I'm just gonna...

00:57:07.195 --> 00:57:08.195
Wow.

00:57:08.696 --> 00:57:11.532
I've just seen the girl who broke
my heart three summers ago.

00:57:11.658 --> 00:57:13.534
Let's go say hello.

00:57:13.660 --> 00:57:15.536
No. Best let sleeping dogs lie.
Come on.

00:57:15.703 --> 00:57:18.080
Best night of my life.
I always love this area.

00:57:18.164 --> 00:57:20.541
Itís so bustling and I mean
those pictures, full of colour.

00:57:20.708 --> 00:57:23.794
Just makes me so happy when I'm
round here, all the colour... Tim.

00:57:23.878 --> 00:57:25.212
Charlotte!

00:57:25.338 --> 00:57:26.713
Tim, how lovely to see you.

00:57:26.840 --> 00:57:28.340
What a surprise.

00:57:28.424 --> 00:57:31.385
Wow. Sorry. This is
my girlfriend, Tina.

00:57:31.553 --> 00:57:33.387
She's gay. Shut up.

00:57:33.513 --> 00:57:34.721
Hello, Tina.

00:57:34.848 --> 00:57:36.056
Look at you!

00:57:36.182 --> 00:57:38.016
It just never
even occurred to me

00:57:38.143 --> 00:57:39.935
you existed
outside of Cornwall.

00:57:40.728 --> 00:57:42.896
We're about to
go and get dinner,

00:57:43.022 --> 00:57:45.107
but it would be great
to hang out sometime.

00:57:45.233 --> 00:57:47.067
Yeah, sure. I'd love that.

00:57:47.235 --> 00:57:49.027
Send my love to little Kit Kat.
How is she?

00:57:49.571 --> 00:57:53.073
She's okay. She's not finding
London totally easy actually.

00:57:53.241 --> 00:57:55.409
Right. Well, Jimmy says
he sees her sometimes.

00:57:55.702 --> 00:57:57.119
Really? Since when?

00:57:57.245 --> 00:57:59.288
You knew there was
always something there.

00:57:59.414 --> 00:58:01.081
Sorry, you are?

00:58:01.249 --> 00:58:02.249
Very well, thank you.

00:58:02.417 --> 00:58:03.457
Well, she means your name.

00:58:03.585 --> 00:58:04.918
Roger. No, it's not.

00:58:05.044 --> 00:58:07.379
No, it's not. it's Rory.

00:58:07.463 --> 00:58:09.381
Nice to meet you, Rory. Yeah.

00:58:10.091 --> 00:58:11.800
Right. Sorry,
we should get going.

00:58:11.926 --> 00:58:13.260
It was really great to see you.

00:58:13.344 --> 00:58:14.761
I'll see you soon.
You, too. Yeah.

00:58:15.263 --> 00:58:16.263
Bye.

00:58:16.639 --> 00:58:18.473
God, she is beautiful.

00:58:19.934 --> 00:58:23.604
She's so beautiful, if you had sex
with her, you'd die. You'd just die.

00:58:23.730 --> 00:58:27.107
You'd open her shirt, see her breasts
and your eyes would explode.

00:58:27.233 --> 00:58:29.514
You'd have to have sex with her blind.
And then you'd die.

00:58:29.611 --> 00:58:32.154
You notice she didn't
give me her number...

00:58:32.280 --> 00:58:36.158
I told Tina to go have dinner on her own.
Are you hungry?

00:58:36.284 --> 00:58:38.785
Yeah. Of course. Great.

00:58:39.245 --> 00:58:40.787
Bye, Roger.

00:58:41.080 --> 00:58:42.748
Yeah, excellent.

00:58:43.124 --> 00:58:45.614
Thanks again for the play. Triumph.
Where do you wanna go?

00:58:45.835 --> 00:58:48.253
Well, wherever you like really.

00:58:48.338 --> 00:58:50.797
I can't compete.

00:59:02.268 --> 00:59:03.352
You know,

00:59:03.686 --> 00:59:07.648
I'm starting to think we slightly
wasted that summer holiday.

00:59:08.483 --> 00:59:11.193
If we could
travel back in time,

00:59:11.319 --> 00:59:13.862
maybe I wouldn't have said no.

00:59:15.782 --> 00:59:16.782
I'm...

00:59:17.659 --> 00:59:19.660
I'm just staying
round the corner.

00:59:19.786 --> 00:59:21.328
Can you walk me home?

00:59:22.956 --> 00:59:23.956
Yeah.

00:59:24.540 --> 00:59:26.375
Yeah? Yeah, of course, yeah.

00:59:36.344 --> 00:59:38.804
Well, here we are.

00:59:44.185 --> 00:59:46.019
it's a lot nicer

00:59:46.437 --> 00:59:47.604
inside.

00:59:48.314 --> 00:59:49.856
I'm sure it is.

00:59:57.031 --> 00:59:59.032
So... So...

01:00:00.201 --> 01:00:01.201
So...

01:00:03.371 --> 01:00:04.371
So,

01:00:04.789 --> 01:00:06.123
lovely

01:00:07.458 --> 01:00:09.376
to see you, Charlotte.

01:00:09.502 --> 01:00:13.213
What a night.
Total joy, but I've gotta

01:00:14.215 --> 01:00:15.716
get back

01:00:16.551 --> 01:00:19.886
because there's something very important
that I have to do. Right now.

01:00:53.087 --> 01:00:56.381
Wake up. Wake up. What?

01:00:56.549 --> 01:00:57.549
Mary.

01:00:58.926 --> 01:01:00.677
Would you like to marry me?

01:01:00.762 --> 01:01:01.970
Shh.

01:01:02.263 --> 01:01:06.266
Don't be so selfish,
I'm sleeping. it's bad.

01:01:08.394 --> 01:01:09.394
Right.

01:01:10.355 --> 01:01:12.189
That went very well.

01:01:19.697 --> 01:01:20.947
Wake up.

01:01:21.115 --> 01:01:22.115
What?

01:01:23.701 --> 01:01:25.702
Wake up. Come and have a chat.

01:01:25.787 --> 01:01:26.787
Why?

01:01:27.955 --> 01:01:30.374
I've got something
important to ask you.

01:01:33.211 --> 01:01:35.295
Can't it wait till morning?

01:01:35.630 --> 01:01:37.255
Not really.

01:01:38.216 --> 01:01:41.218
But I'm so comfy.

01:01:41.719 --> 01:01:44.388
I was having
the loveliest dream.

01:01:45.139 --> 01:01:46.765
What is it?

01:01:47.475 --> 01:01:49.976
Why is there music on?

01:01:50.436 --> 01:01:53.146
Itís got something to do
with what I want to ask you.

01:01:54.816 --> 01:01:56.650
Wait a minute.

01:01:57.485 --> 01:01:59.444
Romantic music.

01:02:00.822 --> 01:02:03.323
Guy with important question.

01:02:03.491 --> 01:02:05.117
Are you on your knees?

01:02:05.618 --> 01:02:07.619
On his knees.

01:02:09.497 --> 01:02:12.290
Were you so bored in
the play you decided

01:02:12.417 --> 01:02:15.168
to ask me to
marry you afterwards?

01:02:17.463 --> 01:02:19.131
Something like that.

01:02:22.427 --> 01:02:24.428
Yeah. Exactly that.

01:02:25.805 --> 01:02:27.139
In fact,

01:02:30.184 --> 01:02:32.018
will you marry me?

01:02:38.526 --> 01:02:40.527
Any thoughts on the answer?

01:02:41.154 --> 01:02:45.157
'Yes'  'No' Get out of my life,
loser.' They're all possible.

01:02:48.703 --> 01:02:51.371
I think I'll go for

01:02:53.040 --> 01:02:54.040
'yes.'

01:02:59.839 --> 01:03:02.007
Thank you for asking me.

01:03:02.550 --> 01:03:07.179
And thank you for not going for one
of those melodramatic proposals

01:03:07.305 --> 01:03:09.681
with lots of people around.

01:03:10.224 --> 01:03:12.142
I hate other people.

01:03:12.560 --> 01:03:13.852
Me, too.

01:03:14.562 --> 01:03:15.562
Yeah.

01:03:17.190 --> 01:03:19.399
I'm just gonna
turn off the radio.

01:03:19.859 --> 01:03:22.068
Okay. Good idea.

01:03:29.744 --> 01:03:32.913
Thanks, guys.
Sorry, she's a bit tired.

01:03:33.748 --> 01:03:37.834
But we really appreciate it.
Can you go?

01:03:46.928 --> 01:03:48.261
Wow!

01:03:48.596 --> 01:03:50.597
That's so beautiful.

01:03:50.723 --> 01:03:53.350
I don't think we'll be staying
in the same room, somehow.

01:03:53.434 --> 01:03:54.684
Really?

01:03:54.769 --> 01:03:57.771
If they offer you tea,
just say no.

01:03:58.564 --> 01:03:59.940
Hello.

01:04:00.066 --> 01:04:01.441
Mum, this is Mary.

01:04:01.567 --> 01:04:02.901
Mary! Hi.

01:04:03.027 --> 01:04:04.611
Good Lord, you're pretty.

01:04:04.779 --> 01:04:06.363
No, it's just

01:04:06.781 --> 01:04:09.282
I've got a lot of
mascara and lipstick on.

01:04:09.408 --> 01:04:10.784
Let's have a look.

01:04:10.910 --> 01:04:13.453
Yes. Good.

01:04:13.913 --> 01:04:17.374
Itís very bad for
a girl to be too pretty.

01:04:17.458 --> 01:04:21.628
It stops her developing a sense of humor.
Or a personality.

01:04:22.380 --> 01:04:23.380
Tea?

01:04:23.798 --> 01:04:25.340
I'd love a cup of tea.

01:04:25.466 --> 01:04:27.050
Christ,
that's the whole day gone.

01:04:27.760 --> 01:04:30.804
She's a very special guest.
Cup without the crack.

01:04:30.930 --> 01:04:32.180
Skipping stones.

01:04:32.265 --> 01:04:34.975
They've been doing this
since he was about this high.

01:04:35.309 --> 01:04:38.770
And what are your faults?
I mean, little weaknesses.

01:04:41.649 --> 01:04:43.733
I...

01:04:45.570 --> 01:04:47.571
Well, I'm very insecure.

01:04:47.822 --> 01:04:49.114
Sweet.

01:04:50.074 --> 01:04:54.119
Okay. I've a very
bad temper sometimes.

01:04:54.245 --> 01:04:55.912
Crucial. How else are you gonna

01:04:56.038 --> 01:04:57.747
get a fella to
do what you want?

01:05:00.167 --> 01:05:02.335
And, of course, I have...

01:05:02.753 --> 01:05:04.129
I have a weakness for your son.

01:05:04.255 --> 01:05:05.630
So do I.

01:05:06.007 --> 01:05:09.676
But best not to tell him.
Don't want him getting cocky.

01:05:13.681 --> 01:05:14.764
Pow!

01:05:14.849 --> 01:05:17.183
I'm so good
without the ball. Pow!

01:05:19.020 --> 01:05:20.437
What do you think of her?

01:05:20.521 --> 01:05:22.147
I like her more
than you already.

01:05:24.483 --> 01:05:28.528
Look, I'd forgotten this.
Jimmy Fontana Il Mondo.

01:05:28.654 --> 01:05:30.614
Greatest record ever
recorded by an ltalian

01:05:30.698 --> 01:05:32.796
who looks like he's got a
dead badger on his head.

01:05:32.835 --> 01:05:33.863
And you've got the album.

01:05:33.951 --> 01:05:35.160
Yes!

01:05:35.286 --> 01:05:36.870
Check out those specs!

01:05:39.373 --> 01:05:42.542
Come on, on with the game!
Right.

01:05:42.877 --> 01:05:44.794
And what an extraordinary
game this is.

01:05:44.920 --> 01:05:46.838
For the first time
a father and son

01:05:46.964 --> 01:05:48.715
are playing each other
in the World Table

01:05:48.883 --> 01:05:50.643
Tennis Final and
neither of them are Chinese.

01:05:50.718 --> 01:05:53.303
Tremendous play from the old
World Champion and his son,

01:05:53.387 --> 01:05:56.056
the first openly ginger
British table tennis player

01:05:56.223 --> 01:05:58.311
but there are signs the
youngster's beginning to crack.

01:05:58.350 --> 01:06:00.769
There are tears in his eyes.
There are not!

01:06:00.895 --> 01:06:02.354
There soon will be!

01:06:06.901 --> 01:06:07.901
Hey.

01:06:09.320 --> 01:06:11.196
Hey!
I didn't know you were here.

01:06:11.864 --> 01:06:14.324
Yeah. I just
popped down for a while.

01:06:14.408 --> 01:06:15.575
Okay.

01:06:15.910 --> 01:06:17.160
What about the job?

01:06:19.163 --> 01:06:20.497
So how long have you been here?

01:06:20.581 --> 01:06:22.374
Couple of weeks.

01:06:22.500 --> 01:06:24.751
Gosh! So, life in London...

01:06:25.586 --> 01:06:26.753
Horrid.

01:06:26.921 --> 01:06:27.921
Okay.

01:06:29.674 --> 01:06:31.174
Is Mary here?

01:06:31.258 --> 01:06:32.425
Yes.

01:06:32.593 --> 01:06:34.094
Where? Downstairs.

01:06:35.262 --> 01:06:37.263
You be gentle.

01:06:38.265 --> 01:06:39.766
Be gentle!

01:06:44.063 --> 01:06:45.397
Careful!

01:06:46.273 --> 01:06:50.568
Yeah, nice to see you, too. I'm
trying to make a good impression...

01:06:50.695 --> 01:06:52.655
Yeah, you make a good impression.

01:06:53.531 --> 01:06:55.281
Right, sorry. Sorry.

01:06:55.408 --> 01:06:57.951
I've got an important
announcement to make.

01:06:58.077 --> 01:06:59.786
Exciting.

01:07:00.955 --> 01:07:03.498
We've decided, after a little
bit of thought, to get married.

01:07:06.752 --> 01:07:09.129
That's wonderful news.

01:07:09.296 --> 01:07:10.922
Who are you getting married to?

01:07:11.966 --> 01:07:13.925
To Mary. Over there.

01:07:14.051 --> 01:07:16.052
Thank God for that.

01:07:16.262 --> 01:07:19.264
Jolly embarrassing if it had
been another girl. imagine that.

01:07:19.765 --> 01:07:21.474
We're so pleased.

01:07:21.976 --> 01:07:23.601
No, sorry. Yeah.

01:07:23.728 --> 01:07:26.813
By the way, the wedding
will be quite soon

01:07:27.815 --> 01:07:29.733
because we're
having a baby, too.

01:07:37.324 --> 01:07:38.491
You're pregnant?

01:07:38.617 --> 01:07:39.784
Yes.

01:07:40.077 --> 01:07:41.494
Who's the father?

01:07:42.121 --> 01:07:43.830
Well, Tim, I hope.

01:07:44.248 --> 01:07:48.251
Thank God for that. Jolly awkward
if it had been another fellow.

01:07:52.006 --> 01:07:53.506
We have to decide tonight.

01:07:53.632 --> 01:07:55.341
What? Everything.

01:07:55.593 --> 01:07:58.178
The only thing
you've decided about our

01:07:58.262 --> 01:08:00.180
wedding is that I'm
coming down the aisle

01:08:00.264 --> 01:08:02.474
to the sound of
some ltalian weirdo

01:08:02.600 --> 01:08:04.768
singing a song called Il Mondo.

01:08:04.852 --> 01:08:05.769
Excellent song.

01:08:05.853 --> 01:08:08.104
To which I've said
a definitive 'no.'

01:08:08.189 --> 01:08:09.856
So here's the deal.

01:08:10.024 --> 01:08:13.526
I will take off one item of clothing
for every decision you make.

01:08:14.695 --> 01:08:17.697
Okay. You have my attention,
young lady.

01:08:17.990 --> 01:08:19.324
Right, um,

01:08:20.451 --> 01:08:22.076
where would you
like to get married?

01:08:23.537 --> 01:08:25.997
Home. I'd hate anywhere else.

01:08:26.123 --> 01:08:27.123
Okay.

01:08:27.833 --> 01:08:29.667
My God. Good.

01:08:29.794 --> 01:08:31.127
Who should the priest be?

01:08:31.212 --> 01:08:32.712
It'll have to be
the local bloke

01:08:32.838 --> 01:08:34.478
with yellow teeth and
the massive unibrow.

01:08:34.715 --> 01:08:35.715
Okay.

01:08:36.217 --> 01:08:38.843
That's a lock for Hagrid.

01:08:40.095 --> 01:08:41.346
Um...

01:08:41.722 --> 01:08:42.806
Best Man?

01:08:42.932 --> 01:08:44.015
Damn.

01:08:44.141 --> 01:08:45.809
Best Man. Now.

01:08:45.935 --> 01:08:48.582
No, this is so hard. It's lose-lose you know
You piss off all the

01:08:48.621 --> 01:08:51.088
ones you don't pick, and you end
up hating the one you do pick

01:08:51.256 --> 01:08:53.299
because he makes a bad
speech and ruins the day.

01:08:53.383 --> 01:08:54.926
Do you wanna see
these puppies or not?

01:08:54.952 --> 01:08:56.494
Yes, I do.

01:08:56.987 --> 01:08:58.705
Jay. it's your choice.

01:08:59.031 --> 01:09:00.511
He's my best friend,
but he's a moron.

01:09:00.574 --> 01:09:01.991
Yeah, he will
mess up everything.

01:09:02.076 --> 01:09:03.409
Rory. Sure?

01:09:03.536 --> 01:09:04.869
No, Harry.

01:09:04.995 --> 01:09:06.329
Harry it is. Let's do this.

01:09:08.415 --> 01:09:09.874
Rory. Sorry.

01:09:10.000 --> 01:09:11.417
What? That's such a cheat.

01:09:12.920 --> 01:09:14.045
Okay, fine.

01:09:14.171 --> 01:09:15.547
Honeymoon?

01:09:16.006 --> 01:09:17.674
Bed and breakfast in Scotland.

01:09:17.758 --> 01:09:20.218
I am not taking
my pants off for Scotland.

01:09:20.344 --> 01:09:22.846
But it's all we can afford.
Take off your pants.

01:09:22.930 --> 01:09:24.055
I will not.

01:09:24.181 --> 01:09:25.265
Take off your pants!

01:09:25.432 --> 01:09:27.725
I want
two weeks in Bali!

01:09:27.852 --> 01:09:29.185
Take off those pants!

01:09:36.235 --> 01:09:38.069
Have you planned a break? No.

01:09:47.955 --> 01:09:51.705
No! Is that you? It wasn't me.

01:10:11.770 --> 01:10:13.313
Itís for you.

01:10:47.222 --> 01:10:49.140
No, I'm caught!
I've got it. I've got it!

01:10:49.558 --> 01:10:50.683
Help me!

01:10:55.522 --> 01:10:56.814
Yes!

01:11:00.402 --> 01:11:01.945
Right, follow me!

01:11:04.365 --> 01:11:05.865
My gosh!

01:11:07.826 --> 01:11:09.202
My God!

01:11:11.997 --> 01:11:12.997
God!

01:11:20.047 --> 01:11:21.255
it's a joke!

01:11:24.885 --> 01:11:25.885
Here.

01:11:30.891 --> 01:11:32.517
Yes, come on.

01:11:32.851 --> 01:11:34.060
This way.

01:11:49.201 --> 01:11:50.910
My God!

01:12:17.271 --> 01:12:18.354
Hello,

01:12:18.689 --> 01:12:20.189
I'm Rory.

01:12:21.233 --> 01:12:25.737
When Tim asked me to
be his Best Man, I was terrified.

01:12:25.863 --> 01:12:28.573
So I thought best
thing is to find

01:12:28.699 --> 01:12:31.409
a book about speeches.
And here it is.

01:12:32.202 --> 01:12:35.955
And it says think of
really funny anecdotes.

01:12:36.874 --> 01:12:41.836
And there is a very hilarious
story, actually from work.

01:12:42.546 --> 01:12:45.506
It was quite a complicated
case based on an issue of

01:12:45.632 --> 01:12:47.467
cross-amortisation
of ownership of

01:12:47.551 --> 01:12:49.135
post-divorce
properties and, um...

01:12:51.263 --> 01:12:54.098
Let me just explain the context.
The Defendant...

01:12:57.895 --> 01:13:00.146
When Tim asked me
to do his Best Man speech,

01:13:00.272 --> 01:13:02.523
my immediate reaction was,

01:13:02.649 --> 01:13:04.569
?'How much are you gonna
pay me, you little shit?

01:13:04.651 --> 01:13:06.944
?'l don't write
for free, you know.?'

01:13:07.029 --> 01:13:10.156
These were the girls available
to him at that time.

01:13:10.282 --> 01:13:13.534
?'Hello, girls.?' And this is how
far he got with each of them.

01:13:13.660 --> 01:13:16.746
Let me explain the code.
5, blow job.

01:13:19.458 --> 01:13:23.669
8, full penetrative...
and so a toast

01:13:23.796 --> 01:13:25.755
to the man with
the worst haircut

01:13:25.881 --> 01:13:27.840
but the best bride in the room.

01:13:28.300 --> 01:13:30.051
Ladies and gentlemen,
Tim and Mary.

01:13:30.177 --> 01:13:32.178
Tim and Mary.

01:13:32.971 --> 01:13:34.055
That's us.

01:13:35.015 --> 01:13:36.974
I wish I'd said 'l love you.'

01:13:37.101 --> 01:13:38.768
You did, Dad.

01:13:39.186 --> 01:13:40.436
It was implied.

01:13:40.562 --> 01:13:44.649
I'm not sure 'implied' is good
enough for a wedding day, are you?

01:13:44.775 --> 01:13:46.943
No, don't do it, it's fine.

01:13:47.069 --> 01:13:50.905
I'm so happy with it as it was.
You really don't have to.

01:13:51.031 --> 01:13:53.324
I'll do what
I wanna do, young man.

01:13:53.450 --> 01:13:55.701
Will you excuse me
for just one moment?

01:13:57.621 --> 01:14:00.540
later on I may tell you about

01:14:00.666 --> 01:14:05.044
Tim's many failings as a man
and as a table tennis player.

01:14:05.170 --> 01:14:06.170
But,

01:14:06.463 --> 01:14:08.798
important first to say the one

01:14:10.592 --> 01:14:13.302
big thing, I've only loved

01:14:13.428 --> 01:14:16.764
three men in my life.

01:14:17.224 --> 01:14:19.267
My dad was
a frosty bugger so that

01:14:19.393 --> 01:14:21.435
only leaves dear Uncle Desmond,

01:14:23.981 --> 01:14:27.733
B. B. King, obviously,
and this young man here.

01:14:28.443 --> 01:14:32.780
I'd only give one piece of
advice to anyone marrying.

01:14:33.490 --> 01:14:36.325
We're all quite
similar in the end.

01:14:36.451 --> 01:14:40.079
We all get old and tell the
same tales too many times.

01:14:40.164 --> 01:14:43.499
But try and marry someone

01:14:44.918 --> 01:14:45.918
kind.

01:14:46.670 --> 01:14:49.005
And this is a kind man

01:14:49.673 --> 01:14:51.424
with a good heart.

01:14:51.800 --> 01:14:54.677
I'm not particularly proud

01:14:54.803 --> 01:14:58.431
of many things in my life,
but I am very proud

01:15:00.100 --> 01:15:02.101
to be the father of my son.

01:15:05.606 --> 01:15:09.942
I'm so sorry to disturb you, but I
wonder if I could have your autograph.

01:15:10.027 --> 01:15:12.069
No. No.

01:15:12.654 --> 01:15:13.934
I'm at a wedding,
for God's sake.

01:15:13.989 --> 01:15:16.324
I'm here to
celebrate true love not

01:15:16.450 --> 01:15:18.826
scribble my illegible
signature on stupid

01:15:18.952 --> 01:15:21.329
bits of paper that
you can flog on eBay

01:15:21.455 --> 01:15:24.624
so that at the next wedding you
can wear a less hideous hat.

01:15:24.791 --> 01:15:27.126
I see you've met my Aunt May.

01:15:27.211 --> 01:15:31.005
God. People should
wear name tags.

01:15:32.132 --> 01:15:34.217
You next, Kittle Kattle.

01:15:35.469 --> 01:15:37.470
I don't know, Uncle D.

01:15:39.306 --> 01:15:41.182
Boys aren't very nice.

01:15:41.725 --> 01:15:43.309
Aren't they, darling?

01:15:43.810 --> 01:15:45.686
Not in my experience.

01:15:46.813 --> 01:15:48.814
They're always
taking liberties,

01:15:48.982 --> 01:15:51.025
not giving much back in return.

01:15:54.863 --> 01:15:56.405
Itís yummy. Yeah?

01:15:56.531 --> 01:15:58.658
I like the way you say 'yummy.'

01:16:06.500 --> 01:16:09.669
Do you wish we'd picked
another less wet day?

01:16:09.753 --> 01:16:10.753
No.

01:16:11.838 --> 01:16:13.714
Not for the world.

01:16:18.887 --> 01:16:21.222
And so it begins.

01:16:21.682 --> 01:16:24.600
Lots and lots of types of days.

01:16:25.519 --> 01:16:26.519
Fun!

01:16:33.026 --> 01:16:34.026
Posy.

01:16:35.654 --> 01:16:37.363
Posy she is.

01:16:37.990 --> 01:16:40.199
The most beautiful
girl in the world.

01:16:43.578 --> 01:16:47.581
You want your daddy.
Yes, I know.

01:16:50.877 --> 01:16:51.877
Yeah.

01:16:54.923 --> 01:16:56.303
No one can ever
prepare you for

01:16:56.341 --> 01:16:58.551
what happens when
you have a child.

01:16:58.719 --> 01:17:00.303
When you see
the baby in your arms

01:17:00.387 --> 01:17:03.014
and you know that
it's your job now.

01:17:03.932 --> 01:17:07.768
No one can prepare you for
the love and the fear.

01:17:09.396 --> 01:17:11.355
She's lovely.

01:17:12.399 --> 01:17:14.400
You were such an ugly baby.

01:17:14.735 --> 01:17:16.402
More chimpanzee than child.

01:17:17.070 --> 01:17:18.571
I remember
the first time I saw you,

01:17:18.655 --> 01:17:21.574
I thanked God we were in driving
distance of London Zoo.

01:17:22.784 --> 01:17:24.285
Come on, hand over
the little bugger,

01:17:24.369 --> 01:17:25.870
let's see if she bounces.

01:17:25.954 --> 01:17:27.747
Yeah,
she definitely will bounce.

01:17:27.914 --> 01:17:29.040
Look.

01:17:29.166 --> 01:17:30.291
She can do anything.

01:17:30.417 --> 01:17:32.376
Look. Hello.

01:17:34.588 --> 01:17:36.047
Sweetheart.

01:17:37.090 --> 01:17:38.799
No one can prepare you
for the love

01:17:38.925 --> 01:17:40.718
people you love
can feel for them.

01:17:42.929 --> 01:17:44.347
And nothing can prepare you for

01:17:44.431 --> 01:17:46.391
the indifference of friends
who don't have babies.

01:17:46.475 --> 01:17:48.267
Do you wanna
go to Uncle Jay?

01:17:48.435 --> 01:17:50.269
No, thanks, it's fine.
It's great.

01:17:50.604 --> 01:17:52.813
And it's a shock how
quickly you have to move

01:17:52.898 --> 01:17:55.733
to a new place you
completely can't afford.

01:17:56.318 --> 01:17:57.777
Look what we found.

01:17:57.903 --> 01:17:59.320
Look who it is!

01:17:59.905 --> 01:18:00.988
Honey!

01:18:01.114 --> 01:18:02.239
Sorry.

01:18:04.951 --> 01:18:08.621
Suddenly, time travel seems
almost unnecessary,

01:18:08.747 --> 01:18:10.790
because every detail of
life is so delightful.

01:18:18.298 --> 01:18:19.757
What's his name?

01:18:19.841 --> 01:18:20.966
Horace, I think.

01:18:21.134 --> 01:18:22.259
Of course it is.

01:18:22.344 --> 01:18:24.553
Only one important thing
for a godfather, I'm told,

01:18:24.638 --> 01:18:26.972
never bring a present
smaller than the child.

01:18:27.140 --> 01:18:29.475
Shut up, you smug bastard.

01:18:29.601 --> 01:18:31.477
Don't worry, I didn't
bring anything at all.

01:18:31.645 --> 01:18:33.521
She'll never know.
Hasn't got a brain yet.

01:18:33.647 --> 01:18:35.648
I didn't expect to
see you here, Harry.

01:18:35.816 --> 01:18:37.817
Children's party's
not exactly your style.

01:18:37.984 --> 01:18:41.153
No, Mary, I was tricked. I was
told there would be free booze.

01:18:43.031 --> 01:18:45.157
I hate kids, as you know.

01:18:45.325 --> 01:18:46.951
Where's Kit Kat, by the way?

01:18:47.285 --> 01:18:50.287
I don't know, she said
she'd be here around 3:00.

01:18:50.372 --> 01:18:53.707
And you know we got purple
cupcakes for her especially.

01:18:53.792 --> 01:18:55.501
Here she is!

01:18:55.669 --> 01:18:57.109
Speak of the devil,
that will be her.

01:18:58.839 --> 01:19:01.340
We'll wait till
Aunty Kit Kat gets here.

01:19:02.342 --> 01:19:03.843
Hey. Jimmy.

01:19:04.010 --> 01:19:05.511
Where's my sister?

01:19:06.847 --> 01:19:07.847
Thought she was here.

01:19:07.973 --> 01:19:09.014
No, she hasn't arrived.

01:19:10.892 --> 01:19:12.435
That's not good.

01:19:12.936 --> 01:19:14.603
What does that mean?

01:19:14.729 --> 01:19:18.232
Um... We had an
argument this morning.

01:19:18.358 --> 01:19:20.609
Over nothing, but
she'd been drinking, so...

01:19:21.528 --> 01:19:25.072
And then she ran out to get
the car to come here and

01:19:25.198 --> 01:19:27.575
I told her to
meet me here so...

01:19:27.951 --> 01:19:31.370
There's a song by Baz
Luhrmann called Sunscreen.

01:19:31.538 --> 01:19:33.706
He says worrying
about the future

01:19:33.790 --> 01:19:35.124
is as effective
as trying to solve

01:19:35.208 --> 01:19:38.043
an algebra equation
by chewing bubble gum.

01:19:38.712 --> 01:19:40.796
The real troubles in your life

01:19:40.922 --> 01:19:44.717
will always be things that never
crossed your worried mind.

01:19:58.273 --> 01:19:59.440
What happened?

01:20:01.234 --> 01:20:02.902
We had a fight.

01:20:03.403 --> 01:20:04.403
And,

01:20:05.739 --> 01:20:08.240
maybe I wasn't
completely sober.

01:20:10.076 --> 01:20:11.952
How is she? Not good.

01:20:12.245 --> 01:20:14.413
When did she leave you?
From where?

01:20:14.581 --> 01:20:16.790
I want it exact.
Exact time. Exact address.

01:20:26.593 --> 01:20:29.136
Here we are. Sorry, sorry.

01:20:29.429 --> 01:20:30.679
Come on.

01:20:31.681 --> 01:20:33.265
God.

01:20:33.600 --> 01:20:35.601
Hi. There she is.

01:20:35.936 --> 01:20:37.937
Does a small baby live here?

01:20:38.104 --> 01:20:42.274
Yes, and she's so excited.
She's downstairs.

01:20:42.859 --> 01:20:44.944
Happy birthday, Posy.

01:20:47.155 --> 01:20:49.698
I'm sorry.
I had to pick up Kit Kat.

01:20:49.824 --> 01:20:51.617
I thought she was
gonna drive herself.

01:20:51.743 --> 01:20:53.536
Turns out she couldn't.

01:20:54.788 --> 01:20:56.914
She okay? Later.

01:20:59.251 --> 01:21:01.210
I'm worried about Kit Kat.

01:21:03.213 --> 01:21:05.214
Yeah. I know.

01:21:05.882 --> 01:21:08.884
She was drinking wine
while we were drinking tea.

01:21:09.511 --> 01:21:11.929
And Jimmy wasn't nice to her.

01:21:12.055 --> 01:21:15.140
And she spurned
the purple cupcakes.

01:21:15.934 --> 01:21:18.269
We have to do
something to fix it.

01:21:20.438 --> 01:21:21.438
Yeah.

01:21:22.440 --> 01:21:24.108
But, you know,

01:21:24.818 --> 01:21:29.071
if it's gonna be fixed, I think she
probably has to do it herself.

01:21:30.490 --> 01:21:31.490
Maybe.

01:21:32.534 --> 01:21:34.034
Maybe not.

01:21:37.998 --> 01:21:40.249
My darling. What's happened?

01:21:40.584 --> 01:21:42.918
You're the best
person in the world.

01:21:43.044 --> 01:21:45.337
You're top equal with
my wife. I don't get it.

01:21:47.048 --> 01:21:49.008
Maybe, just maybe,

01:21:50.135 --> 01:21:51.885
I'm the faller.

01:21:52.762 --> 01:21:56.515
Every family has,
like, someone who falls,

01:21:56.850 --> 01:21:59.810
who doesn't make the grade,
who stumbles,

01:21:59.936 --> 01:22:01.937
who life trips up.

01:22:02.480 --> 01:22:04.565
Maybe I'm our faller.

01:22:05.692 --> 01:22:08.902
No.

01:22:15.994 --> 01:22:18.996
Okay. I'm gonna
tell you a secret.

01:22:19.122 --> 01:22:21.373
And you have to
promise to keep it.

01:22:21.666 --> 01:22:23.042
We've always kept secrets.

01:22:23.168 --> 01:22:24.543
We have?

01:22:24.961 --> 01:22:27.630
You promise you
won't ever, ever, ever,

01:22:27.797 --> 01:22:30.049
ever, ever, ever, ever,

01:22:30.675 --> 01:22:33.344
ever, ever, ever, ever tell?

01:22:33.637 --> 01:22:34.637
Yes.

01:22:40.352 --> 01:22:42.770
I can travel in time.

01:22:45.857 --> 01:22:48.150
Why are we standing in the
cupboard under the stairs?

01:22:48.276 --> 01:22:51.783
Because we're gonna go back in time and
you're gonna do some things differently.

01:22:51.821 --> 01:22:53.697
I love it when you're funny.

01:22:53.823 --> 01:22:56.075
Grab my hand. Close your eyes.

01:23:13.093 --> 01:23:16.512
My God! My God!

01:23:17.222 --> 01:23:21.058
My arsing God in a box.

01:23:25.980 --> 01:23:27.022
You're kidding?

01:23:27.107 --> 01:23:30.818
I can go anywhere in time and you bring
me back to the worst party of all time.

01:23:30.944 --> 01:23:33.028
'Fraid so. Let's go.

01:23:35.949 --> 01:23:36.990
We've got work to do.

01:23:37.117 --> 01:23:38.200
What work?

01:23:38.326 --> 01:23:41.328
Making sure you do
not meet Jimmy Kincade.

01:23:41.454 --> 01:23:42.871
Quick, in here.

01:23:44.791 --> 01:23:46.375
But he's about to
fall in love with me!

01:23:46.501 --> 01:23:48.127
Not this time he isn't.

01:23:57.887 --> 01:24:01.223
Who's the pretty looking girl?
It's Jennifer, isn't it?

01:24:01.349 --> 01:24:02.516
Yeah.

01:24:02.642 --> 01:24:03.851
Wild!

01:24:03.977 --> 01:24:05.310
I like your skirt, Jennifer.

01:24:05.437 --> 01:24:06.770
Thank you.

01:24:06.896 --> 01:24:09.356
Right, I get it.

01:24:09.482 --> 01:24:13.569
If he hadn't met me, he would have
just had sex with someone else.

01:24:13.987 --> 01:24:15.904
Nip it in the bud?

01:24:18.908 --> 01:24:20.576
Excuse me, Jimmy.

01:24:21.661 --> 01:24:23.579
Sorry. Do I know you?

01:24:23.705 --> 01:24:25.539
Yeah, you do.

01:24:26.124 --> 01:24:28.792
Very well. Sorry.

01:24:28.918 --> 01:24:31.253
And this is what I should
have done right at the start.

01:24:37.343 --> 01:24:40.512
Happy New Year, everybody.
Happy New Year.

01:24:40.638 --> 01:24:42.556
And back to the cupboard.

01:24:45.059 --> 01:24:46.226
Amazing!

01:24:46.519 --> 01:24:47.811
What happens now?

01:24:47.937 --> 01:24:49.229
God knows.

01:24:49.355 --> 01:24:51.735
What I'm hoping is that from
this moment on you avoid

01:24:51.774 --> 01:24:54.064
the sleazy bad guys because
they're sleazy and bad.

01:24:54.402 --> 01:24:56.779
When did you get so serious?

01:24:56.905 --> 01:24:59.239
Since it occurred to me
that I might lose you.

01:25:01.993 --> 01:25:04.703
Brace yourself,
this could be weird.

01:25:05.246 --> 01:25:07.206
Things will have changed.

01:25:13.588 --> 01:25:14.922
My God.

01:25:15.048 --> 01:25:16.048
What?

01:25:16.216 --> 01:25:17.257
Jay.

01:25:17.383 --> 01:25:19.176
Jay Jay? Yes.

01:25:19.844 --> 01:25:23.222
And he's adorable. My God.

01:25:24.808 --> 01:25:25.808
Right,

01:25:26.434 --> 01:25:27.935
let's do this.

01:25:33.900 --> 01:25:35.400
Come on, you two.

01:25:36.069 --> 01:25:39.112
Mum's just cracked open
a packet of biscuits.

01:25:44.410 --> 01:25:47.037
I've got
something in mind for you.

01:25:47.121 --> 01:25:48.442
I know
what you're gonna say.

01:25:48.581 --> 01:25:49.981
Have a biscuit and
come and help me.

01:25:51.459 --> 01:25:53.794
But leave the rest for Uncle D.

01:25:56.256 --> 01:25:58.549
Itís just tidying really.

01:25:58.925 --> 01:26:00.926
You all right? I missed you.
Yeah.

01:26:01.469 --> 01:26:04.096
Your mum wants me to do
some gardening. Okay.

01:26:06.307 --> 01:26:09.184
it's tidying up, it's
all a bit out of control.

01:26:09.269 --> 01:26:11.103
Anything that looks dead, out.

01:26:11.271 --> 01:26:14.106
This is what we're looking for.
Okay? All this.

01:26:14.274 --> 01:26:15.607
Dead stuff. See this.

01:26:18.319 --> 01:26:20.737
They've torn them
to shreds, haven't they?

01:26:33.668 --> 01:26:35.460
How did everything go?

01:26:35.587 --> 01:26:37.337
Immensely satisfactory.

01:26:37.755 --> 01:26:41.258
I'm so happy. I wanna
hear all about it.

01:26:41.342 --> 01:26:43.558
Will you do dinner for us
because there's something

01:26:43.597 --> 01:26:45.433
I have to do before
6:00 or I'll get fired?

01:26:45.471 --> 01:26:48.765
Yeah. I can't think of
anything I'd love to do more.

01:26:48.892 --> 01:26:51.977
Okay, where is the most
fabulous person in the world?

01:26:52.145 --> 01:26:56.982
Come to your dad and get mashed
up food shoved into your mouth!

01:27:04.115 --> 01:27:05.574
Hello there, little boy.

01:27:09.495 --> 01:27:10.954
You just

01:27:11.080 --> 01:27:13.498
wait there and I'll
be back in a minute.

01:27:25.845 --> 01:27:27.763
Dad, can I have a quick word?

01:27:27.847 --> 01:27:29.681
Yeah. Sure.

01:27:31.684 --> 01:27:33.518
I can't go back past
the birth again, can I?

01:27:33.645 --> 01:27:35.437
No. I should have
mentioned that.

01:27:35.521 --> 01:27:38.065
You're okay till it
comes out but the exact

01:27:38.191 --> 01:27:40.692
sperm at the exact
moment got you this

01:27:40.860 --> 01:27:42.110
particular baby,

01:27:42.195 --> 01:27:43.946
so if you do anything
the tiniest bit

01:27:44.072 --> 01:27:45.822
different, you'll
have a different child.

01:27:47.951 --> 01:27:52.621
So, every day until yesterday
is as it will always be? Lost?

01:27:53.539 --> 01:27:55.832
Just like for everyone else.

01:27:56.000 --> 01:27:57.876
Okay. interesting.

01:27:58.670 --> 01:28:01.338
Tough. I love you, Dad.
I've gotta go.

01:28:25.738 --> 01:28:27.656
No.

01:28:27.740 --> 01:28:29.341
We're not leaving
this room until we find

01:28:29.409 --> 01:28:33.203
a way of making sure
this never happens again.

01:28:46.050 --> 01:28:47.759
Will you go now?

01:29:01.065 --> 01:29:03.442
I have to leave Jimmy, don't I?

01:29:04.444 --> 01:29:05.944
For good.

01:29:06.904 --> 01:29:10.282
And I have to stop drinking.

01:29:13.202 --> 01:29:15.120
And stop leaving jobs.

01:29:17.123 --> 01:29:21.209
And I have to
go out with someone

01:29:21.961 --> 01:29:24.629
nice and boring.

01:29:27.633 --> 01:29:28.800
Yap.

01:29:32.138 --> 01:29:35.265
And, you know, nice
isn't necessarily boring.

01:29:35.391 --> 01:29:36.641
Like who?

01:29:37.769 --> 01:29:39.269
Matt Damon?

01:29:39.645 --> 01:29:40.979
Okay.

01:29:41.981 --> 01:29:43.565
I'll go out with Matt Damon.

01:29:43.649 --> 01:29:46.902
Tell me,
have you seen Jay recently?

01:29:46.986 --> 01:29:51.490
Your Jay? What, sticky-up hair Jay?
Looks a bit like a Muppet Jay?

01:29:51.616 --> 01:29:52.616
Yes.

01:29:53.451 --> 01:29:56.411
He just popped into my head.
He's always had a crush on you.

01:29:56.788 --> 01:29:58.789
Really? Yeah.

01:30:00.458 --> 01:30:01.625
Weird!

01:30:01.751 --> 01:30:04.127
Thinking of asking him to dinner.
Are you free?

01:30:04.253 --> 01:30:08.006
Might be. Might have to
freshen up a bit first.

01:30:08.132 --> 01:30:10.383
Yeah. You look shit.

01:30:17.058 --> 01:30:18.433
Joanna.

01:30:18.559 --> 01:30:19.976
Thank Christ you're back.

01:30:20.103 --> 01:30:21.686
Itís been a total nightmare.

01:30:21.854 --> 01:30:23.480
I know. it's all fine anyway.

01:30:23.606 --> 01:30:25.107
Where is she?

01:30:25.233 --> 01:30:28.527
it was the single worst night of my life.
Where's Posy?

01:30:29.237 --> 01:30:31.696
There she is! Hello!

01:30:31.823 --> 01:30:34.533
Hello! Hello.

01:30:34.659 --> 01:30:36.868
Darling, how are you doing?

01:30:40.456 --> 01:30:42.374
Let's have another one.

01:30:44.168 --> 01:30:47.212
Screw that. No.

01:30:49.090 --> 01:30:52.092
That hurt and I got fat.
Like fat-fat.

01:30:52.218 --> 01:30:54.511
Got a little
bit fat, didn't she.

01:30:54.846 --> 01:30:56.805
Tell Mummy you want a sister.

01:30:56.931 --> 01:31:01.017
No. Tell Daddy you're happy
being an only child.

01:31:02.770 --> 01:31:05.147
Fortunately we are
young and careless and

01:31:05.273 --> 01:31:07.691
it wasn't long before
there were four of us.

01:31:07.817 --> 01:31:11.194
And this is incredible. Posy
Lake, only 3 years old,

01:31:11.320 --> 01:31:14.281
is about to break the women's
10 meter Olympic record.

01:31:14.407 --> 01:31:18.535
They're gonna do it. And here they
are, they've done it! Fantastic.

01:31:18.661 --> 01:31:21.371
That was brilliant.
You're so good.

01:31:21.497 --> 01:31:22.914
Sleeping right
through all that.

01:31:23.040 --> 01:31:25.292
Can you help me?
I'm so nervous.

01:31:25.376 --> 01:31:27.711
What do I wear for dinner
with our bestselling author?

01:31:27.837 --> 01:31:30.380
Let me finish up with the
monsters and I'll come right up.

01:31:30.506 --> 01:31:31.715
Great. Thank you.

01:31:32.049 --> 01:31:33.466
Go again.

01:31:33.885 --> 01:31:36.511
Okay. How about this?

01:31:36.637 --> 01:31:39.139
That's gorgeous.
Job done. Yeah.

01:31:39.265 --> 01:31:42.434
No. Take it seriously. it's...

01:31:43.060 --> 01:31:46.062
I don't know. No, I hate it.

01:31:46.397 --> 01:31:48.106
Yeah. it's boring and

01:31:48.608 --> 01:31:51.484
makes me look kind of lumpy.

01:31:51.611 --> 01:31:54.404
No, you're right. it is boring and lumpy.
I hate it.

01:31:56.282 --> 01:31:58.158
Okay. What about this?

01:31:58.534 --> 01:32:00.493
Gorgeous. We did it.

01:32:00.620 --> 01:32:03.205
No, it's too breasty.

01:32:03.372 --> 01:32:05.415
Is it? Okay.

01:32:05.541 --> 01:32:06.541
Itís not too breasty.

01:32:06.626 --> 01:32:09.753
No. I'm not wearing these heels.
I look like a prostitute.

01:32:09.837 --> 01:32:11.463
Not high heels, then.

01:32:11.589 --> 01:32:13.173
But then we have
the short legs problem.

01:32:13.299 --> 01:32:15.800
Well, do you want to look
like a prostitute or a dwarf?

01:32:16.928 --> 01:32:19.054
Warning. That's a warning.

01:32:22.725 --> 01:32:23.767
Yes!

01:32:23.893 --> 01:32:24.893
No.

01:32:28.814 --> 01:32:29.814
No!

01:32:30.858 --> 01:32:32.943
Now that I like.

01:32:33.236 --> 01:32:35.695
No, I'm just
picking up the dress

01:32:35.821 --> 01:32:38.323
that this goes under.
Such a bad boy.

01:32:40.743 --> 01:32:41.826
This one?

01:32:41.994 --> 01:32:43.036
Not bad.

01:32:43.663 --> 01:32:44.996
Or this one?

01:32:45.122 --> 01:32:47.624
Itís a trick question, isn't it?
Same dress. No!

01:32:48.167 --> 01:32:49.209
No?

01:32:49.627 --> 01:32:51.795
Okay. I don't think
this one's too bad.

01:32:52.213 --> 01:32:53.880
Yeah, it's fabulous.

01:32:54.340 --> 01:32:55.966
Really? Yeah.

01:32:56.092 --> 01:32:58.426
Okay. Great. Good.

01:32:58.511 --> 01:32:59.636
Um...

01:33:00.096 --> 01:33:01.805
How about the blue one?

01:33:01.931 --> 01:33:03.598
The blue one? Yeah.

01:33:03.724 --> 01:33:06.893
The first one that you tried
on that was boring and lumpy,

01:33:06.978 --> 01:33:09.145
but that wasn't actually
boring and lumpy, that one?

01:33:09.230 --> 01:33:11.147
Yeah, which do you prefer?

01:33:11.274 --> 01:33:13.191
I don't know. I'm actually
starting to go mad.

01:33:13.317 --> 01:33:14.693
I think I like the blue one.

01:33:14.860 --> 01:33:16.236
Okay. Yeah.

01:33:17.697 --> 01:33:20.282
Okay. Okay, let's go
with this one, then?

01:33:20.408 --> 01:33:22.242
You look amazing.

01:33:22.368 --> 01:33:23.535
Really? Yes.

01:33:23.661 --> 01:33:25.245
Okay, thanks.

01:33:25.788 --> 01:33:27.455
God.

01:33:27.915 --> 01:33:29.666
Where's Posy?

01:33:29.959 --> 01:33:31.793
I left her downstairs.

01:33:32.253 --> 01:33:35.588
Not leaving the door open to the
room with the manuscript in it?

01:33:36.632 --> 01:33:38.300
I don't think so.

01:33:39.135 --> 01:33:41.553
Look at me. Look me in

01:33:41.679 --> 01:33:45.098
And talk me through this.
Basically my life is over.

01:33:45.224 --> 01:33:47.809
I really need to go out for just
like two minutes, maybe one.

01:33:47.935 --> 01:33:49.602
Don't you dare!

01:33:50.688 --> 01:33:53.232
Don't you dare answer that!
What am I gonna do?

01:33:53.271 --> 01:33:55.813
I think that we should
really answer the phone.

01:33:55.860 --> 01:33:57.319
If you answer
the goddamn phone,

01:33:57.445 --> 01:33:58.903
I will kill you with the phone.

01:33:58.988 --> 01:34:02.115
I won't answer the phone,
but I do need to get out.

01:34:02.241 --> 01:34:04.242
No, no getting out,
no getting out. No.

01:34:04.368 --> 01:34:05.869
Okay, right.

01:34:05.995 --> 01:34:07.579
Sorry, Mr McEwan.

01:34:07.705 --> 01:34:11.624
We read most of your book but,
you see, the rest of it was

01:34:11.751 --> 01:34:14.377
coloured on or shredded.

01:34:15.713 --> 01:34:16.713
Yeah.

01:34:17.757 --> 01:34:19.799
I had no idea Posy
actually knew how to use

01:34:19.925 --> 01:34:22.010
that machine.
In a way that's impressive.

01:34:23.554 --> 01:34:26.222
What is it? How can I help you?

01:34:28.934 --> 01:34:30.602
Mary.

01:34:31.729 --> 01:34:33.897
No, everything... Sorry.

01:34:34.774 --> 01:34:36.733
Your son will explain.

01:34:36.859 --> 01:34:38.360
Itís your mother.

01:34:39.028 --> 01:34:40.362
Hi, Mum.

01:34:45.868 --> 01:34:47.869
No, no, it's okay. We'll...

01:34:48.079 --> 01:34:49.829
We'll come straight down.

01:34:50.706 --> 01:34:52.040
Okay, bye.

01:35:06.639 --> 01:35:07.972
Hello, darling.

01:35:08.140 --> 01:35:09.474
Mum. How are you?

01:35:10.559 --> 01:35:11.643
Honestly?

01:35:11.769 --> 01:35:12.811
Why not?

01:35:13.229 --> 01:35:15.897
I am fucking furious.

01:35:16.524 --> 01:35:21.194
I am so uninterested in
a life without your father.

01:35:22.405 --> 01:35:24.656
Mary. Come on,
let's make some tea.

01:35:25.533 --> 01:35:26.658
How are you?

01:35:26.826 --> 01:35:27.909
Yeah, I'm fine.

01:35:28.035 --> 01:35:29.160
Did you eat?

01:35:29.286 --> 01:35:30.412
Yes, of course.

01:35:36.460 --> 01:35:37.502
Desmond.

01:35:38.921 --> 01:35:39.754
How are you?

01:35:39.839 --> 01:35:41.589
I'm very well, thanks.

01:35:42.007 --> 01:35:43.675
Though a little hot.

01:35:47.847 --> 01:35:50.515
Your father,
I think, is not so well.

01:35:51.517 --> 01:35:52.600
Cancer.

01:35:53.853 --> 01:35:54.853
Yes.

01:35:55.312 --> 01:35:57.814
I'm very unhappy about it, Tim.

01:35:59.817 --> 01:36:01.818
At your wedding
he said he loved me.

01:36:02.319 --> 01:36:04.320
He does. I know.

01:36:06.282 --> 01:36:08.616
That was
the best day of my life.

01:36:11.203 --> 01:36:13.538
So this is probably the worst.

01:36:19.795 --> 01:36:20.795
Dad.

01:36:23.048 --> 01:36:24.966
For God's sake.

01:36:25.509 --> 01:36:27.343
Not you, too.

01:36:27.470 --> 01:36:28.511
What?

01:36:28.596 --> 01:36:32.390
Well, Kit Kat's just rolled up blubbing
her eyes out and now you're here.

01:36:32.475 --> 01:36:33.933
What's Mum been saying?

01:36:34.143 --> 01:36:35.185
The truth.

01:36:35.311 --> 01:36:36.352
Yeah, well,

01:36:37.521 --> 01:36:39.189
apart from that?

01:36:40.107 --> 01:36:42.817
It may have been the
smoking but I couldn't

01:36:42.943 --> 01:36:45.695
undo that as it was
before you were all born.

01:36:46.405 --> 01:36:49.023
And anyway, your mother definitely
wouldn't have gone out with me

01:36:49.108 --> 01:36:51.359
if I hadn't been
such a sexy smoker.

01:36:54.455 --> 01:36:58.583
I did get diagnosed as soon as
possible, but it was too late.

01:37:00.461 --> 01:37:01.753
How long have we got?

01:37:01.921 --> 01:37:07.091
You know, it, it could be years.

01:37:09.887 --> 01:37:11.554
How long really?

01:37:14.266 --> 01:37:15.892
Weeks, I'm afraid.

01:37:23.400 --> 01:37:25.902
Have we had this
conversation before?

01:37:28.781 --> 01:37:29.781
Yeah.

01:37:31.534 --> 01:37:33.243
What happened?

01:37:33.369 --> 01:37:35.912
I rather let myself down.

01:37:36.330 --> 01:37:37.997
I hugged you.

01:37:57.309 --> 01:37:58.226
Sorry.

01:37:58.310 --> 01:38:01.062
I think I just thought
with the time thing...

01:38:01.689 --> 01:38:03.815
No, I never said
we could fix things.

01:38:03.983 --> 01:38:06.067
I specifically never said that.

01:38:06.193 --> 01:38:08.695
Life's a mixed bag,
no matter who you are.

01:38:08.821 --> 01:38:10.738
Look at Jesus.
He was the Son of God,

01:38:10.864 --> 01:38:12.824
for God's sake, and look
how that turned out.

01:38:12.950 --> 01:38:14.200
I know, but

01:38:15.160 --> 01:38:17.620
you must see
I feel a bit cheated.

01:38:17.746 --> 01:38:20.164
Don't. In fact,
feel the opposite.

01:38:20.332 --> 01:38:22.792
The only people who
give up work at 50

01:38:22.918 --> 01:38:25.169
are the time travelers
with cancer who want

01:38:25.337 --> 01:38:27.589
to play more table tennis
with their sons.

01:38:29.717 --> 01:38:30.717
Right.

01:38:32.511 --> 01:38:34.512
So that's been the deal?

01:38:36.849 --> 01:38:40.518
I'm sorry we had to call.
It's suddenly got very bad.

01:38:46.317 --> 01:38:48.802
And I have something very
important to tell you.

01:38:48.840 --> 01:38:51.362
Or, let me check,

01:38:51.697 --> 01:38:54.324
do you want to
know the big secret,

01:38:54.408 --> 01:38:56.701
or would you rather find it
out for yourself like I did?

01:38:56.827 --> 01:38:58.870
Christ,
there's another secret?

01:38:59.705 --> 01:39:02.874
Less dramatic.
Much more important.

01:39:03.626 --> 01:39:06.294
The real mothership.

01:39:08.881 --> 01:39:11.382
No, go on. Tell me.

01:39:11.717 --> 01:39:13.676
Let's save some time.

01:39:18.891 --> 01:39:22.560
And so he told me his
secret formula for happiness.

01:39:24.563 --> 01:39:26.648
Part one of the two part plan

01:39:26.774 --> 01:39:28.816
was that I should just get on
with ordinary life,

01:39:28.901 --> 01:39:31.903
living it day by day,
like anyone else.

01:39:37.409 --> 01:39:42.246
This is our current statement with a
revised paragraph there, highlighted.

01:39:45.584 --> 01:39:47.919
Rupert. Rupert, is that
the best you can do?

01:39:49.046 --> 01:39:52.256
No. Absolutely not.
We can change that.

01:39:52.383 --> 01:39:53.883
ltem number two.

01:40:01.392 --> 01:40:04.102
Good afternoon, sir. Are you
eating in or taking away today?

01:40:04.269 --> 01:40:05.603
Take away, please.

01:40:05.729 --> 01:40:07.063
Yeah? No problem.

01:40:07.189 --> 01:40:11.192
Lovely, that's 4.24 then, please, sir.
Thank you kindly.

01:40:11.694 --> 01:40:14.278
Lovely. And there's your change, sir.
76 pence change.

01:40:14.405 --> 01:40:16.114
Thanks. Thank you. Hello there.

01:40:16.532 --> 01:40:17.812
Are you eating in
or taking away?

01:40:23.372 --> 01:40:27.083
Do you find the Defendant, John
Welbeck, guilty or not guilty of fraud?

01:40:27.167 --> 01:40:28.209
Not guilty.

01:40:28.293 --> 01:40:31.757
And that is the verdict of you all? Yes.
Thank you. You may be seated.

01:40:32.089 --> 01:40:33.131
Thank God.

01:40:33.257 --> 01:40:35.633
Let the Defendant
be discharged.

01:40:36.301 --> 01:40:38.302
Be upstanding in court.

01:40:51.650 --> 01:40:53.484
Lights out? Yeah.

01:40:54.319 --> 01:40:55.653
Tough day.

01:40:56.989 --> 01:40:59.490
But then came
part two of Dad's plan.

01:41:01.326 --> 01:41:05.663
He told me to live every day
again almost exactly the same.

01:41:06.457 --> 01:41:08.916
The first time with all the
tensions and worries that

01:41:09.001 --> 01:41:11.794
stop us noticing how
sweet the world can be,

01:41:12.087 --> 01:41:14.672
but the second time noticing.

01:41:14.798 --> 01:41:16.299
Okay, Dad.

01:41:17.009 --> 01:41:18.509
Let's give it a go.

01:41:23.932 --> 01:41:25.892
What's our statement
at the moment?

01:41:26.226 --> 01:41:28.895
This is it with the revised...

01:41:34.860 --> 01:41:38.696
Robert, this does not pass.
Is this the best you can do?

01:41:40.532 --> 01:41:42.241
I'll leave you two
to thrash this out.

01:41:45.037 --> 01:41:46.287
Ooh.

01:41:48.874 --> 01:41:50.875
Good afternoon, sir.
Good afternoon.

01:41:51.001 --> 01:41:53.503
Are you eating in or taking away today?
Take away, please.

01:41:53.587 --> 01:41:54.796
Would you like a bag?

01:41:54.922 --> 01:41:56.172
That's fine.

01:41:56.256 --> 01:41:58.889
Lovely. That's 6.23 then, please.
And enjoy the rest of your day.

01:41:58.984 --> 01:42:00.318
Thank you. Bye-bye.

01:42:01.094 --> 01:42:02.094
Hello, there.

01:42:05.766 --> 01:42:07.558
Look around you! What?

01:42:07.684 --> 01:42:08.893
Isn't this room beautiful?

01:42:09.019 --> 01:42:10.186
Yeah.

01:42:10.729 --> 01:42:12.063
Come on.

01:42:12.898 --> 01:42:14.190
Not guilty.

01:42:18.070 --> 01:42:19.403
Fantastic!

01:42:52.563 --> 01:42:54.564
So not such
a bad day after all?

01:42:54.648 --> 01:42:57.733
No. it was pretty good really.

01:42:58.777 --> 01:43:01.445
Very good day, actually,
as it turns out.

01:43:02.322 --> 01:43:04.782
Well, that's a relief,

01:43:05.784 --> 01:43:08.786
because if it had
been a very bad day,

01:43:09.246 --> 01:43:13.249
I thought I might have had to have
had sex with you to make up for it.

01:43:14.793 --> 01:43:15.793
Goodnight.

01:43:20.799 --> 01:43:23.175
It was a very, very bad day.

01:43:23.302 --> 01:43:25.678
It went very, very badly.

01:43:25.804 --> 01:43:28.472
I got fired from my job.

01:43:29.308 --> 01:43:31.475
And then I killed a man.

01:43:37.149 --> 01:43:39.317
That is a very bad day.

01:43:39.484 --> 01:43:41.485
Itís terrible. Yeah.

01:43:42.446 --> 01:43:44.780
Like the worst day ever.

01:43:45.324 --> 01:43:46.991
So sorry.

01:43:51.914 --> 01:43:55.499
Some days, of course, though,
you only want to go through once.

01:43:56.335 --> 01:43:57.501
You okay?

01:44:49.012 --> 01:44:51.889
Right, are we ready for this?

01:44:52.307 --> 01:44:55.726
'Course we're not. Hateful day.

01:44:56.561 --> 01:44:59.397
Just give me one minute.

01:45:21.753 --> 01:45:23.754
This is so brilliant.

01:45:24.673 --> 01:45:29.343
Dickens is so good on
actual jokes, actual gags.

01:45:30.262 --> 01:45:32.013
Where have you come from?

01:45:32.389 --> 01:45:33.931
Itís the...

01:45:34.266 --> 01:45:35.933
Okay.

01:45:36.226 --> 01:45:37.768
Big day.

01:45:38.603 --> 01:45:42.064
Thanks for dropping in.
How's Uncle Desmond's suit?

01:45:42.190 --> 01:45:44.025
Immaculate.

01:45:44.276 --> 01:45:45.276
Excellent.

01:45:45.944 --> 01:45:47.624
Did I mention I wanted
the Nick Cave track?

01:45:47.696 --> 01:45:49.363
Itís taken care of.

01:45:49.448 --> 01:45:50.906
Thank you.

01:45:51.283 --> 01:45:53.617
Can I just read
you this one bit?

01:45:57.956 --> 01:46:00.458
Read away,
I've got lots of time.

01:46:01.126 --> 01:46:03.002
?'l think the Romans
must have aggravated

01:46:03.086 --> 01:46:05.796
?'one another very
much with their noses.

01:46:05.964 --> 01:46:09.467
?'Perhaps they became the restless
people they were in consequence.

01:46:09.593 --> 01:46:12.803
?'Anyhow, Mr Wopsle's Roman
nose so aggravated me...?'

01:47:48.692 --> 01:47:51.026
What do you
think about the kids?

01:47:51.153 --> 01:47:52.653
What about them?

01:47:53.697 --> 01:47:55.906
Not many of them, are there?

01:47:56.992 --> 01:47:57.992
What?

01:47:58.702 --> 01:48:00.703
Well, I mean two?

01:48:03.498 --> 01:48:05.875
Itís more than
the Chinese are allowed.

01:48:07.836 --> 01:48:10.504
I just thought
that maybe, you know,

01:48:11.590 --> 01:48:13.340
it was time for
the insurance baby.

01:48:13.425 --> 01:48:14.425
What?

01:48:14.509 --> 01:48:15.926
In case one of them
is really smart,

01:48:16.011 --> 01:48:18.408
we don't want the other one to
feel stupid their whole life.

01:48:18.446 --> 01:48:22.725
And if we had a third one, then
we could have two happy dummies.

01:48:25.520 --> 01:48:27.188
What do you think?

01:48:31.526 --> 01:48:34.028
It was the toughest
decision of my life.

01:48:34.529 --> 01:48:36.947
Saying 'yes' to
the future meant

01:48:37.073 --> 01:48:39.450
saying 'goodbye'
to my dad. Forever.

01:48:41.244 --> 01:48:43.245
Why don't we wait a bit?

01:48:46.124 --> 01:48:47.291
Absolutely.

01:48:48.126 --> 01:48:50.127
You're right. Yeah.

01:48:54.758 --> 01:48:57.551
How about now?

01:48:59.471 --> 01:49:00.804
Or now?

01:49:03.141 --> 01:49:04.308
Now?

01:49:11.733 --> 01:49:12.733
Yeah,

01:49:14.110 --> 01:49:15.110
okay.

01:49:16.613 --> 01:49:17.655
Really?

01:49:19.950 --> 01:49:22.618
Dad always wished
there had been more of us.

01:49:23.411 --> 01:49:24.411
So...

01:49:26.831 --> 01:49:29.500
Anyway, we might try
and nothing happens.

01:49:30.085 --> 01:49:31.085
Exactly.

01:49:39.844 --> 01:49:41.845
Really could be tonight.

01:49:41.930 --> 01:49:44.431
And you cannot believe
the detail in which

01:49:44.516 --> 01:49:46.433
I know the route
to the hospital.

01:49:46.518 --> 01:49:47.851
Yap.

01:49:51.189 --> 01:49:53.023
Will you excuse me for a sec?

01:49:53.942 --> 01:49:55.609
Just have to go downstairs.

01:50:12.294 --> 01:50:15.296
and it's 17-20 in
this incredibly tight contest

01:50:15.380 --> 01:50:17.172
being played by
the two most physically

01:50:17.299 --> 01:50:19.049
perfect players in
the history of the game.

01:50:19.217 --> 01:50:22.052
The crowd, enchanted by the
younger player, are seduced

01:50:22.137 --> 01:50:24.888
by memories of the older
player's illustrious past.

01:50:26.891 --> 01:50:28.892
My God, I've won.

01:50:29.728 --> 01:50:32.062
I haven't won in years.

01:50:32.564 --> 01:50:34.523
You finally got good.

01:50:35.233 --> 01:50:38.861
What's my prize? Apart from the
Olympic gold medal, of course.

01:50:39.904 --> 01:50:41.113
A kiss will have to do.

01:50:41.239 --> 01:50:44.241
A kiss?

01:50:49.581 --> 01:50:51.540
I get you.

01:50:52.917 --> 01:50:54.418
This is it, then?

01:50:56.379 --> 01:50:57.755
This is it.

01:50:58.548 --> 01:51:00.758
Itís my last bit of extra time.

01:51:02.052 --> 01:51:03.677
The baby is
completely on the way.

01:51:24.783 --> 01:51:26.116
Congratulations.

01:51:33.124 --> 01:51:34.625
My son.

01:51:37.962 --> 01:51:39.588
My dad.

01:51:44.552 --> 01:51:46.595
Is there anything
at all I can do?

01:51:46.721 --> 01:51:48.806
Is there anything
you want to do?

01:51:50.600 --> 01:51:53.268
I don't know. There is this

01:51:55.063 --> 01:51:56.730
one thing.

01:51:57.065 --> 01:51:59.149
A quick little walk.

01:51:59.275 --> 01:52:01.151
Totally against the rules,
of course,

01:52:01.277 --> 01:52:03.153
but if we don't change a thing,

01:52:03.488 --> 01:52:06.824
if we're very careful,
it shouldn't do any harm.

01:52:07.325 --> 01:52:08.951
It would be nice.

01:52:39.357 --> 01:52:42.359
I'm really trying.
I'm really trying.

01:52:44.195 --> 01:52:45.487
Get down low.

01:52:50.201 --> 01:52:51.201
Total defeat.

01:53:00.962 --> 01:53:02.296
I'm tired.

01:53:03.298 --> 01:53:04.715
Thanks, Dad.

01:53:20.231 --> 01:53:23.066
So I'm almost
up-to-date with my story.

01:53:23.568 --> 01:53:27.070
As all families do, we got
used to life after death.

01:53:27.197 --> 01:53:29.072
And it was still fine.

01:53:29.866 --> 01:53:34.036
And things settled back into their traditional
rhythms season after season,

01:53:34.496 --> 01:53:36.914
and are much as
they have always been.

01:53:38.249 --> 01:53:40.918
And we've got used to
Kit Kat being happy again.

01:53:41.878 --> 01:53:44.379
And then we got used
to her being a mum.

01:53:44.756 --> 01:53:47.424
Albeit not a very
good or even safe one.

01:53:48.843 --> 01:53:50.219
And in the end,

01:53:50.345 --> 01:53:54.014
I think I've learned the final
lesson from my travels in time.

01:53:54.807 --> 01:53:57.851
And I've even gone one step
further than my father did.

01:54:08.821 --> 01:54:10.489
Okay, I'll do the kids.

01:54:12.325 --> 01:54:14.910
No, don't worry. I'll do them.

01:54:15.036 --> 01:54:16.703
Yeah, you do them,
you lazy bum.

01:54:17.872 --> 01:54:19.836
The truth is, I now
don't travel back at all.

01:54:19.874 --> 01:54:21.875
Not even for the day.

01:54:22.293 --> 01:54:24.878
I just try to
live every day as if

01:54:25.004 --> 01:54:27.631
I've deliberately
come back to this one day

01:54:28.007 --> 01:54:31.677
to enjoy it as if it
was the full final day

01:54:31.928 --> 01:54:34.680
of my extraordinary,
ordinary life.

01:55:02.959 --> 01:55:06.670
Hello, you're down already. That's great.
Thank you so much for that.

01:55:06.796 --> 01:55:08.171
And in we go.

01:55:09.799 --> 01:55:12.593
Posy? Posy!

01:55:20.977 --> 01:55:21.977
That's fine.

01:55:43.458 --> 01:55:46.293
We're all travelling
through time together

01:55:46.586 --> 01:55:48.754
every day of our lives.

01:55:48.921 --> 01:55:51.423
All we can do is do our best

01:55:51.883 --> 01:55:54.635
to relish this remarkable ride.

01:56:37.595 --> 01:56:39.513
Yes, yes, yes...

01:56:51.818 --> 01:56:53.902
Okay, I'll see you then.

01:56:54.028 --> 01:56:55.445
Bye-bye.

01:56:56.114 --> 01:56:57.614
See you later.

01:56:57.638 --> 01:57:17.638
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